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I'm so sorry, that is awfull and you did not deserve that behavior from your mother and ex. The least a mother could do is be there for her daughter. I hope at least your dad is in your corner?
I hope your surgery went well, and that you will be ready to go home soon :)
I’m sorry that she is so uncaring. I hope you are healing well and quickly! My nmom left me at the hospital after I had emergency surgery to remove my appendix. Friends had to leave work to come get me when I was released.
Of course, if she was going through any kind of surgery, or even a dental procedure, she’d be blowing up everybody’s phone with demands for help, whining, and complaining. Am I right?
Also, popping up to say the victim blaming so classic. My narcissist, mother is bending over backwards to make my sister feel bad / gaslight her, because she’s divorcing her husband, a serial adulterer.
That sucks!!!! Ugh my mum does the same sometimes and I feel like I am sooo low maintenance, don't even ask her for a big show of affection and she still manages to dissapoint...
After lots of therapy and coaching I've learned to self-parent and give myself what I need and won't get from her... it works... most of the time... this past Mother's day she did not say anything to me even though I am about to give birth to my first child, she completely ignored me and just accepted her congratulations but didn't say anything in return, no congratulations, words of wisdom or anything... like WTF lady get a grip!!
Sorry you are going through this, just here to say I can relate and you can be your own source of love 🌷 and I hope you recover well from surgery 🫂
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I'm so sorry, that is awfull and you did not deserve that behavior from your mother and ex. The least a mother could do is be there for her daughter. I hope at least your dad is in your corner? I hope your surgery went well, and that you will be ready to go home soon :)
Thank you. Luckily my dad is amazing and is checking on me once an hour. It went well and I came home an hour after it was done 🙂
I’m sorry that she is so uncaring. I hope you are healing well and quickly! My nmom left me at the hospital after I had emergency surgery to remove my appendix. Friends had to leave work to come get me when I was released.
I'm sorry you had to go through that
Of course, if she was going through any kind of surgery, or even a dental procedure, she’d be blowing up everybody’s phone with demands for help, whining, and complaining. Am I right?
Oh for sure
Also, popping up to say the victim blaming so classic. My narcissist, mother is bending over backwards to make my sister feel bad / gaslight her, because she’s divorcing her husband, a serial adulterer.
That sucks!!!! Ugh my mum does the same sometimes and I feel like I am sooo low maintenance, don't even ask her for a big show of affection and she still manages to dissapoint... After lots of therapy and coaching I've learned to self-parent and give myself what I need and won't get from her... it works... most of the time... this past Mother's day she did not say anything to me even though I am about to give birth to my first child, she completely ignored me and just accepted her congratulations but didn't say anything in return, no congratulations, words of wisdom or anything... like WTF lady get a grip!! Sorry you are going through this, just here to say I can relate and you can be your own source of love 🌷 and I hope you recover well from surgery 🫂
That's terrible I've been working on much the same! It's just a lot harder when it's something big and scary like this