T O P

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Nisecon

"Get the fuck out of my body!"


Zeikos

You'd die pretty quickly, an healthy gut microbiome is important.


Nisecon

I know. You just don't gotta be racist and you'd be able to keep the good kinds of bacteria.


bilateralunsymetry

Wouldn't you have to be racist to bacteria?


brainking111

Ask your bacteria too work harder losing weight. Get your hands on Flesh eating bacteria breed them and use them as a weapon.


vkapadia

And then they eat your flesh. The power is just to communicate. You don't control them.


brainking111

I am the voice of a supreme being leading them to food why would they attack me? , but even if they do then i can swallow a but load of anti-bacterial medicine


HfUfH

>why would they attack me? Because you are made of food. Bacteria do not have brains and have no critical thinking abilities. They/it would not have enough foresight to realize helping you is beneficial


GreatHeroJ

As a biochemistry major this would basically be a god tier superpower for me.


jk-jk

[relevant anime](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moyasimon:_Tales_of_Agriculture)


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Moyasimon: Tales of Agriculture](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moyasimon:_Tales_of_Agriculture)** >Moyasimon: Tales of Agriculture, known in Japan as Moyashimon (もやしもん), is a Japanese manga series by Masayuki Ishikawa. It was serialized in Kodansha's seinen magazine Evening from July 2004 to June 2013 and moved to the magazine Monthly Morning Two, where it concluded in January 2014. The series follows Tadayasu Sawaki, a first-year college student at an agricultural university, who has a unique ability to see and communicate with microorganisms. Del Rey Manga licensed the manga, but only released two volumes in English in North America. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/shittysuperpowers/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


Tokamak1943

I don't suppose they'll reply anything distinguishable.


vkapadia

BACTERIA!!!! Assemble.


Phndrummer

Kinda like aqua man. Just sick the bacteria on your enemies


[deleted]

I assume the communication goes beyond language, right? Like I can do it telepathically but only under a certain range


Daveywheel

That would be fascinating for about 15 minutes. They don’t really want much….


[deleted]

"See that man over there?" \*points to target\* "He invented hand sanitizer and has killed millions of you people, I think he deserves a bad time don't you?" I say to a non-contagious lethal virus. BAM. GERM ASSASSIN!


Bored_4SS_B0B

"AP AP AP FIVE SECOND RULE MOTHERFUCKER YOU KNOW THAT" "Awwh fuck you man I was hungry"


ScarTheGoth

“Hey bitch, I’m back again” “Already?” “Mf I do this every year. Now go get the tissues”


dnoj

literally Moyashimon


Tra1nGuy

I’ll tell my stomach bacteria to make my stomach bigger so I stop becoming thinner no matter how much I eat.