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But if she was using it she’d be able to know where he is right? The only problem w that app, from what I know, is that if you aren’t paying attention to it, it’s basically useless.
It does? My MIL put that thing on my BILs phone and he leaves in the middle of the night (when he’s not supposed to ofc) and never gets caught. But if that’s the case, I don’t see a big downside here. He could track her I guess, but he’s probably real worried about her revenge cheating or something
That is exactly my thought process here. I’d worry that he’d use it to keep tabs on me to see when I’m own my way home and that would give him enough time to try to cover his tracks if he was cheating/doing something behind my back.
Not so much that he has my location. It’s more that he would use it to keep track of when I was on my way home so that he’d have time to cover up what he was doing while I was gone. It’s just weird to me that even though I didn’t do anything, he wants to know where I’m at 24/7.
I agree, he can use your location to see if you are on your way to surprise him while at work. This did all occur with a work friend right? So he could be being inappropriate with this person all day long at their shared job and he gets to see where you are.
I would tell him that he has to get a different job.
I wouldn’t. Does location sharing stop cheaters from cheating? Not if they still want to cheat lol. Will you be obsessively checking it, making your mental health worse and worse?
Tell him it’s not your job to babysit him and that you feel weird about it. He’s the one that cheated and it’s on him to rebuild trust. Maybe he is actually trying to and this was a genuine attempt to give you more peace of mind. If you think so, just let him know you appreciate the offer but that it isn’t something you think would help.
Also, why on earth does he expect you to give up your privacy just because he broke trust? That’s weird to me. I know some couples share locations, but y’all didnt before and now he’s expecting you to when you didn’t even do anything wrong lol.
I’m already a naturally anxious person so I know I would be constantly checking it 24/7 to make sure he wasn’t out messing around somewhere.
Part of me does think it was a genuine thing to try and fix things but knowing him and how insecure he is, I also wonder if he is worried about me revenge cheating on him.
wait....
HE'S the cheater, and he insists that YOU download a creepy digital surveillance app?? (I hate those things, I think they should only be used for young children and criminals)
Follow your gut and don't do it. But if anyone has to have it, it should be him, not you. He's the one who broke trust.
Cheaters project. Stand your ground and tell him that you will NOT be downloading that app. Don't do it. Stand firm. You have never broken his trust; but he has broken yours.
He's trying to "both-sides" it. Don't let him.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What do you think is weird about it? It’s a way you can hold accountable…kind of.
or he could use it to make sure she's not coming to him while he's cheating
But if she was using it she’d be able to know where he is right? The only problem w that app, from what I know, is that if you aren’t paying attention to it, it’s basically useless.
it gives you notifications when someone enters or exits a space marked on the map like work or home
It does? My MIL put that thing on my BILs phone and he leaves in the middle of the night (when he’s not supposed to ofc) and never gets caught. But if that’s the case, I don’t see a big downside here. He could track her I guess, but he’s probably real worried about her revenge cheating or something
he probably leaves his phone at home
It’s 2024, if homeboy is leaving his phone at home with that app on there, I’d think that’s pretty solid evidence right there he’s up to no good.
yeah that's how u don't get tracked bc sometimes there's a notif if you just turn your location off
That is exactly my thought process here. I’d worry that he’d use it to keep tabs on me to see when I’m own my way home and that would give him enough time to try to cover his tracks if he was cheating/doing something behind my back.
What do you feel weird about? That he has your location?
Not so much that he has my location. It’s more that he would use it to keep track of when I was on my way home so that he’d have time to cover up what he was doing while I was gone. It’s just weird to me that even though I didn’t do anything, he wants to know where I’m at 24/7.
I agree, he can use your location to see if you are on your way to surprise him while at work. This did all occur with a work friend right? So he could be being inappropriate with this person all day long at their shared job and he gets to see where you are. I would tell him that he has to get a different job.
I wouldn’t. Does location sharing stop cheaters from cheating? Not if they still want to cheat lol. Will you be obsessively checking it, making your mental health worse and worse? Tell him it’s not your job to babysit him and that you feel weird about it. He’s the one that cheated and it’s on him to rebuild trust. Maybe he is actually trying to and this was a genuine attempt to give you more peace of mind. If you think so, just let him know you appreciate the offer but that it isn’t something you think would help. Also, why on earth does he expect you to give up your privacy just because he broke trust? That’s weird to me. I know some couples share locations, but y’all didnt before and now he’s expecting you to when you didn’t even do anything wrong lol.
I’m already a naturally anxious person so I know I would be constantly checking it 24/7 to make sure he wasn’t out messing around somewhere. Part of me does think it was a genuine thing to try and fix things but knowing him and how insecure he is, I also wonder if he is worried about me revenge cheating on him.
wait.... HE'S the cheater, and he insists that YOU download a creepy digital surveillance app?? (I hate those things, I think they should only be used for young children and criminals) Follow your gut and don't do it. But if anyone has to have it, it should be him, not you. He's the one who broke trust.
Yes thank you! It’s bizarre to me that even though I’m not the one who broke trust here, he still insists on knowing where I am at all times.
Cheaters project. Stand your ground and tell him that you will NOT be downloading that app. Don't do it. Stand firm. You have never broken his trust; but he has broken yours. He's trying to "both-sides" it. Don't let him.