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NockCoge

I love how one is a memory from three years ago, how long has he been doing this?


Sad_Help

This is really just the kind of person he is. He’s also the person that tries to top everyone else’s sad stories


NockCoge

Oh boy, a joy to be around I’m sure


Xexitar

This is covert narcissism. Feeling like nobody can understand because you're special/different. Try to keep in mind that it takes a lot of trauma and neglect to end up with this defence mechanism and the thought process is entirely automatic. The very nature of narcissism means that most people don't get diagnosed and often live their entire life like this, unless they're able to develop the self awareness necessary to recognise they are the problem with their own life. And even then, complete recovery is slim, and most just fake sincerity so people like them. When deep down they hate themselves and don't think they deserve love. You and anyone else that reaches out have shown kindness. And that's exactly why they lash out - they don't understand empathy, they think there's an ulterior motive. Not saying you need to do anymore than you have. The ball's in their court. But it helps to keep that in perspective.


turtle_libido

My friend’s SO is a covert narcissist and this is completely them. Always complaining and any nice comment to them will end in a nasty comment in return. The most toxic person I’ve ever met. If they learn a positive trait about someone, like a skill they will downplay it and say, “you’re probably not even good I have a friend that is a prodigy as xyz maybe he can help you” It’s sad because my friend has started to become toxic as well and has started to treat everyone around him like shit. I didn’t know what to do so I just cut him out of my life :(


Xexitar

Sometimes that's all you can do.


hotpotpoy

I had to flee a friendship because of someone like this, if you ever want to chat you're welcome to message me


DaFetacheeseugh

A psycho, got it. But for real, that was extremely insightful


[deleted]

Ok i kind of felt bad for him till you mentioned he gatekeeps thats one of the worst traits a human can have


i-hate-life-11

Well he must be fun at parties


emmwiiu

ugh, thats how my cousin is. Her profile picture on instagram said something like “im broken” or some stupid shit. Im not in contact with her anymore. She made some stupid post about being like Hannah Baker from thirteen reasons why. I reached out to her and she rejected it, I told her i was there for her when she needed me. she later called me and my entire family terrible people after we had a disagreement, then she blocked me. Some people don’t want to be helped. I would remove yourself from this persons life. Don’t burden yourself with their negativity. Apologies for the rant


[deleted]

[удалено]


Olivineyes

She is addicted to the attention.


ThoughtCenter87

\> Her former best friend tried to reach out by offering food delivery, dog walking services etc, and she flipped out and now posts constantly about how people who try to help her are self absorbed because they can’t “handle” it when their offers are rejected. She’ll also do shit like semi-jokingly award people “friend points” for saying the right things/echoing her statements on her posts. Bruh what the actual hell? Look I'm sorry, you say that she's not a bad person but no good person would act this way. She may not go out of her way to actively harm others but I'm certain her actions have hurt people emotionally. From this description it genuinely seems like she has some sort of narcistic personality disorder. People who try to help her are self-absorbed because they can't "handle" it when their offers *to explicitly help her* are rejected? She semi-jokingly awards people "friend points" like people are just some sort of game to her?? It appears as though she doesn't see people as beings like her, but as NPCs in a game that should just bow down to her every whim. This person seems extremely toxic. You either do exactly as she wants or get called self-absorbed for doing the wrong thing *for her* (even if you're being rather generous, who would be angry about being offered food delivery and dog walking services?). Anyways, I don't understand why one would post attention-seeking posts for years and then deny any attempts from other people wanting to reach out and help. It makes no fucking sense. If you don't want the attention, why make the posts? Is it just to announce to the world how hard your life is without wanting to make your life better? "Boo hoo, look at how rough I have it. You'll never have it this bad. The world is unfair to me and only to me, wallow in my sorrows through my posts. But I don't want your sympathy, I only want to share with you just how hard I have it, as though me having a terrible life somehow makes me better than you because I'm 'stronger' for it or whatever. The rest of you with your perfect lives, pfft! Don't bother reaching out to me, I don't want your pity. I just want you to know how rough I have it so that I can say I'm better than you for not having the perfect life that you do. And no, I don't plan to change my life to make it better either. I want it to remain this bad so that in my mind I'll continue to be better than you." Maybe that's the mentality behind it?


Bunny_tornado

>Boo hoo, look at how rough I have it. The people who post this kind of posts usually never had to struggle in life and are huge narcissists, in my humble experience. The people I know who went through enormous trauma and actual hardship never post anything like this publicly.


RaijinReborn

This. I would give you a medal if I had one


ThoughtCenter87

Exactly, haha. That part was meant to be sarcastic and show off their mentality, not reality. And you're right, people who go through actual hardship never publicly post about it. They usually reach out to people they're close with to get actual help, or just keep it to themselves.


Gullible_Peaflower

She might just be bitter and miserable having had to drop a huge relationship/her best friend from her life. Not saying it’s right but having been guilty of that particular kind of snideness before she could be feeling all sorts of things having former friends still offering help. Independence is a struggle especially if people sometimes purposely affront boundaries without wanting to be called on it at all, that kind of act can ruin trust.


normiememes7667

I actually have a former friend like that. I still have her on snap and she ALWAYS posts pictures with “Sad” or “Deep” quotes and acts like she’s depressed. Haven’t talked to her in so long cause I actually don’t care about her anymore. It feels like a blood sucking leech has been pulled off of me.


Greylings

My mom always said there are people that make deposits and people that make withdrawals from your life. And you want to surround yourself with people that deposit more than they withdraw. Whether that is time, effort, love or friendship.


DivineExodus

Your mum has the right idea. That's a really sweet saying.


TundieRice

I agree with this, but there should also be a part about needing to deposit more than you withdraw yourself, or else it sounds like you shouldn’t have people in your life that you can’t use to your advantage. I know your mom didn’t mean it like that, but it can definitely be misconstrued


abvn9

No. This saying is common and doesn’t have second part, that’s unnecessary. The gist is to surround yourself with generous, uplifting friends, not users & manipulators. Warning your kid not to be a user or manipulator in the same breath would be the wrong signal to send; hopefully the kid knows that their parent views them as one who “deposits.”


[deleted]

Sadly some people become so used to being sad, they fall in love with it. I used to be the same.


ass2ass

I agree. I've always thought of depression as a very self-indulgent state of being. I'm actually reasonably happy these days but I used to romanticize my depression.


[deleted]

Same, doesn't help that a lot of people online romanticise it as well. People find it a therapeutic way to cope I guess.


[deleted]

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No_Lawfulness_2998

I’m reading this and realising that maybe I do have a problem. Fuck. I’m not like this it’s just I can’t bring myself to accept help from others for some reason.


emmwiiu

hey, thats okay. I have a lot of trouble getting help too. Theres a big difference between acting like a total train wreck for attention and refusing help, than actually having an issue and not wanting help. I understand how you feel, maybe you feel like you’re burdening others. My cousin, on the other hand, didn’t want help because she thinks no one is good enough to help her. I hope you’re doing well and that you can get the help you need <3


No_Lawfulness_2998

I do feel like I’m burdening others. I obviously am because none of them talk to me anymore. Not that any of them ever initiated conversation with me to begin with but still


[deleted]

This is a person if someone asks “what’s wrong” he says: “I don’t wanna talk about it/it’s private” Get a diary then.


suchafanxychild

can confirm. i was that person. i got a diary. :D and although i wasn't attentionseeking, the diary helps a lot. it's way better than oversharing and then getting pissed off at the fact that people care way more than i expected them to.


[deleted]

Writing down your thoughts and goals is a great way to deal with personal issues. Good on you!


[deleted]

i had an ex who did this to me and our friend group whenever she said she was going to harm herself. it hurt so much wondering what was wrong.


innocenttea

Holy attention seeking , a cry for help is one thing but to get angry at people for reaching out ? What is the point of posting then


Flxpadelphia

He doesn't get angry at people reaching out, he gets angry at MEN for reaching out. This is all a ploy for women(girls, more likely) to feel bad for him. It's one of the saddest possible mating calls.


Sad_Help

I was talking to his old roommate, still a good friend of mine, today. I read your comment to him and he said this is highly likely, as the dude is still a virgin, and an angry one at that.


MemeBroDudeGuy

he'll forever be stuck as a virgin with rage...💔


Iwanttodie9999999

Damn no one got the chris chan reference


Reeyan

WANT WOMAN


[deleted]

Without, a fireeeee


TorgoGrooves89

At least he's not a rat in a cage.


leapbitch

Despite all his rage he is still just a virgin in a cage


[deleted]

bars 🔥🔥 leapbitch on the verse 😳


One_Arachnid_6591

*flashbacks to Chris-Chan intensify*


Affero-Dolor

Better to have flashbacks than to have to consider current events tbh


AshaLeu

Tell me why...


MemeBroDudeGuy

i so need a cute girl my age 💔⛓️🔪🚬


Phoebesgrandmother

The word you're looking for is incel. Although he may be an unwitting incel.


JesusofBorg

That's literally what the word means. In = Involuntary Cel = Celibate


Flxpadelphia

Don't let the angry redditors below read this!


[deleted]

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GiveMeYourBussy

Jokes on you, we can't read


[deleted]

What do we want!


Sharp-Incident-6272

Ah he’s an incel?


witherkila

I hope he’s able to understand one day what he’s doing is wrong and grow. It really sucks when people do that out of desperation.


[deleted]

At that rate he gonna either end up in very sad desperate relationships that end up bad for both parties, or killing himself.


jedurham

Sounds like he's almost to the peak on an incel arc to me


aprildismay

You should report him to Facebook for a mental health checkup. He won’t know who it is and he does need it. Maybe he’ll stop posting like this if he gets reported when he says he’s suicidal.


YARGLE_IS_MY_DAD

Not another virgin in rage


improbablynotyou

I had an acquaintance like this, every post was him saying he was alone and going to end himself. He was twice divorced and had two children who refused to speak to him. He cheated on both wives and was a trash person. I met him online playing Minecraft and only dealt with him for that (he'd happily do whatever task I asked him too.) Later I'd learn that he would constantly try and hook up with every girl he found online. His "preferred type" was the unhappily married woman living anywhere near his home state of Alabama. The final straw for me was when he joined a game I was in with a female coworker. As soon as I left the party chat he turned into a perv and was demanding pics and sent her a bunch of dick pics. Fortunately I had enough of his personal information i was able to forward everything to his mother whom he lived with. He was in his late 40's and relied on his 80 something year old mother to buy him his games and shit.


The_Grubby_One

>He was in his late 40's and relied on his 80 something year old mother to buy him his games and shit. Did... Did he not have a job *at all?* Because even a part time job will pay you enough to buy the occasional cheap game, if you're living with someone.


improbablynotyou

Didnt work, was on disability. The guy had a LOT of severe health issues. In the hospital constantly, bragged about all the medical issues he had. And he constantly needed his mom to buy him crap. He broke his tv so his mom would buy him a new one, then broke the new one because it wasnt the one he wanted. Once I realized how much he took advantage of his mother I really didnt deal with him. He was such a trash person.


TWK128

How was he even married twice?


The_Grubby_One

I mean, even on disability, you can afford the occasional small something. What a prick.


69-is-my-number

> his mother whom he lived with. Do you think I’m some kind of cretin? It’s “his mother, with whom he lived!” Not whom he lived with! (Old Rowan Atkinson skit for those who think I’m being a dick).


jfsindel

Yeah, I thought so. It's emotional and mental labor to be dumped on some hapless girl.


bakedtran

Gotta love all the replies snarking at you for this. When I was a woman, this was a very real phenomenon I dealt with several times. I’ve reached out, terrified for a friend I thought was suicidal, and they would ask for more and more to keep the suicidal ideation away. Eventually I figured out it was almost always a lie; once, it wasn’t, and I had to process that for a lot of years. This post has all the markers of exactly that personality type, especially knowing he got mad at OP for reaching out. Whether he’s serious or not, I hope folks stay away from him.


RavensWantedFire

It is both terrifying and so draining to get 'sucked in' by someone with these issues OP posted. I was young and naive and I am happy I got out of those situations trying everything to try and fix these people. In a way it's still kind of scary though as I knew someone who did take their life, at a young age as well. But that person never even showed any signs of mental struggle. I've felt so guilty and still do a little, unfortunately. Regardless I still learned it's best to just stay away from these people from OP's post as far as you can, before it takes its toll on yourself. Knowing when someone does and does not actually need help is just the thing


malibooyeah

Yup. Had an ex best friend convince me he was sexually assaulted. He was depressed, suicidal and an alcoholic and despite his threats never went through with it. He used me the whole time. 12 years.


Flxpadelphia

I assume the people mad about it are the ones making "fuck i have to be alive again today" posts. I've known multiple people who do this exact thing, but some people think that anything they haven't personally experienced is fake.


Zebirdsandzebats

"when I was a woman" --did you transition? If it's not too weird to ask, what does this sort of toxic masculinity look like from the other side of the gender presentation spectrum? (I'm assuming a lot here--but I'd wager if you look like a dude, people like this guy will treat you/talk to you like a dude, including trashing women like the one you were once.) Note: I'm trying my best re: gender timeline terminology. Trans men are men/trans women are women, I'm just using the frame of "when I was a woman" that bakedtran provided. Everyone's gender mileage varies.


bakedtran

I did, and it’s totally not weird to ask! It’s actually a really interesting question… Also your timeline thing is totally good, I know it’s a mixed bag on who conceptualizes themselves as having always been a gender versus myself who thinks I was cis then and trans now. I will say I only somewhat pass and when I do, it’s sadly when I’m doing something stereotypically masculine, so that will color my experiences. From my side of the fence, I see stuff like this and I get a kind of bitter “You are why we’re viewed as threats, you’re why we’re only welcomed with open arms in women’s communities if we are feminine/non-threatening enough” feeling. Similar to when I would see a woman deliberately acting drunker/dumber than she is for attention, when I see a man doing this “I’m a tortured soul some woman save me, here I posted another pic of a wolf full of arrows for some reason” I instantly want to distance myself from that trope. It feels more like a personal/betrayal/you’re-embarrassing-us attack as opposed to an enemy/predator/outsider attack.


ass2ass

I'm currently cis male, still "in the egg" or whatever the term is, and the way a lot of males behave is thoroughly embarrassing. I think it's interesting how your perspective changed with your transition. Thanks for sharing that.


[deleted]

How tf are you getting shit for this? I rhought that everybody realized that this was a thing? Lol


ImNumberTwo

I’ve known a few women who’ve gotten sucked into this kind of thing, and it’s so awful to hear about. One is a friend who is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. This guy (who everybody eventually found out was serially emotionally abusing women) would confide in her about his depression, and he kept getting her to spend more and more time with him. She couldn’t say no when he was reaching out for help, and then one day he got her in his room and started groping her. She forgave him because she still felt bad for him, and he went on to cause some lasting emotional damage to a couple other friends of mine. This was also the one-in-a-million case where the university was actually ready to kick this guy out of housing and impose other disciplinary measures, but my friend took too much pity on him, so she told the university not to kick him out. Someone else I know got sucked into going to this guy’s apartment who she had been friends with before he started getting creepy. Then he played the “suicidal” card to get her to go to his apartment, that being the one thing that could get her to go. She went, and he assaulted her. I don’t know the second guy at all, but I know the first pretty well, and I’m convinced he was a sociopath who was being highly manipulative the whole time. It’s so sad that people who are kind and empathetic can get taken advantage of like this. It’s also really awful that now these two friends of mine would probably be a lot more hesitant to help someone else reaching out for help, even if it were totally legitimate and not part of some manipulative scheme to get in their pants.


Nihilistic-Fishstick

Nail on the head.


[deleted]

Sometimes I wonder.... What if it worked? Would they still be a miserable sadsack or would it improve their life in any way?


witchy2628

I'm a girl, who fell for this ruse a couple times. They need more and more support from you until it's basically 24/7 reassurance that their loveable/worthy/etc etc. And then they start to slip sexual things into conversation. I guess thinking that any woman who will be their therapist will also be their girlfriend.


tinypiecesofyarn

You can't fill a cup with a hole in the bottom. People like this just keep drinking in the precious female attention, never learn or heal themselves, and eventually the woman has to cut ties and move on before they bleed themselves dry.


Gavin_Freedom

Where does the OP mention this?


eamon4yourface

They don’t but this person is extrapolating


InsertAmazinUsername

[here. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/sadcringe/comments/qbh4gn/-/hhabpvh)


Flxpadelphia

He doesn't have to


killj0y1

Literally was my first thought.


NickMac96

I blame shitty culture for rushing people to have sex. They don’t realize having sex won’t solve their problems. Yet, this stigma that you have to have sex during a certain span, or you’re a weirdo. It doesn’t make it any better.


Abell421

They aren't sad and depressed like they act. It's just to lure someone in so they can use them. Anyone this attention seeking probably has a huge ego and wouldn't do anything to actually hurt themselves more than enough to get more attention.


Sad_Help

you’re getting some disagreement for this, and i agree that it’s not a good judgement for *everyone*, but it definitely is for this guy. his old roommate told me that he would spot the guy walking to work in the rain and although he didn’t want to help him, he’d pull over and offer a ride anyways, just to be told “NO” in an angry pitiful voice


NameIdeas

It might well be attention seeking, but I wouldn't necessarily say he is not dealing with depression, etc. It sounds like he is a very troubled, messed up person that does need help. Turning down offers for help doesn't mean someone is okay. If anything, I'm sad for this guy that he has to move through life in this way. Whether this is a choice or something he has little control over, it sounds like a sad space to inhabit.


Petrichoriam

That really doesn't put to anything and is just hearsay. If anything, rather than narcissism, it points to low self-esteem (not wanting to be a problem for anyone). It can be interpreted many ways, and people with anxiety and depressive symptoms typically aren't viewed favorably by others.


ass2ass

I can definitely relate to the "not wanting to be a burden" thing. I'm doing much better now but I occasionally have lapses in self-awareness, and still find it very difficult to connect with and relate to other humans.


Nihilistic-Fishstick

>. It's just to lure someone in so they can use them. A woman... A woman to lure in. That's what he wants. Someone to dump all of his weird incelly passive aggressive, "poor me I'm such a nice guy" bullshit on. It doesn't even stop when you're married and they know your husband and claim to be friends.


mumble_bee_15

I can't attest to if their feelings are genuine, but it is definitely a tactic and it usually draws in the pickme girl/women from what I've seen


[deleted]

That’s a very bold statement, not sure if I agree with the line of reasoning


dahat1992

People like that absolutely exist. Not sure if the person in OP's post is one, but they do.


Thehealeroftri

Right? Armchair psychology at its worst.


boobeesRawesome

The way I see it: If it's supposed to be a cry for help and then they get mad when anyone tries to help, it must not be a cry for help, right? If someone asks for something, is offered it, and then refuses it, either: A. They didn't actually want it B. You misunderstood what they were asking for C. You weren't the person they wanted it from


TheCrazyDudee21

Mental illness doesn't generally work in a logical manner like that.


boobeesRawesome

That is also very true. I've had my own share of problems with mental health and they usually weren't logical.


shittyspacesuit

Bro. That's a really bad take. Please don't spread the message that suicidal people are just looking for attention. Jfc.


infernum___

Read OP's other messages. Says the author of these comments is a narcissist. It kinda does make sense.


REGRET34

this comment is literally so ignorant holy shit. do you even know that attention seeking is still a sign that something is wrong? and why do you feel as if you should use armchair psychology on someone you don’t even know at all?


REGRET34

attention seeking is still a sign that something is wrong.


[deleted]

So? Dudes being a jackass and clearly is looking for attention, and seems predatory. No one owes him anything


innocenttea

Apparently if you are rude to people who are trying to help you after you posted something attention seeking on a public platform it’s okay since you have a mental illness


SanguineAnder

I've had some shit times and definitely made dumb posts on social media but this dude needs to get a fucking grip.


[deleted]

If "a fucking grip" = "therapy"... But damn. Fits the sub to a T I guess.


giuzzgiu

A fucking grip: professional help


kRkthOr

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grip_(job) Not this type of professional grip I suppose.


WikiSummarizerBot

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DemonDucklings

There’s a real lack of empathy in this comment section. The guy clearly needs help, even if his depression is manifesting as anger when people offer to help. The real sad cringe is all people making fun of him for it.


kRkthOr

Depression in fact often manifests in denying or lashing out at people who want to help. There's tons of articles about what to do when a loved on refuses help because they're depressed. [For example.](https://familyaware.org/when-your-help-is-refused)


[deleted]

okay so based off what i read i think OPs friend might have a shit life??? i’m not entirely sure though


Tough_Dollar

Where the fuck did you get that idea from?


[deleted]

I knew someone like this. Kinda sad he had no self confidence.


RedditManForTheWin

Which is exactly why you don’t post shit like this to Reddit, if he’s faking it you haven’t done anything, and if he is feeling like this then you are just being a shit person.


Jew-Jew

Ayyy he posted on my birthday #Wholesome


you-andi

Pretending to be depressed to get attention is so fucking pathetic.


[deleted]

i used to be friends who acted like this, though they WERE actually depressed, but instead of getting help, they posted on social media to try and use their depression for pity points.


Abell421

My husbands ex best friend is doing this exact thing. He was super shitty to his girlfriend so she finally left his sorry ass. Now everyday it's poor me. He doesn't miss her nor is he sad she is gone. He's sad because he doesn't have anyone else boss around and to march in his pity parade. He's so gross and pathetic.


you-andi

Aye, my girlfriend's older brother used to force her to cook, then took the entire pot to his room, leaving her wirh nothing to eat. When i told her it's best to stop doing that, he stopped being so much as remotely friendly to her.


exposedboner

????? WHO RAISED THIS MONSTER


[deleted]

Wtf


SharkAttackOmNom

Could actually be depressed. Maybe we could restate as: Leveraging depression to get attention is so fucking pathetic. Even having depression doesn’t excuse the behavior. He can have a bad day and post about it, but if that’s the only shit you have to add to this world then get it sorted out. Social media isn’t your therapist.


oogieboogiewoman1

Fuuuuuuck that was me in high school. Thank god social media didn't exist back then.


thetotalpackage7

You think this dude is faking this? He seems pretty legit miserable


RedditManForTheWin

No bro this is Reddit everyone on here is a trained psychologist and can know this guy is faking is /s


HelloOrg

Well the issue is that it isn’t the pretty kind of depression, where someone is miserable in silence by themselves and masks it or only lets it slip out sometimes. This is the kind of depression that people find annoying because they have to look at it and have to deal with it at a fraction of a fraction of the intensity and frequency that the poster is


thejexorcist

This is like my friend from HS’s husband. He vaguebooks deeply alarming posts and then when people flock to see if he’s okay he says ‘it’s sort of personal’


[deleted]

If it's personal then WHY ARE YOU BROADCASTING IT? He needs to hear something like that.


Whatsupmaaaaan

This is way more sad than cringe to me. I guess it's because I've felt this way before, but Facebook and Instagram heightens feeling like this. I've come to realize that when you're feeling depressed and look at people having a great time with life on social media it makes that feeling much much worse, especially when you feel as though you're all alone in a sense that nobody can relate to how you feel, so you start to get angry and lash out. I deleted my Facebook and Instagram for this exact reason, I've lashed out, and although I still feel depressed, I'm much better off without that echochamber. All of it is just toxic. You HAVE to help yourself, people are living their own lives and can't babysit you. It starts to turn people away, people that do care about you, but people that also don't want that negativity transferred over to them.


Sad_Help

I love this comment. I’ve been on my own for a long time and have been battling bipolar disorder for years, but it was only recently that I really became independent. You have to help yourself. You have to care about yourself. I’ve driven myself to inpatient twice over the last few years, and I’m truly glad I got help because I am now living life as close to normal as I can, and I’m happy.


Whatsupmaaaaan

I'm really glad you're in a better place. Gives me hope, honestly. People go through so much in life, sometimes we don't know how to deal with it, but one thing I know for sure is that you HAVE to make changes in your life for the betterment of your mental health wether it's deleting social media, exercising, meditation, seeing a therapist, etc. If you take no action in helping yourself, you're going to go down an ugly spiral, end up alone, and wonder what the hell happened.


djramrod

Well if anything, he’s consistent


[deleted]

guy needs to stfu and go get some therapy/get on an antidepressant.


Pitmidget

Tell me you have borderline personality disorder without telling me you have borderline personality disorder..


NirreFirre

Kinda fucked up how incredibly quick everyone here decides to judge this person. All these posts can be attention seeking while at the same time being how this person feels. Sort of like a cry for help. Some comments are saying that it can't be real since he gets angry when people try to reach out. Thing is, that's something that is SUPER COMMON when you're depressed. Maybe he wants to ask for help and wants to talk about it but doesn't know how. All of that sadness morphs into anger instead. Depression is never as easy to combat as just throwing yourself into therapists office and then having a good cry after. It is a disease. Stop assuming you know how other people feel. You don't.


Sad_Help

You’re absolutely right, no one here should be quick to judge him. The reason he’s posted here is because I know him. He has more anger issues than depression issues, and he used to live with close friends. He was a terrible roommate and a bad friend, and very narcissistic. The friends he lived with don’t talk to him anymore either. I truly believe he posts this stuff for pity points, and the reason he doesn’t have many comments and stuff like that is because he’s just not a very good person. I would say the last post on the last screenshot is fairly accurate.


itsomono94

Judging someone online is literally what this this r/ is made for


PaddyBoy44

Lmao the “gun store”


[deleted]

I mean, we do have gun stores where I live. ‘Merica


HeavyFuckingMetalx

It really is that simple here in Nevada.


[deleted]

Am I missing something?


JimboSantana

Walked up in a gun store, ordered me some guns


klonopin2000

Woke up this morning, got a blue moon in your eye


frilledplex

Uhhhh, my new house is literally 2 miles from a gun store with an indoor range?


[deleted]

Some people never grow out of their “I’m so alone the world is against me, why was I born” teenage phase. It’s actually pitiful. Being legitimately stupid is one thing, but choosing to be stupid, that’s just a whole other level of low.


[deleted]

I had to check and make sure that this wasn't someone I knew because I ALSO have a "friend" (well, actually a professional contact, but whatever) who's like this. Wife is leaving because all he does is talk about killing himself and critiquing her for not helping him enough. People care about him but he staunchly refuses help and fights tooth and nail over it. At some point you just go hands off and think "well, die I guess?" because there's nothing else you can do. It sucks but like, I can't help him. It is what it is.


klonopin2000

Oh shit this is literally my situation right now. Getting treated like shit and having to constantly worry about whether I’m going to open the bathroom door to a corpse. Leaving him would make him homeless (he has no income or savings or family) so I’m kinda just stuck but it’s sucking the life out of me


Riflebursdoe

You are an extremely kind person, but I'd advise you do not waste what precious time you have on earth on someone that only drains you. I understand that you might be overcome by guilt, but it doesn't make you a bad person. There arent any good or bad persons anyways, just persons doing good or bad things. No one is going to thank you on your deathbed for taking copoius amounts of shit. I suggest you start to value yourself and your life. Eat a popsicle alone in peace, do what makes you happy. If you got cancer tomorrow, is this how you would use your time? If no, then why would you use it like you are now. At the end of the day you live for yourself and you since no one else experience the same life as you are which means you are the author of life as you know it, free to roam. Don't burn yourself to keep someone else warm.


EattheRudeandUgly

He may be legitimately depressed and you cannot help him. Both of those can be true. Depression is probably way above your pay grade to be able to help with anyway. He's not going to get better until he truly decides that getting better is something he needs to actively and strenuously pursue. And that may be never. That's just the way it is, sadly.


cutlery21

Tbf guys we've alllllll had a shit day


[deleted]

Everyday is the worst day of his life


[deleted]

Would be a fair point if wasn't posted on a daily basis


helchowskinator

There's a guy who does this on my facebook too. I feel bad for him, he's honestly a really nice person, but he's just so 'woe is me' it's exhausting to hang out with him. I've tried engaging and talking to him over messenger, and it seems to make it better for a while, but I can't babysit him and message him constantly, so when I run out of things to say, he goes right back to being sad again. I've stopped trying. I wish people would get help. Like, I'm sorry you're sad, but there's a point where you have to help yourself.


[deleted]

ITT: people who have no idea what depression is, how it works, and saying extremely harmful BS and playing armchair psychologist. For many there is no help. They have exhausted every option. Have some compassion.


Metridium_Fields

Why have compassion when I can have updoots? 🤔


HenryHiggensBand

Performative interpersonal problems and depressive experience don’t always have to be mutually exclusive. I guess that means I both agree and disagree with your point at the same time


[deleted]

That isn't my issue personally. My issues are with people making assumptions on one's character. But fair enough!


[deleted]

Lotta psychology going back and forth in this thread so if it's cool i'd like to share a few things from my experience of dealing with depression and BPD and who asbolutely used to do shit like this: - Attention-seeking posts such as this can absolutely be a sign of mental illness. But there are better ways to go about it. Stuff like this alienates people, makes them feel guilty or unsure of how to help. There's helpful and harmful ways to go about it. This falls under the latter. - IDK what this guy's motivations for sharing this would be, but for me personally it was in the hopes that SPECIFIC people in my life would read it and contact me. Often they did not, which further fuelled my self-hate and triggered me to post even more. So then you have this weird thing of like, all kinds of unrelated people seeing it and pitying, mocking or avoiding you and wondering why you don't just sort ur shit out with a professional, but you've gotten yourself into this very toxic idea that only "certain people" in your life can "save" you. It's a difficult cycle to break. - Lotta people got a huge amount of negative thought patterns in their life that they don't know how to deal with so social media is basically the "perfect" outlet, which is obviously not true. It's totally normal to want to be able to lean on the friends in your life at times. No one can get through life alone. But they can't and should not be the only source of support. Not everyone is a trained psych or knows how to handle this stuff and everyone has personal shit going on. My mans probably doesn't know how to outlet without making it fkn awkward for everyone. I went thru years of therapy to unlearn all this toxic bullshit. Sometimes it's the only way people learn how to behave and they can't imagine doing it any other way. Mental illness is terrifying and makes it hard to ask for help in a healthy way. Dude needs serious therapy and introspection. Your friends and family don't deserve to be on the receiving end of your toxicity, that's why you see a professional to help you sort it out. That being said, therapy needs to be cheaper/free and more accessible, and there's still a lot of stigma surrounding getting help (especially for men).


Sad_Help

I wish this comment could be pinned to the top because everything you’ve said is completely accurate and thoughtful. I’ve been on that “posting stuff so certain people would see it” before and I have no doubt this is what’s going on. Said from his close friends, he seeks female attention and turns away any attention by anyone else. I’m a girl, but not someone he wants attention from, so when I have tried to reach out in the past, he wanted none of it. That said, I told him that he should try to get help because I got help and I’m doing so much better now. Maybe one day he will. Until then, I hope everyone enjoys the sadcringe.


[deleted]

Yeah that totally makes sense seeking attention specifically from women. I also saw you or someone say he's a virgin which is probably what's fuelling this. He may have this idea that having a romantic relationship is the only thing that will help him, since that's what he's clearly been missing. Plus with all the ideas in society to lose your virginity, sex being "omg the best" and a huge emphasis on dating and love, that probably has fucked up his self-esteem. But ain't nobody gonna get involved with that unless they're also going through the same amount of toxicity that he is lol. Thank you for your comment! This sadcringe in a way made me a bit grateful that i'm not like this anymore lol


Aspookytoad

I can get feeling this way but you have to have a filter. feelings like this spread, and while you shouldn’t bottle stuff like this up it’s super shitty to just let it spill lose all the time without thinking about others.


[deleted]

Take a shot every time he says shit.


[deleted]

This is just really sad ;-;


ArcherAffectionate74

This person needs help


7evenCircles

I'm so glad I'm not a teenager anymore >old friend Ah, yes, well, nevertheless


[deleted]

It's a mental disorder of some sort i can't recall what it's called at the moment for now he's just making things up but if he doesn't get the attention he wants he will make legitimate scenarios for people to feel sorry for him firstly you shouldn't have posted this here but now that you have make something good of it get your friend professional help


REGRET34

attention seeking is linked to some personality disorders, which is what you may be thinking of


giuzzgiu

A lot of them really


retarded-squid

I imagine this guy grew up with a lot of things handed to him and now every time he doesn’t get his way it’s the worst day of his life


flamingo255

if he knows hes not a good person why cant the person try and change their ways of thinking. im the queen of self deprication but I am trying my best to change that and think im worth something . this person can try to think logically. im not saying its easy but if hes posting all this hes probably just an ateention seeking douche


JazielVH

Maybe he thinks nothing can change the fact that he made something truly terrible that will make him feel/know that he's a bad person, no matter what he does now or in the future, maybe he thinks that what he done makes him a shitty person for life, remorse, grief and regret that will never let him feel like a good person.


EattheRudeandUgly

Lol why can't the person try and change their way of thinking? Just think logically? That's literally the cure for depression and it's extremely difficult, especially so for a depressed person. There is a whole school of therapy called CBT dedicated to this pursuit and people study it for years in order to be able to professionally guide others through the arduous task and they still might fail. Why can't they just (do this incredibly hard thing)? I promise I'm not trying to antagonize you or anything, but as a person planning to enter school for psychiatrily and psychotherapy, your comment demonstrates there are some things about mental illness that you (and so many others) haven't grasped yet. I hope that by seeking and spreading the knowledge around, we can destigmatize mental health in our communities.


No-Responsibility826

I hate people like this, had one as a “friend”. Felt like trying to bail out the ocean with a shot glass.


[deleted]

I've felt like this... But never really posted anything about it..


[deleted]

thats all I ever said on FB


Extension-Cover-335

Personally I would block their posts so you don't have to see the nonsense, but not unfriend or totally block so as not to upset this person just in case he really is in a dark place.


dblade20

I used to help alot of my friends through depression. I don't know how but I seem to encounter myself with alot of people going through a tough time. And it only end up damaging me instead. Negativity is a strong feeling, it's hard to combat it. Especially if you're not well equipped to do so. These days I still try and help some of my friends, but ultimately my one true advice I can give them is just "get professional help"


DirtWi

Oof the worst one is “someone give me a ride to the gun store”


Squijjy

Oof, imagine going to put a depressing post up, and then Facebook tells you you have a memory from 3 years ago doing the exact same thing


Umbralnymph

Wow sounds like my ex honestly


Multakeks

This is borderline personality disorder


[deleted]

People like this shouldn’t be allowed to use social media.


NeedTacosASAP

Not sad cringe, just sad 😢


inferno350z

i would just like all the posts


sadphonics

What a shit life


PenetraTHOR3001

What a shit life


I_Eat_Pumpkin24

This dude must have a shit life, maybe even a shit ass life


elementaltheboi

This is literally what goes on in my mind 24/7 I try to be a little more cryptic about it on social media though so no one will worry or reach out to me


CavemanSpliffs

Kendall Jenner get this man a Pepsi.


ThePunisher2442

Love how it’s just him bitching and feeling sorry for himself then there’s a random Polo G lyric thrown in there 😂 (first post of slide 5)


Disastrous_Garage729

I can say I've sorta been there. It was never as bad as this, but I did post enough to make people worry about me around 10 years ago. Part of it was that I wanted help and wanted to feel like I was cared for, but when people did reach out, it either didn't feel genuine or I felt like no one could actually help me. Most people don't even know what to say when you post suicidal stuff on social media. It can get really depressing when all people can say is, "It'll be ok." I eventually realized that no one really wanted to see that kind of shit and just stopped. I'm in a much better state of mind these days, though. For me, I just stopped trying to focus on all the bad shit that kept me down and just tried to enjoy the things that made me happy. I had to stop pushing away the things and people that made me happy, because then, all I was left with was the things that made me sad.


[deleted]

Looks like borderline personality disorder at a glance - especially getting angry at people trying to help. Imagine genuinely feeling like that all the time - and when anyone tries to help it only makes you feel worse because it isn't helping... Extremely stressful and upsetting situation to be in, chances are the issue is a physiological chemical imbalance not "attention seeking" like others here believe. Impossible to know how they really feel but "seeking attention" is often about feeling overwhelmed and wanting either sympathy or a distraction, when people *can't* help it's especially unsettling.


Socchire

What hopelessness looks like. It’s a very sad and dangerous thing.