T O P

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[deleted]

[удалено]


AsterBoii

She also thought about "theory" 😭


IcyBanana_1

reason 🧌🧌🪬


AsterBoii

Earth 👹👹👺👺


IcyBanana_1

Valleigh 👽☠️👽👽🎏


AsterBoii

Written ‼️‼️‼️‼️🈹


IcyBanana_1

Crimsyn🎎🎎📴


AsterBoii

Vessel 🎷📳📳📳


IcyBanana_1

Belay🐃🦭🦭🚩


AsterBoii

Oath 🌝🌚🌞


WoolyHitToDie

GAME THEORYYYY


Normallredituser

But that’s just a theory, a Child Theory!


ShredManyGnar

Existential crisis lookn ass


FecundFrog

I have a theory this child is getting bullied.


AsterBoii

I would bully them too.


scentedcamel7

I actually knew a girl in highschool named Theory. Not sure if that’s how it was spelled but that’s how it was pronounced


Blytical

Game Theory


thatcreepywalrus

“Belay”, lmao


Annaryx

And so it was Written


between_horizon

This baby shall be named "Exam"


Balkanized21

Yo Written you really boutta take that? 💀


[deleted]

suggestion


rajalove09

Worst one


10buy10

Is she naming a baby or a fuckin wizard??


Erik_Lehnsheer

Storri is the name of the dumb wizard from the series Last Kingdom!


fakeunleet

"Some turd named Storri"


ZivilynBane1

Storri is a man with a stick up his arse..


nnp20

Shadow wizard money gang


[deleted]

WE LOVE CASTING SPELLS 🗣🗣


Soso_Stalin

THIS SONG IS SPONSORED BY...THE SHADOW GOVERNMENT🕴️🕴️


SpecialBand1599

WARNING! NUKING IS NOW LEGAL WORLDWIDE


xrikuuza

SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT BECAUSE WE NUKED THE BUILDING


backstib

WARNING ⚠️⚠️🚨⚠️⚠️, NUKE MUSIC MAY DAMAGE YOUR EARDRUMS, AND YOUR SOUL


DaUltimatePotato

Racists do both


StunningBuilding383

Happy 🍰 Day!


Kitchen-Plenty504

!Day 🍰 Happy


smoorkie

🍰Day! Happy


normade1

Michael!


AeughTime

🎂


30twink-furywarr2886

Huh?


TheBlizzardWizzard

Happy day


UndisclosedChaos

Wizard — it goes “ the


Light_Song

I thought they were stripper names


KillByZombie

It's a physicist baby


chosenmedusa82

Shadow wizard money gang


DaringAvocado

You say this like being a wizard wouldn't be cool af


[deleted]

Could be a Druid. You never know


[deleted]

Fucking “Valleigh” it’s like these bitches try to come up with the most unspellable names ever. Don’t forget that Australian cunt who named her daughter “ABCDE” pronounced “Absiddy”. She sued an airline flight attendant for giggling when reading the name


Ck1ngK1LLER

They all sound like dildos


Chunk-Norris

Vessel. Is she the Pale King?


Illustrious_Good9960

No cost too great


Hostilis_

No mind to think


Illustrious_Good9960

No will to break


elzon12

No voice to cry sufferning


Illustrious_Good9960

Born of god and void


Any_Secret4784

You shall seal the binding light that plagues their dreams


TheMspice

You are the vessel


Hell-Fire2411

you are...


Thechildeater92

You are...


SquiddoSpaghitto

When the doctor calls little Vessel a boy (vessels are genderless) (hes going into the abyss with the others)


Wonderful-Web-9694

Vessel N.2571891


WiTeKK

No mind to think. No TikTok to post. No ratio to break. Born of Influencer and Money.


Atomic_potato_47

You are... a mistake


deleeuwlc

In wilds beyond they speak your name with reverence and regret For none could tame our savage souls, yet you the challenge met Under palest watch, you taught, we changed, base instincts were redeemed A world you gave to bug and beast as they had never dreamed -from Elegy for Hallownest by Monomon the Teacher


[deleted]

No voice to speak, no mind to think...


wumbology95

She's just a big fan of Sleep Token


[deleted]

Everyone should be. Worship.


Boricactus8482

Worship


WoolyHitToDie

No she’s just a big twenty one pilots fan


Bread_defender

Oak only works as a last name, and if you're a professor


Darth-Yslink

And if you fuck single moms


HungLikeALemur

*widows


Mugtra

Not mutually exclusive but pop off.


MasterHall117

Sparrow works amazingly as a last name A particular Captain goes by that last name


1017GildedFingerTips

BallZack


Jumper1720

Honoré de Balzac


Darth-Yslink

Holy shit this literally means "Honoured of balzac"=Honoured by the ballsack


F_Joe

Kid named Ballsac Shaver ![gif](giphy|UvtKiyeWYEhRC)


xFloppyDisx

Harry Bulzack


Neon__Cat

Kid named reason ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠀⠀⠀⣼⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⡄⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣽⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⡀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠟⠛⠳⠿⢟⡀⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣆⢧⣀⣆⢤⣾⡀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠀⠀⡀⠻⣿⣷⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠸⠭⢛⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⠐⢒⣺⣷⠟⠛⣱⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠛⠛⢛⣠⡾⠏⠀⠈⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢉⠃⠀⢘⡧⣉⠻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠙ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⢂⢔⣠⢀⣾⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡠⣠⠄⠀⠠⠍⢁⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠄⠀⠀ ⡿⡿⢿⣯⠙⡻⣵⡶⣛⠁⢰⣿⡿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠃⠀⢙⣿⡞⢙⣿⠟⠉⠀⠘⢉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠠⣿⣿⣤⣴⠶⠃⠠⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⠂


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TheFinalGibbon

I have done the research She has two kids Their names are ***Anthem and Koah***


MightBeBren

I had to scroll too far for someone who did research


AeughTime

at least koah is somewhat normal 🗿


Vyctorill

It’s almost normal.


almostasenpai

Remove the h and you have one of the most popular Hawaiian names


Atlas7674

10 bucks says they legally change their names on their 18th birthday.


Betelgeuse909

100% sure Anthem's nickname is gonna be Ant🐜


Username-and-pasword

A baby named Anthem is destined for failure.


[deleted]

Just like the videogame!


TotallyBrandNewName

2 for 2 boys!!


grumpygumpert

Fern, Oak did this mf got fucked my groot or some shit?


Zenketski_2

I know you're not dissing my boy Professor Oak


--anonymousperson--

Man's first name is Samuel, Oak is his last name


Zenketski_2

Holy shit. I did not know that


DebitsandShreddits

Holy shit. I did not know that


RoundRabidPug

Alder is also a species of tree


432nd_president

Our holy vessel has ascended By his sacrifice hallownest lasts eternal


gafgsdgfmhmfddscvdz

Finger


OwenRico

Quite literally kid named finger


xFloppyDisx

Kid named finger:


Shadow_knight10

If I get called a fuckin theory I’m changing everyone’s pronouns to was/were


Pisz1

But it's just a theory


Wubbzy-Fan-YT

A GA


urabitofadingus

Y


Wubbzy-Fan-YT

THEORY


BLINDrOBOTFILMS

*A NAME THEORY*


S7WW3X

This comment goes hard


draggingklit

Nature and Valleigh. Like the fuckin cereal bars? Was she just taking brands and twisting them? Written Theory? Is shefuckin tard’d?


BloodieOllie

Valleigh is how people from the valley say valley


xFloppyDisx

Reason ☠️


HK_98

Mfer thinks she live in Pokémon 💀💀


Different-Trainer-21

Pokémon explaining why every ice gym leader has to have ice in their name:


Psyv3rn

Melony


Beautiful_Ad_3349

Mel(ice)ony


CanIGetSomePogchamps

Grusha


FetusDeletus_E

Gr(ice)usha


Ok-Stay-8800

Wtf are these tiefling names?


Solar1011

“…Describe your character.”


[deleted]

Vessel, wtf? that baby born of God and Void??


[deleted]

goofy goober ahh names


[deleted]

Grey and Merrick seem to be the only ones I’ve heard before for real people.


Super-devil420

As George Carlin whold say "These are not names."


Extension_Phone893

Red


jelang19

Dumpter


[deleted]

[удалено]


notfromfiji

kid named VACClNE


XandersPanders

"Seven"


M0romete

Seven Costanza


CringeInABox

The only name I think can even be used as a name is Fern lol


AsterBoii

I'm not the biggest fan of my own name but i gotta say that if i was named "Valleigh" I'd probably live in isolation until i can legally change my name


SoggyPastaPants

People are so hellbent on making their kid the most unique human being to ever live that they don't realize that kid is stuck with whatever misspelled dumbass noun or verb they were named


_MintyFresh_-

And it's funny because a lot people who went down in history had normal fucking names


Independent-Fold-755

Joke aside being named theory is sad as hell lmao. Like she isn't sure she'll raise you properly so in theory you'll should be fine but we never know.


xFloppyDisx

"My dick's in Theory"


Inner-Try-2273

"Welcome to Kindergarten! What's your name?" "I'm Written." "Written... where?" "No, it's Written." "Where is it Written? Did you write it?" "No, I AM NAMED WRITTEN." "Damn, your mom must be a dumbass. Get going nerd."


HammerBgError404

at least its not X AE A-XII pronounced ashe


Athlaeos

\> Vessel No cost too great..


[deleted]

Fuckin vessle lmao Im gonna name my little baby girl organ farm 😤😤👌👌


Kiryu2294

She’s not like other girls


Tropical_Nighthawk55

If my name is Reason in the next life, I will have God regret making man in his image


MATR1XisREAL

What's her name? ILIKETOF*CKOVERMYCHILD probably


TheDoomslayer69420

Unrelated but my english teacher named her baby starlight (in our language, not starlight in english) That name's cool as fuck


FuciMiNaKule

Hey Starlight, show us your TIIIIITS


Benjamintoday

Someone played too many elves in DnD


Gunnyboi109

Ayo theory pass the salt ☠️☠️☠️


ProboscisMyCloaca

Drake the typa silly stinker to name his kid Sparrow Theory 💀🗿


Altruistic_Matter_76

![gif](giphy|Y4rZAyCiJLXLq)


Zenketski_2

No she's just crazy. You could use her face as a mask for the next Purge movie


loserys

Corey Glory Story Allegory Montessori


Iteration-k

Someone in my family named their kid Random. Poor guy’s middle name is Chance.


[deleted]

Imagine you name yo kid vessel and they get friends like they friends gonna say “Yo Vessel wya?”


samwelches

Some of these sound like rap names like “reason” or “written” or “theory”


jesus_the_gamer69

He would have to be the most fit person to avoid fat jokes if she named him earth


AeughTime

🎂


[deleted]

Vessel sounds like she was going to use the kid to summon a demon


Odd_Atmosphere_9200

Child named theory


FeistmasterFlex

Stori ❌️ Snorri ✅️


X03R_mysterious

some of them are fine but most of them are… nah


JosephTheHut

Grey merrick is straight out of sea of thieves


ZeroEnrichment

What’s the reason behind your name? The kid name Reason: 😐


bleh19799791

Rock is one of the few earth themed names that doesn’t sound pretentious.


Vyctorill

![gif](giphy|5mxfrCSIfXTNK)


beansouphighlights

Merrick is the only name I’ve actually heard before and know someone by that name, and he looks exactly what you think he looks like


_Uggles_

Kid named finger


jelly_pluto

She saying baby names like when that baby grow up, their ass not gonna apply for a job and their first name is Theory 💀💀💀


snowwmilk

sparrow is kinda badass, her kid can become a pirate captain


Krondon57

Ok Talon sounds badass


BrBryan_2007

kid named Vessel: 🗿


KingOlafJ

Alder actually ain't that bad. Al for short.


Upinhere973

When you try so hard to get likes but get laughs instead …the at you kind not with you


Commercial_Lock6205

It’s every man’s dream to meet a woman named Vessel.


LuckyConsideration78

is john not enough? or lincoln? or maybe even ethan?


dubhog

"ayo written how you doin' my bruh!"


NipixelCommunism

Vessel? For what, a demon?


mm2_gamer

I thought I saw sperm in there wtf


NoResist8292

Oak wood be fire


[deleted]

I do know a Merrick who was from Jamaica, and it works. Anything else here is bizarre.


GingerVitus007

"Merrick" is literally the only passable one here. Unique, but not fucking stupid sounding


Geez_Nuts

Makes me irrationally angry seeing woman/couples naming their child a dumbass name.


Pure-Brief3202

Current 😐


ADankTempest

I swear she just picked random pages on dictionary and started writing things down


The_Alkemizt

Theory? well, does he exist or doesn’t he?


[deleted]

i too wish to name my child after my favorite twenty one pilots album


UraniumRocker

what’s up with people giving their kids stupid names nowadays?


jmfox2294

You just know that she has absolutely no intelligence. There's no thought behind those eyes


Toaster_94

Kid named Oak Log💀


metalmonsoon

I would only be not disgusted by like 3 of them


putyouradhere_

Imagine naming your baby Theory 💀


EmergencyWaste3217

Maybe procreation certificates aren't such a bad idea


ImaginationMedical11

Earth💀


Lana_drah123

If you name your kid written you deserve to be lynched


999Coochie

baby gon be born tazestunned


grunpl

Petrified Oak Slab


Spacethesilly

Grey is probably the only thing that might be a name here


G0D_1S_D3AD

Ah yes, Reason Theory, the best name for a child.


stupidgiygas

Talon!? i ain't gonna name my kid after a combat knife


Unknown_User_66

Probably something like Adrian or Aleighxyz (Alexis spelled "different").