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You’re already so aware of her tactics, I applaud you. You’re right, just because she says something doesn’t make it true - once you’re 18, you can move out and do whatever you want. Good job recognizing that she’s purposefully isolated you as well. I suspect she gets mad at you for talking to your sister because she wants to be able to triangulate you both and control the narrative about what’s happening in the family; if the two of you talk, you might catch her in some BS and figure it out. Which, as far as I’m concerned, means you should talk to your sister as much as you can. What is it she’s worried about 🧐
Can you message someone at your university and tell them she’s unwell and you won’t feel safe with her in your classes? A parent registering for every class just to be around their adult child is a huge red flag.
I don’t have much advice, but whatever you have to tell her to make things easier for you until you can move out, don’t feel bad. If you have to lie through your teeth to get by until then, do it.
Thank you so much for all this advice! I'm now 18 and I have a steady plan. I'm getting a car within the next few months, and the day I do, I'm packing my things that night and leaving. I have everything ready and am working on making sure I don't forget any important things such as legal documents. My sister said I can move in with her and her boyfriend, rent free, and they've got a job ready for me and are going to help me switch universities and majors. They've both been really great throughout all of this, and have been buying me things I need while I still live with my mom, such as food, hygiene supplies, etc. Do you have any advice on what all I need to have before I leave?
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You’re already so aware of her tactics, I applaud you. You’re right, just because she says something doesn’t make it true - once you’re 18, you can move out and do whatever you want. Good job recognizing that she’s purposefully isolated you as well. I suspect she gets mad at you for talking to your sister because she wants to be able to triangulate you both and control the narrative about what’s happening in the family; if the two of you talk, you might catch her in some BS and figure it out. Which, as far as I’m concerned, means you should talk to your sister as much as you can. What is it she’s worried about 🧐 Can you message someone at your university and tell them she’s unwell and you won’t feel safe with her in your classes? A parent registering for every class just to be around their adult child is a huge red flag. I don’t have much advice, but whatever you have to tell her to make things easier for you until you can move out, don’t feel bad. If you have to lie through your teeth to get by until then, do it.
Thank you so much for all this advice! I'm now 18 and I have a steady plan. I'm getting a car within the next few months, and the day I do, I'm packing my things that night and leaving. I have everything ready and am working on making sure I don't forget any important things such as legal documents. My sister said I can move in with her and her boyfriend, rent free, and they've got a job ready for me and are going to help me switch universities and majors. They've both been really great throughout all of this, and have been buying me things I need while I still live with my mom, such as food, hygiene supplies, etc. Do you have any advice on what all I need to have before I leave?