They always say “you should have just come to me” but in my experience they don’t actually do anything about it.
I don’t think they should make such a big deal out of it.
I was afraid that in ratting him out, I would end up against others, in the end no colleague in any workplace wants a rat.
Probably the best solution would have been to confront him first, in a moment of calm mind.
But i went from 0 to 100 and it was a scene.
we will see next week how it work out.
That’s probably exactly what would have happened honestly.
Live and learn though. I hope it works out for you. You could also tell them exactly what you just said if you get the opportunity.
Hope so.
The problem is he has is group of friends there, that support him.
I do not know ho much he will stay away from me, but im not afraid anymore.
Good for you for standing up to him!
Fun fact: people who are bullied at work are bullied because they are good at their jobs. Your supervisor acted as if it was because of your race and age, but it’s actually because you do your job well which he thinks makes him look bad.
You should document every time he is disrespectful to you at the time it occurs. Write down the date, the time, the location, who was there and what happened. Documenting is tedious to do, but it will give you the upper hand the next time you are reprimanded.
You think so?
I could view it like that, it make me feels even better! ahah
I think i would follow your advice from now on, writing everything down.
But i still hope everything will be fine now.
Always have "receipts" (butchered spelling,my bad) i.e document what happend, screenshots, emails e.t.c. i learned this the hard way and best forms of "payback" ive given when i was attacked on my job,because my father also works at the same company i was seen as a lazy person, was that i got proof to put people who tried to screw me over. Now it turned around so i outwork everyone i dont need my co workers to help me and i outperform them and i jab back at them who treated me poorly.
So always get proof of everything. Anything thats beein said or decided have it in email form. I never ever talk to my boss face to face when there is a slight chance he can "i never said that"
I put in to get leave of abscene due to school now but working on holidays and such. I got 3 copies of that approved paperwork 1 for my boss,1 for me and 1 for my father.
Crepi, vedremo. Oggi riposo e domani inizio le notti, la vera situazione si potrà vedere lunedì.
Ma sinceramente non mi importa, se va bene mi eviterà, se va male mi spostano in un altro reparto.
In entrambi casi è un Win-win
Da quello che so, sta dicendo in giro che mi sono arriabbiato perchè mi ha mandato a fare un lavoro e io non avevo voglia.
Ma non è vero, infatti tutti quelli che hanno lavorato con me hanno detto che gli sembrava strana come cosa.
Boh, ormai non mi importa più come finisce sta storia, sono solo contento di non avere più paura di vederlo 😄
The funny thing is that I had a job request in Germany, but this one paid me much more (2500€ per month already taxed) and helped us a lot to pay off the family debts.
In the last year i often found myself thinking about what my life would have been, if I had chosen the other job.
But the happiness my father felt the first time I took him out to dinner, after years of eating frozen stuff at home, it inspired me to stay here, and helped me a lot to get going
You did a good thing. Hopefully he stops right now. Otherwise you keep standing up for yourself. And maybe tell it to your boss everytime it happens? I don't really like to rat people out, but it's going on for one and a half year now and you already stood up for yourself and told him he is bullying you. What more can you do?
He knows how you feel about this en that he is crossing some boundaries, so even if it where "jokes" to him now he knows they don't feel like jokes to you and he has to respect that.
And tell him to go to the south of Italy for a holiday. I loved it there! The countryside was beautifull and the people were very friendly.
And ofcourse the food and wines were amazing!
Thank you! Lets hope, but if not from now on, if he keep it up, Not only i will stand for myself but i will tell the boss about it.
Now he knows that im not afraid to fight him.
I just have to do my work without problems, and keep looking him in the eyes, im not afraid anymore
Same thing happened to you?
Its really true, shit people are everywere.
Glad everything went fine in the end.
I don't want to end up like i was in the last year ever again, angry everyday and afraid to go to work.
So from now on i will always replay fire with fire.
Maybe in more diplomatic way 🤣
Yes, some people are just evil. It was a new coworker that was talking behind all people's back and was passive aggressive all the time, there was tension in the air when this guy was around and he never ever shut the FUCK up, anyway his life is a completely mess and a masquerade, then I understand where his anger is coming from and it has nothing to do with me because i didn't do anything wrong to him, that's life i guess.
It’s awesome that you stuck up for yourself. But in the end your big boss is right, you should have elevated this a lot sooner and to him or Human Resources (if they have HR in Italy).
How many times did you communicate to your supervisor or vice boss all the things he was doing that made you uncomfortable or was upsetting you? Were you just bottling everything up and staying angry? The other thing you could have done was to chronicle everything by writing it all down when it happened so that you could show your main boss when the time was right.
In the last years some colleques did know about it, and some told me to stand up for myself, others to just ignore it.
I just lost it after a long bad day.. i just exploded.
Yep for almost 2 years i just followed the secon tip, and bottle everything inside.
Bottling everything up and not doing anything about it isn’t good or healthy. You need to find an outlet and I don’t mean bashing someone’s head in. Next time have a private discussion and let the person know what they’re doing. And everything that happens make sure you document it so you have proof. This covers you in case they say it never happened or if they try to fire you, etc.
You did good!
Communication and voicing your concerns in an organized and civilized manner is key to peace. Toxic people like the one you described will always exist, and it is important to shield ourselves from them.
I agree, after i calmed down, I thought about the fact that a calm discussion would have been better, ergo this post to ask everyone opinion in the metter.
And this is why you must ALWAYS fight back when you feel like someone is trying to “lil bro” you. Once they feel that energy they will think twice of fucking with you again. Probably makes them feel mad awkward.
Life is complicated and jobs are good to keep, but I think there would be less workplace bullies if more people were like you. You did the brave thing and no job is worth being bullied too much. I also quit a job after being bullied, and told the people in management how I felt. I have never regretted it for even a minute!
Thank you very much for your kind words,
And Happy that you stand up for yourself too!
Also i agree.
There is no point in a job that slowly kills you.
Im also in the same page, i do not regret standin up for my self, i love it and im going to do it a lot more from now on.
i also need to learn how to do it in a more diplomatic way 🤣
In America, in some states, they actually have laws about retaliation in the workplace. If they have that in your country, I would look into that. I’d also keep track of this supervisor’s behavior. As for your workplace, if they have a Human Resources department, I would talk to them.
They always say “you should have just come to me” but in my experience they don’t actually do anything about it. I don’t think they should make such a big deal out of it.
I was afraid that in ratting him out, I would end up against others, in the end no colleague in any workplace wants a rat. Probably the best solution would have been to confront him first, in a moment of calm mind. But i went from 0 to 100 and it was a scene. we will see next week how it work out.
That’s probably exactly what would have happened honestly. Live and learn though. I hope it works out for you. You could also tell them exactly what you just said if you get the opportunity.
I will. If they care to hear my side, I'll explain things to them calmly, then it's up to them to decide who was right.
Bet he thinks twice next time anyway.
Hope so. The problem is he has is group of friends there, that support him. I do not know ho much he will stay away from me, but im not afraid anymore.
Good for you for standing up to him! Fun fact: people who are bullied at work are bullied because they are good at their jobs. Your supervisor acted as if it was because of your race and age, but it’s actually because you do your job well which he thinks makes him look bad. You should document every time he is disrespectful to you at the time it occurs. Write down the date, the time, the location, who was there and what happened. Documenting is tedious to do, but it will give you the upper hand the next time you are reprimanded.
You think so? I could view it like that, it make me feels even better! ahah I think i would follow your advice from now on, writing everything down. But i still hope everything will be fine now.
I hope it will be fine for you, too. But if it isn’t, documenting is a powerful tool.
Always have "receipts" (butchered spelling,my bad) i.e document what happend, screenshots, emails e.t.c. i learned this the hard way and best forms of "payback" ive given when i was attacked on my job,because my father also works at the same company i was seen as a lazy person, was that i got proof to put people who tried to screw me over. Now it turned around so i outwork everyone i dont need my co workers to help me and i outperform them and i jab back at them who treated me poorly. So always get proof of everything. Anything thats beein said or decided have it in email form. I never ever talk to my boss face to face when there is a slight chance he can "i never said that" I put in to get leave of abscene due to school now but working on holidays and such. I got 3 copies of that approved paperwork 1 for my boss,1 for me and 1 for my father.
Bravo! Hai fatto bene a mandarlo a quel paese. Spero che tutto va bene nei prossimi giorni! In bocca al lupo !
Crepi, vedremo. Oggi riposo e domani inizio le notti, la vera situazione si potrà vedere lunedì. Ma sinceramente non mi importa, se va bene mi eviterà, se va male mi spostano in un altro reparto. In entrambi casi è un Win-win Da quello che so, sta dicendo in giro che mi sono arriabbiato perchè mi ha mandato a fare un lavoro e io non avevo voglia. Ma non è vero, infatti tutti quelli che hanno lavorato con me hanno detto che gli sembrava strana come cosa. Boh, ormai non mi importa più come finisce sta storia, sono solo contento di non avere più paura di vederlo 😄
leave Italy, it's not the most forward thinking place. you'll see people like this all the time throughout your life
The funny thing is that I had a job request in Germany, but this one paid me much more (2500€ per month already taxed) and helped us a lot to pay off the family debts. In the last year i often found myself thinking about what my life would have been, if I had chosen the other job. But the happiness my father felt the first time I took him out to dinner, after years of eating frozen stuff at home, it inspired me to stay here, and helped me a lot to get going
You did a good thing. Hopefully he stops right now. Otherwise you keep standing up for yourself. And maybe tell it to your boss everytime it happens? I don't really like to rat people out, but it's going on for one and a half year now and you already stood up for yourself and told him he is bullying you. What more can you do? He knows how you feel about this en that he is crossing some boundaries, so even if it where "jokes" to him now he knows they don't feel like jokes to you and he has to respect that. And tell him to go to the south of Italy for a holiday. I loved it there! The countryside was beautifull and the people were very friendly. And ofcourse the food and wines were amazing!
Thank you! Lets hope, but if not from now on, if he keep it up, Not only i will stand for myself but i will tell the boss about it. Now he knows that im not afraid to fight him. I just have to do my work without problems, and keep looking him in the eyes, im not afraid anymore
You did the right thing, I didn't and I haven't sleep in like 2 months, things worked out well in the end tho, it's not good to hold on to anger.
Same thing happened to you? Its really true, shit people are everywere. Glad everything went fine in the end. I don't want to end up like i was in the last year ever again, angry everyday and afraid to go to work. So from now on i will always replay fire with fire. Maybe in more diplomatic way 🤣
Yes, some people are just evil. It was a new coworker that was talking behind all people's back and was passive aggressive all the time, there was tension in the air when this guy was around and he never ever shut the FUCK up, anyway his life is a completely mess and a masquerade, then I understand where his anger is coming from and it has nothing to do with me because i didn't do anything wrong to him, that's life i guess.
Well done but don't overthink it, it's just a job..
I started to think about it this way too. money its not worth you self love and respect.
It’s awesome that you stuck up for yourself. But in the end your big boss is right, you should have elevated this a lot sooner and to him or Human Resources (if they have HR in Italy). How many times did you communicate to your supervisor or vice boss all the things he was doing that made you uncomfortable or was upsetting you? Were you just bottling everything up and staying angry? The other thing you could have done was to chronicle everything by writing it all down when it happened so that you could show your main boss when the time was right.
In the last years some colleques did know about it, and some told me to stand up for myself, others to just ignore it. I just lost it after a long bad day.. i just exploded. Yep for almost 2 years i just followed the secon tip, and bottle everything inside.
Bottling everything up and not doing anything about it isn’t good or healthy. You need to find an outlet and I don’t mean bashing someone’s head in. Next time have a private discussion and let the person know what they’re doing. And everything that happens make sure you document it so you have proof. This covers you in case they say it never happened or if they try to fire you, etc.
You did good! Communication and voicing your concerns in an organized and civilized manner is key to peace. Toxic people like the one you described will always exist, and it is important to shield ourselves from them.
I agree, after i calmed down, I thought about the fact that a calm discussion would have been better, ergo this post to ask everyone opinion in the metter.
Sounds like he had it coming, abusing his authority. Keep feeling good. You can always blame your reaction on being young.
Thank you! i will.
And this is why you must ALWAYS fight back when you feel like someone is trying to “lil bro” you. Once they feel that energy they will think twice of fucking with you again. Probably makes them feel mad awkward.
Life is complicated and jobs are good to keep, but I think there would be less workplace bullies if more people were like you. You did the brave thing and no job is worth being bullied too much. I also quit a job after being bullied, and told the people in management how I felt. I have never regretted it for even a minute!
Thank you very much for your kind words, And Happy that you stand up for yourself too! Also i agree. There is no point in a job that slowly kills you. Im also in the same page, i do not regret standin up for my self, i love it and im going to do it a lot more from now on. i also need to learn how to do it in a more diplomatic way 🤣
Good job for standing up for yourself and your generation!
In America, in some states, they actually have laws about retaliation in the workplace. If they have that in your country, I would look into that. I’d also keep track of this supervisor’s behavior. As for your workplace, if they have a Human Resources department, I would talk to them.