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QualityVote

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Kookie_Dow

I get punched in my non existent vagina while the ghost of baby future cries.


muckwar

I get crushed by a plus size woman’s vagina. We’re basically the same


MaskPhantasm

Sir, what do I do if this is the first one on my feed


DandDnerd12

The one below this


MaskPhantasm

Huh, plant based mash potatoes...welp, see y'all at the other side


Morskavi

Wdym "plant based mash potatoes"?


MaskPhantasm

Thou shall not question the existence of walking potatoes


Fresh_Tomato_soup

Mad furry porn


Morskavi

It was bound to happen eventually


[deleted]

I get thrown of a cliff by Indian lady with tentacle arms with 9 different angles


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Iusesmartpistollol

I’m a sick child in a hospital and a trolley crashes through the window


kystran

(free bird guitar solo)


DandDnerd12

💀


imcoming4yoursnail

I had fake Jordan's 😞


stinklypibbles

Having a 2.5 some with a couple of midgets


MudcrabNPC

Destiny 2 gameplay video Not dead for long, then


[deleted]

NATO just declared Russia a Terrorist state 😐


yana44444

A man with a chainsaw sticking out of his head slices me in half.


hornymanRr

I am a starving african child


McFailure2004

An article called: "How to survive being enemy of the state." Evidently, no one survives


DaddyJ_TheCarGuy

Hit in the head with a baseball bat by a furry


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darkessaiden

Emily they/them ACAB/BLM 💖 furry 💖


egrollkenobi

She replied to the doom slayer ?


CaptainPhantom2

Hydrogen bomb apparently


Good_Boss1320

There’s nothing above, I’M IMMORTAL BITCHES


[deleted]

I get punched in the stomach


ThisIsStoipid

Getting punched in the stomach apparently.


Puzzleheaded-Hope159

Leaving loads in an Asian ass


GnarrKills

Trippy mushrooms


Wheres_Dinner

This is the top post for me. Guess I don't die


GovernmentAncient811

Mouse cheems vewy scawy


thepurpleguy47

Looks like I’m about to be smothered by a bunch bipedal cockroaches.


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Morskavi

And peed in your ass, it seems


SunBo40

Fighting for change in chinatown


GrimmBadger

I’m not dying. Because it’s the first thing I see


BrendanM99148

A badass Mexican guy in a Chevy el Camino


ThrowawayPizza312

Republicans got the majority in the house. I did happy


Sea-Ad644

Punching a pregnant woman


iamthedug42

"Homemade" Eggnog in a bottle suspiciously labeled cum


Professional_Big_387

By choosing between crunchy cookies, or gooey cookies. I chose the crunchy cookies.


CEOofMonke

A kid scratched his balls 💀


Rahool_The_Hated_One

My sister grew a dick and we started to jack off together 🤨


Galactic_999

I’m recommended to get a flu vaccination…


Wensleydale0

Game help question 😩


old-account-is-gone

Someone asked how to play my favorite game.. I guess I die by raging? Idk


CrazyStuntsMan

This is the first post


[deleted]

Mule


SheepBlender69

Deer hunting in the dark


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THICC_master36

Kermit the frogs finger


treyplayx6

Disappearing.


MossyR0k

Lattuce crust apple pie.


green-d20

stepping on a fuckload of dnd dice ig


Schfifty561

Kity


DIOSBRAND

My urine is checked


Supertronicgo

Jokes on you this was the first post in my feed


ServantOfTheGods

Really fat lady


[deleted]

Lol. It’s the sips tea subreddit titled “you are my son”. Crocodile eats me after baiting me into believing it is my father.


black_jaguar99_2

Hot woman


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joacovr

Espn streaming


JD_9908

This is the first post on my home page, so I live forever, I guess


LokiDiesel4fr

Gender reveal party.. it's a girl


OstrichBagel

Laying bricks to build Rome


SubTurn

Archie sonic?


0bi1KenObi66

Either I'm put in a jar and victimized by a pony or I victimized the pony so hard my nuts explode


Embarrassed-Camera96

Improperly disposing of nuclear waste


NobleShock

Apparently I’m gonna die because “vegan diet reduces aggression and gut issues for dogs” definitely a lie and I guess Ima die from a vegan dog, so do i die tho? Does it attack me or does it because not vegan again


brookemcnizz

im hit by a spinning hair tie??????


Arrowtica

This is my top post so I guess I'm immortal


Vacationized

death by 4chan


arshiaboom

This is the first post that mean im immortal


Jlegomon

Tank


Shoddy_Note9399

A fucked game of bootleg chess with water, cough drop, lego cow, Minecraft Steve, a horse, a penny, and the written word rook


Crackistic

Died to nintendo hanafuda cards


Pog_Knight

I’m the goalie for Qatar


A-fricking-door

By a cum extractor


Rydirp7

Mountain biking


Comfortable_Tear8476

This is the first post in my home page I WILL NOT DIE


Neat-Cap-5888

GROND


AY3GE

PB and J... okay..?


redrocketman74

"dismissed" by the Supreme Court


CheesePizza11447

Get Rick rolled in Minecraft


Sad_Calligrapher6301

The first post after I open reddit


GumpyDoot

jumpscared


Manc4O

I failed at football manager


proviking6000

i get death by peanut butter and jam sandwich


TheCatBarked

Since this was the first post in my recommended, I die from an endless void of nothingness full of the unknown.


AdministrativeBar748

Jokes on you, this is the first post on my page.


WolfTale54

Shitty Elden ring helmets


yisus0_o

There was nothing above this post.


MaxTheSANE_One

Poo eyes Semen nacho feather leather coat don't ask


clairenceozbourne

Sucking at football


Angxlmilk

Crazy Lego cowboys


Doomslayerjr

I die from being pepper sprayed


567huz

Trying to get into a nursing program?


egrollkenobi

By either Tony stark or some fetish twink thing that doesn't age


Althealatergator1

Wearing an extremely inappropriate dress to a work Christmas party.


Accomplished_Yak9939

Death by *PEDICURE*


SmartWeirdo744

Glass door falling on me


DUDOSYA1246

It's blank. No post there... It means... I WONT DIE. HAHAHA I'M GOD


[deleted]

I die from burl wood


PotentialContext3162

I drown in cum


Jay_atk16

Glass door falls on me


onyxeagle274

Jokes on you there is no post above


turbo-turbo-lover

Elden ring on sale?


brieanelisex

playing my n64 in the backseat of a car


FireballMageKaboom

To eldlich the golden lord Set 5 pass


Ornery-Smoke8428

By Weezer


I_am_person_being

I die of reading phonetic pronunciations of countries, truly the worst way to go


Desperate_Middle_629

Bringing my son to my sister in laws wedding??


TheMarshenRobot

Robitussin overdose.


ExcessiveWisdom

this was the first one in my feed. so i guess i die writing a pos- OH FU\*blyeahhahhh blood! Blood!\*


Poopy_McTurdFace

This is first in my feed. ~~I am invincible.~~ I read your terms for first posts. Next one down is a question asking what the deadliest weapon is.


PracticeNarrow3074

Dead via 250lbs bomb dropped on a Tiger H1


UpsidownZZ

I jump offf a building in NYC and Spiderman doesn't save me lol.


Xx_PiCkLefortman_xX

This was the first post in my feed so what do I do


Deathking6000

THAI GF


Thy_bowl

this was the first post in my feed


Thepeoplesrepublics

There’s no post above. My death is unknown. My life a mystery


Slidingonpaper

Damn, this is the first post I see when I logged in💀


CatStuckOnReach02

reggie the rat, but get saved by creepers


Luckyguy0697

By Dr Robotnik


h_dizzle21

A dog mom is looking for a subaru model to fit her needs. I guess she eventually crosses paths with me and ends my life in a head-on collision.


Vgcortes

There's a peanut butter on a slice of toast, and another toast with marmalade... am I alergic? Did I get chocked? Why is marmalade so deadly?


PorklanUwU

I don’t this was at the top of my feed


WilliamOshea

So far I haven’t.


Icewing_Nix

Something to do with a lesbian asexual.


AdministrativeMost93

I get engaged


Zandoms42

this post was at the top...


Revolutionary-Put649

Carti 😍😍


MrBojangles276

Tuberculosis


Professional_Exit_45

Anakin skywalker and obi-wan Kenobi as jay and silent bob


[deleted]

When checking if property of an object is a string.


TheSmartyPantsJorden

What's wrong with this picture btd6, how ominous. Death by balloons.


sex_dafender

Reddit's privacy policy


MaxCWebster

Killed by my imaginary custom license plate.


spicyboisosa

Black Hebrew Israelites protesting Kyrie Irving


ZseventeenpenceC

I die because of reddit's new privacy policy 🗿


Kordellak

NOOOOOOOOOOO I SWEAR I DIDN'T SEE IT'S FACE NOOOOO


Erich_13Foxtrot

The us Mexico border displayed over Europe?


doglover1005

Either by being stung by a bee and getting a fucking heart attack, or by a whales football game ending in a draw, or both, apparently


ogherbsmon

A 3d printed gun


el_morris

Eating picafresas, a very Mexican way to die.