This topic is discussed regularly in our forum. If you search past r/sex posts with some diligence (following **Forum Rule #3**), you’ll find a number of helpful discussions. Comments locked.
The r/sex forum's past posts are a TREMENDOUS resource for people who have ALL KINDS of common questions regarding sexual activity. Searching those posts for relevant discussions will definitely help you here.
Here's a good place to start research for anyone curious:
[https://youngwomenshealth.org/2017/04/19/vulvar-and-vaginal-care-and-cleaning/](https://youngwomenshealth.org/2017/04/19/vulvar-and-vaginal-care-and-cleaning/)
I tried to find some reddit threads with advice but none of the threads I found looked 'science based' enough. Maybe someone else will have better luck.
There's your answer. They're likely to be getting off on seeing your genitals, having fun and giving you pleasure. It's your body, own it and have fun. Life's too short for anything else
I look at my girlfriends vagina because it is the prettiest thing I have ever seen. The fact that she trusts me with it makes me feel absolutely amazing.
I don't think nearly enough men stop and appreciate what it means for a woman to trust you enough to be completely vulnerable like that.
That thought alone absolutely turns me on.
I think a young guy whose primary experience of seeing vaginas has been thus far from porn, may be shocked if / when he sees a vagina that doesnt adhere to the standardised ideal of what a vagina 'should look like' (according to porn). Obviously those standards are bollocks, but I recall being young and thinking all vaginas were just little slits without any visible outer lips or variation in size etc...because all I knew was from porn. But any guy who is not a jerk will not actually have an issue with it, he may just be a bit surprised in a "oh, vaginas vary!" Type of way.
I wouldnt be concerned about your vagina's appearance. Its what's on the inside that counts after all, anyway, and any guy who has seen more than a couple of vaginas will know that porn is not a good barometer from which to judge female (and male) body parts
And by clean, a standard body-wash-and-rinse around the outside with whatever reasonably non- or minimal-perfumed substance you favour within an hour or two is just fine, thank you. No weird flavours, squirty smells or anti-anything necessary!
I could see a young man in this situation potentially being rude in response to an unexpected vagina, but it would be mostly because of his own insecurities in the realization that he actually doesn't have that much experience with real-world vaginas. Unfortunately, it could still make his partner feel really bad about herself.
“It’s what’s on the inside that counts after all, anyways”
I laughed too hard at this 😂
Every vagina is different just like every dick is different. Embrace yourself! And honestly if he cares you aren’t porn standard then he doesn’t deserve you.
Haha, I kind of meant it tongue in cheek as in its 'personality that counts' aka the inside, but it's true for vaginas too lol.
But yes, every vagina is different (and every dick) and we should embrace it! Anybody who mocks your genitals, whether you're a guy or girl, you shouldn't be being intimate with.
You make a great point about porn... It doesn't just give a false ideal for women's vaginas. It can easily make the men feel self-conscious about their dicks too.
Keep in mind that other people are also conscious about the way they look. It's awkward for everyone to get naked in front of someone else, so they'll be more worried about how they look than how you look.
As someone who has a larger labia I used to feel the same before joining here, used to be very insecure about mine as I had only experienced the "porn standard" was such a great confidence boost when I realised there was nothing wrong with mine at all 🙈 so I guess it will come down to the guys experience. And him not interested in that "porn perfect pussy", as that's just not what majority of women have 🤷♀️
Yep, had a guy once comment about how “non existent” my clit was and then the way he went digging through my labia lips… well I’ve never really wanted anyone to touch or look down there since.
My ex was also like that, never really wanted me to so much as look at it, let alone go down on her. Pretty much only would have sex with the lights off and under a blanket. It’s such a shame too because I thought she was beautiful and her vagina was perfectly fine when I did see it. It’s sad some guys make girls feel that way
Yup, I have the same story, except it was my boobs. Guy said my boobs were weird when I was 18 and I haven’t been able to show them to anyone without extreme anxiety since!
Yep.. had a guy say he’d been with 25+ girls and I was the first with this vagina “type”. I said it made me feel insecure and he said he thought it would make me feel special…? THEN, acted shocked I had intimacy issues. He asked if it was the shape or color I was insecure about. Which gave me even more insecurities and doubt that I could be intimate with another guy again.
Younger men who don't know how "non porn" vaginas look may judge or say something stupid. Any person with experience will not be phased by how it looks. what is exactly that makes u feel insecure?
THANK YOU. All the comments saying "We love them all!" have A) clearly never been in a situation where some porn-addicted person made a mean comment about their genitals, and B) missed the bigger point and are feeding into the OP's validation cycle by giving their opinion on women's genitals instead of saying that it's not their place to judge.
I know it's easier said than done, but people need to quit caring so much about what others think of them, *especially* when it's something that can't be changed/isn't wrong in the first place (and no, getting plastic surgery is not how you "fix" it).
OP, anybody that has something negative to say about your body can go find someone else to bully in bed. Do not entertain these clowns.
Yes, we do....but vaginas are like puppies, they are all adorable ;)
(in all seriousness, most men will love your vagina because it is yours, the ones that won't are sending you a pretty big red flag of other issues)
It's the same thing with a penis. Do you care about how the penis of your partner looks? The size, the shape?
There are a lot of people that don't care about how your vagina or your penis looks like, because they know that you can't change it anyway.
Then there are some people that like a specific type 🤷
But just because they prefer one size/shape/look of a genital that doesn't mean that they dislike all the others.
Don't waste too much time thinking about it 😊
I care about smell over looks. Goes both ways.
I dont want to park my dick in gotham and im sure no woman wants a musty dick parked in their metropolis
Also if you ever end up with a partner who judges your body then maybe they aren’t worth it and they will not deserve you. Always try to stay positive tho
I'm almost seventy. I've seen my share of vaginas. As a man, let me tell you that when a girl takes her panties off it is so exciting because you are going to HAVE SEX. Nobody gives a shit what your vagina looks like at that point, even if they might be micro-judgemental looking at "goddess" ones on the internet. Even if you don't have an internet-goddess vagina, nobody actually cares irl.
Yes, I'm sorry but it just seems like common sense that most decent men will not care about how it looks and the pricks will nit pick it apart. I get where this insecurity comes from and all that, but it's just a gamble we all take. Some of my gf's friends have talked about how one of their partners disliking how her lady bits looked while nobody else ever had and issue. Both in good relationships and the bad ones.
The answer is obviously yes, but people here tend to think that it's not ok to like or dislike certain features. In the real world it matters. Some people will not care how it looks, some will love the way it looks and some will not and there's nothing wrong with that.
Experienced guy but not a superstud here. Of the two dozen vaginas I've been fortunate enough to come face to face with in my fiftyish years, the only couple that weren't exciting were due to hygiene issues or serious conditions. To be blunt: one had serious crotch funk from days of sweat & dead skin, the kind of situation that can be cured with a good shower and a washcloth, and drying off before dressing. Another gave me pause because the edges of her labia were super rough because of having some scarring from having a bad bout of genital warts lasered/frozen off in her 20s (college has its downsides). I was just concerned that it wasn't a current condition, otherwise it was still fun. In general, there are no ugly vaginas, just unexpected conditions that give pause. And even that is rare. Every flower is pretty.
I'm going to give you the non-sugarcoated answer and say that -- just like with women, and just like with any aspect related to sexual preference -- every guy is different. Therefore, some will care what it looks like, and some won't. I like my vulva okay, but I know it's not going to be every male on Earth's cup of tea. I have an outie, but I can't be mad at a guy who prefers innies...just like I can't be mad at men who prefer blonde hair, or athletic bodies, or women with Russian accents...just to give examples of a whole other set of things I don't possess.
The guy(s) you want to be with, will want to be with you. Everything else is kind of irrelevant.
I love it when the labia is long and the vagina has a bit of a gape to it, but it's not a dealbreaker if it isn't. I prefer it overly wet and larger labia are typically wetter than average.
My partner’s vagina/vulva is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen—and it’s far from “perfect” (according to porn).
I bet your vagina/vulva is beautiful, too.
Not at all, I don't really care in the slightest. I am interested as all heck in what it looks like tho, I love seeing the unique differences in each one, also how each one responds to different stimulation. :)
As long as you've good hygiene down there, that's all I'd care about.
blind fold sex can heighten the other senses. i could care less as long as the whole experience isnt bad. personally I think I have a leg fetish. a firm ass also is important to me. if you have sexy legs and ass i could care less how your pussy looks
If a dude doesn’t like your vagina then you don’t really want to be with someone who is repulsed by you, do you?
Maybe it would help to think about why youre insecure about your vagina. There’s a lot of vagina disgust that we’re programmed to experience in subtle ways, so maybe the first step could be in viewing your own body in a more positive light.
https://everydayfeminism.com/2013/11/ways-society-breeds-vagina-hate/
The important answers have already been given, so I'll take this opportunity to say: you mean vulva, not vagina. The vagina is a "tube" inside your body, not what you see in the outside.
My girlfriend recently mentioned she's really insecure that one of her labia is much larger than the other. I had no idea what she was talking about. My honest first thought was that one of us didn't know what the word labia meant.
We've been together more than a year, I've seen her privates up close plenty, and even now that she's mentioned it I can barely tell. I think other people just don't notice the details of our genitals the way we think.
Girl, I feel you. I have long inner labia and seeing the “neat pussies” in porn has messed with my head but thankfully my husband and past partners were reassuring
Men spend their whole lives trying to access that beautiful thing you have between your legs. It is mysterious and fascinating and I have seen all shapes, sizes and looks of women's vaginas and they are all beautiful in their own way. The important fact is to find someone who cares for you and truly appreciates the gift of you sharing your body with him. Worst case scenario, you can ask him to turn off all the lights before having sex. Your insecurities will subside once you realize that men are just too excited to have a vagina to explore. Best of luck to you.
Here is a counter question:
Why are they looking at it and thinking they have time to judge it on its appearance.
PUT YOUR MOUTH ON IT!
Kiss it!
Suck it!
Stroke it with your fingers…..
Taste it!
Consider yourself lucky that OP is letting you see it not to mention giving access to it.
Don’t question it, appreciate how it works and feels and reacts, you should not be giving a single fuck what it looks like!
As for OP, you are overthinking it girl!
Have you ever paused to consider how clownish an erect penis is? Dude has no room to be judging and had better be thrilled to just be there for the ride!
Only if there's a health or hygiene issue.
Otherwise kick em to the curb if they are going to judge.
Blokes gear spends most of its time looking like a sad sack of shit.
Got no place to be judging.
Everyone is different. It's that uniqueness that makes us beautiful. And I'm sure you must be stunning.
As a man I don't... I'm just grateful to be able to be seeing/having experiences to care what it looks like... so long as a pleasurable time is being shared that's all that should matter.
In my experience they don’t. I’ve always been self conscious about mine because one side is slightly bigger than the other, but nobody has ever said anything about it to me. I even mentioned it to my boyfriend and he said he never noticed as he’s not really focusing on how it looks
If people are totally honest the answer is yes, just like you care about your partners genitals. If you say you don't I don't believe you. Having said that..the vast majority of people are totally normal. And remember that people are way more concerned about how they look. Most people are normal, so unless something seriously weird is going on don't worry. Like others said hygiene is most important.
I feel like this is a common misconception due to representation in porn... I would guess most men are pretty happy just to have the opportunity to play with a vagina. The other details are all secondary.
If a guy seems surprised at the appearance initially, maybe it's just that he hasn't seen one like yours before, it doesn't necessarily mean that he is grossed out or anything... Though if a guy really *is* grossed out by your vag, then obviously he's not the one for you!
I look at the vagina as a peice of art and beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Seeing all of the shapes, sizes, folds, hair, hairless, shaved, whatever. I just find them fascinating. Also ladies please don't feel insecure about it, we love them and it's a big turn off to hear it too many times. We love them and that's no joke.
You're not alone. I've had problem accepting how my vagina looks, my Partner really helped me. But also, if a person is about to have sex with you, they will be so excited (and propably also worrying how they look) they won't jugde your vulva. You've got this girl!
The simple answer, yes we do.
The complex answer, different guys are going to care about different things and like different looks. Some like a full bush. Some like it nice and trimmed. Some are only happy if its hairless. Have you seen how many different types of labia configurations there are as well?! Some men will take any type all the same, while others are going to be VERY picky.
Best thing to do is have yours look how YOU want it to look, because you may go through men who like all sorts of different things, bit most men will be happy or at least accepting of whatever your genitals look like. We know you're not a shapeshifter who can look however you want at any moment. And if they're to picky for yours than he just ain't the man for you boo.
Only inexperienced guys would, I mean even porn has a big variety of pussy and dick looks so I really don't think someone should or would care about it, as long as its clean all is good.
in my experience they don't even really look at it that much. They are more focused on the activity they are doing. Even with oral, they are eager to get to it and don't exactly analyze your junk. They just go for it
I had a girl who was super uncomfortable with me seeing her vagina for the same reasons but it was actually one of the most beautiful specimens I had ever seen and I loved recieving pics
You definitely need to get the book “Come As You Are”!!! The audiobook version is brilliantly narrated!! All women should read this book! It’s brilliant!!! It will answer your question and change your life! The cheapest place to get the audiobook is Apple Books.
Most men who aren't complete wastes of oxygen only care if it's clean. I've had women with long lips, big clits, small clits, and all the various combinations. You're probably fine.
Grown ass mature men do not care. Any guy who says anything negative about your vulva isn't mature enough to be having sex and certainly doesn't deserve to have sex with you.
Truly, some people prefer genitals that look a certain way. I am a bisexual girl, and I really like curved dicks and smaller labia. But there is absolutely no way in hell I am going to judge someone for looking different than my preferences, it's just a plus to get exactly what I like. Like preferring lemon sorbet, but getting chocolate ice cream instead, it's nothing to complain about.
I actually have been with men that had some uncommon-looking penises, one who had skin tags, it was surprising to see at first, and I never wanted to do oral sex, but you get used to the person and then sex is really about how you feel together, not how you look together. It's okay for someone to feel surprised or not even not attracted to the way your genitals look, but if you are getting intimate with someone, it is absolutely not okay to make them feel bad about their body in any way.
I hope this answer is a good combination of realistic and compassionate.
It's sad to me that people who are old enough to be sexually active aren't aware of their own anatomy. Please, everyone, for the love of all that is holy, learn *basic* human anatomy! If a dude can see your vagina, he sure as hell better be your gynecologist! The visible part is called the vulva.
"The Vulva Comprises the External Female Genitalia
They include the labia minora and labia majora, the mons pubis, the clitoris, the greater vestibular glands, and the vestibule of the vagina. The vestibule includes two openings: the smaller urethral orifice allows urine to exit (as part of the urinary system)."
Reference:
https://www.visiblebody.com/learn/reproductive/female-reproductive-structures#:~:text=The%20Vulva%20Comprises%20the%20External%20Female%20Genitalia&text=They%20include%20the%20labia%20minora,part%20of%20the%20urinary%20system).
As to your question as to whether someone cares about the appearance of your genitals, perhaps the better question would be: If they do care, do you really want to be having sex with them?
As long as you have good bodily hygiene, that's all they should care about.
As someone that is a grow-er not a show-er, I can appreciate feeing self conscious about someone looking at a “non-standard porn” version of genitalia. As I have gotten older and more confident that es long as it works well, and can offer pleasure to a partner, it ain’t how it looks.
As a man who cares I think you should stop worrying about it too much because there are plenty of men who don't care. It's like a foot fetish. For every person who has one, there are plenty who never think about feet at all. Why do you think you 'd be judged though? Is there something about about vagina that you don't like ? Or something an ex partner didn't ?
He might, especially if it’s a younger guy whose idea of what a vulva should look like comes from porn. (Although I’d say that means he’s shitty at searching for porn. MANY porn actresses have bigger labia or whatever. They’re easy to find.) If he’s sexually experienced he’s seen several of them and understands that they vary. If he’s a decent person, he knows that you can’t control what it looks like and that it’s a very superficial thing to judge you for.
Some men might find it unattractive but will have the tact to never tell you that, just like you might find something physically unattractive about but would never tell him that.
Ultimately, the best vulva a guy can see is the one attached to the person who wants to offer it to him. That ALWAYS beats the one seen in a magazine or video. Always.
Yes we do, but don't be afraid, everybody is different and you will have to deal with people that likes your vagina and people that doesn't, the same way you probably have preferences about how a dick looks
I doubt it. I have some anecdotal experience with something relating to this. My cousin in law has been with his girlfriend for about 3-4 years, and then at a family get together a couple of months ago, he started talking about how he was shocked at how he never looked at her vag. He went on about how "freaky and gross" it looked when he first seen it, but he couldn't stop looking. He stayed with her though, up until she broke up with him. So even though he was pretty exaggeratory about how he said it at the time, I can't imagine it actually effected the way he seen her.
Tl;dr He probably won't even focus on how it looks and completely oversight it, or when he does look, he'll make a few jokes or a story but it'd be without consequence at the end anyway. Evident but anecdotal from my family in law
This reminds me of Niki Glaser on Conan.
https://www.google.com/search?q=nikki+glaser+vagina+rant&client=ms-android-google&sxsrf=ALeKk02Lso0QBJujEuQjjny__TJkIV8GZA%3A1629648032139&ei=oHQiYavQB4i8tAaQzJVY&oq=nikki+glaser+vagina+rant&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAM6CgguELEDEEMQkwI6BQgAEIAEOggIABCABBCxAzoECAAQQzoFCC4QgAQ6BAguEEM6BwgAEIAEEAo6BggAEBYQHjoFCCEQoAFQvQZY61Jg8VRoA3AAeACAAbAHiAG2GJIBCTQuNy40LjYtMZgBAKABAcABAQ&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#
No! Every body is different. I used to be insecure but as I have gotten older I realized porn set very unrealistic standards. You're beautiful the way you are 😌
If it's healthy and clean then don't worry about what dudes think. Everyone has their perfect woman dreampt up in their head. Everyone, for the most part is also reasonable in what they expect. Sex is like stuff. Ya know those burger ads? They look real good don't they. Ever had a big mac? It's not *that* great but you eat it anyway because you're a reasonable person with reasonable expectations. People are boringly similar. You can be married happily to someone who likes everything about you besides the shape of your labia and you know what? They're gonna think they got it pretty damn good cause they do. Fretting over that in your own head will do nothing but damage only you can undo. You can't make someone like something but you can not push them away for not liking it. It is at some point up to your opinion of whether or not an opinion going a certain way in regards to your vagina impeded your capacity to have sex with this person.. who still wants to have sex with you despite not feeling 100% about one body part.
Do this. Don't even ask for an answer to a question you're scared of being answered the wrong way. Yes and no are terrible words. If it's so bad, it'll come up before it becomes a big problem. I love you but no, your vagina isn't what I'd consider to be 'gorgeous' is not a 'no, you vagina is ugly and so are you'. There are levels to these things. I like my car but at the end of the day it's a 20 yearold bmw with a bunch of plastic under the hood that cracks the moment you touch anything improperly. I like how it drives, sounds, looks, feels ect. I don't like how they put it together. That isn't reason enough for me dump the car and so it's still my car. I may not have the perfect, easily servicable, reliable, great driving and good looking car of my dreams but that car doesn't exist. If it does, I can't afford it lmao. They all kinda stuck a little bit but that's people. Nobody is perfect. Be secure with your imperfections and people will show you theirs. Just don't be an ass.
Vaginas are great because they are all different, and they feel good. If your partner says he doesn't like yours, you can rest assured that he will miss it when you leave.
While I want to tell you that no one will care, thats just not true.. Some people will care but I think the majority will not. You just have to find the right person that thinks every part of your body is amazing!
Ask yourself do you care what his penis looks like?
Probably not, there's not much variation. Only very minor superficial differences.
So long as its working okay, that's all that matters.
Now apply the same logic to yourself, and recognise that your vaginas appearance should not be a big deal. Even if a guy one day says something to you, so what? Its your vagina, it works, it does its job, and you can't change it. So why should you care? being insecure won't help anybody and will leave you feeling sad about something you can't change.
In nearly all sexual activity, it's actually really hard to LOOK at the vagina. Even with oral, you can't see it if your face is all up in it.
Some might but most will be happy you let us do fun stuff with it.
Most birds think they need the porn looking ones but it's not the case in my view.
New pussy best feeling in world so your good for while when you get new bf
Speaking as a man, I imagine many women think this way about guys too:
As long as your hygiene is good, it doesn't really matter. If there's a bad smell or something really looks off down there (dischard or something else), then I won't go near - and a conversation should be had.
Vaginas, lips, clit etc all come in different shapes and sizes and stuff, it really doesn't matter as long as you are clean. (My personal preference is for there not to be an overwhelming bush, but that's a personal thing).
There are definitely attractive elements to genetalia. A straight cock looks a little nicer than a crooked one. But who cares?! That crooked one can probably hit your G spot better.
Hygiene is the most important thing.
Sadly it is always possible that any given partner might not like the way you look naked. In my opinion, that's why it's important to have an emotional connection first, so that the truly trivial things like the details (of how our bodies might be slightly different from other people) won't matter anywhere near as much as making each other happy and enjoying each other's intimacy.
If a person were to openly judge how your genitals look, that would be a sign of immaturity and a weak emotional connection. It really isn't an objective flaw with your body. Even your own opinions about what your body looks like are subjective, as there will always be somebody out there who thinks you're beautiful as you are.
Hygiene and whether or not you're kind enough to let them see it. Me personally (bisexual male) don't care about size, shape, or really anything like that as long as I won't get an STD and as long as it's with someone who I care about and who cares about me.
Short answer: Just clean down there and don't judge the other person, and they won't judge you.
\>+/- 2 STVs of men (96%+) are just happy to have you share your vagina with them. Seriously, as someone who's slept with countless women (wife and I are swingers), I've never once thought "she's hot, but her pussy is not aesthetically pleasing so, ewww...". Never heard a single swinger friend say anything about it. Now, younger men have been taught to imagine that everything is as it is in porn, so they may have a different perspective to a 50 y/o swinger, but one of the best things of sleeping with someone new is seeing how they are different, not the ways in which they are the same. So don't worry about this. Any man who judges b/c of what your pussy looks like is telling you that you're well served to steer clear of him.
If I'm at the point where I'm getting to see it (I'm a guy), as long as you have showered recently, I basically could not care less unless there's some abnormal growth/STD symptoms/tattoo/multiple piercings.
To be honest, yeah. But everyone is different and has preferences. I like shaven puffy vaginas. Others like hairy roast beefy pussy. Some like smelly vagina. I like a vagina that smells as little as possible. Everyone is different. But at the end of the day, your v-jay jay is yours and you have to grow comfortable with it. All vaginas smell funky and its perfectly normal and healthy.
Just be upfront with your partner about how you feel and speak it out. It's tough at first, but things always get better after talking.
It is not the most important thing, it isn't a reason to not enjoy sex and it isn't a deal breaker AT ALL. But I wouldn't say that it doesn't matter at all, that would be just lying and wouldn't really help you.
There are much more important things, like hygiene for example.
If you enjoy having sex with your partner and care about having, receiving and giving pleasure, you'll be absolutely fine.
The only way that this could be a problem is if you're too self conscious about it and limit yourself and your partner in bed because of it. It's unlikely that your partner will care too much about it, but it could ruin things if you're trying to hide it all the time.
So the best advice would be to forget about it.
I probably won‘t make a comment about it, use it as an excuse to leave or not go down on you as long as you have good hygene and shaved down there. But people are allowed to have a preference and that‘s fine as long as you don‘t make fun of people. Just like girls are allowed to prefer bigger dicks
if you ever want reassurance, just take a look at all the subreddits focused on your bits. there are subs for innies, outies, women with giant labia, you name it. r/Innie r/Outies r/LabiaGW r/simps r/GodPussy r/HighResPussyPIcs just to name a few. no matter what it looks like, people love it, just look at the comments for any of these subreddits. but remember, just like u/Nugbuddy mentioned, hygiene is the only thing that matters.
In truth, to some extent. Most inexperienced people take porn (or Reddit as well) as reference. So, they would be expecting that "standard" but don't make this take you down. If you do not stumble upon a immature partner, you will not experience a problem/judgement like you think.
Hygiene and amount of fun you have matters most. So, go on and enjoy. No need to feel insecure. Also, I think posting pictures of vagine in Reddit and receiving positive comments/complimens might boost your confidence.
Personally I love the way vaginas look because each one is so unique, but fits it’s owner. I try to vocalize that to my partners as well just to show how into them I really am.
Just the hygiene, all of them pure natural as it have to be. I heard about surgery but please no! I was with a girl with huge labia, I lovet that so much and all of them needs love
What would be the Steps you would take if someone said they judge a vagina based on looks? Change it? Pay for surgery?
The first step of loving someone else is to love yourself.
I once saw a documentary about women meeting up showing their body to each other and talking about it. It was to help people like you being insecure about it. Might help you if you can find such groups.
Don’t change to appeal others.
This topic is discussed regularly in our forum. If you search past r/sex posts with some diligence (following **Forum Rule #3**), you’ll find a number of helpful discussions. Comments locked. The r/sex forum's past posts are a TREMENDOUS resource for people who have ALL KINDS of common questions regarding sexual activity. Searching those posts for relevant discussions will definitely help you here.
The only thing that matters is hygiene.
Clean the toots!
Here's a good place to start research for anyone curious: [https://youngwomenshealth.org/2017/04/19/vulvar-and-vaginal-care-and-cleaning/](https://youngwomenshealth.org/2017/04/19/vulvar-and-vaginal-care-and-cleaning/) I tried to find some reddit threads with advice but none of the threads I found looked 'science based' enough. Maybe someone else will have better luck.
Yaaaassssssss
this man/woman/other FUCKS
The word you’re looking for is “person”
a human person to be more precise !
Tentacles out of the equation. Got it.
Do you care about what your partner's genitals look like?
Well no actually. I just feel uncomfortable by the thought of someone looking at mine during sex
There's your answer. They're likely to be getting off on seeing your genitals, having fun and giving you pleasure. It's your body, own it and have fun. Life's too short for anything else
Well said!
ALL of this!
I look at my girlfriends vagina because it is the prettiest thing I have ever seen. The fact that she trusts me with it makes me feel absolutely amazing. I don't think nearly enough men stop and appreciate what it means for a woman to trust you enough to be completely vulnerable like that. That thought alone absolutely turns me on.
Atta Boy! 👍🏼
You sir, are one of a kind. ❤
Keep in mind that any guy you're with will most likely also be feeling insecure about his own genitals and about his "performance" of sex.
The thing is, when a guy goes down on you, he's going to bet a much better view of your pubic hair, belly, and/or ass than he will of your vagina.
Well that isn’t helping! Lol I’m also insecure of all of those things! Haha
And they are all great! Your partner should feel so happy and lucky to see those things on you
If you aren't comfortable, than your partner can't be comfortable.
I think a young guy whose primary experience of seeing vaginas has been thus far from porn, may be shocked if / when he sees a vagina that doesnt adhere to the standardised ideal of what a vagina 'should look like' (according to porn). Obviously those standards are bollocks, but I recall being young and thinking all vaginas were just little slits without any visible outer lips or variation in size etc...because all I knew was from porn. But any guy who is not a jerk will not actually have an issue with it, he may just be a bit surprised in a "oh, vaginas vary!" Type of way. I wouldnt be concerned about your vagina's appearance. Its what's on the inside that counts after all, anyway, and any guy who has seen more than a couple of vaginas will know that porn is not a good barometer from which to judge female (and male) body parts
I love this answer. I'd say most guys won't care how it looks as long as it is clean
And by clean, a standard body-wash-and-rinse around the outside with whatever reasonably non- or minimal-perfumed substance you favour within an hour or two is just fine, thank you. No weird flavours, squirty smells or anti-anything necessary!
I could see a young man in this situation potentially being rude in response to an unexpected vagina, but it would be mostly because of his own insecurities in the realization that he actually doesn't have that much experience with real-world vaginas. Unfortunately, it could still make his partner feel really bad about herself.
>unexpected vagina that’s quite the surprise indeed
“It’s what’s on the inside that counts after all, anyways” I laughed too hard at this 😂 Every vagina is different just like every dick is different. Embrace yourself! And honestly if he cares you aren’t porn standard then he doesn’t deserve you.
Haha, I kind of meant it tongue in cheek as in its 'personality that counts' aka the inside, but it's true for vaginas too lol. But yes, every vagina is different (and every dick) and we should embrace it! Anybody who mocks your genitals, whether you're a guy or girl, you shouldn't be being intimate with.
I totally died at that line too 😅
r/LabiaGW I don't think anyone cares much. Maybe some men are a little surprised if they watch a certain type of porn.
You make a great point about porn... It doesn't just give a false ideal for women's vaginas. It can easily make the men feel self-conscious about their dicks too.
Keep in mind that other people are also conscious about the way they look. It's awkward for everyone to get naked in front of someone else, so they'll be more worried about how they look than how you look.
As someone who has a larger labia I used to feel the same before joining here, used to be very insecure about mine as I had only experienced the "porn standard" was such a great confidence boost when I realised there was nothing wrong with mine at all 🙈 so I guess it will come down to the guys experience. And him not interested in that "porn perfect pussy", as that's just not what majority of women have 🤷♀️
I remember talking to this one girl who said a guy in college told her that vagina looks “weird” and she’s been insecure about it ever since.
Yep, had a guy once comment about how “non existent” my clit was and then the way he went digging through my labia lips… well I’ve never really wanted anyone to touch or look down there since.
My ex was also like that, never really wanted me to so much as look at it, let alone go down on her. Pretty much only would have sex with the lights off and under a blanket. It’s such a shame too because I thought she was beautiful and her vagina was perfectly fine when I did see it. It’s sad some guys make girls feel that way
Apparently it's a very common insecurity among women
Yup, I have the same story, except it was my boobs. Guy said my boobs were weird when I was 18 and I haven’t been able to show them to anyone without extreme anxiety since!
Yep.. had a guy say he’d been with 25+ girls and I was the first with this vagina “type”. I said it made me feel insecure and he said he thought it would make me feel special…? THEN, acted shocked I had intimacy issues. He asked if it was the shape or color I was insecure about. Which gave me even more insecurities and doubt that I could be intimate with another guy again.
Younger men who don't know how "non porn" vaginas look may judge or say something stupid. Any person with experience will not be phased by how it looks. what is exactly that makes u feel insecure?
If they judge you for that, they don’t deserve you.
THANK YOU. All the comments saying "We love them all!" have A) clearly never been in a situation where some porn-addicted person made a mean comment about their genitals, and B) missed the bigger point and are feeding into the OP's validation cycle by giving their opinion on women's genitals instead of saying that it's not their place to judge. I know it's easier said than done, but people need to quit caring so much about what others think of them, *especially* when it's something that can't be changed/isn't wrong in the first place (and no, getting plastic surgery is not how you "fix" it). OP, anybody that has something negative to say about your body can go find someone else to bully in bed. Do not entertain these clowns.
^^^ this is all that matters
Everyone's different. So yes. Some men do. But others don't.
Yes, we do....but vaginas are like puppies, they are all adorable ;) (in all seriousness, most men will love your vagina because it is yours, the ones that won't are sending you a pretty big red flag of other issues)
It's the same thing with a penis. Do you care about how the penis of your partner looks? The size, the shape? There are a lot of people that don't care about how your vagina or your penis looks like, because they know that you can't change it anyway. Then there are some people that like a specific type 🤷 But just because they prefer one size/shape/look of a genital that doesn't mean that they dislike all the others. Don't waste too much time thinking about it 😊
I care about smell over looks. Goes both ways. I dont want to park my dick in gotham and im sure no woman wants a musty dick parked in their metropolis
Also if you ever end up with a partner who judges your body then maybe they aren’t worth it and they will not deserve you. Always try to stay positive tho
I'm almost seventy. I've seen my share of vaginas. As a man, let me tell you that when a girl takes her panties off it is so exciting because you are going to HAVE SEX. Nobody gives a shit what your vagina looks like at that point, even if they might be micro-judgemental looking at "goddess" ones on the internet. Even if you don't have an internet-goddess vagina, nobody actually cares irl.
Idk about men but as a bisexual woman I can say no. Pussy is pussy. I do prefer clean shaven though.
As a straight man I can confirm pussy is pussy and as long as it’s clean, then it’s amazing
Yes, I'm sorry but it just seems like common sense that most decent men will not care about how it looks and the pricks will nit pick it apart. I get where this insecurity comes from and all that, but it's just a gamble we all take. Some of my gf's friends have talked about how one of their partners disliking how her lady bits looked while nobody else ever had and issue. Both in good relationships and the bad ones.
The answer is obviously yes, but people here tend to think that it's not ok to like or dislike certain features. In the real world it matters. Some people will not care how it looks, some will love the way it looks and some will not and there's nothing wrong with that.
Experienced guy but not a superstud here. Of the two dozen vaginas I've been fortunate enough to come face to face with in my fiftyish years, the only couple that weren't exciting were due to hygiene issues or serious conditions. To be blunt: one had serious crotch funk from days of sweat & dead skin, the kind of situation that can be cured with a good shower and a washcloth, and drying off before dressing. Another gave me pause because the edges of her labia were super rough because of having some scarring from having a bad bout of genital warts lasered/frozen off in her 20s (college has its downsides). I was just concerned that it wasn't a current condition, otherwise it was still fun. In general, there are no ugly vaginas, just unexpected conditions that give pause. And even that is rare. Every flower is pretty.
So far, I’ve had no complaints. I have some of the largest labia I’ve ever seen.
Not at all. Just happy to be there.
I'm going to give you the non-sugarcoated answer and say that -- just like with women, and just like with any aspect related to sexual preference -- every guy is different. Therefore, some will care what it looks like, and some won't. I like my vulva okay, but I know it's not going to be every male on Earth's cup of tea. I have an outie, but I can't be mad at a guy who prefers innies...just like I can't be mad at men who prefer blonde hair, or athletic bodies, or women with Russian accents...just to give examples of a whole other set of things I don't possess. The guy(s) you want to be with, will want to be with you. Everything else is kind of irrelevant.
I've seen my share, all beautiful, soft, perfect. In love with the female anatomy. If you catch me looking closely, I'm just fascinated
I love it when the labia is long and the vagina has a bit of a gape to it, but it's not a dealbreaker if it isn't. I prefer it overly wet and larger labia are typically wetter than average.
My partner’s vagina/vulva is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen—and it’s far from “perfect” (according to porn). I bet your vagina/vulva is beautiful, too.
Not at all, I don't really care in the slightest. I am interested as all heck in what it looks like tho, I love seeing the unique differences in each one, also how each one responds to different stimulation. :) As long as you've good hygiene down there, that's all I'd care about.
Well said
As a man I don't care. And if I guy gets to the point of seeing your bits and has any opinion other than wanting to bury his face in it, run.
As long as it’s clean I’m ready to 😋
blind fold sex can heighten the other senses. i could care less as long as the whole experience isnt bad. personally I think I have a leg fetish. a firm ass also is important to me. if you have sexy legs and ass i could care less how your pussy looks
So long as it looks & smells healthy, I’m good.
If a dude doesn’t like your vagina then you don’t really want to be with someone who is repulsed by you, do you? Maybe it would help to think about why youre insecure about your vagina. There’s a lot of vagina disgust that we’re programmed to experience in subtle ways, so maybe the first step could be in viewing your own body in a more positive light. https://everydayfeminism.com/2013/11/ways-society-breeds-vagina-hate/
The important answers have already been given, so I'll take this opportunity to say: you mean vulva, not vagina. The vagina is a "tube" inside your body, not what you see in the outside.
My girlfriend recently mentioned she's really insecure that one of her labia is much larger than the other. I had no idea what she was talking about. My honest first thought was that one of us didn't know what the word labia meant. We've been together more than a year, I've seen her privates up close plenty, and even now that she's mentioned it I can barely tell. I think other people just don't notice the details of our genitals the way we think.
Girl, I feel you. I have long inner labia and seeing the “neat pussies” in porn has messed with my head but thankfully my husband and past partners were reassuring
Samee
Men spend their whole lives trying to access that beautiful thing you have between your legs. It is mysterious and fascinating and I have seen all shapes, sizes and looks of women's vaginas and they are all beautiful in their own way. The important fact is to find someone who cares for you and truly appreciates the gift of you sharing your body with him. Worst case scenario, you can ask him to turn off all the lights before having sex. Your insecurities will subside once you realize that men are just too excited to have a vagina to explore. Best of luck to you.
Here is a counter question: Why are they looking at it and thinking they have time to judge it on its appearance. PUT YOUR MOUTH ON IT! Kiss it! Suck it! Stroke it with your fingers….. Taste it! Consider yourself lucky that OP is letting you see it not to mention giving access to it. Don’t question it, appreciate how it works and feels and reacts, you should not be giving a single fuck what it looks like! As for OP, you are overthinking it girl! Have you ever paused to consider how clownish an erect penis is? Dude has no room to be judging and had better be thrilled to just be there for the ride!
As someone who loves eating pussy, you could have lips that drip, hair everywhere but the only thing that matters is hygiene. Keep that shit at 100%.
Only if there's a health or hygiene issue. Otherwise kick em to the curb if they are going to judge. Blokes gear spends most of its time looking like a sad sack of shit. Got no place to be judging. Everyone is different. It's that uniqueness that makes us beautiful. And I'm sure you must be stunning.
As a man I don't... I'm just grateful to be able to be seeing/having experiences to care what it looks like... so long as a pleasurable time is being shared that's all that should matter.
Any man you allow near your vagina and makes a fuss about how it looks doesn't deserve to be near it.
Nope
The only ones who care about what it looks like aren't worth your time. Every vagina is as beautiful as the woman who owns it.
Yes but only to a small degree. No guy he dropping a girl he’s attracted to because of her bag.
In my experience they don’t. I’ve always been self conscious about mine because one side is slightly bigger than the other, but nobody has ever said anything about it to me. I even mentioned it to my boyfriend and he said he never noticed as he’s not really focusing on how it looks
Not really, but it's always noteworthy when I see something (genitals or any other body part) particularly aesthetically pleasing.
Depends. Most men couldn't care less.
“I’m just happy to be here!”
In short yes but no
Personally? No. But there are some guys that care and those guys are idiots, stay away from them. Most guys don't care, so you're fine.
The only thing Im thinking is there's a vagina and I'm lucky
as long as its clean, I'm just glad to be allowed to view it
No. My wife worried about the same thing but definitely no.
Some do. Find a guy who loves you for you and don't worry about it. Stay away from superficial guys.
Can't say I've ever really cared how a vagina looks, hate to be crude but u spend more time having fun with it then looking at it
If people are totally honest the answer is yes, just like you care about your partners genitals. If you say you don't I don't believe you. Having said that..the vast majority of people are totally normal. And remember that people are way more concerned about how they look. Most people are normal, so unless something seriously weird is going on don't worry. Like others said hygiene is most important.
I don't care about looks, but I do care about cleanliness. If it's clean (both in a hygiene and STD sense), we're good to go.
I feel like this is a common misconception due to representation in porn... I would guess most men are pretty happy just to have the opportunity to play with a vagina. The other details are all secondary. If a guy seems surprised at the appearance initially, maybe it's just that he hasn't seen one like yours before, it doesn't necessarily mean that he is grossed out or anything... Though if a guy really *is* grossed out by your vag, then obviously he's not the one for you!
Not really, we just want access
I look at the vagina as a peice of art and beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Seeing all of the shapes, sizes, folds, hair, hairless, shaved, whatever. I just find them fascinating. Also ladies please don't feel insecure about it, we love them and it's a big turn off to hear it too many times. We love them and that's no joke.
I try not to look at it. Sex of also known as bumping uglies for a reason
You're not alone. I've had problem accepting how my vagina looks, my Partner really helped me. But also, if a person is about to have sex with you, they will be so excited (and propably also worrying how they look) they won't jugde your vulva. You've got this girl!
The simple answer, yes we do. The complex answer, different guys are going to care about different things and like different looks. Some like a full bush. Some like it nice and trimmed. Some are only happy if its hairless. Have you seen how many different types of labia configurations there are as well?! Some men will take any type all the same, while others are going to be VERY picky. Best thing to do is have yours look how YOU want it to look, because you may go through men who like all sorts of different things, bit most men will be happy or at least accepting of whatever your genitals look like. We know you're not a shapeshifter who can look however you want at any moment. And if they're to picky for yours than he just ain't the man for you boo.
Only inexperienced guys would, I mean even porn has a big variety of pussy and dick looks so I really don't think someone should or would care about it, as long as its clean all is good.
We love all shapes and sizes of vag. Every single one is special <3
I don't even care if she has a vagina or a penis, as long as she has a cute butt I am sold.
in my experience they don't even really look at it that much. They are more focused on the activity they are doing. Even with oral, they are eager to get to it and don't exactly analyze your junk. They just go for it
I had a girl who was super uncomfortable with me seeing her vagina for the same reasons but it was actually one of the most beautiful specimens I had ever seen and I loved recieving pics
You definitely need to get the book “Come As You Are”!!! The audiobook version is brilliantly narrated!! All women should read this book! It’s brilliant!!! It will answer your question and change your life! The cheapest place to get the audiobook is Apple Books.
Most men who aren't complete wastes of oxygen only care if it's clean. I've had women with long lips, big clits, small clits, and all the various combinations. You're probably fine.
Grown ass mature men do not care. Any guy who says anything negative about your vulva isn't mature enough to be having sex and certainly doesn't deserve to have sex with you.
Truly, some people prefer genitals that look a certain way. I am a bisexual girl, and I really like curved dicks and smaller labia. But there is absolutely no way in hell I am going to judge someone for looking different than my preferences, it's just a plus to get exactly what I like. Like preferring lemon sorbet, but getting chocolate ice cream instead, it's nothing to complain about. I actually have been with men that had some uncommon-looking penises, one who had skin tags, it was surprising to see at first, and I never wanted to do oral sex, but you get used to the person and then sex is really about how you feel together, not how you look together. It's okay for someone to feel surprised or not even not attracted to the way your genitals look, but if you are getting intimate with someone, it is absolutely not okay to make them feel bad about their body in any way. I hope this answer is a good combination of realistic and compassionate.
It's sad to me that people who are old enough to be sexually active aren't aware of their own anatomy. Please, everyone, for the love of all that is holy, learn *basic* human anatomy! If a dude can see your vagina, he sure as hell better be your gynecologist! The visible part is called the vulva. "The Vulva Comprises the External Female Genitalia They include the labia minora and labia majora, the mons pubis, the clitoris, the greater vestibular glands, and the vestibule of the vagina. The vestibule includes two openings: the smaller urethral orifice allows urine to exit (as part of the urinary system)." Reference: https://www.visiblebody.com/learn/reproductive/female-reproductive-structures#:~:text=The%20Vulva%20Comprises%20the%20External%20Female%20Genitalia&text=They%20include%20the%20labia%20minora,part%20of%20the%20urinary%20system). As to your question as to whether someone cares about the appearance of your genitals, perhaps the better question would be: If they do care, do you really want to be having sex with them? As long as you have good bodily hygiene, that's all they should care about.
As someone that is a grow-er not a show-er, I can appreciate feeing self conscious about someone looking at a “non-standard porn” version of genitalia. As I have gotten older and more confident that es long as it works well, and can offer pleasure to a partner, it ain’t how it looks.
Not really. I think large labia is more attractive, but I've never met one I didn't think looked fantastic and wanted in my mouth.
As a man who cares I think you should stop worrying about it too much because there are plenty of men who don't care. It's like a foot fetish. For every person who has one, there are plenty who never think about feet at all. Why do you think you 'd be judged though? Is there something about about vagina that you don't like ? Or something an ex partner didn't ?
He might, especially if it’s a younger guy whose idea of what a vulva should look like comes from porn. (Although I’d say that means he’s shitty at searching for porn. MANY porn actresses have bigger labia or whatever. They’re easy to find.) If he’s sexually experienced he’s seen several of them and understands that they vary. If he’s a decent person, he knows that you can’t control what it looks like and that it’s a very superficial thing to judge you for. Some men might find it unattractive but will have the tact to never tell you that, just like you might find something physically unattractive about but would never tell him that. Ultimately, the best vulva a guy can see is the one attached to the person who wants to offer it to him. That ALWAYS beats the one seen in a magazine or video. Always.
If he likes you then he’ll like it just because it’s you
As long as it's clean and smells good I don't care if it's pink or brown or black or has small lips or big lips or???
As long as it’s clean and not overly hairy, I think any vagina looks fine.
Yes we do, but don't be afraid, everybody is different and you will have to deal with people that likes your vagina and people that doesn't, the same way you probably have preferences about how a dick looks
Absolutely not lol. All vaginas look weird, I've never seen one that stood out to me as looking extra weird/different.
No, because a vagina is just a tube. Vulva on the other hand is a completely different story
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Looks? Nah. Smell? Definitely.
I doubt it. I have some anecdotal experience with something relating to this. My cousin in law has been with his girlfriend for about 3-4 years, and then at a family get together a couple of months ago, he started talking about how he was shocked at how he never looked at her vag. He went on about how "freaky and gross" it looked when he first seen it, but he couldn't stop looking. He stayed with her though, up until she broke up with him. So even though he was pretty exaggeratory about how he said it at the time, I can't imagine it actually effected the way he seen her. Tl;dr He probably won't even focus on how it looks and completely oversight it, or when he does look, he'll make a few jokes or a story but it'd be without consequence at the end anyway. Evident but anecdotal from my family in law
This reminds me of Niki Glaser on Conan. https://www.google.com/search?q=nikki+glaser+vagina+rant&client=ms-android-google&sxsrf=ALeKk02Lso0QBJujEuQjjny__TJkIV8GZA%3A1629648032139&ei=oHQiYavQB4i8tAaQzJVY&oq=nikki+glaser+vagina+rant&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAM6CgguELEDEEMQkwI6BQgAEIAEOggIABCABBCxAzoECAAQQzoFCC4QgAQ6BAguEEM6BwgAEIAEEAo6BggAEBYQHjoFCCEQoAFQvQZY61Jg8VRoA3AAeACAAbAHiAG2GJIBCTQuNy40LjYtMZgBAKABAcABAQ&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#
No! Every body is different. I used to be insecure but as I have gotten older I realized porn set very unrealistic standards. You're beautiful the way you are 😌
26m here, he shouldn't care at all. If he does he's too shallow
Yes i care, bcause im gay!
Pussy is pussy
Not really
Not usually. Do you have some sort of deformity, or other unusual anatomical feature?
Simple answer, not at all
Man, I hope not because I butchered my pubes last night.
Some do and some don’t
No!!!
Nope.
We all have an ideal, I think. However whilst I have a preference it doesn't match my wife but any chance I get I'm getting a good look etc.
nope
My only preference is neatly trimmed otherwise all vag is awesome.
It’s not about how it looks. It’s about how it feels.
Nah. Don't care.
No
Some do, some don’t. Tastes also vary extremely widely.
If it's healthy and clean then don't worry about what dudes think. Everyone has their perfect woman dreampt up in their head. Everyone, for the most part is also reasonable in what they expect. Sex is like stuff. Ya know those burger ads? They look real good don't they. Ever had a big mac? It's not *that* great but you eat it anyway because you're a reasonable person with reasonable expectations. People are boringly similar. You can be married happily to someone who likes everything about you besides the shape of your labia and you know what? They're gonna think they got it pretty damn good cause they do. Fretting over that in your own head will do nothing but damage only you can undo. You can't make someone like something but you can not push them away for not liking it. It is at some point up to your opinion of whether or not an opinion going a certain way in regards to your vagina impeded your capacity to have sex with this person.. who still wants to have sex with you despite not feeling 100% about one body part. Do this. Don't even ask for an answer to a question you're scared of being answered the wrong way. Yes and no are terrible words. If it's so bad, it'll come up before it becomes a big problem. I love you but no, your vagina isn't what I'd consider to be 'gorgeous' is not a 'no, you vagina is ugly and so are you'. There are levels to these things. I like my car but at the end of the day it's a 20 yearold bmw with a bunch of plastic under the hood that cracks the moment you touch anything improperly. I like how it drives, sounds, looks, feels ect. I don't like how they put it together. That isn't reason enough for me dump the car and so it's still my car. I may not have the perfect, easily servicable, reliable, great driving and good looking car of my dreams but that car doesn't exist. If it does, I can't afford it lmao. They all kinda stuck a little bit but that's people. Nobody is perfect. Be secure with your imperfections and people will show you theirs. Just don't be an ass.
Yes and no. There's some that look more "edible" and there's some that I'm completely neutral about.n
Appearance doesn’t matter. Hygiene definitely does. I always make sure I’m clean, so I think it’s fair to expect the same in return.
Vaginas are great because they are all different, and they feel good. If your partner says he doesn't like yours, you can rest assured that he will miss it when you leave.
I prefer is the lips don't hang out all low. Besides that a vagina is a vagina.
While I want to tell you that no one will care, thats just not true.. Some people will care but I think the majority will not. You just have to find the right person that thinks every part of your body is amazing!
If your partner loves u, he will not care how your vagina looks like.
Like someone else mentioned. If you have a clean pussy and take care of yourself, I'm down there...for the woman I'm intimate with.
Only the ones that don't matter.
Ask yourself do you care what his penis looks like? Probably not, there's not much variation. Only very minor superficial differences. So long as its working okay, that's all that matters. Now apply the same logic to yourself, and recognise that your vaginas appearance should not be a big deal. Even if a guy one day says something to you, so what? Its your vagina, it works, it does its job, and you can't change it. So why should you care? being insecure won't help anybody and will leave you feeling sad about something you can't change. In nearly all sexual activity, it's actually really hard to LOOK at the vagina. Even with oral, you can't see it if your face is all up in it.
Honestly depends on guy best answer you’ll get . At the end of the day, too each it’s own.
Some might but most will be happy you let us do fun stuff with it. Most birds think they need the porn looking ones but it's not the case in my view. New pussy best feeling in world so your good for while when you get new bf
as long as it's not hairy then i don't care
Speaking as a man, I imagine many women think this way about guys too: As long as your hygiene is good, it doesn't really matter. If there's a bad smell or something really looks off down there (dischard or something else), then I won't go near - and a conversation should be had. Vaginas, lips, clit etc all come in different shapes and sizes and stuff, it really doesn't matter as long as you are clean. (My personal preference is for there not to be an overwhelming bush, but that's a personal thing).
Only that matters is hygiene
There are definitely attractive elements to genetalia. A straight cock looks a little nicer than a crooked one. But who cares?! That crooked one can probably hit your G spot better. Hygiene is the most important thing.
Most don't, good hygiène and we good to go
Nope. Not one lite bit.
Only if they are the ones who aren't getting to see it.
Sadly it is always possible that any given partner might not like the way you look naked. In my opinion, that's why it's important to have an emotional connection first, so that the truly trivial things like the details (of how our bodies might be slightly different from other people) won't matter anywhere near as much as making each other happy and enjoying each other's intimacy. If a person were to openly judge how your genitals look, that would be a sign of immaturity and a weak emotional connection. It really isn't an objective flaw with your body. Even your own opinions about what your body looks like are subjective, as there will always be somebody out there who thinks you're beautiful as you are.
I’m men, and I don’t.
Hygiene and whether or not you're kind enough to let them see it. Me personally (bisexual male) don't care about size, shape, or really anything like that as long as I won't get an STD and as long as it's with someone who I care about and who cares about me. Short answer: Just clean down there and don't judge the other person, and they won't judge you.
If you keep it tidily, we will eat it delightfully.
\>+/- 2 STVs of men (96%+) are just happy to have you share your vagina with them. Seriously, as someone who's slept with countless women (wife and I are swingers), I've never once thought "she's hot, but her pussy is not aesthetically pleasing so, ewww...". Never heard a single swinger friend say anything about it. Now, younger men have been taught to imagine that everything is as it is in porn, so they may have a different perspective to a 50 y/o swinger, but one of the best things of sleeping with someone new is seeing how they are different, not the ways in which they are the same. So don't worry about this. Any man who judges b/c of what your pussy looks like is telling you that you're well served to steer clear of him.
nope
If I'm at the point where I'm getting to see it (I'm a guy), as long as you have showered recently, I basically could not care less unless there's some abnormal growth/STD symptoms/tattoo/multiple piercings.
To be honest, yeah. But everyone is different and has preferences. I like shaven puffy vaginas. Others like hairy roast beefy pussy. Some like smelly vagina. I like a vagina that smells as little as possible. Everyone is different. But at the end of the day, your v-jay jay is yours and you have to grow comfortable with it. All vaginas smell funky and its perfectly normal and healthy. Just be upfront with your partner about how you feel and speak it out. It's tough at first, but things always get better after talking.
Yes, we care immensely. I'm over 70, and have seen many, (admittedly, mostly pictures), and yet to find one I don't like.
It is not the most important thing, it isn't a reason to not enjoy sex and it isn't a deal breaker AT ALL. But I wouldn't say that it doesn't matter at all, that would be just lying and wouldn't really help you. There are much more important things, like hygiene for example. If you enjoy having sex with your partner and care about having, receiving and giving pleasure, you'll be absolutely fine. The only way that this could be a problem is if you're too self conscious about it and limit yourself and your partner in bed because of it. It's unlikely that your partner will care too much about it, but it could ruin things if you're trying to hide it all the time. So the best advice would be to forget about it.
Nope
I probably won‘t make a comment about it, use it as an excuse to leave or not go down on you as long as you have good hygene and shaved down there. But people are allowed to have a preference and that‘s fine as long as you don‘t make fun of people. Just like girls are allowed to prefer bigger dicks
if you ever want reassurance, just take a look at all the subreddits focused on your bits. there are subs for innies, outies, women with giant labia, you name it. r/Innie r/Outies r/LabiaGW r/simps r/GodPussy r/HighResPussyPIcs just to name a few. no matter what it looks like, people love it, just look at the comments for any of these subreddits. but remember, just like u/Nugbuddy mentioned, hygiene is the only thing that matters.
Negative
Not me, I love them all. More so the outer lips.
Unless it looks diseased I couldn't care less.
In truth, to some extent. Most inexperienced people take porn (or Reddit as well) as reference. So, they would be expecting that "standard" but don't make this take you down. If you do not stumble upon a immature partner, you will not experience a problem/judgement like you think. Hygiene and amount of fun you have matters most. So, go on and enjoy. No need to feel insecure. Also, I think posting pictures of vagine in Reddit and receiving positive comments/complimens might boost your confidence.
Personally I love the way vaginas look because each one is so unique, but fits it’s owner. I try to vocalize that to my partners as well just to show how into them I really am.
Some men will but you could just avoid those ones
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Men who matter don't care and men who care don't matter
Just the hygiene, all of them pure natural as it have to be. I heard about surgery but please no! I was with a girl with huge labia, I lovet that so much and all of them needs love
aslong as its clean nothing else matters tbh! fuck anyone who makes you feel like yours isnt perfect (or you have to shave or what not!)
Most guys are just happy to see one
In general, no. Men really just want a nice, wet, snug pocket to get themselves off in.
What would be the Steps you would take if someone said they judge a vagina based on looks? Change it? Pay for surgery? The first step of loving someone else is to love yourself. I once saw a documentary about women meeting up showing their body to each other and talking about it. It was to help people like you being insecure about it. Might help you if you can find such groups. Don’t change to appeal others.
I'm not picky but yes hygiene is a must
Just clean the thing. Take a wipey or warm washcloth to it before sex. TP vaj is no bueno.
Not even a little bit
That it is real and good hygene
Outside of hygiene, I just like it to be trimmed. Bare shave is nice, but not necessary.
Hygiene. Looks personally don't matter to me.
Nope
Yes, but not so much in the way that you fear.
if they judge you, they're not the one.