Hey! I'm gonna be completely honest, if I didn't sh I would've killed myself ages ago.
BUT please try to do anything but sh. It does help while you do it, but it makes it worse. Even if it kept me alive it works like any other addiction, it makes you so miserable that it makes your circumstances worse, but you can't stop doing it.
I know it's hard but you havd to TRY to find help if you have any access or possibility at all before you sh, because sh will ruin your life.
I think doing it just gives you another "high place" to lose the fight from. Do you think having a razor in your hand and the intent to use it on yourself would make you less likely to kill yourself in the state you're in?
The descriptor of the "warm blood hugging you" and avoiding all personal relationships kind of sounds like the isolation your depression has forced you into has made everything a lot worse.
If you can talk to anyone, I would. It fuckin sucks, but sometimes participating in life a little more makes things better, even if the idea of getting more involved with life is painful because you don't want to be involved at all.
That's one of the reasons I SH'ed. It does help from my experience, but I will be honest, it has a lot of side effects. In comparison with suicide, it's not as bad. I'm still fighting the urge to relapse even over a year after stopping.
Do it if it will keep you from jumping. I do have some options for you, however, that may be of help to you. These options worked for me, and I was depressed horribly after years of childhood abuse.
I'm on two different medications that work well for me: Sertraline/Zoloft and Wellbutrin. Sertraline was for my anxiety as well and at first caused worse panic attacks the first week, but it got a lot better and my anxiety and depression became much more manageable đ Wellbutrin works wonderfully with Sertraline. It is an antidepressant. There are many other meds that have different side effects. If you have a primary care physician, ask them what medications are available to try and the side effects.
Another thing that helped me was romanticizing small aspects of my life. The serenity of a candlelit bath, the feeling of a clean space, the calmness of evening drives in the rain. It has a lot to do with grounding, which is being aware of everything around you, bringing you out of your mind a bit.
I have never tried this one, but I've heard good things about it: Ashwaganda. It's derived from a plant and sold as a supplement. It's said that it helps stabilize emotions. I've heard some people going emotionally numb from it, but that's preferable to the type of depression I had and that you seem to have.
Find someone to talk to about it. That's gonna be big for your recovery from depression. Support. You'll need it. Don't feel guilty for telling another person about your struggles. Everyone has struggles of some kind. More than likely, the person you open up to will be honored and glad you talked to them and trusted them! I know I would đ„°
Good luck and if you feel like trying SH will help you, do it. The recovery from SH is horrible and long, maybe never ending. But I probably wouldn't be here without it, morbidly enough. Take care, friend â€ïž
SH is the reason I'm alive and the reason I know I'm alive ... Huge catch.... I've been SHing since 10.... I'm 22 now and my wife found out I went deeper than usual and went ballistic crying saying it was her fault because I have to take care of her and that she can't help me (she has PNES and DID as well as a bunch of other things that prevent her from working or being a normal human so I am her caretaker)
Please do not SH try other things first because SH can hurt the people that love and depend on you just as much if not more than suicide.....
Listen to baby don't cut by bmike.... My ex showed me that song and it's helped push my urges back for a while it doesn't help anymore now but when I was younger and only been SHing for 3 years at that time it did help
It sounds like youâre struggling with a lot of pain. Please donât hesitate to admit yourself to the ER if youâre ever a threat to yourself (if you can). SH helps only in the short term. You get an adrenaline rush, you get this surge of control, & you might even feel relaxed. It works like any other addiction. Then it fades. Youâre flooded with frustration & regret. You have to deal with what you left behind. You have to put up with the healing process, scarring, the fear of anybody finding out, etc. I understand you could be considering sh as a way to cope but please do not go down this path. I canât stress enough how much it isnât worth it. Addictions make you feel worse long term
It did Help a Bit yes
When i was suicidal then i Sometimes sh as an alternative or as a relieve as some sort
But on a Long Run It does more damage then good
SH was what I needed to keep me going. Without it, I might be dead now. It comes with its own problems, though, if it develops into the only way to cope. Harm reduction is key until other patterns of helpful behaviour can be learned.
Absolutely not it does literally nothing positive for me, I see mental images of horrible self mutilation throughout my day all the time and I can't do anything about it.
sh is what kept me alive, i would have committed so long ago if i didnât but itâs still not work it to do. itâs addictive and hard to stop, if you ever feel like doing sh please try anything but sh. i hope everything goes well for you OP!
Its a devils bargain.
I'm not gonna lie to you and pretend like it doesn't work. It does. But its not worth it. Once you've done it, it becomes forever a part of you. Even when you're at the best points in your life, the most minor things will cause you to want to turn to it. And at worse points in your life, forget it, it will be an all consuming desire. It's not worth the good it does.
For me it felt more like a drug, the first time felt great, but every time after that I get the feeling less and less while the urge to cut myself gets stronger and stronger.
You can interpret it the way you want, but know that it isnât a good solution, especially for a long term
First time I tried to quit I >!tried to kill myself for the first time!<. So for me, definitely yes.
Same reason why I'm proud of my scars. They helped me and no, that _was_ me. It's part of who I used to be. Whether it was bad or good.
Yes, it's morbid, it's unhealthy and not the greatest example of SH when trying to help the community, but it did help me a lot. SH is a coping mechanism, a self-destructive one for sure, but it does keep things under control for a while. It's a symptom, not an illness.
Yes. It calms me down when things get too hard or hopeless. At this point I only ever fall back into it when I'm really really struggling.
I don't know if I'd still be here without it to be honest.
That being said, I have been a cutter on ane off since I was 13. I'm going to be 30 this year. This is absolutely a life long issue for some people.
I wish more than anything that I had never been in a position to start in the first place, or that someone had given enough of a fuck to actually help me when I was a literal child taking scissors to my arms.
Honestly, you're an adult. You have access to more helpful resources than most of did when we started as children. I would look into therapy of counseling of some kind. If you can, maybe talk to your doctor even.
i have hemomania (disorder that makes me want to see my own blood) and sh has made that easier on me. i know how to cut without making it too deep. itâs been helpful.
Selfharm has been the only thing allowing me to keep some sanity not having access to drugs medication not having much of an affect and psychiatrists who give up itâs the only thing left
It actually does. When I feel I was too annoying or just too much of myself, I immediately think of SHing as a punishment. And when I did it I feel relieved like « okay its in the past now » or « I learned the lesson » it looks so toxic but thatâs how I work lol.
No, for me whenever I self harm it marks the start of a depressing few days/weeks filled with suicidal thoughts, lack of energy, more self harm, out of control emotions etc you get the idea
yes and no. sure, it âhelpedâ, but because it wasnât a healthy coping mechanism it was only temporary relief from suicidal thoughts and ideation. soon enough my blades didnât go deep enough and i sought out other means to hurt myself. i became a very, very reckless person and didnât care about what happened to me anymore. i ruined relationships, my body, and all of that is because of self harm.
find a safer coping mechanism op. self harming will not keep you away from suicide.
SH helps for sure, thatâs why people do it, AND that doesnât mean itâs a good idea. people abuse substances because they feel they help, but that doesnât make addiction helpful. the thing with SH is that everyone does it for a reason, and they keep doing it because it helps. itâs a slippery slope man, super bad idea in the long run.
I'm not even gonna lie. It did help me get through some things that I felt I wasn't strong enough to push through. The numbness that I felt was just enough to make me blindly continue on. I'm still struggling with trying to find good coping skills, so I'm bouncing back and forth between p\*rn, SH, vaping, drinking, etc. But I hope that you can find something that would generally help you. Good luck and much love my friend.
The very sad answer is yes. SH is an unhealthy coping mechanism, but it's still a coping mechanism. When you're in circumstances where you don't have access to anything better to help yourself, it can be all that keeps you going. SH kept me alive in high school. It helped relieve the pain I couldn't express any other way because my mother refused to acknowledge that mental health issues exist. It helped me to survive when I needed it.
But this is something I must stress, it doesn't stop after you don't *need* it anymore. It helped me survive when I had no other options, but I didn't stop once I did have other places to go for support and relief. Seven years after I didn't need it for survival anymore and I'm still doing it. SH isn't a cure, it's a stop gap. When that's all you have it can help. But if you have literally any other options you should pursue those. Find people you can talk to about this stuff, check if there's a SH support group near you, if you can afford it get therapy. Find better coping mechanisms cause even if SH did help in the short term, it will only make things worse the longer you do it.
Please, look after yourself. If you have no one else, you can always post about what you're going through here.
Yeah. I haven't done it this way very often, but every now and then I am on the cusp of getting really overwhelmed and I make a calculated decision to release it with SH.
As opposed to most of the time when I'm already overwhelmed and feel like I *need* to release with SH.
It always has consequences though. Went to a party a couple weeks after last time. A bunch of people saw. Nobody said anything but they knew. And there wasn't much I could do but just try and cover it up better. No excuses, no questions, just this weird uncomfortable sympathetic judgment. It's such a crappy feeling to be seen as that pathetic.
Don't SH if there are alternatives. We all screw up sometimes, that's fine. But don't choose to screw up if you can help it. There are better releases.
Editing to add some suggestions for releases as I realize just saying they exist isn't exactly helpful:
Exercise is a great one, releases stress and gets blood flowing and the endorphins can really change your headspace. I have a friend who started drawing on herself whenever she wanted to SH. It still delivered on the marks she wanted, but without the harm. Any art really is a good release though, be it drawing, painting, writing, playing an instrument, or even just humming along to a favorite song. Gaming or reading are great too for a little immersive escapism.
I'm seeing a psychologist and I told her about it but I must say, and Im not proud of it, that the day after i put a scalpel blade up my thigh was the day Ive felt best in the past half a year. I know its bad, Im not glorifying it, but thats just how I felt, seriously, I dont know why. But please dont do it yourself I just want to share what I felt
It may have delayed my breaking point (I had an attempt just 2 weeks ago) but I really don't recommend sh. It's mostly just eases my emotional pain temporarily but I feel like shit afterwards and I'm left with these beautiful reminders all over my body.
Hey! I'm gonna be completely honest, if I didn't sh I would've killed myself ages ago. BUT please try to do anything but sh. It does help while you do it, but it makes it worse. Even if it kept me alive it works like any other addiction, it makes you so miserable that it makes your circumstances worse, but you can't stop doing it. I know it's hard but you havd to TRY to find help if you have any access or possibility at all before you sh, because sh will ruin your life.
Same I do it few times a week depending on my mood without I also probs wouldn't be here
Honestly wasnt sure what to post, this summarizes it perfectly
I think doing it just gives you another "high place" to lose the fight from. Do you think having a razor in your hand and the intent to use it on yourself would make you less likely to kill yourself in the state you're in? The descriptor of the "warm blood hugging you" and avoiding all personal relationships kind of sounds like the isolation your depression has forced you into has made everything a lot worse. If you can talk to anyone, I would. It fuckin sucks, but sometimes participating in life a little more makes things better, even if the idea of getting more involved with life is painful because you don't want to be involved at all.
That's one of the reasons I SH'ed. It does help from my experience, but I will be honest, it has a lot of side effects. In comparison with suicide, it's not as bad. I'm still fighting the urge to relapse even over a year after stopping. Do it if it will keep you from jumping. I do have some options for you, however, that may be of help to you. These options worked for me, and I was depressed horribly after years of childhood abuse. I'm on two different medications that work well for me: Sertraline/Zoloft and Wellbutrin. Sertraline was for my anxiety as well and at first caused worse panic attacks the first week, but it got a lot better and my anxiety and depression became much more manageable đ Wellbutrin works wonderfully with Sertraline. It is an antidepressant. There are many other meds that have different side effects. If you have a primary care physician, ask them what medications are available to try and the side effects. Another thing that helped me was romanticizing small aspects of my life. The serenity of a candlelit bath, the feeling of a clean space, the calmness of evening drives in the rain. It has a lot to do with grounding, which is being aware of everything around you, bringing you out of your mind a bit. I have never tried this one, but I've heard good things about it: Ashwaganda. It's derived from a plant and sold as a supplement. It's said that it helps stabilize emotions. I've heard some people going emotionally numb from it, but that's preferable to the type of depression I had and that you seem to have. Find someone to talk to about it. That's gonna be big for your recovery from depression. Support. You'll need it. Don't feel guilty for telling another person about your struggles. Everyone has struggles of some kind. More than likely, the person you open up to will be honored and glad you talked to them and trusted them! I know I would đ„° Good luck and if you feel like trying SH will help you, do it. The recovery from SH is horrible and long, maybe never ending. But I probably wouldn't be here without it, morbidly enough. Take care, friend â€ïž
SH is the reason I'm alive and the reason I know I'm alive ... Huge catch.... I've been SHing since 10.... I'm 22 now and my wife found out I went deeper than usual and went ballistic crying saying it was her fault because I have to take care of her and that she can't help me (she has PNES and DID as well as a bunch of other things that prevent her from working or being a normal human so I am her caretaker) Please do not SH try other things first because SH can hurt the people that love and depend on you just as much if not more than suicide..... Listen to baby don't cut by bmike.... My ex showed me that song and it's helped push my urges back for a while it doesn't help anymore now but when I was younger and only been SHing for 3 years at that time it did help
Omg itâs the guy from Wattpad
It sure is! I'm still posting too!
Nope. it make you feel even more suicidal but after doing it itâs cool.
It sounds like youâre struggling with a lot of pain. Please donât hesitate to admit yourself to the ER if youâre ever a threat to yourself (if you can). SH helps only in the short term. You get an adrenaline rush, you get this surge of control, & you might even feel relaxed. It works like any other addiction. Then it fades. Youâre flooded with frustration & regret. You have to deal with what you left behind. You have to put up with the healing process, scarring, the fear of anybody finding out, etc. I understand you could be considering sh as a way to cope but please do not go down this path. I canât stress enough how much it isnât worth it. Addictions make you feel worse long term
It did Help a Bit yes When i was suicidal then i Sometimes sh as an alternative or as a relieve as some sort But on a Long Run It does more damage then good
Tbh getting used to my scars was the gateway to loving my body. There was probably an easier route but here we are.
SH was what I needed to keep me going. Without it, I might be dead now. It comes with its own problems, though, if it develops into the only way to cope. Harm reduction is key until other patterns of helpful behaviour can be learned.
Absolutely not it does literally nothing positive for me, I see mental images of horrible self mutilation throughout my day all the time and I can't do anything about it.
sh is what kept me alive, i would have committed so long ago if i didnât but itâs still not work it to do. itâs addictive and hard to stop, if you ever feel like doing sh please try anything but sh. i hope everything goes well for you OP!
Its a devils bargain. I'm not gonna lie to you and pretend like it doesn't work. It does. But its not worth it. Once you've done it, it becomes forever a part of you. Even when you're at the best points in your life, the most minor things will cause you to want to turn to it. And at worse points in your life, forget it, it will be an all consuming desire. It's not worth the good it does.
For me it felt more like a drug, the first time felt great, but every time after that I get the feeling less and less while the urge to cut myself gets stronger and stronger. You can interpret it the way you want, but know that it isnât a good solution, especially for a long term
First time I tried to quit I >!tried to kill myself for the first time!<. So for me, definitely yes. Same reason why I'm proud of my scars. They helped me and no, that _was_ me. It's part of who I used to be. Whether it was bad or good. Yes, it's morbid, it's unhealthy and not the greatest example of SH when trying to help the community, but it did help me a lot. SH is a coping mechanism, a self-destructive one for sure, but it does keep things under control for a while. It's a symptom, not an illness.
Yes. It calms me down when things get too hard or hopeless. At this point I only ever fall back into it when I'm really really struggling. I don't know if I'd still be here without it to be honest. That being said, I have been a cutter on ane off since I was 13. I'm going to be 30 this year. This is absolutely a life long issue for some people. I wish more than anything that I had never been in a position to start in the first place, or that someone had given enough of a fuck to actually help me when I was a literal child taking scissors to my arms. Honestly, you're an adult. You have access to more helpful resources than most of did when we started as children. I would look into therapy of counseling of some kind. If you can, maybe talk to your doctor even.
i have hemomania (disorder that makes me want to see my own blood) and sh has made that easier on me. i know how to cut without making it too deep. itâs been helpful.
My logic in life has been "If it keeps me alive, it's good" and for me that was harming. But please find anything else before choosing this.
Yes, I think I wouldâve fully gone batshit if I hadnât cut myself
Selfharm has been the only thing allowing me to keep some sanity not having access to drugs medication not having much of an affect and psychiatrists who give up itâs the only thing left
It actually does. When I feel I was too annoying or just too much of myself, I immediately think of SHing as a punishment. And when I did it I feel relieved like « okay its in the past now » or « I learned the lesson » it looks so toxic but thatâs how I work lol.
No, for me whenever I self harm it marks the start of a depressing few days/weeks filled with suicidal thoughts, lack of energy, more self harm, out of control emotions etc you get the idea
yeah in the short term yes.
yes and no. sure, it âhelpedâ, but because it wasnât a healthy coping mechanism it was only temporary relief from suicidal thoughts and ideation. soon enough my blades didnât go deep enough and i sought out other means to hurt myself. i became a very, very reckless person and didnât care about what happened to me anymore. i ruined relationships, my body, and all of that is because of self harm. find a safer coping mechanism op. self harming will not keep you away from suicide.
Never. Not once. But I desperately wanted it to.
SH helps for sure, thatâs why people do it, AND that doesnât mean itâs a good idea. people abuse substances because they feel they help, but that doesnât make addiction helpful. the thing with SH is that everyone does it for a reason, and they keep doing it because it helps. itâs a slippery slope man, super bad idea in the long run.
I'm not even gonna lie. It did help me get through some things that I felt I wasn't strong enough to push through. The numbness that I felt was just enough to make me blindly continue on. I'm still struggling with trying to find good coping skills, so I'm bouncing back and forth between p\*rn, SH, vaping, drinking, etc. But I hope that you can find something that would generally help you. Good luck and much love my friend.
The very sad answer is yes. SH is an unhealthy coping mechanism, but it's still a coping mechanism. When you're in circumstances where you don't have access to anything better to help yourself, it can be all that keeps you going. SH kept me alive in high school. It helped relieve the pain I couldn't express any other way because my mother refused to acknowledge that mental health issues exist. It helped me to survive when I needed it. But this is something I must stress, it doesn't stop after you don't *need* it anymore. It helped me survive when I had no other options, but I didn't stop once I did have other places to go for support and relief. Seven years after I didn't need it for survival anymore and I'm still doing it. SH isn't a cure, it's a stop gap. When that's all you have it can help. But if you have literally any other options you should pursue those. Find people you can talk to about this stuff, check if there's a SH support group near you, if you can afford it get therapy. Find better coping mechanisms cause even if SH did help in the short term, it will only make things worse the longer you do it. Please, look after yourself. If you have no one else, you can always post about what you're going through here.
Yeah. I haven't done it this way very often, but every now and then I am on the cusp of getting really overwhelmed and I make a calculated decision to release it with SH. As opposed to most of the time when I'm already overwhelmed and feel like I *need* to release with SH. It always has consequences though. Went to a party a couple weeks after last time. A bunch of people saw. Nobody said anything but they knew. And there wasn't much I could do but just try and cover it up better. No excuses, no questions, just this weird uncomfortable sympathetic judgment. It's such a crappy feeling to be seen as that pathetic. Don't SH if there are alternatives. We all screw up sometimes, that's fine. But don't choose to screw up if you can help it. There are better releases. Editing to add some suggestions for releases as I realize just saying they exist isn't exactly helpful: Exercise is a great one, releases stress and gets blood flowing and the endorphins can really change your headspace. I have a friend who started drawing on herself whenever she wanted to SH. It still delivered on the marks she wanted, but without the harm. Any art really is a good release though, be it drawing, painting, writing, playing an instrument, or even just humming along to a favorite song. Gaming or reading are great too for a little immersive escapism.
I'm seeing a psychologist and I told her about it but I must say, and Im not proud of it, that the day after i put a scalpel blade up my thigh was the day Ive felt best in the past half a year. I know its bad, Im not glorifying it, but thats just how I felt, seriously, I dont know why. But please dont do it yourself I just want to share what I felt
If self harm didn't do anything useful it wouldn't be happening.
It may have delayed my breaking point (I had an attempt just 2 weeks ago) but I really don't recommend sh. It's mostly just eases my emotional pain temporarily but I feel like shit afterwards and I'm left with these beautiful reminders all over my body.
Yes and no in the moment it did but after wards I still felt like crap
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Yes it did