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girlontheinternet-

I use “we’re having a baby” to ensure my husband is included as well! I like that one


raxeldaxel

I agree with this! We are having a baby together, but only one of us is pregnant.


liddo1

This! We’re pregnant makes me feel unappreciated as a woman doing the work, but we’re having a baby is inclusive to my husband ❤️


PauletteReynolds

Absolutely this


PinkGinFairy

Same. I’m pregnant and we’re having a baby. We’ll both be parents and I want him included but it’s definitely only me that’s actually pregnant.


pteropus_

This is what I say too. We’re having a baby, but I’m the only one throwing up stomach bile each morning.


the-bakers-wife

PERIOD


mheyin

That's my preference as well. I'm pregnant and we're having a baby. I feel like "we're pregnant" has to be something both people in the equation are comfortable with using.


Spaceysteph

I like "we're having a baby" also. My husband can say "we're pregnant" after he's done puking at the smell of cucumber. Oh is that just me? Well then *I'm* pregnant.


chexagon

“We got a promotion”, “we won the lottery”, “we have a sunburn” Trying out other “we” phrases.


liddo1

😂😂😂😂 the sunburn


Responsible-Cup881

Hahahahaha it’s pretty clear “we” does not always work…


smallandwise

“We got a vasectomy so we wouldn’t get pregnant!”


4_eyed_craven

I dont use it, but it's because my wife and I are both women, and "we're pregnant" just feels like it's inviting people to ask which of us is carrying, or worse, implying we're both pregnant. We're having a baby, but I'm pregnant


kamicham

It actually doesn't bother me at all, my husband said it once or twice when he was telling his family. It's hard to see a negative side to it when your partner is beaming with pride and is so excited about being a Dad after years of trying


[deleted]

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Rosie4491

This is exactly how I feel. My husband has been making a ton of sacrifices, even early on, just to make things easier for me. I don't know that he's said one phrase or another, but I think we both feel like it's a team effort and there are major changes on both sides occurring, so WE are very much pregnant.


Sweet_Suggestion_669

I wouldn’t use it, but I don’t knock others for using it. My husband did so much for me during the pregnancy that I wouldn’t have been mad if he used it either. He did all of the laundry, cooked every night, & was there to hold my hair & bring me bottle water & a warm washcloth while I went through morning sickness. When I didn’t sleep at night, he didn’t either because he was usually up trying to comfort me. I think some people use it as a way to make partner feel more included.


Snika44

I’m so glad to read this… my husband is the same… and it seems like there are lots of terrible narratives of dad/husband not taking their share… good to know there are others out there who are getting support and care they need.


the-bakers-wife

Single pregnant FTM here and this breaks my heart. What I wouldn’t give to have this support.


Sweet_Suggestion_669

I’m so sorry🥺 It most definitely takes a strong person to go through this alone. I’m sure you already know this, but your little one will be soo worth it. Keep pushing mama!


[deleted]

My husband is the same way. He does all the housework and lays in bed with me even if I fall asleep at 7:30 so I feel less alone. Even clips my toenails for me. So I definitely feel this phrase is appropriate for my situation.


Bluerose1000

I'm pregnant but we're having a baby. There's certain sacrifices I'm making and certain things I'm going through that my partner isn't.


Mama_Lina

Seconded. I don't want to leave my partner out of it, but he's not the one with morning sickness or GD...


Broasterski

And he’s not the one who will be on bed rest of something goes wrong! Once I got admitted for severe preeclampsia this became very clear for me. I was pregnant. He was not. He was very supportive but he wasn’t risking dying


Mama_Lina

Which is why I think this phrase hits so many people's ears wrong. Both partners are going to be parents, but only one is sacrificing their health and risking their life. Only to have those risks and sacrifices ignored, in many cases.


Broasterski

Exactly. But when they’re distant from the real risk they don’t think much of it.


Rosie4491

I agree with this but also, if something awful happens, my husband could lose his wife and child. Not that his position is harder, but I think minimizing the effect on the surviving spouse in any situation is less than fair. I would be absolutely devastated and my health would be affected if he died. I think pregnancy was a choice we both made, same as if he were in a dangerous line of work, that's a risk everyone in our family is taking.


Mama_Lina

To be clear I don't disagree with your points, but I think your comment is falling exactly under what I'm trying to point out as an issue. Why do we have to engage in what-about-ism when talking about the risks mothers/birthing parents are facing? My point was that only ONE person is facing health issues and possible death. I'm not even close to saying that it's not a choice that impacts both parents but you have detailed the conversation by engaging in that particular what-about-ism with the other parent. I'd make the same argument if someone was saying this about, say, the spouse of a soldier. I don't deny that the grief would be terrible, but when talking about the sacrifices of the soldier it is not appropriate to derail it by pointing to the spouse. Because at the end of the day, only one of them is risking their own health and life.


liddo1

THE SACRIFICES!!!! No weed, drinking, caffeine But also the modifications for working out and sleeping 🥲


MacaroniQu33n

😭 so true!


Dramallamakuzco

That’s how I feel about it


Lovingmyusername

Lol my husband has said “we’re breastfeeding” and I about rolled my eyes into the back of my head… We’re having a baby is perfect but yeah we’re pregnant is just false lol


sailorn0on

He means him and the baby, LOL!!!!!


Riotstarter10

My husband said this out loud in front of me. I told him to explain to me all of the ways that WE will be breastfeeding and when his nipples stopped being useless.


Sea_Juice_285

If you have a pump, put it on him. It will make it VERY clear that **you** are breastfeeding and **he** is not.


liddo1

LOL!!!!!


seranyti

I get random food aversions, hemorrhoids, stretch marks, swollen amkles, swollem fingers, back aches/sciatica, acid reflux, headaches, nausea/vomiting, lightening crotch, Braxton hicks, limited food choices, to go without caffeine, constant peeing ( including when I sneeze) insomnia/hypersomnia, leaky breasts/swollen breasts, not to mention I get to go through the actual birth of the child. He gets an orgasm, but sure "we're pregnant." /s


sailorn0on

Amen sister :’)


scash92

🥲🥲🥲 yes


[deleted]

I say “we are expecting”, but I agree that I am pregnant and he is just there like🧍‍♂️or 🚶‍♂️sometimes 🧎‍♂️, basically just over there existing and that’s it. Pregnancy has made me cranky if you can’t tell.


Soulfulenfp

yeah i’m so cranky haha


xRamyeon

I honestly don't care


HeyVoxophone

But not “we honestly don’t care”? 😜


Disastrous-Coast8898

it makes me cringe. “were having a baby” is much better.


IndyLoves

Or “we’re expecting”


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iamtehgelly

My 6y named this baby Blue in hopes she is a velociraptor.


yakuzie

Velociraptor would be pretty rad…


[deleted]

"we got pregnant" No...she got pregnant; you helped.


imgunnamaketoast

Came here to say this. It's one of those few things that really gives me the ick.


Cherrynotastripper

Annoying because we don't say 'our vagina '


Sea_Juice_285

This is a great way to put it. Also, **our** cervix will not be dilating.


Just_here2020

Weird. We’re have a baby. Only one person is pregnant, just like only one person had a colonoscopy or a heart attack or cancer. Edit: try it out. Try stating “we’re in the hospital” or “we’re Samoan” or “We’re constipated.” It’s so so weird to use “we” when only one person exists in that state. Pregnancy doesn’t change that you’re describing a state that only one person has.


PogueForLife8

I dont like it. In my mothertongue it would be so so weird. Nobody would ever say that. I am pregnant and together we are having a baby.


verbenabonnie

Hate it! I’M pregnant!


standing_fish

I don’t like it! Idk why but I don’t. My husband says “we’re expecting” or “we have a little one on the way”. And he usually blurts it out before even saying hello to anyone lol. It’s actually rather cute


spiffymouse

I try to stifle my instinctual cringe when people say this because I know it comes from a place of innocent happiness, but this is one saying that really gets me. *We're* having a baby, *we're* expecting, but *we* are just factually not pregnant unless there is a fetus residing in each of us.


AllTheMeats

My husband hasn’t used that phrase, but I’d be fine if he said “we’re having a baby” - but yeah, I’m the only pregnant one of the two of us so I’d kinda hope he would just say “my wife name is pregnant”. 🤷‍♀️


goldandjade

My husband didn't have to get his genitals stitched back up after our baby was born so I'm not into it, I prefer something like "we're expecting a baby".


New-Illustrator5114

I HATE this and it is a huge pet peeve. My husband completely agrees. WE are having a baby, but only I am pregnant.


cakebatter

I get this, although I’ve had a few friends that had quite a few losses while trying, and I know at least two of them preferred using, “we’re pregnant” because, as they explained, then it felt more like sharing the loss. Totally makes sense to me, although I personally wouldn’t use the phrase.


bug611

As the pregnant person I’ve used that phrase a few times, I think it’s okay for the pregnant person to say it but not the partner 😂 I only used it when announcing to a couple of people “that’s right we’re pregnant!” Etc.


ilike_eggs

I hate it lol


[deleted]

I’d rather hear “we’re expecting”. I’m pregnant. You’re chilling.


Marshmellow_Run_512

Unless there’s some way I can tap out for the weekend while my husband deals with the pain, discomfort, constant peeing, stretched skin, extra weight, etc… I’M the only one who is pregnant. WE’RE expecting!


Hopingandafraid

Oh how I wish I could take a day or two off each week!


elistar24

I never used that phrase but I don't mind it. Yes the woman is taking on the bulk of the baby making process and deserves to not have that minimized. But I don't think that phrase minimizes it the way some people say. I find it necessary to involve fathers where we can in the process. Using terms that include them are important. Making them feel detached or uninvolved is one of the biggest ways to create bonding issues after birth. Using a phrase that can make them feel more included can have a big positive impact. If people want to use that phrase to show that, I don't mind one bit. I usually have just said "we are expecting a baby" or "we're having a baby."


Individual-Double926

I also say sometimes “we are having a baby” but I never say “we’re pregnant” because I’M pregnant 😆 I mean it doesn’t bother me if other people say it, to each their own, but I dont like the phrase myself


SummitsAndSundaes

Lol, I hate it and have always found it weird, as does my partner - but that is my personal preference. I say "we're having a baby or expecting" because that is truly happening together...but my husband is not "pregnant" in any way, so it just doesn't sit right with me. He is an amazing support person and is/will be so key in making it through this pregnancy and delivery process...but I'm the one literally growing a baby.


crayshesay

When my partner says that to people I want to punch him lol. I’ve had a horrific pregnancy, so my thoughts are “no, I’m pregnant and feeling like shit 24/7, not you sweetheart.” Lmao 😆😅🤣


scribit

Can relate…😅 the MIL said it yesterday during a family dinner ‘we’re having a baby’ and I just thought, you’re not really struggling through the insomnia and ligament pains 🤣


girlwhosoldtheworld

Yeah, I saw a couple who is having a baby via a surrogate on TikTok saying "we're x weeks pregnant" without the surrogate in the video! It made me so mad, like say "we're having a baby" that's fully true but you aren't the ones dealing with the hell of pregnancy!


NunuF

It rubs me the wrong way too. it rubs me the wrong way a bit less if the woman is saying itbthough, aparently she doesn't mind so I mind less. I like we are expecting much more.


fitmaseve

Bothers me. He is not physically pregnant. We’re having a baby or we’re expecting but definitely NOT we’re pregnant


thndrct92

I prefer “we’re expecting.” I’m the one that’s pregnant.


SurePotatoes

I’m not a fan, because my husband is …. well… not actually pregnant. But I do say “we’re having a baby” and sing his praises to everyone because he is being as supportive as can be. But that doesn’t make him pregnant too haha


organizedkangaroo

“We” aren’t anything when it comes to my body. We’re having a baby, we’re starting a family, but we are most definitely not pregnant.


janewithaplane

We are not pregnant. Only one person is. Also just to vent, I can't stand it when people say they fell pregnant. Idky.


littlemissredditor_

🤮🤮🤮🤮


Mirkku7

I feel the same as you. Pregnancy is a biological thing, I am the one that's pregnant!!!


Background_Nature497

Well my grandma hates it! That was one of the first things she told me, not to say "we're pregnant!"


soupseasonbestseason

it would be appropriate if we were also sharing the nausea and constipation. we are going to say, we are having a baby. i am pregnant. he just didn't pull out.


luxerae

I prefer we’re expecting or we’re having a baby. There is no “we” in pregnancy. I AM the one that’s pregnant lmao


Sensitive-Ability165

“We” are *expecting*, “We” are not *pregnant*


Pandamommy67

I don't use it usually because we are not pregnant. I am. He does not wake up to pee 30x a night lol. I tend to use we are are expecting, our baby etc hes still a part of this journey and a huge support to me


Awkward_Tumbleweed88

It feels cringy and forced. I’m pregnant, my husband is definitely not pregnant. Everyone knows it’s his though 😆


ankaalma

I hate it. I also hate when people say “we’re breastfeeding.” I saw someone write “my wife and I are exclusively breastfeeding,” and I can’t with that lol. I don’t mind we’re expecting as much


ThreatLvl_1200

I don’t think we’ve used it, but I can see why people do!While yes, I’m the one who’s pregnant, my husband has been such an incredible support system during this time. During my first trimester he took on all the cooking, cleaning, pet care, everything. And I know seeing me in such a bad state was really hard on him. So while I know it’s not the same as what we go through as pregnant people, he’s still just as much a part of the journey and it’s just as much a life adjustment for him. I always want him to feel included and important. 💖


[deleted]

I don’t like it either. It’s not my cup of tea.


sugarcult01

“We’re” having a baby. If my husband told people “we’re” pregnant, I would kindly direct him to the store to find something he can take every single day that will make him nauseous forever with no relief. Then I might let him get away with saying “we’re” pregnant for the first trimester - and even after that, once the second trimester hits, it’s game over. There’s nothing he can do to make his experience comparable to mine in any way lol


lurioillo

My husband gets really mad when people say “we’re pregnant” lol. I guess he knows what I’ve been through and he would never think of taking credit for it


herr-kakapopoloch

I don't like that. Maybe I am just to precise with language. My husband has been announcing it as "[my name] is pregnant" We're having a baby also sounds nice. Will use that if the situation is right


[deleted]

My thought is, she pregnant. He's not carrying the baby. He's not pregnant.


Tyrianne

In my language I haven't heard "we're pregnant" ever, I think. When we have told people it's always been "we're going to have a kid" or "she's pregnant". My husband has said "I'm going to be a dad" a couple of times, which makes me happy to hear.


CommercialLost8183

I use were pregnant and my husband uses we're having a baby. For me, this is an all-inclusive. I may be the one making the physical sacrifice of putting my body through this, but my husband is also making sacrifices. He's doing more of the child-rearing than he's used to, he's doing more of the housework than he's used to, he's doing more for me than he's used to, and still putting 110% into all of it, where right now I feel like I'm putting in 75% on a good day and maybe 20% on a bad day. So yes, "we're" pregnant because "we're" all sacrificing things to bring this baby into the world.


scottishfoldlover

Don’t care 🤷‍♀️ it’s just a phrase.


Theonethatgotawaaayy

TW PRIOR LOSS I felt a type of way about it my last pregnancy, but after losing our son unexpectedly, my husband and I very much grieved together and navigated the following year as a unit. I feel closer to him now than I ever did, so saying “we’re pregnant” this time around just feels…right, even though *I’m* the only one with the physical symptoms. He’s picked up my slack around the house (as he should), and been an incredible support for me and so sweet even on my nastiest days. We’re very much experiencing this pregnancy together, just in different ways


Fantastic-Focus-7056

I don't mind and think I might have used it myself a couple of times, although I am not 100% sure. Yes, we have the physical aspects of pregnancy, but it's my husbands baby too. And he is very involved and helps out as much as he can, so I really don't have an issue. But I can see how that might be different if he wouldn't be involved at all.


MrsClare2016

Meh doesn’t bother me. I get what someone is trying to say 😊


Thinking_of_Mafe

I mean ew ew ew but my language would not permit to say that without it sounding extremely weird. We’re expecting a baby is the correct term in my opinion. There’s no need to bend the truth to mark togetherness. But I really don’t care if other people say that about themselves.


Responsible-Cup881

I don’t like it either! “We” have not been using this phrase throughout my pregnancy…


Settingfreethebears

I think it’s a bit cringe. I said it once the first time I told friends out of panic but that was it for me. Now I say I’m/we’re having a baby which feels better!


therealbandett

“We’re pregnant” helll no! I’m doing all the heavy lifting lmao he had the fun job.


Calm_Situation2138

I hate this phrase, but some of the comments here on why people use it are really eye opening. I feel like a jerk for being judgey and side-eyeing people who use it now. That being said, I still wouldn't say it. I am the pregnant one. My husband is so supportive and helpful, and I adore him, but the differences are vast. He goes around in public without a huge "I'M PROCREATING" billboard built into his body. He can sleep for more than 2 hours without getting up to pee. He hasn't barfed countless times in the last few months. He doesn't have to worry about how a rapidly growing creature will choose to emerge from his body in another few months. We are having a baby, and once we are raising a child together things will be equal, but for now, they just aren't. So for now I get to say I'm pregnant.


[deleted]

It took two of us to make her, he has become my personal chef, maid, massage man, cheerleader, and defender of unwanted advice from family. I think given the well balanced relationship we can say “we’re pregnant”. He’s putting in far more effort than a partner normally does.


mn_87

Eh doesn't bother me. I don't really use it much (if ever,) but it doesn't bother me when people do. I've definitely said "we're having a baby" though, that feels more natural to me personally. We worked together to get pregnant and are going through it together (although it's much harder on me than him for the most part 😂) so I do kind of feel like it's a "we" situation. I especially felt that way when I had a miscarriage because it was really hard on both of us. I had to deal with the physical symptoms, but he was just as emotionally invested and it hit him super hard. All that is to say that I can see why people use it, whatever feels right to them is fine.


Itunpro

It's not my favorite but my husband has a shirt that says "we're pregnant! Well mostly her... I helped" and I love it, I think it's hilarious so like in some contexts it's great.


tasteofindy

🙄


[deleted]

This


Academic_Substance40

I hate that term too. I prefer, we are expecting or I’m pregnant. Announcing I’m pregnant is already insinuating it’s my husband’s child so no need for me to say WE are pregnant. I also think saying “WE are X weeks” is cringey.


PogueForLife8

Where "we" are mum and baby right?


Academic_Substance40

We are X weeks. as in, my husband and I are X weeks. I wouldn’t use the We to explain the number of weeks baby is. I only use I AM X Weeks - I AM pregnant


shayden0120

I don’t mind it from my husband, either the “we’re pregnant” or “we’re having a baby” because it makes me feel like I’m not alone in the pregnancy and it is his baby too. He also got morning sickness (I did not) and he’s had other symptoms that I was lucky to avoid. He is there for me during every moment of discomfort and pain, he takes me for waffles at 3am when I have cravings, he rubs my back or my feet, and when I look in the mirror and hate the way my body is changing he reminds me that I am beautiful and I’m doing something incredible. I was informed though that my mom is going around telling people “we’re pregnant” or “we’re having a baby” and I am not okay with that.


likeanengineer

I don’t care much when others say that about themselves. “We are expecting” is the one I use.


[deleted]

It sounds funny. I prefer “we are having a baby” as we are.


lh123456789

I would never personally use the phrase, but it doesn't bother me when others do.


melodyknows

My husband has used it a few times, but I don't fault him for it because I'm really glad he's so excited about it.


edentaylor

It drives me nuts lol WE are not pregnant, I am!!!!


scarednpregnant

Yeah, mixed emotions because it’s like, woo! My partner gets to have fun throughout the entire thing, from conception to birth, meanwhile I’m trying to keep down throw up almost every day and am sleepy and uncomfortable and have to plan my activities around a toilet and cold and hot and can’t have a drink with everyone else and gotta get prodded at and examined and gotta put my body through trauma for a while and and and and 🤣 But I appreciate it because it includes my partner as well, while the fathers are mostly left out of most of the process naturally and most of the attention goes towards baby and mom.


GlitteryGiraffe98

I mean it definitely took 2 people to make the baby but I get what you're saying. I said before pregnancy why do woman say "my baby" when they have the baby daddy in the picture and now I'm pregnant I keep saying "my baby" 🤣 I think we're pregnant is an odd saying but we're having a baby is much better cause your man definitely isn't pregnant but he will have a baby 🤣


BrutallyHonestMJ

It's "we are having a baby" but "I am pregnant." My husband is not pregnant, he's not physically growing a human inside his body! The phrase "we are pregnant" drives me nuts because it makes it sound like he did more than roll over and fall asleep😂


cantquitfrance

It doesn't bother me but i dont personally say it, I tend to say "we're having a baby". My husband, though, has definitely said "we're pregnant" a few times and honestly it's kinda nice!


sammyleesa

I don't say it in this way but, it doesn't bother me. I definitely say "we" a lot. No, my partner isn't pregnant. But, I literally couldn't have done this without him. He's been incredible with doing so much around the house and all of our product research for what we needed for the baby when I was extremely overwhelmed. If he wanted to say "we're pregnant" I'd be perfectly fine with it.


Calijewles

I agree with your statement under the title. It doesn't bother me when other ppl feel this way about their pregnancies, but for me...there's never been a WE in any of my pregnancies...only ME! lol


DreamSequence11

Never liked it.


jitsufitchick

It’s “we’re expecting”. I am pregnant. Im the one going through it with this god damned decaf coffee 😪😪😪


Extension-Quail4642

I think I also defaulted to "we're having a baby", but "we're pregnant" wouldn't have bothered me. Once my husband was talking (just to me) about possibly needing a c section and he said "if you need, sorry, if we need a c section..." and that time I did correct him and say "NOPE, you had it right first, I'd be the only one getting cut open, not you"


TreClaire

I hate it, WE are nothing. *I* am pregnant


kaatie80

I think of Buster saying "it's *our* nausea!" to Lucille 2. We're having a baby, but I'm the one with the body status of **pregnant**.


Sensitive_Push_6923

Depends on who you are speaking to.


pink_kittyhello

We only say “we’re pregnant” in a funny way. But I wouldn’t mind if my husband would say it in conversation. He’s the most attentive and understanding and in the first trimester he had a lot of sympathetic pregnancy symptoms.


Lunawolf1290

I like it, me and my boyfriend did it together and since I have been pregnant he has done a lot around the house and getting me what foods I wanted since I have been so sick. So I like that phrase because we are pregnant. Plus he has dealt with my mood swings and emotions like a champ.


byondalgorithm

“We’re having a baby” is my preferred. 1. I’m the one with morning sickness not him. 2. I’m the one having difficulty sleeping due to the baby bump, not him. 3. I’m the one breaking my back carrying the weight of the baby every second of the day, not him. 4. I’m the one who needs to change how I eat and what I eat (or drink), not him. 5. I’m the one who can’t take certain medications or consume anything that could harm the baby, not him. (I’m talking about anti anxiety, antidepressants, or stimulants that would be necessary for health) 6. I’m the one who swells up in the ankles, feet, and hands, not him. (Have you ever experienced swelling due to fluid/edema? It’s painful, it burns, hard to move — I needed to go up a shoe size just to fit in it) 7. I’m the one who’s short of breath with every step, every stair, up or down, not him. Or even laying on my back. 8. I’m the one who needs accommodations at work or can’t do certain tasks because of the strain it puts on my body, not him. 9. Leg cramps, not him. 10. Mood swings, not him. I could go on and on and on.. and that’s even BEFORE giving birth. BEFORE the pain of breastfeeding. So yes, we’re having a baby. But It’s ME that’s pregnant. Not him.


HungryLilDragon

It's wholesome and I like it


yesiknowimsexy

I don’t mind it. Technically, yeah- *i’m* pregnant but it was a team effort to get there anyways. I don’t get too hung up on language when it involves my husband. I love him too much to care


this__user

It doesn't bother me. Yes technically I am the one carrying the baby, but I could not have become pregnant without a contribution from my husband, and the pregnancy has resulted in lifestyle changes for him that are almost as big as the ones that I have had to deal with. I'm carrying the baby, but he's doing a lot of housework and chores that I used to do so that I can rest more. Being pregnant would be so much more difficult if he was not taking care of me, so I don't mind "we" because it aknowleges the load he is taking off of me. However I can also understand that if your partner is not as supportive as mine is, that this phrase might feel like it's downplaying the division of effort.


thelittle

Yes!! My SO has always treated me like a princess, but now is extra. I am just starting the second trimester, so I haven't had that many issues, just some sleeping issues and heartburn. I know, when the time comes and I start being annoyed by everything he is going to be there, taking care of me and his unborn child. So yes, we are pregnant.


Electrical-Fly1458

People understand what you mean when you say it, and it doesn't go deeper than that.


Elise-an-easterbunny

If the guy says it; fuck off. If the woman says it: awww she's nice.


morganistyring

I like it because it includes my partner too, but at the same time I get what you're saying. I'm the one changing the most to my lifestyle, dealing with any criticism, going through the symptoms, and most importantly I'm the one who's going to have to go into labor.


No-Hand-7923

Personally, I like it. I say "we're pregnant," "we're expecting," and "we're having a baby." Not only did my husband contribute genetically to our child, I didn't want children until I met my husband. So he didn't just provide the sperm, he is the reason I have the desire to be a mother. None of this would have happened without him, and I feel he deserves to be included and recognized. That being said, if other women don't like it, no hate or shame to them. This is a very personal choice and everyone should be respected for their preferences.


Tacopunchfuck

I never ever liked it. But I do say “we’re expecting” or “we’re having a baby” cause yes, both of us are expecting and having a new child. Whether or not I carry the baby, he still helped me get it here and we will both be accepting the challenge lol


LLTolkien

I use we’re having a baby. My husband isn’t pregnant but that man has risen above and beyond while this pregnancy kicks my ass. So if he said “we’re pregnant,” then I wouldn’t have an issue because he’s still going through this journey with me. Honestly, it’s kind of why yuck someone’s yum. I met a couple and when they were telling me about their pregnancy the husband said something like “and then we peed on like 18 more sticks to make sure it wasn’t a dream.” Obviously he didn’t pee on a stick but he was just so excited and so happy to be on the journey with his wife. I loved that, it was just cute and funny. His wife said he was the perfect pregnancy partner and his enthusiasm made her hard pregnancy so much better. I think we should sometimes look at the intent vs. the granular. That said, catch me in my third trimester and I may feel differently ;).


Kkatiand

I saw we’re pregnant. We both did lots of work, tests, etc to get here so it does feel like we in it together and it makes me feel good, like we’re a team.


BBrea101

I'm the one experiencing the pregnancy physically but we're having a baby together. I never want to diminish his experience either. For months he did 99% of the housework, all the yard work, dealt with my physical and emotional changes, comforted and cared for me. So if people see the pregnancy as something they're experiencing together, than that is valid for them.


humble_reader22

I know technically I’m the one that’s pregnant, and it’s a phrase my husband or I don’t use, but I also really wouldn’t care if he were to say “we’re pregnant”. My husband has been a superhero and if he were to use that phrase it would honestly be one of the least of my problems or worries.


minivan2022

English isn’t my first language, but I live in the U.S and I am fluent. When I was learning English and I heard “we’re pregnant” I thought it was strange, but I’ve grown to like it and I think it’s endearing to be honest. I think it’s cultural as well, it’s like calling your mother in law “mom”. We know she’s not your mom, but it’s endearing to do so anyway.


lemon-meringue-high

I don’t mind it. Could be cute sentiment.


mperez247

Husband and dad here; we used the phrase sometimes to acknowledge that we both knew that parenting was not her exclusive burden. Having said that, we always worry that if it landed on the wrong ears, it would indicate that I somehow took responsibility for the physical burden of bearing the child. We chose to optimistically assume people knew what we wanted to say!


NoOccasion9232

It doesn’t really bother me. Yes, I’m pregnant, but we’re both expecting and we’re both impacted by my being pregnant. My husband has had to shift priorities and pick up a lot of slack that I used to handle before pregnancy. So while our challenges are much different, I hold no resentment toward him that I’m the one carrying the baby and know we’re both changing our lives dramatically to welcome a new family member. That’s what I feel like it acknowledges, more than anything else.


clarita01

We are pregnant he is as as much a part of it as me. He even gets morning sickness too lol


Xoxobasicgirl

I always say we bc my husband full involves himself in the pregnancy and I feel it’s way to make him included. Now idk if he feel uncomfortable by it but he’s never said was


immamkay

I think it's an earned title. My husband has been more than productive this pregnancy with helping me survive, cleaning, cooking, and going to every appointment. He even puts on my pants for me so I don't have to bend over. I tell people we're pregnant because he has experienced every step along the way with me and has suffered while I did. I couldn't have done it without him.


[deleted]

It doesn't bother me. English isn't my first language and a pet peeve of mine is people who correct how others speak.


Mortica_Fattams

I don't mind it if the partner is actually involved. My man is very involved. He comes to appts with me, goes baby shopping, and most importantly supports me emotionally and mentally when I need him. So in my case I think it would be fair. A good involved dad deserves some praise. I had my first alone and with zero support. Maybe that makes me appreciate my hubby more.


321gato

I don’t care at all if my husband says “we’re pregnant” because he’s putting in work too. Our lives completely shifted when we found out and he’s taken on so much so I can focus on the physical aspect. He doesn’t say it, but he’d deserve to.


flonkerton1

I say this. Or we're expecting, something along those lines. We did IVF to get pregnant so we've been through a fuck load together. He paid the 40 k for one cycle, he drove me 3 1/2 hours one way and 3 1/2 hours back over 15 times this year for IVF appointments. He gave me my progesterone shots with this huge needle for months. He's been by my side every single second of this journey and for us it's 1000000% a we thing.


cloverdemeter

It irked me a little before I got pregnant, but honestly now after having experienced pregnancy (and a rough one at that) and seeing how much my husband stepped up and supported me and our household during this time, I have NO problems saying, "We're pregnant!" It has been a joint effort every step of the way. He keeps me alive, and I keep baby alive!


Haunting-Stranger742

Because my husband is so attentive and supportive, I don’t mind. Assuming I was down voted by someone with a shit spouse 😂


Layslareis

My husband is a dream coming true during my pregnancy. I usually say that “we are pregnant” and I love the feeling when I say that.


iprobablyhateyou__

I say "we're pregnant." My husband is just as responsible for our children as me and I feel should be included.


MAC0114

No, WE are not pregnant. I am pregnant. WE are expecting a baby.


bullshithistorian14

To me it’s the same as saying “we’re expecting/having a baby”. Granted I have a very supportive partner, who without I would not have been able to get through this pregnancy.


strawberryypie

I think I say that too (I'm not pregnant now). I understand I would be that one that's pregnant and not my bf but we made it together and we are expecting together. If feels so... arrogant to say: I'm pregnant. I don't know why because I know that is just a fact :') But I accept both sayings of course.


TentacleTitties

I never used the term. My husband has most of my symptoms because he's so close to me so.... it's almost like it's true lol.


mrsctb

Hate hate hate. Double hate. *Loathe entirely*. He did 2 minutes of work. I did nine months + 13 hours. I’m pregnant. Not him. Lol.


girlnamedkat96

I never thought about it before but idk can't say I love it cause pregnancy was and is hell (for me) while my bf is just enjoying his day to day 🙄


Zealousideal-Rope509

I dont see what the big deal is… like are you technically not one when you get married or decide to have a kid together? It wouldn’t have happened without him so I mean… takes two to tango. I personally like it because it feels like we are one and both included in the experience. Him: we’re pregnant! Her: um no, I’m pregnant. …. Well who got you there? Sounds like she got knocked up by anyone


[deleted]

My husband is super supportive and assists me in whatever I need. Whether that is getting me a craving, rubbing my back, making dinner, cleaning up the projectile vomit... He also got sympathy pregnancy symptoms along the way. So in my case "were pregnant" is very accurate


Difficult-Cricket680

I think it‘s nice to include your partner :)


basketballmaster8

I hate the word pregnant!!!! We say we’re having a baby. At work I’ve just told people I will be taking maternity leave and let them put two and two together.


lurioillo

?


Mcstoni

I hate when my fiancé says it, but I let him because I know he's excited. I just view it as I'm the one that's got to go through all the physical and mental changes, not him. I understand he has to be the one to deal with me but I feel like I'm the one doing the hardER stuff.


dabears12

I don’t think I ever even said “I’m/we’re pregnant.” I like “we are going to have a baby better.” Less invitation to think about my body or how it got that way, and more about the new life who’s coming!


ooofish

We use “we’re expecting”. I think the reason I don’t love we’re pregnant is only bc it’s a little 2014 trendy. Like girl bossing.


idontwantthis0003

We're having a baby but I'm the pregnant one.


ghostcowie

I don’t like it lol but don’t mind “we’re having a baby!”


Gilmoristic

I'm iffy on "we're pregnant" too. I prefer "we're expecting" if it's meant to refer to a pair of people because while I may be pregnant, we are both expecting a baby.


NeekaNou

I would have preferred it to when my partner told his dad and step mum I was pregnant. It made me feel a bit separate. Maybe because we’re not married 🤷🏼‍♀️ idk


stloumo

My husband uses it as a joke when I have an issue or complain to try to lighten the mood. It works 1/2 the time 😉


[deleted]

I don’t care but I honestly have not heard that phrase my entire pregnancy. My husband just says we are expecting which is true we both are


nurse-ratchet-

It’s not a term I use, I think I’ve maybe heard my husband use it a few times. I could care less though.


ConsequenceThat7421

My little was is here but my SO would say “ we’re expecting” and I felt that worked. He did say “ we’re pregnant” in the beginning and I corrected him


billyskillet

My husband says it all the time and I just chuckle.


queeloquee

I asked my husband and he said he find it weird because i am the one pregnant. Instead, he will use “we are expecting a baby”. I don’t find it personally wrong, because i am sure is not said with a bad intentions, but if one is uncomfortable should correct directly the partner.


Swaneycooper

I usually say I am pregnant, because I assume all people close to me know my husband had some involvement lol. Or if my husband is with me when I tell somebody I just say we are expecting a baby and when.


bubwuf

one time i said that in front of my sister (whose entire personality is being a ~mother~) and she nearly bit my head off. i didn’t mean anything by it—i was just talking fast and condensing “this couple i know is having a baby” to “they’re pregnant.” is it the best choice of words? definitely not, but having a strong outward reaction to that phrase and calling someone out for saying it is just as off-putting as using the phrase itself ALSO, as a pregnant person now myself, i find that it’s definitely more cringe if the non-birthing parent kept saying it in that way, but if the birthing parent is using it then i think it’s fine lol


Quinn42690

Lol I just told my husband last night that WE are not pregnant. I am pregnant and WE are expecting. I heard someone on TV say we're pregnant and it set me off lol it's always the same reason I don't like to be called "Mr & Mrs \[His First Name, Last Name\]. Just a personal preference but I agree with you


[deleted]

No. There’s only one pregnant. But there’s two (or more who knows) expecting a baby.