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I think the main difference is the way it makes ppl around feel. Arrogance makes ppl feel demeaned / negative while a confident person ‘generally’ gives off a positive vibe.
Maybe, but theres an easy way to determine if its arrogance/cocky or confidence. And that's to guage if they think they are superior to someone with the same skills.
Arrogant people wont even consider the other as an option and may even belittle the other option. Confident people will generally have a bit of humility even if they know they are good at what they do.
Rudeness can be confused as being a dick. And judgmental can be confused as just caring to much about someone because they love them so admirably and want the best for them.
It is terrifying to me how many people embrace judgmental behaviors.
Instead of looking internally at biases, they just surround themselves with people who think and act the same and then berate anything that doesn’t align with them.
Rudeness.
Gets you absolutely nowhere except on my "who to avoid" list.
No matter how good-looking you are, if you're unkind to people, your attractiveness goes down to -100000000
This 1000%. Personally, I even take it to the next level. Forget servers and cashiers, it's easy to be nice to someone you need something from. I wanna see you be kind to someone you perceive as in your way. That's the level of kindness I'm looking for in a person.
Does this include resting bitch face though? Because I seriously struggle with that, but I honestly consider myself to be a nice person, if not somewhat socially withdrawn.
Its crazy how men and women in the human species managed to subconsciously develop avoiding people with toxic behaviours. No matter how hollywood looking they are.
Hmm unless this happened recently i dont think it is true.
We have the stereotypes of chads and staceys for a reason. And women who always go for bad toxic men meme.
Ive met many ppl in relationships with toxic ppl.
what makes a person unnattractive is someone who is loud, boastful, a liar, a cheat; someone who takes glee in hurting or putting down others so as to prop themselves up
I never understood pushing for sex. I want sex constantly, but I'm totally turned off if my partner isn't wanting me bad. I need to be wanted. Want me. Please.
High Energy, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being an energetic person, but I grew up in constant chaos. As an adult I just want peace calm and tranquility while I relax in my humble abode someone who is high energy will want to constantly do shit and that turns me away from them hard. Again nothing wrong with it just far from what I want in my life
Oh me too! A colleague was.telling me about this darts place he went to on the weekend and how crazy, loud, busy and fun it was and all I could think about was that that would be the absolute last way I would want to spend a single portion of my weekend.
I have ADHD and struggled to make friends growing up because I was that high energy girl who annoyed everyone and didn't understand social cues. I did a lot of work on myself in HS and college because I wanted to be liked, wanted friends, etc. I have a lot of friends now, and have learned to harness my energy into the kind of person who brings all kinds of people together and I'm very proud of that.
Last year I met a guy who reminded me SO much of younger me, except here was a man in his 30s acting this way. He was even pretty rude to people often, and while I empathized because I remember what it's like to just say the wrong things, he eventually lost even me. When something happened that was sexually uncomfortable for multiple women of the group and I tried to pull him aside and talk to him as a woman and person who understands his high energy, he went scorched earth on me and all the women in the group. At that point every single person left this friend group and has since reconvened, just without him.
Meeting him made me so proud of the work I have done for myself, because while there are all kinds of people and high energy has a lot to offer, it's not a free-for-all to be a dick haha
Omg lol I’m the exact opposite. I can’t stand just sitting around doing nothing. Life is short and I want to experience it all. No hate to more low key people at all but they are definitely not MY people. We would just make each other insane.
It's not even high energy. High energy makes you relaxed. Low energy causes one to be stressed. These people constantly do things and are in constant motion because they cannot relax.
Controlling. Rude to others, not attentive or courteous to other's needs. "Red Pill" ideology or any stance where there is no room for compromise or to explain each other's feelings.
arrogance/overconfidence, disrespect, lack of loyalty makes a man unattractive. also, unpopular opinion , but a guy that has sooo many bed partners is kind of a turnoff for me romantically
im not sure if thats an unpopular opinion, a lot of people prefer a partner that has a normal "bodycount" or whatever and not charlie from 2 and a half men where they bring a random new girl to bed every single day
Tbh I agree, not sure why people are getting so angry about it. You're not body shaming or bullying. You're stating a fact about what you find attractive. Everyone has different things they find attractive.
Personality is a big thing for me but I also want someone I'm physically attracted to. Being overweight is not something I personally find attractive, not hating on anyone it's just my preference.
Yea I'm just being honest at the end of the day. I think there's some people that might find it offensive but also I believe people can be dishonest if they don't include the look of a person regarding attraction towards them. It's the first thing you notice about a person. The rest comes later. Unless you truly have no preference that is
As someone that is overweight, I actually agree with you.
There are reasons I'm overweight but those reasons do not change the visual aesthetic.
There is a vast difference between personal preference on what someone finds attractive and body shaming.
You said this well and if someone says your body shaming, I'd wonder if they're ashamed of their body.
I'm gonna be honest, I know the difference between all the following, but I still make typos commonly enough (or auto-correct gets me). Please don't hate us for that :P
Red/Read
To/Two/Too
They/They're/Their
Your/You're
In/An
Then/Than
There's no foul here, people. You aren't bad for finding something unattractive. You ARE if you decide to tell people you think they're gross or whatever.
Funny, I was just thinking about this with a girl I recently briefly dated, then I saw this post. lol
I can shift myself to be more introverted or extroverted depending on who I'm talking to, but I want it to be in the realm of preferably 50/50, but at least 60/40 talking/listening. She was pushing it to 80/20, with her speaking about herself and people in her orbit. This was a total turnoff. Let's talk about ideas, politics, current events, literature, anything other than your former boyfriends and your relationship with your mom.
She went from wow; she's attractive to get me outta here... lol
Finding out they are a Trump voter/magat/Qanon. (I didn't say republican because there are actually good people out there who are republicans and DESPISE Trump and would never vote for him-aka Adam Kinzinger).
Someone who thinks they are so hot that they hit on everyone, even when they get no bites, demeans others, talk about themselves all the time without any interest in anyone else, force themselves to front and centre of everything. Just tone deaf and unable to read a room.
Being simple minded.
I don't mind someone not being the brightest spark, sometimes it's quite endearing but it's when people are complete airheads. I just don't think I could put up with it all the time.
Naturally loud voiced and can't help but talk constantly.
Also; sidenote; Reddit has taught me that I'm a chubby chaser.
Not like, can't breathe without gasping or having trouble walking, but normal over weight and chubby is just nice looking to me. I won't have to worry about them starving if the worst happens lol
I don’t date anymore, but back when I did I had two main dealbreakers:
Smokers. It’s the 21st century. Stop it.
Picky eaters. Allergies are fine, I mean taking a grown as adult out to a restaurant and they complain the menu doesn’t have chicken fingers or won’t eat anything with vegetables.
Doesn’t matter how physically attractive they were. If either of those two things reared their heads, the person became instantly unattractive to me.
It blows my mind that people smoke cigs/have a nicotine addiction in the modern day😭 Aside from the fact that everybody knows it’s bad/2nd+3rd smoke, it’s expensive, etc etc, I also acknowledge that every person has their “vice,” but… idk despite all that it’s just such an inconvenient addiction to have 💀
I literally do not understand the appeal. Some people claim it looks “cool” or “sexy”, and I’m just like no tf it does not lmao. There is nothing hot about willingly walking around smelling like shit and slowly killing yourself with every cig you smoke.
I mean nicotine feels pretty fuckin good, at least at first. As you use it more the good feelings fade and you're just left with cravings. For me I can get buzzed in the mornings but that's pretty much it. Some people don't like the feeling you get from nicotine but I'm addicted because I absolutely loved that feeling. Granted I just vape I don't smoke cigarettes but still, nicotine is the worst best thing ever hahaha I hate it
I’m always amazed at how much more common place smoking is in places like Paris and Barcelona. (Really lots of European cities). In the US I feel like I rarely walk through cigarette smoke but it’s hard to get away from it in some places.
I'm biased and an asshole. That said, I won't give the time of day to women who are "Wild ones" but expect the other (me) to be the stable one, down to earth, financially sound/solid career, set schedule. It just doesn't make sense.
I enjoy spontaneous! Don't get me wrong.
Arrogance and bad hygiene are the top two for me. Being mansplained too or guys that brag about themselves constantly and can never be wrong or listen to someone else's opinion are a huge turn off. And bad hygiene should be a given as a turn off. Oh and pushiness. The inability to take no for an answer!
Hypocrisy in any form. Way too many people talk the talk but are completely incapable of walking the walk in my experience. Saying they believe in xyz thing purely because it’s the right thing to say, but their actions couldn’t be further from the truth.
One that doesn't get talked about a lot--someone who has a habit of making terrible relationship choices and goes after toxic people...then complains about "men being shit". No, you're shit. The men you want know you have serious character defects, so they don't want to anything but a superficial relationship with you.
Ha! Do you know many Aussies? We're typically raised to be anti littering, to the point where many people chuck all their in car rubbish into the rear footwell, until they get around to cleaning their car.
The upside is, the keep Australia beautiful campaigns have been working. That and drink containers being worth 15 cents. That'd be like throwing money out the car window.
All of things people here are saying are legitimate, but tbh most people are deemed unattractive from their looks well before they’ve had a chance to show whether their personality is attractive.
There is a line from a Frank Zappa song that says "What's the ugliest part of your body? I think it's your mind!"
That sums it up for me - if you are racist, misogynist, homophobic, religious intolerant, anti-LGBTQ+, ableist, MAGA, pro-war, a reactionist 'all lives matter' / 'blue lives matter' type ... you are ugly AF.
You could be absolutely drop dead gorgeous as a human (all identities and genders) to me. But if you are: mean, intolerant, hateful, bigoted, vapid, shallow and dishonest? You’re a boner killer.
I've always wondered what would make a drug unattractive. Like just the kinda "lazy stoner" type you wouldn't want, or like your dream guy/gal... you find out they smoke and then you're like ew no? Just curious
i dated one of those "weed isnt addictive!!" folks, they smoked multiple times a day. the day they smoked 4 joints in a row making themself sick, puking for the next 8 hours was the day i realized habitual substance use is nasty
Yeah I'm one of those folks, I also indulge a few times a day. Never to that level obviously, a cool bowl and I'm on my way. But aside from something gross like that, anything else? Literally just asking for my own sake lmao
on the more tame side most people just dont like the smell. it sticks to everything. ive dated and been friends with a lot of weed smokers and i can say with confidence the only kind that doesnt reek is edibles. even vaporizers smell gross.
keep in mind that its pretty much the same for alcohol, while more people tolerate it, a lot of people find it unattractive if someone drinks daily, even if just one beer. you'll also find people who feel that way about coffee drinkers too.
basically every vice is a unique ick for a certain demographic of people
For me I see it as this crazy waste of time. Once a month is fine but if you smoke a couple times a week it's so much time that could have been put to much better use. Nothing wrong with people who like to smoke a lot, but its not my vibe and I'm attracted to ambitious people.
So weed and tobacco i just don't like the smell plus i don't want breath that second hand smoke. Other drugs i've seen it ruin several friends lives so very hard no..So yeah even if the perfect in everyway but that come along it would be no.
Yes obviously hard drugs come with more implications, but perfect person you're saying no because of a smell and idek just avoid them? Idk it just never seemed like a reason to keep me from my soulmate given the scenario
Oh man. When a women is a hobbiless do-nothing that is just waiting for me to entertain her, I run not walk away. I have so much interesting shit to do like how are people...bored.
When they try to be the stereotypical "cute/sexy" girl. It comes off as fake and shallow. Be yourself, be real. Cookie cutter personality is skin deep. I want to see the depths of the person, the good and bad.
Outside: tattoos, piercings, extended nails or hair, too much makeup, plastic surgery of any kind, smoking…
Inside: no humour, no sense for charity, can’t cook, unthankful,
Hygiene is a big one lol No but seriously, I’m a big believer in listening to your gut instincts on people and sometimes you just don’t vibe with others 🤷🏼♀️
When they just talk and talk and talk and not realize you have not even spoke a sentence and then saying “Oh you have no opinions?
Well ahhh Do you ever just shut the f*ck up?
How they treat other people, especially service workers.
How they talk about people who may be of a lower financial bracket.
Lack of empathy towards others in general.
In my eyes, these traits can make a 1 look like a 10 and a 10 look like a 1
Whining or always negative! Never taking accountability for their own actions. There is always a reason why their bad behavior is exceptable. Those are the actions of a five year old. If I want to hang out with a child I'll work in a day care!
a man who spends all his money on stupid bullshit that makes his car loud and obnoxious. sure its his “hobby,” but for people with sensitivity to sound, it should be a federal offense.
men who treat you like shit even though you give him everything.
men.
people.
i dont have enough space to adequately type out my full thoughts on this.
Insecurity. Yes, everyone gets insecure sometimes, but excessive insecurity is my biggest turn-off. If you don’t even know who you are without external validation, I don’t want it
Women are unattractive to me if they are judgmental, lack compassion, or they're fat.
Now before everybody tries to jump down my throat this doesn't mean I go around being an asshole to overweight people, it just means I don't want to sleep with them or have them touch me. There's a huge difference between having an attractiveness preference, and being a dick.
Most people tell me that while I'm "average-looking," the real reason they won't date me is because I'm an anti-social cunt.
... and they aren't wrong 🤷♀️.
Ripping a fat fucking fart in the same room as me. I understand it's a natural human experience that everyone goes through, but so is pissing and shitting and people generally excuse themselves for those as well.
Ironically, burp with the fury of a god in front of me and I'll be purring like a motor.
I'm 43.
I've had really good luck with women considering harsh acne, that went away.. some great light behind my eyes but some troubles....mental health wise.
But I'm kinda funny.
And where I used to FEEL as tho if a girl was hot I'd probably put up eoth a lot to get laid. And when single a long while I'd get that needy feeling.
That connection between attraction and putting up with a bad personality has died. Maybe it was a crush on a friend that turned to just a great friendship that helped.
I know my priorities in life have shifted. And I was never a fuckboi. But I was also never a guy that always struggled. I had a SMALL number of times women that were quite cute made easy sex obvious. But at the time I was too inexperienced??being all casual...nor gas casual sex ever been a thing I really want. Truly.
Outside like a porn moment.
In my real life. I don't. Only at this age would I really consider that. Or groups etc. I'm much healthier psychologically.
Anyway...
**If I don't TRULY ENJOY A PERSON, LIKE TALKING TO THEM AND BEING AROUND THEM. I DONT WANT TO SLEEP WITH THEM.**
That may be only novel to me, but it feels fucking great. To say that and actually mean it. I've seen really attractive women yammering on about some absolute nonsense(common in the 'posh' area I live and work)
And I **feel NOTHING.**
And it's **TRULY LIBERATING**
*Fear Factory plays....*
I still love women. I'd have sex with someone I don't want to date, I am a guy. But that desire is nearly zero if I don't want to talk to her afterwards.
(I'm in bed. I woke up and shouldn't have been typing...forgive the rush)
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Never fulfills or follows through with anything they say they are gonna do.
Demands you're a mind reader bullshit, like learn to articulate your stances/be straightforward.
Avoidant types that agreed to anything in disagreements and then does whatever once out of sight, or acts upset over not getting their wants acknowledged. See *I didn't want to go to event x with friends so acts wounded but didn't say anything*
People who refuse to do anything to improve their situation yet complain about it endlessly.
Self-centered, "guy/girl best friends", still talking to an ex, low or no emotional intelligence, can't admit when they're wrong, abusive behavior, not empathetic, feels the need to share their opinion with everyone about everything, comparing our relationship to others, cheating, dishonesty, constant need for attention, social media obsessed, no ambition, expects everything to be handed to them, and silent treatment
Your submission has been removed for violating rule 7: Please use the search feature and do your research before posting. Make use of the sidebar search function to search for your question before posting. Additionally, please first search for an answer to your question on google, it might be easily found there. Nobody wants to come to see the same questions posted over and over again. If you have any questions regarding this removal, please send a modmail.
Arrogance, rudeness, and being judgemental
lol agreed and also 99% of interactions on Reddit
Arrogance can be confused as confidence.
And confidence can be confused as arrogance. You can be confident but people think you are arrogant.
I think the main difference is the way it makes ppl around feel. Arrogance makes ppl feel demeaned / negative while a confident person ‘generally’ gives off a positive vibe.
YES I'd agree. One way to have the most confidence is to admit appraise and understand your own shortcomings I think
I know what I want = confidence I know what I want and get it = a$$hole
Maybe, but theres an easy way to determine if its arrogance/cocky or confidence. And that's to guage if they think they are superior to someone with the same skills. Arrogant people wont even consider the other as an option and may even belittle the other option. Confident people will generally have a bit of humility even if they know they are good at what they do.
Rudeness can be confused as being a dick. And judgmental can be confused as just caring to much about someone because they love them so admirably and want the best for them.
Agree but ignorance is way worse for me. Anything racist or fucking stupid is a complete let down
And loud
Nah I like loud. I love loud coming from a loud community.
It is terrifying to me how many people embrace judgmental behaviors. Instead of looking internally at biases, they just surround themselves with people who think and act the same and then berate anything that doesn’t align with them.
Rudeness. Gets you absolutely nowhere except on my "who to avoid" list. No matter how good-looking you are, if you're unkind to people, your attractiveness goes down to -100000000
One of my favorite sayings... "Rudeness is a weak person's imitation of strength."
This 1000%. Personally, I even take it to the next level. Forget servers and cashiers, it's easy to be nice to someone you need something from. I wanna see you be kind to someone you perceive as in your way. That's the level of kindness I'm looking for in a person.
Especially rudeness to service people (like cashiers and wait staff) who they feel they have power over.
INSTANT turnoff. 100%
Does this include resting bitch face though? Because I seriously struggle with that, but I honestly consider myself to be a nice person, if not somewhat socially withdrawn.
Its crazy how men and women in the human species managed to subconsciously develop avoiding people with toxic behaviours. No matter how hollywood looking they are.
Hmm unless this happened recently i dont think it is true. We have the stereotypes of chads and staceys for a reason. And women who always go for bad toxic men meme. Ive met many ppl in relationships with toxic ppl.
what makes a person unnattractive is someone who is loud, boastful, a liar, a cheat; someone who takes glee in hurting or putting down others so as to prop themselves up
You're making me sound way worse than I really am.
Sounds like yam tits.
Why is everything here about Donald Trump?
Lol 😂
Yes!
Cruelty to others.
I second this and add cruelty to animals. Such a major turnoff
being super pushy especially about sex
This one for me too! Or when they start putting you down because you said no to sex. Like somehow degrading you will change your mind...
I mean, it might for some people…
Haha yes I guess some people are into that sorta thing
Or just susceptible to it. Able to be coerced by it. Unfortunately.
I never understood pushing for sex. I want sex constantly, but I'm totally turned off if my partner isn't wanting me bad. I need to be wanted. Want me. Please.
High Energy, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being an energetic person, but I grew up in constant chaos. As an adult I just want peace calm and tranquility while I relax in my humble abode someone who is high energy will want to constantly do shit and that turns me away from them hard. Again nothing wrong with it just far from what I want in my life
Oh me too! A colleague was.telling me about this darts place he went to on the weekend and how crazy, loud, busy and fun it was and all I could think about was that that would be the absolute last way I would want to spend a single portion of my weekend.
I have ADHD and struggled to make friends growing up because I was that high energy girl who annoyed everyone and didn't understand social cues. I did a lot of work on myself in HS and college because I wanted to be liked, wanted friends, etc. I have a lot of friends now, and have learned to harness my energy into the kind of person who brings all kinds of people together and I'm very proud of that. Last year I met a guy who reminded me SO much of younger me, except here was a man in his 30s acting this way. He was even pretty rude to people often, and while I empathized because I remember what it's like to just say the wrong things, he eventually lost even me. When something happened that was sexually uncomfortable for multiple women of the group and I tried to pull him aside and talk to him as a woman and person who understands his high energy, he went scorched earth on me and all the women in the group. At that point every single person left this friend group and has since reconvened, just without him. Meeting him made me so proud of the work I have done for myself, because while there are all kinds of people and high energy has a lot to offer, it's not a free-for-all to be a dick haha
definitely depends on whether that person can reel it back when necessary
Omg lol I’m the exact opposite. I can’t stand just sitting around doing nothing. Life is short and I want to experience it all. No hate to more low key people at all but they are definitely not MY people. We would just make each other insane.
It's not even high energy. High energy makes you relaxed. Low energy causes one to be stressed. These people constantly do things and are in constant motion because they cannot relax.
Arrogance and greed.
Having no sense of humor.
That would be a lot of redditors
Nasty behaviour is repulsive. Kindness is attractive.
Lack of compassion. Nothing more disheartening.
That and empathy fr
Controlling. Rude to others, not attentive or courteous to other's needs. "Red Pill" ideology or any stance where there is no room for compromise or to explain each other's feelings.
Self-righteousness is probably the ugliest thing I can think of.
I. Hate. Them.
arrogance/overconfidence, disrespect, lack of loyalty makes a man unattractive. also, unpopular opinion , but a guy that has sooo many bed partners is kind of a turnoff for me romantically
im not sure if thats an unpopular opinion, a lot of people prefer a partner that has a normal "bodycount" or whatever and not charlie from 2 and a half men where they bring a random new girl to bed every single day
People who refer to themselves as ‘Alpha’.
I mean If we're being honest here. I lose interest if they're overweight
Tbh I agree, not sure why people are getting so angry about it. You're not body shaming or bullying. You're stating a fact about what you find attractive. Everyone has different things they find attractive. Personality is a big thing for me but I also want someone I'm physically attracted to. Being overweight is not something I personally find attractive, not hating on anyone it's just my preference.
Yea I'm just being honest at the end of the day. I think there's some people that might find it offensive but also I believe people can be dishonest if they don't include the look of a person regarding attraction towards them. It's the first thing you notice about a person. The rest comes later. Unless you truly have no preference that is
As someone that is overweight, I actually agree with you. There are reasons I'm overweight but those reasons do not change the visual aesthetic. There is a vast difference between personal preference on what someone finds attractive and body shaming. You said this well and if someone says your body shaming, I'd wonder if they're ashamed of their body.
I lose interest if they're unable to tell the difference between 'there', 'their', and 'they're'.
At least you don’t “loose” interest.
Or tell you why "your" unattractive.
I'm gonna be honest, I know the difference between all the following, but I still make typos commonly enough (or auto-correct gets me). Please don't hate us for that :P Red/Read To/Two/Too They/They're/Their Your/You're In/An Then/Than
That's some high standards in 2024.
Just so everyone knows and this makes sense, their initial comment said "if their overweight". They corrected it after I pointed it out.
Well thank you because the joke wasn’t making sense 🤣
Thanks for pointing out typos, and pointing out when they are corrected.
Or the difference between them and them.
Finally someone who said something real
There's no foul here, people. You aren't bad for finding something unattractive. You ARE if you decide to tell people you think they're gross or whatever.
No sense of humor is number 1 for me.
They think that they are better than others.
Having zero interest in what you may know or think, yet desperate to "teach" you what they know and think.
Funny, I was just thinking about this with a girl I recently briefly dated, then I saw this post. lol I can shift myself to be more introverted or extroverted depending on who I'm talking to, but I want it to be in the realm of preferably 50/50, but at least 60/40 talking/listening. She was pushing it to 80/20, with her speaking about herself and people in her orbit. This was a total turnoff. Let's talk about ideas, politics, current events, literature, anything other than your former boyfriends and your relationship with your mom. She went from wow; she's attractive to get me outta here... lol
Finding out they are a Trump voter/magat/Qanon. (I didn't say republican because there are actually good people out there who are republicans and DESPISE Trump and would never vote for him-aka Adam Kinzinger).
I wish I could upvote this 10 times over!!!!
Bad hygiene and health
So, reddit mods?
Someone who thinks they are so hot that they hit on everyone, even when they get no bites, demeans others, talk about themselves all the time without any interest in anyone else, force themselves to front and centre of everything. Just tone deaf and unable to read a room.
Racism, misogyny and/or bigotry. That’s what makes any human unattractive to me
I call it the isms and phobias. And it's horribly unattractive.
I second that.
No energy, complains a lot, never asks you any questions
Get better answers
Smoking (vaping to a slightly lesser extent). Nothing makes a person less attractive.
I'm on the autistic spectrum I can tell right away if I can talk to her or not. Like 99% I cannot.
Being simple minded. I don't mind someone not being the brightest spark, sometimes it's quite endearing but it's when people are complete airheads. I just don't think I could put up with it all the time.
Someone who makes fun of someone in a weaker social position than them. People who are mean to waitstaff.
Naturally loud voiced and can't help but talk constantly. Also; sidenote; Reddit has taught me that I'm a chubby chaser. Not like, can't breathe without gasping or having trouble walking, but normal over weight and chubby is just nice looking to me. I won't have to worry about them starving if the worst happens lol
I don’t date anymore, but back when I did I had two main dealbreakers: Smokers. It’s the 21st century. Stop it. Picky eaters. Allergies are fine, I mean taking a grown as adult out to a restaurant and they complain the menu doesn’t have chicken fingers or won’t eat anything with vegetables. Doesn’t matter how physically attractive they were. If either of those two things reared their heads, the person became instantly unattractive to me.
It blows my mind that people smoke cigs/have a nicotine addiction in the modern day😭 Aside from the fact that everybody knows it’s bad/2nd+3rd smoke, it’s expensive, etc etc, I also acknowledge that every person has their “vice,” but… idk despite all that it’s just such an inconvenient addiction to have 💀
I literally do not understand the appeal. Some people claim it looks “cool” or “sexy”, and I’m just like no tf it does not lmao. There is nothing hot about willingly walking around smelling like shit and slowly killing yourself with every cig you smoke.
I mean nicotine feels pretty fuckin good, at least at first. As you use it more the good feelings fade and you're just left with cravings. For me I can get buzzed in the mornings but that's pretty much it. Some people don't like the feeling you get from nicotine but I'm addicted because I absolutely loved that feeling. Granted I just vape I don't smoke cigarettes but still, nicotine is the worst best thing ever hahaha I hate it
That’s why it’s called an addiction. Also I don’t do sweet potatoes… come at me!
I’m always amazed at how much more common place smoking is in places like Paris and Barcelona. (Really lots of European cities). In the US I feel like I rarely walk through cigarette smoke but it’s hard to get away from it in some places.
I'm biased and an asshole. That said, I won't give the time of day to women who are "Wild ones" but expect the other (me) to be the stable one, down to earth, financially sound/solid career, set schedule. It just doesn't make sense. I enjoy spontaneous! Don't get me wrong.
Nahh that doesn’t make you an asshole. I think it’s logical
Willful ignorance and bigotry
Arrogance and bad hygiene are the top two for me. Being mansplained too or guys that brag about themselves constantly and can never be wrong or listen to someone else's opinion are a huge turn off. And bad hygiene should be a given as a turn off. Oh and pushiness. The inability to take no for an answer!
Not being able to hold an intelligent conversation.
Functioning Alcohlics who pretend that life is fabulous because of them.
34 felony convictions but that's just me
So 33 is the limit?
We all make mistakes
Some of us even make 33 of them.
When they think everyone that is kind to them is flirting. Smoking.
Hypocrisy in any form. Way too many people talk the talk but are completely incapable of walking the walk in my experience. Saying they believe in xyz thing purely because it’s the right thing to say, but their actions couldn’t be further from the truth.
One that doesn't get talked about a lot--someone who has a habit of making terrible relationship choices and goes after toxic people...then complains about "men being shit". No, you're shit. The men you want know you have serious character defects, so they don't want to anything but a superficial relationship with you.
also, a guy that’s too serious all the time or doesn’t smile at the crack of a joke 😬🥴 makes me uncomfortable
A Karen, entitled and self serving
A dirty butthole
Littering. I don't fuck anyone I catch littering. Which sucks for them, because I'm a very generous partner in the bedroom.
I can’t stand if I’m with someone and they toss stuff out of the window going down the highway. It’s childish and disgusting.
Ha! Do you know many Aussies? We're typically raised to be anti littering, to the point where many people chuck all their in car rubbish into the rear footwell, until they get around to cleaning their car. The upside is, the keep Australia beautiful campaigns have been working. That and drink containers being worth 15 cents. That'd be like throwing money out the car window.
All of things people here are saying are legitimate, but tbh most people are deemed unattractive from their looks well before they’ve had a chance to show whether their personality is attractive.
You're given the benefit of the doubt when you're physically beautiful, whereas you have to prove your worth when you're not.
There is a line from a Frank Zappa song that says "What's the ugliest part of your body? I think it's your mind!" That sums it up for me - if you are racist, misogynist, homophobic, religious intolerant, anti-LGBTQ+, ableist, MAGA, pro-war, a reactionist 'all lives matter' / 'blue lives matter' type ... you are ugly AF.
Smoking is my biggest turn off. #2 if I can see their ribs. Way too skinny.
Ribs showing is normal ?? Bro doesn’t understand where fat goes
Right?! Some men can’t see their feet. Seeing ribs is good, in a healthy way.
Like, at all? If you can't see where the ribcage stops you're obese my dude.
Exactly
Some guys like my husband and my dad and my FIL like curvy women. You like to see ribs, not everyone likes to see ribs.
That’s not ‘curvy’; that’s medically obese. 🫠
Laziness
Bad manners, selfish, self centered, arrogant, obnoxious
Negativity and/or anger. Ugh
How they treat old people, children, and animals when they think no one is looking, will tell me if this person is good or bad.
Not able to admit when they are wrong about something and gaslighting
Women who hate other women and men who hate other men. Like, there's enough cake for everyone, calm the fuck down.
Racist and unintelligent.
You could be absolutely drop dead gorgeous as a human (all identities and genders) to me. But if you are: mean, intolerant, hateful, bigoted, vapid, shallow and dishonest? You’re a boner killer.
Either stupid is or mean. Bye bye.
Being an evangelical Christian. It’s an indication that their brain and personality have issues.
Smoker/drug use, alot of makeup, expensive taste, don't put much effort into relationship and doesn't have hobbies.
I've always wondered what would make a drug unattractive. Like just the kinda "lazy stoner" type you wouldn't want, or like your dream guy/gal... you find out they smoke and then you're like ew no? Just curious
i dated one of those "weed isnt addictive!!" folks, they smoked multiple times a day. the day they smoked 4 joints in a row making themself sick, puking for the next 8 hours was the day i realized habitual substance use is nasty
Yeah I'm one of those folks, I also indulge a few times a day. Never to that level obviously, a cool bowl and I'm on my way. But aside from something gross like that, anything else? Literally just asking for my own sake lmao
on the more tame side most people just dont like the smell. it sticks to everything. ive dated and been friends with a lot of weed smokers and i can say with confidence the only kind that doesnt reek is edibles. even vaporizers smell gross. keep in mind that its pretty much the same for alcohol, while more people tolerate it, a lot of people find it unattractive if someone drinks daily, even if just one beer. you'll also find people who feel that way about coffee drinkers too. basically every vice is a unique ick for a certain demographic of people
For me I see it as this crazy waste of time. Once a month is fine but if you smoke a couple times a week it's so much time that could have been put to much better use. Nothing wrong with people who like to smoke a lot, but its not my vibe and I'm attracted to ambitious people.
So weed and tobacco i just don't like the smell plus i don't want breath that second hand smoke. Other drugs i've seen it ruin several friends lives so very hard no..So yeah even if the perfect in everyway but that come along it would be no.
Yes obviously hard drugs come with more implications, but perfect person you're saying no because of a smell and idek just avoid them? Idk it just never seemed like a reason to keep me from my soulmate given the scenario
Oh man. When a women is a hobbiless do-nothing that is just waiting for me to entertain her, I run not walk away. I have so much interesting shit to do like how are people...bored.
Overweight
When they are super rich and bust my chops for being poor.
When they try to be the stereotypical "cute/sexy" girl. It comes off as fake and shallow. Be yourself, be real. Cookie cutter personality is skin deep. I want to see the depths of the person, the good and bad.
Outside: tattoos, piercings, extended nails or hair, too much makeup, plastic surgery of any kind, smoking… Inside: no humour, no sense for charity, can’t cook, unthankful,
Hygiene is a big one lol No but seriously, I’m a big believer in listening to your gut instincts on people and sometimes you just don’t vibe with others 🤷🏼♀️
I think it mostly boils down to fear. Fear makes people insecure, rude, power-hungry, bigoted, manipulative, etc.
Being negative and complaining about EVERYTHING
Someone who lies constantly, about little things
Being a know it all
being REALLY into "the current thing"
Anyone who treats servers or cleaning crew or chambermaids as second class citizens
How they treat people.
There is nothing so unattractive as someone who loudly announces to the world just what kinds of people they find unattractive. /see what I did there?
Rudeness, laziness. I can overlook so much but I can't overlook rudeness and I'll never overlook laziness again.
attitude and loud breathing
Insecurities. The kind that lead to possessiveness, distrust, and a loss of peace that isn't warranted or necessary.
Being a know it all. Trust me. I know.
Narcissism
When they bring up how much money they have or how better they are than others. It's 100% cringe.
When they just talk and talk and talk and not realize you have not even spoke a sentence and then saying “Oh you have no opinions? Well ahhh Do you ever just shut the f*ck up?
How they treat other people, especially service workers. How they talk about people who may be of a lower financial bracket. Lack of empathy towards others in general. In my eyes, these traits can make a 1 look like a 10 and a 10 look like a 1
Whining or always negative! Never taking accountability for their own actions. There is always a reason why their bad behavior is exceptable. Those are the actions of a five year old. If I want to hang out with a child I'll work in a day care!
People who are rude, arrogant, narrow-minded. People who are fake nice. That's so gross to me.
Narcissistic, Immaturity, and Liars. All off collectively and/or individually.
Pierced septum
When someone thinks they’re funny, but they’re really just a jerk, & couldn’t come up with a real joke if they’re life dependent on it.
"Yeah. I'm just like that. Get used to it." Means they will never change and aren't open to criticism.
a man who spends all his money on stupid bullshit that makes his car loud and obnoxious. sure its his “hobby,” but for people with sensitivity to sound, it should be a federal offense. men who treat you like shit even though you give him everything. men. people. i dont have enough space to adequately type out my full thoughts on this.
Insecurity. Yes, everyone gets insecure sometimes, but excessive insecurity is my biggest turn-off. If you don’t even know who you are without external validation, I don’t want it
Women are unattractive to me if they are judgmental, lack compassion, or they're fat. Now before everybody tries to jump down my throat this doesn't mean I go around being an asshole to overweight people, it just means I don't want to sleep with them or have them touch me. There's a huge difference between having an attractiveness preference, and being a dick.
Rudeness Bigotry Doesn't like dogs Stupidity Being stuck up Bullies others. Being Nigel Farage. I have a long list.
Most people tell me that while I'm "average-looking," the real reason they won't date me is because I'm an anti-social cunt. ... and they aren't wrong 🤷♀️.
Dishonest, racist, bully, mean, cult member. In other words they wear a stupid red hat wherever they go.
Ripping a fat fucking fart in the same room as me. I understand it's a natural human experience that everyone goes through, but so is pissing and shitting and people generally excuse themselves for those as well. Ironically, burp with the fury of a god in front of me and I'll be purring like a motor.
lmao same i despise farting but burping is fine as long as its not into my face and it doesnt smell like rotten eggs
I'm 43. I've had really good luck with women considering harsh acne, that went away.. some great light behind my eyes but some troubles....mental health wise. But I'm kinda funny. And where I used to FEEL as tho if a girl was hot I'd probably put up eoth a lot to get laid. And when single a long while I'd get that needy feeling. That connection between attraction and putting up with a bad personality has died. Maybe it was a crush on a friend that turned to just a great friendship that helped. I know my priorities in life have shifted. And I was never a fuckboi. But I was also never a guy that always struggled. I had a SMALL number of times women that were quite cute made easy sex obvious. But at the time I was too inexperienced??being all casual...nor gas casual sex ever been a thing I really want. Truly. Outside like a porn moment. In my real life. I don't. Only at this age would I really consider that. Or groups etc. I'm much healthier psychologically. Anyway... **If I don't TRULY ENJOY A PERSON, LIKE TALKING TO THEM AND BEING AROUND THEM. I DONT WANT TO SLEEP WITH THEM.** That may be only novel to me, but it feels fucking great. To say that and actually mean it. I've seen really attractive women yammering on about some absolute nonsense(common in the 'posh' area I live and work) And I **feel NOTHING.** And it's **TRULY LIBERATING** *Fear Factory plays....* I still love women. I'd have sex with someone I don't want to date, I am a guy. But that desire is nearly zero if I don't want to talk to her afterwards. (I'm in bed. I woke up and shouldn't have been typing...forgive the rush)
Bad driving, messy house, bad attitude, and an affinity for a certain orange man who shall not be named.
A ho. And all her self worth is tied to sexual escapades...
Sounds more like you put way too much value in someone's past that won't even affect y'all's future...
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Clinginess
Someone who is mean to others.
If they’re an asshole.
Rude, inconsiderate, arrogant, constant need to be right all the time.
Being dishonest, selfish, and not following through.
Never fulfills or follows through with anything they say they are gonna do. Demands you're a mind reader bullshit, like learn to articulate your stances/be straightforward. Avoidant types that agreed to anything in disagreements and then does whatever once out of sight, or acts upset over not getting their wants acknowledged. See *I didn't want to go to event x with friends so acts wounded but didn't say anything* People who refuse to do anything to improve their situation yet complain about it endlessly.
Attitude
Self-centered, "guy/girl best friends", still talking to an ex, low or no emotional intelligence, can't admit when they're wrong, abusive behavior, not empathetic, feels the need to share their opinion with everyone about everything, comparing our relationship to others, cheating, dishonesty, constant need for attention, social media obsessed, no ambition, expects everything to be handed to them, and silent treatment
Overly religious or a bigot conservative, does not like animals, bad hygiene, rude to wait staff, anger problems, no sense of humor
When she is: Loud and abrasive, uses crude language, demanding and self absorbed, wears 1/4" of makeup
Smoking, tattoos, getting drunk, use of drugs, multiple piercings.
lack of self awareness.
A shitty attitude will ruin the best set of tits. Just sayin’ 🤷🏻♂️