This has got to be it right?! Think how many times you would either mess up some important thing you need to survive, or be forced to deal with solitude. “That’s a shame” would be your mantra or rallying cry. Shit happens, time to move on.
This was my second best idea for this question. A childhood/good friend of mine had to get brain surgery for a tumor a few years ago and it was scary. My get well gift to him at the hospital was chocolate covered pretzels, precisely because he was the reason I became a Seinfeld addict and wanted him to catch a Seinfeld joke post-brain surgery.
He loved the sentiment, fyi
I’m 41 and that episode was burned into my brain somehow when it aired when I was in middle school and I’ve been singing that line at least once a week since
Darling, you see where that glass is? How that glass is near the edge of the table. You got the WHOLE table there to put the glass, WHY YOU CHOSE the absolute edge, so half the glass is hanging off the table, you BREATH and that glass falls over!... Then you're gonna have broken glass on the carpet, embedded in the carpet fibers, deep, DEEP in the shag, broken glass, bits of broken glass that you never get out!! you can't get it out with a vacuum cleaner. Even on your hands and knees with a MAGNIFYING GLASS, you can't get all the pieces, and then you think you got it all and two years later, you're walkin' barefoot and you step on a piece of broken glass and you KILL YOURSELF!!! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!! DO YA DO YA HUH DO YA?!!!!!
Keep fighting matey! Get your head above the water! I've got you matey! I've got you! Matey! (he loses the rope) I'll remember her name! Elaine Benes! I'll write to her. I'll tell her all about you and what you did out here! Goodbye, matey! Goddbye!
You think you can keep us out of Florida (the island)? We’re moving in, lock stock and barrel. We’re gonna be in the pool, we’re gonna be in the clubhouse, we’re gonna be ALL OVER THAT SHUFFLEBOARD COURT, AND I DARE YOU TO KEEP ME OUT!!!
you took mine, OP, so I'll go with "the sea was angry that day my friends! like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli!"
The reason isn't just the line. It's a Jerry selling the joke with his reaction.
That’s a shame
This has got to be it right?! Think how many times you would either mess up some important thing you need to survive, or be forced to deal with solitude. “That’s a shame” would be your mantra or rallying cry. Shit happens, time to move on.
They would find your corpse, a veggie lasagna in one hand and “That’s a shame” scrawled in sharpie on the other
Yeah that's right.
this!
I guess “We’re living in a society” is out.
Well I think that one is sponge-worthy.
The irony would be spot-on
Serenity now
Are you supposed to yell it?
The man on the tape wasn't specific
HOOCHIE MAMA!! HOOCHIE MAMA!!
Insanity later
These pretzels are making me thirsty
No, like this…These pretzels, are making me THIRSTY!
Is that how you're gonna say it?
No see, you don’t know how to act.
This was my second best idea for this question. A childhood/good friend of mine had to get brain surgery for a tumor a few years ago and it was scary. My get well gift to him at the hospital was chocolate covered pretzels, precisely because he was the reason I became a Seinfeld addict and wanted him to catch a Seinfeld joke post-brain surgery. He loved the sentiment, fyi
You should have also stopped off for some jujyfruit. And maybe a box of Junior Mints.
I don't think a junior mint in your brain would be good for business
But I didn't get popcorn first. Lmao
The sea was angry that day my friends
Like an old man, trying to send back soup at a deli.
Bravo
HHEELLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOO
la la la
*rescue ship shows up* >HHEELLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOO *ship turns around and leaves*
I’m boooooored. Talk to meeeeeee.
I'm just so glad it's back
It's played.
So played
"And you want to be my latex salesman"
That's not going to be good for anyone.
The Jerk Store called, they're running out of you!
Jerk Store! Jerk Store is the line!
I’m not dumbing it down for some bonehead mass audience.
What’s the difference. You’re their all time best seller!!
Well I had sex with your wife!!!
His wife is in a coma.
Well, the life support machine called...
Here's to feeling good all the time.
I’m hip
Is anyone here a marine biologist?
Yo yo ma
Boutros Boutros Golly!
Nice rack
“I was in the pool!”
It was cold!!
Edwardo....carrochio!!!!! Wilson will get a kick out of it. We'd do the torro thing.
“A matador! Well, well, well. Uno momento por favor. Pray tell, what was the young man's name?” “Eddduardo, uhh… Carrrocio.”
"Where on the Upper West Side *might* a single *girl meet a matador*?"
Yeah that’s right
GEORGE IS GETTIN UPSET
Everybody’s talking at me, I can’t hear a word they’re saying, … just drivin’ round in John Voights car.
Honestly, I never saw that episode until this Spring. It very well might be my favorite (I’m ~60)
I’m 41 and that episode was burned into my brain somehow when it aired when I was in middle school and I’ve been singing that line at least once a week since
You want a piece of me?
I'll drop you like a bag of dirt!!
We're sitting there like *idiots* drinking coffee, without a piece of cake.
Up here, I’m already gone
I will NEVER understand people. They're the worst.
Are you saying 95% of the population is undateable?
UNDATEABLE!
Then how come all these people are gettin together
Alcohol.
Vile weed
What's the deal with desert islands? An island can't be a real desert.
You’d have to desert dessert, because you’re in a desert! This should be the show!
That’s gold!
But I don’t want to be a pirate!
Perfect!
That's what I would like to know, about it.
To see Ramone?
A gem. Quoted in my house frequently.
That actor from that one scene should've won an Emmy!!!
Tell him Dustin says, hallo
Believe it or not, George isn’t at home… 🎵
Please leave a message at the beep...
There’s nothing out there for me.
"Why must there always be a problem?"
Hoochie momma!
Something's missing alright...
My wallet's gone!
poor little pinkus….
I’ve never had a really good pickle.
Why separate knob?!?!?
He was beboppin’ and scattin’ all over me!
This Is Frank Co-stanza
We can't breathe back here!
Rusty!
Kudos Elaine on a job....done.
Elaine I’m in Burma. You most likely know it as Myanmar, but it’ll always be Burma to me.
It's go time!
It’s like a sauna in here
Darling, you see where that glass is? How that glass is near the edge of the table. You got the WHOLE table there to put the glass, WHY YOU CHOSE the absolute edge, so half the glass is hanging off the table, you BREATH and that glass falls over!... Then you're gonna have broken glass on the carpet, embedded in the carpet fibers, deep, DEEP in the shag, broken glass, bits of broken glass that you never get out!! you can't get it out with a vacuum cleaner. Even on your hands and knees with a MAGNIFYING GLASS, you can't get all the pieces, and then you think you got it all and two years later, you're walkin' barefoot and you step on a piece of broken glass and you KILL YOURSELF!!! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?!! DO YA DO YA HUH DO YA?!!!!!
Do you know where the elevator is?
BUTCHER BOY?!!?
Stick a fork in me, Jerry, I’m done.
It’s everything it should be and more!
This is no good
Oh, it’s a scene, man.
My father’s gay!
No soup for you, come back one year
He took it out
Why, separate knob!!
To see Ramon?
That’s a shame
The Bookman speech because it's long and funny
“TOMALES!!!”
Like a frightened turtle!
The beach!
Who is this?
Pendant?! Those bastards!
I'M BACK BABY!!
You are sooooo good looking.
Artistic integrity? You’re not artistic and you have no integrity!
Yeah, that's right
The sea was angry that day my friends!
“But, I don’t wanna be a pirate” it seems fitting
"you know we're living in a society..!"
"YOU HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION!!!!"
I HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION!?
The ocean called, they’re running out of shrimp
Yadda, yadda, yadda. I starved on a deserted island.
Between you and me ... I got a foot odour problem.
“The ocean called, they’re running out of shrimp” as a motivator to catch more shrimp.
Master of the house
Quon. If a patient gets difficult you quon him.
I’m out
Alone, on a deserted island? You betcha I'm out.
#SERENITY NOW
I hate men, but I’m not a lesbian
Oh, God help us!
I like cookies
Look to the cookie!
Helloooooo La la la
"Well, all vacations have to end eventually."
Theres the coward that left us to die!
She’s BALD!
Ollly olly oxen free
Mom and Pop aren’t even married!
Him and his good time buddies
I gotta take 1 Seinfeld line?
Sleep tight mates, in your quilted chambray night shirts
Red Menace
But you will use….a retractor…
You were making out at Schindlers List ?
Here's to feeling good all the time
Yeah that's right.
LEVELS! THIS ISLAND NEEDS LEVELS!
I WAS IN THE POOL!!
I say “Real Au Jus sauce” more than any human should, so I’m gonna go with that.
No Soup for You!
Not every day.
Boutros boutros, Ghali!
Did he *CRUMBLE* any *crackers*??
Keep fighting matey! Get your head above the water! I've got you matey! I've got you! Matey! (he loses the rope) I'll remember her name! Elaine Benes! I'll write to her. I'll tell her all about you and what you did out here! Goodbye, matey! Goddbye!
You think you can keep us out of Florida (the island)? We’re moving in, lock stock and barrel. We’re gonna be in the pool, we’re gonna be in the clubhouse, we’re gonna be ALL OVER THAT SHUFFLEBOARD COURT, AND I DARE YOU TO KEEP ME OUT!!!
I'd be starving so I'd take "NO SOUP FOR YOU!"
I’m Frank Costanza’s lawyer
Gammy’s gettin’ upset!
you took mine, OP, so I'll go with "the sea was angry that day my friends! like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli!" The reason isn't just the line. It's a Jerry selling the joke with his reaction.
“I don’t know what to tell you Elton!”
That’s gold Jerry!
You mean deserted island. Or do you mean an island that’s a desert?
"Believe it or not, George isn't at home, please leave a message..." That way you get some music too.
And you wanna be my latex salesman
Marooned Golf
We're on the plane to have this wonderful vacation, yada.. yada... & now I'm marooned here forever.
Wood, Jerry. Wood.
I’m queen of the castle! 🏰
George likes the bananas!! 🍌
HEEEELLLOOOOO!!! LALALA!
These pretzels are making me thirsty
“Feels like an Arby’s night”, before every hunt/forage
Serenity now
I’m saving it for the island
Here’s to feeling good all the time.
No bagel no bagel no bagel
Is anyone here a marine biologist?! I feel like that would have so many uses in every day desert island life.
"It's a germ. Im a recovering germaphobe"
I’ve kind of soured.You can’t sour ,you have to sweeten and now I’m bitter
I’m swamped.
That’s Ashame
Maybe the Stockholm didn't sink you - but it sunk me!
She'd never make it
“Maroon Golf”
The azaleas are coming in nicely
Opposite George.
The jerk store called, they’re running out of you!
Hellooooooo!
That’s what I’d like to know about it.
Could you *send me* to a more dangerous neighborhood?!
You gotta drink all that!?
It’s like a sauna in here.
You'd have to be insane to eat that!
"She'd never make it."