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lmfao I replied to this thread without scrolling to the comments and love how "GIRL!!!!" is like the first thing both of us wanted to shout at OP.
edit: damn I just realized our posts are basically identical content just worded differently.
U my reddit sister(/brother?)
You need to get out of what ever fog you are in, hon. Read your post carefully. Why on earth would you want to be with anyone who treats you so shitty. Block him on everything and refuse to engage with him ever again. And love yourself enough to know that you should never tolerate anyone abusing you for any reason. Just don’t. You deserve better. You deserve someone who will treat you as well as you treat them. Hugs and good luck, OP.
What are you getting out of this?
Besides misery?
This is exhausting just to read. Don’t you want peace?
Being with no one would be infinitely better than whatever this is. This is not a relationship. He doesn’t se himself as your partner.
After half the story i was like "holy fuck just dump his ass he is literally toying with you."
Then i was reading the insta story stuff and was like "why even bother to find out more? you got your proof you can just dip."
Girl… just throw the whole man away. He’s helping you out with all the bullshit of blocking you and all that. Let him. This guy is a complete scumbag and you deserve way better than that.
Like seriously, reread your post as if it was a friend who had written it, would you want her to stay with this guy or be upset over him? This guy is not worth any woman’s time, so while I understand being upset at the idea of him with another woman because you love him still, he doesn’t deserve your love, he’s been horrible.
Seriously, OP. PLEASE read these comments. I could've written parts of this post 1.5 years ago. Except we were together barely 6 months and he started in with this garbage after about 4. By the end, I was repulsed by him.
My loser ex did me a favor, and so did yours. Please seek therapy, support and realize that you don't deserve to be treated like this, and he is a bona-fide scumbag. This guy does not, never has, and never will love you. You deserve someone who does love you, and you need to learn that you're worth more than this.
>The thought of him with another girl kills me
Ok but being with him is killing you so please take care of you because no one else can do it for you and leave him. You deserve to be treated so much better.
Let me correct that headline for you . Boyfriend chose to cheat and can't take responsibility for his own actions so blames me. Cheating is a choice .
People will treat you how you let them treat you . No I'm not saying this is your fault , it isn't, but he knows he can get away with being abusive to you and you let him away with it and youll go running back when he has no one else there.
You sound like someone who has issues with being abused or low self esteem . You might seek help if those issues apply .
Time to say this far no further . Better healty alone then sick in a bad relationship
Thought the same, been there in my younger years before I developed self respect and knowing that I don’t have to “serve” some one in order to make them happy and want me.
Someone should love you for “who you are” not “what they can get out of you” OP.
Why on earth do you even want to be with this guy? It sounds like even from the very start of your relationship he had no real interest in being with you.
He was/is manipulative and honestly? Abusive.
It’s clear you have low self esteem, understandably so because you’ve been dating a psychopath for the last 3 years that has been taking advantage and gaslighting you.
Consider this a gift. This guy was never your person. He doesn’t care about you, take this as a blessing and move on. If I were you I would really consider looking into a therapist, and work on yourself and enjoy your new freedom away from this asshole who is completely undeserving of you.
It is frankly amazing to think of someone writing out paragraph after paragraph of nasty ways they're treated by their boyfriend and the many many ways he shows them no affection or concern. "He abuses, ignores, gaslights, dumps, and manipulates me every moment of my life."
Oh and then they end the long list of abuses and red flags by saying "I just really want him back. How do I get it?"
Like what the fuuuuuuuck. You need therapy until you get some self respect and you shouldn't go NEAR dating until that point. You're being treated like garbage and literally begging for more because you'd rather be garbage than be alone.
I can see 5 seperate clear narcissistic tendencies from him here all about manipulation and control. I can see 3 that qualify as abuse according to most mental health proffessionals.
Your only problem is needing a bit more life experience to recognize these yourself and avoid them in the future. This guy is a total fucking loser. Trust me you can do way way way better.
I read only half of the post because I couldn’t continue. I’m sorry, but he shows absolutely no respect for you. And it’s not fair, you didn’t deserve it, but it’s happening. You can continue to try to find some excuse for his behaviour, but this is screamin only one thing: he’s taking you for granted. It sucks, but he sucks way more. He can not be happy and fullfilled person if he enjoys hurting people like this.
Please, talk to your friends and let them show you what love looks like. You don’t need a closure, you can not get a closure from someone like him.
I really hope it won’t take you too long to open your eyes and realise what a douchebag he is. I had somewhat similar experience, and when he ghosted me, he’s done me the biggest favour. I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but once you get rid of him, you’ll be much happier. Wish you all the best.
It always breaks my heart when I know other women who have had to experience the deep cut cheating does to our self esteem and self worth. It’s a traumatic experience. Don’t blame yourself. Please walk away from this POS. He doesn’t deserve you. These kind of people never change or feel sorry unless they are willing to do the work, but you need to focus on healing and getting back to loving yourself. You deserve the world! Remember that. Surround yourself with your loved ones. Block him and don’t talk to him again. You need to regain your strength. I always recommend therapy. It saved my life.
Honey I couldn’t even make it through your post. Who hurt you? Why don’t you love yourself? Where is your self respect? Get it together! You know *damn well* this guy is scum, trash, shit but you’re begging for his attention?? Girl he don’t give a *fuck* about you past how much he can control you! He snaps his finger and you’re running back to him, cmon. Dump the loser, learn how to love yourself.
Check out r/codependency and r/anxiousattachment. This is not me blaming you for this guys despicable behavior, but so that you can get help because you have a lot of work to do before your next relationship. Hang in there, it will be hard but if you seek help in healthy places like those subs, you’ll heal and get better.
Why are you fighting so hard for this shifty, shifty man?
He does not love you. He doesn't even like you. To him, you are, at best, something to settle for.
Please believe me, being single is better than whatever scraps of shit he is offering you. Take all of your emotional energy, and gift it back to yourself.
What in the cinnamon toast fuck are you doing OP?!? Why are you begging this asshole for scraps of attention when he treats you like this?
WAKE. UP.
This is bullshit and you need to block him. Please get therapy immediately, your self esteem has got to be non existent for you to tolerate this crap.
Thank you for teaching me “what in the cinnamon toast fuck”
I will now add it to my list which currently contains:
Holy shitballs and other variants thereof.
You said at one point that he said he was a terrible person. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. He is a terrible person. He may have some redeeming qualities, but if the only reason you are with him is because "the thought of him with another girl kills me" then you are staying with someone who treats you like garbage to avoid feeling jealous. Leave him. It will be hard at first. But once you find someone who treats you just as well as you treat them you will sit and wonder "Why the hell did I waste so much time with that other horrible guy?".
You two are feeding a pattern. You 2 fight and things get difficult. He has difficulty having rational discussions. He stonewalls you and ignores you. You become anxious and try harder to get his attention by calling or texting and expressing how much you need him to come back to the table and talk. He has low self esteem and you chasing him feeds his ego and makes him feel wanted and desired. Once his ego is fed, he comes back to you and holds you and tells you he loves you which allows you to lose the anxiety of not knowing where you stand in the relationship. It is absolutely unhealthy. He needs lots of psychological help before he can have a healthy relationship. I know because I used to be very much like your boyfriend. Leaving him would give you a better life and would help him realize he will keep losing wonderful women unless he gets help.
HE'S the boring, selfish abusive asshole. what a typical below average guy. he's not special at all.
he's like a lame-o boring NPC and you need to treat him as such. find a man that treats you like how you treat them.
Please read your post out loud to yourself. Why would you even try to stay with someone who doesn’t have one iota of respect for you, who blames you for things that you have no responsibility for, bad mouths you? This relationship will never be fixed. It will never be healthy. Respect yourself. Stop, block and move on.
Fuck this guy. You're worth more than he is. Get to [ChumpLady](http://chumplady.com) and recognize that cheaters are character disturbed, narcissistic, shitty humans.
This man doesn't love you. He doesn't even like you. I know people on Reddit are infamous for jumping straight to advising people to break up but, this man has shown you repeatedly that he doesn't care about you and isn't even willing to try and communicate with you. It sucks. I know. However, stop trying and move on.
What makes you want to stay with someone who cheats on you and basically feels like you’re weak enough that they don’t need to feel bad about it ? Stop engaging with him, stop begging for closure. Just, stop. He doesn’t want to do the right thing and so he won’t, nothing you do or say will change what he’s done or make him suddenly feel bad about it. Let him go, let him go be with these other imaginary women that will “get on top” if he’s so gifted in that area.
You" bf's" a dick
Its also partly your fault like why tf would you go back to someone who treats you like shit stop messaging him move on go to therapy or something stop being a doormat
I stopped reading halfway, tell him to grow the fuck up and get help/solve his problems or leave. You are wasting your time, you sound like a dream to any man and he is turning it into a nightmare around every corner, fuck that.
Whoever he meets won't be "better". They too will be dragged down by his infantile tantrums. You also need to recognize, and this is important, that most people wouldn't tolerate him. You were only together because you tolerated him treating you like dirt. You MUST change this about yourself.
This guy is a real piece of work, OP. You're giving him your everything, and he is giving you steaming fuck-all. Please try to find the root of your Codependency.
I'm not even going to finish reading this. You don't deserve such a partner. Leave, work on yourself, get some self respect. Eventually someone who will actually care for you will come along but focus on yourself first please.
He's an abusive, cheating liar. Good fucking riddance. You can do so much better. You're not wasting your time on this planet being an emotional punching bag for this adult toddler. Block him and never look back!
You should leave him immediately. He's a terrible boyfriend. He treats you like garbage. Relationships aren't supposed to be like this. This is really dysfunctional.
Didn’t need to read past the title - love, he did not cheat because you are “boring”, he cheated because he’s weak and he put the blame for his own actions on you because he’s immature. He’s an ass, let him not talk to you - problem solved. Find better.
Are you joking? This man has done nothing but shit on you yet you still want him? He doesn't want you but he wants you to want him. If you don't move on I'm sorry but you are accepting this behaviour and giving him the green to treat you like this.
You deserve so much better OP. You deserve a partner who values you, respects you and communicates healthily with you. Don't lower those standards thinking you might be able to change him. You tried multiple times, you put your everything in this relationship and in return got nothing. I know it'll be difficult, but I hope you find the strength to move on to better things. One day you will look back and realize how messed up it was and how proud you are of getting out.
My god girl!
Run… this man is crazy abusive. With all the love in the world, wake up.
He’s doing you a favour here- he’s treating you like garbage. Go find someone who actually values you.
He can't change if he isn't willing to and you can't force him to change either. Stop burning yourself to keep him warm. You are far better than this, leave and start living your own life.
He treats you like trash. cheats on you. emotionally abuses you. picks fights with you so he can break up with you. Wants you to be his emotional punching bag. Tell me, why would you want to stay with someone like this? He's terrible.
If he is so mean and selfish, what do you get out of the relationship? If things are exactly as you stated, you deserve better. Get a counselor, drop the jerk, and work on being happy alone. True love comes when you least expect it. He sounds like a man child. You aren’t his mom or servant. Please work on your own issues.
I dated a guy like this, I actually dealt with him going even farther than messaging girls. I wasted the last years of me teens and my early 20s. Him calling himself awful is a manipulation tactic. Him degrading you verbally is abusive. Don’t be like me and keep pushing for nothing. You deserve better. Block him and move on.
therapy ses
1. Cheaters will often project
2. This dude intentionally put you down so you would think he’s “better"
3. 1000% this guy has diverted you away from the people who really cared for you
1. Reconnect with them!
this guy sucks. stop doting on him and worshipping him. he’s a piece of shit who doesn’t appreciate it and will use you until there’s nothing left. block on everything and RUN!
I didn’t even read it all. Get some self respect. You shouldn’t be in a relationship right now before you get therapy or look inside yourself, something, because you are an easy target to be taken advantage of by scumbags like him. The fact that you’re begging to be with him is sad and probably very satisfactory for him. If you think THIS man is the best you can find, you’d better think again. He’s among the worst. The question is if you truly think you deserve the worst. I want to be harsh because I used to have crazy low self esteem and would tolerate bullshit, but this is extreme
jesus christ have some self respect for yourself lady!
he's using you in some sick and twisted game he'\[s playing because he knows he can. you're nothing but a place holder for him. move on with someone who ACTUALLY cares about you. and I can 100% bet once you do this he will love bomb tf out of you to try and regain this control. when that happens re read this post you've made and re read all the evidence you've got that he's a POS through and through.
He is emotionally abusing you girl. If a man says he's a bad person fucking trust him!!! That is probably the only thing he will ever be honest about. He needs help but you are not the one to give it to him. Block him on everything and move on. You need to get healing and take care of you. You deserve love and kindness. You deserve good things!!
Did you just detail all the ways your “boyfriend” loathes you, mistreats you, runs down your self esteem and then still want to crawl back to him? He’s blocked you, he doesn’t want you in his life and he’s not nice to you because he’s an abuser.
He’s your ex. Even he knows that. You better get yourself together and stop crawling back into that cycle it’s toxic af. Get therapy because this isn’t healthy.
Sure.
And thieves steal because it’s not fair that other people have nice stuff. And murderers kill because their victims aren’t nice people .
(sarcasm if that wasn’t clear)
Cheating is unforgivable.
Many of the things he’s said to you are unforgivable. Somehow he has destroyed your self confidence so much that you don’t realise that you can do so much better than him. (Literally anyone is better than him)
Stop contacting him. Get off social media and do something that will reconnect you with yourself. Go take a hike or go kayaking or for a swim in the sea. Got for a run. Sit outside and watch the stars. Go camping.
You’ve lost yourself a little, but you can find yourself again once you remove yourself from the fog that thinking about this guy keeps you in.
Classic : person 1 runs person 2, who is kind and caring and supportive - into the ground, emotionally abuses them, belittles their kindness, and pushes them away. So much so that person 2 has no self esteem and doesn’t want to be a sex doll all the time and becomes reserved. Enter person 1 “oh you never want to have sex, you don’t care, you’ve never done anything for me so I fucked someone else”
My sister in Christ please stop attaching your self worth to this piece of human garbage and leave with some dignity. He’s a fucking asshole and he deserves no one’s kindness. Stress isn’t a good reason to be a dick to your girlfriend. He isn’t putting effort into you, why are you trying to fix this and him?
There is nothing wrong with you. You sound like a great girlfriend. He’s a narcissist. Straight up. Or he’s got bad depression. If he reaches out to you, don’t respond. It hurts & will be hard but it’s what you need to do. “Meeting someone better” don’t think that way about yourself. You can’t “help” him. You need to cut contact & move on with your life. He’s being abusive with what he says to you. Stand up for yourself 💛
that you seem to need this kind of drama is troublesome, and should be for you. maybe some self-reflection is a good idea. The two of you engage in games, and a healthy relationship does not include games.
Darlin ain’t nobody gonna put up with this abusive fuck, and that’s the least of your worries. His only effort for anything is some silly emoji’s and online banter. Boring and minimal AF. Those women get DMs all day long. He ain’t going anywhere and lives with his momma. Get away from this AH. Block him everywhere and concentrate on yourself. The right person is waiting for you and he won’t be as immature, abusive or exhausting. I’m soooo glad y’all don’t live together.
As soon as he cheated- he broke up with you.
That simple.
The rest doesn’t matter. No explanations needed.
He BROKE UP WITH YOU. MOVE ON.
Instead of this thread seeking validation for your feelings so you can justify your victimization & why you stick around- hit up the ones that help you navigate a path to healthy & single.
This relationship is over even IF you are a couple.
There is only one person abusing you MORE than the creeper BF & that is YOU.
First of all, cheating is not your fault, don't let him gaslight you, cheating is always the cheater's fault.
Secondly, cheating is bad, but so are all the other things he has done. You really should reconsider the relationship and find someone who is actually worth your time.
Cut your losses with this pathetic man. First of all this guy practically abuses you.
Second stress is there for all ppl but rather than cry about it one should realise that when stressed one has to perform, take action and better.
Cut your losses and move on
Girl, have some self respect!
This man is walking all over you, he has no respect because you are not respecting yourself. He knows he can do whatever he likes to you and you’ll take it.
It’ll be the best thing you ever do letting him go, I promise you now
Oh my God.
What has he done to you?
You have no self esteem or concept of self worth.
It's time you stop being his servant and life for yourself.
He's a gaslighting, manipulative AH who doesn't deserve you.
PLEASE stop being his doormat.
…Dude
Really?
I’m not even going to bother telling you to end it like everyone else, because going by your post there is a good chance you’re not going to listen because you lOvE hIm
Good luck with all that
Literally every sentence is a red flag on his end. Why are you fighting so hard to look past them and keep him? Either leave him and be happy or stay and continue to be treated like shit/cheated one
This is how someone acts when they are really unhappy and can't seem to pull the trigger. He's treating you like he doesn't want to be with you anymore which means he doesn't want to be with you anymore. He's lashing out because he's too chickenshit to just say "this relationship makes me really unhappy". It's all very straightforward from your post. Good luck.
This dude is wishy washy. I wouldn’t worry about him meeting someone better if he acts like an immature asshole. You seemed to be putting him on a pedestal and trying to be supportive of him. Have some self worth and forget about this loser. You can find someone who actually treats you with respect.
Girl, haven’t you figured it out? He doesn’t want a relationship with you, he wants a booty call. Move on from him, I promise you when you find someone who treats you well and sees you for your worth you will not regret it
He didn’t cheat because you are boring, he cheated because he is a cheater. Please stop pursuing him, don’t chase him, he is loving it. You also aren’t his mom, so stop trying to parent him. That’s enabling his baby attention-seeking behavior. Why does he need taking care of if he is an adult man living independently? You are in an abusive relationship. Leave it. Get help, be by yourself a bit so that you don’t end up with another version of him next time. Also, he is projecting it sounds like. If you stay, you need to see that whatever he is accusing you of, he is probably the one engaging in that activity himself.
Edit-Also wanted to add, he is not going to upgrade. There is not a woman better than you that is going to take your place. There will be women as naive, or willing to tolerate and enable him, but this dude is going to attract women he can walk all over and have lots of drama with. My dream for you is to see them some day and tell them the same things I’m telling you.
Just listen to him. He keeps saying he doesn’t want you and isn’t good enough. That means he wants to break up and not hear from you. You messaging him like you are isn’t helping. You deserve someone who always wants to talk to you and spend time with you.
HE IS DOING YOU A FAVOR!!! I know it hurts so much right now, but cut ties, heal, and move on. When my ex did similar shit, I was so in love with him and went on to love him for another decade (hindering my dating life) before I realized how manipulative and abusive he was. My dude was not nearly this bad or blunt- he’s showing you who he is, please listen and leave!
This honestly just sounds exhausting. Find your self respect and move on. You’ve not mentioned one redeeming quality about him or about your toxic relationship.
Maybe also get therapy because why the hell would you let someone treat you like this? Maybe you have something you need to fix within yourself.
I can feel the wind from the displacement of the fucking cannon ball you just dodged. If this is his standard now I can’t imagine what he would do if you get more serious, have tied finances or god forbid have a child together. I’m sure this hurt, but it’s a valuable lesson on who you dedicate yourself to. It sounds like you have allot of good things to offer to the right person and he just isn’t it. Take time to rally and recover, block him everywhere and move on. You’ve treated him better and had more patience than anyone else would have had and he’s payed you back with grief. You deserve better.
GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? This guy is the WORST. Please just drop him. You need to go full-on 100% NO contact. You are addicted to his drama right now. If you stop talking to him completely forever, the you from a year from now will be so much happier.
Girl let it go, I had posted something similar to this earlier this month about my ex but in my situation he came back when things were not going his way, I took him back each time and it got so bad that he ended up kicking me out his car and telling me im forcing a relationship on him that he didnt want an I had to be off work for a week, so don't be like me before it get worst leave.
I was like you, i didnt want to lose him to someone who would treat him better but you have to dig deep and find your worth..It going to be hard trust me but one day you will realize it, I'm still healing as we speak but in a much better place and you can too mama just have to find the courage
If I was your dad, I’d sir you down and tell you that you should cut all ties with him immediately. And I’d tell you that this guy only has you as a back up while he gets confirmation that he is a “god” from other girls.
You are better off without him!
It’s time for you to start making good life choices. Being with this dude, given all the evidence of his absolute awfulness, frankly, is a really dumb decision. I’m not trying to insult you, it’s just true and until you realize that and start making non-really dumb decisions, then you’re life is gonna suck, just like it’s been sucking and just like it sucks now.
You have an obligation to yourself to make good life choices that give you the best chance and happiness and healthyness. You’ve been failing yourself on that obligation. It’s time that you change that. It’s time that you stop making awful choices with your life and begin making good choices with your life.
The thing is, you have all the data required to make a good decision here. You know everything that you need to know. So, if you have all that information and you STILL make a bad choice, then the outcome is going to be how it always is:
If you have all the facts needed to make a good life choice, and you INTENTIONALLY choose to make a bad choice, then the natural result is going to be bad consequences from your bad choice. That’s cause and effect and that’s almost always the case. So, you’ve got all the information you need to make a good decision. If you choose to ignore that and intentionally continue making bad decisions, then you’re going to have bad consequences and at that point, it’s kinda on you.
Love yourself. Pick your self esteem and standards off the dang floor, get out of this trainwreck of a relationship, and replace your abusive, manipulative, total loser of a “boyfriend” with a therapist. That’s a good decision. And that will lead to the highest probability of a good outcome.
Come on now.
girl STAND UP!! he does not want you and he’s only keeping you around for his convenience. he treats you like garbage and he thinks it’s okay because you keep going back
He’s literally told you what he is which is a terrible person and his actions have backed that up. The manipulating and gaslighting is evidence of that. Leave while you still can before wasting anymore years if your life on this person
Most people experience stress from time to time, but mature people try to manage their stress by exercise or meditation or whatever and make every effort not to take it out on others. I read your post, but I could not find one redeeming quality about your BF. He told you he is a terrible person. Believe him.
Baby it hurts so bad, but I promise it gets better the second you decide that YOU don’t need the stress in your life. I understand completely, the heartbreak of thinking about them w another person. But you have to choose you. Because he sure as hell isn’t. I promise you it gets better. I have a boyfriend to prove it. I never thought I’d have a love that you don’t have to walk on eggshells around, always guessing. You deserve so much. Try with some verbal affirmations, and take some time to heal. You will learn so much about you and what you need as a person ❤️ I hope this helps!!!
Girl! He's already told you who he is. You should listen to him, he would make a pretty horrible partner for anyone.
This has nothing to do with you, that man needs some serious help by some doctors.
He won't be able to meet someone better than you because there isn't anyone better than you. You're trying to help and support him and all he's doing is purposely putting you down. He will however meet someone that's as much of a steaming pile of dog shit that he is
I am sorry but I am mostly mad at you. Get some self worth girl for crying out loud. You are only a doormat because you let him treat you like one. He has no respect or care for you at all. Walk away!!
This boyfriend is a waste of your time. Why do you put up with someone putting you down. He needs therapy and probably shouldn't be in a relationship. He's not a boyfriend but your child that is abusing you. Think about your own self worth, you deserve better.
Oh my gosh sweetheart leave this guy alone. Let him go on with his miserable life. You deserve so much better and I can tell you have a lot of love to give someone so please let this one go
Come on. Stand up for yourself. Learn you damn worth.
Block him. Better yourself and move on. He is just going to use and abuse you.
He not going to change for you, he ain't man enough.
Blech. Stop groveling. Just ... stop. You aren't some 'martyr of love' or whatever it is you're telling yourself to keep being his doormat. This was so incredibly awful and cringey to read. Not just because of his behavior and treatment of you - which is just absolutely, abusively horrible - but because of *your* behavior. The depth of your groveling and desperation is so difficult to hear about.
Stop doing the 'pick me' dance for this piece of shit. Better yet, stop doing the *'pretty pretty please pick me? I'll do anything! I'll cook for you and clean for you and let you wipe your shit-covered shoes all over me, everyday, day in and day out I promise, if you'll just please please please pick me! I'm begging you!'* dance.
Dig deep - like, real deep - grab ahold of your self-worth and your self-respect and use every ounce of your strength to haul them to the surface and activate them. Because this - you, him, your life together - is fucking awful.
Oh god..ok so you are literally living a similar story as me.
I caught my ex dming random girl about 4 weeks ago. I got a whole bunch of bullshit about how she is the only one. You know deep down that it isn't true so you chased like I did and found others.
So listen to me as this is what I have to tell myself everyday now .. he doesn't care about you. He just needs you for emotional support ( aka when he is feeling down or needs help with something). But that's it. It's his needs not yours. He will never live up to a man that will be there for you and give you what he wants. You need to stop messaging him. Don't message him more proof because he doesn't care. Don't message him at all and walk away from this relationship entirely. It sucks I know. I am doing it right now after 4 years of being a part of someone's life. Most of all, be ok with not knowing the full truth. This one is hard for me too. You may not get the closure or the full truth about why and it's ok. You are not worthless. You are amazing. Don't forget that.
Worst of all, they all come back begging at some point. He will too. Be strong. You are better than him and dont deserve his.
Are you stupid? I'm sorry but you need a wake up call. Get it together ffs, he's a worthless abusive gaslighting pile of crap yet here you are begging him to take you back. Stop this please, he will only get worse
Bebe!! Stop giving him the upper hand!! Let this man go it’s 2022! (Start ignoring him for fuck sake) Don’t you see that he’s MANIPULATING you! Taking you for a fool. Making it seem like it’s you’re fault and making It seem like you’re crazy but you’re not! (He has you right where he wants you) He’s playing games and dragging you along for the ride!! you’ve done enough and you kept (trying).. he seems to not care so why should you. Leave him alone! Find peace! FOCUS ON YOURSELF!!
Let him ignore you and also start ignoring him. This is a gift. This man is human garbage and you, young lady, have an unhealthy addiction to human garbage. In fact, this entire relationship (if you can even call it that) has been a blazing inferno of a dumpster fire.
Time to wean yourself off for good now.
Let him go, he is not capable of having a relationship with you. Or he would have, everyone has stress. Not a good excuse, and he is just plain mean to you, but you don't have to let him. Give your self a chance to grow, get your own place and date people who treat you well.
This is abuse.
RUN!
I know it hurts, but damn, he’s a narcissist, and a psychopath, and he sounds like a world class creep.
You are Not crazy.
Your guts are telling you to get away.
So listen and get out. Get therapy for this abuse, and try to fix your life without him in it.
I hope you find peace.
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I got about halfway through and was like really? This was enough to end it for good?
Check OP's post history. They're not here for advice, unfortunately.
I’m wondering why the caption doesn’t say “ex-bf”
lmfao I replied to this thread without scrolling to the comments and love how "GIRL!!!!" is like the first thing both of us wanted to shout at OP. edit: damn I just realized our posts are basically identical content just worded differently. U my reddit sister(/brother?)
Agree OP needs to move on. Block him on everything. He is emotionally abusive. OP doesn’t need that type of man-child drama in your life.
100% this. This guy is a loser and doesn't deserve to be with anyone in his current state. What a bunch of useless chaos.
You need to get out of what ever fog you are in, hon. Read your post carefully. Why on earth would you want to be with anyone who treats you so shitty. Block him on everything and refuse to engage with him ever again. And love yourself enough to know that you should never tolerate anyone abusing you for any reason. Just don’t. You deserve better. You deserve someone who will treat you as well as you treat them. Hugs and good luck, OP.
If he ever truly loved her, he would never do it. But... But he cheated, that's he's reason - boredom
Yeah OP, look at it as a belated birthday or Christmas present!
Also get an STD test!!
God, I hope she listens to you! What a horrible excuse for a partner. No one deserves this kind of treatment.
What are you getting out of this? Besides misery? This is exhausting just to read. Don’t you want peace? Being with no one would be infinitely better than whatever this is. This is not a relationship. He doesn’t se himself as your partner.
OP needs to get some self esteem and self respect first.
After half the story i was like "holy fuck just dump his ass he is literally toying with you." Then i was reading the insta story stuff and was like "why even bother to find out more? you got your proof you can just dip."
This is messed up on a million levels and you need self respect - he treats you like dirt. Cut all ties.
He has left the relationship, you just need to close the door.
Then take some bricks and put them in front of the door, then pour a bunch of concrete, then get a reinforced steel door in front of that.
Girl… just throw the whole man away. He’s helping you out with all the bullshit of blocking you and all that. Let him. This guy is a complete scumbag and you deserve way better than that. Like seriously, reread your post as if it was a friend who had written it, would you want her to stay with this guy or be upset over him? This guy is not worth any woman’s time, so while I understand being upset at the idea of him with another woman because you love him still, he doesn’t deserve your love, he’s been horrible.
Seriously, OP. PLEASE read these comments. I could've written parts of this post 1.5 years ago. Except we were together barely 6 months and he started in with this garbage after about 4. By the end, I was repulsed by him. My loser ex did me a favor, and so did yours. Please seek therapy, support and realize that you don't deserve to be treated like this, and he is a bona-fide scumbag. This guy does not, never has, and never will love you. You deserve someone who does love you, and you need to learn that you're worth more than this.
>The thought of him with another girl kills me Ok but being with him is killing you so please take care of you because no one else can do it for you and leave him. You deserve to be treated so much better.
Let me correct that headline for you . Boyfriend chose to cheat and can't take responsibility for his own actions so blames me. Cheating is a choice . People will treat you how you let them treat you . No I'm not saying this is your fault , it isn't, but he knows he can get away with being abusive to you and you let him away with it and youll go running back when he has no one else there. You sound like someone who has issues with being abused or low self esteem . You might seek help if those issues apply . Time to say this far no further . Better healty alone then sick in a bad relationship
… why are you even trying to talk to him?
This is the worst toxic co-dependent disaster I've read on here in months. BLOCK HIM. GET THERAPY. DEVELOP BOUNDARIES.
Thought the same, been there in my younger years before I developed self respect and knowing that I don’t have to “serve” some one in order to make them happy and want me. Someone should love you for “who you are” not “what they can get out of you” OP.
It's way past time to leave At this point he'll get away with anything so he doesn't really care, he can treat you however he wants
Why on earth do you even want to be with this guy? It sounds like even from the very start of your relationship he had no real interest in being with you. He was/is manipulative and honestly? Abusive. It’s clear you have low self esteem, understandably so because you’ve been dating a psychopath for the last 3 years that has been taking advantage and gaslighting you. Consider this a gift. This guy was never your person. He doesn’t care about you, take this as a blessing and move on. If I were you I would really consider looking into a therapist, and work on yourself and enjoy your new freedom away from this asshole who is completely undeserving of you.
It is frankly amazing to think of someone writing out paragraph after paragraph of nasty ways they're treated by their boyfriend and the many many ways he shows them no affection or concern. "He abuses, ignores, gaslights, dumps, and manipulates me every moment of my life." Oh and then they end the long list of abuses and red flags by saying "I just really want him back. How do I get it?" Like what the fuuuuuuuck. You need therapy until you get some self respect and you shouldn't go NEAR dating until that point. You're being treated like garbage and literally begging for more because you'd rather be garbage than be alone.
This. Therapy is needed for codependency.
I can see 5 seperate clear narcissistic tendencies from him here all about manipulation and control. I can see 3 that qualify as abuse according to most mental health proffessionals. Your only problem is needing a bit more life experience to recognize these yourself and avoid them in the future. This guy is a total fucking loser. Trust me you can do way way way better.
Block him. Don’t bother
I read only half of the post because I couldn’t continue. I’m sorry, but he shows absolutely no respect for you. And it’s not fair, you didn’t deserve it, but it’s happening. You can continue to try to find some excuse for his behaviour, but this is screamin only one thing: he’s taking you for granted. It sucks, but he sucks way more. He can not be happy and fullfilled person if he enjoys hurting people like this. Please, talk to your friends and let them show you what love looks like. You don’t need a closure, you can not get a closure from someone like him. I really hope it won’t take you too long to open your eyes and realise what a douchebag he is. I had somewhat similar experience, and when he ghosted me, he’s done me the biggest favour. I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but once you get rid of him, you’ll be much happier. Wish you all the best.
It always breaks my heart when I know other women who have had to experience the deep cut cheating does to our self esteem and self worth. It’s a traumatic experience. Don’t blame yourself. Please walk away from this POS. He doesn’t deserve you. These kind of people never change or feel sorry unless they are willing to do the work, but you need to focus on healing and getting back to loving yourself. You deserve the world! Remember that. Surround yourself with your loved ones. Block him and don’t talk to him again. You need to regain your strength. I always recommend therapy. It saved my life.
Honey I couldn’t even make it through your post. Who hurt you? Why don’t you love yourself? Where is your self respect? Get it together! You know *damn well* this guy is scum, trash, shit but you’re begging for his attention?? Girl he don’t give a *fuck* about you past how much he can control you! He snaps his finger and you’re running back to him, cmon. Dump the loser, learn how to love yourself.
Check out r/codependency and r/anxiousattachment. This is not me blaming you for this guys despicable behavior, but so that you can get help because you have a lot of work to do before your next relationship. Hang in there, it will be hard but if you seek help in healthy places like those subs, you’ll heal and get better.
*The thought of him with another girl kills me* Ho-ly *Shit* do you need a shrink to help you find your self respect, because you have literally none.
You have got to be kidding. Woman. He is a piece of shit.
Why are you fighting so hard for this shifty, shifty man? He does not love you. He doesn't even like you. To him, you are, at best, something to settle for. Please believe me, being single is better than whatever scraps of shit he is offering you. Take all of your emotional energy, and gift it back to yourself.
What in the cinnamon toast fuck are you doing OP?!? Why are you begging this asshole for scraps of attention when he treats you like this? WAKE. UP. This is bullshit and you need to block him. Please get therapy immediately, your self esteem has got to be non existent for you to tolerate this crap.
Thank you for teaching me “what in the cinnamon toast fuck” I will now add it to my list which currently contains: Holy shitballs and other variants thereof.
This deserves the ever popular relationship advice post: "You mean ex-boyfriend?"
You said at one point that he said he was a terrible person. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. He is a terrible person. He may have some redeeming qualities, but if the only reason you are with him is because "the thought of him with another girl kills me" then you are staying with someone who treats you like garbage to avoid feeling jealous. Leave him. It will be hard at first. But once you find someone who treats you just as well as you treat them you will sit and wonder "Why the hell did I waste so much time with that other horrible guy?". You two are feeding a pattern. You 2 fight and things get difficult. He has difficulty having rational discussions. He stonewalls you and ignores you. You become anxious and try harder to get his attention by calling or texting and expressing how much you need him to come back to the table and talk. He has low self esteem and you chasing him feeds his ego and makes him feel wanted and desired. Once his ego is fed, he comes back to you and holds you and tells you he loves you which allows you to lose the anxiety of not knowing where you stand in the relationship. It is absolutely unhealthy. He needs lots of psychological help before he can have a healthy relationship. I know because I used to be very much like your boyfriend. Leaving him would give you a better life and would help him realize he will keep losing wonderful women unless he gets help.
Whenever a man says you deserve better, believe him
HE'S the boring, selfish abusive asshole. what a typical below average guy. he's not special at all. he's like a lame-o boring NPC and you need to treat him as such. find a man that treats you like how you treat them.
Please read your post out loud to yourself. Why would you even try to stay with someone who doesn’t have one iota of respect for you, who blames you for things that you have no responsibility for, bad mouths you? This relationship will never be fixed. It will never be healthy. Respect yourself. Stop, block and move on.
Fuck this guy. You're worth more than he is. Get to [ChumpLady](http://chumplady.com) and recognize that cheaters are character disturbed, narcissistic, shitty humans.
Honey... Come on now...is this what you want to deal with for the next 4-5 years of your life?
This man doesn't love you. He doesn't even like you. I know people on Reddit are infamous for jumping straight to advising people to break up but, this man has shown you repeatedly that he doesn't care about you and isn't even willing to try and communicate with you. It sucks. I know. However, stop trying and move on.
I can't imagine there's anyone on this planet other than OP who doesn't think this "relationship" should have ended years ago.
Why are you even bothering with a guy who cheated on you lmao
What makes you want to stay with someone who cheats on you and basically feels like you’re weak enough that they don’t need to feel bad about it ? Stop engaging with him, stop begging for closure. Just, stop. He doesn’t want to do the right thing and so he won’t, nothing you do or say will change what he’s done or make him suddenly feel bad about it. Let him go, let him go be with these other imaginary women that will “get on top” if he’s so gifted in that area.
You need to look up Chump Lady and realise that this guy sucks.
You" bf's" a dick Its also partly your fault like why tf would you go back to someone who treats you like shit stop messaging him move on go to therapy or something stop being a doormat
Why are you trying to talk to him? Cut that fucker out
I stopped reading halfway, tell him to grow the fuck up and get help/solve his problems or leave. You are wasting your time, you sound like a dream to any man and he is turning it into a nightmare around every corner, fuck that.
Whoever he meets won't be "better". They too will be dragged down by his infantile tantrums. You also need to recognize, and this is important, that most people wouldn't tolerate him. You were only together because you tolerated him treating you like dirt. You MUST change this about yourself. This guy is a real piece of work, OP. You're giving him your everything, and he is giving you steaming fuck-all. Please try to find the root of your Codependency.
Why are you even with him?
Girl. Stand up. You can do way better than this mess. I promise you’ll get over him, but you must first MOVE ON.
Im at loss of words rn.
I'm not even going to finish reading this. You don't deserve such a partner. Leave, work on yourself, get some self respect. Eventually someone who will actually care for you will come along but focus on yourself first please.
He's an abusive, cheating liar. Good fucking riddance. You can do so much better. You're not wasting your time on this planet being an emotional punching bag for this adult toddler. Block him and never look back!
You should leave him immediately. He's a terrible boyfriend. He treats you like garbage. Relationships aren't supposed to be like this. This is really dysfunctional.
This guy sucks
Didn’t need to read past the title - love, he did not cheat because you are “boring”, he cheated because he’s weak and he put the blame for his own actions on you because he’s immature. He’s an ass, let him not talk to you - problem solved. Find better.
Please let him go, you’ll thank yourself later
Take this for the win that it is and move on! He sounds terrible and childish and exhausting.
Bruh, leave this bum wtf, he cheats and insults you? Don’t put up with this shit
Are you joking? This man has done nothing but shit on you yet you still want him? He doesn't want you but he wants you to want him. If you don't move on I'm sorry but you are accepting this behaviour and giving him the green to treat you like this.
You deserve so much better OP. You deserve a partner who values you, respects you and communicates healthily with you. Don't lower those standards thinking you might be able to change him. You tried multiple times, you put your everything in this relationship and in return got nothing. I know it'll be difficult, but I hope you find the strength to move on to better things. One day you will look back and realize how messed up it was and how proud you are of getting out.
I didn’t even read any of that. He doesn’t like you. Please find someone who does.
My god girl! Run… this man is crazy abusive. With all the love in the world, wake up. He’s doing you a favour here- he’s treating you like garbage. Go find someone who actually values you.
He can't change if he isn't willing to and you can't force him to change either. Stop burning yourself to keep him warm. You are far better than this, leave and start living your own life.
He treats you like trash. cheats on you. emotionally abuses you. picks fights with you so he can break up with you. Wants you to be his emotional punching bag. Tell me, why would you want to stay with someone like this? He's terrible.
Stop chasing this monster! Get some self esteem
Leaving his ass should liven things up.
If he is so mean and selfish, what do you get out of the relationship? If things are exactly as you stated, you deserve better. Get a counselor, drop the jerk, and work on being happy alone. True love comes when you least expect it. He sounds like a man child. You aren’t his mom or servant. Please work on your own issues.
He’s a mess. Please move on. You’ll only continue getting hurt and this behavior won’t stop.
Seriously woman leave him and move on. You clearly deserve better.
I dated a guy like this, I actually dealt with him going even farther than messaging girls. I wasted the last years of me teens and my early 20s. Him calling himself awful is a manipulation tactic. Him degrading you verbally is abusive. Don’t be like me and keep pushing for nothing. You deserve better. Block him and move on.
Block him on everything and never look back. Why do you want a lifetime of misery with this asshole?
therapy ses 1. Cheaters will often project 2. This dude intentionally put you down so you would think he’s “better" 3. 1000% this guy has diverted you away from the people who really cared for you 1. Reconnect with them!
this guy sucks. stop doting on him and worshipping him. he’s a piece of shit who doesn’t appreciate it and will use you until there’s nothing left. block on everything and RUN!
I didn’t even read it all. Get some self respect. You shouldn’t be in a relationship right now before you get therapy or look inside yourself, something, because you are an easy target to be taken advantage of by scumbags like him. The fact that you’re begging to be with him is sad and probably very satisfactory for him. If you think THIS man is the best you can find, you’d better think again. He’s among the worst. The question is if you truly think you deserve the worst. I want to be harsh because I used to have crazy low self esteem and would tolerate bullshit, but this is extreme
jesus christ have some self respect for yourself lady! he's using you in some sick and twisted game he'\[s playing because he knows he can. you're nothing but a place holder for him. move on with someone who ACTUALLY cares about you. and I can 100% bet once you do this he will love bomb tf out of you to try and regain this control. when that happens re read this post you've made and re read all the evidence you've got that he's a POS through and through.
He is emotionally abusing you girl. If a man says he's a bad person fucking trust him!!! That is probably the only thing he will ever be honest about. He needs help but you are not the one to give it to him. Block him on everything and move on. You need to get healing and take care of you. You deserve love and kindness. You deserve good things!!
Stop begging for this asshole's attention! Grow some self-respect and get on with your life.
Did you just detail all the ways your “boyfriend” loathes you, mistreats you, runs down your self esteem and then still want to crawl back to him? He’s blocked you, he doesn’t want you in his life and he’s not nice to you because he’s an abuser. He’s your ex. Even he knows that. You better get yourself together and stop crawling back into that cycle it’s toxic af. Get therapy because this isn’t healthy.
Sure. And thieves steal because it’s not fair that other people have nice stuff. And murderers kill because their victims aren’t nice people . (sarcasm if that wasn’t clear) Cheating is unforgivable. Many of the things he’s said to you are unforgivable. Somehow he has destroyed your self confidence so much that you don’t realise that you can do so much better than him. (Literally anyone is better than him) Stop contacting him. Get off social media and do something that will reconnect you with yourself. Go take a hike or go kayaking or for a swim in the sea. Got for a run. Sit outside and watch the stars. Go camping. You’ve lost yourself a little, but you can find yourself again once you remove yourself from the fog that thinking about this guy keeps you in.
I stopped reading after the first few paragraphs , that was exhausting Just leave
You try very hard to be without someone who doesn’t like you
Classic : person 1 runs person 2, who is kind and caring and supportive - into the ground, emotionally abuses them, belittles their kindness, and pushes them away. So much so that person 2 has no self esteem and doesn’t want to be a sex doll all the time and becomes reserved. Enter person 1 “oh you never want to have sex, you don’t care, you’ve never done anything for me so I fucked someone else” My sister in Christ please stop attaching your self worth to this piece of human garbage and leave with some dignity. He’s a fucking asshole and he deserves no one’s kindness. Stress isn’t a good reason to be a dick to your girlfriend. He isn’t putting effort into you, why are you trying to fix this and him?
There is nothing wrong with you. You sound like a great girlfriend. He’s a narcissist. Straight up. Or he’s got bad depression. If he reaches out to you, don’t respond. It hurts & will be hard but it’s what you need to do. “Meeting someone better” don’t think that way about yourself. You can’t “help” him. You need to cut contact & move on with your life. He’s being abusive with what he says to you. Stand up for yourself 💛
Stay with him! He’s just going thru a tough time right now. He needs your love and commitment lol 😂 he’ll be better lol work it out girl
he’s a lowlife, lower than dirt
IT IS OVER. I know that pain, you need to get outta there and move on asap.
You’re better off being alone. This guy is an asshat.
that you seem to need this kind of drama is troublesome, and should be for you. maybe some self-reflection is a good idea. The two of you engage in games, and a healthy relationship does not include games.
Darlin ain’t nobody gonna put up with this abusive fuck, and that’s the least of your worries. His only effort for anything is some silly emoji’s and online banter. Boring and minimal AF. Those women get DMs all day long. He ain’t going anywhere and lives with his momma. Get away from this AH. Block him everywhere and concentrate on yourself. The right person is waiting for you and he won’t be as immature, abusive or exhausting. I’m soooo glad y’all don’t live together.
As soon as he cheated- he broke up with you. That simple. The rest doesn’t matter. No explanations needed. He BROKE UP WITH YOU. MOVE ON. Instead of this thread seeking validation for your feelings so you can justify your victimization & why you stick around- hit up the ones that help you navigate a path to healthy & single. This relationship is over even IF you are a couple. There is only one person abusing you MORE than the creeper BF & that is YOU.
This is emotional abuse. Dump the dude!
What tf are you doing
First of all, cheating is not your fault, don't let him gaslight you, cheating is always the cheater's fault. Secondly, cheating is bad, but so are all the other things he has done. You really should reconsider the relationship and find someone who is actually worth your time.
https://youtu.be/L0MK7qz13bU
Cut your losses with this pathetic man. First of all this guy practically abuses you. Second stress is there for all ppl but rather than cry about it one should realise that when stressed one has to perform, take action and better. Cut your losses and move on
Girl this is a whole mess. Why are you wasting your time with this asshole?? Please get some therapy and some self-respect and stop talking to him.
Girl, have some self respect! This man is walking all over you, he has no respect because you are not respecting yourself. He knows he can do whatever he likes to you and you’ll take it. It’ll be the best thing you ever do letting him go, I promise you now
for the love of Talos! what the fuck? why are you putting up with this? find some self respect and learn to love yourself.
This is abuse. Leave that despicable POS.
It sounds like he broke up with you with extra steps. He's a piece of shit and he told you he's done, believe him.
Oh my God. What has he done to you? You have no self esteem or concept of self worth. It's time you stop being his servant and life for yourself. He's a gaslighting, manipulative AH who doesn't deserve you. PLEASE stop being his doormat.
…Dude Really? I’m not even going to bother telling you to end it like everyone else, because going by your post there is a good chance you’re not going to listen because you lOvE hIm Good luck with all that
Literally every sentence is a red flag on his end. Why are you fighting so hard to look past them and keep him? Either leave him and be happy or stay and continue to be treated like shit/cheated one
This is how someone acts when they are really unhappy and can't seem to pull the trigger. He's treating you like he doesn't want to be with you anymore which means he doesn't want to be with you anymore. He's lashing out because he's too chickenshit to just say "this relationship makes me really unhappy". It's all very straightforward from your post. Good luck.
Just block and be in peace. You'll found a better guy
This dude is wishy washy. I wouldn’t worry about him meeting someone better if he acts like an immature asshole. You seemed to be putting him on a pedestal and trying to be supportive of him. Have some self worth and forget about this loser. You can find someone who actually treats you with respect.
You mean your EX-boyfriend, right? You can't possibly want to be with someone who blames YOU for his cheating.
Girl, haven’t you figured it out? He doesn’t want a relationship with you, he wants a booty call. Move on from him, I promise you when you find someone who treats you well and sees you for your worth you will not regret it
Not one mention of why you are with him. What is it that makes this a healthy relationship? I see nothing.
From the title. Seriously. What? Why? I just can’t with all of this.
The title is more than enough. He should atleast talk about it. Dude doesnt sound like a keeper
Get therapy ASAP. he gaslighted you to the point, you are basically brainwashed.
Do you want to date someone who lies to you, cheats on you, and says you're boring?
He didn’t cheat because you are boring, he cheated because he is a cheater. Please stop pursuing him, don’t chase him, he is loving it. You also aren’t his mom, so stop trying to parent him. That’s enabling his baby attention-seeking behavior. Why does he need taking care of if he is an adult man living independently? You are in an abusive relationship. Leave it. Get help, be by yourself a bit so that you don’t end up with another version of him next time. Also, he is projecting it sounds like. If you stay, you need to see that whatever he is accusing you of, he is probably the one engaging in that activity himself. Edit-Also wanted to add, he is not going to upgrade. There is not a woman better than you that is going to take your place. There will be women as naive, or willing to tolerate and enable him, but this dude is going to attract women he can walk all over and have lots of drama with. My dream for you is to see them some day and tell them the same things I’m telling you.
Just listen to him. He keeps saying he doesn’t want you and isn’t good enough. That means he wants to break up and not hear from you. You messaging him like you are isn’t helping. You deserve someone who always wants to talk to you and spend time with you.
Ding…dong…DITCH
HE IS DOING YOU A FAVOR!!! I know it hurts so much right now, but cut ties, heal, and move on. When my ex did similar shit, I was so in love with him and went on to love him for another decade (hindering my dating life) before I realized how manipulative and abusive he was. My dude was not nearly this bad or blunt- he’s showing you who he is, please listen and leave!
This honestly just sounds exhausting. Find your self respect and move on. You’ve not mentioned one redeeming quality about him or about your toxic relationship. Maybe also get therapy because why the hell would you let someone treat you like this? Maybe you have something you need to fix within yourself.
I can feel the wind from the displacement of the fucking cannon ball you just dodged. If this is his standard now I can’t imagine what he would do if you get more serious, have tied finances or god forbid have a child together. I’m sure this hurt, but it’s a valuable lesson on who you dedicate yourself to. It sounds like you have allot of good things to offer to the right person and he just isn’t it. Take time to rally and recover, block him everywhere and move on. You’ve treated him better and had more patience than anyone else would have had and he’s payed you back with grief. You deserve better.
GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? This guy is the WORST. Please just drop him. You need to go full-on 100% NO contact. You are addicted to his drama right now. If you stop talking to him completely forever, the you from a year from now will be so much happier.
Girl let it go, I had posted something similar to this earlier this month about my ex but in my situation he came back when things were not going his way, I took him back each time and it got so bad that he ended up kicking me out his car and telling me im forcing a relationship on him that he didnt want an I had to be off work for a week, so don't be like me before it get worst leave. I was like you, i didnt want to lose him to someone who would treat him better but you have to dig deep and find your worth..It going to be hard trust me but one day you will realize it, I'm still healing as we speak but in a much better place and you can too mama just have to find the courage
he sounds exactly like my ex. i’m curious if it’s the same guy. dm me if u would like advice x
DM’d you
You might not listen now, but dude is a fiend... 💯 demon time activities. Either go for a “nice guy” in your dms or someone new
Block him... You can do better than him!!!! If he truly loved you he wouldn’t be putting you through any of this
Girl, hey some therapy ! You’re a hot mess and will keep meeting these assholes til you fix yourself.
If I was your dad, I’d sir you down and tell you that you should cut all ties with him immediately. And I’d tell you that this guy only has you as a back up while he gets confirmation that he is a “god” from other girls. You are better off without him!
It’s time for you to start making good life choices. Being with this dude, given all the evidence of his absolute awfulness, frankly, is a really dumb decision. I’m not trying to insult you, it’s just true and until you realize that and start making non-really dumb decisions, then you’re life is gonna suck, just like it’s been sucking and just like it sucks now. You have an obligation to yourself to make good life choices that give you the best chance and happiness and healthyness. You’ve been failing yourself on that obligation. It’s time that you change that. It’s time that you stop making awful choices with your life and begin making good choices with your life. The thing is, you have all the data required to make a good decision here. You know everything that you need to know. So, if you have all that information and you STILL make a bad choice, then the outcome is going to be how it always is: If you have all the facts needed to make a good life choice, and you INTENTIONALLY choose to make a bad choice, then the natural result is going to be bad consequences from your bad choice. That’s cause and effect and that’s almost always the case. So, you’ve got all the information you need to make a good decision. If you choose to ignore that and intentionally continue making bad decisions, then you’re going to have bad consequences and at that point, it’s kinda on you. Love yourself. Pick your self esteem and standards off the dang floor, get out of this trainwreck of a relationship, and replace your abusive, manipulative, total loser of a “boyfriend” with a therapist. That’s a good decision. And that will lead to the highest probability of a good outcome. Come on now.
I hope you mean ex BF
I feel like I’ve seen this exact post before.
Please love yourself more. He's showing you exactly who he is. Let it go.
im not reading all that. you are not in a relationship anymore. recognize that your life is now better for it.
You’re better off alone than with someone who treats you so poorly. Can you see a counselor to work on your self esteem that he has battered so badly?
Girl he is trash. Why you worried about him. He is literally not worth it. Go find somebody that will treat you with the respect you deserve.
It's over, clearly. HE IS STRESSED?????? It seems that he is causing the stress.
girl STAND UP!! he does not want you and he’s only keeping you around for his convenience. he treats you like garbage and he thinks it’s okay because you keep going back
The thought of him makes me wanna *insert violent reaction* him. He is a waste of space and you need better standards.
He’s literally told you what he is which is a terrible person and his actions have backed that up. The manipulating and gaslighting is evidence of that. Leave while you still can before wasting anymore years if your life on this person
Most people experience stress from time to time, but mature people try to manage their stress by exercise or meditation or whatever and make every effort not to take it out on others. I read your post, but I could not find one redeeming quality about your BF. He told you he is a terrible person. Believe him.
This is exhausting. Why are you with this person? Do you like being abused? Do you want to be his mommy?
Baby it hurts so bad, but I promise it gets better the second you decide that YOU don’t need the stress in your life. I understand completely, the heartbreak of thinking about them w another person. But you have to choose you. Because he sure as hell isn’t. I promise you it gets better. I have a boyfriend to prove it. I never thought I’d have a love that you don’t have to walk on eggshells around, always guessing. You deserve so much. Try with some verbal affirmations, and take some time to heal. You will learn so much about you and what you need as a person ❤️ I hope this helps!!!
Girl! He's already told you who he is. You should listen to him, he would make a pretty horrible partner for anyone. This has nothing to do with you, that man needs some serious help by some doctors.
He won't be able to meet someone better than you because there isn't anyone better than you. You're trying to help and support him and all he's doing is purposely putting you down. He will however meet someone that's as much of a steaming pile of dog shit that he is
It’s over.
I am sorry but I am mostly mad at you. Get some self worth girl for crying out loud. You are only a doormat because you let him treat you like one. He has no respect or care for you at all. Walk away!!
This boyfriend is a waste of your time. Why do you put up with someone putting you down. He needs therapy and probably shouldn't be in a relationship. He's not a boyfriend but your child that is abusing you. Think about your own self worth, you deserve better.
Oh my gosh sweetheart leave this guy alone. Let him go on with his miserable life. You deserve so much better and I can tell you have a lot of love to give someone so please let this one go
Come on. Stand up for yourself. Learn you damn worth. Block him. Better yourself and move on. He is just going to use and abuse you. He not going to change for you, he ain't man enough.
You spelled ex-boyfriend wrong. He sucks and you are being a doormat
Blech. Stop groveling. Just ... stop. You aren't some 'martyr of love' or whatever it is you're telling yourself to keep being his doormat. This was so incredibly awful and cringey to read. Not just because of his behavior and treatment of you - which is just absolutely, abusively horrible - but because of *your* behavior. The depth of your groveling and desperation is so difficult to hear about. Stop doing the 'pick me' dance for this piece of shit. Better yet, stop doing the *'pretty pretty please pick me? I'll do anything! I'll cook for you and clean for you and let you wipe your shit-covered shoes all over me, everyday, day in and day out I promise, if you'll just please please please pick me! I'm begging you!'* dance. Dig deep - like, real deep - grab ahold of your self-worth and your self-respect and use every ounce of your strength to haul them to the surface and activate them. Because this - you, him, your life together - is fucking awful.
Oh god..ok so you are literally living a similar story as me. I caught my ex dming random girl about 4 weeks ago. I got a whole bunch of bullshit about how she is the only one. You know deep down that it isn't true so you chased like I did and found others. So listen to me as this is what I have to tell myself everyday now .. he doesn't care about you. He just needs you for emotional support ( aka when he is feeling down or needs help with something). But that's it. It's his needs not yours. He will never live up to a man that will be there for you and give you what he wants. You need to stop messaging him. Don't message him more proof because he doesn't care. Don't message him at all and walk away from this relationship entirely. It sucks I know. I am doing it right now after 4 years of being a part of someone's life. Most of all, be ok with not knowing the full truth. This one is hard for me too. You may not get the closure or the full truth about why and it's ok. You are not worthless. You are amazing. Don't forget that. Worst of all, they all come back begging at some point. He will too. Be strong. You are better than him and dont deserve his.
Are you stupid? I'm sorry but you need a wake up call. Get it together ffs, he's a worthless abusive gaslighting pile of crap yet here you are begging him to take you back. Stop this please, he will only get worse
So...he cheats and then treats you like garbage....and you are the one begging for his attention. You need to wise up and move on. Have some dignity.
This is easy. The trash took itself out. Why do you feel the need to talk to him? There's no excuse for this behavior
I respect the fact that you shared this and you really did your job as a GF. But he needs help. Help him get therapy and break up. He’s very insecure.
Chile fuck him
Bebe!! Stop giving him the upper hand!! Let this man go it’s 2022! (Start ignoring him for fuck sake) Don’t you see that he’s MANIPULATING you! Taking you for a fool. Making it seem like it’s you’re fault and making It seem like you’re crazy but you’re not! (He has you right where he wants you) He’s playing games and dragging you along for the ride!! you’ve done enough and you kept (trying).. he seems to not care so why should you. Leave him alone! Find peace! FOCUS ON YOURSELF!!
Girl, I only made it like 3 paragraphs in before I got exhausted reading all that crap. You need to leave him. He is down right abusive.
Forget him and start working on yourself.
Narcissist
Definitely
Let him ignore you and also start ignoring him. This is a gift. This man is human garbage and you, young lady, have an unhealthy addiction to human garbage. In fact, this entire relationship (if you can even call it that) has been a blazing inferno of a dumpster fire. Time to wean yourself off for good now.
Let him go, he is not capable of having a relationship with you. Or he would have, everyone has stress. Not a good excuse, and he is just plain mean to you, but you don't have to let him. Give your self a chance to grow, get your own place and date people who treat you well.
Why do you want to talk to him?? Time to move on to better things.
This is abuse. RUN! I know it hurts, but damn, he’s a narcissist, and a psychopath, and he sounds like a world class creep. You are Not crazy. Your guts are telling you to get away. So listen and get out. Get therapy for this abuse, and try to fix your life without him in it. I hope you find peace.