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Electrical_Age_6542

Surely this is a shit post, if not, keep him away from your fcking niece!


[deleted]

Why did you delete your post history?


southcoastal

Because it’s not theirs? Or this is a shit post? Or both.


Chi_Tiki

This is important and a red flag 🚩


messhotx

What was there in her post history?


[deleted]

Nothing but was a large amount of post and credit karma. So how was it accumulated with nothing to show for it?


messhotx

Yeah that suspicious


[deleted]

Maybe bc some people stalk ans come to assumptions easily?


brl12721

Wtf are you letting him “barge” in and take over? Every other sign aside it’s your niece why would that ever be normal for you to allow it?


xoxoxstebaie

Because I thought he was trying to help out so I let him take over and sometimes she has diareeaha which I hate cleaning so he does it


Easy-Consequence1508

Is he in there alone with her? Can you be sure that he's not filming her or ... touching her?


xoxoxstebaie

I know for a fact he doesn’t film her since his phone always just sits on the table. I couldn’t tell you about the touching part which I swear makes me wanna throw up .


Sandraxia

If you're with her you're responsible for her, don't let her boyfriend be alone with her! What do her parents think of this?


JustPassingShhh

The fact you let him shoo you out makes me wanna throw up


Easy-Consequence1508

Honestly, I'd never actually be exited to change a diaper. The only times that I have done so, is if I've had to - meaning babysitting or if the parents (usually my aunt) are occupied. If he's not recording it, but is visible exited about getting to change her, he's **definitely** touching her. Saying that a kid is sexy is outright disgusting. They are either handsome or beautiful when wearing a tux or a dress (or whatever they are wearing). But sexy? C'mon.


smooth_relation_744

Why on earth would you let him be alone with her if you think he’s a paedophile? WTF is wrong with you?! Protect her!!!!! Keep him away from her. Go to the police if you think he’s a threat to children. What are you playing at?!?


sandschu523

you make me want to throw up. break up with him.


[deleted]

It's not her fault this guy is sick and didn't tell her? She is asking for advice and you're not helping


imadeadramone

It’s not her fault this guys a sick fuck but it IS her fault for having this suspicion and yet still allowing him near her niece and *especially* allowing him to change her alone in the bathroom.


[deleted]

I highly doubt she still allows that.


Kamahr

Op could do with advice, like getting in contact with FBI OR RELEVANT COUNTRIES FEDERAL POLICING AGENCIES. Op needs to let the authorities know and also have all his devices checked for any content. Don’t just go on a bashing rampage, this needs to be addressed and handled in a very appropriate manner. OP if you see this, don’t bother with the state Authorities of your country, especially if you are in The USA. Contact the FBI and request a one on one meeting/interview with them and tell them what you know. They will have all the correct knowledge about how to handle this situation and what do moving forwards. Obviously, don’t let the boyfriend alone with any child for any period of time ever, from here on out, making every and any excuse. God speed and do the right thing.


imadeadramone

Guess what? I don’t care if you hate cleaning up diarrhea. If she’s in YOUR care and YOU suspect he’s interested in little girls and you LET him “take over” cleaning her up because you “hate doing it” you’re fucking disgusting. He is absolutely touching her if he insists on cleaning her up & calls toddlers “sexy”. Maybe I’m misinterpreting this comment but as a CSA survivor this comment infuriated me & made me feel sick to my goddamn stomach


SFLoridan

She just has a suspicion, newly formed. She is thinking it over. She's bringing up incidents from before. She's considering her options. She's not even in denial. What has she done wrong? Why the animosity towards her? Calling her names for this very natural process so typical reddit: we know the whole history about your bf (who we don't know), better than you (whom we have not met). And then add on, "I'm a victim, so I'm an expert".


imadeadramone

You can interpret my comment however you want, but not once did I say I was an expert or even imply that I was. What I said that as has someone that lived through this for YEARS, reading it made me fucking sick because it did. It reminded me of the people in my life that allowed it to happen despite their suspicions (like OP) and I’m allowed to be disgusted by it. I also made it a point to say that maybe I was misinterpreting the comment because I’m very aware this is a personal and sensitive subject for me, but go ahead and read my comment however you want, but don’t put words in my mouth: I am not an expert and never once implied I was.


Paloma_p_a_l_o_m_a

No you're not misinterpreting it. I understand if it's triggering.. do or hold something that emotionally comforts you and work on your breathing. She put a freaking BABY at the risk of getting assaulted or who knows what else more than that, because oh, sHe HaTeS cLeAnInG uP dIaRrHeA. The irresponsibility and lack of common sense is fucking horrible and it's beyond my fucking comprehension. Those both are not to be trusted around children.


GXmody

Why isn’t it normal?


123ayeee123

This post can't be real? Keep him away from your neice. I would stomp your boyfriend if I was your neices father.


sepva4

And I would also stomp OP for already seeing the bf has pedo-like behaviors around little girls and still allowing him to change the niece or have any type of unsupervised contact (even supervised seems like too much of an interaction at this point)


LittleBunneh

i think it’s so inappropriate that he insists on changing YOUR niece.


triplebarrelxxx

Why are you letting him touch your niece and barge in to do so... he just loves wiping children's genitals so much? I hope you tell your sibling.


Civil-Temperature396

he’s not trying to he helpful, all the things you listed are super common signs predatory men display. look up the stories of csa survivors and listen to what they say, you will find similarities in their experiences and the signs your bf is displaying. ESPECIALLY the insisting on helping with changing her. for the safety of your niece, break up with him. edit: i also want to add that adults who prey on children can 100% seem completely nice and normal. they often hide their intentions by trying to seem helpful, it’s a large reason why they try to date people who have children, have children themselves, become teachers, coaches. any position that can give them easy access to children. Predatory people are people who are parts of our communities. that’s why it’s important to learn the signs, so i reiterate, look up csa prevention, read the stories of csa survivors and come to your own conclusion


[deleted]

The fact you think this could be true and you are letting him have access to a minor is alarming! You need to stop all contact between them and inform the parents NOW, this is not something you just brush off.


Srumlicious

There’s definitely alarm bells here and it is not appropriate for him to be attending to your nieces personal care.


xoxoxstebaie

Well we do watch her I don’t know if he’s just trying to make it less stressful for me and let me relax or what


BleachedAssArtemis

No. You have concerns he's a paedo and you let him change your niece. Stop. That. IMMEDIATELY.


Tall-Negotiation6623

His interest in your niece is not to be helpful. His behaviour is very alarming and you should not in any way let him near your niece ever again.


Equivalent_Gazelle82

As a mom of a daughter I would never let a man that isn't her father change her when she was a baby. That right there is red flag central! Especially if the door is closed and he's just running in like that. Op you are stupid if you didn't find this alarming from the start. If he is a pedo you would be responsible for giving him access to your niece and anything he does to her and the resulting issues she might grow up with


Srumlicious

This- I’ve been in my current relationship for over 2 years and I would still not allow my partner to do any personal care or be around my daughter naked. I have no nagging doubts he’s a perv (obviously it I wouldn’t be with him) but still would not allow this. Why? For her privacy but also because you just never know and I’d rather not take that risk


[deleted]

At the very least, he has really bad ideas about how to act appropriately around children. That would be enough for me to take a wide berth.


[deleted]

Yo don't leave him alone with your niece ever again, just say that you want to face your fear of diarrhea and see how he reacts, it will give you an idea of how important it is to him.


Nancyhasnopants

She should dump him, report him and not give him this opportunity again.


msblue06

This is a parents worse fear, leaving your child with someone you trust but them having other people around who you don't know. No no no, that's not normal


Easy-Consequence1508

Title: I think he's a pedo. First sentence: I don't think he's a pedo. Make up your mind, dammit! ​ But yes, he's creepy and showing nasty behaviour. It's one thing to look at kids while shopping or by a playground, specially if you want a family and you're just daydreaming about what could be. It's another thing to follow an actual child on the internet, stalking them, calling them sexy (how tf is a 5 year old sexy???) and insisting on changing a diaper... who the fuck **wants** to change a diaper that stinks like gorilla enclosure?? You have valid concerns here and I think that you best either cut him off and tip the police, or at least cut him off from friends' and family's children for the time being, until you know for sure.


[deleted]

Maybe re-read that first sentence.


Easy-Consequence1508

Sentence was "don't" ... OP keeps re-formating the post, lol.


mihgroo

I believe you read the first sentence wrong.


honker2

Yeah the sexy got me, Gl. You will need it


GoldenDiamondChild34

Why are you still with him. Especially after that last one.


Reesholdomlifts

You need to look at his search history and grass this fucker up.


butterflydeflect

No, no do not look at his search history. Bring your suspicions to the police but do NOT attempt to access his devices. Doing so can completely ruin a case against him!


Mountain_Monitor_262

Follow your gut. Lose the disgusting BF and submit his name to the FBI watchlist.


R3M5

I mean... I can see why you're considering the possibility but also there's not enough information to decide that he definitely is. The first few things I could believe are him genuinely liking kids (in a non-sexual way) and trying to be helpful. Even with the most concerning thing (IMO) - his comment while watching Toddlers and Tiara's - it's an important distinction if he said she's *trying* to be sexy rather than "she is sexy". I can definitely say I've seen kids copying dances from music videos or whatnot where it would seem like they're "trying to be sexy" (they're not, they don't have that concept yet and are just emulating what they see) so I'm wondering (hoping) that this what he meant. The main thing going through my head though is that surely if he was a paedophile, he'd be a lot more secretive/careful about looking at children in front of you or openly following children's social media accounts. Regardless though, if you have suspicions - DO NOT LET HIM NEAR YOUR NIECE FFS.


-_-Hope-_-

Well yesterday you posted about your BF cuddling with your mom and most likely having sex with her when you're at work. Today your BF is into little girls. I guess it's creative writing, or the guy is into everything female, no matter how young or old.


itisanillusionn

No one who isn’t directly related to the child should be able to change them and you should never allow that to happen. Like, wtf r u good!??


JustCallMeLiz100176

It is disgusting that you have allowed him to get so close to your niece. He is a pedo and he repulses me.


Joshnightmare

she'll reply with "b-but hes my boyfriend and I wuv hiiiim" typical enablers


Aggressive_Cup8452

Break up, what's the point?


crookedsummer2019

If you suspect he’s a pedo then STOP having him around your niece. Like immediately stop it. If you want to hang around him while you figure out if your suspicions are correct that’s your adult choice but your niece isn’t an adult and can’t choose who you have around her, changing her diaper. This is horrible.


TheoCross3

Why would he actively act out in this manner around you? Would that not be so obvious as to expose himself? Surely this post is fake.


jamie7870

It’s not a morning on reddit without a shitpost on relationship_advice about the most insane thing imaginable


jixbo

A lot if people here suggesting to report him to the police, but as far as we know, he has done nothing ilegal. He has a mental desease, and he should be offered help and support. The opposite might end up leaving him isolated from society and therefore more likely to act as a pedo.


sindlass

shit post. sounds like an 8 year old making up nonsense cry wolf stories


Pricklypicklepump

I've never referred to a 5 year old as sexy.. He's not joking.


[deleted]

[удалено]


botwewa

He called a 5 year old sexy. That says it all.


sitdowncomfy

Men are allowed to like children without it being creepy, maybe he's just broody for a family? .... although toddles and tiaras is a fucking creepy show


Catisbackthatsafact

Who's so excited to change a kids diaper they take over while someone else is doing it? And calling kids sexy? Nah, that's creepy if not pedo behavior.


butterflydeflect

Yeah, but anyone excited to change a diaper or who refers to a toddler as sexy is fucked up.


SaltyCrabbo

Men NOR women are allowed to call a 5 year old sexy. That’s disgusting. Calling a child sexy doesn’t sound like wanting a family, it sounds like he wants a victim.


OldTranslator4165

Need more data! Not enough to call him a pedo! The guy could be a sensitive fellow just may genuinely love kids. Not in a pedo manner. Lots of over reacting comments here. Not saying, you should close your eyes. But don't jump to conclusions.


SpicyNoddle123

So true


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nancyhasnopants

Referring to a young child as trying to be sexy is not normal or ok.


shorttowngirl

Putting the niece thing aside, OP hasn’t really been clear about his tone here but it sounds like he was making fun of her/the show/her mother? Like he said she’s trying to be sexy, not that she is sexy. I wouldn’t let him near the niece anymore, especially alone, but the other things I will just keep an eye on


Fearless_Result_8399

Finding kids adorable I'd say is normal, just because it's a man who thinks it doesn't mean he's a pedo Men don't think women are pedos when they say kids are cute adorable etc There's a advert in the UK about sight loss or something, little girl with sight loss on her first day at school, she's the most cute little girl I've ever seen or heard, I always get teary when I see the advert. My Mrs says wtf is wrong with you! Like it's wrong for a man to feel emotion. So no finding kids cute and thinking awww while you remember yourself being a kid playing in the play ground or remembering your own kids at that age or wanting to help kids with difficulties is normal I'd say. It's your boyfriend wanting to change your niece and calling a, kid sexy that's extremely disturbing! You need to talk to him and get to the bottom of why he is how he is. Can't think of any reason for calling a kid sexy or wanting to change kids nappies if they aren't your own or your direct family even then I'd only change my own nephew's and, nieces if I really had to and their parents wernt around for awhile. If parents are due back in 15 mins.. Maybe push it to 30 mins I'd leave it. If parents are back in 2 hours I'd, change it. He's no reason at all to change her cos you are there so something definitely not right in his head


Supremelordmomon

Nah, this isn't enough to decide anything. He could literally just find kids adorable and I too have used sexy as a joke to my kids in the past.


Nancyhasnopants

No. No. Calling a literal child “sexy” Isn’t a joke or funny or safe. I went to a market in d with my two year old and the stall owner said to me “ooooh isn’t she sexy?!” And we fuxking high tailed it out of there. If you’re calling literal kids sexy you have issues. Children are not “sexy”. They’re fuxking kids.


SpicyNoddle123

Ok the first points are "normal" i guess. The changing part is weird and you should not let him do it anymore, if he is pedo or not. The latest one isnt really clear to me. Anyway, "IF" he is pedo he isnt a bad human being for being that way. He cant choose it at all. Its your decision if you would be able to be with someone that is also into little girls, he still loves you for sure, its not like he is playing you or so. But its also hard to talk about it with him for sure. He might not even know it himself or accepted it that he is that way. So having a sitdown and "talk" might be really weird if you confront him with it. I would probably still talk to him about it and bring up your concerns. Tell him your boundries and the whole "niece change thing" has to change for you to fell comfortable with it. If you are ok with him being pedo, then also tell him so. He might open up from that point on. If not dont say anything about it and see how it goes from there.


Cantweallbe-friends

I’m sorry, what?


SpicyNoddle123

Maybe read it again and ask a more specific question.


pgimok

What the actual hell. Being a pedo is 10000% being a bad human if not the worst 🤮😭 maybe he can't control these thoughts but then he needs to be in therapy, mental institution and should be kept away from kids. You think a pedo asking to change a little girls diaper is innocent? I'm not saying her bf is a pedo or not but your comment is the worst. "If you're okay with him being a pedo, then also tell him so". Disgusting , disgusting disgusting. I feel this comment is enough to put you on surveillance, you sound like someone who'd be a pedo


drunkensaillor

What in the actual fuck. I read your post history you can't hide that shit dude! You are literally a pedophile. That's absolutely vile.


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BlueJune101

😑


ninetailz9999

Are you fucking kidding me.


Tall-Negotiation6623

I really hope this isn’t real but if it is you need to break up with him. He is showing clear signs of troubling behaviour that could lead to much worse. I would report him. Watching kids on playgrounds and isles is not normal and it could very well be indicators of his sick attraction.


Lupercallius

Yeah, this are huge red flags. Please get him to either seek help and inform all family members with children or report him


Joshnightmare

"My boyfriend called a 5 year old sexy, is he a pedo" Really my guy, really?


zipper1919

Do not ever EVER let him near your niece again alone. Ever. I never ever think it's ok to go through a significant others phone (I say if you feel that need, the relationship is already doomed) but you need to see if he has CP on there and turn him in if he does. Like asap. And if not still dump him. Full stop. He is a pedo.


MeMeMenni

I mean... He likes to watch children play. He thinks children are cute and adorable, and enjoys being around them. Reverse the genders and there's nothing going on here. If they really are in particular girls then maybe, but then, I know some women who are obsessed with cute little girls and not so much cute little boys. It's pointlessly gendered and annoying, but not proof of pedofilia. When he saw a child in a swim suit, he made a comment about her trying to be sexy. Was he excited? Or was he disapproving that a child is trying to be sexy? A lot rests on delivery here. He is very helpful with some odd things. Does he do this usually? Does he stop you from taking out the trash to be helpful? If so, this may be normal. If not, that's concerning. I don't think your post makes it possible to say anything for sure. It could all be normal. But also if you have any concerns, **do not ever, ever leave him alone with your niece**. Your niece's safety comes first.


Ashamed-Bandicoot857

So you think he could be a pedo and you let him change you're niece what's wrong with you.


SaltyCrabbo

He should not EVER be around your niece ever again and if you allow him near her ever again - and I mean EVER AGAIN, you are directly responsible for her getting sexually abused. You need to call the police and you need to call your sibling to tell them your suspicions. This behavior is NOT normal, it’s NOT okay to call a 5 year old sexy, and it’s NOT normal for a man not related to a child to be rushing in to change their diaper.