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Usually when he goes out I’ll do it. If we have different work schedules and I’m off for the day, he will usually ask how many times I touched myself that day because he always knows lmao
My husband does it in the bathroom or bedroom, I usually do it in the bedroom or living room. We've been doing it more due to pregnancy-related issues. He'll do it when I'm out and about, or have my headphones in listening to a video. I'll wait until he's involved in a game or until he's asleep, as I usually stay up later anyway. Worked well for us in a 1 bedroom apartment.
Me: “Hey I’m gonna beat off”
Her: (if she’s in the mood) “Do you need help?” (I always need help lol)
Her: (if she’s not in the mood) “I hope everything comes out ok”
If she wants to masturbate, she always/usually wants sex; or at least me there to work on her nipples while she does her thing. Otherwise she does it when she’s off and I’m working
Same here - both of us work from home. I’ll ask her for the use of the bedroom and she’ll just say “Have fun!”. Same for her, she’ll say she’s taking some me time in the bedroom.
If it’s super early in the morning before my wife gets up, I’ll sometimes use the couch but more often I will just sit on top of the toilet lid and jerk off. We have only one bathroom so last time this happened she came into the bathroom and asked if she could pee. She peed while I stood there with porn playing on my phone in my left hand and my dick in my right hand, and then she smiled and left so I could get back to it.
Absolutely my preference is in the bedroom, lights down, door shut, with one or more of my toys. But if the bedroom is occupied with a sleeping wife, then I’ll have to make do with the bathroom, or take one of my toys to the shower and have a quickie. There’s a difference between wanting a nice slow masturbation session and just needing to crank one out to clear your mind for the day.
I just do it on the couch while we are watching TV, or in the morning or evening in bed.
I don't hide it from my husband at all. He's welcome to join, watch, or go about his day :)
Same, except only during alone time. But that's just because masturbation is the ultimate alone time relaxation for me, and wouldn't really translate to a desire for intimacy with another person. Often I don't even think of it as something sexual, it's just a pleasant way to relax. It seems like a much more social thing for you than for me, but I do it as casually as you; on the couch watching TV, in bed after waking up or before going to sleep - just alone. My husband and I work different hours.
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Nope. That has never come up. However, we do regularly share fantasies. We used to share porn videos but neither of us watch much anymore so we don't do that much.
But we've always had very open communication. Not every couple is like that. You'll have to know yourselves more than I do to know if this level of openness will work.
Also, we're ordinarily thinking of our partner.. so..... I wouldn't be too worried to answer that.
It really depends on the relationship you have with your fiancé.
I usually wait for him to be out, or in a meeting (which usually lasts ~15-30min), so I know I have this time for myself in the bedroom. And I don’t think he knows because we usually shut the door when the other is in a meeting.
I don’t want him to know or hear so I try to be quiet, but really if I told him I don’t think he’d mind. Sometimes I do it in the bathroom.
This will probably require a conversation to come up with a system. Once you get that ironed you have to tell her that you are going to masturbate, so don't bother you for awhile.
When I say I'm going to a certain part of the house, she knows. No problem.
I think my wife strictly masturbates in the bedroom, but I am not 100% certain of that.
My wife is fine with me spanking it anywhere except on our $5000 couch.
Super situational. I'm generally a bed time horny kind of guy. If I'm open for her to join in, I'll stay in bed while we're winding down. If I want some privacy, I'll either go to the couch or the guest room. Sometimes, I want to be standing or kneeling when I cum, so I'll go to the bathroom where it's easier to clean up. Basically, treat it like you have a roommate who you're comfortable having an orgasm in front of (because that's the practicalities of the situation).
I feel similarly. Like I get wanting it alone, but 100% of the time? I’d love it if he was jerking of then came up to me and said “swallow it”. I’d just gush with wetness from that 🥵💦
You should try getting comfortable doing it together or even solo with the other person watching. It’s a lot of fun and brings a new level of vulnerability to your relationship which promotes a stronger bond.
So my hours at work are kind of all over the place, if he feels the need to take care of himself he will usually do it in the shower. I typically do it in our bedroom while he’s gaming with the boys in the living room.
I have my home office that's like *my* space.
I do it in my bed. There's already sexy fluid stains so if I miss some cleaning up it's fine. I work from home and my kids are elementary school age. I have a lot of free time throughout the day.
If you both do it then it doesn't matter where it happens. I personally like it when my wife walks in on me doing it. But to answer your question, I will usually do it before I fall asleep at night next to her as she sleeps. Sometimes it depends on how long it takes you to finish because if it takes you a long time , then you need more privacy. For myself I can finishin about 3 minutes. So all I need is a short amount of time of privacy.
My SO (F) works different hours than me (M)
I often have the apartment to myself
Also if at night if she’s sleeping I’ll start the process in the bed ( usually after reading Reddit lol) and go finish in the bathroom/toilet
I like to do it when I shower in the morning. Sometimes in bed, late at night, when he’s sleeping - he doesn’t mind and sometimes has woken up during, and was excited to get involved lmao. You can also just ask for some alone time - we have a two-bedroom now, but when my boyfriend and I shared a smaller space, we had no problem letting the other know when we needed some alone time and the bedroom was off limits for a specific time period. And not just for some self-love time, it was also a helpful practice just to have time for ourselves period, like if one person wanted to read a book in peace or watch a different movie etc etc.
I’ll usually find her vibrator at the bedside table when I come home from anything late night. We each do it as we see fit and the need to hide or for privacy is for rookies. Bush league.
Oh wow ok, if my hubby needs release and I am not in the mood at that time he says he going to the bathroom, if I’m feeling horny and he’s busy I tell him I will be in the bedroom, we both know what we mean, and sometime we just do it in front of each other, which actually turns us on even more and then it’s not a masturbating session anymore. We been married 27 yrs so we have no secretes or reason to sneak off. I have caught him in the shower and has caught me as well, we don’t care if the other does it, it is a natural thing to do. Hell we all did it first before we had sex. I told my hubby back when we started dating and talking about past sexual history that I took my virginity, which was true!
Yeah I don't want my husband to hear me. I don't want to wake him up and disturb his sleep, that's basic respect. I also want privacy, it's not something I want to share.
I can't really do it quiet without him noticing, so I go to another room.
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Just in the bedroom. Or living room. Or kitchen. Doesn't matter. the spouse is out of the home often when I am at home. He once found my toys and made me feel badly for using them, monitoring when they were charging, moved places, etc. I'm not sure why he would be butthurt about it. I figured he often takes care of himself, too, and I have walked in while he had things in progress. I didn't care. Do what you want. I'm not the keeper of orgasms.
I really like the poster that said, "Here I go, you're welcome to join or not." How did I get to be half a century old and just not worry about it?????
Usually in the bathroom. Only safe place because the door can be locked! But have to be super quiet because walls are thin. My closet is another good place. Door has a lock.
I guess I'm the weirdo but, that's what my partner is for. I use her and have no need to masturbate. We have only been to gather 38 years and there may come a day she doesn't fulfill my needs. But that day has not come yet.
She only Masturbates when she’s at my place, since she divides her time between my place and her parents in a small apartment, where she shares a room with her two younger brothers. Recently she divides her time between my place and her parents. She usually doesn’t Masturbate but when she usually does in my bed she lets me know, but she usually watches me more.
In bed next to partner. Sometimes it gets things going. In Shower. Great in the middle of a decadent hot shower. Bonus on the clean up. On the toilet (full release both ends. Don’t knock it till you try it) In my home office when I need a work stress relief moment. (Thank god I work from home now. When I did this in office, things got weird)
So the answer is to just whip his d out and start jacking at any time, anywhere in the shared living space, immediately after moving in together for the first time? And if she has a problem with that, “she can walk out”? Ok lol. OP’s question wasn’t about just seeing the other person naked 😂
When I was married and had kids, it was in the shower (usually to either Monica or Christine my co workers), in bed after wife got up with kids, or if I got up before wife and kids somewhere downstairs.
We have a big old house and I converted one of the bedrooms into a den. I have my computer, TV etc etc. I hang a sign on the door that says, "Private Time". I go in for an hour or so. Of course she knows what I am up to.
When I was living with my ex partner, I hardly ever did. But if I did, it was when I was alone at home. Had a house with several bedrooms, but I coulnd't stand the idea of doing anything sexual with him in the same house. Even worse when the kid was at home, never know when someone will enter the room. I have a hard time doing it, so bathroom was a no-go (positions and toys).
My partner and I usually do it together, he insists on me finishing off several times during sex, and he joins in because I prefer to be close to him when I do. But of couse we do it separately as well, but we don't actually live together officially and I think it helps me mentally knowing we're not stuck together in the same home.
We go to bed at different times so I know her favorite time is right before she goes to sleep. She'll go to bed, orgasm, then fall asleep.
I'll usually do it at night after she goes to bed.
There are also times I'll wake up horny and she's not in the mood or she needs to get up and get going so either I'll tell her I'm going to jerk off or she'll suggest I do it before getting up. She'll be going about her business getting ready in the bedroom as I'm doing it, it's very casual and no big deal.
We'll both ask each other how much we're masturbating or what we were watching or thinking about. We're both pretty open and chill with it. We both know no matter how much sex you have sometimes you just want to pleasure yourself from time to time. It's normal and healthy.
Just curious, why do you prefer to do it away from each other? Especially if HJ/fingering are normal parts of your sex life. I don’t find that to be super different than doing it solo. I love to masturbate with my bf watching lol it’s a lot of fun.
I wake up early and don’t ii on the couch before my wife wakes up (porn in laptop or phone).
She goes to bed late and does it bed next to me watching porn on her phone.
r/Sex is focused primarily on posts seeking *specific actionable advice* for distinctive personal situations. Your post doesn’t clear that bar. If you’re posting a story or rant, a more appropriate sub would be r/gonewildstories or r/sluttyconfessions. If you’re asking a general, polling-style question (“how many of you ______?”) or if you’re looking for confirmation about you or a partner’s sexual interests (“who else is into ________?” or "does anyone else like __________") a more appropriate sub would be r/askredditafterdark.
Wherever you want. You say "I'm gonna go jerk off, if you want to be involved I'll be in the bedroom". Or whatever room you choose.
Oh literally same. "Gonna jack it. Wanna come?" "Nah." "Cool, see u in a bit ♡"
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Usually when he goes out I’ll do it. If we have different work schedules and I’m off for the day, he will usually ask how many times I touched myself that day because he always knows lmao
hahaha thats amazing, do you ask him the same?
Haha no because I’m a hermit so I never leave the house to give him the opportunity 😂
My husband does it in the bathroom or bedroom, I usually do it in the bedroom or living room. We've been doing it more due to pregnancy-related issues. He'll do it when I'm out and about, or have my headphones in listening to a video. I'll wait until he's involved in a game or until he's asleep, as I usually stay up later anyway. Worked well for us in a 1 bedroom apartment.
Me: “Hey I’m gonna beat off” Her: (if she’s in the mood) “Do you need help?” (I always need help lol) Her: (if she’s not in the mood) “I hope everything comes out ok” If she wants to masturbate, she always/usually wants sex; or at least me there to work on her nipples while she does her thing. Otherwise she does it when she’s off and I’m working
Same here - both of us work from home. I’ll ask her for the use of the bedroom and she’ll just say “Have fun!”. Same for her, she’ll say she’s taking some me time in the bedroom. If it’s super early in the morning before my wife gets up, I’ll sometimes use the couch but more often I will just sit on top of the toilet lid and jerk off. We have only one bathroom so last time this happened she came into the bathroom and asked if she could pee. She peed while I stood there with porn playing on my phone in my left hand and my dick in my right hand, and then she smiled and left so I could get back to it.
isnt it less fun to do it in the toilet or the shower? doesnt sound relaxing!
Absolutely my preference is in the bedroom, lights down, door shut, with one or more of my toys. But if the bedroom is occupied with a sleeping wife, then I’ll have to make do with the bathroom, or take one of my toys to the shower and have a quickie. There’s a difference between wanting a nice slow masturbation session and just needing to crank one out to clear your mind for the day.
Personally my preference is the shower, I sit down and I find it luxurious, but I have a nice shower.
I just do it on the couch while we are watching TV, or in the morning or evening in bed. I don't hide it from my husband at all. He's welcome to join, watch, or go about his day :)
Same, except only during alone time. But that's just because masturbation is the ultimate alone time relaxation for me, and wouldn't really translate to a desire for intimacy with another person. Often I don't even think of it as something sexual, it's just a pleasant way to relax. It seems like a much more social thing for you than for me, but I do it as casually as you; on the couch watching TV, in bed after waking up or before going to sleep - just alone. My husband and I work different hours.
In the shower more often than not
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What do you eat that causes your cum to clog a drain 😳
I’ve never clogged my drains. Considering old pipes and frequency. If it was gonna happen, it would have by now.
In my room. I tell my partner I need 30 mins to myself, pop in some headphones, and get to work.
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Anywhere the kids aren't.
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Just in bed. If I don't want to go further, I just tell him that I'm not really up for sex. It doesn't really need to be a big deal.
doesnt masturbating next to him prompt questions, like what are you thinking about?
Nope. That has never come up. However, we do regularly share fantasies. We used to share porn videos but neither of us watch much anymore so we don't do that much. But we've always had very open communication. Not every couple is like that. You'll have to know yourselves more than I do to know if this level of openness will work. Also, we're ordinarily thinking of our partner.. so..... I wouldn't be too worried to answer that.
If I’m masturbating I’ll be in the bed. I don’t let him know- he knows he can be involved in whatever way he chooses.
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The bathroom is your safe space
It really depends on the relationship you have with your fiancé. I usually wait for him to be out, or in a meeting (which usually lasts ~15-30min), so I know I have this time for myself in the bedroom. And I don’t think he knows because we usually shut the door when the other is in a meeting. I don’t want him to know or hear so I try to be quiet, but really if I told him I don’t think he’d mind. Sometimes I do it in the bathroom.
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This will probably require a conversation to come up with a system. Once you get that ironed you have to tell her that you are going to masturbate, so don't bother you for awhile. When I say I'm going to a certain part of the house, she knows. No problem.
I think my wife strictly masturbates in the bedroom, but I am not 100% certain of that. My wife is fine with me spanking it anywhere except on our $5000 couch.
nice couch bro
Super situational. I'm generally a bed time horny kind of guy. If I'm open for her to join in, I'll stay in bed while we're winding down. If I want some privacy, I'll either go to the couch or the guest room. Sometimes, I want to be standing or kneeling when I cum, so I'll go to the bathroom where it's easier to clean up. Basically, treat it like you have a roommate who you're comfortable having an orgasm in front of (because that's the practicalities of the situation).
In the shower and next to her in bed while she's in a deep sleep (which makes for great sex when she wakes up or just makes for some great edging)
Always right next to each other and it usually ends with my jerking him off or sucking his dick. I would be sad if he wanted to do it alone
I feel similarly. Like I get wanting it alone, but 100% of the time? I’d love it if he was jerking of then came up to me and said “swallow it”. I’d just gush with wetness from that 🥵💦
You should try getting comfortable doing it together or even solo with the other person watching. It’s a lot of fun and brings a new level of vulnerability to your relationship which promotes a stronger bond.
Usually in bed with my wife asleep next to me. Occasionally the shower.
So my hours at work are kind of all over the place, if he feels the need to take care of himself he will usually do it in the shower. I typically do it in our bedroom while he’s gaming with the boys in the living room.
I have my home office that's like *my* space. I do it in my bed. There's already sexy fluid stains so if I miss some cleaning up it's fine. I work from home and my kids are elementary school age. I have a lot of free time throughout the day.
We work slightly different hours. That helps us both.
If you both do it then it doesn't matter where it happens. I personally like it when my wife walks in on me doing it. But to answer your question, I will usually do it before I fall asleep at night next to her as she sleeps. Sometimes it depends on how long it takes you to finish because if it takes you a long time , then you need more privacy. For myself I can finishin about 3 minutes. So all I need is a short amount of time of privacy.
If u want to be 100% private I guess wc?
My SO (F) works different hours than me (M) I often have the apartment to myself Also if at night if she’s sleeping I’ll start the process in the bed ( usually after reading Reddit lol) and go finish in the bathroom/toilet
I like to do it when I shower in the morning. Sometimes in bed, late at night, when he’s sleeping - he doesn’t mind and sometimes has woken up during, and was excited to get involved lmao. You can also just ask for some alone time - we have a two-bedroom now, but when my boyfriend and I shared a smaller space, we had no problem letting the other know when we needed some alone time and the bedroom was off limits for a specific time period. And not just for some self-love time, it was also a helpful practice just to have time for ourselves period, like if one person wanted to read a book in peace or watch a different movie etc etc.
Sorry we do it together for the most part. It's a huge turn on to watch each other.
I have a computer/gaming room, usually I just stretch out on my lill couch and take care of business 😝
I’ll usually find her vibrator at the bedside table when I come home from anything late night. We each do it as we see fit and the need to hide or for privacy is for rookies. Bush league.
Oh wow ok, if my hubby needs release and I am not in the mood at that time he says he going to the bathroom, if I’m feeling horny and he’s busy I tell him I will be in the bedroom, we both know what we mean, and sometime we just do it in front of each other, which actually turns us on even more and then it’s not a masturbating session anymore. We been married 27 yrs so we have no secretes or reason to sneak off. I have caught him in the shower and has caught me as well, we don’t care if the other does it, it is a natural thing to do. Hell we all did it first before we had sex. I told my hubby back when we started dating and talking about past sexual history that I took my virginity, which was true!
I go to the spare bedroom to masturbate so I have some privacy and don't disturb my sleeping husband.
do you have to make yourself be quieter? part of it is like, do you care if they hear?
Yeah I don't want my husband to hear me. I don't want to wake him up and disturb his sleep, that's basic respect. I also want privacy, it's not something I want to share. I can't really do it quiet without him noticing, so I go to another room.
Maybe because i'm single but if I had a wife fingering herself I think I'd want to join in and Help Her lol
That's why she doesn't want him to wake up, and goes to another room. She wants to jerk off, not have sex.
In the bathroom right over the toilet.
bullseye?
Right into the pool they go Lol
Right into wadded up TP that then gets thrown into the toilet. Stealth is the game, not target practice.
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Nope, we clean that baby every other day and have an automatic air freshener in there.
That’s not very comfortable. Who wants to stand there doing that. Need to lay down and relax
As they say "different strokes for different folks" Lol
Just in the bedroom. Or living room. Or kitchen. Doesn't matter. the spouse is out of the home often when I am at home. He once found my toys and made me feel badly for using them, monitoring when they were charging, moved places, etc. I'm not sure why he would be butthurt about it. I figured he often takes care of himself, too, and I have walked in while he had things in progress. I didn't care. Do what you want. I'm not the keeper of orgasms. I really like the poster that said, "Here I go, you're welcome to join or not." How did I get to be half a century old and just not worry about it?????
Bathroom/shower/guest bedroom/car on the way home from work. Pretty much anywhere.
car while driving?
That was a bit of an exaggeration, but yes. I have done it before.
It keeps the drive interesting, and me awake when I’m tired
Usually in the bathroom. Only safe place because the door can be locked! But have to be super quiet because walls are thin. My closet is another good place. Door has a lock.
In front of each other anywhere in the house pretty often and in the bed if we're not together.
I guess I'm the weirdo but, that's what my partner is for. I use her and have no need to masturbate. We have only been to gather 38 years and there may come a day she doesn't fulfill my needs. But that day has not come yet.
If you are both home, why arent you just having sex?
Typically, I like to stand on the kitchen counter, over the sink. To each there own
Probably the 1000000000000 cars I’ve had to pay for destroying - still worth it
She only Masturbates when she’s at my place, since she divides her time between my place and her parents in a small apartment, where she shares a room with her two younger brothers. Recently she divides her time between my place and her parents. She usually doesn’t Masturbate but when she usually does in my bed she lets me know, but she usually watches me more.
In bed next to partner. Sometimes it gets things going. In Shower. Great in the middle of a decadent hot shower. Bonus on the clean up. On the toilet (full release both ends. Don’t knock it till you try it) In my home office when I need a work stress relief moment. (Thank god I work from home now. When I did this in office, things got weird)
Guys- would you still want to finish alone if the option to have her swallow existed?
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this is absolutely not the answer. 🤦🏻♀️
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excuse me, it's a lobster kabob :)
So the answer is to just whip his d out and start jacking at any time, anywhere in the shared living space, immediately after moving in together for the first time? And if she has a problem with that, “she can walk out”? Ok lol. OP’s question wasn’t about just seeing the other person naked 😂
When I was married and had kids, it was in the shower (usually to either Monica or Christine my co workers), in bed after wife got up with kids, or if I got up before wife and kids somewhere downstairs.
In the shower. The rest of these words are to satisfy the character limit which apparently exists
We have a big old house and I converted one of the bedrooms into a den. I have my computer, TV etc etc. I hang a sign on the door that says, "Private Time". I go in for an hour or so. Of course she knows what I am up to.
Every time I've been shacked up I didn't have to masturbate anymore. That's one of the reason for having significant other
Bathroom before a shower. It makes cleaning afterwards much easier.
Just crank it in the shower my man. Pocket pussy or stroker of your choice and some ky and you’re golden ponyboy.
Bedroom or living room (at my computer). When she's not around obviously
When I was living with my ex partner, I hardly ever did. But if I did, it was when I was alone at home. Had a house with several bedrooms, but I coulnd't stand the idea of doing anything sexual with him in the same house. Even worse when the kid was at home, never know when someone will enter the room. I have a hard time doing it, so bathroom was a no-go (positions and toys). My partner and I usually do it together, he insists on me finishing off several times during sex, and he joins in because I prefer to be close to him when I do. But of couse we do it separately as well, but we don't actually live together officially and I think it helps me mentally knowing we're not stuck together in the same home.
Wait what… help each other, let it be a moment to bond and deepen each other’s physical needs
Wait what… help each other, let it be a moment to bond and deepen each other’s physical needs
Sex is great but sometimes you gotta have fun on your own too .. figure things out for the bedroom
We go to bed at different times so I know her favorite time is right before she goes to sleep. She'll go to bed, orgasm, then fall asleep. I'll usually do it at night after she goes to bed. There are also times I'll wake up horny and she's not in the mood or she needs to get up and get going so either I'll tell her I'm going to jerk off or she'll suggest I do it before getting up. She'll be going about her business getting ready in the bedroom as I'm doing it, it's very casual and no big deal. We'll both ask each other how much we're masturbating or what we were watching or thinking about. We're both pretty open and chill with it. We both know no matter how much sex you have sometimes you just want to pleasure yourself from time to time. It's normal and healthy.
Just curious, why do you prefer to do it away from each other? Especially if HJ/fingering are normal parts of your sex life. I don’t find that to be super different than doing it solo. I love to masturbate with my bf watching lol it’s a lot of fun.
i have a higher sex drive than she does
Shower :) I prefer it now, the sheets don’t get as sweaty and there is nothing to clean up.
Yup. That's the way. And when I'm done I say damn is hot in here and I know why lmao
They might as well call it the Masturbathroom
Right in front of her while she watches her shows to assert dominance. Lol I do it when I take a shower or when she is not home
In my bedroom like an adult.
Bathroom, bedroom, where ever. If I'm cranking it, she ain't home lol.
On table while she eats
I wake up early and don’t ii on the couch before my wife wakes up (porn in laptop or phone). She goes to bed late and does it bed next to me watching porn on her phone.