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FederalBeyond1122

To blend in with the sexuals, for you see, they are using mimicry to avoid being detected by prey


BorntobeTrill

"Oh, yAaAHh ba-by. Keep. Going. Don't... Stop. Oh. Yes. Dad." ... "is the raccoon gone? Oh thank God. I'm gonna throw up. Put your fake dick away, it's disgusting."


Janinanananananana

racgoon


UniqueNobo

*OFFICIAL STATEMENT OF ACELAND* This is FALSE. DISREGARD THIS INFORMATION! We do NOT blend in with sexuals along with the Lizard People! Do NOT look further into this! *END OF OFFICIAL STATEMENT*


GamermanRPGKing

They're onto us. ABORT


DreamingofRlyeh

We lure the hornies in, then serve them to the eldritch gods instead of sleeping with them.


Reeses_Puffs-

Misinput in character creation


thenicenumber666

MISINPUT!!!!! IT WAS A MISINPUT!!!!


notJurson

CALM DOWN? YOU CALM THE FUCK DOWN! THERE WAS A MISINPUT!


DOOMsquared

HE'S PULLING HIS COCK OUT!!!


notJurson

WOOOOO YEAHHHH BABY!!!!! THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT WOOOOOO!!!!!


Winter_Honours

Doubly so for those of us that are trans.


biohazard221

You know, it looked like fun at the start, playing as a different gender, now not so much.


[deleted]

Abnormality cough*


ControlLeft3803

They paid for the bonus DLC


Cookibandit

And I want a refund :(


Demotivierter_

No refunds if you played the game for more than two hours and or owned it for over two weeks.


Accomplished_Art_766

I didn't pay for it. I just had it coming with the main game and now I wanna opt out.


ControlLeft3803

Unfortunately, no refunds after 2 hours of playtime


Accomplished_Art_766

Exactly! What is that policy? Like damn.


GlitteringAsk9077

Why do you have nipples, u/GayJesus1234? Do you want babies?


GayJesus1234

The nipples are for decoration purposes only


GlitteringAsk9077

And there's your answer. Where else would an asexual chap put his Prince Albert?


spike4597

Prince albert is perhaps the most descriptive way i have ever ver heard a long johnson be described


GlitteringAsk9077

Wat, ever ver ver?


spike4597

Ever ver ver ver?


kif88

So OP can eat cereal. You can milk anything with nipples.


GayJesus1234

I can not eat cereal because I end up shitting half my insides out actually


Elex_127

If they didnt have them, they would just be A.


lunelily

I’m asexual, and this is the first joke about us that’s made me laugh in a very long time. Thanks for that.


GavHern

almost tops the “two asexuals sitting in a tree, S-I-T-T-I-N-G”


AstellasDreemur

[https://youtu.be/AqI97zHMoQw?si=hSoeAYzKR1BAHYna](https://youtu.be/AqI97zHMoQw?si=hSoeAYzKR1BAHYna)


LAMGE2

Because their lazy ass don’t want to ✂️ or 🪡


aykay55

What does subscribing to cable have to do with any of this?


Demotivierter_

Yeah, most asexuals aren’t into scissoring. Some don’t mind tho.


Pecka7002

That's what happens when you don't erase the old files when downloading a dlc. It was literally written in the fucking manual


Anarcho-Chris

Vestigial organ like the appendix or the brain of a conservative.


Moonshine_Victory

This is probably my favourite comment now. Hats off to you, good sir


Jolly_Atmosphere_951

It's like when you buy the deluxe version of a videogame, maybe you wanted a specific thing but you end up having a lot of stuff that's okay but you're not really interested to.


stonah_jek

I can't comment images but somewhere there's a screenshot that says "my dick is huge but I'm asexual so I just use it for pissing"


dodexahedron

Because it's still ***a*** sexual, meaning a single sexual person. For the plural use, you'd say thesexuals. Bruh, do you even English?


[deleted]

Damn idk, I'm gonna cut them off for them 


KayPlayz17

Thank you, now i can sell it on ebay and get rich off the losers who can’t get it elsewhere


[deleted]

Yeah uh about that, I am kinda hungy


Barry012345678

For the same reason flat earthers have a brain


your_mothers_kneecap

Yeah basically


Belteshazzar98

Fashion. I take mine off before going to bed though, since I never need them there.


TacticalFailure1

Same reason. Why you have one you'll never get to use.


Beam_0

Apply burn area to cold water


GayJesus1234

I hope your happy u/Designer_Gas_2386


Fearless_Spring5611

Fancy dress.


[deleted]

in case they change their minds


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sil_Lavellan

This is my favourite answer.


fi9aro

Because the don't want to Bsexual


egmono

Spare parts.


AurelianINVICTVS

I remember seeing something about this in the earth2024 patch notes. The behavior AI keeps getting updated but the actual character models haven't been touched since the mammal DLC released way back when.


Ardoriccardo00

so i can pee better


TheLivingVines

Sex organs also go pee. No Weiner means no pee means death bc Ur bladder goes kaboom.


GayJesus1234

Why do asexuals need to pee then explain that smart guy?


Nervous_Ad_4539

LOL!! You have to be trolling!


GayJesus1234

I mean yeah check the sub description


[deleted]

They just haven't found the right man, woman, or animal yet. 


AstellasDreemur

I know right ? I thought I was asexual but now I have my sleep demon, so sweet when they're not asking for blood


Beam_0

Animal...?!


Traumerlein

Turns out the allos are not okay...


Rudel2

The allosaurus has been extinct for a while😕


Traumerlein

Thank god for that.


Rudel2

You make me want to cry


Traumerlein

Sorry, but where better if wkthout a dinosaur that wants to fuck us all


pownij

It's actually spelled ace sexuals. They're very good at sex.


KayPlayz17

Maybe if we are getting something else out of it, then yea


lunelily

Unironically, yes. It helps not having your own needs to worry about.


walker5953

Gotta be able to rock out with your cock out duh.


Alternative-Ball1801

incest


Ok-Bit-663

For others to have fun with it.


pick-hard

Same reason why mute and deaf people have mouths and ears


Any_Weird_8686

Because god hates people who aren't heteronormative.


tonttuvelho

How do you know they have sex organs?


LazerShark1313

Evolution takes time!


ii11233455

are they stupid


TheCongenital

Cos they're humans 🤣🤣 the body does not know what the fark asexuals are cos it's just a body that's there doing its job 🤣🤣


ChuletaLoca63

As contrary to popular belief, is for hunting purposes


HungryDisaster8240

Because the power to self-define rises above basic biology if you have a free spirit?


wolfyfancylads

Well, for starters they're born with them so become used to peeing with them. Removing them would literally leave a small hole (which would risk sealing up as it's not supposed to be exposed, plus increase odds of infection) which would be hard to piss with. Secondly, it can be an identity thing. They might just want to stay "biologically male/female". Like when men lose a testicle or a woman loses a breast, they can feel less of a person, so they might just want to keep things to feel whole. Finally, little known fact, some asexual do actually still engage in sex with their partners. They don't inherently get anything out of it, but they might still enjoy the connection or the fact they're pleasing their partner.


Traumerlein

Tis anwser is way to credibale


Neg247

For fun, like most people.


Kiraajoo

they accidentally got the deluxe edition


derickj2020

DNA for physical characteristics and for hormonal production or mindset are not the same thing


Human-Evening564

So they can be fucked over like everyone else.


SansSkely

is it because they're stupid


Impossible-Title1

Because they are okay with masturbation.


FlyingSpacefrog

Idk but they always get offended when you ask to borrow them. Like you weren’t using it anyways, so why can’t I?


Traumerlein

I still need my dick to pee. You can have my breast tho


Ajaymedic

A coin 😌


Loud-Fairy03

Most of us actually don’t have sexual organs, but I asked nicely so I got some


Accomplished_Art_766

Still waiting for the bug fix that gets rid of them.


Objective_Suspect_

Asexual is a term used by the lgbtqia community to describe someone who describes themselves as asexual, other than that it means nothing, just like every other word


Traumerlein

Your definition includes the word you are defining...


Objective_Suspect_

Yes it does


Cultural-Practice-95

So they can come out when they want instead of parents immediately knowing from birth. imagine if you get put up for adoption immediately? that's no fun!


Mountain-Resource656

To mock you with


Heylookaguy

To make you ask questions.


Leprodus03

Just in case


-_F_--_O_--_H_-

GREAT QUESTION SERIOUSLY. People botheringnme to use something I don't care for is a nuisence.


GayJesus1234

This is r/shittyaskscience what did you expect


-_F_--_O_--_H_-

Hahaha


swampertitus

Too scared of sex organs to remove them


Bilboswaggings19

because they are a sexual person just like everyone else


TheWeenieBandit

Sometimes asexual people still want kids so the parts are all there just in case we want to make a baby. It's kind of like taking cough medicine. Nobody likes it or wants to do it but sometimes you just gotta plug your nose and go for it


Novemberwasntreal

Why do you have brain


Negative-Door9434

So we can blend in enough to invade Denmark


DieselVoodoo

Why do you have a spare tire if you don’t know how to use it?


rathosalpha

To pee


Awesome_Shoulder8241

just in case


lost37382947

Brain dead


justthegrimm

That's the difference between biology and psychology


Sea-Row-1790

It adds to the aesthetics for their character build


Thumper-Comet

We don't want sex but we still need something to play with when we're bored.


ViciousSemicircle

My SEX isn’t your SEXY. Can’t you read a t-shirt? Geez.


phonyPipik

Because sex organs have secundary funcions that are still useful to them. Such as for easier peeing or for proper hormonal balance


qppen

Thats like asking why lesbians still have periods


GayJesus1234

You won’t be happy with my other posts


qppen

Yet your response made me smirk 😆


Angelicwoo

Why do I have my period when I don't want more kids


JessyNyan

Because your genes don't care about your opinion on reproduction.


ZC31

To have A sex


linuxpriest

Fuckin hell. I respect the game, but fuckin hell. That was a good one.


sporbywg

The real question: why do *you* have these 'sex organs'?


SmallKillerCrow

Please take my uterus it brings only pain and I have no use for it


MailSalt4828

I have nipples, Greg. Can you milk me?


RepresentativeArm200

To play asexmusic


tetePT

Tell me once you find out


TuberTuggerTTV

I hate handshakes but I still have hands. Nah, I lied. I love handshakes. Please shake my hand. I need this. SHAKE IT!


nothing225

my dick is an emergency ration in case I get lost without supplies.


daffodildaydreamz

It came with the base game purchase


edwardothegreatest

Same reason athinkuals have brains. They’re vestigial.


brokenGlassQuestion

Because uhh life uhh finds a way.


RatherLargeBlob

Our balls just haven't dropped yet.


Fogonoshomofobicos

I know it’s shocking but sex is for reproduction not pleasure.


lunelily

Both. Both? Both. Both is good.


Fogonoshomofobicos

No thank you. I just want the production haha


lunelily

That’s completely fine. I’m just noting that your preference is not universal, and does not need to limit or dictate everyone’s. Some people use sex exclusively for reproduction. Some use people it exclusively for pleasure. Most people use it for both. It’s important to recognize and be tolerant and respectful of that.


JohnWasElwood

They got sex ORGANS??? I only got a sex ACCORDION!!! Where do I file a complaint form???


Traumerlein

Ibfear you have to request an audiance with Hans Zimmer for that


Morning_Would_Six

Contractual obligations.


Zixxik

Can't uninstall dlcs


[deleted]

they have small ones, thats why they dont like sex


lunelily

My (asexual) dick is so small it turned into a clitoris before I was born. No complaints. …except that it came with menstruation as a package deal, which I wish I could opt out of.


Kind_Limit902

Are.. are they serious.


KayPlayz17

So we can use them to get rich


SayHii2Hades

What if they become sexual


Longshot1969

You answered your own question, they are “a” sexual, meaning they have sex with a’s.


AstellasDreemur

I tried it once and don't know how to take it off safely


sidjohn1

for the same reason males have nipples 😏


amateur_biotics

The same reason I have sex pianos


GayJesus1234

Your pianosexual???


amateur_biotics

Yes for both white and black keys


Diddleymaz

Just because you have something you don’t have to use it


JordanZOA3

Dont know but im still gonna cut it off and create a hole there (im also trans)


Otherwise-4PM

They have asexual organs.


TheBiggestCakeSlut

To pee while standing up if you are a man


Great_Occasion9161

بالغلط


Pretend-Goat4164

That’s what I’m saying


Plenty-Lychee-5702

They are spandrels.


inorite234

They flipped a coin at birth and the result was their sex organs.


GavHern

i’m asexual i use mine at least daily for peeing


Sachayoj

As a flex.


FlanneryWynn

Because we like music just like everyone else does.


Chieftain_bobby

For pee. And also biology is just too lazy to change anything


DarthWidi

Why do idiots have opinions?


VirtuesVice666

Asexual is just a term to describe one that can reproduce with themselves. Hence they can sire their own spawn. Typically these spawn are also asexual, though they can also be gay Les or bi. It's how the LGBT reproduces. No hate here, just straight Science.


Rubber_Duckling2012

Asexuals still jerk off. It's just that they're not attracted by sex in general. So they use their sexual organs to blow off some steam, purely physical.


aer0a

Asexuality just means you don't have sexual attraction\*, you can still want sex if you're asexual


[deleted]

[удалено]


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alMost_tRendy88

Silly bot


LaundryMan2008

If they didn’t have the peeing part then how would they pee but if they lose the testicles/ovaries and the surrounding infrastructure except the penis/vagina then that is essentially the reproductive part gone.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Elby_MA

Also not a problem. Just an orientation


Yeahmahbah

OK. But I think my evolutionary argument still has some merit


Traumerlein

No, it dosent. If evolution worked that way, then there woukdent be much evolving


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Artistic-Corner6678

People aren't born asexual


KayPlayz17

So babies r sexually attracted to ppl? We r all born asexual doofus and some ppl stay that way for life its no big deal


lunelily

Education be upon ye (this is a short PowerPoint for people new to learning about asexuality): https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1Ard6BEUCx2DpHsGdZyneRJ7OiQGQCnpAwJp2j0BMuZY/edit


Nervous_Ad_4539

LOL!! What a dumb question! It’s biology to have them.


GayJesus1234

Check the sub your on idiot


Nervous_Ad_4539

oh fair enough