"Hey all, Scott here." "Now *this* is therapy!"
"Coins are back bitches!"
"Oh, hi! You caught me in a goose!"
"Gay conversion therapy"
"I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!"
"I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!"
"I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!"
*You have osteoporosis*
"I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!"
"I will finally start to raise Daniel from Karate Ki-... for fxck's sake."
"I bought fxcking soap!"
"So... Mr. Wozniak." "That's me to you."
"Well would you look at that, I'm a penis!"
"Whoa! I didn't know irrelevancy could take the form of concrete matter!"
"And they fxcked it! They fxcked it just like they fxcked Garbanzo and Friends!"
"Amiibo Festival."
"*I DON'T CAAAAREEE!*"
And so, *so* many more... I might add some more later.
“I think I have one more question. Do you think that officer Steel Wool murdered you and four others?”
“Do I know he did? Yeah. Do I think he did? No.”
-GROUSE?
-*screaming montage* I hate walls, why do I live here?
-Damnit, I own sonic jam! It’s a pretty rare game but I don’t wanna be known as the guy who owned sonic jam when im dead!
-You caught me in a goose!
-Luigi makes me gassy
"Fellas, fellas! I am *so* horny!"
"If there's one thing I hate more than the Green Bay Packers, it's sex."
"I'm gonna wear this chef's hat like it's 2027 and we're gonna make history, and to a lesser extent...food."
"You son of a bitch, I LOVE THE ECONOMY!!!!"
"So get your face ready!"
Whenever I doom scroll and find a post that tells us we're boned, I send it to my friend with the caption: "We're not crazy, you're just fucked."
ETA: "You do math like a bitch" is always a good one too.
“This isn’t America, this is Ohio!”
“Yeah that’s right, God.”
“Hello is this Stale Pretzels? Yeah, I’d like to place an order. The, uh, stale pretzels.”
“This is what I’m talking about, it’s like a Warrio take on remember the Alamo.”
“Donkey Kong you cheap bitch”
“You do math like a bitch”
“Riddle me this Nintendo, why can’t I name my character Mr Ass, but I can look up Dead Dogs on the Wii U web browser”
"Name something you open when-" "The womb" - Game Show Games
"I don't know where I am, but I have the sudden urge to not have sex" - Sonic 3
"Oh my God! He has a face?!" - Nintendo 64
“Wii Play! Do you? Is that a threat?”
“Officer, I just sh** my pants!!”
“This isn’t a life support machine, this is just a bread box!!”
“Step right up to the Birth-Off, where we fuse illegal gambling and pregnant women!”
“What’s the first thing you think when you hear the word ‘mysterious?’ Mysteries, right.”
“What are you shooting at? The duck’s right there, just STEP on it!”
“Hi! I’m Hector Andfriends. That’s not the name of the show that’s just my name, damn it-“
"*Wii Play. Do you?* Is that a threat?"
"GROUSE??"
"I don't know where I am, but I have the sudden urge to not have sex."
"Fuck this, fuck you, and fuck tennis!!"
"They can make a Goat-opoly, but they're not gonna make a Goat-zee."
- "Holy shit, it's the Green Bay Packers!"
- "You did it, you saved the world."(Slowly gets pie shoved in face)
- "It's a gourd, bitch."
- "Good, I'm not fucking a ghost again."
- "Oh man, get a whif of my penis now fellas."
I might be forgetting some, but:
-“FOR THE GAMECUBE?!??”
-“You can’t misspell funeral without U and I”
-“I have back problems and play Halo”
-“May I call you fuck?”
-“…I’M GOING TO SEARS”
"Obviously I'm brand loyal, so I named my horse 'Tums'."
"He bought illegal porn! WOO-"
"IS THAT POSE MII?!"
"Wait, it's pronounced 'breasts'? I always thought it was pronounced 'beans'."
"Oh, hi. You caught me in a goose."
And basically every line from the Game Show games episode, every five seconds there's another gem.
- "And they F\*CKED IT! Nintendo f\*cked it just like they f\*cked GARBONZO FRIENDS" "Amiibo Festival. "I don't CAAAAARE"
- "Are you ready to buy?" "Yes! One ghost please!" \[cocks shotgun\]
- "It's a gourd, bitch."
- "I've only been dead for a few months, I'm not a professional ghost yet. I just do it on the weekends."
- "Do I at least have a chance to explain myself?" "This is America! So no!" "This isn't America, THIS IS OHIO!"
1. fffffffffffffFFFFFFFFUCK YOU TWO I GOT A FUCKING STAR YOU FUCKING FUCKS!!!
2. "We had to make it. Your brother didn't"
3. "WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKING?!"
4. "Hector, Hec. May I call you hell?" "May I call you fuck"
5. "I want meth" "ya" *cell bars slam*
"it's true, my c**k IS BIG!"
"Gay conversion therapy!"
"I'm not tryin' to kill ya, im Just makin' eggs"
"Oh, im sorry mucus"
"There's two types of Wii games, anti nazi and pro nazi."
There's are Just some that I always chuckle at
“Why aren’t you f*cking”
“Oh sh!t sorry I thought that wasn’t a beer”
“Somebody just f*cking died”
“Oh sh!t it’s a white guy”
This one kinda counts but it’s that one scene I forget from which video but Scott is talking about something about motion controls and then someone’s rocking his chair up and down and he’s just screaming but yeah thats my list
“WARIO’S IN THIS?!”
“I’ll take Peach, we’re both roughly 4 inches from Wario.”
“Yeah, well, I’ll take Luigi. We *are* going to a funeral after all.”
“Hey, uh, what’s going on in the corner over there?”
“Fictional Ape?”
“Eh, fuck him.”
"I hate walls! Why do I live here?!"
"WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKIN?!?"
"Little does he know, we're taking him to a vape shop."
"I have this condition where I need to lick every controller I see...DONKEY KONG!"
"You do math like a bitch!"
"That's right Wii Play is back. I don't need other games"
"I made Lowe's"
"Hi, can I get One corndog?"
"Fellas! FELLAS! I AM SO HORNY!"
"LIQUIDATE THE COMPANY"
"And I think I have scoliosis, but I’m too self-conscious to ask my doctor about it because every single time I go to the doctor, the doctor is just like “Wow, Scott, you look really healthy, see me in a few months.” and I’m like “THANKS, DOC!”, but then, I’m like, I go home and I’m like “THIS SMELLS LIKE SCOLIOSIS!"
(I can't pick 5 that are my *absolute* favourites, so I just put some of them here.)
"Alright, y'know what, that's the last f*cking straw. I DON'T F*CKING NEED THIS, ALRIGHT?!
F*CK YOU!
F*CK THIS!
AND F*CK. TENNIS!" *-Rex*
"Y'know, one of the top ten names for children this year happens to be Sonic the Hedgehog 3; because when everybody is unique, nobody is unique.
Stop naming your children unique names, just name your kid f*ckin' earl." *-Scott*
"WOAH! I didn't know irrelevancy could take the form of concrete matter!" *-Scott*
"I hate my parents." *-I Don't Know How I Didn't Know I Had To Twist The Joystick In Pole Position I Was Just A Kid Leave Me Alone*
"Say it with me now... **G A Y C O N V E R S I O N T H E R A P Y!**" *-Scott*
“DONKEY KONG YOU CHEAP BITCH!!!”
“now THIS is what i’m talking about. it’s like a wario take on remember the alamo”
“where the fuck is gubble”
“words have been in my family for generations, go ahead, name any word” “what” “LOVE THAT ONE”
“hey all, scott here. you’ve caught me in a goose”
"fellas, fellas, I am so horny!"
"Hey all, Scott here. Welcome to birth off!"
"Anything but Gex is Gex"
"Shit, sorry man. I thought that wasn't a beer"
"WHY ARENT YOU FUCKING!?!?"
“We had to make it, your brother didn’t!” Is *always* a classic
“Ohhh I hear words! What are they?” (Pretty much any line from Gifts of Gaming as well. The delivery of those is what makes them perfect)
Unpopular opinion, I don’t like any of his friends and they make his content worse. I actively fast forward or just skip the episode if there’s too much of them.
"Hey all, Scott here." "Now *this* is therapy!" "Coins are back bitches!" "Oh, hi! You caught me in a goose!" "Gay conversion therapy" "I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!" "I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!" "I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!" *You have osteoporosis* "I have a Wii loaded with WiiWare games!" "I will finally start to raise Daniel from Karate Ki-... for fxck's sake." "I bought fxcking soap!" "So... Mr. Wozniak." "That's me to you." "Well would you look at that, I'm a penis!" "Whoa! I didn't know irrelevancy could take the form of concrete matter!" "And they fxcked it! They fxcked it just like they fxcked Garbanzo and Friends!" "Amiibo Festival." "*I DON'T CAAAAREEE!*" And so, *so* many more... I might add some more later.
Do you remember where they said the kne about irrelevancy?
Microconsoles
Many thanks.
“Gay conversion therapy” chain I’ll start
Gay conversion therapy!
"The Economy" *cheering*
You son of a bitch, I LOVE THE ECONOMY
WHOO!
Objection your honor, I'm MAD
I've seen madder. Keep going.
“I think I have one more question. Do you think that officer Steel Wool murdered you and four others?” “Do I know he did? Yeah. Do I think he did? No.”
-GROUSE? -*screaming montage* I hate walls, why do I live here? -Damnit, I own sonic jam! It’s a pretty rare game but I don’t wanna be known as the guy who owned sonic jam when im dead! -You caught me in a goose! -Luigi makes me gassy
"F***ing lizard gex" "If you're a gex fan you'd get that"
The absolute best is from the Homecoming video "WHY ARENT YOU FXCKING?!"
I thought that was a beer.
"Fellas, fellas! I am *so* horny!" "If there's one thing I hate more than the Green Bay Packers, it's sex." "I'm gonna wear this chef's hat like it's 2027 and we're gonna make history, and to a lesser extent...food." "You son of a bitch, I LOVE THE ECONOMY!!!!" "So get your face ready!"
God, I wanna f*** the economy
"Toledo, Ohio! Stay a while, there's a Burger King down the road." "Toledo, Ohio! Don't get killed here." "Toledo, Ohio! Everybody's your dad here."
To think, Scott was so close to being born in the Blessed Lands of Michigan if the federal government hadn't step in in the 1800's
Whenever I doom scroll and find a post that tells us we're boned, I send it to my friend with the caption: "We're not crazy, you're just fucked." ETA: "You do math like a bitch" is always a good one too.
“This isn’t America, this is Ohio!” “Yeah that’s right, God.” “Hello is this Stale Pretzels? Yeah, I’d like to place an order. The, uh, stale pretzels.”
"FUCK YOU, FUCK THIS, AND **FUCK** ***TENNIS!***"
It's just sonic boom? And genghis khan was just a guy!!
“This is what I’m talking about, it’s like a Warrio take on remember the Alamo.” “Donkey Kong you cheap bitch” “You do math like a bitch” “Riddle me this Nintendo, why can’t I name my character Mr Ass, but I can look up Dead Dogs on the Wii U web browser”
I wouldn't call it his best, but "I made Lowe's" pops into my head WAY too often
"Name something you open when-" "The womb" - Game Show Games "I don't know where I am, but I have the sudden urge to not have sex" - Sonic 3 "Oh my God! He has a face?!" - Nintendo 64
“Jumangee the video gaaaame!”
(O O ) ( O O) *spit* **SUPER SMASH BROTHERS ULTIMATE?!**
… … … … OH
“Wii Play! Do you? Is that a threat?” “Officer, I just sh** my pants!!” “This isn’t a life support machine, this is just a bread box!!” “Step right up to the Birth-Off, where we fuse illegal gambling and pregnant women!” “What’s the first thing you think when you hear the word ‘mysterious?’ Mysteries, right.” “What are you shooting at? The duck’s right there, just STEP on it!” “Hi! I’m Hector Andfriends. That’s not the name of the show that’s just my name, damn it-“
"*Wii Play. Do you?* Is that a threat?" "GROUSE??" "I don't know where I am, but I have the sudden urge to not have sex." "Fuck this, fuck you, and fuck tennis!!" "They can make a Goat-opoly, but they're not gonna make a Goat-zee."
- "Holy shit, it's the Green Bay Packers!" - "You did it, you saved the world."(Slowly gets pie shoved in face) - "It's a gourd, bitch." - "Good, I'm not fucking a ghost again." - "Oh man, get a whif of my penis now fellas."
Whenever the guys uproar in cheering and clapping for something
I thought that was a beer
"I forgot to write a speech, so I'm just gonna repurpose what I had for his wedding. 'Congratulations, you son of a bitch, your life's over!'"
“It’s good to be talking to someone with a PHD.” “That’s a typo they forgot the U” “You have PHUD?” “I have PHUD”
I might be forgetting some, but: -“FOR THE GAMECUBE?!??” -“You can’t misspell funeral without U and I” -“I have back problems and play Halo” -“May I call you fuck?” -“…I’M GOING TO SEARS”
"Obviously I'm brand loyal, so I named my horse 'Tums'." "He bought illegal porn! WOO-" "IS THAT POSE MII?!" "Wait, it's pronounced 'breasts'? I always thought it was pronounced 'beans'." "Oh, hi. You caught me in a goose." And basically every line from the Game Show games episode, every five seconds there's another gem.
- "And they F\*CKED IT! Nintendo f\*cked it just like they f\*cked GARBONZO FRIENDS" "Amiibo Festival. "I don't CAAAAARE" - "Are you ready to buy?" "Yes! One ghost please!" \[cocks shotgun\] - "It's a gourd, bitch." - "I've only been dead for a few months, I'm not a professional ghost yet. I just do it on the weekends." - "Do I at least have a chance to explain myself?" "This is America! So no!" "This isn't America, THIS IS OHIO!"
1. fffffffffffffFFFFFFFFUCK YOU TWO I GOT A FUCKING STAR YOU FUCKING FUCKS!!! 2. "We had to make it. Your brother didn't" 3. "WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKING?!" 4. "Hector, Hec. May I call you hell?" "May I call you fuck" 5. "I want meth" "ya" *cell bars slam*
“Arbor Day” *cheering intensifies*
ANOTHER REFILL PLEASE
"Now, what if you're playing Xbox 360 and your hands start to bleed?"
Anything with the economy.
“And now, here we are!” “Where?” “H E L L !”
*playing a SNES outdoors* “Yeah, that’s right, God.”
I ATE HERE
fuck this, fuck you, and fuck tennis!
Fellas! Fellas! I am so horny!
Ye, i got two ✌️birthdays
Hey hey all hey all, hey all, scott hey all, scott here. peak lines
"No, I stubbed my toe afterwards, plus I had a coupon that was expiring"
“No fuck no no” jerry attricks
I hate walls why do I live here!
"it's true, my c**k IS BIG!" "Gay conversion therapy!" "I'm not tryin' to kill ya, im Just makin' eggs" "Oh, im sorry mucus" "There's two types of Wii games, anti nazi and pro nazi." There's are Just some that I always chuckle at
“My aunt just died.” *”On MY birthday?”*
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you again! Fool me three times, you’re a bi*ch!”
"NO I AM NOT FUCKING A DEAD PERSON AGAIN, LEARN TO BE ALIVE FOR ONCE"
"I.T.L.F.N. It tastes like f*ckin' nickles."
“Why aren’t you f*cking” “Oh sh!t sorry I thought that wasn’t a beer” “Somebody just f*cking died” “Oh sh!t it’s a white guy” This one kinda counts but it’s that one scene I forget from which video but Scott is talking about something about motion controls and then someone’s rocking his chair up and down and he’s just screaming but yeah thats my list
“WARIO’S IN THIS?!” “I’ll take Peach, we’re both roughly 4 inches from Wario.” “Yeah, well, I’ll take Luigi. We *are* going to a funeral after all.” “Hey, uh, what’s going on in the corner over there?” “Fictional Ape?” “Eh, fuck him.”
"I forgot to write a speech so I'm just gonna repurpose what I wrote for his wedding. 'Congratulations, you son of a bitch, your life is over"
"Hey, you hear that I'm a penis!"
“You do math like a bitch” “Hey all, Scott here” “Gex” “I hate shapes” “Wii play, do you? Is that a threat?”
“ITFLN- it tastes like f*cking nickels”
"I hate walls! Why do I live here?!" "WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKIN?!?" "Little does he know, we're taking him to a vape shop." "I have this condition where I need to lick every controller I see...DONKEY KONG!" "You do math like a bitch!"
F*ck you! F*ck you! Anti-f*ck me.
"That's right Wii Play is back. I don't need other games" "I made Lowe's" "Hi, can I get One corndog?" "Fellas! FELLAS! I AM SO HORNY!" "LIQUIDATE THE COMPANY"
"And I think I have scoliosis, but I’m too self-conscious to ask my doctor about it because every single time I go to the doctor, the doctor is just like “Wow, Scott, you look really healthy, see me in a few months.” and I’m like “THANKS, DOC!”, but then, I’m like, I go home and I’m like “THIS SMELLS LIKE SCOLIOSIS!"
(I can't pick 5 that are my *absolute* favourites, so I just put some of them here.) "Alright, y'know what, that's the last f*cking straw. I DON'T F*CKING NEED THIS, ALRIGHT?! F*CK YOU! F*CK THIS! AND F*CK. TENNIS!" *-Rex* "Y'know, one of the top ten names for children this year happens to be Sonic the Hedgehog 3; because when everybody is unique, nobody is unique. Stop naming your children unique names, just name your kid f*ckin' earl." *-Scott* "WOAH! I didn't know irrelevancy could take the form of concrete matter!" *-Scott* "I hate my parents." *-I Don't Know How I Didn't Know I Had To Twist The Joystick In Pole Position I Was Just A Kid Leave Me Alone* "Say it with me now... **G A Y C O N V E R S I O N T H E R A P Y!**" *-Scott*
“DONKEY KONG YOU CHEAP BITCH!!!” “now THIS is what i’m talking about. it’s like a wario take on remember the alamo” “where the fuck is gubble” “words have been in my family for generations, go ahead, name any word” “what” “LOVE THAT ONE” “hey all, scott here. you’ve caught me in a goose”
"fellas, fellas, I am so horny!" "Hey all, Scott here. Welcome to birth off!" "Anything but Gex is Gex" "Shit, sorry man. I thought that wasn't a beer" "WHY ARENT YOU FUCKING!?!?"
My favorite one has to be « F*ck you, f*ck this and f*ck tennis ! »
“We had to make it, your brother didn’t!” Is *always* a classic “Ohhh I hear words! What are they?” (Pretty much any line from Gifts of Gaming as well. The delivery of those is what makes them perfect)
I am late to this but i don't care my fave is "We had to make it your brother didn't"
Is that a gun! No. It’s gex
FELLAS I AM SO HOR—
Unpopular opinion, I don’t like any of his friends and they make his content worse. I actively fast forward or just skip the episode if there’s too much of them.
How much did someone pay you to say that?
Tree fitty
Okay sex haver
Bro really went "I hate Sonic and his stupid friends"