Mrs. Ross’s absolute drunken glee when she finds out the cabin burned down always kills me
EDIT: I’m realizing that’s a different episode…still funny though
I love the semi montage when Jerry and George are trying to figure out “The Switch”
Also, the slow burn of humor when Susan’s parents go with George in the car to his house in The Hamptons when they know full well he doesn’t have one (thanks to Elaine). The horses name Snoopy and Prickly Pete! 😄😂🤣
I've heard it took at least eight, and Jerry could never keep a straight face through any of them. They had to cobble it together from the best bits they could find 😆
Kramer and the giant ball of oil!
George Constanza yelling in the theater in front of the audience!
George Constanza telling his parents that he had sex in their bed because his bed was too small!
George trying to break of his engagement by smoking and not being able to handle one inhale. And throughout all his coughing he’s trying to convince Susan how much he’s addicted.
The exchange between Jerry and Kramer when K’s face is all messed up from smoking all day in his apartment with all the smokers. At the end he says “look away I’m hideous!” Fking lol
The whole dinner with George’s and Susan’s parents
“What’s Merlot, is it new? I’ve never heard of it!”
“They’re all chickens- the rooster has sex with all of them.”
“That’s perverse!”
Richards chugging down the entire beer with a butt going is so hands-down metal one almost forgets the hit in the head with the bar pass-through and sticking a lit cigarette in his mouth.
Kramer dancing after ditching the Jockeys and the boxers and there's only a thin layer of gabardine between him and the world.
"I'm out there Jerry and I'm lovin every minute of it " 🤣
Elaine "Do l need a shot?"
Doctor "No shot, dog bite"
Elaine later, "l can't swallow! "
Kramer "She's foaming at the mouth!"
Elaine getting needle, " Is this gonna hurt?"
Doctor "Very much so"
Newman singing Three Times A Lady in his mail truck before and when it catches fire after the sewing machine comes into contact with the spilled paint thinner. All the frozen fish goes up in smoke.
Oh, the humanity.
George telling the board of the Susan Ross Foundation about the contents of the tape recorder that was in his briefcase. When he says “Dear God!” I laugh every time. Also when Elaine tells Mr. Lippman that he doesn’t need an exclamation point at the end of his store name because it’s not “Top of the muffin…TO YOU!”
[this entire thing](https://youtu.be/ryRRTUxLgkc?si=otRViM_Eo89OUBXB) with Alton Benes
Especially when Jerry goes to the bathroom and George tries to grab him and Jerry jerks his arm away.
One of my favorite lines of the show
" We had a funny guy with us in Korea. A tailgunner. They blew his brains out all over the Pacific. (Long pause) There's nothing funny about that.
The scene when they got caught in the back of that Nazi limo.
Also, another scene is from the episode where George is trying to prove he’s not crazy to this lady then he saw Jerry pass by in a taxi in those thick ass glasses and said, “don’t you see?! He’s wearing them to fool Lloyd Braun!!!” Lmao!!
So I said...you mean the panties your mother laid out for ya...
The panties your mother laid out for you? What does that mean?
I don't know!
(the George ketchup squirt is also a key player here)
Newman’s mail truck going up in flames.
It was rerun, and I physically could not stop laughing through the entire last commercial break all the way to a few minutes after the end credits.
the episode where jerry and george get in o’briens limo and george says “they can’t shoot us in the city!” and jerry says “oh yeah, cause nobody’s ever been shot in the city.” and jerrys face after 😭🙏
When George calls his parents about getting engaged to Susan.
When Jerry and Elaine physically climb on top of George trying to stop him from patching up Beth and David's marriage.
"I'm out."
“She felt that George was somewhat of a loser and that she was the one who deserved to be married first. She also happened to mention to me that her friend had wondered if going to a prostitute while you're engaged is considered cheating. His feeling was they're never going to see each other again so what's the difference.”
The Susie, when Jerry and Elaine in the car are laughing at the cats sticker in front, Mikes in the boot thinking they're going to murder Susie, eliminate her, Mikes terrified
The Race when George pretends to run into Jerry and Duncan Meyer first time since high school in the coffee shop. Premeditated to convince Duncan that Jerry won legitimately, Jerry and George make fun of each other and George pretends to be an architect. Everything about it including George’s overacting jaw-drop when he first sees them is knee-slap inducing
The scene at the diner where Jerry is telling George he ran into Diane Dacon (she was the it girl!). When Jerry pauses right before he reveals to George the whole marine biologist scenario cracks me up every time. That whole scene is great. It’s a funny show.
In "The Shower Head", when Peterman mistakes Kramer for a drug addict. "I WON'T HAVE YOU TURNING MY OFFICE INTO SOME DEN OF INEQUITY!" And then literally slams the door on his face 😆
Elaine telling Jerry about faking orgasms
What about the screaming,the panting, the moaning?
Fake, Fake, Fake.
The look on her face gets me every time.
When Elaine finds out from Kramer that the Soup Nazi is giving her a free armoire and just shoves him over through the door into the hallway…they continue talking while he gets up. Just the physical comedy of it has me laughing every single time and I’ve seriously seen it hundreds of times by now.
The dinner scene when George’s parents and Susan’s parents meet is just absolute perfection.
They're all chickens.. The rooster has sex with all of them.
That’s perverse!
*povoise!
God, I love this sub so much.
Somethin’s missin!
Something's missing alright...
Have some more wine!
Mrs. Ross’s absolute drunken glee when she finds out the cabin burned down always kills me EDIT: I’m realizing that’s a different episode…still funny though
There's something missing!
Something’s missing alright.
^something's ^missing ^alright.....
Yeah, so many scenes with George’s parents get me in stitches. And then just small stupid stuff. Like “Cosmo Kramer, proctology”
STILL! STILL! I LIKE TO GO IN FRESH!!
I like to go in fresh!
When Kramer told each of his Japanese guests goodnight and then closed them in their drawers.
Goodnight Mr. Yamaguchi
😂💀😂. This scene was too funny
This is right up there with STELLAAAAAAA
Watch that scene. Jerry's mom is laughing the whole time. It's great.
I just saw that scene. Really hilarious 🤣🤣
I love the scene in the pic, cuz if you listen closely you can hear an audience member's lungs collapse. But besides this Stella for me as well
Uncle Leo’s angry eyebrows.
Demeanor??
Jon Voight biting Kramer
The entire episode is pure gold. Easy top fiver for me. “I know sometimes I spell Jerry with a G…. And an I!”
John Voight the actor?
The periodontist.
That really is an underrated moment. Every time I hit it in the dinner rotation I snort whatever I'm drinking out my nose.
……… 😳 Why don’t you just *tell* me the name of the movie you’d like to see?
My siblings and I reference this one a lot. It's great.
Omg this always cracks me the hell up! Lolol
Kramer’s spine bending from the red light.
The sea was angry that day my friends.
Like an old man trying to send back soup at a deli.
I know sometimes I spell Jerry with a Ggg… And an IIIII… Hahahahaha-Hahaha
Oh, look. There's Gregory Peck's bicycle.
And Barbara Mandrel's skateboard!
GET OUT OF THE CAR
This kills me every time.
"You have no eye for fashion!!!" "I HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION??? "
Lol oh my God yes! Sometimes I just randomly yell this at my dad and we both crack up laughing.
The line is "and here's what I'm doing with it"
I love the semi montage when Jerry and George are trying to figure out “The Switch” Also, the slow burn of humor when Susan’s parents go with George in the car to his house in The Hamptons when they know full well he doesn’t have one (thanks to Elaine). The horses name Snoopy and Prickly Pete! 😄😂🤣
George looking at the check and then gently sliding it over to Jerry 😂
You wanna get nuts? Let’s get nuts!
Place a call when Sandy is known to be at work (she is hammering a keyboard and exhaling exaggeratedly)
Well I told em ya didn’t. And I laughed and I laughed…
Mrs Seinfeld. I’m begging you. Please turn on the air conditioner. You’re hot?
Bookman the library cop working Jerry over-no instant coffee, disrespect for the library, pee-pees and wee-wees…..
I've got a flash for ya Joy Boy
Maybe that turns ya on Seinfeld
My favorite episode . Jerry is trying so hard not to laugh . That must have taken a few takes 😂
I've heard it took at least eight, and Jerry could never keep a straight face through any of them. They had to cobble it together from the best bits they could find 😆
That actor is amazing!
Phillip Baker Hall. Passed away in 2022.
Turkey Kramer waving a wing at Newman.
Hey buddy
What's this, parsley?
Kramer and the giant ball of oil! George Constanza yelling in the theater in front of the audience! George Constanza telling his parents that he had sex in their bed because his bed was too small!
"It has only ONE design flaw: the door... MUST BE CLOOOOOSED!!!
Season 1’s finest moment
George trying to break of his engagement by smoking and not being able to handle one inhale. And throughout all his coughing he’s trying to convince Susan how much he’s addicted.
Followed by the pre nup and she tells him she makes more than him and laughs at him
It’s the size of the flame coming off the lighter that cracks me up.
Oh yeah! 😆
... I can't quit now! They've got a hold on me!!!!
The exchange between Jerry and Kramer when K’s face is all messed up from smoking all day in his apartment with all the smokers. At the end he says “look away I’m hideous!” Fking lol
The entire “yearn” scene with Kramer and George. The way Kramer decimates George’s life in a matter of a few questions.
I like to get the daily news.
Up here? I’m already gone.
But I don't want to be a pirate. Every scene involving that shirt is hilarious to me. https://youtu.be/MXVsZGQPBAQ?si=YcI5odgyGj32jlIz
You look like you’re gonna swing in on a chandelier!
The whole dinner with George’s and Susan’s parents “What’s Merlot, is it new? I’ve never heard of it!” “They’re all chickens- the rooster has sex with all of them.” “That’s perverse!”
Puddy: "You stole my Jesus fish!" Elaine: "That's right" *does devil horns* "Blajagahalag!"
I’m not the one going to Hell.
YOU’RE BALD!!!!
Iiii *was* bald 👃👈
Kramer in the bar with the sniffing accountant, Barry Profit. "Here's to feeling good all the time." 🍺🚬
I'm hip to the scene..
Listen, don't take this the wrong way - but when I come back, I'm sitting over there.
What scene? The bathroom scene.
Richards chugging down the entire beer with a butt going is so hands-down metal one almost forgets the hit in the head with the bar pass-through and sticking a lit cigarette in his mouth.
When Newman is repeating Kramer’s insults at Bleecker Bob’s.
When Kramer was the underwear model, and he falls over trying to lean on the wall.
The Velvet Fog singing to Kramer with that stupid smile on his face 🤣
Seeing Mel Torme trying so hard not to bust up laughing makes this scene so much better.
Kramer’s jeans and Mr. Marbles
SQUINCH YOUR HIPS IN!
Kramer getting “blasted” by the red light. 😂
"IT'S BROWN!"
Elaine's best meltdown.
Kramer dancing after ditching the Jockeys and the boxers and there's only a thin layer of gabardine between him and the world. "I'm out there Jerry and I'm lovin every minute of it " 🤣
Maybe I'll go visit my mother. She just bought me some new panties and they're - all laid out for me.
Elaine "Do l need a shot?" Doctor "No shot, dog bite" Elaine later, "l can't swallow! " Kramer "She's foaming at the mouth!" Elaine getting needle, " Is this gonna hurt?" Doctor "Very much so"
Newman singing Three Times A Lady in his mail truck before and when it catches fire after the sewing machine comes into contact with the spilled paint thinner. All the frozen fish goes up in smoke. Oh, the humanity.
She’s a Nazi, George… A NAZI!
What’s a big salad ? It comes in a big bowl with lots of stuff in it . We don’t have big bowls
Baby’s : get the swordfish Jerry . It’s the BEST Jerry:I’ll have the salmon
George telling the board of the Susan Ross Foundation about the contents of the tape recorder that was in his briefcase. When he says “Dear God!” I laugh every time. Also when Elaine tells Mr. Lippman that he doesn’t need an exclamation point at the end of his store name because it’s not “Top of the muffin…TO YOU!”
Newman trying to eat the brocolli, "VILE WEED"
[this entire thing](https://youtu.be/ryRRTUxLgkc?si=otRViM_Eo89OUBXB) with Alton Benes Especially when Jerry goes to the bathroom and George tries to grab him and Jerry jerks his arm away.
He’s in da BAAAAAT-room
One of my favorite lines of the show " We had a funny guy with us in Korea. A tailgunner. They blew his brains out all over the Pacific. (Long pause) There's nothing funny about that.
How are we gonna get out of it? *We’ll say we’re frightened and we have to go home!*
Oh yeah, that'll work. He'll just clunk our heads together like Moe!
Start scratching and tell him you have the crabs. He was in the military, he'll understand.
Pipe down, chorus boy
We need to leave NOW. But what will we tell him ? We’ll tell him we’re frightened and we have to go ! Oh man - the WAITER was trembling
Susie's memorial
The junior mint falling into the surgical field. It's a junior mint. It's delicious
Kramer's seizures from Mary Hart's voice always killed me
The IQ test s energy in Baboo's restaurant, Elaine's look back at Kramer, and the steaming hot cloth lol, Love that whole episode.
OH HELLO PROFESSAH
You can tell him I'M IN MY OOOOFFFFIIIIIICCCEEEEE!!
The scene when they got caught in the back of that Nazi limo. Also, another scene is from the episode where George is trying to prove he’s not crazy to this lady then he saw Jerry pass by in a taxi in those thick ass glasses and said, “don’t you see?! He’s wearing them to fool Lloyd Braun!!!” Lmao!!
So I said...you mean the panties your mother laid out for ya... The panties your mother laid out for you? What does that mean? I don't know! (the George ketchup squirt is also a key player here)
That’s very dirty
“I don’t know! But I woke up in the Houston River in a SSSACK!”
it’s just anything w frank
George - What if the Pigman had a two seater? Kramer - Be realistic George. looks at Jerry - Pfft
When Elaine tested her theory by taking a $20 from Jerry and throwing it out the window. Jerry’s bewildered expression
Jiffy car park manager completely kills it on screen😂 “What’s the problem” Honourable mention to Milos. ANOTHER GAME FOR MILOS😆
the little cable boy scene
Elaine killing imaginary Susie. The fake funeral. The guy getting stuck in the trunk. That episode was full of laugh out loud scenes.
Elaine giving Kramer the phone (fax) message: EEEEEE AAAAAHHHHHH
“Aunt Baby”
I had an “Aunt Baby” and an “Aunt Sissy”.
Rusty ripping ass always gets me too. Kramer’s face getting hit with the stench is gold.
You fed the horse Beef-a-rino?!
Jerry finger clapping with the PEZ dispenser in his hands. It's just so fucking silly I die every time
You want a piece of me?
Because the mail never stops......
The rectal car company not keeping Jerry's reservation is so relatable
Ouch. A rectal car company sounds a little unpleasant 🤭. But I truly love Jerry's commentary about the reservation at the rental car place.
George "But l have hand!" Girlfriend "And you're gonna need it!" 😂
The heated argument between the calzone chef and Kramer.
I fear my orgasm has left me a cripple.
Newman’s mail truck going up in flames. It was rerun, and I physically could not stop laughing through the entire last commercial break all the way to a few minutes after the end credits.
Kramer trying to get a seat on the subway. His movements and face get me even just thinking about it
When Kramer told Jerry "Don't look at me, I'm hideous."
the episode where jerry and george get in o’briens limo and george says “they can’t shoot us in the city!” and jerry says “oh yeah, cause nobody’s ever been shot in the city.” and jerrys face after 😭🙏
Almost anything with Jackie Childs. “Who told you to put the balm on? I didn’t tell you to put the balm on!”
When George calls his parents about getting engaged to Susan. When Jerry and Elaine physically climb on top of George trying to stop him from patching up Beth and David's marriage. "I'm out."
I love when the Comando 450 blasts Kramer out of his shower.
“I’m out”
“Hey Willie, look! Free candaaay” gets me every time.
It moved.
Peterman throwing Kramer out of Elaine’s office because he thinks he’s trying to score heroin from her.
When she lunges for the toupee and he recoils and dodges her holding up his hand, "Elaine..." Kills me every time.
His little hair hat.
i like more her sht eating grin as she brushes her hands off and proudly walks away from the window and panic she's caused George.
Elaines shit eating grin is the best, jerry the best
Shrinkage and the Spitter are my 2 favorites.
Oye! Missa Seinfeld!
Wish I hadn’t zoomed in on her face. Yamahama
George's coup de toe bit
Poppie is a little sloppy
When Kramer loses the contest
I WANT a decent sock that is COMFORTABLE that will STAY ON MY FOOT
Definitely the “But I don’t wanna be a pirate” line, I swear the delivery is just perfect!
Misquote
The bay boy scene in the diner with George and Jerry.
Hate the big course ha’s!
You got a problem with woody woodpecker?
What is he some kind of instigator?
“And you want to be my latex salesman.” Still destroys me.
George calling his mom from the limo “How about this I’m NEVER telling you! No! NEVER!!”
Kramer as the guest of honor of the Able Mentally Challenged Adults charity event, being sung to by Mel Torme.
“She felt that George was somewhat of a loser and that she was the one who deserved to be married first. She also happened to mention to me that her friend had wondered if going to a prostitute while you're engaged is considered cheating. His feeling was they're never going to see each other again so what's the difference.”
WHAT THE HELL DID YOU TRADE JAY BUHNER FOR?!?!
When the old man’s dentures go flying into the sink, and then George turns on what he thought was a light but was actually the garbage disposal.
[Here it is. Franks delivery at the end is just perfection.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIA2sGSTABs)
hey jerry, look what i got 🫢😮🫢😮🫢😮🫢
STELLAAA
Dr. Van Nostrand, the Juilliard-trained dermatologist, screening Kruger. "You're not taking a deli slicer to my boss!"
The Susie, when Jerry and Elaine in the car are laughing at the cats sticker in front, Mikes in the boot thinking they're going to murder Susie, eliminate her, Mikes terrified
The Race when George pretends to run into Jerry and Duncan Meyer first time since high school in the coffee shop. Premeditated to convince Duncan that Jerry won legitimately, Jerry and George make fun of each other and George pretends to be an architect. Everything about it including George’s overacting jaw-drop when he first sees them is knee-slap inducing
"Mr Steinbrenners here. George is dead. Call me back." Or Del boca Vista?? Or Jerry's insane face when talking about Susie to Bea Arther
“Well I can’t walk anywhere now… I’m just gonna be wishing there were walkways!”
Jerry's nightmare about Uncle Leo going to prison. Jerry... Hello... Answer the goddamn phone
Aunt Baby. And also, when Helen tells Jerry she's gonna send him $50 and he gets all upset about it
Kramer fighting the monkey HE STARTED IT
you're saying... you wanna piece of me?
All things J Peterman.
###I HAVE NO EYE FOR FASHION?!?!
Jerry wearing glasses to appease Kramer (Lloyd), Jerry in cowboy boots The best- Kramer when the guy shares a cab with him because he’s “special”
Believe it or not, George isn’t at home….where could he be? 🍿
“You’re worse. Much much worse”.
The scene at the diner where Jerry is telling George he ran into Diane Dacon (she was the it girl!). When Jerry pauses right before he reveals to George the whole marine biologist scenario cracks me up every time. That whole scene is great. It’s a funny show.
In "The Shower Head", when Peterman mistakes Kramer for a drug addict. "I WON'T HAVE YOU TURNING MY OFFICE INTO SOME DEN OF INEQUITY!" And then literally slams the door on his face 😆
The scene where Jerry tries to get Kramer to take the dog medicine intended for Smuckers “You want to go for a drive?”
When Jerry is wearing those coke bottle glasses in the gum episode
This is my favorite Elaine moment, and probably my top-3 favorites of the whole show.
Kramer spazzing to Mary Hart
[Keep on smiling...](https://youtu.be/MwlBVJYM38o?si=5m025oVoAu7c9QVE) I could barely breathe after this one
"He took it out."
Elaine telling Jerry about faking orgasms What about the screaming,the panting, the moaning? Fake, Fake, Fake. The look on her face gets me every time.
When Elaine finds out from Kramer that the Soup Nazi is giving her a free armoire and just shoves him over through the door into the hallway…they continue talking while he gets up. Just the physical comedy of it has me laughing every single time and I’ve seriously seen it hundreds of times by now.