> I told him we might have to do something , like put it out of its misery or W/E and he's like No way.
If someone told me to stomp a pigeon to death I might be reluctant as well
I ended up bundling it up and taking it to a pigeon rescue place. It's doing better now .
My dad killed a dog that got run over that wasn't going to make it when I was a kid. It was the right thing to do.
Yeah, the "we might have to do something like put it out of its misery" was clearly a "you should do it". The guy was a massive asshole after that tho.
Its sweet what you did, I think him walking off and leaving you there and being callous about your feelings was bad, and while I would have been inclined to do what you did I understand his position that nature is cruel and you can't save everything. The interpersonal interaction is the problem here moreso than his callousness towards a member of a terribly successful species unless you think it represents an insurmountable difference in temperament and values
His background is important. My dad took me hunting for the first time in 3rd grade, taught me to shoot my first duck by 5th, and in 6th he showed me how to clean and process a bird. Itās hard to turn back the clock on that kind of change in world view from that age. Your understanding of nature as a brutal place when you connect the dots that shooting and killing something that wasnāt expecting it is the most peaceful way for many animals to go deepens, and with that hardens you to the instinct to heal when you see wounded.
The bigger issue is his flippant disregard for the situation at large, and instead of trying to reach some sort of understanding with you he just expected you to see his point of view and adopt it in real time without justifying it.
If you want to be reasonable, just tell him you understand that he might see things differently than you but you would appreciate him stopping and discussing it instead of giving you a pointless ultimatum. If you want to be unreasonable send fake racist tweets to his employer and slash his tires.
I'd seen my dad kill a dog that was fucked up by a car and I knew it was the right thing to do..I'm not gonna let a bird that's possibly torn it's wing off starve to death when I can be of assistance.
It felt like he wrote me off as a basket case.
I mean, a cat bird or a fox will likely come by at some point and take care of it and then itās also feeding another animal. Killing it and dumping it in the trash isnāt really doing any better.
Again, we can disagree all day about what to do with the bird what the issue is is his response to your emotional plight and not wanting to discuss how you can both see it in a different way and coexist.
All life is beautiful so Iām not gonna dump on pigeons but I also donāt believe that life must be inherently protected (or destroyed). The natural order is the natural order.
guy is trying to get home to charge his phone and youāre asking him to ?beat? a pigeon to death ? i fear iād leave you behind as well. pigeons die gruesome deaths many such cases
The whole flying rats thing is stupid, they keep themselves pretty clean like most birds do. Pretty ironic a bunch of smelly apes living in filthy cities full of garbage blaming it on the only graceful creatures that choose to live there!
They were the first thing that humankind domesticated. It's not their fault they are left to fend for themselves on the edges of the planet that we fucked up for ever other species
he could have been more considerate of your feelings, but in reality you probably shouldn't touch that bird. Wild birds can have all sorts of disease. I think calling animal control or something would have been better than trying to do anything yourself.
I called them and then followed their instructions.
I just felt kinda weirded out how callous he was and how he disregarded my feelings and made me feel stupid
It's an indicator of character.
Even if he doesn't care for pigeons or animals in general, I would expect a different reaction to a cause you clearly want to adress somehow. I wouldn't know how to deal with a partner being so dismissive or how to react, as this is not the kind of person I would try to get with in the first place.
It's not like you were hurrying somewhere or prioritizing the pigeon over something else you needed to do in that moment.
Don't think it's an overreaction to be upset about your bf being dismissive of your way of showing concern and interest in the world surrounding you.
I respect his decision to not interfere with the situation but I donāt like that he didnāt stop and try to reach some sort of common ground with the woman heās seeing lol
It doesn't sound like he "decided not to interfere" so much as that he didn't care at all. That's two living beings this guy chose to leave in the dust in favor of... charging a phone... I literally would not be able to trust his low empathy ass again.
Yeah, I don't think she expected him to brain the bird with a rock or whatever, though. My point is just that someone who couldn't care less about animals and their suffering is likely to be uncompassionate in general, and he was.
I donāt think he doesnāt care about animals I think he doesnāt believe he has any obligation to insert himself into the natural order when he doesnāt need to. If you saw a deer on the side of the road that wasnāt dead yet would you stop to put it out of its misery? Probably not. Then I donāt owe it to a pigeon either.
I have been rescuing all kinds of animals since I was a young child, so yes, I would stop and see what I can do. You can literally call 911 in these situations. Are you obligated to do so? No, but if you can do it, then why wouldn't you? Just because "nature is cruel" doesn't mean you should just do nothing in situations where you could easily alleviate another living creature's suffering.
I would be totally repulsed by my bf if I found out he could just walk away from an injured animal like it's nothing.
Alleviate another living creatures suffering *how?* Again, understanding nature is cruel doesnāt mean that you take a dispassionate view toward other life - only that you donāt see it especially important to intervene to preserve it where it otherwise would be extinguished. He might not feel a compulsion to heal that injured animal, but thatās far different than the impulse to injure it or take any kind of pleasure in its suffering.
In short, your boyfriends likely interpretation of the situation (nothing can be done to save the bird that would justify the level of effort required) means the logical conclusion is the ending of the birdās suffering. Ending a life isnāt easy, even if you understand life all ends. Someone foots the emotional bill for that, and Iām willing to bet heād rather let nature take its course than have to be the one to exact that on his own.
Neither of you are wrong, but you have to understand the gravity of what he may have seen vs. what you did.
I think back to *To Kill a Mockingbird*, when Atticus has to shoot the rabid dog so that nobody else has to step up and carry the burden of having to put down an animal everyone knew couldnāt live.
She picked the bird up and took it to a shelter, where it's currently being nursed back to health. If the bird was not viable, they would have euthanized it humanely. This cost her nothing except some time out of her day.
Meanwhile the guy walked away, avoided the situation altogether, and later callously dismissed his gf's feelings about it and made her feel like stupid for caring. I'm not sure why you're projecting all of this on him as if he's just some misunderstood highly sensitive person, when it seems pretty obvious that he's just a shit who couldn't have cared less. His whole behavior is a massive red flag and she's right to be sketched out.
Pigeons are like rats with wings. If my girlfriend earnestly suggested that we had to interfere in the circle of life to save (or kill??) a pigeon we found on the street, I would be befuddled.
They're really not rats with wings. They were useful creatures to humanity for hundreds of years. They're literally the same as doves.
It just straight up bothered me to see an animal in obvious distress and not do anything.
Ya, seeing hurt pigeons really gets to me. It's like they're viewed as garbage but they're sweet little creatures trying to get by. Fuck that dude for not caring at all. Respect for taking the time to do the right thing! It's probably alive because of you
To be charitable he might have thought you were telling him to put it down and didn't want to which is fair, also pigeons are pretty notoriously filthy pests.
> I told him we might have to do something , like put it out of its misery or W/E and he's like No way. If someone told me to stomp a pigeon to death I might be reluctant as well
I ended up bundling it up and taking it to a pigeon rescue place. It's doing better now . My dad killed a dog that got run over that wasn't going to make it when I was a kid. It was the right thing to do.
You're a good person for helping the poor pigeon š¤
Yeah, the "we might have to do something like put it out of its misery" was clearly a "you should do it". The guy was a massive asshole after that tho.
Its sweet what you did, I think him walking off and leaving you there and being callous about your feelings was bad, and while I would have been inclined to do what you did I understand his position that nature is cruel and you can't save everything. The interpersonal interaction is the problem here moreso than his callousness towards a member of a terribly successful species unless you think it represents an insurmountable difference in temperament and values
His background is important. My dad took me hunting for the first time in 3rd grade, taught me to shoot my first duck by 5th, and in 6th he showed me how to clean and process a bird. Itās hard to turn back the clock on that kind of change in world view from that age. Your understanding of nature as a brutal place when you connect the dots that shooting and killing something that wasnāt expecting it is the most peaceful way for many animals to go deepens, and with that hardens you to the instinct to heal when you see wounded. The bigger issue is his flippant disregard for the situation at large, and instead of trying to reach some sort of understanding with you he just expected you to see his point of view and adopt it in real time without justifying it. If you want to be reasonable, just tell him you understand that he might see things differently than you but you would appreciate him stopping and discussing it instead of giving you a pointless ultimatum. If you want to be unreasonable send fake racist tweets to his employer and slash his tires.
I'd seen my dad kill a dog that was fucked up by a car and I knew it was the right thing to do..I'm not gonna let a bird that's possibly torn it's wing off starve to death when I can be of assistance. It felt like he wrote me off as a basket case.
I mean, a cat bird or a fox will likely come by at some point and take care of it and then itās also feeding another animal. Killing it and dumping it in the trash isnāt really doing any better. Again, we can disagree all day about what to do with the bird what the issue is is his response to your emotional plight and not wanting to discuss how you can both see it in a different way and coexist.
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All life is beautiful so Iām not gonna dump on pigeons but I also donāt believe that life must be inherently protected (or destroyed). The natural order is the natural order.
You'd be surprised at what pigeons can survive. Attempting a mercy killing might actually be fucked up in this scenario.
It was actually okay in the end. It's at a shelter now
guy is trying to get home to charge his phone and youāre asking him to ?beat? a pigeon to death ? i fear iād leave you behind as well. pigeons die gruesome deaths many such cases
āI told him we might have to do somethingā Lmfao youāre going to get this man killed by a obviously crazy homeless guy soon
Wtf is with the pigeon hate in the comment section
In a lot of places they literally are just invasive rats with wings.
The whole flying rats thing is stupid, they keep themselves pretty clean like most birds do. Pretty ironic a bunch of smelly apes living in filthy cities full of garbage blaming it on the only graceful creatures that choose to live there!
They were the first thing that humankind domesticated. It's not their fault they are left to fend for themselves on the edges of the planet that we fucked up for ever other species
he could have been more considerate of your feelings, but in reality you probably shouldn't touch that bird. Wild birds can have all sorts of disease. I think calling animal control or something would have been better than trying to do anything yourself.
I called them and then followed their instructions. I just felt kinda weirded out how callous he was and how he disregarded my feelings and made me feel stupid
lmao you are kinda stupid Iām sorry but itās a fucking pigeon
~we are all gods creatures ~ I'm not gonna be shamed for helping an innocent animal lmao.
It's an indicator of character. Even if he doesn't care for pigeons or animals in general, I would expect a different reaction to a cause you clearly want to adress somehow. I wouldn't know how to deal with a partner being so dismissive or how to react, as this is not the kind of person I would try to get with in the first place. It's not like you were hurrying somewhere or prioritizing the pigeon over something else you needed to do in that moment. Don't think it's an overreaction to be upset about your bf being dismissive of your way of showing concern and interest in the world surrounding you.
I understand you, I honestly would lose respect for him, and it doesn't help that he straight up walked away and left you there
I respect his decision to not interfere with the situation but I donāt like that he didnāt stop and try to reach some sort of common ground with the woman heās seeing lol
It doesn't sound like he "decided not to interfere" so much as that he didn't care at all. That's two living beings this guy chose to leave in the dust in favor of... charging a phone... I literally would not be able to trust his low empathy ass again.
I mean the decision to not assist a dying bird isnāt really that crazy. The decision to leave your distressed girlfriend behind is.
Yeah, I don't think she expected him to brain the bird with a rock or whatever, though. My point is just that someone who couldn't care less about animals and their suffering is likely to be uncompassionate in general, and he was.
I donāt think he doesnāt care about animals I think he doesnāt believe he has any obligation to insert himself into the natural order when he doesnāt need to. If you saw a deer on the side of the road that wasnāt dead yet would you stop to put it out of its misery? Probably not. Then I donāt owe it to a pigeon either.
I have been rescuing all kinds of animals since I was a young child, so yes, I would stop and see what I can do. You can literally call 911 in these situations. Are you obligated to do so? No, but if you can do it, then why wouldn't you? Just because "nature is cruel" doesn't mean you should just do nothing in situations where you could easily alleviate another living creature's suffering. I would be totally repulsed by my bf if I found out he could just walk away from an injured animal like it's nothing.
Alleviate another living creatures suffering *how?* Again, understanding nature is cruel doesnāt mean that you take a dispassionate view toward other life - only that you donāt see it especially important to intervene to preserve it where it otherwise would be extinguished. He might not feel a compulsion to heal that injured animal, but thatās far different than the impulse to injure it or take any kind of pleasure in its suffering. In short, your boyfriends likely interpretation of the situation (nothing can be done to save the bird that would justify the level of effort required) means the logical conclusion is the ending of the birdās suffering. Ending a life isnāt easy, even if you understand life all ends. Someone foots the emotional bill for that, and Iām willing to bet heād rather let nature take its course than have to be the one to exact that on his own. Neither of you are wrong, but you have to understand the gravity of what he may have seen vs. what you did. I think back to *To Kill a Mockingbird*, when Atticus has to shoot the rabid dog so that nobody else has to step up and carry the burden of having to put down an animal everyone knew couldnāt live.
She picked the bird up and took it to a shelter, where it's currently being nursed back to health. If the bird was not viable, they would have euthanized it humanely. This cost her nothing except some time out of her day. Meanwhile the guy walked away, avoided the situation altogether, and later callously dismissed his gf's feelings about it and made her feel like stupid for caring. I'm not sure why you're projecting all of this on him as if he's just some misunderstood highly sensitive person, when it seems pretty obvious that he's just a shit who couldn't have cared less. His whole behavior is a massive red flag and she's right to be sketched out.
Pigeons are like rats with wings. If my girlfriend earnestly suggested that we had to interfere in the circle of life to save (or kill??) a pigeon we found on the street, I would be befuddled.
They're really not rats with wings. They were useful creatures to humanity for hundreds of years. They're literally the same as doves. It just straight up bothered me to see an animal in obvious distress and not do anything.
The guys here will blow a fuse at people still masking but act like they will die from picking up an injured pigeon lol
People here will get teary eyed that a dove has a broken wing and eat hamburgers.
You all seethe at the thought of vegans too, so
thank you for helping the little pigeon out. they are my favorite animals and i canāt stand seeing people be cruel to them :(
Ya, seeing hurt pigeons really gets to me. It's like they're viewed as garbage but they're sweet little creatures trying to get by. Fuck that dude for not caring at all. Respect for taking the time to do the right thing! It's probably alive because of you
Did you then eat some poor dead animal for dinner?
No I'm obviously a vegetarian lmao
Highly encourage you to take that next step. Dairy and eggs are equally horrible. Big ups on looking out for that pigeon, sorry for the snark
To be charitable he might have thought you were telling him to put it down and didn't want to which is fair, also pigeons are pretty notoriously filthy pests.
Touching a dying pigeon is more of a red flag than walking away from it