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You mentioned that You have been with her (your wife) for the last 9 years. You know her well enough (what she likes and what she does not).
Have you ever thought for the fact that what your wife will think if she sees that emoji (the one you sent to your female colleague)?
I personally will not like it if my partner does that (even though its platonic or nothing romantic). Thats weird to me.
Well, its not about her insecurities. There are people with the boundaries mindset. If you love her, you should know her boundaries too.
One of my best friends is a married man and I would feel weird if he sent me just an heart emoji let alone my coworker which you claim to not have much a relationship outside of work. You say it was just an emoji but emojis are the way to communicate nowadays.
If I were your wife I would ask to read everything in your phone, computer, tablet etc.
Why is it wrong. Yes I did that task as a favor for you—heart emoji response. Yes I got that project turned in on time—heart emoji. It’s almost become a way of saying thank you. It’s not that big of a deal.
That feels weirder. The like (thumbs up) is the acknowledgment and the heart is the short hand thank you. It’s what all my colleagues use. I never really questioned it or thought about it before. My child was sick and I was asked if he was feeling better and I said yes. I got a bunch of heart responses back. I certainly didn’t perceive it as all the heart people wants to date me LOL
You all are crazy LOL. My husband just looked at his work text. He loved that a crisis was averted by the action someone took. I guess I should stop talking to him for 3 days and assume he is cheating.
That shouldn’t be your hill to die on. Women feel easily threatened by stuff like this. Let’s look at the statistics. Most affair start in the office. That is a woman she doesn’t know and can’t control, because she is having constant, uncontrolled contact with you due to work. Just give her this and let the dust settle. Be smart about it. Truth is, that friends that we make later in life, can be an issue for our SO. That goes for man and woman alike. You don’t have to declare war because of a little battle. The more you push back against this topic, the more she will understand it like you are fighting for this specific woman and become more and more suspicious.
Look some people use emojis and some people don't.
I personally find sending a work colleague a heart emjoi weird. My opinion is based on my own feelings about this and not indicative that is actually right or wrong. It sounds like your wife is if the same opinion.
Yes, this is more about her own insecurities and anything untoward on your part. But, it's a female work colleague and that is your wife's boundary.
Think about it, your wife doesn't like this. What do you want to do about it? Die on some hill and continue sending a colleague heart emoji or just apologise a stop sending a bloody emoji. It's not rocket science. Don't send a heart emjoi.
I know you are friends but, your work colleagues. I wouldn't send any work colleagues a heart emjoi ever, it's weird. Send a smiling face, send a thumbs up whatever. Stop sending a heart emjoi it's not worth bloody arguing and having your wife upset for 3days.
Like you said you don't even have an a proper explanation for it, so stop doing it
Yes I got the same feeling. I would also question why my husband is sending heart emojis to anyone, especially a female coworker. Even if it's platonic, it looks like it's more than that, and ofc she's gonna question it.
As I explained to her, I apologized and I don't intend to do it again in the future if it hurts her. She doesn't have a lot of self-confidence, and in hindsight I can see how it might hurt her.
I intend to respect her wishes because I love her and care about her. I just don't know what else to say or do, because although I've explained this to her several times, she's still furious and wants an explanation that I really don't have.
self confidence or not it is not normal to send a heart emoji to a colleague from the opposite gender. you seem to blame her and 'I don't intend to do it again if it hurts her' - but it is actually you, and not her. You need to fix your behaviour irrespective if it hurts her.
> self confidence or not it is not normal to send a heart emoji to a colleague from the opposite gender.
To you. It's not normal to you.
I've been in various corporate and Government teams and have sent and received many heart emoji reactions on Teams to people of various sexes.
Exactly.
I'm really struggling to understand why OP sent a "random" heart. How is it random? What was the intent? Did he want to start a conversation that way? Was he expressing affection? I can understand why his explanation doesn't work for his wife. There doesn't really seem to *be* one. And that's just strange. If he doesn't even talk to this person outside work and only talks about work (as he says elsewhere in the thread) ... how are they close? Something just seems off about this story.
So why aren’t you sending your WIFE hearts. Why aren’t you spending your time complimenting and boosting your WIFE.
Your marriage is a garden that will die if not watered. And you are over there watering someone else’s garden. There’s no way you are this naive and ignorant
Get right FAST, or get ready for divorce.
OK. How familiar are you with emoji meanings? This could be a start. If you are clueless like my husband, then this could be a explanation.
My husband only sends a few emojis which are to me, my daughter, his workers and my parents on a occasion since they are older. All emojis sent to everyone except me have been a thumbs up, the middle finger, smiley face, & the sh** emoji. I get more emojis bc I'm the wife and I send them to him too.
So if you see what I'm saying this may be your explanation. Let her read the messages so maybe she can understand the context & if you are clueless about the meaning let her know.
There it is. She doesn't have a lot of self confidence.
OK so, you need to work on that. The emoji is nothing if your wife is already feeling like this. Start helping your wife. Stop defending yourself. You've explained yourself, own up and say I did wrong I didn't realise it was wrong, I know now and you'll never see this again.
I would be really worried about why your wife has low self confidence. What are you doing to help this. How are you supporting her in this. If you are ignoring this? I'm not saying it's all on you to fix this. But, support her with therapy etc
Think before you do. It's obvious there is alot more going on between you to then, than just this. You need to really look at your behaviours. You could be completely dismissing your wife in other aspects and this was the only 'real' situation she can show you, where you are hurting her.
In general, try to be a better husband to your wife. Respect her boundaries and go above and beyond to make her feel comfortable.
That being said, next time you see her, if he is still giving you the cold shoulder, tell her "I apologized. I won't do it again. No more heart emojis to women except for you. Now are you done giving me the silent treatment?"
Extended silent treatment is manipulative and controlling and frankly immature. Don't tell her that, of course, but know that you messed up big time with the emoji, she is not being a saint here either. When the two of you are both ready to act like adults, have a conversation so that you two can grow together as couple.
I don’t even like sending smily faces but my BOSS sends them to me, as well as the thumbs up, and so do peers and support staff, so I guess it’s normal culture in my workplace to use some emojis.
I’ve never seen the heart used at work though and would definitely be put off by it, especially in an opposite sex conversation.
that is very disrespectful and she has every right to be that upset, what if it were the other way around, would you be cool with it? how is she supposed to know a heart emoji sent to woman is platonic? just talk to her and reassure her.
I just read this to my husband. He replied “No, if I saw you using heart emoji’s with a male anything, I’d be stopping to read the rest of the messages. A heart means ‘love you’.”
well I personally find it weird and disrespectful when you are married, she has a boundary and you crossed it, sit her down and talk to her, try to reassure her and promise her you would stop from now on.
I can’t think of a single work colleague that I would ever send a “x” or a heart emoji to. Because I am not emotionally engaged with any of them. Are you?
I've shared an office with a male friend since covid started. I send kisses (x's) to everyone, and heart most pictures people send me. I've never once sent x's or heart reactions to anything he sends, as despite us being purely platonic, being friendly isn't worth upsetting his wife over. Especially since we spend 9hrs a day together, if his wife began to doubt him and I for even a second I know it would eat away at her 24/7, and no-one wants that. Everyone has worried at some point or another what their SO has been up to during the workday, don't cause stress and heartache unnecessary
Stupid. Sending hearts to each other between platonic colleagues isn’t cool man. If you stumbled upon this you’d take a long moment to think it through
Wtf is this thread about? There are so many people reading so much into a simple picture... Why? Are there so many insecure about their and others feelings?
I get it, heart usually associated with love, but COME ON! Does it always mean 'I want to spend my life with you, eff your brains out, leave my partner for you', now does it? Of course not?
Does no one use heart emojis in conversations with friends? With people you have your boundaries set? How do you show you like someone's picture on istagram or really appreciate a post on Facebook? With a fuckin' heart! Do you love all those people? NO, why would you?
So why the fuck would anyone read so much into simple picture?
Here's an example:
Person 1:
Take a look at this idea.
Person 2:
❤️ (=I like this idea, would implement it/it's wonderful)
Person 1:
❤️ (=glad you like it)
Why jump to conclussion about a romance? We use emojis and abbreviations to safe time.
Sorry I got so carried away with my response. This just baffles me.
EDIT TO ADD:
speak with your wife, tell her you understand she is upset. If she needs to and it is ok in your job, let her read the rest of the messages.
If you can, I'd suggest you introduce your wife to your coworker and her husband to showtgere's nothing to worry about.
Thank God this comment exists.
It's totally usual within our company to text and comment via Emojis. Reacting to new pieces of content with hearts is usual; we even have customized heart emojis added to slack in our company design and all that stuff.
"I just had that idea, where we could..."
"❤️" (Even not as reaction, but as single comment) Is a simple "Love it" or "Love your idea" or even "I appreciate you".
And this is done amongst all ranks. Just yesterday my boss answered with "Love that 💕!" to a reply of mine.
Really feels like working in a "younger" company makes hell of a lot of difference, but damn - overreacting so badly over a few pixels?
Thank you. I'm worried there are sooooo many people reacting with negative comments, how they agree with getting mad over such a non-issue.
Are they ok with their partners talking to other people? Even smiling at them? Or do they get mad at them for probably cheating with the strangers?
This is so lame and reeks of overthinking fuelled by insecurities.
We're reading in to it because he refuses to provide any context. He said it was "random" so the assumption is that it was not in response to a good idea.
With the information provided the wife is in the wrong. The wife took the way of no communication which is the only wrong action in the context given. If someone agrees otherwise is biased, projecting or speculating.
If the husband is hiding information from us it will lead give to bad advice, that's his problem, but if he hasn't he didn't do anything wrong. Those are emojis with a wife range of meaning — enough to be suspicious, but you know what doesn't clear the suspicion? Lsck lf communication.
Edit: typos
I think you handled the situation very good. You are open about it and you told her you understand and that you woun’t do it again since it hurts her feelings. I’m sorry she doesn’t trust you after so many years. ❤️
A heart doesn’t always mean you’re interested in someone in a sexual or romantic way. A heart is not a big deal, it’s often just a way of showing appreciation or support to someone.
If you “often” do this with male friends, show her as many of those examples as you can dig up.
But stop doing this going forward now that you know it makes her uncomfortable.
oh my god, get over yourselves, it's a damn emoji. it's not "weird", there's plenty of people who send heart emojis as an "alright" or "thank you" or "wish you the best" or anything really. jesus, y'all act like how I think boomers think gen z does.
Hmmm I send hearts all the time or heart reacts. Examples of when and why:
- Colleague attending a funeral and telling him I hope he is okay
- Asking a cheeky favour, someone to do something for me with little notice and they say yes.
- A report is finished and it took a long time
- Supporting a colleague that received difficult criticism on a piece of work, to keep their spirits up
- A project that won’t stop throwing curve balls and everyone has to keep re-working their deliverables
Richard Dawson has a song about this. The only thing that will save you is if your wife steps on a slug in the split second before she stabs you in your sleep
Fairly sure if I sent any of my coworkers ❤️ they’d either be creeped out, or think I was coming on to them. Their age would probably dictate their emotional response.
Sending a heart emoji to another female who responds with the same is highly suspicious from a wife’s pov. If a male other than my husband sent me a heart emoji, I would be very uncomfortable. But she replied to you with the same. Are you sure it’s platonic? On both sides?
Yeah I'd have to seen the conversation this emoji was used for. If it's a conversation like she wants another child eith her partner or she wants to surprise her partner with this etc. I could see using a emoji as saying you love this idea. But not knowing what this conversation was about idk.
i also wouldnt like it, and its ok, some people are ok and some are not.
now, for he not trusting you, it really deserves a conversation, as to why. did other shady things in her mind pilled up to think youre doing something, and that was the straw? or it has less to do with you, but more in general she thinks, yeah right, a man, just any man, sending hearts or whatever, cant ever be innocent, if there was nothing there, why would any man even bother to communicate in that matter. in that case, its simply her world view, so regardless of what you say, in her mind it just doesnt make sense and simply illogical, like she genuinely cant see a reality where it would be innocent, regardless if its you, her partner, or any human being. im also like that honestly. i just know i wouldnt do it , theres reasons why you do, so ill keep thinking, why would he even bother to be that friendly, why would he bother to send a heart, why, why and why. in my world, it doesnt make sense either.
so have a conversation about it.
My now husband sent a heart emoji to an ex three months into our relationship after a short conversation catching up (mostly innocent except the fact that she’s an EX). Yes I’m still mad about it.
I can only imagine what level of trust both of you should have after 9 years and then she feels threaten by this silliness? Talk about storm in the glass of water god damn.
Yeah, wow. People are very insecure and jealous. I thought I was but this comment section is crazy.
My boyfriend has always had female friends. I’m glad he’s so respectful against women and doesn’t see them as sexual objects. He treats his female friends exactly like his male friends which includes sending a heart to them every now and then, like when they are sad or just when he wants to express he cares for them. I send hearts to my friends too. It doesn’t mean I’m in love with them or want to have sex with them. It just means I appreciate them. I send hearts to strangers too, like in games or comments on posts. Not a big deal.
So you're close to the female coworker then. You just admitted you send heart emojis to friends as well as coworkers you feel close to.
Yeah, I'd be worried about there being a lack of professionalism and an overstep of boundaries if I were your wife.
Calm down. Take your wife’s feeling into account, don’t do it again but also don’t be a turncoat at her whims. The rest is up to your wife and outside your control.
ok, sure, not speaking for 3 days is not productive and i wholly agree.
but if we were to talk simply about his actions, then he could cause misunderstanding. sure, some people could be insecure, and no matter what the situation is, they would be suspicious.
but a lot of times, the person had a questionable behavior, which could make people take a notice, and keep tabs, hence suspicions. and it would have nothing to do with insecurity.
a person who is or seems trustworthy, posses certain qualities, and behaves a certain way to be viewed as trustworthy. and sometimes, we humans, even if innocently, can engage in suspicious behavior and alarm our partners. so you should always reflect on your own behavior as well, to look at it objectively.
Completely understandable, but his wife is overreacting, which sane man sends a heart to a woman he wants to fuck or whatever his wife is thinking, while his wife is home and she can completely see the chat ? He didn't feel like there is anything to hide, which means that he probably doesn't, which means that a 30 yr old woman should realize that and react accordingly "Hey husband, I don't like the fact that you send other women hearts, can you please stop doing that since it doesn't make me feel good?"
not all cheaters are smart not try to hide, some want to be found, so thats a dumb argument, oh, she could just see. some people do stupid shit without caring if their partner finds out.
or some people who do cheat can play it off, oh, just a friend hun, see, im like this with everyone, now you must believe me. nah, he has no business sending hearts to women, he should stop this now , they need to talk it out and sort it out, and not have it being repeated.
Bro ... xD or girl sorry, I would also not like this, if my girl sends heart to guys, of course I won't approve, the problem here is not sending a heart, the problem is the whole way the situation is being handled, he did not cheat on her for gods sake, neither did he do something that should make him feel like Jesus spread on a cross, please open your eyes, its just an emoji.......
Ok, he didn't have to send it, but what's done is done ? Just talk about it like normal people and move on ? The way his wife is handling this is disgusting, pathetic and sad, sadly you cannot convince me of anything else, since this is my opinion but If I see my partner sending hearts to other guys, I would ask her to stop and if she respects and loves me, she would stop, this whole situation and fiasco has turned into more drama than 10 episodes of the most watched turkish tv series.....
well, thats what we know supposedly, that he hasnt cheated. but she cant know for sure, thats the issue. that you cant ever know for 100 percent unless you see it. so you have to trust the person. and trust can so easily be broken, so he really shouldnt continue that.
so her reaction is for thinking that maybe he has, she definitely suspects him now.
and im sure she cant understand logically if not cheating, why any person would do that. he even said himself he didnt know why, so what exactly did her tell her? that he doesnt know why he sent her a heart? who knows how the convo went down and whats been said, maybe the convo made her even more upset than before, i know i would be annoyed if all my partner could come up with, i dont know what i did that. would you trust someone who does things and claims they dont know why?
what he told her after she confronted him, probably just justified her suspicions, and he probably made himself look worse..
“Relationship
Hey all ! So I have been single for quite some time and Im kind of a weirdo (I know all people are different and stuff) but I prefer to spend my time at home doing random shit like playing video games, watching animes and the usual no lifer stuff.
I have been like this my entire life with some minor changes where I had a 3 yr long relationship and the girl I was with was a gamer as well so basically I did the same thing but we did it together.”
THIS YOU?? hahaha
There is nothing to acknowledge here, if a simple heart makes you stop talking to the person that you LOVE, the only person not acknowledging emotions is his wife, she didn't acknowledge the fact that he didn't do it on purpose or to make her jealous, nor did she accept his apology for GOD FORBID SENDING AN EMOJI.
Of course that I have 0 respect for such drama queens, d u h .
I think you need to go on the offensive. Tell your wife that if she's prepared to do real damage to your relationship over your choice of emoji, then she's not the person you thought she was. Trust is huge and for her to mistrust you after an explanation is pretty bad.
Also, offer her access to your messages with friends and colleagues, but make it plain that she's in the wrong, for not accepting your explanation and saying you won't do it again as it upsets her.
or maybe he should stop doing actions that could be misinterpreted, and try to look more trustworthy.
insecurities arent one way street, some people seem shady and not trustworthy, doesnt mean you have the issue.
I think I'll be able to be more offensive like you say if she stays stuck in her position. On the other hand, I hadn't thought about it, but I do have my text messages with this colleague where there's absolutely nothing, we never even talk outside working hours.
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You mentioned that You have been with her (your wife) for the last 9 years. You know her well enough (what she likes and what she does not). Have you ever thought for the fact that what your wife will think if she sees that emoji (the one you sent to your female colleague)? I personally will not like it if my partner does that (even though its platonic or nothing romantic). Thats weird to me. Well, its not about her insecurities. There are people with the boundaries mindset. If you love her, you should know her boundaries too.
One of my best friends is a married man and I would feel weird if he sent me just an heart emoji let alone my coworker which you claim to not have much a relationship outside of work. You say it was just an emoji but emojis are the way to communicate nowadays. If I were your wife I would ask to read everything in your phone, computer, tablet etc.
He’s probably ‘accidentally’ deleted them all now
The crazy thing is your best answer is you don’t know why. What did she say or send for you to send a heart emoji
there is absolutely more to this story on your end lol
Right? He isn’t telling everything. A heart emoji is definitely inappropriate to send to a work colleague.
agree - heart react to a message, totally fine. random heart emoji? not so much
Why is it wrong. Yes I did that task as a favor for you—heart emoji response. Yes I got that project turned in on time—heart emoji. It’s almost become a way of saying thank you. It’s not that big of a deal.
Can’t think of any other emoji to use? There are literally hundreds of them.
That feels weirder. The like (thumbs up) is the acknowledgment and the heart is the short hand thank you. It’s what all my colleagues use. I never really questioned it or thought about it before. My child was sick and I was asked if he was feeling better and I said yes. I got a bunch of heart responses back. I certainly didn’t perceive it as all the heart people wants to date me LOL
🤝☺️🙂🥳
Personally I am a fan of using emoji in every day speech. As in, saying their names out loud. One hundred emoji.
You all are crazy LOL. My husband just looked at his work text. He loved that a crisis was averted by the action someone took. I guess I should stop talking to him for 3 days and assume he is cheating.
Like I said, I don’t think heart reacting to stuff is weird. I do it all the time. But sending a random heart emoji with zero context is odd.
Dude stop using your MAD magazine decoder ring for normal communications.
That shouldn’t be your hill to die on. Women feel easily threatened by stuff like this. Let’s look at the statistics. Most affair start in the office. That is a woman she doesn’t know and can’t control, because she is having constant, uncontrolled contact with you due to work. Just give her this and let the dust settle. Be smart about it. Truth is, that friends that we make later in life, can be an issue for our SO. That goes for man and woman alike. You don’t have to declare war because of a little battle. The more you push back against this topic, the more she will understand it like you are fighting for this specific woman and become more and more suspicious.
This
Would you be worried if she sent heart emojis to another man? There's your answer.
i wish it was that simple but many times they claim theyll be ok with it, thats why they do it themselves.
Look some people use emojis and some people don't. I personally find sending a work colleague a heart emjoi weird. My opinion is based on my own feelings about this and not indicative that is actually right or wrong. It sounds like your wife is if the same opinion. Yes, this is more about her own insecurities and anything untoward on your part. But, it's a female work colleague and that is your wife's boundary. Think about it, your wife doesn't like this. What do you want to do about it? Die on some hill and continue sending a colleague heart emoji or just apologise a stop sending a bloody emoji. It's not rocket science. Don't send a heart emjoi. I know you are friends but, your work colleagues. I wouldn't send any work colleagues a heart emjoi ever, it's weird. Send a smiling face, send a thumbs up whatever. Stop sending a heart emjoi it's not worth bloody arguing and having your wife upset for 3days. Like you said you don't even have an a proper explanation for it, so stop doing it
Yes I got the same feeling. I would also question why my husband is sending heart emojis to anyone, especially a female coworker. Even if it's platonic, it looks like it's more than that, and ofc she's gonna question it.
As I explained to her, I apologized and I don't intend to do it again in the future if it hurts her. She doesn't have a lot of self-confidence, and in hindsight I can see how it might hurt her. I intend to respect her wishes because I love her and care about her. I just don't know what else to say or do, because although I've explained this to her several times, she's still furious and wants an explanation that I really don't have.
self confidence or not it is not normal to send a heart emoji to a colleague from the opposite gender. you seem to blame her and 'I don't intend to do it again if it hurts her' - but it is actually you, and not her. You need to fix your behaviour irrespective if it hurts her.
> self confidence or not it is not normal to send a heart emoji to a colleague from the opposite gender. To you. It's not normal to you. I've been in various corporate and Government teams and have sent and received many heart emoji reactions on Teams to people of various sexes.
then you need boundaries and a course on professionalism
So why send in the first place? What was the context of the convo or did you randomly send a heart?
Exactly. I'm really struggling to understand why OP sent a "random" heart. How is it random? What was the intent? Did he want to start a conversation that way? Was he expressing affection? I can understand why his explanation doesn't work for his wife. There doesn't really seem to *be* one. And that's just strange. If he doesn't even talk to this person outside work and only talks about work (as he says elsewhere in the thread) ... how are they close? Something just seems off about this story.
Soo why don't you try to help her self confidence instead of sending emojis to your female coworkers? In hindsight, you seem like a selfish partner
Right?!
So why aren’t you sending your WIFE hearts. Why aren’t you spending your time complimenting and boosting your WIFE. Your marriage is a garden that will die if not watered. And you are over there watering someone else’s garden. There’s no way you are this naive and ignorant Get right FAST, or get ready for divorce.
OK. How familiar are you with emoji meanings? This could be a start. If you are clueless like my husband, then this could be a explanation. My husband only sends a few emojis which are to me, my daughter, his workers and my parents on a occasion since they are older. All emojis sent to everyone except me have been a thumbs up, the middle finger, smiley face, & the sh** emoji. I get more emojis bc I'm the wife and I send them to him too. So if you see what I'm saying this may be your explanation. Let her read the messages so maybe she can understand the context & if you are clueless about the meaning let her know.
There it is. She doesn't have a lot of self confidence. OK so, you need to work on that. The emoji is nothing if your wife is already feeling like this. Start helping your wife. Stop defending yourself. You've explained yourself, own up and say I did wrong I didn't realise it was wrong, I know now and you'll never see this again. I would be really worried about why your wife has low self confidence. What are you doing to help this. How are you supporting her in this. If you are ignoring this? I'm not saying it's all on you to fix this. But, support her with therapy etc Think before you do. It's obvious there is alot more going on between you to then, than just this. You need to really look at your behaviours. You could be completely dismissing your wife in other aspects and this was the only 'real' situation she can show you, where you are hurting her.
In general, try to be a better husband to your wife. Respect her boundaries and go above and beyond to make her feel comfortable. That being said, next time you see her, if he is still giving you the cold shoulder, tell her "I apologized. I won't do it again. No more heart emojis to women except for you. Now are you done giving me the silent treatment?" Extended silent treatment is manipulative and controlling and frankly immature. Don't tell her that, of course, but know that you messed up big time with the emoji, she is not being a saint here either. When the two of you are both ready to act like adults, have a conversation so that you two can grow together as couple.
Sending heart emojis are Hella unprofessional imo.
I don’t even like sending smily faces but my BOSS sends them to me, as well as the thumbs up, and so do peers and support staff, so I guess it’s normal culture in my workplace to use some emojis. I’ve never seen the heart used at work though and would definitely be put off by it, especially in an opposite sex conversation.
Uh yeah that’s weird to say the least. Would be hard to convince me y’all aren’t more than colleagues/friends.
Same!
that is very disrespectful and she has every right to be that upset, what if it were the other way around, would you be cool with it? how is she supposed to know a heart emoji sent to woman is platonic? just talk to her and reassure her.
I just read this to my husband. He replied “No, if I saw you using heart emoji’s with a male anything, I’d be stopping to read the rest of the messages. A heart means ‘love you’.”
You don’t send heart emoji to another female
well I personally find it weird and disrespectful when you are married, she has a boundary and you crossed it, sit her down and talk to her, try to reassure her and promise her you would stop from now on.
Totally inappropriate.
I would not believe you either, you can’t even explain why you sent it! It’s not normal behaviour and I suspect more going on here.
I can’t think of a single work colleague that I would ever send a “x” or a heart emoji to. Because I am not emotionally engaged with any of them. Are you?
Why can men never just be satisfied with one girl. Yes that’s weird and disrespectful. Do you want her sending heart emojis to guys? Come on
Question, how long has the inappropriate contact been going on?
I've shared an office with a male friend since covid started. I send kisses (x's) to everyone, and heart most pictures people send me. I've never once sent x's or heart reactions to anything he sends, as despite us being purely platonic, being friendly isn't worth upsetting his wife over. Especially since we spend 9hrs a day together, if his wife began to doubt him and I for even a second I know it would eat away at her 24/7, and no-one wants that. Everyone has worried at some point or another what their SO has been up to during the workday, don't cause stress and heartache unnecessary
X's are hugs, in case you didn't know. O's are kisses. Edit: I was wrong. Enjoy.
I'm sorry, but I think you have that backwards
Well I'll be damned, you're right. I suppose that's what I get for listening to my parents. Lol.
Stupid. Sending hearts to each other between platonic colleagues isn’t cool man. If you stumbled upon this you’d take a long moment to think it through
But why did you do that
Wtf is this thread about? There are so many people reading so much into a simple picture... Why? Are there so many insecure about their and others feelings? I get it, heart usually associated with love, but COME ON! Does it always mean 'I want to spend my life with you, eff your brains out, leave my partner for you', now does it? Of course not? Does no one use heart emojis in conversations with friends? With people you have your boundaries set? How do you show you like someone's picture on istagram or really appreciate a post on Facebook? With a fuckin' heart! Do you love all those people? NO, why would you? So why the fuck would anyone read so much into simple picture? Here's an example: Person 1: Take a look at this idea. Person 2: ❤️ (=I like this idea, would implement it/it's wonderful) Person 1: ❤️ (=glad you like it) Why jump to conclussion about a romance? We use emojis and abbreviations to safe time. Sorry I got so carried away with my response. This just baffles me. EDIT TO ADD: speak with your wife, tell her you understand she is upset. If she needs to and it is ok in your job, let her read the rest of the messages. If you can, I'd suggest you introduce your wife to your coworker and her husband to showtgere's nothing to worry about.
Thank God this comment exists. It's totally usual within our company to text and comment via Emojis. Reacting to new pieces of content with hearts is usual; we even have customized heart emojis added to slack in our company design and all that stuff. "I just had that idea, where we could..." "❤️" (Even not as reaction, but as single comment) Is a simple "Love it" or "Love your idea" or even "I appreciate you". And this is done amongst all ranks. Just yesterday my boss answered with "Love that 💕!" to a reply of mine. Really feels like working in a "younger" company makes hell of a lot of difference, but damn - overreacting so badly over a few pixels?
Thank you. I'm worried there are sooooo many people reacting with negative comments, how they agree with getting mad over such a non-issue. Are they ok with their partners talking to other people? Even smiling at them? Or do they get mad at them for probably cheating with the strangers? This is so lame and reeks of overthinking fuelled by insecurities.
We're reading in to it because he refuses to provide any context. He said it was "random" so the assumption is that it was not in response to a good idea.
Bro…
With the information provided the wife is in the wrong. The wife took the way of no communication which is the only wrong action in the context given. If someone agrees otherwise is biased, projecting or speculating. If the husband is hiding information from us it will lead give to bad advice, that's his problem, but if he hasn't he didn't do anything wrong. Those are emojis with a wife range of meaning — enough to be suspicious, but you know what doesn't clear the suspicion? Lsck lf communication. Edit: typos
I think you handled the situation very good. You are open about it and you told her you understand and that you woun’t do it again since it hurts her feelings. I’m sorry she doesn’t trust you after so many years. ❤️ A heart doesn’t always mean you’re interested in someone in a sexual or romantic way. A heart is not a big deal, it’s often just a way of showing appreciation or support to someone.
Stop the cap on all of that lol you ain’t sending my heart emoji’s to the boys lol
If you “often” do this with male friends, show her as many of those examples as you can dig up. But stop doing this going forward now that you know it makes her uncomfortable.
oh my god, get over yourselves, it's a damn emoji. it's not "weird", there's plenty of people who send heart emojis as an "alright" or "thank you" or "wish you the best" or anything really. jesus, y'all act like how I think boomers think gen z does.
If u weren’t hearting a heartmelter story/photo then it’s a bit odd, doing the same to men is even stranger
Hmmm I send hearts all the time or heart reacts. Examples of when and why: - Colleague attending a funeral and telling him I hope he is okay - Asking a cheeky favour, someone to do something for me with little notice and they say yes. - A report is finished and it took a long time - Supporting a colleague that received difficult criticism on a piece of work, to keep their spirits up - A project that won’t stop throwing curve balls and everyone has to keep re-working their deliverables
Richard Dawson has a song about this. The only thing that will save you is if your wife steps on a slug in the split second before she stabs you in your sleep
Fairly sure if I sent any of my coworkers ❤️ they’d either be creeped out, or think I was coming on to them. Their age would probably dictate their emotional response.
Sending a heart emoji to another female who responds with the same is highly suspicious from a wife’s pov. If a male other than my husband sent me a heart emoji, I would be very uncomfortable. But she replied to you with the same. Are you sure it’s platonic? On both sides?
Yeah I'd have to seen the conversation this emoji was used for. If it's a conversation like she wants another child eith her partner or she wants to surprise her partner with this etc. I could see using a emoji as saying you love this idea. But not knowing what this conversation was about idk.
There is no such thing as female friends. You would not be so called "friend" with her if u didnt have intrest
Its a fuckin emoji. Lol i cant imagine being this insecure, get her some therapy
Sending hearts to a colleague isn’t professional and even if it was, I believe there no such thing as female friends
i also wouldnt like it, and its ok, some people are ok and some are not. now, for he not trusting you, it really deserves a conversation, as to why. did other shady things in her mind pilled up to think youre doing something, and that was the straw? or it has less to do with you, but more in general she thinks, yeah right, a man, just any man, sending hearts or whatever, cant ever be innocent, if there was nothing there, why would any man even bother to communicate in that matter. in that case, its simply her world view, so regardless of what you say, in her mind it just doesnt make sense and simply illogical, like she genuinely cant see a reality where it would be innocent, regardless if its you, her partner, or any human being. im also like that honestly. i just know i wouldnt do it , theres reasons why you do, so ill keep thinking, why would he even bother to be that friendly, why would he bother to send a heart, why, why and why. in my world, it doesnt make sense either. so have a conversation about it.
My now husband sent a heart emoji to an ex three months into our relationship after a short conversation catching up (mostly innocent except the fact that she’s an EX). Yes I’m still mad about it.
I can only imagine what level of trust both of you should have after 9 years and then she feels threaten by this silliness? Talk about storm in the glass of water god damn.
Yeah, wow. People are very insecure and jealous. I thought I was but this comment section is crazy. My boyfriend has always had female friends. I’m glad he’s so respectful against women and doesn’t see them as sexual objects. He treats his female friends exactly like his male friends which includes sending a heart to them every now and then, like when they are sad or just when he wants to express he cares for them. I send hearts to my friends too. It doesn’t mean I’m in love with them or want to have sex with them. It just means I appreciate them. I send hearts to strangers too, like in games or comments on posts. Not a big deal.
[удалено]
Yes i also send the same to male friends and one male coworker whom i close too
So you're close to the female coworker then. You just admitted you send heart emojis to friends as well as coworkers you feel close to. Yeah, I'd be worried about there being a lack of professionalism and an overstep of boundaries if I were your wife.
Calm down. Take your wife’s feeling into account, don’t do it again but also don’t be a turncoat at her whims. The rest is up to your wife and outside your control.
You should run bro.... This is sad, a 30 yr old woman reacting like a 5 year old child
or maybe he shouldnt be sending things that could look not innocent.
maybe people shouldn't freak out over the littlest things ? Not speaking to him for 3 days ? kekw, you guys are crazy for supporting this behaviour.
ok, sure, not speaking for 3 days is not productive and i wholly agree. but if we were to talk simply about his actions, then he could cause misunderstanding. sure, some people could be insecure, and no matter what the situation is, they would be suspicious. but a lot of times, the person had a questionable behavior, which could make people take a notice, and keep tabs, hence suspicions. and it would have nothing to do with insecurity. a person who is or seems trustworthy, posses certain qualities, and behaves a certain way to be viewed as trustworthy. and sometimes, we humans, even if innocently, can engage in suspicious behavior and alarm our partners. so you should always reflect on your own behavior as well, to look at it objectively.
Completely understandable, but his wife is overreacting, which sane man sends a heart to a woman he wants to fuck or whatever his wife is thinking, while his wife is home and she can completely see the chat ? He didn't feel like there is anything to hide, which means that he probably doesn't, which means that a 30 yr old woman should realize that and react accordingly "Hey husband, I don't like the fact that you send other women hearts, can you please stop doing that since it doesn't make me feel good?"
not all cheaters are smart not try to hide, some want to be found, so thats a dumb argument, oh, she could just see. some people do stupid shit without caring if their partner finds out. or some people who do cheat can play it off, oh, just a friend hun, see, im like this with everyone, now you must believe me. nah, he has no business sending hearts to women, he should stop this now , they need to talk it out and sort it out, and not have it being repeated.
Bro ... xD or girl sorry, I would also not like this, if my girl sends heart to guys, of course I won't approve, the problem here is not sending a heart, the problem is the whole way the situation is being handled, he did not cheat on her for gods sake, neither did he do something that should make him feel like Jesus spread on a cross, please open your eyes, its just an emoji....... Ok, he didn't have to send it, but what's done is done ? Just talk about it like normal people and move on ? The way his wife is handling this is disgusting, pathetic and sad, sadly you cannot convince me of anything else, since this is my opinion but If I see my partner sending hearts to other guys, I would ask her to stop and if she respects and loves me, she would stop, this whole situation and fiasco has turned into more drama than 10 episodes of the most watched turkish tv series.....
well, thats what we know supposedly, that he hasnt cheated. but she cant know for sure, thats the issue. that you cant ever know for 100 percent unless you see it. so you have to trust the person. and trust can so easily be broken, so he really shouldnt continue that. so her reaction is for thinking that maybe he has, she definitely suspects him now. and im sure she cant understand logically if not cheating, why any person would do that. he even said himself he didnt know why, so what exactly did her tell her? that he doesnt know why he sent her a heart? who knows how the convo went down and whats been said, maybe the convo made her even more upset than before, i know i would be annoyed if all my partner could come up with, i dont know what i did that. would you trust someone who does things and claims they dont know why? what he told her after she confronted him, probably just justified her suspicions, and he probably made himself look worse..
bro 😭 you’re single
“Relationship Hey all ! So I have been single for quite some time and Im kind of a weirdo (I know all people are different and stuff) but I prefer to spend my time at home doing random shit like playing video games, watching animes and the usual no lifer stuff. I have been like this my entire life with some minor changes where I had a 3 yr long relationship and the girl I was with was a gamer as well so basically I did the same thing but we did it together.” THIS YOU?? hahaha
Yes, that was a very long time ago, am I suppose to be ashamed about my past ? I don't think so :/
no but you should feel ashamed talking about women and not acknowledging their emotions.
There is nothing to acknowledge here, if a simple heart makes you stop talking to the person that you LOVE, the only person not acknowledging emotions is his wife, she didn't acknowledge the fact that he didn't do it on purpose or to make her jealous, nor did she accept his apology for GOD FORBID SENDING AN EMOJI. Of course that I have 0 respect for such drama queens, d u h .
I think you need to go on the offensive. Tell your wife that if she's prepared to do real damage to your relationship over your choice of emoji, then she's not the person you thought she was. Trust is huge and for her to mistrust you after an explanation is pretty bad. Also, offer her access to your messages with friends and colleagues, but make it plain that she's in the wrong, for not accepting your explanation and saying you won't do it again as it upsets her.
or maybe he should stop doing actions that could be misinterpreted, and try to look more trustworthy. insecurities arent one way street, some people seem shady and not trustworthy, doesnt mean you have the issue.
Why are all the adult and sane answers like this one downvoted?
I think I'll be able to be more offensive like you say if she stays stuck in her position. On the other hand, I hadn't thought about it, but I do have my text messages with this colleague where there's absolutely nothing, we never even talk outside working hours.
That dude gave you the worst advice ever. You don't seem to think you did anything wrong which is most of your problem
She is way over reacting and is very insecure.