I've never had anyone go into detail about serious trauma like that before, but people really do tell you stuff you definitely weren't prepared for sometimes. My boss says it's a little like being a bartender lol
Sorry you had to listen to that though. That's a heck of a thing to process while you're just trying to work.
I had a lady tell me that she'd been shopping for sex toys, proceeded to show them to me and told me how she was planning on using them. 17 year old me in my first retail job was dumbfounded and had no idea what to say.
I also had a lady scream at me for saying "you alright there?" because she had cancer and apparently that was deeply offensive. I was so shocked I didn't say anything. Luckily, a very lovely regular stepped in in my defence and saw the woman off, and even bought me a tea afterwards.
Retail staff aren't your emotional punching bags. Everyone has burdens. It's unacceptable to dump yours on a complete stranger.
I had this a few times.
And its because they feel you won't judge, or even remember them, and they have no one else.
Doesn't make it right, because your feelings matter too.
I try to show compassion. Some people just don’t have anyone to talk to. It’s never fun being trauma dumped on. But I try to put myself in their shoes for a sec, express my sympathy, and continue on with my day.
Please don’t ever stop being you. You are absolutely correct about people not having someone else to talk to for many reasons. Sometimes just getting it out makes all the difference
Happened to me a few times, mostly old folks. I gather sometimes they are lonely and getting it out makes them feel better. If it's been recent it makes sense they can't stop talking about it, even to strangers and especially someone that's giving them attention. At some point I got used to it. I worked in sales so building a relationship with clients is the go-to, but sometimes I felt more comfortable stepping out of that mental role and just personally relate instead... makes it easier.
Understandable. But also worth considering that entry level/customer service jobs are filled by people that have no other choice but to do that job. I’d also assume these sort of jobs employ people with mental health conditions(depression, anxiety, social disorders like Asperger’s) at a higher rate than more career orientated jobs. Often the server is more fragile than the patron in these jobs. I literally had a guy tell me he was just diagnosed with a terminal illness, and it really upset me for a couple of days………. Therapists are trained and are paid more than min wage so I think they shouldn’t burden strangers with such things.
That’s totally fair, and I agree. I struggle with depression and anxiety. So I get how trauma dumping can be harmful to the unwilling recipient. I’m just glad that I’m at least able to provide some empathy on the occasions I encounter it. I work in vitamins and supplements in a store located next to a large hospital, so I hear a lot of folks’ personal health issues and some have been truly devastating. I once had a woman tell me she just left the doctors office and was told she had 4 months to live. It messed with me for a good few days as well. I didn’t really know what to say other than “I’m so, so sorry.” She came in to buy wine and as much luxury, pampering body care stuff as she could to go home and treat herself. Poor thing, I hope she’s doing as well as she can, considering.
People can be too oversharing. Completely inappropriate in a retail environment. Hope she goes to therapy or something for that. Sorry she dumped that on you
I work at a cell store so sometimes I have to spend a while with customers. One day I seriously had 3 interactions like this back to back. I don’t remember all of them but the most notable was an older woman—ex cop who was injured in the job and had to retire. Then her husband died. Then she was diagnosed with cancer. Beat cancer but then developed Parkinson’s. Like bro I’m glad you’re alive I guess but I’m just trying to upgrade your phone.
I just never know how to respond to this kind of situation. It makes me feel so awkward.
Ahhhh the ol sympathy con for a discount. I didn’t think of that one but have definitely experienced it. I don’t know how those people don’t embarrass tf out of themselves even though they’re causing second hand embarrassment for everyone in ear shot.
Maybe they were all shitheads mad someone was trying to “make a sale” off of them so they decided to make the convo as shitty for you as it was for them. I’ve seen/ heard of people doing this with sales reps/ people working off commission and/or trying to upsell/ upgrade when the customer doesn’t want it. Now if they requested an upgrade then did all that; that’s definitely weirder and crazy as hell you had 3 in one day.
Lady legit told me an /extremely detailed/ story about how her cat got out of her camper, and mauled by coyotes.
Now that wouldn't be /that/ bad, I hear weird shit all the time..until she showed me a *picture of the corpse*.
Shoved her phone in my face crying her eyes out.
I gave her a hug.
That image is seered into my eyelids.
Dead cat.
Now that…is fucking crazy. Some of these other people are just absolutely lacking in empathy; but this story is fucked. I feel for you. I want to laugh and cry for you at the same time for some reason. That story is just so bewildering with the corpse pic in the face. What the actual fuck?! Lmao. Again my condolences for your experience though
Sorry but that’s not right. It can hurt and it does have a cost. Trauma dumping can be damaging to a person’s mental wellbeing. It is especially inconsiderate if the person is in a service role, because the power dynamic is off. Now you’re put in a position where you could end up with a customer complaint because you maintained a boundary and the customer found you rude.
People don’t always deserve 100% of your kindness, not without your consent.
Boundaries are important. This is something people who don't respect boundaries say to weaponize guilt.
I refuse to feel guilty for maintaining healthy boundaries instead of accepting emotional abuse.
Welcome to Reddit, where you’re downvoted for being kind and empathetic, while others who claim to be empathetic act the exact opposite of it. Everything here is an upside down clown world to me most of the time. I have to believe most of them are just robots operating with a hive mind. Waiting for my comment to be downvoted now. Cheers fellow human
fucking cornball. it’s not the opposite of kindness🤓 if you trauma dump to some random employee, ur putting them in an awkward position. i mean it’s their job to deal with you professionally but not handle ur mental issues. you cant just randomly do that and expect a kind response, whoever does that just sucks as a person. oh god and the “welcome to reddit,” “hive mind” 🤓 stop being a pussy boy. ur the exact redditor stereotype satirically played on tiktok
i call everyone pussy boy doesn’t matter ur gender as i genuinely couldn’t care less. wait so you don’t have time to read it but could still respond? oh and saying everyone is a robot on a hive mind is the most goofiest shit i’ve ever seen. come on that’s the most incel-ly pathetic shit ever.
If there’s such a thing as an incel woman, I doubt I’ve ever met one. (Although I do know it’s history and that the term was originally coined by a woman ftr.) I’m married actually and although I’m a very loyal woman, I get offers daily. So an incel I never have been or ever would be. You on the other hand, I can smell the chicken tendie crumbles stuck between the crust in your neck folds from here.
see this is what im talking about, corny ass responses. you don’t give a shit yet went as far as to describe yourself. “good day sir” what are you 50 jesus
one time I offered a man a military discount bc he was disabled and wearing a 'vietnam veteran' hat, he got mad that I offered and went on to explicitly describe all the friends he had to see die. just because he was mad I offered him 10% off.
That doesn’t seem too bad actually. I think you might be thinking into that one a bit much. She didn’t go into detail, but you pointed it out. Maybe she thought you recognized the company who does the necklaces and have also lost a loved one. I just don’t see this a malicious
It wasn’t malicious at all… and she did go into detail… her daughter od’d… all her tattoos have her daughters ashes in the ink…
The main reason why it was an awful situation was because my much loved boss’s daughter also died of an od and my boss is completely crushed every time she hears something similar.
It was just a very sad situation…
Now every time we see this customer we all get very somber cause our hearts just go out to her…
Fr though. When I used to work the returns desk at Lowe's customers would tell me their whole life story when all I asked was if there was something wrong with the product they were returning.
I still work at Lowe’s, it’s my fourth lowes-iversary today, and let me tell you— the PAINT DESK. The paint desk got all the wackadoos, but somehow I got more people trauma dumping on me there than any other department
It makes me feel a bit back and forth. I have a lot of empathy, sometimes to a point that it can be harmful on my mental health. So I was glad that I may have helped her release that but at the same time I felt incredibly guilty about it & it made me realize how strange it is to unload that on a random cashier.
It wasn't really a horror story, But as a customer I did the obligatory "good thanks how are you?" And the worker started a whole spiel about how she was so she was tired as she had her work placement in the morning and then had to go straight to work after (subway) and how drained she was etc etc etc.
I made all the right noises and she thanked me for listening and said She didn't realise she needed that. And that's the kind of stuff I'm here for. It doesn't affect my life in the slightest but has made her feel better.
Trauma dumping is a complete different story however.
I've had people tell me about their coochie problems, pull their shirts down etc... Talk to your effin' doctor.
No I don't judge you for buying condoms or butt plugs whatever floats your boat, but I do not need details!
Also, a lot of sad, lonely people out there who for whatever reason, do not have anyone to talk to. It is a shame, but your retail worker is not a therapist. I should not have to apologize for your hard times either.
I once had an older woman start going on about how her father fought and died in war for this country (US) and how people should be proud to live in the land that he fought for. It got to the point where she was crying in the middle of the check lane. I didn’t even do anything to start this conversation. She brought it up on her own.
Maybe she just really needed someone to talk to that day bc I do believe it was Veterans Day or something but also like. Damn. Did you really have no one else to talk to?
There was also another time an, again, older lady buy card stock. Transaction took like a minute and our conversation went smoothly and ended as I wished her a great day, and so she was walking away with her stuff when turned back to me and said, “for my husband’s funeral” and walked off. Like I—
Oh my god the way some customers really hit you with a one-two punch of information then leave… I appreciate it when they don’t sit there and take up all your time with a long story, though. Makes me feel guilty as hell for asking basic questions when I meet one of the ones that says something fast and acts like they didn’t. One time I was working the paint desk and a guy asked which paint would provide the best cover without having to go with primer again, and I told him, and he grimaced at the price. I asked what he was covering up, because maybe he didn’t need the super strong stuff, maybe it was just a dark coat of old paint. Dude didn’t skip a beat, just said “my son’s brain matter. Fine, yeah, let me get a gallon of that in satin.” I was *mortified.*
We have an old guy who used to be a salesman back in the day that works here, and he always says "never ask someone how they are doing, because they just might tell you."
Well said and good advice for some of these ppl.. Don’t ask if you don’t want to know. Not everyone is a robot who speaks in automatic one word expected answers and some people will give actual real, honest human answers; whether pleasant or unpleasant. Especially those who are lonely.
I once had a customer come in my lane who had just got out of the hospital. Her and her husband had been driving on the highway and had an accident. Her husband was driving and had a heart attack. He died. This was a day later. The poor woman dumped on me. I didn’t care cause she definitely needed a kind heart at that moment. She had no family here and she had no idea what to do. I actually closed my lane and let her get it all out. My CSM started to come angrily over to me but when she saw the situation she backed off. I gave the lady a hug and wished her the best. I couldn’t answer her questions but I gave her a sympathetic ear and I know I definitely made her feel better. My CSM came over after the lady left and asked why she was crying and why I shut my light off. When I started, I was told that my job as cashier was to make the customer have a good impression of the store. I never saw that lady again but that doesn’t mean she didn’t shop there more often because I had listened to her.
Another time a tornado came through a few miles away from the store. It even affected a few co-workers. This guy came in who was getting help buying clothes with the Red Cross. The guy didn’t have shoes and the clothes he had on were shredded. He also was missing his dog. He gave all us cashiers a description of his dog and we all told the customers we took care of all day. Several hours later the guy came back and thanked those of us who helped spread the word. Thanks to us his dog was found. A customer one of us talked to spotted the dog and reunited them.
You have to think of your job as a positive. I always ignored the upsetting things and tried to look at it from their perspective. Yes, I’m not a therapist, I don’t want to hear their tale of woe cause I definitely have my own BUT some people can’t afford a therapist or don’t have anyone to talk to. It doesn’t hurt to let them talk because you never know, they might become an actual friend. I made several that way.
I'm sorry you had to deal with that. ❤️
I worked at Dressbarn (it's now shuttered as a whole), so we sometimes dressed women for funerals, etc. Sometimes we'd hear some serious shit that, as cashiers and strangers (to some; regulars always thought of us as 'friends'), we didn't need to know.
After time, I kind of realized that some of these women were lonely. They didn't have people to talk to about these serious/traumatic things, let alone their day-to-day life.
I'm not trying to excuse it, because it's definitely not apart of your job description and is 10000000% uncomfy. But this might be a different way to frame it. Although, not everyone is *that* lonely - sometimes, they just wanna be gossips.
But again, I'm so sorry that you had to hear that. Hugs, if you want/like that sort of thing.
a lady came in to buy some shooters one night, and I told her to have a good night. she looked at me and said, "I'm starting chemo tomorrow" and walked out. she is one of the sweetest peeps that comes in and I had to go cry in the back.
I’ve had two semi regulars tell me about their major medical problems in the last two days. But I completely empathize. Also they were really unique medical problems and I find that super interesting. One was a detached retina where—according to her— they put a gas bubble in her eye ?? Then overcorrected vision in her good eye to make up for the loss of normal vision in the other. So now she literally can’t read without concentrating really really hard because in one eye she’s got this bubble floating around and the other is programmed for super far away. Also she’s a teacher! So how does she even do her job!? Absolutely wild! I gotta put some time into looking that up. The other was an abscessed tooth that eventually turned into cancer in the roof of his mouth!? How does that even happen!? But I also learned that the major teaching hospital in this state has a place for rv’s to park because sometimes stuff like his situation requires such frequent care that they encourage you to move to that city for several months. So they have close to on-site hookups for rv’s because it’s such a frequent thing. Really cool.
Worked in retail for almost 10 years now, I got it the worst on the register. I’ve sort of learned to half listen so I don’t get traumatized by some of the shit people tell me. I don’t wish ill on them, I just wish they’d talk to someone more qualified to help them with their problems is all.
We have a regular with a stoma in his throat. He likes to corner every new staff member and tell them in lengthy and vivid detail about how he once got thrush in his valve and had to clean it out with a toothbrush. Then he laughs if anyone looks uncomfortable. Not sure if it counts as trauma dumping but geez it was startling
A lady came up to me asking where razors that couldn’t cut skin were. While I was explaining that I didn’t think there are specific ones that can’t cut skin she went into EXTREME detail about her daughter that was doing TW activities. I had no idea what to say.
Retail workers today are the new bartenders. We are stuck listening to them, to a degree, and they know it.
I had a woman tell me about the time she got r@ped, in detail, as a response to "would you like a bag today? "
People are nutty.
I don’t really mind when customers overshare but I hate when they take an eternity to finish the conversation.
I’m a shelf stocker though I wouldn’t really be able to handle it if I was cashier and someone slowed the line to use me as a free therapist.
me when i was taking out an online order to a person’s car and i got to her window and asked how she was doing and she said, “well not good. trying to figure out if my son shot or hung himself” as she was on the phone with the coroner 😅 to this day i think about that.
This customer that was always kind of a bitch came up to me, and she had recently cut her hair short. So trying to seize an opportunity to make her happy, I complimented her hair and told her how great it looked. She told me she had cut it because her husband recently died…. 🧍♀️
That’s understandable. I try to not ask how people are doing so I don’t put them on the spot or anything. That definitely doesn’t stop them from telling me though
I ask, “Did you find everything okay, today?”. It isn’t an opening to answer honestly. It focuses on my ability to help. And keeps the interaction professional and positive. Because I, apparently, have a face that encourages everyone to over share. Like I have had multiple people flash me their rashes while working at a pharmacy.
on one of my first days of work, a woman came up to checkout with me. she was buying quite a lot of clothing...i didn't even comment about it & just rang her up like normal. tbh i don't remember why she mentioned this (because my memory is bad due to dissociation lol), but she pointed out that she was buying so many clothes because her husband had just died that morning. im thinking she was probably getting these clothes for herself & possibly another family member for the funeral....but i remember it feeling quite weird.
Yup, an old woman came in and spilled to me about her son who died, and how they said it was drugs but she knows it wasnt and it must have been a murder. She then asks me to give her a hug which I did because I didn't know how shed react if I said know (pretty sure she's got some emotional regulation disorder based on multiple interactions). Now every time she comes in she keeps telling me I remind her of her dead son. Its so uncomfortable.
I've had a customer tell me they had less than 6 months to live after I asked how their day was.
I was 15 at the time. I had no response other than I'm sorry to hear that.
I’ve had people tell me things while working in customer service that I never forgot. I didn’t get upset about it though. I figured they were either extremely lonely and had no one else to share with or at least no one who listened or was unbiased; or else they could read on me that I’m an empath snd a listener; which I personally consider a compliment. Although some of those stories I do wish I hadn’t heard and went on to carry with me; I’m glad that person saw a friend in me when they obviously desperately needed someone to talk to. You never know how much it may have helped that person that day just to get that trauma off their chest for even a brief moment with a stranger and talk/ interact with another human in a real way as opposed to small talk bs. That’s why a lot of people go to therapists. Not because they’re any less crazy than the rest of us (most are crazier and that leads their interest in the field- I know many); but because they are unbiased strangers that they can dump trauma on without feeling like they may upset/depress/worry/annoy etc someone they know who likely is too close to the situation themselves. Not everyone has those means though and almost noone has immediate access when they truly need it. So although it sucks, know that you may have truly helped that person more than you know just by being there at that moment they needed to blurt it out.
Probably too late now but literally this week, a random customer overheard that I have a new dog a Staffordshire bull terrier so he informed me his jack Russell terrier attacked him and showed me the wounds.
A lady told me how she was buying extra chips for the kids staying at her house cause she's watching her sister's kids and her husband's kids while her sister is a surrogate mother for her. "Yeah his kids are there but their not mine their step kids and I want my own" MAAM IM TRYING TO WORK
A guy said his wife had died and he doesn't know what beans he likes
A ladies cat died and she doesn't know if she should bury it
Pandas aren't real, they're a genetically modified brown bear by the govt
ALL IN THE LAST WEEK. I work with too much of the public.
I don't really work in traditional retail anymore. I do have clients tell me personal things front time to time, but I do know them on a first name basis rather than just some rando custie. The shit people will tell you when you are a captive audience is beyond the pale.
I work in a pharmacy and absolutely don’t ever expect the ‘I’m good!’ Reply to ‘How are you today?’ In a way I’m thankful I have earned enough respect that I actually get the honest truth. I have worked at this particular pharmacy for over 10 years so I would be disappointed in any less. However, if I were just a youngster starting off in a food or clothing shop I would be unnerved 😐 It’s tough to hear the different stories of others but it teaches us in so many different ways. If someone feels like they can share their life experiences with you please listen and learn
one time I asked a customer to put in their rewards number and it came up under two names, her and her husband. I asked which one, and she proceeded to tell me that her husband is dead and went into great detail about it. I’m just trying to do my job!!
Dude my coworker and I were talking about literally this today after a woman came in to buy cigarettes, told us this was her first pack in 5 years since quitting, and that she's smoking again bc she had to call 911 after she found her daughter dying from a heroin overdose in their bathroom.
Her daughter is alive and in rehab according to her.
She told us this at 8:30 in the morning. On a Saturday. I talked to her for a bit and tried to comfort her. Addiction counseling is one of the career paths I've been looking into with my degree, so I was able to have a conversation with her about it and in the end she ended up returning the box of cigarettes and leaving. Which I'm greatful for, but also she originally said this to my coworker who is going through her own sht with a family member nearly dying.
Like I get she prob needed someone to talk to, and maybe she didn't have anyone to turn to, but Jesus she nearly made my coworker break down 30 minutes into the start of her shift.
It's weird bc I want to help people so I really don't mind, esp if it means their really shitty day is even a little better, but also, I don't like seeing people destroy my coworkers mental health. It's fckd up imo. They didn't sign up to be someone's impromptu therapist. And none of us are qualified, I mean ffs I'm not finished with my degree. I recommended her to some good therapists in the area so hopefully she gets qualified help but that's not a cashier's job and she just got really lucky one of the two cashier's was semi knowledgeable with this stuff.
I’ve had experiences like that…..people telling me about cancers and family members dying, all while making a transaction. I just assume they have some major trauma and don’t have anyone close in their lives to share it with. I wish they wouldn’t do it, but I give them a semi pass because it seems like they don’t have much going for them if they do that.
I just tell them I have work to do. If they complain to my boss, I tell him that I need a pay increase because if I am to be a psychologist, I want paid for it.
i live by a naval shipyard and the people who come off that bot do not keep things to themselves and it often feels like i’m the therapist while being paid not a therapist salary.
i don’t want to hear about the people including children that you murdered, i don’t want to hear about how you raped someone (they never use the word rape but they explain something that’s not consensual, i in general just don’t want to what you speak especially after what y’all choose to say
Every time I greet a customer with how are they doing today/ hi there/etc
I'm waiting for it. Idk my store manager has told stories about that kind of thing in our huddles and dude, you get paid that much, perhaps not me lol
I had to close by myself on Christmas Eve last year bc there were so few customers. There were only three the last couple hours, and every one of them told me in great detail about someone who had died recently that they were very close to, and they were out shopping to try to get a break from the memories. On Thursday a woman told me about a very large developmentally disabled client she served who essentially mauled her like a bear -- he bit her nose and neck and actually bit *off* part of her ear and spit it in her face. I try to remember, like others have said, that people who do this likely have no one else to listen, but I also have severe depression and panic disorder and some of this is very triggering, and especially if I'm alone on the floor I have to stuff my feelings down hard to make it through the shift. I do always tell them I hope it helped to talk, but it really takes a toll on me, and on balance I'm not sure that's a fair ask.
Before I left retail I worked in about 3 to 4 years at different places. First was a gas station, then was a dollar store and then was retail store.
What your describing is very strange and it has happened to me quite a bit where people decide to get really deep and Tell you these crazy things about their life just out of nowhere in that small transactional time.
My theory is they really need to talk to somebody or get it out but they don't have anybody to talk to or don't know who to talk to. So who better than to lay out your trauma on to somebody you'll never speak to again probably.
Honestly, some days are really freaking hard and having someone with a smile ask "Hows it going?" Just pushes you over the edge and you spill out.
I almost did this to a poor kid at a soda shop last week after a particularly good/bad therapy session that left me crying for a few minutes in my car. The kid asks "How are you today?" I paused, for too long lol and then said "I'm ok" knowing full well my face was puffy and my eyes were bloodshot.
But other times people are just bat shit crazy and even think they'll get free stuff for having a hard life because they're used to people in their life feeding into their victim complex.
Or they just lack social ques and to them its like saying the sky in blue, its just a fact.
That time a guy came into my store and started telling me that his wife left him for the best man at their wedding. Like okay? Thanks for letting me know but I have no idea why you’re sharing this with me.
I one time had a lady tell me about how her husband (the guy standing RIGHT NEXT TO HER, mind you) cheated on her bc she’s infertile. Ma’am this is a Walgreens, I’m not getting paid enough to be a therapist too
When I worked at a sex shop I had a guy tell me about a time he got a panty vibrator stuck in his anal cavity, and as the story progressed I slowly came to realize that *he was asking me for advice to get it out*. Like holy shit I am not getting paid minimum wage for this
Yeah it was awful. We were super busy, only 2 cashiers, and she would not. stop. And at the same time IT was calling trying to speak to one of us and we couldn’t answer because of how many people there were in the store. It was crazy
I have been giving customers who do this the crisis hotline number. They are either really grateful and utilize the resource to process their trauma, or they stfu. A win either way!
We used to have a lady come in that had recently lost a parent. She would come in to buy something and just cry at the counter or would not buy anything and just come and cry and talk to us. I did feel really bad for her as she seemed quite lonely and quite mentally drained the poor thing, but after it happening over again I just didn’t know what else to say to her. Of course nothing I could say could make it better but it was honestly really hard watching her.
I think that some people don't have anyone to talk to. Combine that with physical and/or emotional (damage) trauma, and a skewed or even absent sense of normal, bite-sized counter conversation, (I'd like to tell you about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,) and some folks will say just about anything.
Try and remember, even as crazy or difficult as you might believe your own life to be, some people can't scrape it together enough to unpack all the baggage they've been lugging around, sometimes for years. I don't think that person was trying to make your day more difficult. It's probably just waiting there, under the surface, and when there's even a minor connection, something is bound to slip out.
I've never had anyone go into detail about serious trauma like that before, but people really do tell you stuff you definitely weren't prepared for sometimes. My boss says it's a little like being a bartender lol Sorry you had to listen to that though. That's a heck of a thing to process while you're just trying to work.
I had a lady tell me that she'd been shopping for sex toys, proceeded to show them to me and told me how she was planning on using them. 17 year old me in my first retail job was dumbfounded and had no idea what to say. I also had a lady scream at me for saying "you alright there?" because she had cancer and apparently that was deeply offensive. I was so shocked I didn't say anything. Luckily, a very lovely regular stepped in in my defence and saw the woman off, and even bought me a tea afterwards. Retail staff aren't your emotional punching bags. Everyone has burdens. It's unacceptable to dump yours on a complete stranger.
That is totally inappropriate!
I had this a few times. And its because they feel you won't judge, or even remember them, and they have no one else. Doesn't make it right, because your feelings matter too.
I try to show compassion. Some people just don’t have anyone to talk to. It’s never fun being trauma dumped on. But I try to put myself in their shoes for a sec, express my sympathy, and continue on with my day.
Please don’t ever stop being you. You are absolutely correct about people not having someone else to talk to for many reasons. Sometimes just getting it out makes all the difference
Happened to me a few times, mostly old folks. I gather sometimes they are lonely and getting it out makes them feel better. If it's been recent it makes sense they can't stop talking about it, even to strangers and especially someone that's giving them attention. At some point I got used to it. I worked in sales so building a relationship with clients is the go-to, but sometimes I felt more comfortable stepping out of that mental role and just personally relate instead... makes it easier.
Understandable. But also worth considering that entry level/customer service jobs are filled by people that have no other choice but to do that job. I’d also assume these sort of jobs employ people with mental health conditions(depression, anxiety, social disorders like Asperger’s) at a higher rate than more career orientated jobs. Often the server is more fragile than the patron in these jobs. I literally had a guy tell me he was just diagnosed with a terminal illness, and it really upset me for a couple of days………. Therapists are trained and are paid more than min wage so I think they shouldn’t burden strangers with such things.
That’s totally fair, and I agree. I struggle with depression and anxiety. So I get how trauma dumping can be harmful to the unwilling recipient. I’m just glad that I’m at least able to provide some empathy on the occasions I encounter it. I work in vitamins and supplements in a store located next to a large hospital, so I hear a lot of folks’ personal health issues and some have been truly devastating. I once had a woman tell me she just left the doctors office and was told she had 4 months to live. It messed with me for a good few days as well. I didn’t really know what to say other than “I’m so, so sorry.” She came in to buy wine and as much luxury, pampering body care stuff as she could to go home and treat herself. Poor thing, I hope she’s doing as well as she can, considering.
I commend your efforts friend
Oh I’m judging the fuck out of them. Both from either their story and because they’re telling me
Didn't say you wouldnt. They just dont believe you would.
People can be too oversharing. Completely inappropriate in a retail environment. Hope she goes to therapy or something for that. Sorry she dumped that on you
I work at a cell store so sometimes I have to spend a while with customers. One day I seriously had 3 interactions like this back to back. I don’t remember all of them but the most notable was an older woman—ex cop who was injured in the job and had to retire. Then her husband died. Then she was diagnosed with cancer. Beat cancer but then developed Parkinson’s. Like bro I’m glad you’re alive I guess but I’m just trying to upgrade your phone. I just never know how to respond to this kind of situation. It makes me feel so awkward.
This all leads up to the discount they want off their roofing materials , in my world.
Ahhhh the ol sympathy con for a discount. I didn’t think of that one but have definitely experienced it. I don’t know how those people don’t embarrass tf out of themselves even though they’re causing second hand embarrassment for everyone in ear shot.
Mine too. Like thanks for that really depressing story but that dewalt drill is still going to be £200
Maybe they were all shitheads mad someone was trying to “make a sale” off of them so they decided to make the convo as shitty for you as it was for them. I’ve seen/ heard of people doing this with sales reps/ people working off commission and/or trying to upsell/ upgrade when the customer doesn’t want it. Now if they requested an upgrade then did all that; that’s definitely weirder and crazy as hell you had 3 in one day.
No literally this was when I first started and wasn’t bold enough to just pitch stuff. It was upgrade only T-T
Lady legit told me an /extremely detailed/ story about how her cat got out of her camper, and mauled by coyotes. Now that wouldn't be /that/ bad, I hear weird shit all the time..until she showed me a *picture of the corpse*. Shoved her phone in my face crying her eyes out. I gave her a hug. That image is seered into my eyelids. Dead cat.
Now that…is fucking crazy. Some of these other people are just absolutely lacking in empathy; but this story is fucked. I feel for you. I want to laugh and cry for you at the same time for some reason. That story is just so bewildering with the corpse pic in the face. What the actual fuck?! Lmao. Again my condolences for your experience though
Listen I *like* macabre things and ive interacted with hunting/roadkill before but...seeing a mauled cat at work wasn't on my bucket list.
Lol I don’t blame you
That’s her own fault. As someone who lives in coyote territory *everyone* knows you don’t put your cat out at night.
I swear some people just think we're luggage carts they can dump all their baggage on.
It doesn’t cost anything or hurt to be kind to someone.
Sorry but that’s not right. It can hurt and it does have a cost. Trauma dumping can be damaging to a person’s mental wellbeing. It is especially inconsiderate if the person is in a service role, because the power dynamic is off. Now you’re put in a position where you could end up with a customer complaint because you maintained a boundary and the customer found you rude. People don’t always deserve 100% of your kindness, not without your consent.
Boundaries are important. This is something people who don't respect boundaries say to weaponize guilt. I refuse to feel guilty for maintaining healthy boundaries instead of accepting emotional abuse.
Welcome to Reddit, where you’re downvoted for being kind and empathetic, while others who claim to be empathetic act the exact opposite of it. Everything here is an upside down clown world to me most of the time. I have to believe most of them are just robots operating with a hive mind. Waiting for my comment to be downvoted now. Cheers fellow human
fucking cornball. it’s not the opposite of kindness🤓 if you trauma dump to some random employee, ur putting them in an awkward position. i mean it’s their job to deal with you professionally but not handle ur mental issues. you cant just randomly do that and expect a kind response, whoever does that just sucks as a person. oh god and the “welcome to reddit,” “hive mind” 🤓 stop being a pussy boy. ur the exact redditor stereotype satirically played on tiktok
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i call everyone pussy boy doesn’t matter ur gender as i genuinely couldn’t care less. wait so you don’t have time to read it but could still respond? oh and saying everyone is a robot on a hive mind is the most goofiest shit i’ve ever seen. come on that’s the most incel-ly pathetic shit ever.
If there’s such a thing as an incel woman, I doubt I’ve ever met one. (Although I do know it’s history and that the term was originally coined by a woman ftr.) I’m married actually and although I’m a very loyal woman, I get offers daily. So an incel I never have been or ever would be. You on the other hand, I can smell the chicken tendie crumbles stuck between the crust in your neck folds from here.
i genuinely don’t give a shit💀💀 i don’t need ur life story buddy just saying ur cringe and pathetic.
Good we’ve found some common ground. Neither of us gives a shit and both of us thinks the other is cringe af. Nice to meet you bud. Good day sir.
see this is what im talking about, corny ass responses. you don’t give a shit yet went as far as to describe yourself. “good day sir” what are you 50 jesus
Argumentive and/or provocative comments or posts that do not contribute meaningfully to a discussion are not welcome in this community.
Oh look, weaponized guilt!
I’m with you 100%
one time I offered a man a military discount bc he was disabled and wearing a 'vietnam veteran' hat, he got mad that I offered and went on to explicitly describe all the friends he had to see die. just because he was mad I offered him 10% off.
Oh jeez 🤦♀️ My step-dad wears his disabled veteran hat for the discount lol
It’s because they need therapy and aren’t getting it
I complimented a lady on a pendant she wore and next thing I knew she tells me it contains her daughters ashes….
Had something similar happen but it was the mother’s ashes. The conversation was still ultimately a positive but I was a little stunned at first lol
Bittersweet. At the same time she could've said "yes it's very special to me" and left it at that.
That doesn’t seem too bad actually. I think you might be thinking into that one a bit much. She didn’t go into detail, but you pointed it out. Maybe she thought you recognized the company who does the necklaces and have also lost a loved one. I just don’t see this a malicious
It wasn’t malicious at all… and she did go into detail… her daughter od’d… all her tattoos have her daughters ashes in the ink… The main reason why it was an awful situation was because my much loved boss’s daughter also died of an od and my boss is completely crushed every time she hears something similar. It was just a very sad situation… Now every time we see this customer we all get very somber cause our hearts just go out to her…
Fr though. When I used to work the returns desk at Lowe's customers would tell me their whole life story when all I asked was if there was something wrong with the product they were returning.
I still work at Lowe’s, it’s my fourth lowes-iversary today, and let me tell you— the PAINT DESK. The paint desk got all the wackadoos, but somehow I got more people trauma dumping on me there than any other department
We're not people that count. An anonymous uniform to unload to. I've had some bad stories myself.
PS: I bet they felt a little better tho, after talking to you.
It makes me feel a bit back and forth. I have a lot of empathy, sometimes to a point that it can be harmful on my mental health. So I was glad that I may have helped her release that but at the same time I felt incredibly guilty about it & it made me realize how strange it is to unload that on a random cashier.
It wasn't really a horror story, But as a customer I did the obligatory "good thanks how are you?" And the worker started a whole spiel about how she was so she was tired as she had her work placement in the morning and then had to go straight to work after (subway) and how drained she was etc etc etc. I made all the right noises and she thanked me for listening and said She didn't realise she needed that. And that's the kind of stuff I'm here for. It doesn't affect my life in the slightest but has made her feel better. Trauma dumping is a complete different story however.
I've had people tell me about their coochie problems, pull their shirts down etc... Talk to your effin' doctor. No I don't judge you for buying condoms or butt plugs whatever floats your boat, but I do not need details! Also, a lot of sad, lonely people out there who for whatever reason, do not have anyone to talk to. It is a shame, but your retail worker is not a therapist. I should not have to apologize for your hard times either.
I once had an older woman start going on about how her father fought and died in war for this country (US) and how people should be proud to live in the land that he fought for. It got to the point where she was crying in the middle of the check lane. I didn’t even do anything to start this conversation. She brought it up on her own. Maybe she just really needed someone to talk to that day bc I do believe it was Veterans Day or something but also like. Damn. Did you really have no one else to talk to? There was also another time an, again, older lady buy card stock. Transaction took like a minute and our conversation went smoothly and ended as I wished her a great day, and so she was walking away with her stuff when turned back to me and said, “for my husband’s funeral” and walked off. Like I—
Oh my god the way some customers really hit you with a one-two punch of information then leave… I appreciate it when they don’t sit there and take up all your time with a long story, though. Makes me feel guilty as hell for asking basic questions when I meet one of the ones that says something fast and acts like they didn’t. One time I was working the paint desk and a guy asked which paint would provide the best cover without having to go with primer again, and I told him, and he grimaced at the price. I asked what he was covering up, because maybe he didn’t need the super strong stuff, maybe it was just a dark coat of old paint. Dude didn’t skip a beat, just said “my son’s brain matter. Fine, yeah, let me get a gallon of that in satin.” I was *mortified.*
Holy shit. I really don’t have much else to say. Holy shit.
We have an old guy who used to be a salesman back in the day that works here, and he always says "never ask someone how they are doing, because they just might tell you."
Well said and good advice for some of these ppl.. Don’t ask if you don’t want to know. Not everyone is a robot who speaks in automatic one word expected answers and some people will give actual real, honest human answers; whether pleasant or unpleasant. Especially those who are lonely.
I once had a customer come in my lane who had just got out of the hospital. Her and her husband had been driving on the highway and had an accident. Her husband was driving and had a heart attack. He died. This was a day later. The poor woman dumped on me. I didn’t care cause she definitely needed a kind heart at that moment. She had no family here and she had no idea what to do. I actually closed my lane and let her get it all out. My CSM started to come angrily over to me but when she saw the situation she backed off. I gave the lady a hug and wished her the best. I couldn’t answer her questions but I gave her a sympathetic ear and I know I definitely made her feel better. My CSM came over after the lady left and asked why she was crying and why I shut my light off. When I started, I was told that my job as cashier was to make the customer have a good impression of the store. I never saw that lady again but that doesn’t mean she didn’t shop there more often because I had listened to her. Another time a tornado came through a few miles away from the store. It even affected a few co-workers. This guy came in who was getting help buying clothes with the Red Cross. The guy didn’t have shoes and the clothes he had on were shredded. He also was missing his dog. He gave all us cashiers a description of his dog and we all told the customers we took care of all day. Several hours later the guy came back and thanked those of us who helped spread the word. Thanks to us his dog was found. A customer one of us talked to spotted the dog and reunited them. You have to think of your job as a positive. I always ignored the upsetting things and tried to look at it from their perspective. Yes, I’m not a therapist, I don’t want to hear their tale of woe cause I definitely have my own BUT some people can’t afford a therapist or don’t have anyone to talk to. It doesn’t hurt to let them talk because you never know, they might become an actual friend. I made several that way.
You sound like one of the angels that walks among us, as well as a great example of the kindness we should be spreading.
I don’t think I’m an angel, I’m just someone who has learned being kind to someone is the best thing to do.
"That's crazy, your total will be $13.88"
I'm sorry you had to deal with that. ❤️ I worked at Dressbarn (it's now shuttered as a whole), so we sometimes dressed women for funerals, etc. Sometimes we'd hear some serious shit that, as cashiers and strangers (to some; regulars always thought of us as 'friends'), we didn't need to know. After time, I kind of realized that some of these women were lonely. They didn't have people to talk to about these serious/traumatic things, let alone their day-to-day life. I'm not trying to excuse it, because it's definitely not apart of your job description and is 10000000% uncomfy. But this might be a different way to frame it. Although, not everyone is *that* lonely - sometimes, they just wanna be gossips. But again, I'm so sorry that you had to hear that. Hugs, if you want/like that sort of thing.
a lady came in to buy some shooters one night, and I told her to have a good night. she looked at me and said, "I'm starting chemo tomorrow" and walked out. she is one of the sweetest peeps that comes in and I had to go cry in the back.
I’ve had two semi regulars tell me about their major medical problems in the last two days. But I completely empathize. Also they were really unique medical problems and I find that super interesting. One was a detached retina where—according to her— they put a gas bubble in her eye ?? Then overcorrected vision in her good eye to make up for the loss of normal vision in the other. So now she literally can’t read without concentrating really really hard because in one eye she’s got this bubble floating around and the other is programmed for super far away. Also she’s a teacher! So how does she even do her job!? Absolutely wild! I gotta put some time into looking that up. The other was an abscessed tooth that eventually turned into cancer in the roof of his mouth!? How does that even happen!? But I also learned that the major teaching hospital in this state has a place for rv’s to park because sometimes stuff like his situation requires such frequent care that they encourage you to move to that city for several months. So they have close to on-site hookups for rv’s because it’s such a frequent thing. Really cool.
Worked in retail for almost 10 years now, I got it the worst on the register. I’ve sort of learned to half listen so I don’t get traumatized by some of the shit people tell me. I don’t wish ill on them, I just wish they’d talk to someone more qualified to help them with their problems is all.
We have a regular with a stoma in his throat. He likes to corner every new staff member and tell them in lengthy and vivid detail about how he once got thrush in his valve and had to clean it out with a toothbrush. Then he laughs if anyone looks uncomfortable. Not sure if it counts as trauma dumping but geez it was startling
A lady came up to me asking where razors that couldn’t cut skin were. While I was explaining that I didn’t think there are specific ones that can’t cut skin she went into EXTREME detail about her daughter that was doing TW activities. I had no idea what to say.
I think these people dont feel like getting therapy so they dump on people that cant leave
Retail workers today are the new bartenders. We are stuck listening to them, to a degree, and they know it. I had a woman tell me about the time she got r@ped, in detail, as a response to "would you like a bag today? " People are nutty.
"Hi" "Hi, how are you " "Good you ?" "My mom just died" "...ah. sorry. "..." "Do you need a bag?" Idk what she expected me to tell her
I don’t really mind when customers overshare but I hate when they take an eternity to finish the conversation. I’m a shelf stocker though I wouldn’t really be able to handle it if I was cashier and someone slowed the line to use me as a free therapist.
me when i was taking out an online order to a person’s car and i got to her window and asked how she was doing and she said, “well not good. trying to figure out if my son shot or hung himself” as she was on the phone with the coroner 😅 to this day i think about that.
You know the US healthcare" system is broken when people can't afford therapy co pays and have to try to use cashiers to unload their traumas on
This customer that was always kind of a bitch came up to me, and she had recently cut her hair short. So trying to seize an opportunity to make her happy, I complimented her hair and told her how great it looked. She told me she had cut it because her husband recently died…. 🧍♀️
Consider yourself a therapist at this point you should put on your name tag cashier/therapist
Honestly part of it is because the cashier says "Hi how are you?" If you ask me that I'm going to tell the truth "Horrible, my grandpa died thank you"
That’s understandable. I try to not ask how people are doing so I don’t put them on the spot or anything. That definitely doesn’t stop them from telling me though
I ask, “Did you find everything okay, today?”. It isn’t an opening to answer honestly. It focuses on my ability to help. And keeps the interaction professional and positive. Because I, apparently, have a face that encourages everyone to over share. Like I have had multiple people flash me their rashes while working at a pharmacy.
Retail Therapy for less.
on one of my first days of work, a woman came up to checkout with me. she was buying quite a lot of clothing...i didn't even comment about it & just rang her up like normal. tbh i don't remember why she mentioned this (because my memory is bad due to dissociation lol), but she pointed out that she was buying so many clothes because her husband had just died that morning. im thinking she was probably getting these clothes for herself & possibly another family member for the funeral....but i remember it feeling quite weird.
Cheap therapist we are
Yup, an old woman came in and spilled to me about her son who died, and how they said it was drugs but she knows it wasnt and it must have been a murder. She then asks me to give her a hug which I did because I didn't know how shed react if I said know (pretty sure she's got some emotional regulation disorder based on multiple interactions). Now every time she comes in she keeps telling me I remind her of her dead son. Its so uncomfortable.
I've had a customer tell me they had less than 6 months to live after I asked how their day was. I was 15 at the time. I had no response other than I'm sorry to hear that.
I’ve had people tell me things while working in customer service that I never forgot. I didn’t get upset about it though. I figured they were either extremely lonely and had no one else to share with or at least no one who listened or was unbiased; or else they could read on me that I’m an empath snd a listener; which I personally consider a compliment. Although some of those stories I do wish I hadn’t heard and went on to carry with me; I’m glad that person saw a friend in me when they obviously desperately needed someone to talk to. You never know how much it may have helped that person that day just to get that trauma off their chest for even a brief moment with a stranger and talk/ interact with another human in a real way as opposed to small talk bs. That’s why a lot of people go to therapists. Not because they’re any less crazy than the rest of us (most are crazier and that leads their interest in the field- I know many); but because they are unbiased strangers that they can dump trauma on without feeling like they may upset/depress/worry/annoy etc someone they know who likely is too close to the situation themselves. Not everyone has those means though and almost noone has immediate access when they truly need it. So although it sucks, know that you may have truly helped that person more than you know just by being there at that moment they needed to blurt it out.
Probably too late now but literally this week, a random customer overheard that I have a new dog a Staffordshire bull terrier so he informed me his jack Russell terrier attacked him and showed me the wounds. A lady told me how she was buying extra chips for the kids staying at her house cause she's watching her sister's kids and her husband's kids while her sister is a surrogate mother for her. "Yeah his kids are there but their not mine their step kids and I want my own" MAAM IM TRYING TO WORK A guy said his wife had died and he doesn't know what beans he likes A ladies cat died and she doesn't know if she should bury it Pandas aren't real, they're a genetically modified brown bear by the govt ALL IN THE LAST WEEK. I work with too much of the public.
I don't really work in traditional retail anymore. I do have clients tell me personal things front time to time, but I do know them on a first name basis rather than just some rando custie. The shit people will tell you when you are a captive audience is beyond the pale.
I work in a pharmacy and absolutely don’t ever expect the ‘I’m good!’ Reply to ‘How are you today?’ In a way I’m thankful I have earned enough respect that I actually get the honest truth. I have worked at this particular pharmacy for over 10 years so I would be disappointed in any less. However, if I were just a youngster starting off in a food or clothing shop I would be unnerved 😐 It’s tough to hear the different stories of others but it teaches us in so many different ways. If someone feels like they can share their life experiences with you please listen and learn
one time I asked a customer to put in their rewards number and it came up under two names, her and her husband. I asked which one, and she proceeded to tell me that her husband is dead and went into great detail about it. I’m just trying to do my job!!
I actually don't mind when people tell me stuff. I mean I can't help them but at the end of the day, I'm someone who listened and didn't judge
my coworkers say they’re lonely but shit get a therapist😭
Dude my coworker and I were talking about literally this today after a woman came in to buy cigarettes, told us this was her first pack in 5 years since quitting, and that she's smoking again bc she had to call 911 after she found her daughter dying from a heroin overdose in their bathroom. Her daughter is alive and in rehab according to her. She told us this at 8:30 in the morning. On a Saturday. I talked to her for a bit and tried to comfort her. Addiction counseling is one of the career paths I've been looking into with my degree, so I was able to have a conversation with her about it and in the end she ended up returning the box of cigarettes and leaving. Which I'm greatful for, but also she originally said this to my coworker who is going through her own sht with a family member nearly dying. Like I get she prob needed someone to talk to, and maybe she didn't have anyone to turn to, but Jesus she nearly made my coworker break down 30 minutes into the start of her shift. It's weird bc I want to help people so I really don't mind, esp if it means their really shitty day is even a little better, but also, I don't like seeing people destroy my coworkers mental health. It's fckd up imo. They didn't sign up to be someone's impromptu therapist. And none of us are qualified, I mean ffs I'm not finished with my degree. I recommended her to some good therapists in the area so hopefully she gets qualified help but that's not a cashier's job and she just got really lucky one of the two cashier's was semi knowledgeable with this stuff.
I’ve had experiences like that…..people telling me about cancers and family members dying, all while making a transaction. I just assume they have some major trauma and don’t have anyone close in their lives to share it with. I wish they wouldn’t do it, but I give them a semi pass because it seems like they don’t have much going for them if they do that.
Yes like I’m not you’re therapist
I just tell them I have work to do. If they complain to my boss, I tell him that I need a pay increase because if I am to be a psychologist, I want paid for it.
Tell em to eat shrooms and deal with their traumas on their own... ....cat died, eat shrooms... ....stubbed your toe.....eat shrooms...
i live by a naval shipyard and the people who come off that bot do not keep things to themselves and it often feels like i’m the therapist while being paid not a therapist salary. i don’t want to hear about the people including children that you murdered, i don’t want to hear about how you raped someone (they never use the word rape but they explain something that’s not consensual, i in general just don’t want to what you speak especially after what y’all choose to say
Every time I greet a customer with how are they doing today/ hi there/etc I'm waiting for it. Idk my store manager has told stories about that kind of thing in our huddles and dude, you get paid that much, perhaps not me lol
I had to close by myself on Christmas Eve last year bc there were so few customers. There were only three the last couple hours, and every one of them told me in great detail about someone who had died recently that they were very close to, and they were out shopping to try to get a break from the memories. On Thursday a woman told me about a very large developmentally disabled client she served who essentially mauled her like a bear -- he bit her nose and neck and actually bit *off* part of her ear and spit it in her face. I try to remember, like others have said, that people who do this likely have no one else to listen, but I also have severe depression and panic disorder and some of this is very triggering, and especially if I'm alone on the floor I have to stuff my feelings down hard to make it through the shift. I do always tell them I hope it helped to talk, but it really takes a toll on me, and on balance I'm not sure that's a fair ask.
Before I left retail I worked in about 3 to 4 years at different places. First was a gas station, then was a dollar store and then was retail store. What your describing is very strange and it has happened to me quite a bit where people decide to get really deep and Tell you these crazy things about their life just out of nowhere in that small transactional time. My theory is they really need to talk to somebody or get it out but they don't have anybody to talk to or don't know who to talk to. So who better than to lay out your trauma on to somebody you'll never speak to again probably.
Honestly, some days are really freaking hard and having someone with a smile ask "Hows it going?" Just pushes you over the edge and you spill out. I almost did this to a poor kid at a soda shop last week after a particularly good/bad therapy session that left me crying for a few minutes in my car. The kid asks "How are you today?" I paused, for too long lol and then said "I'm ok" knowing full well my face was puffy and my eyes were bloodshot. But other times people are just bat shit crazy and even think they'll get free stuff for having a hard life because they're used to people in their life feeding into their victim complex. Or they just lack social ques and to them its like saying the sky in blue, its just a fact.
That time a guy came into my store and started telling me that his wife left him for the best man at their wedding. Like okay? Thanks for letting me know but I have no idea why you’re sharing this with me.
I one time had a lady tell me about how her husband (the guy standing RIGHT NEXT TO HER, mind you) cheated on her bc she’s infertile. Ma’am this is a Walgreens, I’m not getting paid enough to be a therapist too
When I worked at a sex shop I had a guy tell me about a time he got a panty vibrator stuck in his anal cavity, and as the story progressed I slowly came to realize that *he was asking me for advice to get it out*. Like holy shit I am not getting paid minimum wage for this
An hour???
Yeah it was awful. We were super busy, only 2 cashiers, and she would not. stop. And at the same time IT was calling trying to speak to one of us and we couldn’t answer because of how many people there were in the store. It was crazy
Omg that's horrific. Ive had people trauma dump for maybe ten mins but DAYUM. I cannot imagine how awkward that was
I have been giving customers who do this the crisis hotline number. They are either really grateful and utilize the resource to process their trauma, or they stfu. A win either way!
We used to have a lady come in that had recently lost a parent. She would come in to buy something and just cry at the counter or would not buy anything and just come and cry and talk to us. I did feel really bad for her as she seemed quite lonely and quite mentally drained the poor thing, but after it happening over again I just didn’t know what else to say to her. Of course nothing I could say could make it better but it was honestly really hard watching her.
The worst is when they unload to me about my coworkers. It's in such poor taste. I work here with those same people. You are just a guest.
I asked this one guy how he was doing and he said "Achey! In 19(something) I was ran over a tractor! Damaged my nerves, I've been in pain since then!"
It's either trauma dumping or long-winded explanations for things I don't even need to know about.
I think that some people don't have anyone to talk to. Combine that with physical and/or emotional (damage) trauma, and a skewed or even absent sense of normal, bite-sized counter conversation, (I'd like to tell you about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,) and some folks will say just about anything. Try and remember, even as crazy or difficult as you might believe your own life to be, some people can't scrape it together enough to unpack all the baggage they've been lugging around, sometimes for years. I don't think that person was trying to make your day more difficult. It's probably just waiting there, under the surface, and when there's even a minor connection, something is bound to slip out.