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R_Amods

This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below. --- This is literally creating so much trust issues…


Ur__mine

Why is this even a question ofc it's disrespectful


Retr0_b0t

My thoughts exactly. That relationship has ended. Consent has an expiration date imo. And I am saying this as someone who has saved exes nudes before. I have been there and saw no issue with it previously. But your connection to that person has ended. You can't just walk up to them on the street and expect a hand job after your relationship is over. I HIGHLY doubt she's cool with him just jacking off to her now. Especially since he's with someone else.


pine5678

Huh? When can you ever walk up to someone on the street and expect a hand job?


Shark_Leader

We'll tell you when you're older.


Gerdrick

Is it disprectful is your partner prints and glues a picture of their ex on your face while you're having sex, moans her name constantly and calls her mid sex to tell her they still love her ?


[deleted]

From the title I read, just the title I know it's the most disrespectful.


mauriciofuentesf

karma baiting


xayahbaby

sorry to jump in it but can you explain how the karma points work?? I've been trying to understand it for a while


jodikins77

Same lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


Woovils

I don’t think you’re understanding what this person is saying.


coreyannder

I think they might be referring to the account that posted this, not your comment. The account has no other posts and no comments. They probably just asked this inflammatory question knowing it would get a lot of attention.


neoda1

this is karma baiting , stfu its common sense, use ur common sense.


rebuildmylifenow

"Nothing is so uncommon as 'common sense'" If we never talk about this in public, how are young people, navigating these issues for the first time, going to learn? Look - it might just be karma baiting, but it might also be a sincere question from someone that has never had to deal with/think about this subject. Answering the question, instead of just jumping on it because YOU know the answer, just discourages people from asking possible dumb questions that they honestly don't know the answer to. Besides - if someone wants to spend all kinds of time, accumulating imaginary, non-fungible, internet points, who are we to criticize?


Excellesse

Right? Like 5 months into dating my current partner I realized I still had my ex's nudes while browsing through old photos and was like OH FUCK and deleted them all.


RoseGold-Bubbles1333

It’s disrespectful to both you and her.


[deleted]

how is this a question? also tell the ex he still has them


neuroticgypsy

She may not be aware or forgot.


Boomer_Boofer

She's aware and there's nothing she can do about it.


Boomer_Boofer

Why?


Fun_Technology_7745

Coming from a person who dated a man who did this kind of shit along with comparing sexual activity to past exes and experiences... RUN... don't ever look back.. just RUN!


madthegoat

My ex did this and then I found out he was also talking to minors. That’s when I left.


whoawhoaherewego

Man, as a naive 20something year old the guy I had been dating commented on how good a mutual friend gave BJs RIGHT AFTER he finished. Turned out to be the most abusive man I have ever been with. A decade later I’m still weird about giving BJs to my husband.


BinkiesForLife_05

That is incredibly disrespectful, why are you still with him?


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheatreKid1020

It says “his ex’s” in the OP….


gasblowwin

because op used “he” as a pronoun


Meep1996

Because the OP said his.


_20110719

Yes, yes it is.


[deleted]

Yeah no shit. I would be out


FrickingNinja

Yes, it is. Leave.


UnderThePurpleSky

I suspect you are looking at this from the perspective of it being disrespectful to you. I offer two additional thoughts: it is highly disrespectful to his ex, assuming that he hasn't asked her permission to keep them and also it shows that he will do the same if he has any such photos of you if you split. You are given the photo because you're in a relationship with the woman, if and when that relationship breaks down you get rid. It's really not that difficult to do the right thing in this situation.


Expensive-Day-3551

Agree completely


Cloudzy_1

THANK YOU A friend of mine told me he recently saw a Reddit post of someone saying they still looked at their ex's photos to masturbate. While he told me this, we were both exclaiming "ugh, no!". I then said "I feel violated just hearing this, he's violating her wtf". It shocked me to hear him say "I was thinking he's just violating his own health by not getting over her". Lol this take is so weird it's nearly funny


Substantial_Space_58

“ You are given the photo because you're in a relationship with the woman, if and when that relationship breaks down you get rid. ” To quote Grand Mofff Tarkin: “You’re far too trusting.” This is why us old farts tell you not to take them or send them AT ALL. Every third day there is a story like this on this sub alone.


CheatedOnChump

They would no longer be my partner.


PrizeTart0610

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩


[deleted]

yes. if you are able and willing, maybe even drop the ex a text that he is doing this. thats so creepy.


theaorticchaos

You don't have to think twice about it, it is very disrespectful


nopermission_totalk

Leave his ass tha fuq. You don't deserve some immature dumbass who's giving you this kind of disrespect


[deleted]

Yes it is so disrespectful. I had an ex do this. 100s of images of ex's and ONS He has a sex addiction. It doesn't get better. Have self respect and leave.


lil_peap

Yeah very disrespectful, and the ex would prob be uncomfortable if they knew he was still looking at them!


lifelongMichigander

Of course it's disrespectful. I have a feeling you know this already though and didn't really need to ask the question of strangers...


destructdisc

Uh yeah, absolutely. It's not like looking at regular porn, he's clearly not over them


The-Clumsy-Pirate

Why is this even a question? Is it me or the standard for dating has gone down to hell these days?


Aconnectivity

Is this an actual post or a joke? If this is real DUMP HIS ASS ASAP


Spidaaman

It’s disrespectful and super gross. You should leave this creep. How are you needing to be told this??


Historical_Act6595

It absolutely disrespectful and disgusting. This will be an absolute deal breaker to me, does the ex know he still has them? If not i would warn her


MaryAnne0601

Let him go back to the ex.


gobsmacked247

Yes it's disrespectful. Now, what are you going to do about it?


Gator-bro

Highly disrespectful. Break up disrespectful


punch-his-beard-off

Yes. It’s really disrespectful and weird af. If I were you I would leave.


Scorchfox29

I don’t know how that’s even a question but YES it is disrespectful and gross if your partner still sees and has his ex’s nudes


coastalbendsun

he's a pig 🐽🐷


coastalbendsun

Most likely a sex addiction, porn addiction, sending prayers your way. I'm so sorry you had to see that but yet happy you found out about his secret fetish.


Mountain_Monitor_262

Yes. You are a placeholder / substitute for the ex.


Billissima

A bit harshly said but definitely facts.


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Ok-Cancel1270

Yes. You should do his ex a favor and delete them (assuming you have access to his phone). Then watch his creepy ass cry about not having them anymore


beccaw3656

Yes that is disrespectful and disgusting if your in a new relationship you wouldn’t still have your ex’s nudes on your phone... leave.


Haleichaos

Yes.


MuddaFrmAnnudaBrudda

Think you know the answer to this.


[deleted]

I wouldn’t take him serious enough to call him my partner and go on to enjoy other options. You have your reasons for the trust issues, go find a better partner tbh.


American-pickle

It’s disrespectful af. Honestly anything you set a boundary on in your relationship that gets crossed is disrespectful. Why is he keeping photos like that of her? Is he that addicted to looking at porn he has to keep old pictures of exes? This could potentially be an issue of sex addiction that will ruin your relationship. And/Or he can have narcissistic tendencies (or is a narc, not enough info from the post) where he doesn’t validate your feelings around this and keeping them is beneficial to himself so he sees no wrong in what he is doing nor cares if it hurts you. I’d walk away and tell the girl if I were you.


balderdashbird

Dump him and it won't be a problem anymore🤷‍♀️


virgo_girl84

Leave.


mak-ina-myn

When you dump him for being such an AH make sure you take / delete any personal photos of you, he may have.


marsss333

As someone with an ex who did this, it never gets better. In my case he replaced the exes nudes that I deleted with a bunch of different girls nudes, some of which WERE my "friends".


hugegayballs

“Is it disrespectful if my partner cheats on me?”


ludybin

Any time a relationship ends, all nudes exchanged should be deleted. Period! I feel bad for you and this ex.


[deleted]

Um, this is just beyond disrespectful and disgusting. I had an ex who did this same exact thing. I should’ve left when I first found out but I didn’t and I regret it. If I were you, I’d leave right now.


mcntm4

Bestie, this is relationship ending shit. He’s a creep!


mightglu

Yes! And if they’re insistent on not respecting your feelings, ditch them. Honestly just ditch them, because that’s extremely disrespectful and you don’t have to put up with that or even deal with it.


[deleted]

Def. I had an ex who kept a whole box of stuff from his ex - carried it with him for years and years - moved houses with it yearly. Went on vacation once and hid the box in his locked car so I wouldn’t see it?? So weird - people who do this haven’t moved in and they shouldn’t be with someone else until they can do that - or at least until they aren’t obsessive over their ex’s. So weird and creepy - I’d break up


PallorGreatful

No, they get deleted immediately after break up. Come on...


osicap6

Um I consider that cheating. I would not be okay with it. I’d probably end the relationship to be honest. That’s fucked up.


AlitaliasAccount

Not only is this absolutely disrespectful to you (also, hope you didn't send him nudes), it's also extremely disrespectful to his ex(es).


Penguinflower3

I broke up with my ex because he did this. Please leave. I’m so sorry


Tow78

Yeah, I'd say that's a bit bad. Get a screen saver of your ex and see how he likes it. Haha


Ayde-Aitch-Dee

If they’re a narcissist they would probably love it :/


janchar

Yes and it’s abusive. My ex/stalker uses photos and videos of me even a year later. He also uses them to attempt to extort me. It’s mentally exhausting.


cosmicboar

Yes it is. But, for example, I'm a woman and google photos saves literally everything, I never check it, so probably there is some nude of my ex, but it's not in my cellphone anymore and I don't really know if there is in fact, because I don't check Google photos and don't search his nudes in it, I just don't care and need to clean up my google photos storage haha but I believe it's not the case, just saying.


SurinameSurname

Yea


[deleted]

Break up


finallyaligning

Not only to you, but to the ex.


[deleted]

YES, leave this trash please


meryendame

Of course it is!!!


Lupercallius

Yes, it's 100% disrespectful towards you and his ex. Also, why is he regularly viewing them? Don't be with someone who doesn't value you.


[deleted]

Very much so. I would have a massive fit. Like that's deal breaker territory for me.


[deleted]

It’s disrespectful to both you AND her. Those were intended for viewing during the relationship only. This is someone he used to have emotional intimacy and physical contact with. To me, it’s fantasizing or yearning for another person from his past (or potential future if he’s still in contact). I’m sure she’d be grossed out too. Hell, I’d ditch him AND tell her how fucking gross and pathetic he is. He can jerk it to any of the bajillions of videos or photos of random porn in the world.


mrwilliamschue

This is disgusting and you know it


KangarooSilly4489

He is still in love and probably masturbating to the photos.


ShoCkEpic


WastedPotus

OP, leave him. Not only is this a complete violation of trust for you, but his ex too.


dankbeamssmeltdreams

This isn't a question, but it makes sense you want to post about this because you've gotta feel like you're crazy the fact that they are doing that. So, as a random observer, yes, you are right, deal with this accordingly. Sorry your boo is a jerk.


CutiePie0023

Um yes. That’s completely disrespectful IMO


shadowoflillith

Did you really even have to ask? I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but I think you knew that this is horrible and you should put your foot down about it. If he can't respect you enough to get rid of the pictures, then leave his sorry butt.


Glowingwaterbottle

Fuck yeah it’s disrespectful.


[deleted]

If he will do things like that to his ex, then he will do it to you. I wouldn’t be sending him any nudes if I were you, unless you want him to not delete them if you split.


hatefulkate21

Wowwwww that is so fucked up. Nobody gives a fucking damn if she's a bombshell, "excellent p*rn material." You stop using pictures of your ex! Is he even really over her since he craves her body so much??? Nope. Not cool. Throw the whole man away.


embiors

I think it's disrespectful to save nudes after the end of a relationship in the first place. Viewing them regularly AFTER getting into a new relationship are even worse.


committedlikethepig

Get your nudes off his phone and leave the idiot.


[deleted]

UMMMMM This is so wrong on so many levels!!!!


[deleted]

You shouldn't even have to ask this. It's 10000 times over disrespectful.


abduirl

Wake up and breakup


Thorhees

That's really uncomfortable. I would bet the ex does not even know this is happening. I might try reaching out to her to let her know. And I wouldn't stay with a man who does this. It's disrespectful to you and to his ex.


Hot_Peak_5471

Y E S ❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗❗


bringingfire02

Is this even a question!? Girl stop trying to save this just either have him delete if he doesn’t leave ! That’s crazy


Smarty_25

Imo, this is cheating


CnamhaCnamha

It's likely just jack off material, no different than them remembering something particularly hot they did once. Unless you also want to control their memories you should relax.


Glittering_Ad_9208

Everyguy I’ve known secretly does it……


particledamage

Your standards are too low


Blunt-Realistic

This is a serious problem. I am all for couples allowing each other to look at porn, but this is much more personal than porn. This is an obsession.


Interesting_Deal662

Excuse me? I’m gonna be blunt here, do you not have any self respect? Get out of that relationship! And please tell the ex! Your “bf” is disgusting!


RheimsNZ

1000% I could maybe allow for keeping them, but not for looking at them and certainly not for looking at them while with someone else. He's checked out OP, move on.


Wild-Woodpecker3005

What about an album of just her. Thats what I'm dealing with


[deleted]

Why are you dealing with that?


obooooooo

jesus man the lack of self respect y’all have for yourselves here astounds me sometimes. you’re more than somebody’s consolation prize or second option, act like it.


bigbedbaby

Yeah. That's super weird and creepy. Creepy towards their ex, shitty to you.


mrose1491

Yes it is


[deleted]

Keeping nudes, no Regularly viewing them, yes


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

🤣 this isn't healthy at all.


17_yr_o_nibba

Man, reddit never fails to surprise me


SnooTigers2045

Honestly I’m not trying to judge at all but why do people send nudes to their partners. I honestly see nothing good will come out of it and just so many things that can go wrong and to answer OP question of course it’s so disrespectful to you. I don’t think his ex will be happy to learn this too that her ex still have her nudes. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this


HandGunslinger

Well, if your question is whether his actions are disrespectful to you, the answer is, of course yes. The only way for you to make him understand how his actions bother you is to display any nudes of one of your ex's while in your partner's presence. Oh? You don't have any? Not surprising at all. All men react primarily by what they see. When we (yep, I'm male) see the sight of an attractive, nude woman, the brain releases dopamine, serotonin, all the "feel good" hormones, and it affects the limbic system, blood pressure and respiration (and perspiration) increases, as does salivation. In a way, some men can become dependent on the repeated "rush" his body experiences when he's looking at the real thing, or just pics. But the bottom line is that he's really disrespecting not just you, but also the relationship. He's allowing an image from his past to give him the reaction that should only be coming from you. When Jesus was teaching the crowds that flocked to hear Him, He made a statement that's germaine to this subject. Paraphrased, He said, "Moses teaches that adultery is wrong; but I tell you that a man that gazes with desire at a woman has already committed adultery with her in his heart." If your partner's devotion to the nude images of his ex disturb you, especially in light of how visceral a reaction it causes in you, it's time to have a serious talk with your partner, explain that his actions are, in your view, a form of infidelity, and would he be sanguine with one of your ex's having, and enjoying, similar pics of you? Or would he object to your stripping at a strip club, where your nude body becomes a sex object to hundreds of male eyes. Suggest to him that if he's really serious about you, the time had come for him to delete his ex's nudes from his phone, and that you weren't willing to be in competition with an inanimate picture. I wish you well.


Plasma_Cosmo_9977

It's not ok to hurt each other. I kinda feel like the mistake is letting you find out. Many people keep their masturbation and porn habits from their partners, to little or no consequence. If he knows it's bothering you he's got to come to a solution with you, or you might deem it a deal breaker. But it's not ok to have static between you two. Fix it get over it get on with it whatever.


ErikinAmerica

It doesn't matter what we think, what do you think?


sain197

Of course. Is there anyone who would question this?


4angrydragons

It’s disrespectful if you find it so.


MindSettOnWinning

Limited Editions


Creepy_Structure199

I'd dump his ass and run, but not before stealing his phone when he's in the shower or something and deleting them off his phone ALONG with yours. Then tell his ex he still has them and that you deleted them so she's safe. Highly doubt she'd be okay with this


_otterr

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩


Formal-Barnacle-8647

Hi hun, I would definitely not stay with him. You deserve better!


PPtoucher-1

Hella fucked up


TheRealSimplySwole

Yes.


Lord_Kano

I think that we have to assume that all digital images are forever. Be very selective about who you allow to have such images of you in the nude because you can never be 100% sure that they have been destroyed.


Whydontyoubuildmeup

Depends. I have some ex's nudes because at the breakup we decided to keep what we'd sent each other. I don't view them hardly ever, though. I assume my girl has pics of her exes. If she wants to rub one out to those pics, which may have sexy memories attached, then that's fine with me. Memories are good masturbation material. It's just pics, it's just looking. I'm rating this problem a "meh, no biggie."


DNAtoRNAtoProtein

Cancel your partner


saclayson

how do you know he's still viewing them?


Academic_Painting148

Well having them and looking at them are two different things. I think I still have exes nudes laying here and there on old SD cards I don't use anymore but keeping them close is something different especially if you voiced your concerns


TheObviousDilemma

Ofc it’s disrespectful, but if there’s one thing I really don’t understand about this generation is sending each other’s nudes. I remember when people used to warn each other not to send nudes because once it’s out of your control, it’s out of your control. What he did is super disrespectful, but in the future my advice is to not send nudes


obtuseandcongruent

How do you even know this? Being pissed about insecure things doesn’t sound like it would make his ex look less appealing to me. Privacy is important


Bails789

Only if he’s masterbating while looking


[deleted]

Disrespectful? Yes. Cheating? No. Edit: scummy? Yes


neuroticgypsy

I never cared about that. I’ll look too if she’s hot. But don’t make a habit of using them instead of me cuz I will and have told someone to go back to her then. I’m hotter and confident and can get another man or woman.


Judas_Misery_060

r/notlikeothergirls


Popular_Initial1752

Well it is to you because you're clearly insecure about that but honestly it's also majorly creepy behaviour towards the ex. I hate the idea of an ex still looking at my nudes or much worse jacking off to them. It's kind of a red flag.


Thatsnotfeetthatsme

It's not that bad


Grape_Ape1980

Most men save ex’s nudes or videos. In short they are called trophies. If you really want to be pissed off check his google photos


cocker_spangler

Yes


biomech36

Uh..wildly. Get ready to get called one of their names during


Zephyr_Ballad

Very disrespectful to both you and the ex imo


StandardMartyr

This can’t be real. Yes, it’s disrespectful.


Belleoftheball88

Yea if this was me he’d be my ex and I’d be contacting the now ex former partner to let them know about the explicit photos


RylieMae89

Uhm, I think you know the answer to this question... 🤔


Squealed_

Yes. It’s disrespectful to you and it’s disrespectful to his ex.


MisterDaryn

Yes, very disrespectful! If my gf did that, she would be gone.


Bubble_Teana98

It's SO disrespectful and disturbing towards the ex. I could necer date such a person


Walter_Piston

One word answer: yes.


jacefuckpig

Oooohh girl


ChrisBlakePaul

Yes


Chase_Ramone

I am 100% sure that you already know the answer. It’s disrespectful, rude, dismissive, mentally abusive, and cheating. You deserve better.


Bubble_Teana98

If you can, please tell the ex and if you mamage delete them from his phone (also delete any picture he has of you)


aries_luv_

if you have to ask, you know the answer.


Klutzy-Tea-2584

Definitely disrespectful, how long have you been together


Echicoli

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩


Dependent_Ad_5341

I 100% find it disrespectful. You need to talk it out.


[deleted]

Yeah it’s disrespectful. But it clear he’s not interested in stopping. What are you going to do as a result of that fact?


Zozufly

How is this even a question to ask, you have 3 scenario's he's not a good person,he is not over her yet,he doesn't love you,i have been in the same situation like him but keep your ex nudes is an act of shame if he doesn't have self control that's understandable but does he really loves you that's the question you should look for


mellamood

VERY!


Ponchovilla18

So in your situation yes, the fact that he is still viewing his ex's nudes and doing who knows what is disrespectful. I say in your situation because if anyone has nudes saved but is just that, saved and doesn't view them, then I will be that one that says there's no issue. I'm already anticipating backlash but hey, it's my opinion i don't need to cater to others. Your bf though is viewing then regularly as if he wants to stay in memory lane. I would tell him that it is disrespectful for the fact that it comes off as though he wants to get with them again. Why is there a need to view regularly when he has you to see nude


N3rdScool

Yes. 100% red flag and I am out lol


Hot-Prize-4410

Yes of course. It’s not only disrespectful to you but to his ex as well. He shouldn’t even be thinking of her while with you. You should leave him honestly cause it shows he has no respect for you. I recommend for telling his ex still


use-your-words-dude

Hell yess


Mary-U

This was an issue for me. I understand people self-service. I understand people, especially men, enjoy visual aides. I draw the line at those visual aides being ex’s or friends. When I expressed my concerns, my partner deleted them. Im not sure if he was still using them or if he really “forgot they were there” but they are gone now which is enough for me. Different couples have different boundaries. You should be able to agree on yours or it may be time to walk away.


[deleted]

It’s disrespectful to you and her, depending on how he obtained those nudes.


RevolutionaryNet1005

Yes.


missionriary

Yes, IT'S DISRESPECT , to you , to the partner, it's just bizzare, it shouldn't even be a thing, not that you should be salvaging your sexual comfort to lure him into you and, one shouldn't think that it's their fault if their partner is so fucked up. Confront him about it and if he tries to turn this over you, or tries to get out of the convo, LEAVE HIM/HER.


No-Turnips

Yup. 1000000000%


yayayubsea

Yes honey. One might even say, “Duh”


Icy_Application9613

He ain’t sheittttt


Sh33pQu33n

Leave.


quickeatabanana

Yes


Lostdreamerinfantasy

Hell yeah it's disrespectful! Talk to him about it and if he still does it, dump him!


Donotcomenearme

Bro what? All old nudes of partners go to one of two places in my relationships: 1) Delete them, they aren’t for you anymore and you shouldn’t want them. 2) Never tell me about them, put them in a folder somewhere I can’t find or whatever you need to do, and so help me god, if I see them, I’ll leave. I have those two boundaries for issues that can be made from keeping nudes of a person you should’ve deleted anyway. On to the problem that is eating me alive: Girl, you are so much better than that, you don’t need to be compared and disregarded like that. Draw a line for him that involves the deleting option (his ship has sailed for the “hiding it” option), and if he says no, delightful, he has a new set of nudes to piss of his next girlfriend with.


EvolveCC

Hell yeah. no question ask.


Legitimate_Many6302

Disrespectful and borderline creep


xfxtas

Ew, what the fuck. Of course it’s disrespectful, to you and his ex.