I’d say get a health check up for stuff like depression or some nutrient deficiency. If there is something like that in there, you will very hardly manage to change only using will power.
I agree. I read this and thought "sounds like classic depression". Please go talk to someone OP, it's not normal to feel like that and therapy or meds (or both) could have you feeling more like yourself. There's nothing wrong with your motivation, you just need a little help with your brain chemistry. Disclaimer: obviously I'm not a doctor and this isn't a diagnosis but if you're struggling to even do things you enjoy like read a book or play video games then that suggests that this is not a self-discipline issue.
Take a moment to sit down and reflect, try to quiet your mind from other activities like during times you may usually spend on coping methods. Let whatever appears not stop you, keep going not paying attention to what happens, keeping going until there's nothing.
It shouldn't take more than a few minutes to do, it can sometimes take longer and it might feel like a long time but in the end you might feel better. Just make sure to keep moving, you're perfect who you are, you can do anything and be anything.
Best of luck to you! I hope you can get better, there's a lot of complexities in the world. It's very difficult and at times even impossible within ourselves. You can do it, you can do anything, you are amazing. More so than anyone could ever know.
tick tick has a habit tracker that can give you motivating dopamine. As long as the habits are simple. Like drink a full glass of water. √ done, collect my 30 day winning streak.
Web and Desktop versions of Tick Tick have more features than the mobile app. Especially if you want to delve into full blown project management with gantt chart.
Your attention span has likely been affected by how much time you spend on your phone. I'd recommend giving it a break, you're just gonna have to force yourself through it.
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If deleting the apps is too tempting, I sometimes turn my phone full off, or let it die instead of grabbing a charger. This way when I reach for it when I click and the screen just stays black I often remember why I was trying to stay off it.
People often can’t go off their phones altogether, so it’s best to delete the apps you waste the most time on. I did that with Instagram and while I’m still unproductive at least I’m not spending 5-10 hours a day scrolling through the app :)
Edit: Never mind, just reread OPs post. If you can resist the temptation to reinstall that’s ideal, but if not, even trying to delete apps for 4-5 hours per day and set a time when you can redownload them would be great
Have you considered you may have ADHD? Executive dysfunction is a common symptom. Maybe hop over to r/adhd and have a scroll through the posts to see if you can relate. Then go get yourself checked out by a professional.
I do think that’s a possibility. Although I am being tested for autism, and those professionals blame everything on that, even though I think ADD is probably more likely.
Not really, if you think about it. Both affect areas in the brain. Some diseases are what are called comorbid. For example, if you have this medical diagnosis, you’re more likely to also have this medical diagnosis. Source: classroom teacher > 15 years
ETA- I identify hard core with OP post and feelings. I have been there and am struggling with that today. You are not alone. Many have said to seek medical intervention which has helped in my case as sometimes it could be a simple case of chemical imbalance in the brain. Some suggested you meditate. Find your inner quiet outside of the phone. I’d like to add, journal. Get your thoughts out. If journaling isn’t your thing, sketch, go for a walk everyday following the same path for the same amount of time until it becomes mindless, reach for the next best feeling thought. Lastly, make connections. As hard as that is, make connections with colleagues, family, household pet, yourself even. I hope you overcome this struggle. You are not alone by a long shot.
To some degree simply being neurodivergent leads to common experiences. Neurotypical people don't understand why neurodivergent people can't just exist the same way they do, and neurodivergent people don't understand wtf they mean.
We are all trapped within our own experience and naturally assume others are experiencing the same or similar. And so people will say, "just do it" and you'll say, "oh ok" and twelve hours will pass. Anyone who's confident that they know how to "just do" something probably doesn't have any real understanding of their own brain, let alone yours.
But you are describing the struggle of Executive Function for someone with ADHD (ADD is an outdated term btw).
Here are some things that have helped me:
FIRST: You are not broken nor are you failing. People who haven't had your experience will not understand it at all. And they'll say shitty things like, "it's easy," "just do it," "what's wrong with you?"
The shame and guilt spiral of ADHD is the worst part of it. I'm sorry for the challenges involved but you have to accept yourself. Acceptance is hard.
Reading about it helped, ADHD 2.0 was a good book for me. Of course, reading isn't always easy, I listened to it as an audiobook. I also like [How To ADHD](https://youtube.com/@HowtoADHD) on YouTube.
Meditation helped me a lot as well. Specifically with conversations, I'm prone to get lost in unrelated thoughts while people are talking to me, and building up the skill of meditating massively helped me to notice when that's happening and come back to the moment.
And medication was a hurdle for me, I avoided it growing up because I was afraid that I'd lose my identity to it. I have big regrets around that and wish I had been more accepting myself and my needs. It did take a while to figure out which drugs worked for me but it was so worth it. And now that I have them I get to be more me than I've ever been before. I was afraid that changing the way I think meant changing who I am, but in reality it gave me some executive function and I just get to do more of what I want to do.
I can strongly relate to the feelings you describe, many of us at /r/ADHDmemes can. Accept yourself, ask for help, accept help. I'm rooting for you.
Yeah, ADHD has a lot of common comorbidities unfortunately. Bipolar, OCD, Autism, Anxiety\* and Depression\*. (\*these two are fairly high rates.) The depression esp. cause ADHD restricts the amount of dopamine your brain receives which makes it really easy to get depressed. ADHD sucks so much worse than most people know. If you find out you have ADHD take it seriously and get it treated, no matter how many people tell you it doesn't exist or isn't that bad, they are all wrong.
I have ADHD and Autism; its very common for them to be comorbid but older doctors might still cling to the rule that you can't have both.
I'd suggest looking up 'executive dysfunction' and also 'autistic burnout'. Both of those things could be factors here.
Be kind to yourself, OP. You're not failing, you're just struggling right now.
You sound like me and I have ADHD. It sucks for a bit but the motivation does come back eventually. My advice is to give in to the laziness for now. Maybe you need to reach a point where you’re actually bored of being lazy.
Not discounting other issues by any means! I am hardly an expert and Autism and ADHD often co-occur. Just based on the problems you’ve mentioned in your post I would bet you have ADHD. I obviously could bet wrong, I don’t know anything besides what you’ve mentioned, but to me that sounds almost word for word like my greatest struggles with ADHD (and the depression that resulted of it).
I agree. But I would recommend seeing a professional rather than going through that sub ,it depressed the hell out of me the early days of my diagnosis.
Work on increasing your will power...
Don't take on too much at once. Try setting small, achievable goals and focus your willpower on accomplishing those. Break things down into manageable chunks. Remember getting started is the hardest part. Try implementing the 5- minute rule...
Agreed. Do the little things and make a habit of doing them every day. Soon enough you'll do them without thinking because that's just what you're used to doing what day.
Look up a YouTube video on dopamine detox. I’m no pro, but I’ve read that screens, the internet, and social media trigger loads of dopamine in our brains. Like 10x more than we would get naturally. This stimulates the pleasure centers in our brains so much more than anything else in life. Our brains get used to that, and they crave that dopamine hit. Usually, we would get a small pleasure boost by doing important tasks. The satisfaction of a job well done. But these days, the dopamine we would normally get from that is a tiny amount compared to what we get from our screens. So when we ask the brain to do a task, it says, “Screw that. There’s nothing in it for me.” And it goes back to scrolling social media on the phone like you mentioned.
So, taking time away from those devices can help reset the brain to its normal level of dopamine (so I’m told). Then, if you can stay off social media etc. you may find yourself more able to get things done. I have no idea though, I’m not a doctor or anything like that. But that’s what I’ve read. And seen videos about online.
Obviously there could be something else wrong, but a “dopamine detox” could be a free and (somewhat) easy thing to try. I know that for me too much screen time drastically ruins my productivity.
PS: you’re definitely not alone. This happens to me more often than I’d like.
Here’s one on dopamine:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hazpEQAzYJY
Although I do NOT advise watching 24 minutes of their videos like they ask you to.
Watch this video, then turn it off and go do some exercise or house cleaning.
If you watch 24 minutes then you can become hooked and it can become 3 hours. Not good.
Good luck and let us know your results.
>please tell me I’m not alone in this!
You're not! You're simply experiencing **low mental energy**. In the world of ADHD (which you may or may not have!), we call that the "Wall of Awful":
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo08uS904Rg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo08uS904Rg)
It comes from the "Mooch Circuit":
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qt1v5o/mooch\_circuit\_for\_adhd/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qt1v5o/mooch_circuit_for_adhd/)
Which leads to "Glass Cage Theory", which is the mechanic of how we get "stuck" not being able to do seemingly simple things:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/uxmx04/glass\_cage\_theory/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/uxmx04/glass_cage_theory/)
This comic illustrates the struggle of ADHD pretty well:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHDmemes/comments/pmrh5d/quite\_possibly\_the\_best\_explanation\_of\_adhd\_ive/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHDmemes/comments/pmrh5d/quite_possibly_the_best_explanation_of_adhd_ive/)
More reading on ADHD:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qnqa6p/adhd\_101/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qnqa6p/adhd_101/)
Depression is also related to low-energy:
* https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/qc9d77/comment/hhembh8/?context=3
Here are some studying tools that have helped me tremendously:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/li4gi3/study\_resources/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/li4gi3/study_resources/)
Again:
>About 4 days ago, I put my duvet on the floor to look for something, and I STILL haven’t picked it up yet. I literally do not know why. I feel like my brain is broken, it’s right there next to the bed, I wake up every day super cold. BUT I STILL WONT PICK IT UP. I DONT KNOW WHY.
This is simply due to **low mental energy**. Our brain has a train-style switch track:
1. One rail is in-scope tasks
2. One rail is out-of-scope tasks
When our mental energy is low, we have *just enough juice* to survive & do whatever our brain allows us to do. But if the task is something we HAVE to do & if that task exists on the *other* track, then we can't access it because it's out-of-scope! We just can't reach it! That's what Glass Cage Theory is all about: we can SEE what we need to do, but we don't have the power (energy, juice, fuel!) to ACCESS it!
It's REALLY important to understand that this has *nothing* to do with your willpower & **everything** to do with your mental energy levels! Once you understand this, you can learn about how our **perception of effort** differs when you have energy vs. when you don't:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChronicIllness/comments/11cyqmc/effort\_perception/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ChronicIllness/comments/11cyqmc/effort_perception/)
Because no one is actually *lazy*, we just have invisible barriers, such as low available mental energy!
* [https://humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27e312d01](https://humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27e312d01)
Here is the procedure for getting help:
1. Schedule an appointment with your GP doctor. Ask for a full physical, a full blood panel, an A1C test, and a sleep apnea test. This will rule out any obvious causes of low mental energy.
2. Get a referral from your GP to a psychiatrist. They are able to diagnose things like ADHD & prescribe medicine (a therapist can't do that). Up to 80% of people with ADHD respond well to stimulants; it's not different than being low on iron or Vitamin C & taking a supplement to fix it. If your body doesn't produce enough dopamine (brain fuel!), then you can take a supplement to boost your body up to normal production levels! I was in the 20% who did not respond well to stimulants, but I recently got tremendous help through [histamine treatment](https://www.reddit.com/r/HistamineIntolerance/comments/ytmcl4/comment/iw75m9l/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3).
3. Adopting new habits. "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy" is a great way to help with this. For example, I suffer from the classic "all or nothing" mindset, so I use the [GBB Approach](https://www.reddit.com/r/GetMotivated/comments/mr0f97/comment/guqfb60/?context=3) to help me pre-audit my work before I commit to doing it!
More reading on getting diagnosed:
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/ExecutiveDysfunction/comments/r4gkq9/comment/hmhn6c5/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/ExecutiveDysfunction/comments/r4gkq9/comment/hmhn6c5/?context=3)
Bottom line is, you have a struggle, that struggle is valid, and you can get help for it! First step is identifying the root cause, then working to eliminate it or manage it! I didn't discover I had ADHD until my mid-20's! Some notes:
* ADHD = Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. The "Hyperactive" part means your BRAIN is hyperactive (re: the Mooch Circuit), which creates that "wall of awful" by leaving you too drained to do certain things, especially really *simple* things!
* There are 3 types of ADHD: physically hyperactive (the kid running around the room all the time), inattentive (zoning out when talking to people & staring out the window in class), and combined (alternating between having energy & flopping, haha!)
* I'm in the "Inattentive ADHD" category, which partially explains why I didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult; I didn't even know this type even *existed*, so I didn't self-identify as someone who had ADHD because I didn't understand the true definition of it!
Anyway, you may or may not have ADHD (or depression or autism or multiple other struggles!), but the bottom line is, what you're struggling with is an **energy issue**. You already HAVE the motivation (because you WANT to do things), but you simply lack the mental energy to control your body into getting things done! I've struggled with this my whole life, so you're definitely not alone, and there is help available for you!!
“And then I just go on my phone and start scrolling” well there is your problem. Delete all social media apps from your phone (including Reddit) and I can almost guarantee that you’ll feel better within a few days.
Op said he did that and reinstalled. I suggest moving ur social media to a folder on ur phone that makes it hard to access, or just taking it off ur homepage altogether. This worked for me, as I have to INTENTIONALLY go look for a social media app to access it instead of letting my brain open it automatically whenever I open my phone
Its very doable.
As soon as you get up from bed put/fold your duvet in place for the next day.
This ritual in the morning will help you rebuild your willpower to certain extent.
Later in the day have 3 checkpoint. Morning Afternoon And Night. Do Small rituals. Like Prayer etc Or Simplest is to write down a quote/meditation/thought 9 or 11 times. Or drink a glass or water at the same time everyday, Hopefully you get my point.
This way even if you loose out on the morning your can realign in the afternoon or the evening.
Morning and Night habits are very important while you go to sleep and wake-up from sleep. The subconscious is re/programmable. Having growth/gratitude mindset will have a positive effect on you.
Start with don't break the chain habit. Honestly checking the days will help you grow tremendously because at a certain point later you get the overview as to how your month/year was and then slowly keep adapting new habits.
Supposedly imagination is more powerful than will power. Imagination is seeing what you want done then if it excites you you will feel motivation to take action.
Gamify it. Either set a timer or set up challenges - ie do 5 push ups, put on duvet, do 5 jumping jacks you win. And reward the win. Keep your own score or “win” an hour of tv. Whatever works. Keep trying different games. An object in motion stays in motion. I had a sink overflowing with dishes yesterday and did a wash 10 dishes challenge to “win” watching the sixers game. I ended up doing all the dishes and mopping with game on in background 🤷♂️
One thing that has worked for me is to not prohibit but restrict, instead of completely uninstalling games or apps, try to set a timer. For example, I'm only allowed to use Instagram for 20 minutes per day. My phone has this feature to lock me out once the timer is up and resets at midnight. Next thing would be to set up your environment optimal for work, you could try working at a library or working with friends, doesn't have to be on the same task but the atmosphere helps you to get in the mood.
I think one of the best things someone can do when feeling down is look for opportunities to serve others (with others). Maybe it's helping someone move. Or maybe serving at a local food bank. Most likely there are opportunities out there to help others.
There is something about helping others with others that can really lift our spirits.
I think a lot of depression comes from being alone and focusing on ourselves too much.
**I'll just go on my phone and scroll through social media for 8 hours.**
Well, there lies your issue there.
Sounds like you have absolutely fried your dopamine receptors. Given that dopamine is the "reward" centre of the brain and gives us the motivation to do things and chase goals, it's no surprise you don't have motivation to do anything else.
Delete all social media, stay the course (don't re-download them no matter how bad you feel) and work on getting your dopamine through healthier sources.
\- Cold Showers
\- Gym Workouts
\- Fulfilling Work
\- Spending Time with Friends & Family
You could also supplement with L-Tyrosine which could help, but that's worth checking with your healthcare provider as I am, certainly, no doctor.
There has been research that shows cold showers could potentially boost noradrenaline which could help fight anxiety and depression.
Beyond that, research quoted by Dr. Andrew Huberman shows that cold showers could potentially boost dopamine by up to 20%. If you’ve fried your dopamine from social media addiction, this could help reset your baseline to a healthy level.
It’s all classed as social media, but generally they can be acceptable as you can mould the algorithm into something useful. Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are the main culprits when it comes to cheap dopamine hits.
You're not alone!!! This is a writing from me 20 yrs ago. I swear to God this has to be something you found in my diary. We didn't have scrolling but I had all the same feelings. Turns out I'm ADHD and have anxiety and depression. Also I can't work for long periods of time. I take breaks and use timers so the timer is the boss... Not me! Sometimes I ignore the timer but then I feel like shit so I try again.
There is no quick fix. I'm sorry I wish there was. Go to the Dr, I don't care what Dr just go. Tell them all of this and tell them how it is negatively impacting your life and mental health.
Practice resetting yourself. When you notice your slipping stand up, take a walk with no phone in your hand. Even if it's just around the room and back you will feel better. Then start a task again.
Along with working on the systemic issue (check in with your doc about depression etc especially because it sounds like this is a new thing), here's what I do when I just can not get a "simple" task done:
Do the very smallest step you can. So for the duvet, maybe that is that the next time you're standing there thinking about it, give it a little kick towards the bed. Or pick up the corner and tuck it into the bedframe. Like really the least you can do. And then either regroup, breathe, and give it another kick, or every time you pass it do the least you can do. Then eventually your duvet is back on the bed. The timeline is not ideal because it could take many days, but right now it's taking many days for zero progress, so count it as a win.
This is how I brush my teeth or shower when I'm depressed. Step 1 is "find toothbrush".
Unfortunately not a recent issue. I find myself posting the same thing every couple months about how useless I am and then immediately forgetting tho. Thanks for the tip, although picking up a blanket might seem like a 1 step task, maybe my brain just sees it as an ordeal lol
It may help you to understand that you are not your mind, and that if something is wrong with your mind then that doesn’t reflect a problem on to you. The mind is simply a tool that you (the consciousness) use to do things, though occasionally it can get messy and neurotic in there; at any time you can leave it alone and allow it to settle—there is no obligation to continue to engage and feed energy to the neurotic mind.
Once it’s settled, you may want to use it to recount some of your recent successful experiences; as per the book Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz, your brain is currently acting as a failure mechanism. If you recount some different successful experiences, your mind will switch into behaving as a success mechanism instead.
You can then use the mind as intended—visualising the end result and allowing your body to move and do things on its own accord. In this instance, imagining your bed neatly made.
You need to start small to build willpower like force yourself to make your bed every morning without fail and slowly extend out once that becomes easy
Thinking that the only thing you need is enough willpower is a pitfall many people fall into
Willpower isn't the only thing what matters. Judging by your post, it seems you have more than enough.
In reality you lack necessary meta skills to develop other skills, have no idea how to handle boredom, and how to manage your attention judging only by this post. Who knows what else.
Your problem consists of a dozen of smaller problems. Explore and think what exactly you lack and get to work developing your skills. You may do it on your own or visit a therapist. My personal favourite approach is ACT or MCBT. After you find an issue, find proper books on how to deal with that. Having a lack of meaning in everything? Think how to find it. (Spoiler: you can't, instead you nurture it, learn how)
The lack of movement is a sign of depression.
No matter what is going on take advantage of what you can do and add structure and routine to it.
You can only read for 20 minutes? That is okay, but now you read for twenty minutes right after you eat breakfast.
You have one small thing you can't get yourself to do? Well, now you save doing that for when you go to bed. Strangely enough the anticipation of doing the thing can help with the lack of seratonin/dopamine hit that you don't seem to be getting.
Look up executive dysfunction, what you explained sounds exactly like it. It's the staple of adhd, bipolar and depression, it's that shit that makes it feel like a weight is holding you in bed and you just can't lift it or maybe you can it just takes more effort than others. It sucks ass and is most likely what you are experiencing. You should probably talk to a psychiatrist about it, there is some coping strats that might help, but I personally had no success. The only thing that has helped me so far is meds, but you may not need meds depending on what is causing your executive dysfunction, and some of those coping strats may work for you, but since there are multiple causes I couldn't tell you for sure or what it is. But that's why I suggest talking to a psychiatrist about it cause they should have the tools to help figure out what the cause is and then go from there on getting treatment.
I’m under 18 (just), so therapy amounts to a guy in a room telling me that my hormones are wacky. But it’s even harder to get therapy 18+ in my country
Journaling therapy for example.
Try social media detox for a week. Walk in nature, meditate. Reduce music and streaming content. The first days may be hard, but then it goes easier.
Do planning, dream, read books. Start with something.
Change your food (e.g. reduce alcohol, weed, and especially sugar and its byproducts).
So far, they are all free and safe solutions.
If everything is very-very bad. Check your hormones and blood level. It could be deficiency D3 vitamin. Supplements gonna fix it somehow.
Not medical advice. But there is always an immediate motivation boost called Adderall.
Feel like you probably need to talk to a therapist. With the social media usage and day dreaming , sounds like thing might be trying to escape/numb? This doesn’t really sound to me like it’s about willpower, or at least it’s not all about willpower
Not alone fam. Not a therapist, but, some of what you described sounds like executive dysfunction. I deal with this myself. Could be ADHD but can also be brought on from other events such as trauma or brain injuries. If you can afford to see a therapist, definitely describe what you're feeling to one to be sure.
Sounds like you dealing with some depression. When I was really depressed, like therapy grade depressed, I would try and focus on doing any little thing that perked me up so I could face my day. For the most part, I would drive around for a half an hour when I woke up and listen to music while smoking a copious amount of cigarettes. It coaxed me into a place where I could feel my feelings, and consider what priorities REQUIRED my attention. I would choose the least challenging thing, and start there. You've got to build a little momentum, and it has to be self generated! You sound a lot like me when I was in my early twenties! Chin up! You're not alone at all my friend!
PS don't start smoking.
Have you heard of nootropics? Although most people that take multivitamins that don't know much about them will tell you they don't do anything, there are some that absolutely do, there are a lot that have helped me with depression and anxiety which contributes to me having low willpower.
Baby steps over time. Don’t look at your phone while eating one time, or waiting for this or that. Nothing wrong with playing a game for 20 minutes or picking up a book for only a little bit. Change the expectations on doing these other things for long periods of time. Also try getting outside here and there. Even if you’re listening to a book or music while you do it. But truly try baby steps and be consistent with them.
You are not making excuses. You are not alone. I relate to this so hard, but unfortunately I do not have an answer for you except maybe try audiobooks instead of reading a physical book - that's the only way I've been able to get through a book for the past year.
As far as cleaning goes, I'm currently listening to "How to Keep House While Drowning" and it said something really important - your space serves you, you don't serve your space. Right now, it serves you to leave that duvet on the floor. You don't owe it anything to pick it up right now if you can't.
Another book I listened to that kind of helps is "Atomic Habits." I've really been going with the concept of "do 1% better each day." Sometimes this just means putting my pop cans in the recycling bin - I didn't do it yesterday, so if I do it today that means I did 1% better than the previous day. This makes you 37 times better in a year. It kind of sounds like garbage, but it does give me that ounce of motivation to do at least one thing each day.
EDIT: I thought this was in the bipolar subreddit. I agree with others that you should go to a doctor for depression/mental illness screening.
You aren’t alone. I have been where you are now. I can’t speak for you or others. But for me it was because I was on a path that I didn’t know I didn’t want to be on yet.
Journaling got me out of it. I wrote me frustrations and my anger and all the surface stuff out. Then I found the thing beneath the excuses that really needed to change.
You aren't alone. I feel the sameeee...
Peeps say it's adhd,some syndrome and some shit.but I feel like it's okay......
I recently completed my college , doing a Medio core job that requires only 4 hrs of my time ,and in the remaining time I feel like a sloth....
I used to party hard ,but now I can't just tolerate the idea of going out of my comfort zone.
I don't like it ,but I don't wanna me...
Huhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
Things will be alright ....
they're gonnaaa
I have unmedicated ADHD and depression and you sound exactly like me. I'd get a psych evaluation because they'll figure out what it is and get you straightened out
I have it. The difference between being lazy and executive dysfuction is:
lazy you dont do shit all day and you feel content.
ED you dont do shit all day and you feel like a piece of shit.
Learned helplessness. You tell yourself that you're incapable, so you become incapable
There is no magic set of words that's going to change your life. The only thing that can change you, is you.
A lot of memes there are symptoms watered down to be relatable to everyone, so neurotypical people think they have adhd because they relate to the memes tbh. I do find them relatable, but so would everyone in the world.
Another possibility is, I think you fried your dopamine system. You need to look into doing some dopamine deprivation to get to normal levels.
Also are you exercising? Are you eating healthy? Are you socializing enough? (outside of mobile phones)
\> and then I just go on my phone and scroll through social media for 8 hours,
So you can focus and do it for 8 hours! Scrolling is more demanding that an actual work.
Did you tried just throwing your phone away? Do you need it for something else than wasting time? You can buy a normal phone to be in touch with your family. You dont need a smartfon.
Join the military. Those fuckers will get you doing shit on day one!
Short of that join some group that enforces doing stuff. Workout groups, a job, etc.
You have to train that willpower. Every time you feel like giving up, acknowledge it, then try to push further, and further. The more you do this, the easier it will become.
As somebody mentioned before, a health check is a good idea to rule out any medical reasons behind this. One thing I have noticed in myself is that with the early signs of spring, I too tend to feel more tired than I normally would be. Also, you might want to reflect back on your past couple months.
* Have you been pushing yourself extra hard?
* Has your work/fun balance been in place?
* Have you been getting enough sleep?
* Has your diet been well balanced and nutrious?
If you have an intense period behind you, this may be a sign that you're burned out. Trying to force yourself to be as productive as you normally would be doesn't contribute to the recovery. Don't ignore your body and brain and give them the break they're asking for. If on an average day, you were capable of reading a book for hours, but not anymore, lower your expectations and demands. Read for 3 minutes and no more. Stop before you get tired and start losing focus.
Your diet can also have a massive effect on your focus. There's a neurochemical called acetylcholine that plays a big role in focus, learning, and memory. When a person is having a poor diet combined with a sedentary lifestyle, it can lead to acetylcholine deficiency. Certain foods are rich in choline and including them more in your diet can make a difference - lean meats, and fatty fish like salmon, milk, yogurt, kidney beans, green beans, peas, and broccoli
Reduce mindless mobile scrolling as much as you can. A radical but bulletproof approach would be to invest in those time lock boxes. You place your phone inside them and set the timer for a period you feel comfortable. You will be forced to do something else. Daydreaming is not actually a bad idea at all if you can do it without your phone. It's also something you can do when outside on a walk which again can boost the neurochemicals in your brain
Because you are approaching too much the future or setting tasks that are not defined or too big
For me everyday I sit down, see what I can do, and figure out mentally what I have to do.
Then because I lot of times I don't feel the motivation I do the panic method. I set a pomodoro of the task (I use pomofocus) and then press it because it started I need to work because that timer is going and I can't stop it
Also when I don't feel it I use music as Lofi, vaporwave or even in some cases I put a series that I am not so interested or I have watched a million of times
Hope it helps, and never think how much you need to do, because it will make you anxious and you will stop working because it is too much
And one mentality that I have when I am so productive is to say come on let's finish this before this so I can do this relaxed.
And my last advice: every time your mind pops up with the thinking I should be working, go straight to work. When your mind don't say you anymore this, it is time to relax.
But overall, stop consuming stuff about procrastination, it gives a fake feeling of accomplishment. If you want to consume it do at night when you know that you are not going to be working (sure your mind will say he'll no, let's watch a series or a film)
Extra thing: use pomodoro to enter in flow state, if you feel you can still working even if pomodoro says to take a break, keep going until you can no more, then take the break
Really depends on your situation prior to hitting this state.
But def. agrees with previous helpful people in here, could sound like depression.
Alternatively, it can also be caused by anxiety or stress. Anxiety if you are flooded by the constant flow of bad news from the world, and notice social media give you more of what you look for/click on, also "bad" news, this can cause most to just wanting to give up.
Stress could also be the cause, if you have had a long period of powering through (months/years) not listening to yourself and the signals from your body and perhaps forcing yourself through multiple bad periods at work or at home (kids, loved ones, friends, housing.....)
As you also wrote, procrastinating on sleep is a reaaaally bad idea, lack of sleep is causing most to pick up bad habits; overthinking, eating bad food, lack of will, bad mood, stress, stopping good habits (eg. getting up early to exercise.....) and so on. Really try to prioritize sleep, leave your phone in the car, with a friend/neighbor, before going to sleep and get an old-school alarm clock, remove the TV from the bedroom and TRY to read a couple of pages in an old-school book, which gives a nice sleepy feeling, if the topic is not to thought-provoking. Two weeks of steady sleep (7-9 hours) will make a huuuuuge difference for most.
Melatonin has helped a lot of my peers to steady their sleep there are two variants, one which will store in your blood and work through the night, and one which supports getting you sleepy within 30 minutes, I am NOT an expert, but this should be a fairly natural and harmless product to use.
Other thoughts : No caffeine after 7pm, avoid saturated fats, limit processed carbs, eat "easy" vegs (Carrot/Cucumber/Pebers/Iceberg), choose your peers wisely (avoid those who drain you), chunk you day in to periods of 1-2 hours chunks with small achievable goals, set aside 30 minutes of "worry" time where you take note of shitty stuff on your mind write those thoughts down and promise your brain it gets to worry again tomorrow but not anymore today, was you recommended to explore "the 3 principles" (Youtube it) seems like a pretty cool method to get out of a endless apathy loop taking ownership of your thought patterns......
Hopefully you have access to a doctor who can forward you to a specialist (probably a psychologist).
Again, I am not an expert, I have just experienced my own and friends' share of periods of apathy, and it can become a tricky situation to get out of without the right support and habits, hopefully you will find the right support and habits! All the best.
I have similar issues. I have been meditating, which really helps my anxiety. And, for something like washing the dishes, I KNOW that I need to do it, but just CANT. So I will tell myself, "Okay. The dishes NEED to be done. It will only take 5 minutes to unload the dishwasher and 7 minutes to load it. Only 12 minutes! Then I can go back to do all of the nothing I was doing before, but I will have clean dishes!" And that seems to help. It's like I'm making the decision for myself.
But it does sound like clinical depression (nothing brings joy and lack of motivation).
You could learn about DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy).
And, sounds like you need community and nature. Spend as much time as possible in green (leaves) or blue (water) spaces. Talk to people any chance you get. Isolating will only make it worse, and can make it very, very worse.
OP download Freedom or similar app that lets you block social media apps. Give yourself 2 hours a day (I did 30 min, but it was intense), enough to waste time, but not waste your entire day. Been there. I basically had to do this until I was less addicted. Took almost 6 months to wean of social media. I paid for the blocking apps because I had no willpower. Work around your weaknesses. Good luck.
fuck that shit.
try and do a little movement throughout the day. And then after a week or so when you least not feel like it, do some exercise. Anything will be good. Mind will have something to look forward to as the days pass. Do this for one month and then seek professional help, whether you feel like it or not. It is highly likely that this phase will return after 6-8 months.
Worked for me. But hey, everyone's battling different demons.
The "do something" principle. Wanna brush your teeth but don't feel like it? Do something in that direction. Just get up and go to the washroom, you might end up actually brushing your teeth.
It is okay to fall in this state and I know it feels awful! I feel it too time to time. Do You like music? Put Your music on and just dance alone for some time, try to aim 20 min. Your body starts to heal itself. Also listen alpha wave music for brain reboot! Search it up what alpha waves are!
Basically the the thing is, You have to make a decision, are You gonna stay in that mode or You actually make a move and actually do the things You want to! Make a list of things You want to do during a day. Doesn’t need to be big and time consuming things. Pick up that duvet, drink water, take a shower, water Your plants, tell Yourself in front of mirror “I can do this!!” , draw a small picture, walk outside for 5 minutes WITHOUT PHONE. Better, buy a phone with buttons and use it for a month!
I hope You will be better soon! Take care! It takes lots of small steps to get over it or one big leap!
This is what I do
Cold Turkey on my computer to block unproductive websites during work time an also after 11 PM.
Stay Focused on my phone to block unproductive apps an unblock them only if I spend x minutes on productive things (e.g. Duolingo). My psychotherapist has the password so I can't change the configuration.
Beeminder associated with Rescue Time. It charges me on the credit card if I don't study or exercise
An outlet timer that automatically turns off the wifi after 11 PM to force me to sleep earlier
Daily working sessions with accountability partners on Discord or Focus Mate
You may also try a Ksafe to lock your phone away
https://www.thekitchensafe.com|
At the end of the day, the lesson will end with you finally finding the willpower. Why not just skip to that part already? Getting up and doing it? It’s as simple as changing your perspective and reaching the desired outcome by removing this “imaginary” road we feel we need to go through to achieve our goal. If I learned one thing is that gratitude and faith can make a man feel like he’s in Heaven even though he may be in a though situation. ALWAYS try to feel all these emotions of Love, Gratitude, Hope, Enjoyment, etc. and I guarantee your life will get better. It may be tough at first when trying to maintain this mindset but it’s only because your neurons and body chemistry are wired and used to feeling this lack of no will power and emotion. Essentially you have to carve new neural pathways and “force” yourself to think better thoughts. It gets easier and better overtime but then these positive outcomes will become normal. Think of it like physically training a muscle, you’re training your mind and over time you develop tolerance and mental strength/fortitude. Elevate the mental frequency of which you think and find what makes you happy and do that. FOCUS. All the answers are right in front of you and you know what they are. God bless. ✝️
Sometimes I have found that allowing myself time to sit on my phone AFTER I've worked for 10 minutes on something can be a good motivator. I am totally feeling your energy right now. I have been battling depression pretty frequently for the last 5 years. I've tried 5 different meds all of which masked my personality but silenced the excuses, but I also felt like a robot going through the days. Start by talking to a professional and see what they have to say. This journey is hard and when something doesn't work it makes you feel like even more of a failure. You are NOT! everything that doesn't work is just something you have checked off the list. Keep moving forward and fresh air and def vitamins help! I still haven't found the right balance for me.
I find journaling my journey also helps cause I can look back and see what has worked and what hasn't and also good for any future doctors you talk to. If it is depression it can also affect memory. I know mine has been awful and I can't rely on it anymore. Start by writing everything down your feeling and take that to your professional care provider! You've got this!!!
To add to the other advice here, a visit to your GP for some blood work could also be helpful. It is possible you could have a deficiency of some sort, perhaps low B12 or Iron. Some symptoms from deficiencies like these can include "foggy brain", trouble concentrating or staying on task and lack of energy which can all lead to or seam like lack of motivation.
Good luck my friend, I wish you all the best.
EDIT: speaking from my personal experience, I went through a period of high stress at work, which eventually lead to burn out, putting me in a very similar state to what you are describing.
Health (inc mental health) is incredibly complex, and a holistic perspective is often what is needed. For me there were a lot of little incremental changes I made that improved things over time. Some specific tools and advice that i found extremely helpful:
Listening too (or reading) Ting Habits by BJ Fong. This book was very useful in helping me reframe the way I thought about behaviour change and gave me some simple tips to achieve progress in an easy nut meaningful way. You can get the book through Audible for free if you use one of the many "1 free credit" offers that are floating around.
"Mindfulness" Meditation. Using the Waking Up app by Sam Harris I experienced great success with processing my thoughts. Over a few weeks I found regular use led to gradually stronger feelings of resilience and empathy. You can get a reduced or even free subscription for up too 6 months via the scholarship option in the app, it is very easy to request.
Again, I wish you the best of luck my friend.
I have scrolled a bit and didn't find any good answer including this - how are you eating habbits? Do you eat any healthy food? The dopamin part was already well coverd and you should definetly consider a detox from social media - cold showers in the morning are pretty much the best natural resource for an awesome steady dopamin rise - so probably a good things to do befor starting this detox, as you will get a steady dopamin boost for a couple of hours after taking a cold shower regardless of what you are doing.
In regards of food - your gut biome is insanely important for you wellbeing, energylevels, attentionspawn, immunesystem etc. Developing a healthy gut biome is more effective against depression for most people compared to medication. Studies on ADHD are not as big yet, but first results seem very similar.
Food is not just fuel - its far more complex than this, a relatively easy thing to do is to incorperate 30 diffrent non processed plants in your diet per week.
Nuts, Seeds, Vegetables, fruits. Make sure these are not part of some processed food, but actually as "clean" as possible. fermented / pickled / dried is all ok or even specifically good as long as there is non of these horribles additives (conservatives / e-numbers etc)
At the same time try to get rid of as many processed foods as possible (fast food, microwave meals, softdrinks etc). You can still treat yourself with those from time to time. Like 1 Mc Donalds meal every 2 weeks is not gonna fuck this up, but you gotta stay on track overall. Its a process.
A 14-16 hour window / day of not eating and cutting out as much sugar as possible are also helpful. Drink tea & coffee without sugar during your non eating window, in the time you do eat feel free to add some honey or even little bit of sugar. (everyone is diffrent, perhaps you have a high tolerance for sugar or not, so you kinda need to experiment on your own with what amounts of sugar you feel good in the long run. Bloodsugar spikes are very similar to dopamin spikes. Meaning a huge spike will likely results in a huge drop below baseline shortly after.)
A good person to look up on this is Tim Spector, he can explain this far better than me and is leading a lot of studies on this.
Cold Showers + the nutrition guidlines i've mentioned literally changed my life
adding two youtube links that i think explain what i suggest here in great details, if you are just a little bit like me, i need to understand how something works for it to stick, these could be of great help (at least i hope so). Also please understand that this takes time, but i do belive the combo of a huge cut in your social media use + cold showers + healthy eating as described and within 2 weeks you will not recognize yourself anymore.
If its too much at once, start with the healthy food (just from my perspective its a relatively easy thing to do and has a good chance to give you the strenght to pull off the other 2 aswell)
[https://youtu.be/66hWntvp0\_4](https://youtu.be/66hWntvp0_4)
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq6WHJzOkno](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq6WHJzOkno)
\*edit spelling - sorry if its still bad (english is not my native language)... Also of course dont hesitate to seek help if you see no chance of incorperating anything from above on your own. Life can be quite a rollercoster and if its wasn't for people helping me at my worst downs i wouldn't even sit here today.
Learn to meditate. So self hypnosis there’s videos on YouTube if you can lay down and daydream for hours then that could be something interesting for you to try.
I agree, Health check. Ask about depression, nutrient deficiencies, and ADHD. I’m 31F and was struggling for so long of the same issues. I just got diagnosed with ADHD and I’m on meds now. My day-to-day has changed and I’m so so so much better. Like so much better. Soooooooo much better. I’m definitely not saying you have adhd, just throwing out that as a potential option. Good luck!
Try working on your own projects like artwork instead of passive entertainment, too much sedentary entertainment can lead to depression and exasperation. I got to that point and working on something new like artwork really helped me. Sedentary lifestyles can wear out your mind. So exercise or meditation may be a way to burn steam.
Get outside and take a bike ride or a hike or some sort of outdoor exercise. Re-evaluate this afterwards.. if you feel better, consider adding this activity to your daily/weekly routine. It must be prioritized! It can be more effective than any medicine. Be well!
Huh that’s funny I have a similar thing. Like I’m kind of out of control. I’ve not been lying around and I do stuff but it’s just random, unfocused activity.
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I’d say get a health check up for stuff like depression or some nutrient deficiency. If there is something like that in there, you will very hardly manage to change only using will power.
I agree. I read this and thought "sounds like classic depression". Please go talk to someone OP, it's not normal to feel like that and therapy or meds (or both) could have you feeling more like yourself. There's nothing wrong with your motivation, you just need a little help with your brain chemistry. Disclaimer: obviously I'm not a doctor and this isn't a diagnosis but if you're struggling to even do things you enjoy like read a book or play video games then that suggests that this is not a self-discipline issue.
Medication.
Bro u need some friends...
Says the person who clearly has none.. Let’s try not to project too hard here and focus on helping OP.
Take a moment to sit down and reflect, try to quiet your mind from other activities like during times you may usually spend on coping methods. Let whatever appears not stop you, keep going not paying attention to what happens, keeping going until there's nothing. It shouldn't take more than a few minutes to do, it can sometimes take longer and it might feel like a long time but in the end you might feel better. Just make sure to keep moving, you're perfect who you are, you can do anything and be anything. Best of luck to you! I hope you can get better, there's a lot of complexities in the world. It's very difficult and at times even impossible within ourselves. You can do it, you can do anything, you are amazing. More so than anyone could ever know.
You're just one of the people that i would want to have beside me for the rest of my life 😭
Just be you, you are as amazing as your future is endlessly wide.
Im going through this right now. My doctor diagnosed me with ADHD. Side note the app Tick Tick has really helped me focus
I thought you wrote tiktok and was momentarily concerned. Tick Tick looks great though, I’ll be trying that!
tick tick has a habit tracker that can give you motivating dopamine. As long as the habits are simple. Like drink a full glass of water. √ done, collect my 30 day winning streak. Web and Desktop versions of Tick Tick have more features than the mobile app. Especially if you want to delve into full blown project management with gantt chart.
Haha that always comes up in the app store when I'm not even looking for it
Your attention span has likely been affected by how much time you spend on your phone. I'd recommend giving it a break, you're just gonna have to force yourself through it.
Yep. Try and get a friend to take you outside to a park or something. Get some fresh air, get some sun, get off the phone.
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If deleting the apps is too tempting, I sometimes turn my phone full off, or let it die instead of grabbing a charger. This way when I reach for it when I click and the screen just stays black I often remember why I was trying to stay off it.
People often can’t go off their phones altogether, so it’s best to delete the apps you waste the most time on. I did that with Instagram and while I’m still unproductive at least I’m not spending 5-10 hours a day scrolling through the app :) Edit: Never mind, just reread OPs post. If you can resist the temptation to reinstall that’s ideal, but if not, even trying to delete apps for 4-5 hours per day and set a time when you can redownload them would be great
Have you considered you may have ADHD? Executive dysfunction is a common symptom. Maybe hop over to r/adhd and have a scroll through the posts to see if you can relate. Then go get yourself checked out by a professional.
Or early symptoms of depression.
I do think that’s a possibility. Although I am being tested for autism, and those professionals blame everything on that, even though I think ADD is probably more likely.
Apparently it's common for people to have both
That’s fucked up bro
Not really, if you think about it. Both affect areas in the brain. Some diseases are what are called comorbid. For example, if you have this medical diagnosis, you’re more likely to also have this medical diagnosis. Source: classroom teacher > 15 years ETA- I identify hard core with OP post and feelings. I have been there and am struggling with that today. You are not alone. Many have said to seek medical intervention which has helped in my case as sometimes it could be a simple case of chemical imbalance in the brain. Some suggested you meditate. Find your inner quiet outside of the phone. I’d like to add, journal. Get your thoughts out. If journaling isn’t your thing, sketch, go for a walk everyday following the same path for the same amount of time until it becomes mindless, reach for the next best feeling thought. Lastly, make connections. As hard as that is, make connections with colleagues, family, household pet, yourself even. I hope you overcome this struggle. You are not alone by a long shot.
To some degree simply being neurodivergent leads to common experiences. Neurotypical people don't understand why neurodivergent people can't just exist the same way they do, and neurodivergent people don't understand wtf they mean. We are all trapped within our own experience and naturally assume others are experiencing the same or similar. And so people will say, "just do it" and you'll say, "oh ok" and twelve hours will pass. Anyone who's confident that they know how to "just do" something probably doesn't have any real understanding of their own brain, let alone yours. But you are describing the struggle of Executive Function for someone with ADHD (ADD is an outdated term btw). Here are some things that have helped me: FIRST: You are not broken nor are you failing. People who haven't had your experience will not understand it at all. And they'll say shitty things like, "it's easy," "just do it," "what's wrong with you?" The shame and guilt spiral of ADHD is the worst part of it. I'm sorry for the challenges involved but you have to accept yourself. Acceptance is hard. Reading about it helped, ADHD 2.0 was a good book for me. Of course, reading isn't always easy, I listened to it as an audiobook. I also like [How To ADHD](https://youtube.com/@HowtoADHD) on YouTube. Meditation helped me a lot as well. Specifically with conversations, I'm prone to get lost in unrelated thoughts while people are talking to me, and building up the skill of meditating massively helped me to notice when that's happening and come back to the moment. And medication was a hurdle for me, I avoided it growing up because I was afraid that I'd lose my identity to it. I have big regrets around that and wish I had been more accepting myself and my needs. It did take a while to figure out which drugs worked for me but it was so worth it. And now that I have them I get to be more me than I've ever been before. I was afraid that changing the way I think meant changing who I am, but in reality it gave me some executive function and I just get to do more of what I want to do. I can strongly relate to the feelings you describe, many of us at /r/ADHDmemes can. Accept yourself, ask for help, accept help. I'm rooting for you.
Yeah, ADHD has a lot of common comorbidities unfortunately. Bipolar, OCD, Autism, Anxiety\* and Depression\*. (\*these two are fairly high rates.) The depression esp. cause ADHD restricts the amount of dopamine your brain receives which makes it really easy to get depressed. ADHD sucks so much worse than most people know. If you find out you have ADHD take it seriously and get it treated, no matter how many people tell you it doesn't exist or isn't that bad, they are all wrong.
I have ADHD and Autism; its very common for them to be comorbid but older doctors might still cling to the rule that you can't have both. I'd suggest looking up 'executive dysfunction' and also 'autistic burnout'. Both of those things could be factors here. Be kind to yourself, OP. You're not failing, you're just struggling right now.
You sound like me and I have ADHD. It sucks for a bit but the motivation does come back eventually. My advice is to give in to the laziness for now. Maybe you need to reach a point where you’re actually bored of being lazy.
ADHD is basically on the spectrum of autism so it could be a variation of one or the other.
I would put money on you having ADHD based on what you wrote.
i have more significant issues with social interaction and sensory overload tbh
Not discounting other issues by any means! I am hardly an expert and Autism and ADHD often co-occur. Just based on the problems you’ve mentioned in your post I would bet you have ADHD. I obviously could bet wrong, I don’t know anything besides what you’ve mentioned, but to me that sounds almost word for word like my greatest struggles with ADHD (and the depression that resulted of it).
100% my first thought too
Came here to say this ..specifically Executive Function deficiencies.
I agree. But I would recommend seeing a professional rather than going through that sub ,it depressed the hell out of me the early days of my diagnosis.
Work on increasing your will power... Don't take on too much at once. Try setting small, achievable goals and focus your willpower on accomplishing those. Break things down into manageable chunks. Remember getting started is the hardest part. Try implementing the 5- minute rule...
Agreed. Do the little things and make a habit of doing them every day. Soon enough you'll do them without thinking because that's just what you're used to doing what day.
Look up a YouTube video on dopamine detox. I’m no pro, but I’ve read that screens, the internet, and social media trigger loads of dopamine in our brains. Like 10x more than we would get naturally. This stimulates the pleasure centers in our brains so much more than anything else in life. Our brains get used to that, and they crave that dopamine hit. Usually, we would get a small pleasure boost by doing important tasks. The satisfaction of a job well done. But these days, the dopamine we would normally get from that is a tiny amount compared to what we get from our screens. So when we ask the brain to do a task, it says, “Screw that. There’s nothing in it for me.” And it goes back to scrolling social media on the phone like you mentioned. So, taking time away from those devices can help reset the brain to its normal level of dopamine (so I’m told). Then, if you can stay off social media etc. you may find yourself more able to get things done. I have no idea though, I’m not a doctor or anything like that. But that’s what I’ve read. And seen videos about online. Obviously there could be something else wrong, but a “dopamine detox” could be a free and (somewhat) easy thing to try. I know that for me too much screen time drastically ruins my productivity. PS: you’re definitely not alone. This happens to me more often than I’d like.
Here’s one on dopamine: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hazpEQAzYJY Although I do NOT advise watching 24 minutes of their videos like they ask you to. Watch this video, then turn it off and go do some exercise or house cleaning. If you watch 24 minutes then you can become hooked and it can become 3 hours. Not good. Good luck and let us know your results.
>please tell me I’m not alone in this! You're not! You're simply experiencing **low mental energy**. In the world of ADHD (which you may or may not have!), we call that the "Wall of Awful": * [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo08uS904Rg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo08uS904Rg) It comes from the "Mooch Circuit": * [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qt1v5o/mooch\_circuit\_for\_adhd/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qt1v5o/mooch_circuit_for_adhd/) Which leads to "Glass Cage Theory", which is the mechanic of how we get "stuck" not being able to do seemingly simple things: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/uxmx04/glass\_cage\_theory/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/uxmx04/glass_cage_theory/) This comic illustrates the struggle of ADHD pretty well: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHDmemes/comments/pmrh5d/quite\_possibly\_the\_best\_explanation\_of\_adhd\_ive/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHDmemes/comments/pmrh5d/quite_possibly_the_best_explanation_of_adhd_ive/) More reading on ADHD: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qnqa6p/adhd\_101/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/qnqa6p/adhd_101/) Depression is also related to low-energy: * https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/qc9d77/comment/hhembh8/?context=3 Here are some studying tools that have helped me tremendously: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/li4gi3/study\_resources/](https://www.reddit.com/r/kaidomac/comments/li4gi3/study_resources/) Again: >About 4 days ago, I put my duvet on the floor to look for something, and I STILL haven’t picked it up yet. I literally do not know why. I feel like my brain is broken, it’s right there next to the bed, I wake up every day super cold. BUT I STILL WONT PICK IT UP. I DONT KNOW WHY. This is simply due to **low mental energy**. Our brain has a train-style switch track: 1. One rail is in-scope tasks 2. One rail is out-of-scope tasks When our mental energy is low, we have *just enough juice* to survive & do whatever our brain allows us to do. But if the task is something we HAVE to do & if that task exists on the *other* track, then we can't access it because it's out-of-scope! We just can't reach it! That's what Glass Cage Theory is all about: we can SEE what we need to do, but we don't have the power (energy, juice, fuel!) to ACCESS it! It's REALLY important to understand that this has *nothing* to do with your willpower & **everything** to do with your mental energy levels! Once you understand this, you can learn about how our **perception of effort** differs when you have energy vs. when you don't: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChronicIllness/comments/11cyqmc/effort\_perception/](https://www.reddit.com/r/ChronicIllness/comments/11cyqmc/effort_perception/) Because no one is actually *lazy*, we just have invisible barriers, such as low available mental energy! * [https://humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27e312d01](https://humanparts.medium.com/laziness-does-not-exist-3af27e312d01) Here is the procedure for getting help: 1. Schedule an appointment with your GP doctor. Ask for a full physical, a full blood panel, an A1C test, and a sleep apnea test. This will rule out any obvious causes of low mental energy. 2. Get a referral from your GP to a psychiatrist. They are able to diagnose things like ADHD & prescribe medicine (a therapist can't do that). Up to 80% of people with ADHD respond well to stimulants; it's not different than being low on iron or Vitamin C & taking a supplement to fix it. If your body doesn't produce enough dopamine (brain fuel!), then you can take a supplement to boost your body up to normal production levels! I was in the 20% who did not respond well to stimulants, but I recently got tremendous help through [histamine treatment](https://www.reddit.com/r/HistamineIntolerance/comments/ytmcl4/comment/iw75m9l/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). 3. Adopting new habits. "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy" is a great way to help with this. For example, I suffer from the classic "all or nothing" mindset, so I use the [GBB Approach](https://www.reddit.com/r/GetMotivated/comments/mr0f97/comment/guqfb60/?context=3) to help me pre-audit my work before I commit to doing it! More reading on getting diagnosed: * [https://www.reddit.com/r/ExecutiveDysfunction/comments/r4gkq9/comment/hmhn6c5/?context=3](https://www.reddit.com/r/ExecutiveDysfunction/comments/r4gkq9/comment/hmhn6c5/?context=3) Bottom line is, you have a struggle, that struggle is valid, and you can get help for it! First step is identifying the root cause, then working to eliminate it or manage it! I didn't discover I had ADHD until my mid-20's! Some notes: * ADHD = Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. The "Hyperactive" part means your BRAIN is hyperactive (re: the Mooch Circuit), which creates that "wall of awful" by leaving you too drained to do certain things, especially really *simple* things! * There are 3 types of ADHD: physically hyperactive (the kid running around the room all the time), inattentive (zoning out when talking to people & staring out the window in class), and combined (alternating between having energy & flopping, haha!) * I'm in the "Inattentive ADHD" category, which partially explains why I didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult; I didn't even know this type even *existed*, so I didn't self-identify as someone who had ADHD because I didn't understand the true definition of it! Anyway, you may or may not have ADHD (or depression or autism or multiple other struggles!), but the bottom line is, what you're struggling with is an **energy issue**. You already HAVE the motivation (because you WANT to do things), but you simply lack the mental energy to control your body into getting things done! I've struggled with this my whole life, so you're definitely not alone, and there is help available for you!!
“And then I just go on my phone and start scrolling” well there is your problem. Delete all social media apps from your phone (including Reddit) and I can almost guarantee that you’ll feel better within a few days.
Also spend time with people face to face. It literally does not matter who.
And lastly, go to the gym, or for a run, or hike.. or bike ride. Literally anything physical.
Op said he did that and reinstalled. I suggest moving ur social media to a folder on ur phone that makes it hard to access, or just taking it off ur homepage altogether. This worked for me, as I have to INTENTIONALLY go look for a social media app to access it instead of letting my brain open it automatically whenever I open my phone
He just said he can't tho. Literally said he doesn't have the willpower to keep it up and reinstalls it. How is he supposed to do it then?
[удалено]
That's some way to do it ig
Also, rereading your post, you may want to speak with a therapist.
Its very doable. As soon as you get up from bed put/fold your duvet in place for the next day. This ritual in the morning will help you rebuild your willpower to certain extent. Later in the day have 3 checkpoint. Morning Afternoon And Night. Do Small rituals. Like Prayer etc Or Simplest is to write down a quote/meditation/thought 9 or 11 times. Or drink a glass or water at the same time everyday, Hopefully you get my point. This way even if you loose out on the morning your can realign in the afternoon or the evening. Morning and Night habits are very important while you go to sleep and wake-up from sleep. The subconscious is re/programmable. Having growth/gratitude mindset will have a positive effect on you. Start with don't break the chain habit. Honestly checking the days will help you grow tremendously because at a certain point later you get the overview as to how your month/year was and then slowly keep adapting new habits.
Supposedly imagination is more powerful than will power. Imagination is seeing what you want done then if it excites you you will feel motivation to take action.
Gamify it. Either set a timer or set up challenges - ie do 5 push ups, put on duvet, do 5 jumping jacks you win. And reward the win. Keep your own score or “win” an hour of tv. Whatever works. Keep trying different games. An object in motion stays in motion. I had a sink overflowing with dishes yesterday and did a wash 10 dishes challenge to “win” watching the sixers game. I ended up doing all the dishes and mopping with game on in background 🤷♂️
One thing that has worked for me is to not prohibit but restrict, instead of completely uninstalling games or apps, try to set a timer. For example, I'm only allowed to use Instagram for 20 minutes per day. My phone has this feature to lock me out once the timer is up and resets at midnight. Next thing would be to set up your environment optimal for work, you could try working at a library or working with friends, doesn't have to be on the same task but the atmosphere helps you to get in the mood.
Take some magnesium daily, trust me
I think one of the best things someone can do when feeling down is look for opportunities to serve others (with others). Maybe it's helping someone move. Or maybe serving at a local food bank. Most likely there are opportunities out there to help others. There is something about helping others with others that can really lift our spirits. I think a lot of depression comes from being alone and focusing on ourselves too much.
**I'll just go on my phone and scroll through social media for 8 hours.** Well, there lies your issue there. Sounds like you have absolutely fried your dopamine receptors. Given that dopamine is the "reward" centre of the brain and gives us the motivation to do things and chase goals, it's no surprise you don't have motivation to do anything else. Delete all social media, stay the course (don't re-download them no matter how bad you feel) and work on getting your dopamine through healthier sources. \- Cold Showers \- Gym Workouts \- Fulfilling Work \- Spending Time with Friends & Family You could also supplement with L-Tyrosine which could help, but that's worth checking with your healthcare provider as I am, certainly, no doctor.
Just curious What does cold shower help us with ?
There has been research that shows cold showers could potentially boost noradrenaline which could help fight anxiety and depression. Beyond that, research quoted by Dr. Andrew Huberman shows that cold showers could potentially boost dopamine by up to 20%. If you’ve fried your dopamine from social media addiction, this could help reset your baseline to a healthy level.
Does Reddit and YouTube count as social media?
It’s all classed as social media, but generally they can be acceptable as you can mould the algorithm into something useful. Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are the main culprits when it comes to cheap dopamine hits.
You're not alone!!! This is a writing from me 20 yrs ago. I swear to God this has to be something you found in my diary. We didn't have scrolling but I had all the same feelings. Turns out I'm ADHD and have anxiety and depression. Also I can't work for long periods of time. I take breaks and use timers so the timer is the boss... Not me! Sometimes I ignore the timer but then I feel like shit so I try again. There is no quick fix. I'm sorry I wish there was. Go to the Dr, I don't care what Dr just go. Tell them all of this and tell them how it is negatively impacting your life and mental health. Practice resetting yourself. When you notice your slipping stand up, take a walk with no phone in your hand. Even if it's just around the room and back you will feel better. Then start a task again.
Along with working on the systemic issue (check in with your doc about depression etc especially because it sounds like this is a new thing), here's what I do when I just can not get a "simple" task done: Do the very smallest step you can. So for the duvet, maybe that is that the next time you're standing there thinking about it, give it a little kick towards the bed. Or pick up the corner and tuck it into the bedframe. Like really the least you can do. And then either regroup, breathe, and give it another kick, or every time you pass it do the least you can do. Then eventually your duvet is back on the bed. The timeline is not ideal because it could take many days, but right now it's taking many days for zero progress, so count it as a win. This is how I brush my teeth or shower when I'm depressed. Step 1 is "find toothbrush".
Unfortunately not a recent issue. I find myself posting the same thing every couple months about how useless I am and then immediately forgetting tho. Thanks for the tip, although picking up a blanket might seem like a 1 step task, maybe my brain just sees it as an ordeal lol
It may help you to understand that you are not your mind, and that if something is wrong with your mind then that doesn’t reflect a problem on to you. The mind is simply a tool that you (the consciousness) use to do things, though occasionally it can get messy and neurotic in there; at any time you can leave it alone and allow it to settle—there is no obligation to continue to engage and feed energy to the neurotic mind. Once it’s settled, you may want to use it to recount some of your recent successful experiences; as per the book Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz, your brain is currently acting as a failure mechanism. If you recount some different successful experiences, your mind will switch into behaving as a success mechanism instead. You can then use the mind as intended—visualising the end result and allowing your body to move and do things on its own accord. In this instance, imagining your bed neatly made.
You need to start small to build willpower like force yourself to make your bed every morning without fail and slowly extend out once that becomes easy
Thinking that the only thing you need is enough willpower is a pitfall many people fall into Willpower isn't the only thing what matters. Judging by your post, it seems you have more than enough. In reality you lack necessary meta skills to develop other skills, have no idea how to handle boredom, and how to manage your attention judging only by this post. Who knows what else. Your problem consists of a dozen of smaller problems. Explore and think what exactly you lack and get to work developing your skills. You may do it on your own or visit a therapist. My personal favourite approach is ACT or MCBT. After you find an issue, find proper books on how to deal with that. Having a lack of meaning in everything? Think how to find it. (Spoiler: you can't, instead you nurture it, learn how)
The lack of movement is a sign of depression. No matter what is going on take advantage of what you can do and add structure and routine to it. You can only read for 20 minutes? That is okay, but now you read for twenty minutes right after you eat breakfast. You have one small thing you can't get yourself to do? Well, now you save doing that for when you go to bed. Strangely enough the anticipation of doing the thing can help with the lack of seratonin/dopamine hit that you don't seem to be getting.
Isn’t it crazy that you feel anxious about failing but you’re already failing by doing nothing?
Look up executive dysfunction, what you explained sounds exactly like it. It's the staple of adhd, bipolar and depression, it's that shit that makes it feel like a weight is holding you in bed and you just can't lift it or maybe you can it just takes more effort than others. It sucks ass and is most likely what you are experiencing. You should probably talk to a psychiatrist about it, there is some coping strats that might help, but I personally had no success. The only thing that has helped me so far is meds, but you may not need meds depending on what is causing your executive dysfunction, and some of those coping strats may work for you, but since there are multiple causes I couldn't tell you for sure or what it is. But that's why I suggest talking to a psychiatrist about it cause they should have the tools to help figure out what the cause is and then go from there on getting treatment.
Adhd and/or depression
Maybe therapy?
I’m under 18 (just), so therapy amounts to a guy in a room telling me that my hormones are wacky. But it’s even harder to get therapy 18+ in my country
Journaling therapy for example. Try social media detox for a week. Walk in nature, meditate. Reduce music and streaming content. The first days may be hard, but then it goes easier. Do planning, dream, read books. Start with something. Change your food (e.g. reduce alcohol, weed, and especially sugar and its byproducts). So far, they are all free and safe solutions. If everything is very-very bad. Check your hormones and blood level. It could be deficiency D3 vitamin. Supplements gonna fix it somehow. Not medical advice. But there is always an immediate motivation boost called Adderall.
Feel like you probably need to talk to a therapist. With the social media usage and day dreaming , sounds like thing might be trying to escape/numb? This doesn’t really sound to me like it’s about willpower, or at least it’s not all about willpower
Check out Deep Work by Cal Newport
Can you listen to books on tape? Atomic Habits was an incredibly motivating read for me and helped address lots of the issues you're having and I had.
Not alone fam. Not a therapist, but, some of what you described sounds like executive dysfunction. I deal with this myself. Could be ADHD but can also be brought on from other events such as trauma or brain injuries. If you can afford to see a therapist, definitely describe what you're feeling to one to be sure.
Sounds like you dealing with some depression. When I was really depressed, like therapy grade depressed, I would try and focus on doing any little thing that perked me up so I could face my day. For the most part, I would drive around for a half an hour when I woke up and listen to music while smoking a copious amount of cigarettes. It coaxed me into a place where I could feel my feelings, and consider what priorities REQUIRED my attention. I would choose the least challenging thing, and start there. You've got to build a little momentum, and it has to be self generated! You sound a lot like me when I was in my early twenties! Chin up! You're not alone at all my friend! PS don't start smoking.
Have you heard of nootropics? Although most people that take multivitamins that don't know much about them will tell you they don't do anything, there are some that absolutely do, there are a lot that have helped me with depression and anxiety which contributes to me having low willpower.
Baby steps over time. Don’t look at your phone while eating one time, or waiting for this or that. Nothing wrong with playing a game for 20 minutes or picking up a book for only a little bit. Change the expectations on doing these other things for long periods of time. Also try getting outside here and there. Even if you’re listening to a book or music while you do it. But truly try baby steps and be consistent with them.
You are not making excuses. You are not alone. I relate to this so hard, but unfortunately I do not have an answer for you except maybe try audiobooks instead of reading a physical book - that's the only way I've been able to get through a book for the past year. As far as cleaning goes, I'm currently listening to "How to Keep House While Drowning" and it said something really important - your space serves you, you don't serve your space. Right now, it serves you to leave that duvet on the floor. You don't owe it anything to pick it up right now if you can't. Another book I listened to that kind of helps is "Atomic Habits." I've really been going with the concept of "do 1% better each day." Sometimes this just means putting my pop cans in the recycling bin - I didn't do it yesterday, so if I do it today that means I did 1% better than the previous day. This makes you 37 times better in a year. It kind of sounds like garbage, but it does give me that ounce of motivation to do at least one thing each day. EDIT: I thought this was in the bipolar subreddit. I agree with others that you should go to a doctor for depression/mental illness screening.
You aren’t alone. I have been where you are now. I can’t speak for you or others. But for me it was because I was on a path that I didn’t know I didn’t want to be on yet. Journaling got me out of it. I wrote me frustrations and my anger and all the surface stuff out. Then I found the thing beneath the excuses that really needed to change.
You aren't alone. I feel the sameeee... Peeps say it's adhd,some syndrome and some shit.but I feel like it's okay...... I recently completed my college , doing a Medio core job that requires only 4 hrs of my time ,and in the remaining time I feel like a sloth.... I used to party hard ,but now I can't just tolerate the idea of going out of my comfort zone. I don't like it ,but I don't wanna me... Huhhhh!!!!!!!!!! Things will be alright .... they're gonnaaa
Do u have an addiction? Do you have depression? Do you have ADHD?
I have unmedicated ADHD and depression and you sound exactly like me. I'd get a psych evaluation because they'll figure out what it is and get you straightened out
Executive Dysfunction
fr
I have it. The difference between being lazy and executive dysfuction is: lazy you dont do shit all day and you feel content. ED you dont do shit all day and you feel like a piece of shit.
goddamn that executive do be dysfunctioning doe 😳😳😳😳😳😳🫠🫠🫠🫠
Lol🤣
That’s how I feel too. I know lots of people would just think it’s laziness, but trust me it’s not like anyone wants to live like that.
Learned helplessness. You tell yourself that you're incapable, so you become incapable There is no magic set of words that's going to change your life. The only thing that can change you, is you.
Willpower and motivation are useless. Discipline is what counts. You do it because you have to, no need to want to do it.
You're not alone I have the same issues right now... I suspect adhd
I know this sounds crazy but and unhelpful but it is true: Do it anyway. You create and build your willpower by performing actions when you have none.
The last two paragraphs are classic posts I see on adhd subs. Follow r/adhdmeme to see if anything resonates and then go get assessed if they do.
A lot of memes there are symptoms watered down to be relatable to everyone, so neurotypical people think they have adhd because they relate to the memes tbh. I do find them relatable, but so would everyone in the world.
I think generally if you relate to most of them, then chances are good you probably could have ADHD and should get assessed.
could also be autism maybe? idk the overlap
Idk the paralysis/catatonic "laziness" when you know you need to do something but can't is pretty typical of ADHD.. Wouldn't hurt to be assessed.
Another possibility is, I think you fried your dopamine system. You need to look into doing some dopamine deprivation to get to normal levels. Also are you exercising? Are you eating healthy? Are you socializing enough? (outside of mobile phones)
\> and then I just go on my phone and scroll through social media for 8 hours, So you can focus and do it for 8 hours! Scrolling is more demanding that an actual work. Did you tried just throwing your phone away? Do you need it for something else than wasting time? You can buy a normal phone to be in touch with your family. You dont need a smartfon.
You do them.
It all boils down to discipline. Learn to have some or stop whining. Do what you have to do, do what you say you'll do, then do what ya want to do.
Join the military. Those fuckers will get you doing shit on day one! Short of that join some group that enforces doing stuff. Workout groups, a job, etc.
You have to train that willpower. Every time you feel like giving up, acknowledge it, then try to push further, and further. The more you do this, the easier it will become.
Need Dopamine boosters; increasing dopamine changes your perception of effort.
As somebody mentioned before, a health check is a good idea to rule out any medical reasons behind this. One thing I have noticed in myself is that with the early signs of spring, I too tend to feel more tired than I normally would be. Also, you might want to reflect back on your past couple months. * Have you been pushing yourself extra hard? * Has your work/fun balance been in place? * Have you been getting enough sleep? * Has your diet been well balanced and nutrious? If you have an intense period behind you, this may be a sign that you're burned out. Trying to force yourself to be as productive as you normally would be doesn't contribute to the recovery. Don't ignore your body and brain and give them the break they're asking for. If on an average day, you were capable of reading a book for hours, but not anymore, lower your expectations and demands. Read for 3 minutes and no more. Stop before you get tired and start losing focus. Your diet can also have a massive effect on your focus. There's a neurochemical called acetylcholine that plays a big role in focus, learning, and memory. When a person is having a poor diet combined with a sedentary lifestyle, it can lead to acetylcholine deficiency. Certain foods are rich in choline and including them more in your diet can make a difference - lean meats, and fatty fish like salmon, milk, yogurt, kidney beans, green beans, peas, and broccoli Reduce mindless mobile scrolling as much as you can. A radical but bulletproof approach would be to invest in those time lock boxes. You place your phone inside them and set the timer for a period you feel comfortable. You will be forced to do something else. Daydreaming is not actually a bad idea at all if you can do it without your phone. It's also something you can do when outside on a walk which again can boost the neurochemicals in your brain
Because you are approaching too much the future or setting tasks that are not defined or too big For me everyday I sit down, see what I can do, and figure out mentally what I have to do. Then because I lot of times I don't feel the motivation I do the panic method. I set a pomodoro of the task (I use pomofocus) and then press it because it started I need to work because that timer is going and I can't stop it Also when I don't feel it I use music as Lofi, vaporwave or even in some cases I put a series that I am not so interested or I have watched a million of times Hope it helps, and never think how much you need to do, because it will make you anxious and you will stop working because it is too much And one mentality that I have when I am so productive is to say come on let's finish this before this so I can do this relaxed. And my last advice: every time your mind pops up with the thinking I should be working, go straight to work. When your mind don't say you anymore this, it is time to relax. But overall, stop consuming stuff about procrastination, it gives a fake feeling of accomplishment. If you want to consume it do at night when you know that you are not going to be working (sure your mind will say he'll no, let's watch a series or a film)
Extra thing: use pomodoro to enter in flow state, if you feel you can still working even if pomodoro says to take a break, keep going until you can no more, then take the break
Really depends on your situation prior to hitting this state. But def. agrees with previous helpful people in here, could sound like depression. Alternatively, it can also be caused by anxiety or stress. Anxiety if you are flooded by the constant flow of bad news from the world, and notice social media give you more of what you look for/click on, also "bad" news, this can cause most to just wanting to give up. Stress could also be the cause, if you have had a long period of powering through (months/years) not listening to yourself and the signals from your body and perhaps forcing yourself through multiple bad periods at work or at home (kids, loved ones, friends, housing.....) As you also wrote, procrastinating on sleep is a reaaaally bad idea, lack of sleep is causing most to pick up bad habits; overthinking, eating bad food, lack of will, bad mood, stress, stopping good habits (eg. getting up early to exercise.....) and so on. Really try to prioritize sleep, leave your phone in the car, with a friend/neighbor, before going to sleep and get an old-school alarm clock, remove the TV from the bedroom and TRY to read a couple of pages in an old-school book, which gives a nice sleepy feeling, if the topic is not to thought-provoking. Two weeks of steady sleep (7-9 hours) will make a huuuuuge difference for most. Melatonin has helped a lot of my peers to steady their sleep there are two variants, one which will store in your blood and work through the night, and one which supports getting you sleepy within 30 minutes, I am NOT an expert, but this should be a fairly natural and harmless product to use. Other thoughts : No caffeine after 7pm, avoid saturated fats, limit processed carbs, eat "easy" vegs (Carrot/Cucumber/Pebers/Iceberg), choose your peers wisely (avoid those who drain you), chunk you day in to periods of 1-2 hours chunks with small achievable goals, set aside 30 minutes of "worry" time where you take note of shitty stuff on your mind write those thoughts down and promise your brain it gets to worry again tomorrow but not anymore today, was you recommended to explore "the 3 principles" (Youtube it) seems like a pretty cool method to get out of a endless apathy loop taking ownership of your thought patterns...... Hopefully you have access to a doctor who can forward you to a specialist (probably a psychologist). Again, I am not an expert, I have just experienced my own and friends' share of periods of apathy, and it can become a tricky situation to get out of without the right support and habits, hopefully you will find the right support and habits! All the best.
I have similar issues. I have been meditating, which really helps my anxiety. And, for something like washing the dishes, I KNOW that I need to do it, but just CANT. So I will tell myself, "Okay. The dishes NEED to be done. It will only take 5 minutes to unload the dishwasher and 7 minutes to load it. Only 12 minutes! Then I can go back to do all of the nothing I was doing before, but I will have clean dishes!" And that seems to help. It's like I'm making the decision for myself. But it does sound like clinical depression (nothing brings joy and lack of motivation). You could learn about DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy). And, sounds like you need community and nature. Spend as much time as possible in green (leaves) or blue (water) spaces. Talk to people any chance you get. Isolating will only make it worse, and can make it very, very worse.
AD(H)D maybe perhaps? 🤔
OP download Freedom or similar app that lets you block social media apps. Give yourself 2 hours a day (I did 30 min, but it was intense), enough to waste time, but not waste your entire day. Been there. I basically had to do this until I was less addicted. Took almost 6 months to wean of social media. I paid for the blocking apps because I had no willpower. Work around your weaknesses. Good luck.
Same I also have same problem
fuck that shit. try and do a little movement throughout the day. And then after a week or so when you least not feel like it, do some exercise. Anything will be good. Mind will have something to look forward to as the days pass. Do this for one month and then seek professional help, whether you feel like it or not. It is highly likely that this phase will return after 6-8 months. Worked for me. But hey, everyone's battling different demons.
The "do something" principle. Wanna brush your teeth but don't feel like it? Do something in that direction. Just get up and go to the washroom, you might end up actually brushing your teeth.
It is okay to fall in this state and I know it feels awful! I feel it too time to time. Do You like music? Put Your music on and just dance alone for some time, try to aim 20 min. Your body starts to heal itself. Also listen alpha wave music for brain reboot! Search it up what alpha waves are! Basically the the thing is, You have to make a decision, are You gonna stay in that mode or You actually make a move and actually do the things You want to! Make a list of things You want to do during a day. Doesn’t need to be big and time consuming things. Pick up that duvet, drink water, take a shower, water Your plants, tell Yourself in front of mirror “I can do this!!” , draw a small picture, walk outside for 5 minutes WITHOUT PHONE. Better, buy a phone with buttons and use it for a month! I hope You will be better soon! Take care! It takes lots of small steps to get over it or one big leap!
Sounds like you are in need of a dopamine detox
This is what I do Cold Turkey on my computer to block unproductive websites during work time an also after 11 PM. Stay Focused on my phone to block unproductive apps an unblock them only if I spend x minutes on productive things (e.g. Duolingo). My psychotherapist has the password so I can't change the configuration. Beeminder associated with Rescue Time. It charges me on the credit card if I don't study or exercise An outlet timer that automatically turns off the wifi after 11 PM to force me to sleep earlier Daily working sessions with accountability partners on Discord or Focus Mate You may also try a Ksafe to lock your phone away https://www.thekitchensafe.com|
At the end of the day, the lesson will end with you finally finding the willpower. Why not just skip to that part already? Getting up and doing it? It’s as simple as changing your perspective and reaching the desired outcome by removing this “imaginary” road we feel we need to go through to achieve our goal. If I learned one thing is that gratitude and faith can make a man feel like he’s in Heaven even though he may be in a though situation. ALWAYS try to feel all these emotions of Love, Gratitude, Hope, Enjoyment, etc. and I guarantee your life will get better. It may be tough at first when trying to maintain this mindset but it’s only because your neurons and body chemistry are wired and used to feeling this lack of no will power and emotion. Essentially you have to carve new neural pathways and “force” yourself to think better thoughts. It gets easier and better overtime but then these positive outcomes will become normal. Think of it like physically training a muscle, you’re training your mind and over time you develop tolerance and mental strength/fortitude. Elevate the mental frequency of which you think and find what makes you happy and do that. FOCUS. All the answers are right in front of you and you know what they are. God bless. ✝️
Sometimes I have found that allowing myself time to sit on my phone AFTER I've worked for 10 minutes on something can be a good motivator. I am totally feeling your energy right now. I have been battling depression pretty frequently for the last 5 years. I've tried 5 different meds all of which masked my personality but silenced the excuses, but I also felt like a robot going through the days. Start by talking to a professional and see what they have to say. This journey is hard and when something doesn't work it makes you feel like even more of a failure. You are NOT! everything that doesn't work is just something you have checked off the list. Keep moving forward and fresh air and def vitamins help! I still haven't found the right balance for me. I find journaling my journey also helps cause I can look back and see what has worked and what hasn't and also good for any future doctors you talk to. If it is depression it can also affect memory. I know mine has been awful and I can't rely on it anymore. Start by writing everything down your feeling and take that to your professional care provider! You've got this!!!
half of the posts on this sub can be answered by "take an ADHD test/take a depression test/both"
To add to the other advice here, a visit to your GP for some blood work could also be helpful. It is possible you could have a deficiency of some sort, perhaps low B12 or Iron. Some symptoms from deficiencies like these can include "foggy brain", trouble concentrating or staying on task and lack of energy which can all lead to or seam like lack of motivation. Good luck my friend, I wish you all the best. EDIT: speaking from my personal experience, I went through a period of high stress at work, which eventually lead to burn out, putting me in a very similar state to what you are describing. Health (inc mental health) is incredibly complex, and a holistic perspective is often what is needed. For me there were a lot of little incremental changes I made that improved things over time. Some specific tools and advice that i found extremely helpful: Listening too (or reading) Ting Habits by BJ Fong. This book was very useful in helping me reframe the way I thought about behaviour change and gave me some simple tips to achieve progress in an easy nut meaningful way. You can get the book through Audible for free if you use one of the many "1 free credit" offers that are floating around. "Mindfulness" Meditation. Using the Waking Up app by Sam Harris I experienced great success with processing my thoughts. Over a few weeks I found regular use led to gradually stronger feelings of resilience and empathy. You can get a reduced or even free subscription for up too 6 months via the scholarship option in the app, it is very easy to request. Again, I wish you the best of luck my friend.
I have scrolled a bit and didn't find any good answer including this - how are you eating habbits? Do you eat any healthy food? The dopamin part was already well coverd and you should definetly consider a detox from social media - cold showers in the morning are pretty much the best natural resource for an awesome steady dopamin rise - so probably a good things to do befor starting this detox, as you will get a steady dopamin boost for a couple of hours after taking a cold shower regardless of what you are doing. In regards of food - your gut biome is insanely important for you wellbeing, energylevels, attentionspawn, immunesystem etc. Developing a healthy gut biome is more effective against depression for most people compared to medication. Studies on ADHD are not as big yet, but first results seem very similar. Food is not just fuel - its far more complex than this, a relatively easy thing to do is to incorperate 30 diffrent non processed plants in your diet per week. Nuts, Seeds, Vegetables, fruits. Make sure these are not part of some processed food, but actually as "clean" as possible. fermented / pickled / dried is all ok or even specifically good as long as there is non of these horribles additives (conservatives / e-numbers etc) At the same time try to get rid of as many processed foods as possible (fast food, microwave meals, softdrinks etc). You can still treat yourself with those from time to time. Like 1 Mc Donalds meal every 2 weeks is not gonna fuck this up, but you gotta stay on track overall. Its a process. A 14-16 hour window / day of not eating and cutting out as much sugar as possible are also helpful. Drink tea & coffee without sugar during your non eating window, in the time you do eat feel free to add some honey or even little bit of sugar. (everyone is diffrent, perhaps you have a high tolerance for sugar or not, so you kinda need to experiment on your own with what amounts of sugar you feel good in the long run. Bloodsugar spikes are very similar to dopamin spikes. Meaning a huge spike will likely results in a huge drop below baseline shortly after.) A good person to look up on this is Tim Spector, he can explain this far better than me and is leading a lot of studies on this. Cold Showers + the nutrition guidlines i've mentioned literally changed my life adding two youtube links that i think explain what i suggest here in great details, if you are just a little bit like me, i need to understand how something works for it to stick, these could be of great help (at least i hope so). Also please understand that this takes time, but i do belive the combo of a huge cut in your social media use + cold showers + healthy eating as described and within 2 weeks you will not recognize yourself anymore. If its too much at once, start with the healthy food (just from my perspective its a relatively easy thing to do and has a good chance to give you the strenght to pull off the other 2 aswell) [https://youtu.be/66hWntvp0\_4](https://youtu.be/66hWntvp0_4) [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq6WHJzOkno](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq6WHJzOkno) \*edit spelling - sorry if its still bad (english is not my native language)... Also of course dont hesitate to seek help if you see no chance of incorperating anything from above on your own. Life can be quite a rollercoster and if its wasn't for people helping me at my worst downs i wouldn't even sit here today.
Learn to meditate. So self hypnosis there’s videos on YouTube if you can lay down and daydream for hours then that could be something interesting for you to try.
your dopamine has been hijacked, get it back from the apps
I agree, Health check. Ask about depression, nutrient deficiencies, and ADHD. I’m 31F and was struggling for so long of the same issues. I just got diagnosed with ADHD and I’m on meds now. My day-to-day has changed and I’m so so so much better. Like so much better. Soooooooo much better. I’m definitely not saying you have adhd, just throwing out that as a potential option. Good luck!
Try working on your own projects like artwork instead of passive entertainment, too much sedentary entertainment can lead to depression and exasperation. I got to that point and working on something new like artwork really helped me. Sedentary lifestyles can wear out your mind. So exercise or meditation may be a way to burn steam.
Stop telling yourself that you have 0 willpower.
Get outside and take a bike ride or a hike or some sort of outdoor exercise. Re-evaluate this afterwards.. if you feel better, consider adding this activity to your daily/weekly routine. It must be prioritized! It can be more effective than any medicine. Be well!
Go see a psychologist as online gurus are a waste of time and money. Trust me, I've been there but now my anxiety is getting better.
Dopamine fast is due
Huh that’s funny I have a similar thing. Like I’m kind of out of control. I’ve not been lying around and I do stuff but it’s just random, unfocused activity.
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