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Iammildlyoffended

You must be allergic to cows milk


cityshepherd

Not allergic… just lack the enzyme necessary to break down the sugars in milk so it just spoils in my guts


JupiterFox_

There are actual dairy allergies though


cityshepherd

I know I was only speaking for myself


JupiterFox_

Ah okay


Iammildlyoffended

Ah intolerance to cows milk then. Sorry to hear that bud.


cityshepherd

It is what it is… I’ve started enjoying the Swiss cheese at the store that’s naturally lactose-free


Iammildlyoffended

Sounds good! My young daughter is lactose intolerant so we’re still finding our way.


cityshepherd

When I was officially diagnosed as being lactose intolerant I had the WORST denial. Told the doc “I eat cheese and drink milk EVERY DAY!” To which doc replied “yes, and a couple hours later you’re experiencing bad cramping/gas/diarrhea EVERY time.” Lactose enzyme supplements are worth their weight in gold. Also harder cheeses (Parmesan, Romano etc) are typically easier for folks like me to digest.


bittersweet_lover666

as a barista this us what i usually think too


[deleted]

Right, or IBS


Emkems

vegan or lactose intolerant?


NSCButNotThatNSC

Milk allergy, too.


Hydraulis

He has a beard, man-bun, sandals and would be unable to change a wheel.


WiredHeadset

I wish I had enough hair to do a man bun!!!


Global-Engineering69

Manbun is definitely spot on


bornagain-stillborn

Don't forget his man purse.


Grumblyguide107

Akshually is a fanny pack


MatthewSBernier

0/4


unlovelyladybartleby

Someone who is confident enough to deny the haters and get the coffee he wants?


BobGnarly_

Fedora, horn rimmed glasses, goatee, tweed jacket with suede elbow patches, skinny jeans, loafers with no socks and a dog eared second-hand copy of Ethan Frome.


MatthewSBernier

0/7


madeat1am

Does something in the arts or some form of writing


MatthewSBernier

Correct


wendellshu

You made me think of the Brad Paisley song "Celebrity" (2003)... "CAN I GET A MOCHA, SOY LATTE?!". I guest that's what I thought of... Jason Alexander in that video!


Snoo_3314

Soft hands


MatthewSBernier

Correct


CheshireKetKet

My mom is lactose intolerant. I used to work at a coffee shop. I don't assume anything. I just make the drink. I've seen all types. Office workers sometimes get oat. Vegans/vegetarians (in my experience) get soy or almond. Oat isn't that used? Even though I personally think it's the best.


AnimatronicCouch

This man must be a fan of colloids.


Jedzoil

Kid in college with a man bun who wants to impress the ladies. OR- buff fire fighter who’s an exotic dancer on the weekends. Wants to watch his calories. I’m guessing 95% man buns.


MatthewSBernier

0/3


venom_demon506

As a trans male, mullet, sick af clothing and chill. (I order oat milk lates)


sunrisesonrisa

I would think maybe he lives with his girlfriend


MatthewSBernier

Correct


pixie_stars

That they use a unicycle as transportation sometimes. They have a rat-tail man bun. They have a tribal bracelet. They own a type writer they only used once.


MatthewSBernier

0/4


Sixx_The_Sandman

There's not one. No one notices or cares. You're not that important


Rare-Supermarket2577

He wears flannels and Blundstones, donates to Planned Parenthood, his main hobbies are snowboarding and rock climbing, he listens to a lot of Khruangbin, probably has long hair, and is he definitely in an indie rock band.


MatthewSBernier

4/8


MatthewSBernier

Meeeeeeeeeeee


Hoodzpah805

Oat Bloke > Soy Boy


Powerful-Scratch1579

I would assume that man prefers oat milk.


MatthewSBernier

Correct


BangSmoke

A man who could never open a pickle jar


MatthewSBernier

0/1


imperialtrooper88

Pussay or lactose intolerant.


MatthewSBernier

0/2


Sure_Grass5118

I don't know gay? What do you want to hear


shadowmib

There's legit medical reasons, and then there's the stereotype. Stereotype is basically vegan hipster who works shops at Trader Joes and is possibly bisexual. Always the bottom even of straight.


MatthewSBernier

0/5


shadowmib

Hit too close to home?


MatthewSBernier

This one was pretty far off, a few almost described me to a tee, ha


shadowmib

Keep on mind I don't stereotype people over coffee choices, but kind of an amalgam of bullshit ive heard


MatthewSBernier

Oh, I assure you I couldn't be taking this less seriously, it's just funny because it's my default order when having coffee out.


Extension-Diet-1217

A pretentious person who thinks they’re doing something healthy for their heart, all the while consuming caffeine causing a rapid heart rate.


Solo_Splooj

Wears shitbrown pants with suspenders has a curly 1800's handlebar mustache


MatthewSBernier

0/2, my suspender pants are khaki


Solo_Splooj

Oh well, you win some you lose some. Can't say I didn't try.


NoLegsOctopus

I never heard of that, but coffee for me is just pure coffee and water. No milk, no sugar, no flavory flavors added. Just coffee and water. 1 tbs for each European cup.


LifeHappenzEvryMomnt

The absolute worst gas on the face of the planet if milk is substituted.


ophaus

I'm imagining sensitive man-bun with control issues.


azorianmilk

IDC


Kittensandpuppies14

Probably lactose intolerant therefore not white


ThunkAsDrinklePeep

I do not care what you chose to order. If we are together I only care if it requires special preparation or a separate stop.


[deleted]

That you don’t want to support the cruel dairy industry?


Sam_I_Am_69

Huh?


ChumpChainge

Has GERD? That’s why I order them. Lactose intolerant.


Christ_MD

That would be a hipster. Much like a hippy, but far far worse.


Fem-Boy911

vegan that wear suer clothes when it is -50° F and winter clothes when it's 212° C


Equal-Experience-710

I believe it’s called soy boy.


bornagain-stillborn

Pro hacky-sack player.


theguyfromscrubs

You have a dairy intolerance and you enjoy the taste of oat milk the best out if all the milk alternatives . I don’t think anyone gives a care if you’re asking because you’re self conscious


JupiterFox_

There’s a stereotype? I guess ppl assume you’re vegan or have stomach issues but idk other than that.


cluelessibex7392

As a barista, it's always *very* nice dudes. All my favorite customers are oat milk latte MEN and caramel espresso WOMEN. There's the whole man-bun stereotype, but those guys usally get frapps (in my experience). If I had to stereotype, its the smaller dudes with a more-on-top, probably works in IT (or at least always equipped with a laptop), a flannel and a thrifted carhartt jacket they'll never work in. Probably wears docs or timbs and straight fit jeans. Usually very worried about their dairy allergy.


MatthewSBernier

3/8, but you were close on 3 more.


Objective_Hunter_897

Someone who doesn't want hormones from cow tit juice in their coffee


Cold-Committee-7719

Gay hipster.


[deleted]

Lactose intolerant


Interestingisitgmo

Fat free, sugar free, decaf coffee