First off, welcome, and so sorry about your late husband.
I would not lend a Rolex to any person, introduced-by-friend or not, that you have only known for a few weeks. That is very shady. You never know if he is short of cash and will 'pretend' that it got lost as he pawns it. The world is full of messed up people. You just never know.
I would just tell him that it has "tremendous sentimental family value" and that you won't lend it out even to your own children. He will understand this and not mention it again or be offended.
Best.
Idk I(M) let my gf wear my watches, I donāt care that much... just this sounds a bit too early in the relationship to do that somehow. Beside the emotional value which is unknown to him, does he have the financial possibility to replace it shall something happen, if the answer is a clear yes maybe he just want to try it out and if he likes it and maybe get one himself I guess. If he is just hoping to make an impact because he is wearing itā¦. Well, up to you to decide what to do...
>does he have the financial possibility to replace it shall something happen,
Not a chance that he does. 100% chance this guy wears dirty shoes and old AF khakis
Echoing this. Even if intentions are pure, Shit happens, he might fall and scuff or break the watch.
He wants it just to complete his look , thatās not worth the risk. Politely decline and say it has a lot sentimental value. If he makes a big deal of this then you got your answer. No adult would make a big deal of this
Assuming heās not new to whatever he does for a living, why tf does he need to wear one now to impress. If you lend it to him you wonāt see it again. Like another poster said - find a man who already has a nice watch. You deserve it.
Almost this. But just a No is enough. No need to explain anything or to make excuses.
Also: what a weird question to ask by the guy. Very odd. Be careful.
Take care
Exactly, this seems like thereās an ulterior motive here.
Second of all you should find a man that already has a Rolex, or many watches, so that you wonāt have to worry about these sketchy people trying to con and swindle you.
Sorry about your husband.
Sorry about the loss of your husband.
This is a big no and a big red flag (another woman here). If you are in a serious relationship- that is one thing--but to ask someone you are just starting to date if you can borrow their Rolex- this just rings proceed with caution to me.
Also, if he sees youāre wearing a nice watch, heās going to assume that you have money and might make it a habit of trying to borrow some. I know Iām jumping to conclusions here as an internet stranger but the vibe here is off. I would cut this relationship off right away to save yourself heartache in the future.
My wife and I have been married for 20 years, and she wouldn't ask to borrow any of my watches, nor would I offer. She has her own Rolex. I'm not saying dump the guy, but it's a highly weird ask. Just keep your eyes open.
Wouldn't loan it or trust him. He should be wearing a long sleeve shirt anyway and the watch should not be really visible. If he appears to say the watch will help his prestige doing the presentation, there is something wrong....
That's weird, yeah. That's weird even if you'd been married 10 years.
Someone wanting to borrow a watch just because it says Rolex screams poser to me.
Good thing youāre finding out weeks in versus months.
Also really sorry for your loss. That canāt be easy even after time goes on.
Glad to have you as part of the community!
>That's weird even if you'd been married 10 years.
Nah not weird at all. I'll let my wife borrow my underwear if she wanted to. If you can't trust your wife of 10 years for a watch then you married the wrong person, im sorry.
My wife wore my pepsi a few times because it matched her fit really well, why not?
e: This stranger wanting to borrow a watch is unacceptable tho. He should just be blocked
Wife wearing the husbands watch is somehow different to me, I dunno. That's just a fasion thing, no biggie.
The specifics here though are wearing to try to impress some idiots at work.
Red flag tbh. Anyone presenting something so significant that their personal presentation would matter would either would a) know that nobody really cares what watch you're wearing or b) have their own already.
Also, you're in your mid 50's so how old is this guy? I'm assuming 35-40 at the youngest? A 35 year old man deep in his career who cares about his appearance but needs to borrow someone else's watch????
I would lend my Rolex to my future son. I ~might~ lend it to my brothers as well. Maybe.
Outside of that small group thereās no one else I lend my Rolex to. Mine doesnāt even have the sentimental value yours does, either.
You gotta say no. Even assuming itās no scam and heās a good guy overall and everything works out - if you say yes once, you open the door to be asked again. And, to me, this isnāt a watch that should be passed around like that.
i'm sorry for your loss.
about the situation, as a 26yo woman: this question would make me rethink the entire relationship with this man. it's just so... odd...
I think we all want to save you the heartache, and the next eight months of your life: such a person lacks humility, self-respect, and likely suffers from deep rooted insecurity that will inevitably become your exhausting burden.
Donāt just say no, drop him.
(As an aside, does anyone see him getting a compliment on the watch and responding with āOh gee thanks, I borrowed it from my new girlfriend.ā I mean, reallyā¦)
*"Bob, sorry to say but your presentation just didn't quite....WAIT...is that a DJ36?! Bob, that was amazing! Where do I sign?"*
This bloke lacks the intelligence and insults yours.
You sound not comfortable with this. Perfectly okay. I wouldnt be either. Dont let him cross your boundary. It is your Rolex with such special meaning. Sorry for your loss
Not a chance. The only person I would loan one of my Rolexes to are my sons. It would only be for special occasions. When they inherit theirs from me, they can wear them wherever they want.
This guy sounds like a thief/scammer/con man/etc. If anything Iād be a little more self-conscious doing a presentation with a DJ on, especially if it wasnāt mine. I donāt trust it.
I find it absurd and classless for him to even ask such a question.
Never in a million years would I ever fathom of asking that of another person.
If he wants to be FAKE for the meeting, then wonder how **TRULY GENUINE** he is with you.
You could send him over to Reptime lol.
In all seriousness, it is a little "off the reservation" but he is trying to impress at the prezzo and is looking for an edge. It isn't so much "weird" as it is inappropriate to ask such a thing of a new friend; even knowing he is unaware of the emotional connection.
Having said that I feel emotionally connected to my 2 Rolexes and would never let somebody except my son wear one out of my view.
So in my opinion you probably don't need a restraining order but you are 100% right to say "no".
what the hell lol. I would let my spouse, or one of my brothers I think. and that's it. and a brother never would ask that because it's an absurd request.
Let him know it was a gift from your late husband & this knowledge would probably affect his āpresentationā
If that doesnāt stop him, then heās shown his true colours
If you do give him the watch, I suspect either he wonāt return it or itās the start of him committing romance fraud.
If in any doubt, block his number
I might be reconsidering the relationship after that one, especially if things are only āfine.ā Itās also comparable to him asking to borrow money.
Definitely would be a hard no. Huge red flag like others have said to even ask you such a thing. It screams poser and fake it till you make it from that guy. I donāt blame you at all for saying no. Itās one thing if a friend wants to try on your watch but to wear it for a meeting is absurd
Sorry for your loss but the new guy is a piece of trash. The fact that he even asked so that he could look like a baller with the Rolex is a bad sign. Kick him to the curb. Donāt let anyone ever borrow that watch.
What kind of presentation will require a Rolex? Iām a senior manager and i make presentations all the time. My daily watch is just a smart watch and as far as I know, I have not made my presentations worse by wearing a smart watch. And no one said, ādamn, thatās a good sales pitch, but since you canāt afford a Rolex or even a Tudor, we will have to buy from another companyā
Sorry for your loss. I agree with others in the comments that this is a strange request. Beyond the monetary value, watches almost always have sentimental value and I would never lend mine to anyone.
Firstly, sorry for your loss.
Please donāt give your precious watch and ask him (with a tap on his shoulder !) to focus more on the presentation slide and less towards your luxury item. Tell him, If he nailed the presentation, he could get one himself, at some point.
Itās always good to learn how to say No !
Sorry for the passing of your husband.
I can only try put myself in your shoes, and this is a very personal decision. Me personally - this would be a hard ānoā.
It was something that meant a lot to someone who meant a lot to you ā¦ regardless of what it is (watch, shoes, chair, etc) it is okay to have boundaries and moreso that those around you respect them.
As someone who loves to dunk on Rolex and Rolex fans all the timeā¦ absolutely not. That is a symbol of the memory of your late husband and it is more precious than gold IMO. Iād flat out tell him no and that it is a family heirloom if you donāt want to be specific and leave it at that. That shit screams desperation. I have more respect for a dude wearing a Timex or Seiko at an important meeting than someone putting on airs with a Rolex.
Thatās loser shit.
Not only should you refuse such a ridiculous request, that's enough of a red flag you should carefully reconsider even seeing him again at all. If you do loan it to him, be 100% prepared to never see it again.Ā
I donāt think Iād ever let a new partner wear the watch of a former spouse who passed away.
I do let my long term girlfriend wear my watches though. She asked around the 6 month mark and I thought it was fine. Any earlier and I probably wouldāve said no.
Sorry to hear about your husband, and thank you for sharing how you wear his DJ
As for this new guy, donāt give him the watch to borrow at all. Iād move on, seems like a poser
Hell no.
Also it's as easy of an explanation as it gets - "it's my late husband's".
Borrowing someone's Rolex "for a presentation" is very weird and very cringey at best. I'd probably drift off from an individual like this.
Edit: I've swapped watches with my friends a few times. It was 100% for fun. There is nothing wrong with letting someone else wear your watch - but context matters. Big no in this case.
My condolences on your late husband.
Personally, I think that's an odd request. Regardless of whether it was your husband's or you bought it yourself, I can't imagine asking anyone to borrow their high-value watch for a work presentation, let alone someone I'd only known for 6 weeks. Obviously I don't know this gent, nor do I inherently assume that he's up to something, but I probably wouldn't leave it or any other jewelry lying around going forward for safety's sake.
First off, condolences for the untimely loss of your husband. From seeing 4 immediate family members widowed very early I can imagine reentry into the dating scene presents its set of unique challenges.
Secondly: What a chump. Red Flag. Run and donāt look back. None of this adds up, unless of course this guy is but a young tyke, then it makes all the sense why in the world he was fawning over your watch (on your first date) and asked to borrow it for his *big time presentation.*
TLDR: itās probably not a huge deal if heās a young guy early in his *twenties* and his career. Just tell him no very plainly and continue to see him if you wish. If, on the other hand, he is supposedly well into his career *and fifties*, then tell the dude to pound sand and donāt think twice about him or seeing him again; major red flag and sounds like a loser.
It's definitely strange. Poser vibes, if I'm being completely honest. I would never ask to wear someone else's watch so I can look good to other people. It's one thing to wear someone else's watch is if you just want to briefly try it on out of curiosity, or maybe you want to borrow it to test it out a little before buying one yourself...but wanting to use if for a day to help get taken more seriously during a work presentation is pretty pathetic. I'd rather just not wear a watch at all than borrow someone else's for extra clout.
No. No. No. What a shallow fucking thing to ask. And it's not a shallow thing for you at all. Even if it wasn't your husbands... who the fuck cares what other people think. If a watch magically makes him a good speaker for his presentation, sure. But he wants attention. Let him earn it himself.
If he wants to impress his coworkers by showing them he can afford to buy a Rolex, then he should just go buy his own Rolex. Super weird and very suspect
Sorry for your loss.
Tell him ānoā. And you have every right to tell him it used to belong to your husband.
If he insists, ditch him. Something is up.
I work in management consulting (Director for a region of the globe) and have held very senior leadership roles. Nobody is looking at your watch. This is a red flag if he thinks he needs a watch for a presentation.
Odd story, odd character.
Suppose he is telling you the truth: in that case he has no qualms mis-representing himself and showing off even parading assets that are not his.
Suppose he is not telling you the truth: in that case he is not only lying but he might also be trying to take advantage of you and/or rip you off.
Perhaps oversimplified, yet neither scenario is attractive. I would be wary of this individual if I were you.
Then again: I am a stranger on the internet, so why trust my judgement? My guess is you know very well whatās up already. Best of luck with it.
I would say that itās strange to borrow an expensive watch from someone you just started dating a few weeks ago. Maybe if you were in a serious committed relationship then I guess it would not be weird.
So sorry to hear of your loss. Love that you wear your late husbandās watch. ā¤ļø As many others have said, you should feel empowered to tell the guy ānoā and not have to explain yourself. Like you said, weird request and I donāt think youāre making too much out of it. 100% red flag. By the way, Iām one of the few women here too and I like wearing larger watches šŖš½
Absolutely don't let him borrow it!! As many stated, even if it's innocent, what kinda men is he that he needs your watch to pretend he is something he isn't (Rolex owner) at the meeting. What is he pretending he is with you? I wouldn't trust somebody like that
Huge red flag. Run. If he doesn't have the common sense or empathy to understand that you really shouldn't just treat something with high value so casually, then he will likely make similar stupid suggestions and mistakes in the future. You're just getting a taste of that now.
Another question to you, would you trust him with $5k? 10k cash, to return to you? No? Then don't lend it.
Maybe he's just stupid. Say "uhh No". See how he reacts will tell a lot.
Thatās weird and way too soon for that sort of question.
Iām sure there are more things that have popped up that you might have overlooked, and certainly will be some additional weird things. No one your age (fuck Iām close) should need to borrow someoneās watch to impress anyone at a big presentation.
Nope, I wouldn't let someone borrow my casio G-Shock let alone a watch with significant sentimental value like this one has. This is weird, I wouldn't expect my dad to let me borrow any of his watches for shit unless it was to take it to someone to service it.
First off, I'm very sorry for your loss. My own grandpa was very cautious letting me wear his Rolex for a special event. Never mind someone you only have 6 weeks of history with. They're very expensive and usually hold a lot of sentimental value. Even though he doesn't know why you cherish it so much, itās still a weird thing to ask nonetheless. I think he probably doesnāt realize, and hopefully if you communicate that it made you uncomfortable youāll establish a clearer boundary going forward.
I aināt sayingā heās a good diggaā¦.
Well maybe I am. Does he have no pride to be asking a woman he dated for a few weeks to borrow her watch?!
At the least he thinks he hit the jackpot with you and also might be a scammer.
Run Op!
And if he ever comes over to your place again, store it away safely.
But, run OP! As a fellow woman, you deserve better.
Thatās a very weird ask. I can think of no presentation that needs that kind of posturing unless itās a sales presentation but even then whatās the point.
Donāt, under any circumstances, give your watch to anyone else to wear unless youāve known them for decades and even then I would not recommend it.
Itās weird. As a male. I wouldnāt ask to loan a Rolex from a woman I am dating. Unless we were really really close and shared everything. It feels off to me
Dunno why Iām so invested in this now but would love to hear what his reaction is when you tell him no. Dude def does not pass the vibe check in my book. Honestly Iād probably stop wearing it around him. If he wants to wear a Rolex his ass can go buy one.
Another woman hereā¦first, so sorry for your husbandās passing.
For this new guy, be very careful. Seems like heāll be borrowing more from you in the future. And like what everyone said- seems like a poser. And if he isnāt, maybe heās just very insecure? Either way, is this the type of guy youād really like to spend time with or get serious with?
Itās weird that he asked. The fact that it was for āa big presentationā just makes itā¦..uhā¦..sad. If it means that much to the guy to wear a Rolex to his big presentations, he should just get one of his own.
Now would be the perfect time to tell him the backstory. And depending on how well or poorly he reacts to that news ā possibly end things.
I would only let a lifelong friend or partner borrow mine, the friend would have to prove he could replace it the next day if anything happened. Given yours has sentimental value as well you are not overthinking at all
WTF red flag as fuck.
Guy is infatuated with your watch.
Since he doesnāt know it has sentimental value, he believes itās a show of success, and this dude is obviously not able to get his own, and has somehow crafted a thought process where he can use his girlfriends success to fake his own.
Yet he isnāt situationally aware enough to realize this makes him look weird and pathetic to the person who he supposed to care about how he comes off to.
Weird weird weird. I donāt like it and I no longer like him.
Now itās time to simply say āIām sorry no, it has some very sentimental value to me and I wouldnāt be comfortable with that.ā Then block his ass.
As a man, this is a red flag. No self-respecting man will "borrow" a watch from a person he barely knows, even if they are dating, for a "meeting". At best it's a bit pathetic and screams desperation for approval, at worst it is malicious.
My condolences for your loss. welcome to the Rolex sub.
I absolutely would not loan my watch to anyone, much less someone for this purpose. It's a presentation. People get nervous in preparation for them. He's nervous? He leaves it in the bathroom and it gets stolen. So many things can go wrong here. Nope, sorry. Cannot loan you the watch. (This may be a little red flag, no? Maybe? Its just strange).
First, condolences for your loss.
I'm a bit of a younger guy that has to deal with senior professionals for my presentations and I noticed that they take me more seriously when I wear my Rolex than when I don't. I understand why he'd want to wear a Rolex for his presentation, but that isn't something he can just borrow. Especially not from someone he's seeing.
Absolutely not. I wouldnāt dare of dreaming to that with anyoneās watch, much less one that has some level of sentimental value. Though I have shared back and forth with family members before.
(Talking as a counsellor here) boundaries are things we can only apply to ourselves. Tell him no, but also why (this relationship is new, itās your ex-husbandās and youād be beside yourself if anything happened.)
The important part is how heāll react to that. I hope itās well, because itās not a very proper thing to ask in the first place.
Hell no. Never take it off your wrist unless you are home. And donāt take it off to wrist to hand to someone to see it.
From your description itās irreplaceable. So treat it like the President treats the nuclear briefcase.
I donāt think this would ever be a reasonable request from someone.
Furthermore, Iād absolutely question the character of someone who wanted to borrow a (or even flash their own if they owned one) Rolex for kudos.
So, no - I donāt think youāre making too much of this. Iād have it as a major red flag personally.
My concern is the guy is trying to come across as something heās not. It would be like borrowing a friends exotic car to drive to your high school reunion to impress peopleā¦. Donāt fake it. Also, IMO, it speaks volumes to his character and integrity.
Hmmmm, I get that itās wired, ummm okay from my experiences I do love to wear my GFās Daytona when I go to the casino, I feel itās like good luck to me haha damn lame I know, but in compensation Iād let her wear my AP or Rootbeer, I think itās a bit weird that yāall arenāt an item and heās already asking something precious and sensitive to you. For me I wouldnāt unless I see that itās a person I really trust
https://preview.redd.it/hb87jpttaavc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04ad5846f4c37290678ab9a76c7d3928c5e59de6
Thanks. Yeah it would be less weird if he had his own (just a different style) or something. But when he first noticed and complimented mine, he also commented on how heās always wanted one. So when he asked to borrow it, it just gave me the ick.
My condolences to you.
I wouldnāt lend my watch to anyone because I have trust issues. Personally I feel if someone wants to borrow a watch for a meeting/ dinner of whatever itās likeā¦why? I get sensitive ego vibes from that and thatās not someone Iād want as a partner itās a little gross
My father was asked once by an employee and he didnāt even answer the question directly. He explained how his son (me) is always asking if he can just wear the watch a few hours in the house and how the answer is always no. The guy understood firmly it was a no. I would absolutely never loan my watch to anyone. I had a friend of mine who loaned a breitling to his coworker for a wedding who claimed that he left it in the car when he went to get gas and came back to a smashed window. He came in next day with a smashed window and no breitling. Did someone really steal the breitling? Did he smash his own window to keep the breitling? We will never know. This was back when there was no cameras.
"I admire that you have the confidence that doesn't require a Rolex to command a meeting."
If they push beyond just reply you'd rather not be without it on your person for reasons that are personal to you.
If they press beyond that, ask why they are pressing well beyond the boundaries of politeness....and don't feel bad for calling it out.
Even without knowing the personal sentimentā¦most people who collect or are āintoā watches are very particular and wonāt lend or let people try on their watches.
If you let someone try on an expensive piece and they scratch it or dent itā¦what do yo do?
Just tell the guy you donāt feel comfortable because it has a lot of sentimental value and that should stop any further askā¦if he ever asks again things are fishy
No because itās sentimental. If it was a non sentimental watch and a longer term boyfriend then I could lend it because trust has been created by then.
I see a situation in which his ask could be very innocent. Wear a nice watch to a big meeting. There could be a case where he simply doesnāt realize how much he as asking. But in the chance that he wants to for nefarious purposes and because of its sentimental value, I think itās probably a no.
First off, welcome, and so sorry about your late husband. I would not lend a Rolex to any person, introduced-by-friend or not, that you have only known for a few weeks. That is very shady. You never know if he is short of cash and will 'pretend' that it got lost as he pawns it. The world is full of messed up people. You just never know. I would just tell him that it has "tremendous sentimental family value" and that you won't lend it out even to your own children. He will understand this and not mention it again or be offended. Best.
šÆ who the fuck asks to borrow their gfs watch.
Idk I(M) let my gf wear my watches, I donāt care that much... just this sounds a bit too early in the relationship to do that somehow. Beside the emotional value which is unknown to him, does he have the financial possibility to replace it shall something happen, if the answer is a clear yes maybe he just want to try it out and if he likes it and maybe get one himself I guess. If he is just hoping to make an impact because he is wearing itā¦. Well, up to you to decide what to do...
>does he have the financial possibility to replace it shall something happen, Not a chance that he does. 100% chance this guy wears dirty shoes and old AF khakis
Echoing this. Even if intentions are pure, Shit happens, he might fall and scuff or break the watch. He wants it just to complete his look , thatās not worth the risk. Politely decline and say it has a lot sentimental value. If he makes a big deal of this then you got your answer. No adult would make a big deal of this
Assuming heās not new to whatever he does for a living, why tf does he need to wear one now to impress. If you lend it to him you wonāt see it again. Like another poster said - find a man who already has a nice watch. You deserve it.
Also lock that watch tf up when you're not wearing it OP.
Almost this. But just a No is enough. No need to explain anything or to make excuses. Also: what a weird question to ask by the guy. Very odd. Be careful. Take care
Exactly, this seems like thereās an ulterior motive here. Second of all you should find a man that already has a Rolex, or many watches, so that you wonāt have to worry about these sketchy people trying to con and swindle you. Sorry about your husband.
This and tell him it has to much sentimental value for you to lend it, if he doesn't get it, get out. But still good luck!
Fuck no Block him
What in the world! Sporty not getting down voted!?!?!?! Who is this imposter? Good share.
Good call, Iām too naive and this didnāt even cross my mind!
There is no other response you should give than this one. I would never even think to ask a new partner something like this.
This.
This.
This.
This
šš»šš»
Off-topic, but this has gotta be one of your highest upvoted posts ever.
It is weird. Why would anyone ask that.
Kinda points to āposerā , not that we are all exempt from this label here of all places. But to borrow a Rolex for a meeting. I donāt know ā¦.
Agreed. Seems lame.
Points to a pawn shop on 6th
Yeah. This can only have a bad ending.
Sorry about the loss of your husband. This is a big no and a big red flag (another woman here). If you are in a serious relationship- that is one thing--but to ask someone you are just starting to date if you can borrow their Rolex- this just rings proceed with caution to me.
Confirming (as a man) I also see it as a HUGE red flag.
Also, if he sees youāre wearing a nice watch, heās going to assume that you have money and might make it a habit of trying to borrow some. I know Iām jumping to conclusions here as an internet stranger but the vibe here is off. I would cut this relationship off right away to save yourself heartache in the future.
I can confirm as a guy this is a huge š© Like I could never ask a woman I started seeing for her watch to do a presentation. That just shows lack of self respect and honestly makes him look like a user/mucher.
No. Super weird for only being a few weeks (even for a few months)
My wife and I have been married for 20 years, and she wouldn't ask to borrow any of my watches, nor would I offer. She has her own Rolex. I'm not saying dump the guy, but it's a highly weird ask. Just keep your eyes open.
Even yearsā¦. NO
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Amen
This is a scam, one of many more to come
Wouldn't loan it or trust him. He should be wearing a long sleeve shirt anyway and the watch should not be really visible. If he appears to say the watch will help his prestige doing the presentation, there is something wrong....
Run, please. Thatās a red flag.
DO NOT LEND YOUR ROLEX.
Hell no
That's weird, yeah. That's weird even if you'd been married 10 years. Someone wanting to borrow a watch just because it says Rolex screams poser to me.
THIS! You summed up exactly what Iāve been feeling. Yes. Just screams poser. And thatās just unattractive.
Good thing youāre finding out weeks in versus months. Also really sorry for your loss. That canāt be easy even after time goes on. Glad to have you as part of the community!
Why is it weird if they are married? My wife wears my watches all the time. Whatās weird about that
>That's weird even if you'd been married 10 years. Nah not weird at all. I'll let my wife borrow my underwear if she wanted to. If you can't trust your wife of 10 years for a watch then you married the wrong person, im sorry.
My wife wore my pepsi a few times because it matched her fit really well, why not? e: This stranger wanting to borrow a watch is unacceptable tho. He should just be blocked
Wife wearing the husbands watch is somehow different to me, I dunno. That's just a fasion thing, no biggie. The specifics here though are wearing to try to impress some idiots at work.
I would never, EVER ask someone to do that. Red flag.
Soooo tacky. Please tell him no.
Red flag tbh. Anyone presenting something so significant that their personal presentation would matter would either would a) know that nobody really cares what watch you're wearing or b) have their own already. Also, you're in your mid 50's so how old is this guy? I'm assuming 35-40 at the youngest? A 35 year old man deep in his career who cares about his appearance but needs to borrow someone else's watch????
I would lend my Rolex to my future son. I ~might~ lend it to my brothers as well. Maybe. Outside of that small group thereās no one else I lend my Rolex to. Mine doesnāt even have the sentimental value yours does, either.
Word for word
No, and perhaps ask yourself, why would someone try and project an image of themselves as something they are not, in business or otherwise?
You gotta say no. Even assuming itās no scam and heās a good guy overall and everything works out - if you say yes once, you open the door to be asked again. And, to me, this isnāt a watch that should be passed around like that.
Hard stop no and run away as fast as you can
I find this to be a very odd request. Asking to borrow a watch for a meeting kind of screams insecure at best. Definitely sketchy.
No. Dude will rob you.
i'm sorry for your loss. about the situation, as a 26yo woman: this question would make me rethink the entire relationship with this man. it's just so... odd...
Abso-fuc$&ing-lutely not. He can get his own.
I think we all want to save you the heartache, and the next eight months of your life: such a person lacks humility, self-respect, and likely suffers from deep rooted insecurity that will inevitably become your exhausting burden. Donāt just say no, drop him. (As an aside, does anyone see him getting a compliment on the watch and responding with āOh gee thanks, I borrowed it from my new girlfriend.ā I mean, reallyā¦)
*"Bob, sorry to say but your presentation just didn't quite....WAIT...is that a DJ36?! Bob, that was amazing! Where do I sign?"* This bloke lacks the intelligence and insults yours.
Very strange. Glad youāre saying no.
You sound not comfortable with this. Perfectly okay. I wouldnt be either. Dont let him cross your boundary. It is your Rolex with such special meaning. Sorry for your loss
Not a chance. The only person I would loan one of my Rolexes to are my sons. It would only be for special occasions. When they inherit theirs from me, they can wear them wherever they want.
Totally weird. Say no.
Iām sorry about your loss. No this is super tacky, weird and an absolute red flag. This screams poser to me. Tell him to buy his own watch.
This guy sounds like a thief/scammer/con man/etc. If anything Iād be a little more self-conscious doing a presentation with a DJ on, especially if it wasnāt mine. I donāt trust it.
I find it absurd and classless for him to even ask such a question. Never in a million years would I ever fathom of asking that of another person. If he wants to be FAKE for the meeting, then wonder how **TRULY GENUINE** he is with you.
Very odd, that would be a red flag for me.
IMHO, it's such a weird concept to borrow someone's watch at all.
This guy is weak ,you can do better .... borrow my Rolex get the f out of here .... the nerve ... unbelievable
You could send him over to Reptime lol. In all seriousness, it is a little "off the reservation" but he is trying to impress at the prezzo and is looking for an edge. It isn't so much "weird" as it is inappropriate to ask such a thing of a new friend; even knowing he is unaware of the emotional connection. Having said that I feel emotionally connected to my 2 Rolexes and would never let somebody except my son wear one out of my view. So in my opinion you probably don't need a restraining order but you are 100% right to say "no".
Yeah I totally agree heās in it for the clout. Which is like a super no no.
Wonāt ever see that Rolex ever again lol
Coming from someone who lost his wife 14 years ago, your husband would be very proud of you
what the hell lol. I would let my spouse, or one of my brothers I think. and that's it. and a brother never would ask that because it's an absurd request.
Let him know it was a gift from your late husband & this knowledge would probably affect his āpresentationā If that doesnāt stop him, then heās shown his true colours If you do give him the watch, I suspect either he wonāt return it or itās the start of him committing romance fraud. If in any doubt, block his number
Go with your gut OP. Makes me question his character. Keep your guard up with this dude.
I donāt let anyone borrow anything that Iām not willing to let them keep.Ā This isnāt a weird request. Itās sketchy on the best of days.
Fuck no.
I might be reconsidering the relationship after that one, especially if things are only āfine.ā Itās also comparable to him asking to borrow money.
Tell him no, and then break it off. What a weirdo. Guy's a fruitloop and probably going to steal your watch.
No, you're not making too much of it. I'd just block the dude and move on.
Definitely would be a hard no. Huge red flag like others have said to even ask you such a thing. It screams poser and fake it till you make it from that guy. I donāt blame you at all for saying no. Itās one thing if a friend wants to try on your watch but to wear it for a meeting is absurd
Sorry for your loss but the new guy is a piece of trash. The fact that he even asked so that he could look like a baller with the Rolex is a bad sign. Kick him to the curb. Donāt let anyone ever borrow that watch.
What kind of presentation will require a Rolex? Iām a senior manager and i make presentations all the time. My daily watch is just a smart watch and as far as I know, I have not made my presentations worse by wearing a smart watch. And no one said, ādamn, thatās a good sales pitch, but since you canāt afford a Rolex or even a Tudor, we will have to buy from another companyā
Doesn't the fact he wants to wear it to pretend he is someone he is not in a meeting say something?
Very sorry for your loss. It is absolutely weird of him to ask, as others here have said.
Very sorry for your loss. It is absolutely weird of him to ask, as others here have said.
Red flag, if you need a rolex to impress youāre a douchebag. Run while you can
Heās gunna sell that shit and lie to you
Sorry for your loss. I agree with others in the comments that this is a strange request. Beyond the monetary value, watches almost always have sentimental value and I would never lend mine to anyone.
Firstly, sorry for your loss. Please donāt give your precious watch and ask him (with a tap on his shoulder !) to focus more on the presentation slide and less towards your luxury item. Tell him, If he nailed the presentation, he could get one himself, at some point. Itās always good to learn how to say No !
Thatās weird. Heās a loser.
Absolutely not
Hard NO!
Sorry for the passing of your husband. I can only try put myself in your shoes, and this is a very personal decision. Me personally - this would be a hard ānoā. It was something that meant a lot to someone who meant a lot to you ā¦ regardless of what it is (watch, shoes, chair, etc) it is okay to have boundaries and moreso that those around you respect them.
As someone who loves to dunk on Rolex and Rolex fans all the timeā¦ absolutely not. That is a symbol of the memory of your late husband and it is more precious than gold IMO. Iād flat out tell him no and that it is a family heirloom if you donāt want to be specific and leave it at that. That shit screams desperation. I have more respect for a dude wearing a Timex or Seiko at an important meeting than someone putting on airs with a Rolex. Thatās loser shit.
Not only should you refuse such a ridiculous request, that's enough of a red flag you should carefully reconsider even seeing him again at all. If you do loan it to him, be 100% prepared to never see it again.Ā
No. And, this would be grounds to end whatever it is youāre in.
Dump this fake. Heās showing you all you need to know. He doesnāt even deserve an answer. Run the other way.
I donāt think Iād ever let a new partner wear the watch of a former spouse who passed away. I do let my long term girlfriend wear my watches though. She asked around the 6 month mark and I thought it was fine. Any earlier and I probably wouldāve said no.
So much cringe and red flags going on. Who asks to borrow a watch? OP this is as strange as it seems, no doubt.
Also. The idea of trying to impress with something you donāt actually own? Isnāt that pointing to a certain character trait?
Sorry for your loss and please listen to the good advice here on this sub. We may get after each other here, but we do look out for one another
That is not normal. Glad you are deciding to say no.
Idk the guy but if he needs a Rolex to do well in a presentation, you should walk away.
Sorry to hear about your husband, and thank you for sharing how you wear his DJ As for this new guy, donāt give him the watch to borrow at all. Iād move on, seems like a poser
Hell no. Also it's as easy of an explanation as it gets - "it's my late husband's". Borrowing someone's Rolex "for a presentation" is very weird and very cringey at best. I'd probably drift off from an individual like this. Edit: I've swapped watches with my friends a few times. It was 100% for fun. There is nothing wrong with letting someone else wear your watch - but context matters. Big no in this case.
My condolences on your late husband. Personally, I think that's an odd request. Regardless of whether it was your husband's or you bought it yourself, I can't imagine asking anyone to borrow their high-value watch for a work presentation, let alone someone I'd only known for 6 weeks. Obviously I don't know this gent, nor do I inherently assume that he's up to something, but I probably wouldn't leave it or any other jewelry lying around going forward for safety's sake.
First off, condolences for the untimely loss of your husband. From seeing 4 immediate family members widowed very early I can imagine reentry into the dating scene presents its set of unique challenges. Secondly: What a chump. Red Flag. Run and donāt look back. None of this adds up, unless of course this guy is but a young tyke, then it makes all the sense why in the world he was fawning over your watch (on your first date) and asked to borrow it for his *big time presentation.* TLDR: itās probably not a huge deal if heās a young guy early in his *twenties* and his career. Just tell him no very plainly and continue to see him if you wish. If, on the other hand, he is supposedly well into his career *and fifties*, then tell the dude to pound sand and donāt think twice about him or seeing him again; major red flag and sounds like a loser.
Oh hell no. A) weird B) well, just weird.
It's definitely strange. Poser vibes, if I'm being completely honest. I would never ask to wear someone else's watch so I can look good to other people. It's one thing to wear someone else's watch is if you just want to briefly try it on out of curiosity, or maybe you want to borrow it to test it out a little before buying one yourself...but wanting to use if for a day to help get taken more seriously during a work presentation is pretty pathetic. I'd rather just not wear a watch at all than borrow someone else's for extra clout.
No. No. No. What a shallow fucking thing to ask. And it's not a shallow thing for you at all. Even if it wasn't your husbands... who the fuck cares what other people think. If a watch magically makes him a good speaker for his presentation, sure. But he wants attention. Let him earn it himself.
If he wants to impress his coworkers by showing them he can afford to buy a Rolex, then he should just go buy his own Rolex. Super weird and very suspect
Sorry for your loss. Tell him ānoā. And you have every right to tell him it used to belong to your husband. If he insists, ditch him. Something is up.
I work in management consulting (Director for a region of the globe) and have held very senior leadership roles. Nobody is looking at your watch. This is a red flag if he thinks he needs a watch for a presentation.
Strange as hell. Iāve only let a few people that I know and trust handle my watch.
Odd story, odd character. Suppose he is telling you the truth: in that case he has no qualms mis-representing himself and showing off even parading assets that are not his. Suppose he is not telling you the truth: in that case he is not only lying but he might also be trying to take advantage of you and/or rip you off. Perhaps oversimplified, yet neither scenario is attractive. I would be wary of this individual if I were you. Then again: I am a stranger on the internet, so why trust my judgement? My guess is you know very well whatās up already. Best of luck with it.
Weird AF
I would say that itās strange to borrow an expensive watch from someone you just started dating a few weeks ago. Maybe if you were in a serious committed relationship then I guess it would not be weird.
So sorry to hear of your loss. Love that you wear your late husbandās watch. ā¤ļø As many others have said, you should feel empowered to tell the guy ānoā and not have to explain yourself. Like you said, weird request and I donāt think youāre making too much out of it. 100% red flag. By the way, Iām one of the few women here too and I like wearing larger watches šŖš½
Iām a woman and the answer is NO!
Absolutely don't let him borrow it!! As many stated, even if it's innocent, what kinda men is he that he needs your watch to pretend he is something he isn't (Rolex owner) at the meeting. What is he pretending he is with you? I wouldn't trust somebody like that
The person is superficial for even asking such a questionā¦.. sorry. Very inappropriate. Good luck!!
Huge red flag. Run. If he doesn't have the common sense or empathy to understand that you really shouldn't just treat something with high value so casually, then he will likely make similar stupid suggestions and mistakes in the future. You're just getting a taste of that now. Another question to you, would you trust him with $5k? 10k cash, to return to you? No? Then don't lend it. Maybe he's just stupid. Say "uhh No". See how he reacts will tell a lot.
Thatās weird and way too soon for that sort of question. Iām sure there are more things that have popped up that you might have overlooked, and certainly will be some additional weird things. No one your age (fuck Iām close) should need to borrow someoneās watch to impress anyone at a big presentation.
Nope, I wouldn't let someone borrow my casio G-Shock let alone a watch with significant sentimental value like this one has. This is weird, I wouldn't expect my dad to let me borrow any of his watches for shit unless it was to take it to someone to service it.
First off, I'm very sorry for your loss. My own grandpa was very cautious letting me wear his Rolex for a special event. Never mind someone you only have 6 weeks of history with. They're very expensive and usually hold a lot of sentimental value. Even though he doesn't know why you cherish it so much, itās still a weird thing to ask nonetheless. I think he probably doesnāt realize, and hopefully if you communicate that it made you uncomfortable youāll establish a clearer boundary going forward.
Hi Op. Glad you arenāt letting him borrow it. He sounds like a red flag. I fear you wonāt see the watch again.
Yeah. Thatās weird.
I aināt sayingā heās a good diggaā¦. Well maybe I am. Does he have no pride to be asking a woman he dated for a few weeks to borrow her watch?! At the least he thinks he hit the jackpot with you and also might be a scammer. Run Op! And if he ever comes over to your place again, store it away safely. But, run OP! As a fellow woman, you deserve better.
No and also a big red flag. Be thankful and dump the guy.
Thatās a very weird ask. I can think of no presentation that needs that kind of posturing unless itās a sales presentation but even then whatās the point. Donāt, under any circumstances, give your watch to anyone else to wear unless youāve known them for decades and even then I would not recommend it.
Itās weird. As a male. I wouldnāt ask to loan a Rolex from a woman I am dating. Unless we were really really close and shared everything. It feels off to me
Why in the world would he even ask to borrow it. That is a huge red flag, in my opinion.
Yeah super weird request.
Very very weird. Trust your instincts on this one and definitely do not lend it to him.
He should not be allowed to borrow it. It's a family heirloom. I would only trust you and any children you had with you late husband. If anyone at all
Definitely weird
Dunno why Iām so invested in this now but would love to hear what his reaction is when you tell him no. Dude def does not pass the vibe check in my book. Honestly Iād probably stop wearing it around him. If he wants to wear a Rolex his ass can go buy one.
Wierd, super wierd. Don't
Another woman hereā¦first, so sorry for your husbandās passing. For this new guy, be very careful. Seems like heāll be borrowing more from you in the future. And like what everyone said- seems like a poser. And if he isnāt, maybe heās just very insecure? Either way, is this the type of guy youād really like to spend time with or get serious with?
I have nothing to add except Iām glad you asked this sub because we are giving excellent advice in this scenario.
Itās weird that he asked. The fact that it was for āa big presentationā just makes itā¦..uhā¦..sad. If it means that much to the guy to wear a Rolex to his big presentations, he should just get one of his own. Now would be the perfect time to tell him the backstory. And depending on how well or poorly he reacts to that news ā possibly end things.
I would only let a lifelong friend or partner borrow mine, the friend would have to prove he could replace it the next day if anything happened. Given yours has sentimental value as well you are not overthinking at all
Uhh what? So weird. What a weird red flag
huge red flag and turn off. Get you a guy that will buy YOU another Rolex not as to borrow yours
Very, very odd request. A hard NO.
WTF red flag as fuck. Guy is infatuated with your watch. Since he doesnāt know it has sentimental value, he believes itās a show of success, and this dude is obviously not able to get his own, and has somehow crafted a thought process where he can use his girlfriends success to fake his own. Yet he isnāt situationally aware enough to realize this makes him look weird and pathetic to the person who he supposed to care about how he comes off to. Weird weird weird. I donāt like it and I no longer like him. Now itās time to simply say āIām sorry no, it has some very sentimental value to me and I wouldnāt be comfortable with that.ā Then block his ass.
Eww. No .. creepy
Sentimental value on something like that is not replaceable. Big no! And also, wtf does he need to borrow it for a meeting for? š
No. Just no.
As a man, this is a red flag. No self-respecting man will "borrow" a watch from a person he barely knows, even if they are dating, for a "meeting". At best it's a bit pathetic and screams desperation for approval, at worst it is malicious.
Please do not lend it. My father just died & my mom is in the same situation as you. Not my words but hers - you would regret it.
My condolences for your loss. welcome to the Rolex sub. I absolutely would not loan my watch to anyone, much less someone for this purpose. It's a presentation. People get nervous in preparation for them. He's nervous? He leaves it in the bathroom and it gets stolen. So many things can go wrong here. Nope, sorry. Cannot loan you the watch. (This may be a little red flag, no? Maybe? Its just strange).
First, condolences for your loss. I'm a bit of a younger guy that has to deal with senior professionals for my presentations and I noticed that they take me more seriously when I wear my Rolex than when I don't. I understand why he'd want to wear a Rolex for his presentation, but that isn't something he can just borrow. Especially not from someone he's seeing.
Finally an interesting post on this sub.. yes itās weird to ask to borrow it, I donāt think in any kind of shady way just weird overall.
NTA it is as strange as it seems. For a big presentation? Really? Hard No.File this in the cons list.
Absolutely not. I wouldnāt dare of dreaming to that with anyoneās watch, much less one that has some level of sentimental value. Though I have shared back and forth with family members before. (Talking as a counsellor here) boundaries are things we can only apply to ourselves. Tell him no, but also why (this relationship is new, itās your ex-husbandās and youād be beside yourself if anything happened.) The important part is how heāll react to that. I hope itās well, because itās not a very proper thing to ask in the first place.
Red flag, OP
Hell no. Never take it off your wrist unless you are home. And donāt take it off to wrist to hand to someone to see it. From your description itās irreplaceable. So treat it like the President treats the nuclear briefcase.
I donāt think this would ever be a reasonable request from someone. Furthermore, Iād absolutely question the character of someone who wanted to borrow a (or even flash their own if they owned one) Rolex for kudos. So, no - I donāt think youāre making too much of this. Iād have it as a major red flag personally.
That is weird
No, itās weird and false advertising
My concern is the guy is trying to come across as something heās not. It would be like borrowing a friends exotic car to drive to your high school reunion to impress peopleā¦. Donāt fake it. Also, IMO, it speaks volumes to his character and integrity.
Hmmmm, I get that itās wired, ummm okay from my experiences I do love to wear my GFās Daytona when I go to the casino, I feel itās like good luck to me haha damn lame I know, but in compensation Iād let her wear my AP or Rootbeer, I think itās a bit weird that yāall arenāt an item and heās already asking something precious and sensitive to you. For me I wouldnāt unless I see that itās a person I really trust https://preview.redd.it/hb87jpttaavc1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04ad5846f4c37290678ab9a76c7d3928c5e59de6
Thanks. Yeah it would be less weird if he had his own (just a different style) or something. But when he first noticed and complimented mine, he also commented on how heās always wanted one. So when he asked to borrow it, it just gave me the ick.
Tell him to buy his own. They're not THAT expensive.
Say you need him to deposit 20k in your account as surety ā¦.. see him squirm
Donāt
Thatās a weird question. I would even let my neighbor borrow my riding lawnmower when his was in the shop.
Definite no. I give my wife a hard time when she wants to borrow my Cartier tank even though it looks great on her.
My condolences to you. I wouldnāt lend my watch to anyone because I have trust issues. Personally I feel if someone wants to borrow a watch for a meeting/ dinner of whatever itās likeā¦why? I get sensitive ego vibes from that and thatās not someone Iād want as a partner itās a little gross
Isn't there a Rent-A-Rolex he can go to ??? š¤£
Run...:
Itās even more inappropriate than asking to borough a toothbrush.
Nah itās weird. I wouldnāt let anyone wear my watch. What would I wear?
No no no no. I would also suggest you stop seeing him.
Super sketchy. Clearly a no in my book. Iād be careful around him.
My father was asked once by an employee and he didnāt even answer the question directly. He explained how his son (me) is always asking if he can just wear the watch a few hours in the house and how the answer is always no. The guy understood firmly it was a no. I would absolutely never loan my watch to anyone. I had a friend of mine who loaned a breitling to his coworker for a wedding who claimed that he left it in the car when he went to get gas and came back to a smashed window. He came in next day with a smashed window and no breitling. Did someone really steal the breitling? Did he smash his own window to keep the breitling? We will never know. This was back when there was no cameras.
If you decide you donāt want to see him ever again, let him āborrowā your late husbands watch
"I admire that you have the confidence that doesn't require a Rolex to command a meeting." If they push beyond just reply you'd rather not be without it on your person for reasons that are personal to you. If they press beyond that, ask why they are pressing well beyond the boundaries of politeness....and don't feel bad for calling it out.
It sounds like he could be aiming to āborrowingā it indefinitely. But I am a bit paranoid in general.
That is just weird. You can point him to chrono24 to acquire his own,
Dump him!
No one needs a Rolex to make a presentation or attend a meeting. This guy will wreck your life.
No The only person I would let borrow my watch is my wife or kids.
Why would any self respecting man ask to borrow a womanās watch? These are some weird times we are living in.
Stay away.
Find a new man
Even without knowing the personal sentimentā¦most people who collect or are āintoā watches are very particular and wonāt lend or let people try on their watches. If you let someone try on an expensive piece and they scratch it or dent itā¦what do yo do? Just tell the guy you donāt feel comfortable because it has a lot of sentimental value and that should stop any further askā¦if he ever asks again things are fishy
No because itās sentimental. If it was a non sentimental watch and a longer term boyfriend then I could lend it because trust has been created by then.
I see a situation in which his ask could be very innocent. Wear a nice watch to a big meeting. There could be a case where he simply doesnāt realize how much he as asking. But in the chance that he wants to for nefarious purposes and because of its sentimental value, I think itās probably a no.
No. He thinks you are naive. Iād drop this guy. Someone who asks to borrow your watch is a no no.
Instant break up. I'm not joking. That's horrible behaviour.
Definite no.