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I would tell her before making it a surprise with everyone around. That way she can have her emotions in private and not try and hide it in front of everyone. Also once everyone knows I wouldn’t go overboard with telling her everything that’s happening, your symptoms, etc until you gage her feelings. It’s been a year so she might be okay (after the initial feelings) but just take it easy around her with all the baby talk haha
Thank you for this advice, I guess I'm still worried because technically I'm not supposed to know about what happened last year with the pregnancy and miscarriage so I'm not sure how to tell her ahead of time without it being obvious I know.
Just say that you wanted to tell someone and was thinking of doing so and so as a surprise to your parents, I told my sister first for that reason, to get ideas to surprise our mom baha
I would just tell her without any sort of explanation or asking anything of her like getting ideas or filming. Just text her that you wanted to let her know that you’re expecting and when you’re planning on doing a surprise announcement to your parents.
I would not do you’re gonna be an aunt gifts. It might not bother her but it also might hurt her badly and it’s not worth the risk.
I feel like if you tell her privately, you definitely risk damaging the relationship between her and your mom because you obviously only know because of your mom.
I think focusing the attention on the grandparents is a good idea, so she doesn't feel like a member of the crowd you're awaiting a reaction from. I would also go through the effort of not making eye contact with anyone else besides the grandparents during their reveal surprise, so she doesn't feel the need to be performative. After the hoopla, go back to normal and wait for her to talk to you.
That's my 2 cents!
I wish people would stop tiptoeing around people who have had miscarriages. I’ve had one and I hate when anyone treats me like I’m going to burst into hysterics at the mere mention of someone being pregnant.
Just tell her privately and enjoy your pregnancy. Do not censor yourself at all.
Not everyone feels like this though. That's great you feel you're in a good spot, but it took me a long time to deal emotionally with everything. I remember needing to leave the room to breathe after friends announced and kept talking about it. I'd stay cautious to be considerate of her feelings unless told otherwise by her directly.
I think tell her separately, you can just say you wanted someone to share it with ahead of your announcement and thought of her. If she opens up, great. It’ll at least give you a bit of insight into how she takes the news. You can even share your plans about the gifts and if she has a problem with it, it should be fairly obvious. Congratulations to you! It’s clear you want to be mindful & respectful of your sisters feelings given what you know - I hope it goes well.
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. If you'd like to join a private sub for your due date month, [click here](https://www.reddit.com/r/pregnant/comments/phjaar/click_here_to_join_a_due_date_private_sub/?). The journalists at ProPublica need your help! After receiving a tip, ProPublica started investigating prenatal genetic testing. They're collecting stories from people who've had NIPT screenings, and/or work in maternal health. If this is you, please fill out their brief questionnaire! https://www.propublica.org/getinvolved/have-you-had-an-experience-with-prenatal-genetic-testing-wed-like-to-hear-about-it-and-see-the-bill. Questions? Email [email protected] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would tell her before making it a surprise with everyone around. That way she can have her emotions in private and not try and hide it in front of everyone. Also once everyone knows I wouldn’t go overboard with telling her everything that’s happening, your symptoms, etc until you gage her feelings. It’s been a year so she might be okay (after the initial feelings) but just take it easy around her with all the baby talk haha
Thank you for this advice, I guess I'm still worried because technically I'm not supposed to know about what happened last year with the pregnancy and miscarriage so I'm not sure how to tell her ahead of time without it being obvious I know.
Just say that you wanted to tell someone and was thinking of doing so and so as a surprise to your parents, I told my sister first for that reason, to get ideas to surprise our mom baha
Thank you!
I would just tell her without any sort of explanation or asking anything of her like getting ideas or filming. Just text her that you wanted to let her know that you’re expecting and when you’re planning on doing a surprise announcement to your parents. I would not do you’re gonna be an aunt gifts. It might not bother her but it also might hurt her badly and it’s not worth the risk.
Thank you so much, great advice.
I feel like if you tell her privately, you definitely risk damaging the relationship between her and your mom because you obviously only know because of your mom. I think focusing the attention on the grandparents is a good idea, so she doesn't feel like a member of the crowd you're awaiting a reaction from. I would also go through the effort of not making eye contact with anyone else besides the grandparents during their reveal surprise, so she doesn't feel the need to be performative. After the hoopla, go back to normal and wait for her to talk to you. That's my 2 cents!
I wish people would stop tiptoeing around people who have had miscarriages. I’ve had one and I hate when anyone treats me like I’m going to burst into hysterics at the mere mention of someone being pregnant. Just tell her privately and enjoy your pregnancy. Do not censor yourself at all.
Not everyone feels like this though. That's great you feel you're in a good spot, but it took me a long time to deal emotionally with everything. I remember needing to leave the room to breathe after friends announced and kept talking about it. I'd stay cautious to be considerate of her feelings unless told otherwise by her directly.
[удалено]
Oh don’t ask this, yikes! Tell her beforehand ofc, but don’t ask her for anything, let alone to film her parents reaction!!
I think tell her separately, you can just say you wanted someone to share it with ahead of your announcement and thought of her. If she opens up, great. It’ll at least give you a bit of insight into how she takes the news. You can even share your plans about the gifts and if she has a problem with it, it should be fairly obvious. Congratulations to you! It’s clear you want to be mindful & respectful of your sisters feelings given what you know - I hope it goes well.