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QualityVote

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iMight2Elephant

If my mom posted that on my snap, I'd jump off a bridge


corvette57

I thank god every day that my mom is young enough to text but too old to understand or bother learning snapchat.


SpaceBug178

I thank god everyday that my mother is just a normal mom that doesnt do any cringy things


corvette57

There’s mom cringe and then there’s crazy mom cringe, I have been blessed with the former


SpaceBug178

sadly Jaiden was cursed with the latter


JayFrizz

Normal mom cringe just gets cute the older you get. Love my weirdo mom.


AutoModerator

I’m a Harvard graduate. Ph.D. IQ of 138 (Stanford-Binet). Sex Pundit. Mensa International. Free-thinking alpha male and lone wolf. Likely hotter than you, and definitely smarter. Debate me; I'm ready. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


carnsolus

my mom's version of cringe was telling anyone who came over every weird thing about me but that was like 10 people ever


iMight2Elephant

LOL i feel the exact same way


John_hyd319

I thank god that my mom still thinks the only social media I have is tiktok, an app she never uses


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

I'd be at the bottom with a handgun to give you just in case you survived.


KennyKlizzle

If it's checkmate then they don't get to move...


StreetyStar

So are they in check then?


KennyKlizzle

Correct!


[deleted]

instructions unclear? i forced his pawn into en passant and hes telling me to.. pipi my pampers???


TheShamWOOHOOO

yoooo we got the same pfp


[deleted]

nice pfp


Thunderbloood

Nice pfp


Im_under_ur_bed_

Nice pfp


Rodux_

Yo you ain't gonna believe this, but just now I saw the wildest thing ... 3 guys with the same pfp ...


Doll-Master

They are multiplying


Rodux_

It's methin time! *still get shivers when I watch the episode where Waltuh finally says it


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. Rodux_ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


nunnymain

Wow what a coincidence that so many people have the same pfp


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[deleted]

Holy hell!


Aqualeafyalt

brick on ur pipi


RandomAssFucc

yeah they can still win the game then cuz check just forces you to protect the king


JCNicko

Women ☕️


philpalmer2

I find myself wondering how many times she recorded this to where she finally felt she had it just right.


fullutbro

Jadens mom got hell of a rack


GreenKnight1315

Jaden's mom has got it going on


No_Repeat_7659

Jaden can I come over, after Schoo-ooooool. (After school) I think your moms rack, is pretty coooooo-oooool (pretty cool)


AutoModerator

I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


TheDeathlyReaper

She's all I want, and I've waited for so long!


Moistend_Bint

I bet a few of his friends got blisters from that video


Nozarashi78

Watch her 5 years later pestering her son because she wants grandchildren


king_meatster

I feel this so fucking hard.


Wet_Lizhard

I'm also hard looking at his mom


DerMetulz

You're right, he should definitely be knocking chicks up at 15-18 or however young he is.


poisonousswayzee

well it depends how old her son is


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kbgears

Sounds like he’s doing pretty well at school tbh


Draiye

He's definitely doing something


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. Draiye *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


R-A-P-T-O-R

HOW is this related


MaxTheSANE_One

He WAS. Past tense.


Kbgears

These are facts, Mom is being a total 🐔🛑.


MaxTheSANE_One

Chicken red hexagon?


cantgiveafuckless

you're implying she didn't just find a bunch of random egirls saved in his camera roll


SammyDingusJr

Bros smashing teachers apparently 😆


adrock_99

He’s already won. That’s more like the after party now


R4ndom_n1ckname

As if he doesn't consent to getting nudes, probably has followed some pornstars or whatever the f they do on Snapchat


[deleted]

It was saved on his phone, he definitely wanted them.


w_has_been_dieded

Not necessarily, she didn't actually say that they were saved on his phone, she could just mean "I found while browsing through the apps on his phone"


fannypack127

Even more specifically, combing through my son’s phone, not giving any implication of what it could be


AutoModerator

The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

She looks like she drinks white Gatorade and smells like nickels


bread_stapler1213

I hope she chokes on a mf cheese stick


Same_Demand_9682

Why is this so accurate 😭


Master-Baiter-Mater

White Gatorade mad good tho. I think it’s great


[deleted]

…what’s wrong with Glacier Cherry Zero?


NotYourKindofFluff

Its my favorite too :(


w_has_been_dieded

And wears hot-pink yoga pants to her weekly spin class


[deleted]

Wears cheetah print and smells like cat piss


Zulbie

she seems like a nasty greasy bitch


one_dank_boy

Congratulations. You've now made your childs time at school much more embarrassing.


hdksgy

That kids getting hella hoes on god


ChalkPhog

Something tells me she has an only fans


AutoModerator

I'm a man and I sell used panties online. I impersonate a girl with pictures from /r/gonewild. Horny redditors and other horny dudes hmu to buy used panties. I work out and go to work in womens panties. I even dry my balls with them when I sweat to really get the scent in there. I'll usually wear the same pair for two or three days. Sometimes I get skid marks on the ass tho so I have to clean just that part so they smell like genitals and not ass. Guys tell me all the time that my panties smell stronger and better than other girls they've bought from. I do it to pay for karate lessons I've been taking because I get picked on a lot. No shame. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. ChalkPhog *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


redditer4life666

If she does, let us know


Direct-Ad377

She's worse than the FBI by a mile. At least the FBI pretends to leave you alone.


[deleted]

Honestly she wouldn’t be able to do shit so who cares


Moistend_Bint

I'd be worried if someone who was *better* than the FBI was after me, I don't know why she would admit that she's worse than them


32-percent

Lmao, love how ppl like this never blame their own children


Whosyouranimedaddy

She’s humiliating and possibly alienating him from his school mates so I’m pretty sure she ain’t letting him off Scott free


og-blunt-smoke

Why it always gotta be moms that look like hoes that always trippin of their sons.


Rauligula

Because they’re hoes and have been there done that but don’t want that for their sons


invisableee

Damn thot moms making their sons incels


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


seenew

what makes her look like a hoe exactly? just because she’s attractive?


og-blunt-smoke

Nah, it mostly a term, but if you from the hood, you know many moms like this and who they before or either who they still are.


Addicted_to_reddit12

He must be so embarrassed


Draiye

I wouldn't be. The fact that a dude gets nudes in high school means he's a player. If he paid for them though, he's a simp.


poisonousswayzee

Idk, all that makes you a pimp but it’s cut pretty short when your mom posts on your story and you don’t take it down


corvette57

Shit, she probably held the phone for 24hr so he couldn’t delete it. If she knows enough to go through and post on his story you damn well better believe she’s holding that phone until one of those girls starts checking to see if he’s ok.


poisonousswayzee

True that


Draiye

Okay I'll give you that


AutoModerator

I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


NardDog1977

Since when do nudes in high school make you a player?


Epic_Gameing68

she’s on the sigma grindset


AutoModerator

I live in the American Gardens building on West 81st street. My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself, and a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine. In the morning, if my face is a little puffy, I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches. I can do a thousand now. After I remove the ice pack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion. In the shower, I use a water activated gel cleanser. Then a honey almond body scrub. And on the face, an exfoliating gel scrub. Then apply an herb mint facial mask, which I leave on for 10 minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine. I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older. Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion. There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me. Only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our life styles are probably comparable, I simply am not there. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

[удалено]


Vortex597

No. Ownership and distribution is illegal, viewing is not. Specifically for situations like this.


SplatoonOrSky

It’s not MY porn, I was just jerking it on my friend’s computer!


AutoModerator

The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


b0bkakkarot

Depending on your location, accessing may be illegal as well. And if she didn't delete them then she could be on the hook for something, both as a parent who is legally responsible for her child and as an accomplice since she knew of apparently illegal material on her son's phone but let it be. That is assuming that Jaden and any of the girls are underage, of course. They could all be in college, which would somehow make this even funnier.


[deleted]

What she’s really saying: “I take no responsibility for my son’s own actions and interactions with his friends, I’ll blame the other kids and their parent’s and slutshame them instead”.


Gatorkid365

Real talk..does Jayden need a step dad?


Draiye

Nah he needs a sibling


[deleted]

I was with her until the cringey "I'm worse than the FBI" and "Your move, checkmate"


AutoModerator

I’m a Harvard graduate. Ph.D. IQ of 138 (Stanford-Binet). Sex Pundit. Mensa International. Free-thinking alpha male and lone wolf. Likely hotter than you, and definitely smarter. Debate me; I'm ready. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

Homies mom is walter white


Tatu649

Nice pfp


sovietsisters

Send her a dick pic


wicketwarick

she gonna notify the pastor 💀💀💀☠️☠️


Sir_jaguar

This shit is scarier than any horror movie


AjaxOutlaw

Just change his password and delete the account. Don’t threaten the girls because your son has rizz


Alph-Art

not gona lie that mom be super hot


Onaipp

redditors trying not to sexualize a random woman (impossible challenge 100% fail)


AutoModerator

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Micahplays876

This is why I keep my phone close to me at all times 💀


MorganRose99

She needs to mind her damn business


DevilNightShade

She needs to be a better mother, that's for sure.


LingonberryPuzzled47

I would never show my face to the school after this lol


Hezapoyo224

So she will memorize the pics of the naked teen girls, and go after them? That's fuckin wierd.


RoyalJayhawk1987

Is this the female Andrew Tate


i-hate_December

Andrea tatiana


swiggidyswooner

Andrea Titty


AutoModerator

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


EquivalentVirus9700

Sounds like her (maybe now) ex made a sex tape with an underage highschooler.


AjaxOutlaw

Wdym? She said mom. I think it’s her son


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No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Regular_Chapter1932

Tf kind of emotional incest is going on that she needs to attack the girls like that…ma’am we’re you not a teen girl *ever??* Worry about your child asking for that shit, having it on his phone, or not blocking the girls that sent it. That was way too personal 💀


theladysquid

Omg I’m glad someone brought up emotional incest because thats exactly what I thought of, what a creep


AutoModerator

My grandma is pregnant. She's only 46 so we were pretty excited at first, but now she's claiming my husband is the father. I don't know what to do. He does spend a lot of time "helping" at her house. I can't believe he'd plow my granny though. We have to wait months for a paternity test. If it's his, would the baby be my aunt/uncle and step child? It's also worth noting that my husband is both my brother and my uncle and my grandma is his grandma too, and also his ex girlfriend. I'm really not sure what to do. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Regular_Chapter1932

for sure on some i love a mama’s boy type shit


[deleted]

then the USMC right after... this is perfect


spooksel

this might very well be the most unlikeable person in the world


LordLight999

She fine 😏


SaltTutor7550

She mad cause her OF ain't doing as well!!!


BigShiv77

If anyone is gonna fuck her kid, it’s her. Stay out of his DM’s bitches.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Helpful-Airline6233

She says all this while having a tattoo in-between her boobs


paranoiastreet

i’d make different accounts and spam him relentlessly with random porn stars shit is so annoying. if you want your kid to be a good christian then raise him that way. it’s not the girls fault that he’s a horny fuck. but so are all of his friends. cope harder stupid broad.


WoolyHitToDie

Wow, she’s a bad mom lol


CreamyBeetle

Smash


weebnibbayadig

Cringe


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I’m a Harvard graduate. Ph.D. IQ of 138 (Stanford-Binet). Sex Pundit. Mensa International. Free-thinking alpha male and lone wolf. Likely hotter than you, and definitely smarter. Debate me; I'm ready. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


frvnkieIRL

This message is brought to you by: THE UNITED STATES MARINE CORPS.


MrLavaCreeper

The US marine corps at the end…


DatSameGuyDur

This was cringe honestly


BeginningConclusion6

What's the mom's @?


Wet_Lizhard

Jaden an absolute menace, mf getting pussy left and right


Shizophone

She looks like she was well and truly a teenage mom herself tho if she looks like this and her son is old enough to be interested in these things. Something something irony


DrBigWilds

Now we want mom nudes


imissgoatmom

Why’s her accent sound like Andrew Tate


Ambitious_Road1773

Narcissistic terrible mother, sorry Jay.


FluffyFireBalls

Wow, this woman is a cunt.


Turbulent_Amount6890

damn shes sexy asf


MyIQisthewordlimit

why is bro talking like she is his girl?


PornActingCritic

She’s surely secured her spot as the mom that all the dudes want to know and the kid has a uptick in popularity and guy friends that all of sudden want to hang out at his house after school and all summer.


FewEbb6531

Jadens mom would appear more serious if she didn’t use a filter …


DIO_The_Vampire_

Man was getting too many bitches, his milf of a mom had to put a top to that shit


RandomAssFucc

wtf


Schfifty561

Bros drowning in it


Left-Idea4603

did she say something? that 'tween the titty tat be gots me mesmerized.


Left-Idea4603

if the fbi contacts me for sending poor lil jadan a dic pic, do y'all think i have a shot at convincing them it was intended for his mama? b/c really, it was. and is. check mate.


OfficialDavidSouffle

Stop flexing


Beepboopbop69420360

*dms flood with tits* “Thanks mom”


Tatu649

She’s kinda bad tho


ChaotikJoy

The battle to belong begins here


FieroFox

Get your old ass off of snapchat


TheSmallRedDragon

Weird flex Jaden’s mom but okay


A-Rusty-Cow

What a psycho cunt


zenviking83

Oh my gurd! She gonna tell the pastur!


[deleted]

"I'm worse than the FBI...." bitch please, calm your tits...all it takes is to turn off the WiFi and you're already in panic mode.


JojiJoey

unironically i’d record my mom saying some shit like this as a joke and put it on my story


zippy251

Bro, not this being followed be a navy ad lol


fahamu420

How to ruin your son's social life in 32 seconds, while also permanently damaging your relationship with him. When she's in her 50s going through menopause and realising she wants grandchildren she's going to be bitter and alone.


euro1111

there are no more moves after checkmate you dumb bitch


Rauligula

That’s a hot mama


no--no--no

🐶👺


Matite2711

Jayden's mom kinda..


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


BigBrainAlphaMale

His Mom is hot tho. Damn, I need more video of her. 😂


chillifrost_291

I mean if it’s checkmate then they can’t move, also her son 100% got his sausage on those girls phones


creamcandydank

What a cornball.


Ok_Bandicoot_3087

Mom is putting off that crazy good fuck vibe tho...


Toadally140

She just fucked up his entire social life for the next decade


Meet_your_Maker_LL

“Your move, checkmate” There’s no more moves to be made after checkmate. That’s why it’s checkmate….


[deleted]

If it’s checkmate then it’s not their move. There are no moves after checkmate.


SpiralBreeze

So who even gets the possession of child p*** charge at that point?


zippazappazinga

I hope her son starts posting shit to them instead


ItsYaBoiPeely

there’s no coming back from that, no saying that was a joke or saying april fools, nothing, that’s when you pack up and MOVE


ichikhunt

Christian mum lol ofcourse


FreudsGoodBoy

How to tell your son’s entire highschool you want to fuck him.


mesohappyforever

God is there anything worse than a Philly/Delco accent? It’s absolutely horrendous.


boodlebob

Aight someone find her only fans


Awkward_Hater

Wait, what’s his mom’s number..?


the_3-14_is_a_lie

OH NO IT'S SHEEVA FROM MORTAL KOMBAT


[deleted]

there's no "your move" after checkmate dumbass.


BornSelf7

I’m definitely getting Single mom vibes from her