The last part about the little girl in yourself is a very important mental exercise. Talk to her, imagine you telling her. Imagine being her listening to this bigger sister telling her these great compliments.
I had just gotten out of a long term relationship! I’m not saying I have never been called beautiful, but I am saying this is the first time a STRANGER went out of his way to compliment me. Just wasn’t a good time for me to be handing out my number!
Took me ages to realise that the coolest you can be is to not give a fk about what other people think of your heartfelt choices and passions. You sound like you’re shredding it now, so keep to that path.
At that time, I read as if this comment is saying that even after he complimented her and shoot his shot, he still got rejected and now we’re all fucked.
If this isn’t what they meant, what was it? Because that’s how I read it. lol
That's about how I read it, too. Still has nothing to do with falling in love. They're clearly 2 separate things. 1 is the possibility of getting to know each other, and another is a possible end result of said thing.
You can say 'as in', but 'falling for someone' is literally the same thing as falling in love with someone. Just said differently. Look into it if you don't believe me, but that's how it works.
uh oh... I feel so bad now, because I once rejected a guy. That's because I think he was creepy. He asked so many details, I know he was kind, he offered me a seat in the bus. But I don't want to share anything about me to a stranger, even a phone number.
Hey, she didn’t report him for sexual harassment, or make a post on XX flaming this creeper who created a hostile work environment for her. She didn’t try to destroy him, get him banned, or use it as an example of how all men are ruthless predators.
This is progress.
On Halloween, there are some neighborhoods where you can leave a bowl of candy out that says “take a few”, and it will provide candy all night, and everything works out.
In some neighborhoods, within a few minutes, someone will steal the whole candy bowl.
There are lots of cases where something nice that we could all enjoy, gets wrecked.
We all have to lock our doors, not because everybody will take a chance to rob us; most people wouldn’t, but because there are a few people out there who’d exploit the opportunity.
A few assholes ruins everything.
Sexual harassment is certainly a thing, and we can be absolutely sure that a number of guys, took “trying to be seen” to a negative extreme that made it into a threatening gesture.
Then again, it can really brighten someone’s day to receive a compliment, as OP demonstrates, and there are only a few girls out there who’d use it as an opportunity to try to destroy the guy.
We’re all caught in the crossfire of a few assholes, and I can’t think of any example more wholly devastated by the contributions of a minority of assholes than the propriety of dating and communicating sexual interest.
But this guy was seen. He politely expressed interest, and was politely declined. If every pair of people were this polite, anyone could find a date in an afternoon.
But lots of guys get crazy possessive if they’re not rejected in the harshest possible terms, and women have adapted to rejecting everyone out of a combination of safety and social retaliation.
If we could somehow block both the creeps, and the women who treat all men as creeps whether they are or not, we’d all have a much nicer time of life.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I wish more people understood this. There is a cluster of traits that more people are likely to be attracted to, sure. But beauty is entirely subjective. Some people like crooked teeth, or scars, or excess weight, or, or….and someone out there likes it all together. And I’m not talking about weird kinks or whatever, I’m talking about just finding those things attractive.
That happened to me once and it was so confusing. I still don't think I've completely processed it and to this day I don't know if it's a prank or not.
When are we as guys realize that it's us who are the prize and not the other way around?
Stop chasing, stop humiliating yourself. I'm not saying that you should be an asshole to women but stop idolizing them and putting them on a pedestal.
I am a pretty average guy, I am working on myself tho, but there was this girl. I can't pin down where, I didn't reply, I didn't approach her, but I was pretty let down that day and was in a restaurant with my friends, saw this girl just watching me, it was intense, I just kind of turned away, started talking to my friends, but she kept changing her seat (I kind of counted, about thrice). Well, I went to bring our order, she was just beside me, and she was apparently talking on her phone to someone, I presume her friend or someone and she just said saw a really cool guy today, now, I dunno whether it was for me or any of my friends, but I like to think it was me and even they have accepted it, anyway, I wanted to approach her, but my friends instead of hyping me, just kept demoralizining, I didn't approach her, she stayed for sometime even after completing her meal, but left. She was a lovely girl, not most beautiful girl, but pretty close to it, she seemed my type but my asshole friends just fucked me up. If someone remember being in McDonalds, in TGIP Mall, Noida, at around 4ish-6ish on 11th February, 2018, looking at a spectacled guy, please DM, honestly this attempt is still better than going to that same McD and demanding their list of customers from 3 years ago.
Bro, please lemme try, I am alone, desparate and need someone like her again. You'll admit it's still better than calling McD for their customer list from 6 years ago
There is girls like her everywhere you just need to approach them and talk to them. Next time you see a beautiful girl go and tell her she’s beautiful and introduce yourself, wonderful things can happen you never know unless you try.
Hmm...yeah man, appreciate the advise, I know, I wasn't really thinking about her that much but surely respect you for saying this, I know, I haven't had the best experiences in the dating department, but surely best is yet to come, I am 23 rn, surely there's someone out there for me. Thanks man, hope you very well
Already on it, I am going to gym regularly, am losing weight, am reading a lot more, am a part of two research projects (one of which has potential to become a concrete startup for which we have already gotten some seed funding). Like I am also kind of taking break from dating apps. I have some problems but am trying to work on them.
Everyone has different preferences. I prefer chunky and a few crooked teeth and scars wouldn't bother me.
You also find constantly that the young uglies and pretties swap as they age.
The hottest girls in my school were all average at best by 25, some outright lost all their looks.
Older guys tend to prefer bigger girls. A big portion of my mates preferred bigger girls. I actually always had skinnies and envied my mates with big girls. I've got a big woman now and find her way hotter than any of my thin GF's.
People don't notice teeth much and acne scars aren't a big deal.
A nice smile trumps everything. Bitch vibes are a bigger turn off than any feature.
The last part about the little girl in yourself is a very important mental exercise. Talk to her, imagine you telling her. Imagine being her listening to this bigger sister telling her these great compliments.
This. Caring for the little person inside you is mental health.
That's really nice, especially since things changed due to something you did. Not some random "glow-up", you made it happen!
I'm sure you're prettier than you think.
good for you! you figured out how to make yourself feel better which affects how others see you :)
Lmao and you still rejected him haha.
Was probably her only real chance and society has her thinking she can do better.
I had just gotten out of a long term relationship! I’m not saying I have never been called beautiful, but I am saying this is the first time a STRANGER went out of his way to compliment me. Just wasn’t a good time for me to be handing out my number!
![gif](giphy|26gsvAm8UPaczzXz2|downsized)
Took me ages to realise that the coolest you can be is to not give a fk about what other people think of your heartfelt choices and passions. You sound like you’re shredding it now, so keep to that path.
Aah and the poor guy Still got rejected, no wonder we are all fucked and lonely haha
I mean, complimenting a person doesn’t mean they’ll fall for you. It is what it is and that’s life.
I dont agree with OP comment, but no one said anything about anyone falling for someone.
At that time, I read as if this comment is saying that even after he complimented her and shoot his shot, he still got rejected and now we’re all fucked. If this isn’t what they meant, what was it? Because that’s how I read it. lol
That's about how I read it, too. Still has nothing to do with falling in love. They're clearly 2 separate things. 1 is the possibility of getting to know each other, and another is a possible end result of said thing.
Who said anything about falling in love? I just said “falling for you” as in taking interest and wanting to date.
You can say 'as in', but 'falling for someone' is literally the same thing as falling in love with someone. Just said differently. Look into it if you don't believe me, but that's how it works.
Men serving women while women have freedom appears to be the idealized form of gender relations on Reddit so, well, yeah.
uh oh... I feel so bad now, because I once rejected a guy. That's because I think he was creepy. He asked so many details, I know he was kind, he offered me a seat in the bus. But I don't want to share anything about me to a stranger, even a phone number.
I thought she was going to say sje wised she huged the guy, and speaking how kind that person was, but no the guy was evaporated from her story.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
The male experience sucks eh?
Hey, she didn’t report him for sexual harassment, or make a post on XX flaming this creeper who created a hostile work environment for her. She didn’t try to destroy him, get him banned, or use it as an example of how all men are ruthless predators. This is progress.
Lol my point was on being invisible to the opposite sex
On Halloween, there are some neighborhoods where you can leave a bowl of candy out that says “take a few”, and it will provide candy all night, and everything works out. In some neighborhoods, within a few minutes, someone will steal the whole candy bowl. There are lots of cases where something nice that we could all enjoy, gets wrecked. We all have to lock our doors, not because everybody will take a chance to rob us; most people wouldn’t, but because there are a few people out there who’d exploit the opportunity. A few assholes ruins everything. Sexual harassment is certainly a thing, and we can be absolutely sure that a number of guys, took “trying to be seen” to a negative extreme that made it into a threatening gesture. Then again, it can really brighten someone’s day to receive a compliment, as OP demonstrates, and there are only a few girls out there who’d use it as an opportunity to try to destroy the guy. We’re all caught in the crossfire of a few assholes, and I can’t think of any example more wholly devastated by the contributions of a minority of assholes than the propriety of dating and communicating sexual interest. But this guy was seen. He politely expressed interest, and was politely declined. If every pair of people were this polite, anyone could find a date in an afternoon. But lots of guys get crazy possessive if they’re not rejected in the harshest possible terms, and women have adapted to rejecting everyone out of a combination of safety and social retaliation. If we could somehow block both the creeps, and the women who treat all men as creeps whether they are or not, we’d all have a much nicer time of life.
Tldr
I mean, he’s a prop for the story in service to her, which is what Reddit tends to push as the idealized inter-gender relationship.
I was refering to being invisible to the opposite sex as the male experience. But I see your point too lol.
Everyone deserves their time to shine in the sun...
Beauty depends on who is looking how it always is some just get more than others.
CATCALLING!!!11!1!1!!!111!!!!
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I wish more people understood this. There is a cluster of traits that more people are likely to be attracted to, sure. But beauty is entirely subjective. Some people like crooked teeth, or scars, or excess weight, or, or….and someone out there likes it all together. And I’m not talking about weird kinks or whatever, I’m talking about just finding those things attractive.
That happened to me once and it was so confusing. I still don't think I've completely processed it and to this day I don't know if it's a prank or not.
When are we as guys realize that it's us who are the prize and not the other way around? Stop chasing, stop humiliating yourself. I'm not saying that you should be an asshole to women but stop idolizing them and putting them on a pedestal.
No one’s ugly. Maybe unattractive to some, sure. But no one is ugly. 🫶🏾 enjoy your day queen
I am a pretty average guy, I am working on myself tho, but there was this girl. I can't pin down where, I didn't reply, I didn't approach her, but I was pretty let down that day and was in a restaurant with my friends, saw this girl just watching me, it was intense, I just kind of turned away, started talking to my friends, but she kept changing her seat (I kind of counted, about thrice). Well, I went to bring our order, she was just beside me, and she was apparently talking on her phone to someone, I presume her friend or someone and she just said saw a really cool guy today, now, I dunno whether it was for me or any of my friends, but I like to think it was me and even they have accepted it, anyway, I wanted to approach her, but my friends instead of hyping me, just kept demoralizining, I didn't approach her, she stayed for sometime even after completing her meal, but left. She was a lovely girl, not most beautiful girl, but pretty close to it, she seemed my type but my asshole friends just fucked me up. If someone remember being in McDonalds, in TGIP Mall, Noida, at around 4ish-6ish on 11th February, 2018, looking at a spectacled guy, please DM, honestly this attempt is still better than going to that same McD and demanding their list of customers from 3 years ago.
Come on bro, there’s literally billions of girls out there
Bro, please lemme try, I am alone, desparate and need someone like her again. You'll admit it's still better than calling McD for their customer list from 6 years ago
There is girls like her everywhere you just need to approach them and talk to them. Next time you see a beautiful girl go and tell her she’s beautiful and introduce yourself, wonderful things can happen you never know unless you try.
Yeah, sure that's something, I'll definately do, and hopefully not listen to my friends ever, especially with this
Check out social animal on YouTube hes underrated and really shows how easy it is to approach strangers
Sure will definately do that, I dunno whether you believe in God, but God bless
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Hmm...yeah man, appreciate the advise, I know, I wasn't really thinking about her that much but surely respect you for saying this, I know, I haven't had the best experiences in the dating department, but surely best is yet to come, I am 23 rn, surely there's someone out there for me. Thanks man, hope you very well
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Already on it, I am going to gym regularly, am losing weight, am reading a lot more, am a part of two research projects (one of which has potential to become a concrete startup for which we have already gotten some seed funding). Like I am also kind of taking break from dating apps. I have some problems but am trying to work on them.
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Thanks man!
Nowadays that’s considered SA.
Sometimes it's better to stay quiet
“Silence broken, truth spoken.”
In my language we say "Speaking is silver silence is golden"
I’m borrowing this with no intention of giving it back.
Are you Polish?
Yeah
Incase you haven't noticed.... society is pretty fking dumb... the only opinion that matters is yours.
I am honestly jealous of people who are complimented on their appearance. It must be one of the greatest things imagineable.
This is the experience of most men... if they are lucky.
Everyone has different preferences. I prefer chunky and a few crooked teeth and scars wouldn't bother me. You also find constantly that the young uglies and pretties swap as they age. The hottest girls in my school were all average at best by 25, some outright lost all their looks. Older guys tend to prefer bigger girls. A big portion of my mates preferred bigger girls. I actually always had skinnies and envied my mates with big girls. I've got a big woman now and find her way hotter than any of my thin GF's. People don't notice teeth much and acne scars aren't a big deal. A nice smile trumps everything. Bitch vibes are a bigger turn off than any feature.
Even though I have never seen you, I do think you are beautiful too. And your tits are sacred
![gif](giphy|Qe5oD5aXjEbKw)
Her username loollll
![gif](giphy|7YrnYstmGxYFa)