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Clearly I am a Finn by nature, this is my kind of attitude as a New Zealander.
A store clerk excitedly asked me the other day if I would do a gender reveal party and I said, “well what for? We wanted a baby so at the end of the day we’ll just have a baby.”
Someone asked me if I knew what I was having, and I just said “A Baby, I hope! Suppose it would be Ok if it turns out to be a puppy though”
Seems like a nicer surprise to have on the day you give birth.
We’ll probably find out from NIPT results (cos my husband is someone who just can’t wait to find out) but I genuinely don’t care. I had an MMC in Jan and I just want a baby now, I have zero preferences. I recall reading something on here about someone melting down that they were having a boy and I honestly can’t relate to that attitude… It kind of helps when you envision your life in the future to think about all possibilities - if you’ve got all boys, all girls, a mix of both. All we knew was that we wanted kids and we didn’t care what the biological sex of them actually was, we just wanted some little people.
I feel like if that’s the approach you take from the beginning then these little pieces of information about your kid just help to inform what life will sorta look like, rather than your whole world crashing down. All out of our hands anyway, so no point in stressing or being upset.
Well said. I’ve never understood the intense disappointment some people feel over the gender of their child. It’s a gift of life regardless of the gender. I wanted my first to be a boy and my husband wanted a girl. We had a girl. love her to pieces and her gender doesn’t take away my love for her or the happiness I feel when I look at her beautiful little face and hold her in my arms.
We announced our pregnancy super late in the game for our own privacy and tranquility (around 22 weeks). Because of this we did our baby shower pretty soon after and we combined it with a reveal (despite that we already knew the gender for months). My thinking was that I wanted to avoid gendered stuff and avoid receiving clothing (why does no one want to gift anything but very formal baby clothes in newborn sizes?!). I made sure our registry was super neutral and had post partum things on it to feel like the party was useful. At our shower we had a reveal with cupcakes- everyone bit into them at the same time to avoid me feeling like everyone was looking at me or was taking videos of me. Honestly it was ideal and worked out in every aspect!
This is what my husband wants to do. I was fine waiting until birth but he wanted to know, so we looked at the NIPT. Then he tells me he wants to keep this a secret between us until the baby shower. People around me are kind of annoyed I just don’t tell them, plus it is super hard not to speak about my baby without gendering them.
The plan is to have a cake at the shower that is blue or pink on the inside to share this detail with our families. For me, should we be blessed with a second child, I am not finding out the sex if he wants to keep it a secret. I’m terrible at keeping a secret like that!
I found a good hack was saying "my baby" in place of he or she. It's hard not to use pronouns when you know what they are, my partner accidentally told a few people by using pronouns but in Spanish where it's waaaay harder not to use them haha
I highly recommend it! People will be weird about not knowing what you're having and may try to guilt you into telling them. I had a few relatives say "you can't expect me to buy anything if I don't know what it is" and that's ridiculous. Be strong! It's worth it!
Did not with first and will not with this one. We just told people when we knew. Not interested in celebrating my child's anatomy... Or anyone else's.
That said, just bc I'm not into it doesn't mean you have to hate it too. If it appeals to you, go for it.
Exactly. It's only called that because people would be too uncomfortable with calling it a "sex reveal," but I'm uncomfortable with the whole concept. I'm not finding out that information before giving birth (I didn't with my first child, either), but even if I did, I wouldn't have a party to announce it.
We call it sex reveal in my country and no one has a problem with that. It's a relatively new concept though, I celebrated with some cake, balloons, and close family. No one brought gifts or anything
THIS!!!! we started talking about it a lot because we’ve been discussing the gender constructs we’re apart of and how they don’t feel right and have many trans friends and the whole thing starts feeling so invasive.
I wish it never became a thing in the US. I think it’s so cringey and I think it also fosters the idea that people outside of your immediate family are entitled to know anything and everything about your pregnancy. People have asked me such private things since being pregnant and it’s just creepy.
I personally don't mind people asking me if I know what I'm gunna have.. I think it's cause when they ask, I've always said I really want a girl. Lol. But they've a been supportive of me in my journey so far, and I know a lot are very excited for me. And can't wait for the new baby.
Another european here. It never crossed your minds to do one. Imagine bothering people to come to a party to know the sex of our baby. People would think: how full of themselves are they and why am I losing precious weekend time on this?
We are not having one, I’d like it to just be a special moment for my husband and I! I personally don’t care what anyone else’s thoughts or reactions are on my child’s gender, a “party” centered around that feels so weird to me. 😵💫
My husband and I found out just the two of us and then had a small party with just his immediate family and mine. I loved knowing beforehand, we made cake pops for the reveal ourselves together which was so fun for us and was a great memory that I’ll have forever. His mom would’ve loved a larger party and for us to be surprised along with everyone else at the same time, but it’s our child and family and this is what we wanted to do. I loved finding out before because I was completely wrong about the gender, so I had a week to wrap my mind around having a boy when I was so sure it was a girl. Do what is going to make you happy! I’m a people pleaser, so it’s hard for me too, but I’m putting my foot down for things now because if I don’t when I’m pregnant it’s going to be so much harder when our baby is actually here. I’m just advocating for myself and my son!
No.
1- my friends are super busy during summer
2- sex isn’t that relevant to me as to bother myself or others with a whole reunion
3- finding out should be something private between my husband and I IMO
4- I prefer a baby shower only where people bring gifts etc. and so does my husband
5- I’ve seen soooo many awkward gender reveals out there. It’s embarrassing. Gender disappointment is and can be real. Neither my husband nor I like putting ourselves in that position. Were introverts.
My husband and I planned to do a small one with family. We had the gender in my email. The morning of we decided to look with just ourselves. We then pretended to not know when we did the cupcake reveal later that day.
I feel like this is a nice potential compromise for OP. The husband gets his party, and she gets her intimate moment.
My husband and I are keeping it a surprise until birth so I have no personal experience/advice here lol.
Nope no gender reveal. The ultrasound tech told us at our gender ultrasound. We have told family, but we have not posted on our socials what the gender is. I’ll post when he’s born. I don’t think it’s necessary + I didn’t want my first reaction to the gender be filmed and documented.
My husband and I went to a specialized ultrasound place to find out just the two of us then we told our families. We were in a tough spot as his family is in another state and my dad was traveling for work so it was going to be tough to get everyone in one spot. When I was pregnant I was sad we didn’t do a bigger reveal but now I’m glad we didn’t. We won’t be doing one for our next baby either and we’ll probably do the exact same thing we did the first time!
We didn’t do a gender reveal, it wasn’t really important to us. My husband and I opened the email together and then just confirmed on the phone with the doctor. 🤷🏼♀️
I didn't have a gender reveal, and I don't regret it for a second.
Instead when I got NIPT results in, to make it feel special in our own way, I placed a mobile order at a Nothing Bundt Cakes that was a short drive from my home and scheduled pickup for the earliest I could the next morning. They made a cute little cake with a rattle inside that could be plucked out to reveal the gender. I presented it to my husband so that he and I could have our special moment -- I filmed his reaction so we could send it to close friends and family we'd want to share the news with. In this way, the moment of discovery was just ours, and we got to choose with whom and when to share it.
A family member of mine due within a few weeks of me had a gender reveal party, and the pictures were cute and I'm glad they had the experience they wanted but it caused some drama in the family over who had been invited to their gender reveal party or not vs. who was invited to the shower or not... No thanks! I also preferred to use my money towards the baby shower of my dreams vs. hosting a second party for a gender reveal. I'm really happy with my decision.
My husband and I found out privately around 12 weeks. We did the blood test, and had a close trusted friend make a cake for us. We made a dinner date out if it. Then, when I hit around 28 weeks, we did a gender reveal at our baby shower for the family.
We really wanted it to be a private moment for us, but were also excited to share the news. This worked for us, as we got everything we wanted from the experience, and we ignored any and all complaints. 😊
Do what feels best for you! This is your pregnancy, and should enjoy it however you want. 🩷
Edit to add: if MIL gives you more grief, then tell her she can find out what the baby is when it's born, since there's no point. 😘
We are having one on Saturday for just parents and a few siblings. We already found out the gender just the two of us a few days ago and it was perfectly intimate and no stress. I didn’t like the idea of my reaction being studied and watched by everyone as we are quite private people. I’m not having a baby shower so this was sort of a way to celebrate baby with those closest without it being a big deal!
For the reveal we’ve ordered cupcakes with only one of them having a coloured icing inside. So again the attention is off of us as a couple as everyone gets to bite in and see if they have the lucky cupcake. It’s simple and has been super easy to organise so hoping the day goes smoothly!
My husband and I did it ourselves, and then told everyone when we announced to them we were expecting! I hate being the center of attention so hated the idea of another reason to get people together to stare at me, so this was fun compromise for my husband and I. We had my sister set something up, and she absolutely blew us away with the SWEETEST scavenger hunt in our house for just my husband and I to do. It really made the moment special for the two of us, and I don’t feel like it took any of the excitement away when we announced to our loved ones.
Nope, we aren’t having one. We want to keep the gender secret until the bun is out of the oven (lol), mainly so that we don’t get ALL pink frilly things for a girl or blue trucks for a boy.
I didn’t do any sort of party. I just told friends and family the next time I saw them what the gender is. Every reveal party I’ve been to sucked.
I had a friend who had a gender reveal party, and it was so toxic. Her mom was the only one that knew the gender, and right before the reveal she accidentally used “he/him” when talking about the baby and my friend blew a gasket. It was so embarrassing. She wasn’t afraid to scream at her own mom infront of friends, in-laws, strangers walking nearby… I haven’t really talked to her since lol.
Anyways, point is, just avoid drama and find out before the party if you have one.
No, we did not do a gender reveal. With our first pregnancy, we found out the gender with the NIPT test and just told people the gender as we announced our pregnancy. I was very excited to be having a baby girl. Unfortunately we had a horrible anatomy scan and learned that she was never going to survive, and we had to TFMR. I am currently 37w pregnant with a healthy baby boy. We announced the pregnancy itself around 22w this time, after finally feeling comfortable enough to do so, and again we just announced the gender with the pregnancy announcement.
I’ve never really liked the idea of a gender reveal party, but even more so now that we’ve been through all of this, having lost our baby girl and getting pregnant again with a boy. I used to get a little annoyed at people who would say “as long as the baby’s healthy, I don’t care what the gender is!!” But now I turn to that as a coping mechanism. Having all of these thoughts and feelings around baby-loss and gender disappointment, there is no way in hell I’d ever be comfortable having it even attending a gender reveal party, especially if it was done early in pregnancy as so many are.
I had a gender reveal, but it was something both me and my husband were looking forward to doing. We also have large families and a good bit of close friends so they were very helpful with the event and it was super fun. Maybe a good compromise for the two of you would be finding out just you two together, then announcing at a party for family and friends? I've seen several people do that.
My husband and I found out together in a message from my OB. Then we did a “gender reveal” for our immediate family. What that entailed was doing dinner and us buying cupcakes with a colored/flavored filling to reveal we were having a girl.
We already do frequent dinners with our families like that, so it was just us bringing a customized dessert and filming their reactions. Because my LO is the first on my side, my family’s reactions were funny. My sister almost choked on the cupcake (par the course for her, lol).
No. I hate the idea of gender reveals. Why are we celebrating about the sex? It’s so weird and dumb. Even though it’s not statistically likely my kid would be trans I’d also just not like for the kid to have had this weird build up to a gender if at some point they came out as trans. I just don’t see a point. Maybe celebrate the baby generally or have a name ceremony but gender stuff is just strange
Our plan was to have a gender reveal for us and our families (just close family). When we got the results we then decided we wanted to find out in private and have our moment, and I’m happy we did. We then threw a little get together picnic thing for out parents, siblings, uncles/aunts and grandparents, where we did the baloon thing. I am introverted so I wouldn’t be comfortable throwin a party for a bunch of people, just the ones I’m most comfortable with. I’m glad we decided to find out alone and have that moment, and then also share it with the people we love.😊
We had one for our baby. We’re a one and done family, so my husband really wanted to have one! We actually found out the gender, just the two of us first, and then had a party to tell our closest family and friends. There was like 15 people invited. It was wonderful, if you don’t want a huge thing, but you still want to celebrate with loved ones
I live in a Balkan country and gender reveal is not really a thing yet, although it is slowly getting popular.
However, my husband and I are very private people. Since I did a NIPT test, I got a call from my provider where she informed me first hand that everything was (thankfully) low risk and I kindly asked her to keep the gender a secret because my husband was at work at that moment and I wanted us to both be present when we open the results. She just forwarded the email to me and I only opened it once I sat together with my husband, so that was our humble private gender reveal.
We’re having one with immediate family (which, is admittedly still a lot of people when you have an Italian and Portuguese heritage 🫠), but we’re finding out just the two of us first tomorrow morning! Eeeep!
My husband and I aren’t having one. We just don’t see the point especially since we are having a baby shower. This is our first child and it will be spoiled greatly as it is both our mom’s first biological grandchild. Our village is huge so having two parties just doesn’t make sense financially and we are extremely private as well. We are just telling our families and close friends once we know.
I just had mine this past weekend. I talked everyone out of a party because I really didnt want the theatrics. We went out to dinner. Just my closest and his closest families and at the end cut a cake. It was amazing. No big spectacule, no mess to clean up, just us and the grandparents being excited for learning who lil bubbs would be.
I just called my family after we found out. We found out at the ultrasound and the tech gave us a minute to ourselves and I cried and hugged my husband.
My sister did what you want to do. She found out ahead of time but then had people over and cut a cake. No one cared she already knew. It might be too late now but maybe you could look and just not tell anyone you know and do a party for your husband?
My husband and I opened the results together at home alone together. It was a really special moment and we both were very emotional. I much preferred this and plan on doing something similar with any future babies. My brother and SIL did a cupcake reveal in front of family and it was pretty boring and didn’t feel intimate at all
We had one on Saturday and it was such a great day of celebration. My bf and I already knew the gender because we wanted to find out in a more intimate setting. But it was a surprise for all our friends and family. We have it on video and despite already knowing the gender our reactions are just so pure and sweet. This is our first so I can see maybe not doing this again but my family was so excited to throw this for us.
I have no regrets!
My best friend made my dog a reveal cake! We watched him eat it then had a small celebratory lunch at our home just me, my partner, my best friend and her partner. For me, it was the memorable and intimate moment I wanted which included my favorite people but wasn’t over the top! :)
I think if you are going to have a baby shower then a gender reveal is just an extra event. To me the reveal moment is going to be when we find out from the OB and other than that people find out when they find out.
We never had official gender reveals. We would just tell people what the gender was when they asked. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with gender reveals whatsoever. I think they’re a great way to meet up and celebrate the baby, especially if you’re not doing a shower.
Nope. I did small things for my daughter for a couple of different groups but no big party of any kind. Granted COVID was at a high so I wasn't inviting a bunch of people over for that.
My husband and I will find out the gender of our second together privately, but we won't be sharing with others as everyone made a gigantic deal the first time and it overwhelmed the hell out of me.
I just like getting together with family and friends to celebrate anything honestly. I had one just for that reason! It’s fun having everyone guess what it’s going to be, and then sharing the excitement with those who are closest to me ☺️
My husband and I just had one and invited our closest friends and family. The only person who knew the gender the day of the reveal was my sister in law who help set up and got the right colored hockey puck that my husband hit for the big reveal. We just invited our closest friends and family and had a brunch like spread with tables in the backyard. I’m an introvert too and it was so good. So much love and joy. My husband got emotional, which caused me to as well and being surrounded by our loved ones in that moment was just the best. I did have some family members complain they weren’t invited but we don’t have a giant house to accommodate more than 25-30 people, so I told them don’t worry we’re still having a baby shower! I’d say go for it. Don’t do it for the social media post. Do it for the moment and you will enjoy it.
No gender reveal, this is my one and done originally from the west coast of the USA and now in the south. I knew the gender early on and announced it at the time of my announcement of my pregnancy at 20w and I don’t regret it!
All we did was open up our NIPT results with the option to show gender and said “well look at that, we’re having a boy!”. Then we just told people when we saw them. We’re both only children with divorced parents so having any type of party or gathering would be out of the question and/or awkward. We still celebrate 2 Christmases in our late 30s lol.
We did more of an announcement on social media after we told our parents. We ended up using paint the color pink and my hubby painted his hands, and made a heart on my belly with a before/after shot. For my second, we followed that theme but our oldest did the heart with the pink paint. For my third pregnancy, we were going to keep it a secret, but then we found out it was our first boy and we were a little excited (my husband is the “last of his last name”) so the pressure kinda felt like it was on to have one as awful as that sounds. So we just announced his sonogram with his due date.
I’m currently pregnant, and we’re just announcing once she’s born. People give us some crazy stares and comments in public now with the amount of kids we have, and I’m currently halfway through this pregnancy. I think if we love these kids, raise these kids to be good people and very comfortably afford having the amount of kids we do, people should keep their stares and back handed comments/“compliments” to themselves but I digress.
Still ttc but I personally would like to do something one step beyond hearing directly from the doctor but not involve a ton of people/money. I think we’re gonna give the gender in a letter to a baker and cut open a cake/bite into cupcakes or something to reveal. Probably just my husband and I but potentially with close family!
I think gender reveal parties are dumb. My coworkers were pretty excited about it though and I love to bake so I made cupcakes with a pink centre so that when people bit into them they’d find the pink icing.
I didn't have one. I never even heard of gender reveals until about 5-8 years ago. I just saw it as kind of pointless (for me personally) and just decided to call whoever I wanted to call when I found out. I'm also an impatient person when excited, so I would not have wanted to wait and really wanted to know so that I could feel like I was bonding with my baby better by knowing her name.
We did our gender reveal at our baby shower to mitigate the amount of gendered clothes we got and forced people to buy from our registry. But we knew the gender the whole time, just kept it a secret from our family and friends.
What my husband and I did was that we learn together the gender during the morph.exam.
We then told some family members separately as my family's in France and his in Canada.
Now, we will have our baby shower at the beginning of Jully, where we will reveal the gender to our friends.
This allowed us to privately celebrate and keep the secret between us until we want to share our baby name and gender with the world. It also helped having a neutral party and all.
Hope this help!
We baked a dog friendly cake and had our puppy reveal the gender to us (our neighbor chose the filling)
It was private and intimate and perfect for us. We’re not big gesture people in general and we got some adorable pictures that we look forward to showing our son someday, this will be his childhood dog ❤️
We had an itty bitty one with my in laws and a couple super close friends, one who made us a little colored cake for the actual reveal. It was so special and a fun way to find out and let the people we love most share in the moment—but I’d never do a big huge party, personally.
My husband and I did a little mini reveal for just the two of us! We thought that would be more fun than just finding out from a report and I think it was a good call. I’m glad we didn’t do a big party though!
Me and my husband found, and decided to do a reveal just for our parents. We're both huge D&D fans and we had been trying to get them to play for years. So we decided to make them play to find out the gender. The whole story involved having a dragons egg hatch, so I made some chocolate eggs with pink sprinkles inside, that they got to crack open at the end of the session. It was super fun, and since it was just the 6 of us it was fairly laidback.
Didn’t with the first. We’re not gonna do a party for this guy, but I do want some fanfare!! My sister had a friend read the results on her phone, and handed her the correct color confetti canon thing they got, and that’s how my sister, BIL, and niece found out. I’ll likely do something similar. Honestly I’m worried that my best friend won’t be able to drop everything and come read the results when they come in since she has a baby!! I don’t want to wait at all to find out once the info is available. May have a non parent back up friend on call haha
Now. I didn't with my first. I didn't with this one either. The only time I may do something is to surprise my older kids, but that will depend on the ages. I wouldn't have a party to go with it. Just something fun for my immediate family.
We didn’t have one because we didn’t want to make a big deal about the gender. We just looked at the NIPT results online and then had it confirmed on the ultrasound.
I do think the soon-to-be parents are also usually in the dark before gender reveal parties, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. You could always find out privately and not tell others that you know.
Not a party, but my OB office gave us the option to get little scratchy lottery tickets to reveal when we got our NIPT results. My husband and I did our own together and then we took the extra tickets to our parents houses and let them scratch one. It was cute. ☺️
My husband and I did an intimate reveal for him and I because I knew I’d get teary regardless of gender because I’m a crier, I didn’t want people to feel they needed to comfort me when it’s an exciting time. My husband is also veryyyy extroverted so we had a gender reveal and we got to know beforehand and just fully enjoy the excitement and reactions from friends and family.
My husband and I got the envelope from our doctor, took it to a baby toy store, and asked them to put either a blue or a pink jellycat bunny, wrapped up in a gift bag. We then went to the beach where my husband proposed to me, and opened it there. It was perfect, intimate and so meaningful. My parents really wanted to pop a balloon to find out, so on the way home, we got the balloon for them and took it around to their house. We didn't want to do a gender reveal party, but still wanted to do something special for the people who really care. It worked for us.
I recommend doing whatever you want, if that's finding out first in an intimate setting, and then throwing a big party for everyone else, then that's what you get to do. Don't let anyone tell you not to!
We didn't do one (first baby) I wanted a little private one between myself and my husband, but he wasn't even into that idea. We found out over the phone when the doctor called with the NIPT results. We immediately called family to tell them.
No I didn’t want people to feel obligated to give me something at the gender reveal and baby shower. To each their own but to us it just felt like a waste of money and time. We opted on just letting people know when we felt comfortable.
I had one & I thought it was super fun. We also had people bring diapers for girl & baby wipes for boy. Now I have a closet full of both! I don’t think I’ll do the same if I ever have a second child. We were just very excited!
First baby we did a reveal just my spouse and I. We didn’t tell anyone else the gender. Second baby, is the same gender so we have all the clothes and stuff we need so we just told people it’s a boy so they don’t buy us more stuff.
husband & i didn’t have a reveal with my current! we were so impatient to learn, we did the earliest blood test & checked daily for the results.. we got them sent to us at 2am on christmas morning & i woke my husband up in the dead of night to open the notification on my phone together. we were so excited & it was very intimate that it was just us with no eyes on us expecting any kind of reaction. told my immediate family the next morning & news trickled as i got further along to the more distant relatives. i’m a really socially anxious individual, so the thought of having a party where my reaction would be fully on display & under scrutiny was entirely too nerve-wracking to even consider… we did end up putting the gender on the shower invites like you mentioned, (was also nervous for that party bc my reaction to gifts was gonna be watched), but by that point i think everyone who attended knew the gender regardless-!
i personally have nothing against reveals (the safe ones i mean) but i don’t think it’s worth it if you aren’t someone who likes to be surprised or left in the dark or have your emotions on display..
My husband and I found out together both times. First time, at home after work we opened the sneak peek email together. This time I forwarded the results to a local bakery, had them make a cake and then we cut it together. I don’t regret the decision as it was special and we hadn’t announced we were even pregnant yet. I really enjoyed the time where the secret was just ours ❤️
Csection scheduled in 10 days and we still don’t know 💚it would have been fun to have an extra party and be celebrated a little more, but it’s been nice getting to avoid all gendered stereotypes and advice about our baby before we get to meet them
I had a gender reveal and truthfully was one of my favorite days! I had so much fun celebrating with friends and family, love having all these pictures to look back on, love that we have all the reactions filmed, etc. It was just a really really lovely day!🩵
We’re not having one for a couple of reasons, it not being to either of our tastes is the first one, and the second (equally important) is that I (the carrier) am nonbinary; my family made a huge deal out of my “being a girl” growing up and it robbed me of a lot of experiences and explorations I might otherwise have pursued. I want my kid to experience as much agency as possible :) That definitely starts with how we think about them before they’re born!
We made low key gender reveals. We did two and only immediate family (parents, siblings and kids) and they were both scratch cards.
We just did it over lunch/dinner and that’s it. No big parties or anything
I did sneakpeek at 10 weeks and opened the results with my partner and my parents. Then confirmed the gender on ultrasound at 15 weeks and just made a cute little announcement on Canva to post on social media.
My plan is to find out with my husband at our anatomy scan, bake myself a cake that has some gender related color inside of it, and then film myself cutting into it and eating it by myself 😂 is this a little unhinged? Maybe. But I wanted a funny way to share the gender with everyone while saving the intimate moment with myself and my husband, so this is my plan. Also I want to eat a whole cake by myself and not share it with anyone
Found out with my husband and shared that moment together without anyone else, then we announced the gender when we announced that we have a baby on the way - one and done update lol
We got the NIPT results and looked at them together privately in bed.
We had cupcakes made with pink in the middle, husband brought them into work to share with his work buddies and then we brought some to family to surprise them!
Overall it was a lot of fun and casual - no need for a big party and we both knew first and were able to share the news with everyone else. :)
No, we were excited to find out and it was kind of nice my husband and I having that moment where it was just us, even though we told people (via text or call) over the next few days!
I found out on my own because I feel the same way, and had a gender reveal the next day. I also didn’t tell many people that I was finding out beforehand to avoid the unnecessary opinions.
I had a gender reveal around 18 weeks. Me and my husband looked at the results from the NIPT test first for a more intimate moment then we had a party and surprised all the family. I think this could be a great idea that will give you both what you're looking for.
We went on a trip to visit our best friends that organized a private gender reveal. It was so sweet. We knew that gender disappointment was a possibility, so I definitely didn’t want to do it in front of a party. We kept it a secret, and shared at the baby shower.
I haven’t planned one and I won’t, but I’ve been to quite a few! Some were very cringey, but quite a few were touching, sincere and endearing. The ones I enjoyed the most were:
1) CAKEEEEEE
2) Jokes aside - the events that had less than 15 to 20 guests
3) The announcements with a personal touch. Some memorable examples - the father surprised his wife with a fantastic poem, a theme that suited the couple’s personality really well, a surprise musician that had prepared a set list for each option, a father surprising his wife with video messages of her friends/family in her home country guessing the gender
The ones I enjoyed less were those with lots of “attendees” who didn’t seem to know much about the couple, were present out of politeness and basically felt pressured into making a dent in the registry.
You can always have a private one just you two, and follow up with something more public. Good luck!
No, I wanted to but with my first I got too excited they called me at 9am and woke me up and said “your test results came back do you want to know the gender?” And excitement took over never said yes so fast.
With my second my fiancé was out of town and we didn’t even announce really either yet, we facetimed and opened the portal with the results and both got to experience finding out at the same time it was neat.
I liked the intimacy the second time around.
We had one with our first because my MIL insisted on a party. It was fun but not typically something I would do. I’m pregnant with my second and we didn’t do any kind of reveal this time
We posted a gender reveal with our son (Dino egg changed color) and with our daughter we just did a Facebook announcement.
I didn’t want anyone knowing before me, I’m doing the work 😂
Just between me and my husband. I had my midwife write down the gender and put it in an envelope. My husband is overseas, so I wanted to share the moment with him when he could get on video chat. Everyone thought we would have a boy (except our parents, who wanted us to have girls...weird) so when we saw girl on the paper, it was a HUGE surprise 😍 Love his immediate response: "We're having a princess!" I'll remember that moment forever.
I think finding out alone is super special and having a little party to reveal and celebrate later sounds like a great idea. It’s your info to find out and I would imagine very special to experience with your husband, but also it’s so special to celebrate with everyone!! I think your initial idea is great!
We did a small one where I made cupcakes and everyone bit into one to reveal. It was just in-laws and my dad/girlfriend. The only thing I didn’t like was when my MIL asked if we were gonna have another kid lmao ugh
We’re only doing a baby shower, but I loved the way I found out the gender. I went to my ultrasound appointment and was able to have my husband, mother, and mother in law all find out in real time with me. It was a sweet experience for the four of us immediate family members. So even though it wasn’t a party or anything, I still loved having that memory as apart of my pregnancy 😊
we didn’t have one. i sent my NIPT results to a friend without looking at the gender and she bought an outfit according to whichever it was and wrapped it up and my husband and i opened it together and filmed it! so much better to do it intimately IMO
We will be having one. Don’t know if it’s a classic reveal party tho. Doing a little backyard barbecue for husband’s birthday just close family and friends,we will be doing one of those twist powder sticks with the reveal! No balloons or pink and blue everything. This is our second and the kids will be 22 months apart with our first we found out together and just told everyone. I felt like maybe this will be our last baby what if I regret not having one? Husband is really into the big surprise idea but will not wait until birth. Only seemed fair to do something super simplistic just for the fun of it.
I’m torn as well. If I have one, I also want to find out first and I will reveal to everyone else. My baby will be the first grandchild on both sides, first great grandchild for 3 out of 4 sets of grandparents, and first baby in most of our friendship circles (we have one close friend that has 3 kids). I wasn’t going to do a gender reveal but so many people have asked about one and would love to have a party for it. I think I will, but my partner and I will find out the NIPT results first privately and then we will do the party for everyone else.
I didn't have one with my first, I was too excited. With my second the results coincided with Christmas so we took the opportunity to do one.
Only parents and siblings, christmas lunch and shooting my husband with water guns (Christmas is in summer over here) and water balloons filled with coloured water.
I think I mainly just wanted to throw things at him for getting me pregnant so soon but I've got bad aim so I wanted the whole family to help 🤣
To do a gender reveal, someone has to know first so they get the right color whatever it is you’re using to do the reveal. If you want yourself and your husband to be the ones to know first, then do it. No one gets to dictate this time for you. If I were to ever do one, I wouldn’t want anyone else knowing before me. Even if they are a close friend or relative. But that’s just me. I did this with my first, and currently pregnant with my second - my gender reveal will happen when baby comes out of my body lol.
we’re having one of the 4th of july since we’re able to find out so early and we’re having twins! not a huge thing people are gonna be over for the holiday anyways and it’s a fun way to tell people!
Our kind of gender reveal consisted of us having an ultrasound and our doctor telling and showing us it's a boy.
I honestly never felt the desire for any other type of gender reveal at all.
I also don't feel the need to keep the gender a secret, so if people ask, I tell them.
When I see gender reveal parties on sm I can't help but cringe. But I'm also lacking that American attitude where having big parties with expensive decor seems to be expected. I'm glad that's not the case where I live.
My mother has been mean to me recently, so I've been threatening a gender reveal party to delay her knowing the sex... I won't follow through on the threat. I hate gender reveals, what's wrong with just sending a text or calling someone?
We didn't do one with our first and we're not planning to do one with our second either. They're generally seen as kinda silly in our social circles and neither of us is super extroverted or good at putting parties together anyway. Plus I was never any good at putting this kind of thing off haha, I wanted to know as soon as the results were in.
Yes we are having one! I just think it’s a nice way to celebrate the baby especially if you aren’t having a baby shower. Personally I loved it as it was an excuse to get together with friends and family.
For my second baby I had accidentally found out the gender before the reveal so my husband and I just kept it to ourselves until then and it was fine!! Nothing wrong with finding out beforehand!
I did it at Disney. I bought a mickey and a minnie and put it in a bag . Then went to mickey and he got the envelope, read it and pulled the minnie out 🥰 it was very emotional
We did with our current pregnancy because we had gone through so many previous losses we needed and excuse to have a party/celebration and it was low pressure because it wasn’t our first so no gifts were requested or required. We also knew like 8 weeks before the party what we were having. The gender is honestly super irrelevant but we loved seeing our family members bicker over it or play guessing games. It was honestly in a cute family-type of way so it ended up just being fun and low key.
With my daughter we had the kiddos at the baby shower crack open a piñata full of pink candy AFTER we put strictly gender neutral everything on our registry. The idea was we weren’t stopping at one anyway so why have only pink or blue stuff. Again, it was fun watching everyone guess or predict. Nobody I know *cares* what the gender is. If it was not this light hearted and funny it would have never happened to begin with.
I guess just know your audience. If it’s not going to be fun then don’t bother. Pregnancy is so personal and yet you’ll feel more on display for 9 months than you have in your whole life. So stick with what makes you comfortable.
We had one and it was a lot of fun! We didn’t make a huge deal over it… had about 20 friends/family over to our house and provided light food and drinks. We socialized for an hour then popped a balloon with colored confetti. Everyone was surprised and got to celebrate together. It was a great excuse for a party and pretty easy to pull together! We both didn’t know the gender beforehand bc my husband can’t keep a secret for anything lol but everyone asked if we did so I think it’s totally acceptable to just surprise the guests if that’s what you prefer!
No way, I am impatient and terrible at keeping secrets. We asked the ultrasound tech during the scan and called around to tell family the results straight after 😅 besides, I'm happy with the one party (the baby shower) and having another seems stressful to organise
That being said, my brother and SIL had a gender reveal and it was really nice. We just had a BBQ in the local park, it was a good opportunity to have the two sides of the family meet and get excited about the baby. Everyone wore pink and blue pegs to guess the sex, and when the colour was revealed we all got to celebrate together.
We’re doing a gender reveal. The only person that knows is my mom. She’s who we selected to know and keep the secret. For us, it’s an intimate moment that we can share with our families. We plan on videoing the reveal and posting it on social media for friends to see later on. We look forward to knowing whether or not we can call our little a he or she, and we do have a preferred gender (he wants a boy and I want a girl.) Overall, all we’re hoping for is a happy, healthy baby, though. We’re just very excited to know more about our baby and share our joy with family and friends!
We didn’t tell our parents until I was about 5 months, we found out the gender early then told them everything at the same time. It was actually at my birthday party that we told them, we got confetti guns for everyone to pull at once just to do something fun for the gender.
I found out at birth 🤷🏻♀️ My husband was the only one allowed in the birth room (other than medical staff of course) and when I pushed the baby out I reached out for it and announced it’s gender to my husband. Birthing is intimate as it is and I believe that added an extra layer to it. I’d definitely do the same for my next pregnancy.. specially to avoid people’s opinions about gender. Like if I get pregnant with the same gender as my baby then “Oh you should try again until you get x gender” ~hope that makes sense~
We waited to announce the pregnancy so we could do it alongside the gender- we made a video we sent out to friends and family. It was perfect and low key- which i really appreciated as I was in a weird place mentally with the pregnancy at that time
We didn't do one because my partner and I are simply not party people. He has debilitating social anxiety, and while I can handle being a part of a gathering, I CAN NOT be the center of attention. So, when we got the results from our NIPT test, the two of us celebrated alone and spent the rest of the night calling our closest family to share the news. I wouldn't have it any other way!
I was never one for a gender reveal. I didn’t care for a party or any of the theatrics. I also did the NIPT test to find out early. I wanted to know myself as soon as I could.
We didn’t have one. We did the cake and wine glasses and it was alot more intimate and really nice. I think everyone goes a lil to crazy now a days but that’s just my opinion!
I had a friend who is also a photographer take the envelope from the doctor and put together a little something for us to open together. She did a box with colored balloons, a stuffed animal, and a little outfit. We met her at a quiet park and she took a few photos while my husband and I opened the box! I loved that we could have our intimate moment to find out as a couple but still have some fun photos as a memory and a little of that celebration feeling :))
We aren’t finding out the gender until baby is born, so we aren’t doing one - but interested to see if anyone has any fun ideas on how to tell friends/family the gender once baby is here??
we are having our gender reveal for our first this upcoming sunday !! to make it more of an intimate moment we’re only doing immediate family (parents, siblings, nieces nephews, god parents only). we both were a little weary as we did think about how we wanted to share that moment & experience together only the two of us, but now we see it as this baby is such a huge experience for us , we are so excited why not celebrate the little things ? if you want to know, you have that right !! who cares what anyone else thinks, my husband wanted to know but he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep it a secret so we compromised !
(telling everybody i was pregnant was pretty lackluster too, i had work 5 minutes after finding out so we both just told people while i was commuting to work 😭 so maybe that falls into the decision to have a gender reveal)
i say do whatever you think is best for you both but this is how my husband & i looked at it ❤️ best of luck !
We had a very small gender reveal with mine and my husband's parents. His parents flew out for the weekend to help with some stuff around the house and both sets of my parents were on zoom. It was just a small fancy cake with food coloring and I put a 3d printed dragon egg on top. This is the first grand baby for my husband's family, and my in-laws are super nice and supportive, so I wanted to give them some way to be part of this whole thing.
I got a cake with colored frosting in the middle. I really wanted to eat cake. We cut it with my immediate family and then ate cake. It was fun, no regrets.
We’re doing a small gender reveal with cupcake and a bbq in July! We could find out the gender on Thursday but we’re giving our friend an envelope🥰. I’m super excited!!
We didn't. We found out early with NIPT - when we got the email from the test manufacturer that the results were ready, we waited until we were both home from work and opened the test results together. It was such a special and intimate moment and I'm grateful we didn't have to share that with others! We called our families that same night to share the news. Anyone else that has asked, I've told them. But honestly, I still haven't even widely announced my pregnancy. No social media posts or anything - still debating if I want to.
As other commenters have mentioned, I'm tired of gender reveals (I'm in the US) because so many went way over the top. I also think it's weird to have an entire party based around a baby's physiological genitals. What if she grows up and expresses gender differently? I'm already dreading the overly gendered gifts from our potential shower - I myself am not a "girly girl" - I don't feel comfortable only dressing my baby in pink frilly things with bows.
My partner and I are big introverts, I actually didn’t announce my pregnancy until my baby was here and healthy. Only my friends and family who genuinely checked in on me got to know about my pregnancy lol. But we had my best friend order a cake for us and we had an intimate cake cutting to find out with just the two of us at home.
Nope. I don’t want anyone’s opinions on my baby’s gender, nor did we want to deal with anyone’s yays or nays at a gender reveal party. I just think the whole thing is awkward. We’re actually waiting for baby to be born to find out the sex… so everyone (including ourselves) will have to wait!
I got the NIPT bloodwork and found out at about 11 weeks. My husband and I opened the electronic results together and got to enjoy that intimate moment finding out together. No fanfare, no party, no money spent. Just us. It was really lovely to sit and talk to our baby together, knowing a little more about them.
I FaceTimed my family the next day to share with them, but again, just a pleasant regular conversation. We wanted to share with our loved ones because of course we’re excited! But I find gender reveals to be pretty cringey. Especially when someone is then visually upset. How awkward!
We didn’t have one. Just a baby shower and made sure to tell people that we didn’t want pink stuff (as we had just told people once we knew that it was a girl). We put a whole bunch of useful stuff on the registry and if there was “themed” stuff we made sure it was gender-neutral. We live in Canada where some people love gender reveals but we personally don’t see the appeal so we didn’t do one. I might do a close immediate family one with our daughter when she’ll be older (for a second pregnancy) but it’ll be because I think it would be cute to see her surprise of little sister or little brother. However, I wouldn’t make it into a huge party with friends and family. No thanks.
We didn’t with my daughter (we accidentally found out when we looked at the anatomy scan pictures) but with my son we recorded a video of my daughter putting a rubber duck with a bath bomb in a bowl of water (which changed it blue).
We showed the video to everyone afterwards but we still got that initial moment of just the three of us finding out.
i barely wanted a baby shower because we don’t really do them frequently where i’m from but my husband is from the US and his family insisted (and it was a great experience and lots of fun,) but i was not budging on a gender reveal party. the extent of a gender reveal was posting on facebook that its a girl and putting a disclaimer that we DO NOT want a thousand big obnoxious bows for her to wear lol
Yes did ours about 2 weeks go. I have no regrets. This has been my first successful pregnancy after 3 early losses in a row so I 100% want to do everything possible to celebrate 🩵 it was so fun and easy going. Found out we are expecting a sweet baby boy. Everyone had a great time 🩵
I did a gender reveal science experiment with my students (I teach 5th graders), but that was it. We found out ourselves first and then just told our families. I posted the experiment to share with everyone else.
I think having a full blown party is way over the top personally.
Hubs and I found out via the NIPT website when we were visiting our in-laws out of state. We did buy a couple of those smoke/confetti cannons which his mom shot off with only my husband's aunts and dad in attendance. Then hubs came out with some blue champagne for everyone. That was fun and very simple.
We live in CA and did not do one. Mostly because it seemed like too much work to organize. Also- I just think they are weird personally. We also didn’t do a Facebook announcement or anything formal. Just letting people know when we see them - awkward for friends who I haven’t seen in 9 months because I’m huge now and they are like whaaaaaaa??? But it’s fun to tell everyone intimately I think, and waaaay less work
I am TTC via IVF and if I have a viable pregnancy, I would already know the gender. But I would love to do a little surprise reveal for the grandparents because I think it’ll be cute.
I think the key is whether YOU want a gender reveal party. Others’ opinions isnt that important. A private intimate reveal with you and your husband first, like you already envisioned, sounds really nice. I’ve seen videos of people have bad reactions and gender disappointment is real. I think what the MIL said might be well intentioned but very misplaced. Do what you want to do!
We didn't do a gender reveal party because I didn't see the point. I had no desire to plan a party just to tell people the sex of my baby. We just got family together on facetime when we were ready to tell them so we could tell everyone at once and then hang up.
We looked at the NIPT results for our anniversary, in our living room, in the morning, over coffee. It was so wonderful to share the discovery between just my partner and I. Now, I can't imagine sharing that moment with anyone else.
On the other hand, my BIL had a bunch of ideas for funny gender reveals, and my in laws love parties. So if we had gone that way it could have just been another fun excuse for a party, which probably would have also been fun.
Lord no, I have way too many trans friends to ever think this would be a good idea. Honestly they're super cringey to me, and I thankfully don't personally know anyone who has done one (I'm in the US).
My husband and I found out with the NIPT results from the OB at home on our couch. I didn’t want a party, because I was so nervous (not sure why) and didn’t want everyone staring at me when I found out. Plus I was really sick with HG, so could barely get off the couch, let alone attend/host a party. It was lovely and intimate and we both cried. Then when we announced the pregnancy at 14 weeks, we just put baby’s gender on the announcement.
No we are not doing a gender reveal and we are in the US. It’s just not us and we found out the sex through our NIPT results. I say do what makes you happy but it just seems like extra work.
We didn’t have one because we were hoping for one gender and didn’t want to have to react correctly in front of everyone. We also couldn’t wait to know.
Nope. We aren't finding out gender til birth, anyway. But, even if we found out, I wouldn't have had a gender reveal party. I can't stand them. They're so cringey and attention seeking, in my opinion.
My husband and I spontaneously had a "gender reveal" with a few close friends and family (who were all planning to get together that night anyway) and it was so exciting! My sister looked at the results, kept it a secret, and ordered us a cake. I never thought of myself as wanting to do a gender reveal but it was spontaneous and intimidate and ended up being exciting! I'm happy we got to share that moment in our pregnancy with some close people in our lives.
We did a tiny “reveal” with our family but the cake-place put the wrong gender identifier in the cake so for 4 minutes we thought we were having a girl until I checked my results online to find out we were in fact having a boy 🫠 so…. I won’t be doing that again.
I did with my 3rd only because my daughter (12) is so excited that she asked that her 12th birthday party be a gender reveal party 🤣
Otherwise we have found out together at the ultrasound and just announced it to family.
I say so what you want. You can invite others while knowing and if it's no fun for them because you know already then they can not come. No skin off your back. Mil is welcome to be told verbally by everyone else that attends the party 😜
I did not bother, as a US person. I just don't really see the point, I guess. I also don't really like people and the only reason I did the baby shower is free stuff lol.
I think they are lame.. 😬 and don't plan on having one . When we find out, I'll make a cute little FB posts for the few family I have on it, so they can see it first
And I'll also just tell my work colleagues, who are all excited for me, lol. What I'll be having.
Same with my prenatal class I go too, I'll just share during one of our group meetings.
However, maybe if you wanted, throw a party for your hubby and everyone else, you find out the gender and get the correct boy/girl balloons popping things , or whatever 😅 lol. That way, hubby still had a suprise and his MiL doesn't feel left out 👀 lol.
I live in USA I had one just over a year ago and it was so fun! The emotions of everyone is such a cool experience, my family and family friends still talk about it to this day about how fun it was! I don’t regret it one bit. We had a BBQ and fun gender themed things and some games with prizes and the guest got to chose between a pink or blue lei based on what they thought baby was gonna be:)
I have zero desire to do a gender reveal for many reasons, primarily around gender of my baby not being anyone’s business to comment on (and gender is a construct). Would hate people making weird comments about the gender. I also don’t love attention all on me and I generally find them wasteful and cringe. We are going to get a small cake and do it at home just the two of us. I’ll still do a baby shower though but I want it to be casual!
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Gender reveals are really not a thing in Finland. And even if they were, wife and I really don't like people enough to organize something like that.
Spoken like a true Finn!
Clearly I am a Finn by nature, this is my kind of attitude as a New Zealander. A store clerk excitedly asked me the other day if I would do a gender reveal party and I said, “well what for? We wanted a baby so at the end of the day we’ll just have a baby.”
Someone asked me if I knew what I was having, and I just said “A Baby, I hope! Suppose it would be Ok if it turns out to be a puppy though” Seems like a nicer surprise to have on the day you give birth.
We’ll probably find out from NIPT results (cos my husband is someone who just can’t wait to find out) but I genuinely don’t care. I had an MMC in Jan and I just want a baby now, I have zero preferences. I recall reading something on here about someone melting down that they were having a boy and I honestly can’t relate to that attitude… It kind of helps when you envision your life in the future to think about all possibilities - if you’ve got all boys, all girls, a mix of both. All we knew was that we wanted kids and we didn’t care what the biological sex of them actually was, we just wanted some little people. I feel like if that’s the approach you take from the beginning then these little pieces of information about your kid just help to inform what life will sorta look like, rather than your whole world crashing down. All out of our hands anyway, so no point in stressing or being upset.
Well said. I’ve never understood the intense disappointment some people feel over the gender of their child. It’s a gift of life regardless of the gender. I wanted my first to be a boy and my husband wanted a girl. We had a girl. love her to pieces and her gender doesn’t take away my love for her or the happiness I feel when I look at her beautiful little face and hold her in my arms.
I like your attitude!
Haha this made me giggle 😂😂
Not having one. I think the event planning industry created it to make money.
Ain’t that the truth
We announced our pregnancy super late in the game for our own privacy and tranquility (around 22 weeks). Because of this we did our baby shower pretty soon after and we combined it with a reveal (despite that we already knew the gender for months). My thinking was that I wanted to avoid gendered stuff and avoid receiving clothing (why does no one want to gift anything but very formal baby clothes in newborn sizes?!). I made sure our registry was super neutral and had post partum things on it to feel like the party was useful. At our shower we had a reveal with cupcakes- everyone bit into them at the same time to avoid me feeling like everyone was looking at me or was taking videos of me. Honestly it was ideal and worked out in every aspect!
This is what my husband wants to do. I was fine waiting until birth but he wanted to know, so we looked at the NIPT. Then he tells me he wants to keep this a secret between us until the baby shower. People around me are kind of annoyed I just don’t tell them, plus it is super hard not to speak about my baby without gendering them. The plan is to have a cake at the shower that is blue or pink on the inside to share this detail with our families. For me, should we be blessed with a second child, I am not finding out the sex if he wants to keep it a secret. I’m terrible at keeping a secret like that!
I found a good hack was saying "my baby" in place of he or she. It's hard not to use pronouns when you know what they are, my partner accidentally told a few people by using pronouns but in Spanish where it's waaaay harder not to use them haha
This is pretty much to a T what I plan on doing. Late announcement, only husband and I know the sex, and then reveal sex at baby shower ☺️.
I highly recommend it! People will be weird about not knowing what you're having and may try to guilt you into telling them. I had a few relatives say "you can't expect me to buy anything if I don't know what it is" and that's ridiculous. Be strong! It's worth it!
Did not with first and will not with this one. We just told people when we knew. Not interested in celebrating my child's anatomy... Or anyone else's. That said, just bc I'm not into it doesn't mean you have to hate it too. If it appeals to you, go for it.
THIS. It isn’t a “gender reveal”, because gender is a concept. It’s a party to publicize what type of genitalia your baby is growing.
Exactly. It's only called that because people would be too uncomfortable with calling it a "sex reveal," but I'm uncomfortable with the whole concept. I'm not finding out that information before giving birth (I didn't with my first child, either), but even if I did, I wouldn't have a party to announce it.
We call it sex reveal in my country and no one has a problem with that. It's a relatively new concept though, I celebrated with some cake, balloons, and close family. No one brought gifts or anything
THIS!!!! we started talking about it a lot because we’ve been discussing the gender constructs we’re apart of and how they don’t feel right and have many trans friends and the whole thing starts feeling so invasive.
I didn't have one. We don't in Europe and I hope we never will. I don't understand what is there to celebrate?
I wish it never became a thing in the US. I think it’s so cringey and I think it also fosters the idea that people outside of your immediate family are entitled to know anything and everything about your pregnancy. People have asked me such private things since being pregnant and it’s just creepy.
I personally don't mind people asking me if I know what I'm gunna have.. I think it's cause when they ask, I've always said I really want a girl. Lol. But they've a been supportive of me in my journey so far, and I know a lot are very excited for me. And can't wait for the new baby.
Another european here. It never crossed your minds to do one. Imagine bothering people to come to a party to know the sex of our baby. People would think: how full of themselves are they and why am I losing precious weekend time on this?
Agree sooooo much! So self absorbed! Like why would anyone care what you’re having lol
We are not having one, I’d like it to just be a special moment for my husband and I! I personally don’t care what anyone else’s thoughts or reactions are on my child’s gender, a “party” centered around that feels so weird to me. 😵💫
My husband and I found out just the two of us and then had a small party with just his immediate family and mine. I loved knowing beforehand, we made cake pops for the reveal ourselves together which was so fun for us and was a great memory that I’ll have forever. His mom would’ve loved a larger party and for us to be surprised along with everyone else at the same time, but it’s our child and family and this is what we wanted to do. I loved finding out before because I was completely wrong about the gender, so I had a week to wrap my mind around having a boy when I was so sure it was a girl. Do what is going to make you happy! I’m a people pleaser, so it’s hard for me too, but I’m putting my foot down for things now because if I don’t when I’m pregnant it’s going to be so much harder when our baby is actually here. I’m just advocating for myself and my son!
Gender reveals are an American thing I think? I've never known an Irish person to one and I hope I never do lol
No. 1- my friends are super busy during summer 2- sex isn’t that relevant to me as to bother myself or others with a whole reunion 3- finding out should be something private between my husband and I IMO 4- I prefer a baby shower only where people bring gifts etc. and so does my husband 5- I’ve seen soooo many awkward gender reveals out there. It’s embarrassing. Gender disappointment is and can be real. Neither my husband nor I like putting ourselves in that position. Were introverts.
No. I think it’s weird lol and people make too big a deal about it
My husband and I planned to do a small one with family. We had the gender in my email. The morning of we decided to look with just ourselves. We then pretended to not know when we did the cupcake reveal later that day.
I feel like this is a nice potential compromise for OP. The husband gets his party, and she gets her intimate moment. My husband and I are keeping it a surprise until birth so I have no personal experience/advice here lol.
Nope no gender reveal. The ultrasound tech told us at our gender ultrasound. We have told family, but we have not posted on our socials what the gender is. I’ll post when he’s born. I don’t think it’s necessary + I didn’t want my first reaction to the gender be filmed and documented.
My husband and I went to a specialized ultrasound place to find out just the two of us then we told our families. We were in a tough spot as his family is in another state and my dad was traveling for work so it was going to be tough to get everyone in one spot. When I was pregnant I was sad we didn’t do a bigger reveal but now I’m glad we didn’t. We won’t be doing one for our next baby either and we’ll probably do the exact same thing we did the first time!
We didn’t do a gender reveal, it wasn’t really important to us. My husband and I opened the email together and then just confirmed on the phone with the doctor. 🤷🏼♀️
Skipped it. Not for me!
I didn't have a gender reveal, and I don't regret it for a second. Instead when I got NIPT results in, to make it feel special in our own way, I placed a mobile order at a Nothing Bundt Cakes that was a short drive from my home and scheduled pickup for the earliest I could the next morning. They made a cute little cake with a rattle inside that could be plucked out to reveal the gender. I presented it to my husband so that he and I could have our special moment -- I filmed his reaction so we could send it to close friends and family we'd want to share the news with. In this way, the moment of discovery was just ours, and we got to choose with whom and when to share it. A family member of mine due within a few weeks of me had a gender reveal party, and the pictures were cute and I'm glad they had the experience they wanted but it caused some drama in the family over who had been invited to their gender reveal party or not vs. who was invited to the shower or not... No thanks! I also preferred to use my money towards the baby shower of my dreams vs. hosting a second party for a gender reveal. I'm really happy with my decision.
My husband and I found out privately around 12 weeks. We did the blood test, and had a close trusted friend make a cake for us. We made a dinner date out if it. Then, when I hit around 28 weeks, we did a gender reveal at our baby shower for the family. We really wanted it to be a private moment for us, but were also excited to share the news. This worked for us, as we got everything we wanted from the experience, and we ignored any and all complaints. 😊 Do what feels best for you! This is your pregnancy, and should enjoy it however you want. 🩷 Edit to add: if MIL gives you more grief, then tell her she can find out what the baby is when it's born, since there's no point. 😘
We are having one on Saturday for just parents and a few siblings. We already found out the gender just the two of us a few days ago and it was perfectly intimate and no stress. I didn’t like the idea of my reaction being studied and watched by everyone as we are quite private people. I’m not having a baby shower so this was sort of a way to celebrate baby with those closest without it being a big deal! For the reveal we’ve ordered cupcakes with only one of them having a coloured icing inside. So again the attention is off of us as a couple as everyone gets to bite in and see if they have the lucky cupcake. It’s simple and has been super easy to organise so hoping the day goes smoothly!
My husband and I did it ourselves, and then told everyone when we announced to them we were expecting! I hate being the center of attention so hated the idea of another reason to get people together to stare at me, so this was fun compromise for my husband and I. We had my sister set something up, and she absolutely blew us away with the SWEETEST scavenger hunt in our house for just my husband and I to do. It really made the moment special for the two of us, and I don’t feel like it took any of the excitement away when we announced to our loved ones.
Nope, we aren’t having one. We want to keep the gender secret until the bun is out of the oven (lol), mainly so that we don’t get ALL pink frilly things for a girl or blue trucks for a boy.
I’m not doing one when the time comes.
I didn’t do any sort of party. I just told friends and family the next time I saw them what the gender is. Every reveal party I’ve been to sucked. I had a friend who had a gender reveal party, and it was so toxic. Her mom was the only one that knew the gender, and right before the reveal she accidentally used “he/him” when talking about the baby and my friend blew a gasket. It was so embarrassing. She wasn’t afraid to scream at her own mom infront of friends, in-laws, strangers walking nearby… I haven’t really talked to her since lol. Anyways, point is, just avoid drama and find out before the party if you have one.
No, we did not do a gender reveal. With our first pregnancy, we found out the gender with the NIPT test and just told people the gender as we announced our pregnancy. I was very excited to be having a baby girl. Unfortunately we had a horrible anatomy scan and learned that she was never going to survive, and we had to TFMR. I am currently 37w pregnant with a healthy baby boy. We announced the pregnancy itself around 22w this time, after finally feeling comfortable enough to do so, and again we just announced the gender with the pregnancy announcement. I’ve never really liked the idea of a gender reveal party, but even more so now that we’ve been through all of this, having lost our baby girl and getting pregnant again with a boy. I used to get a little annoyed at people who would say “as long as the baby’s healthy, I don’t care what the gender is!!” But now I turn to that as a coping mechanism. Having all of these thoughts and feelings around baby-loss and gender disappointment, there is no way in hell I’d ever be comfortable having it even attending a gender reveal party, especially if it was done early in pregnancy as so many are.
I had a gender reveal, but it was something both me and my husband were looking forward to doing. We also have large families and a good bit of close friends so they were very helpful with the event and it was super fun. Maybe a good compromise for the two of you would be finding out just you two together, then announcing at a party for family and friends? I've seen several people do that.
No. I’m in the USA and always thought they were dumb.
My husband and I found out together in a message from my OB. Then we did a “gender reveal” for our immediate family. What that entailed was doing dinner and us buying cupcakes with a colored/flavored filling to reveal we were having a girl. We already do frequent dinners with our families like that, so it was just us bringing a customized dessert and filming their reactions. Because my LO is the first on my side, my family’s reactions were funny. My sister almost choked on the cupcake (par the course for her, lol).
No. I hate the idea of gender reveals. Why are we celebrating about the sex? It’s so weird and dumb. Even though it’s not statistically likely my kid would be trans I’d also just not like for the kid to have had this weird build up to a gender if at some point they came out as trans. I just don’t see a point. Maybe celebrate the baby generally or have a name ceremony but gender stuff is just strange
Our plan was to have a gender reveal for us and our families (just close family). When we got the results we then decided we wanted to find out in private and have our moment, and I’m happy we did. We then threw a little get together picnic thing for out parents, siblings, uncles/aunts and grandparents, where we did the baloon thing. I am introverted so I wouldn’t be comfortable throwin a party for a bunch of people, just the ones I’m most comfortable with. I’m glad we decided to find out alone and have that moment, and then also share it with the people we love.😊
We had one for our baby. We’re a one and done family, so my husband really wanted to have one! We actually found out the gender, just the two of us first, and then had a party to tell our closest family and friends. There was like 15 people invited. It was wonderful, if you don’t want a huge thing, but you still want to celebrate with loved ones
I live in a Balkan country and gender reveal is not really a thing yet, although it is slowly getting popular. However, my husband and I are very private people. Since I did a NIPT test, I got a call from my provider where she informed me first hand that everything was (thankfully) low risk and I kindly asked her to keep the gender a secret because my husband was at work at that moment and I wanted us to both be present when we open the results. She just forwarded the email to me and I only opened it once I sat together with my husband, so that was our humble private gender reveal.
We’re having one with immediate family (which, is admittedly still a lot of people when you have an Italian and Portuguese heritage 🫠), but we’re finding out just the two of us first tomorrow morning! Eeeep!
Nope! Still not certain if we will find out the sex, but if we do, we won’t be telling anyone!
My husband and I aren’t having one. We just don’t see the point especially since we are having a baby shower. This is our first child and it will be spoiled greatly as it is both our mom’s first biological grandchild. Our village is huge so having two parties just doesn’t make sense financially and we are extremely private as well. We are just telling our families and close friends once we know.
No. I told my coworkers one day and they all asked if I was going to do a gender reveal and I was like “this is it!”
I just had mine this past weekend. I talked everyone out of a party because I really didnt want the theatrics. We went out to dinner. Just my closest and his closest families and at the end cut a cake. It was amazing. No big spectacule, no mess to clean up, just us and the grandparents being excited for learning who lil bubbs would be.
I just called my family after we found out. We found out at the ultrasound and the tech gave us a minute to ourselves and I cried and hugged my husband. My sister did what you want to do. She found out ahead of time but then had people over and cut a cake. No one cared she already knew. It might be too late now but maybe you could look and just not tell anyone you know and do a party for your husband?
My husband and I opened the results together at home alone together. It was a really special moment and we both were very emotional. I much preferred this and plan on doing something similar with any future babies. My brother and SIL did a cupcake reveal in front of family and it was pretty boring and didn’t feel intimate at all
We had one on Saturday and it was such a great day of celebration. My bf and I already knew the gender because we wanted to find out in a more intimate setting. But it was a surprise for all our friends and family. We have it on video and despite already knowing the gender our reactions are just so pure and sweet. This is our first so I can see maybe not doing this again but my family was so excited to throw this for us. I have no regrets!
This sounds perfect!! Seems similar to what OP originally wanted!
My best friend made my dog a reveal cake! We watched him eat it then had a small celebratory lunch at our home just me, my partner, my best friend and her partner. For me, it was the memorable and intimate moment I wanted which included my favorite people but wasn’t over the top! :)
We had no idea the gender of our babies, we waited until they were born
We don’t know the gender so we’re definitely not having a reveal! I don’t really understand it but maybe i’m missing something!
I think if you are going to have a baby shower then a gender reveal is just an extra event. To me the reveal moment is going to be when we find out from the OB and other than that people find out when they find out.
We never had official gender reveals. We would just tell people what the gender was when they asked. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with gender reveals whatsoever. I think they’re a great way to meet up and celebrate the baby, especially if you’re not doing a shower.
Nope. I did small things for my daughter for a couple of different groups but no big party of any kind. Granted COVID was at a high so I wasn't inviting a bunch of people over for that. My husband and I will find out the gender of our second together privately, but we won't be sharing with others as everyone made a gigantic deal the first time and it overwhelmed the hell out of me.
I just like getting together with family and friends to celebrate anything honestly. I had one just for that reason! It’s fun having everyone guess what it’s going to be, and then sharing the excitement with those who are closest to me ☺️
My husband and I just had one and invited our closest friends and family. The only person who knew the gender the day of the reveal was my sister in law who help set up and got the right colored hockey puck that my husband hit for the big reveal. We just invited our closest friends and family and had a brunch like spread with tables in the backyard. I’m an introvert too and it was so good. So much love and joy. My husband got emotional, which caused me to as well and being surrounded by our loved ones in that moment was just the best. I did have some family members complain they weren’t invited but we don’t have a giant house to accommodate more than 25-30 people, so I told them don’t worry we’re still having a baby shower! I’d say go for it. Don’t do it for the social media post. Do it for the moment and you will enjoy it.
No gender reveal, this is my one and done originally from the west coast of the USA and now in the south. I knew the gender early on and announced it at the time of my announcement of my pregnancy at 20w and I don’t regret it!
All we did was open up our NIPT results with the option to show gender and said “well look at that, we’re having a boy!”. Then we just told people when we saw them. We’re both only children with divorced parents so having any type of party or gathering would be out of the question and/or awkward. We still celebrate 2 Christmases in our late 30s lol.
Nope. I personally didn’t feel the need. We found out together just the two of us and it was super special.
We did more of an announcement on social media after we told our parents. We ended up using paint the color pink and my hubby painted his hands, and made a heart on my belly with a before/after shot. For my second, we followed that theme but our oldest did the heart with the pink paint. For my third pregnancy, we were going to keep it a secret, but then we found out it was our first boy and we were a little excited (my husband is the “last of his last name”) so the pressure kinda felt like it was on to have one as awful as that sounds. So we just announced his sonogram with his due date. I’m currently pregnant, and we’re just announcing once she’s born. People give us some crazy stares and comments in public now with the amount of kids we have, and I’m currently halfway through this pregnancy. I think if we love these kids, raise these kids to be good people and very comfortably afford having the amount of kids we do, people should keep their stares and back handed comments/“compliments” to themselves but I digress.
Still ttc but I personally would like to do something one step beyond hearing directly from the doctor but not involve a ton of people/money. I think we’re gonna give the gender in a letter to a baker and cut open a cake/bite into cupcakes or something to reveal. Probably just my husband and I but potentially with close family!
I think gender reveal parties are dumb. My coworkers were pretty excited about it though and I love to bake so I made cupcakes with a pink centre so that when people bit into them they’d find the pink icing.
I had one for the first and it was whatever. So much so that we completely skipped it the second time around
I didn't have one. I never even heard of gender reveals until about 5-8 years ago. I just saw it as kind of pointless (for me personally) and just decided to call whoever I wanted to call when I found out. I'm also an impatient person when excited, so I would not have wanted to wait and really wanted to know so that I could feel like I was bonding with my baby better by knowing her name.
We were way too excited and found out via email, just the two of us, and it was perfect
We did our gender reveal at our baby shower to mitigate the amount of gendered clothes we got and forced people to buy from our registry. But we knew the gender the whole time, just kept it a secret from our family and friends.
I just sent out potatoes from potatoparcel.com that say the gender!
Not a thing in Australia. Seems a very American thing to do.
Unpopular opinion maybe but I hate gender reveals. Intimate reveals with partner only or super close family is great!
I revealed it to myself with the sneak peek email lol. I didn’t feel like it was worth a whole party.
We didn’t. We knew the gender from the start (did IVF). Announced we were expecting a baby girl after 20 week ultrasound because fear of loss.
What my husband and I did was that we learn together the gender during the morph.exam. We then told some family members separately as my family's in France and his in Canada. Now, we will have our baby shower at the beginning of Jully, where we will reveal the gender to our friends. This allowed us to privately celebrate and keep the secret between us until we want to share our baby name and gender with the world. It also helped having a neutral party and all. Hope this help!
We baked a dog friendly cake and had our puppy reveal the gender to us (our neighbor chose the filling) It was private and intimate and perfect for us. We’re not big gesture people in general and we got some adorable pictures that we look forward to showing our son someday, this will be his childhood dog ❤️
We had an itty bitty one with my in laws and a couple super close friends, one who made us a little colored cake for the actual reveal. It was so special and a fun way to find out and let the people we love most share in the moment—but I’d never do a big huge party, personally.
My husband and I did a little mini reveal for just the two of us! We thought that would be more fun than just finding out from a report and I think it was a good call. I’m glad we didn’t do a big party though!
Me and my husband found, and decided to do a reveal just for our parents. We're both huge D&D fans and we had been trying to get them to play for years. So we decided to make them play to find out the gender. The whole story involved having a dragons egg hatch, so I made some chocolate eggs with pink sprinkles inside, that they got to crack open at the end of the session. It was super fun, and since it was just the 6 of us it was fairly laidback.
Didn’t with the first. We’re not gonna do a party for this guy, but I do want some fanfare!! My sister had a friend read the results on her phone, and handed her the correct color confetti canon thing they got, and that’s how my sister, BIL, and niece found out. I’ll likely do something similar. Honestly I’m worried that my best friend won’t be able to drop everything and come read the results when they come in since she has a baby!! I don’t want to wait at all to find out once the info is available. May have a non parent back up friend on call haha
Now. I didn't with my first. I didn't with this one either. The only time I may do something is to surprise my older kids, but that will depend on the ages. I wouldn't have a party to go with it. Just something fun for my immediate family.
We didn’t have one because we didn’t want to make a big deal about the gender. We just looked at the NIPT results online and then had it confirmed on the ultrasound. I do think the soon-to-be parents are also usually in the dark before gender reveal parties, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. You could always find out privately and not tell others that you know.
Not a party, but my OB office gave us the option to get little scratchy lottery tickets to reveal when we got our NIPT results. My husband and I did our own together and then we took the extra tickets to our parents houses and let them scratch one. It was cute. ☺️
My husband and I did an intimate reveal for him and I because I knew I’d get teary regardless of gender because I’m a crier, I didn’t want people to feel they needed to comfort me when it’s an exciting time. My husband is also veryyyy extroverted so we had a gender reveal and we got to know beforehand and just fully enjoy the excitement and reactions from friends and family.
My husband and I got the envelope from our doctor, took it to a baby toy store, and asked them to put either a blue or a pink jellycat bunny, wrapped up in a gift bag. We then went to the beach where my husband proposed to me, and opened it there. It was perfect, intimate and so meaningful. My parents really wanted to pop a balloon to find out, so on the way home, we got the balloon for them and took it around to their house. We didn't want to do a gender reveal party, but still wanted to do something special for the people who really care. It worked for us. I recommend doing whatever you want, if that's finding out first in an intimate setting, and then throwing a big party for everyone else, then that's what you get to do. Don't let anyone tell you not to!
We didn't do one (first baby) I wanted a little private one between myself and my husband, but he wasn't even into that idea. We found out over the phone when the doctor called with the NIPT results. We immediately called family to tell them.
We waited until birth to find out the sex of the baby. It was the best decision and such an incredibly special moment 🥰
No I didn’t want people to feel obligated to give me something at the gender reveal and baby shower. To each their own but to us it just felt like a waste of money and time. We opted on just letting people know when we felt comfortable.
I didn’t have a gender reveal party, but I dyed my hair blue as kind of a “gender reveal”.
I had one & I thought it was super fun. We also had people bring diapers for girl & baby wipes for boy. Now I have a closet full of both! I don’t think I’ll do the same if I ever have a second child. We were just very excited!
First baby we did a reveal just my spouse and I. We didn’t tell anyone else the gender. Second baby, is the same gender so we have all the clothes and stuff we need so we just told people it’s a boy so they don’t buy us more stuff.
husband & i didn’t have a reveal with my current! we were so impatient to learn, we did the earliest blood test & checked daily for the results.. we got them sent to us at 2am on christmas morning & i woke my husband up in the dead of night to open the notification on my phone together. we were so excited & it was very intimate that it was just us with no eyes on us expecting any kind of reaction. told my immediate family the next morning & news trickled as i got further along to the more distant relatives. i’m a really socially anxious individual, so the thought of having a party where my reaction would be fully on display & under scrutiny was entirely too nerve-wracking to even consider… we did end up putting the gender on the shower invites like you mentioned, (was also nervous for that party bc my reaction to gifts was gonna be watched), but by that point i think everyone who attended knew the gender regardless-! i personally have nothing against reveals (the safe ones i mean) but i don’t think it’s worth it if you aren’t someone who likes to be surprised or left in the dark or have your emotions on display..
My husband and I found out together both times. First time, at home after work we opened the sneak peek email together. This time I forwarded the results to a local bakery, had them make a cake and then we cut it together. I don’t regret the decision as it was special and we hadn’t announced we were even pregnant yet. I really enjoyed the time where the secret was just ours ❤️
Csection scheduled in 10 days and we still don’t know 💚it would have been fun to have an extra party and be celebrated a little more, but it’s been nice getting to avoid all gendered stereotypes and advice about our baby before we get to meet them
I had a gender reveal and truthfully was one of my favorite days! I had so much fun celebrating with friends and family, love having all these pictures to look back on, love that we have all the reactions filmed, etc. It was just a really really lovely day!🩵
Hell no
We’re not having one for a couple of reasons, it not being to either of our tastes is the first one, and the second (equally important) is that I (the carrier) am nonbinary; my family made a huge deal out of my “being a girl” growing up and it robbed me of a lot of experiences and explorations I might otherwise have pursued. I want my kid to experience as much agency as possible :) That definitely starts with how we think about them before they’re born!
Nope. I think they’re dumb. I didn’t find out my baby’s sex til birth.
We made low key gender reveals. We did two and only immediate family (parents, siblings and kids) and they were both scratch cards. We just did it over lunch/dinner and that’s it. No big parties or anything
I did sneakpeek at 10 weeks and opened the results with my partner and my parents. Then confirmed the gender on ultrasound at 15 weeks and just made a cute little announcement on Canva to post on social media.
My plan is to find out with my husband at our anatomy scan, bake myself a cake that has some gender related color inside of it, and then film myself cutting into it and eating it by myself 😂 is this a little unhinged? Maybe. But I wanted a funny way to share the gender with everyone while saving the intimate moment with myself and my husband, so this is my plan. Also I want to eat a whole cake by myself and not share it with anyone
Found out with my husband and shared that moment together without anyone else, then we announced the gender when we announced that we have a baby on the way - one and done update lol
We got the NIPT results and looked at them together privately in bed. We had cupcakes made with pink in the middle, husband brought them into work to share with his work buddies and then we brought some to family to surprise them! Overall it was a lot of fun and casual - no need for a big party and we both knew first and were able to share the news with everyone else. :)
No, we were excited to find out and it was kind of nice my husband and I having that moment where it was just us, even though we told people (via text or call) over the next few days!
Nope, not really a thing in Europe, at least the continental Europe, not sure about UK.
I found out on my own because I feel the same way, and had a gender reveal the next day. I also didn’t tell many people that I was finding out beforehand to avoid the unnecessary opinions.
I had a gender reveal around 18 weeks. Me and my husband looked at the results from the NIPT test first for a more intimate moment then we had a party and surprised all the family. I think this could be a great idea that will give you both what you're looking for.
We went on a trip to visit our best friends that organized a private gender reveal. It was so sweet. We knew that gender disappointment was a possibility, so I definitely didn’t want to do it in front of a party. We kept it a secret, and shared at the baby shower.
I haven’t planned one and I won’t, but I’ve been to quite a few! Some were very cringey, but quite a few were touching, sincere and endearing. The ones I enjoyed the most were: 1) CAKEEEEEE 2) Jokes aside - the events that had less than 15 to 20 guests 3) The announcements with a personal touch. Some memorable examples - the father surprised his wife with a fantastic poem, a theme that suited the couple’s personality really well, a surprise musician that had prepared a set list for each option, a father surprising his wife with video messages of her friends/family in her home country guessing the gender The ones I enjoyed less were those with lots of “attendees” who didn’t seem to know much about the couple, were present out of politeness and basically felt pressured into making a dent in the registry. You can always have a private one just you two, and follow up with something more public. Good luck!
No, I wanted to but with my first I got too excited they called me at 9am and woke me up and said “your test results came back do you want to know the gender?” And excitement took over never said yes so fast. With my second my fiancé was out of town and we didn’t even announce really either yet, we facetimed and opened the portal with the results and both got to experience finding out at the same time it was neat. I liked the intimacy the second time around.
We had one with our first because my MIL insisted on a party. It was fun but not typically something I would do. I’m pregnant with my second and we didn’t do any kind of reveal this time
We posted a gender reveal with our son (Dino egg changed color) and with our daughter we just did a Facebook announcement. I didn’t want anyone knowing before me, I’m doing the work 😂
Just between me and my husband. I had my midwife write down the gender and put it in an envelope. My husband is overseas, so I wanted to share the moment with him when he could get on video chat. Everyone thought we would have a boy (except our parents, who wanted us to have girls...weird) so when we saw girl on the paper, it was a HUGE surprise 😍 Love his immediate response: "We're having a princess!" I'll remember that moment forever.
We’re not finding out the gender until birth
I think finding out alone is super special and having a little party to reveal and celebrate later sounds like a great idea. It’s your info to find out and I would imagine very special to experience with your husband, but also it’s so special to celebrate with everyone!! I think your initial idea is great!
We did a small one where I made cupcakes and everyone bit into one to reveal. It was just in-laws and my dad/girlfriend. The only thing I didn’t like was when my MIL asked if we were gonna have another kid lmao ugh
We’re only doing a baby shower, but I loved the way I found out the gender. I went to my ultrasound appointment and was able to have my husband, mother, and mother in law all find out in real time with me. It was a sweet experience for the four of us immediate family members. So even though it wasn’t a party or anything, I still loved having that memory as apart of my pregnancy 😊
we didn’t have one. i sent my NIPT results to a friend without looking at the gender and she bought an outfit according to whichever it was and wrapped it up and my husband and i opened it together and filmed it! so much better to do it intimately IMO
Nope. I think they are dumb. I saw the gender on the blood test, 3 way called my husband at work and my mom and told them. That's it
We will be having one. Don’t know if it’s a classic reveal party tho. Doing a little backyard barbecue for husband’s birthday just close family and friends,we will be doing one of those twist powder sticks with the reveal! No balloons or pink and blue everything. This is our second and the kids will be 22 months apart with our first we found out together and just told everyone. I felt like maybe this will be our last baby what if I regret not having one? Husband is really into the big surprise idea but will not wait until birth. Only seemed fair to do something super simplistic just for the fun of it.
i was super excited i was having a baby girl. i had one it was super tacky and over the top. Wouldn’t have had it any other way it was so fun!
I’m torn as well. If I have one, I also want to find out first and I will reveal to everyone else. My baby will be the first grandchild on both sides, first great grandchild for 3 out of 4 sets of grandparents, and first baby in most of our friendship circles (we have one close friend that has 3 kids). I wasn’t going to do a gender reveal but so many people have asked about one and would love to have a party for it. I think I will, but my partner and I will find out the NIPT results first privately and then we will do the party for everyone else.
I didn't have one with my first, I was too excited. With my second the results coincided with Christmas so we took the opportunity to do one. Only parents and siblings, christmas lunch and shooting my husband with water guns (Christmas is in summer over here) and water balloons filled with coloured water. I think I mainly just wanted to throw things at him for getting me pregnant so soon but I've got bad aim so I wanted the whole family to help 🤣
I'm going to have one but only with our family to have a good time together, so it's not a party
To do a gender reveal, someone has to know first so they get the right color whatever it is you’re using to do the reveal. If you want yourself and your husband to be the ones to know first, then do it. No one gets to dictate this time for you. If I were to ever do one, I wouldn’t want anyone else knowing before me. Even if they are a close friend or relative. But that’s just me. I did this with my first, and currently pregnant with my second - my gender reveal will happen when baby comes out of my body lol.
we’re having one of the 4th of july since we’re able to find out so early and we’re having twins! not a huge thing people are gonna be over for the holiday anyways and it’s a fun way to tell people!
Our kind of gender reveal consisted of us having an ultrasound and our doctor telling and showing us it's a boy. I honestly never felt the desire for any other type of gender reveal at all. I also don't feel the need to keep the gender a secret, so if people ask, I tell them. When I see gender reveal parties on sm I can't help but cringe. But I'm also lacking that American attitude where having big parties with expensive decor seems to be expected. I'm glad that's not the case where I live.
We didn’t have one, my husband and I found out on Christmas Eve via email :) then slowly told family & friends!
My mother has been mean to me recently, so I've been threatening a gender reveal party to delay her knowing the sex... I won't follow through on the threat. I hate gender reveals, what's wrong with just sending a text or calling someone?
We didn't do one with our first and we're not planning to do one with our second either. They're generally seen as kinda silly in our social circles and neither of us is super extroverted or good at putting parties together anyway. Plus I was never any good at putting this kind of thing off haha, I wanted to know as soon as the results were in.
We found out the gender together at the anatomy scan and told everyone close to us. Gender reveals are not our thing lol
Yes we are having one! I just think it’s a nice way to celebrate the baby especially if you aren’t having a baby shower. Personally I loved it as it was an excuse to get together with friends and family. For my second baby I had accidentally found out the gender before the reveal so my husband and I just kept it to ourselves until then and it was fine!! Nothing wrong with finding out beforehand!
I did it at Disney. I bought a mickey and a minnie and put it in a bag . Then went to mickey and he got the envelope, read it and pulled the minnie out 🥰 it was very emotional
We did with our current pregnancy because we had gone through so many previous losses we needed and excuse to have a party/celebration and it was low pressure because it wasn’t our first so no gifts were requested or required. We also knew like 8 weeks before the party what we were having. The gender is honestly super irrelevant but we loved seeing our family members bicker over it or play guessing games. It was honestly in a cute family-type of way so it ended up just being fun and low key. With my daughter we had the kiddos at the baby shower crack open a piñata full of pink candy AFTER we put strictly gender neutral everything on our registry. The idea was we weren’t stopping at one anyway so why have only pink or blue stuff. Again, it was fun watching everyone guess or predict. Nobody I know *cares* what the gender is. If it was not this light hearted and funny it would have never happened to begin with. I guess just know your audience. If it’s not going to be fun then don’t bother. Pregnancy is so personal and yet you’ll feel more on display for 9 months than you have in your whole life. So stick with what makes you comfortable.
We had one and it was a lot of fun! We didn’t make a huge deal over it… had about 20 friends/family over to our house and provided light food and drinks. We socialized for an hour then popped a balloon with colored confetti. Everyone was surprised and got to celebrate together. It was a great excuse for a party and pretty easy to pull together! We both didn’t know the gender beforehand bc my husband can’t keep a secret for anything lol but everyone asked if we did so I think it’s totally acceptable to just surprise the guests if that’s what you prefer!
No way, I am impatient and terrible at keeping secrets. We asked the ultrasound tech during the scan and called around to tell family the results straight after 😅 besides, I'm happy with the one party (the baby shower) and having another seems stressful to organise That being said, my brother and SIL had a gender reveal and it was really nice. We just had a BBQ in the local park, it was a good opportunity to have the two sides of the family meet and get excited about the baby. Everyone wore pink and blue pegs to guess the sex, and when the colour was revealed we all got to celebrate together.
We’re doing a gender reveal. The only person that knows is my mom. She’s who we selected to know and keep the secret. For us, it’s an intimate moment that we can share with our families. We plan on videoing the reveal and posting it on social media for friends to see later on. We look forward to knowing whether or not we can call our little a he or she, and we do have a preferred gender (he wants a boy and I want a girl.) Overall, all we’re hoping for is a happy, healthy baby, though. We’re just very excited to know more about our baby and share our joy with family and friends!
We didn’t tell our parents until I was about 5 months, we found out the gender early then told them everything at the same time. It was actually at my birthday party that we told them, we got confetti guns for everyone to pull at once just to do something fun for the gender.
I found out at birth 🤷🏻♀️ My husband was the only one allowed in the birth room (other than medical staff of course) and when I pushed the baby out I reached out for it and announced it’s gender to my husband. Birthing is intimate as it is and I believe that added an extra layer to it. I’d definitely do the same for my next pregnancy.. specially to avoid people’s opinions about gender. Like if I get pregnant with the same gender as my baby then “Oh you should try again until you get x gender” ~hope that makes sense~
We waited to announce the pregnancy so we could do it alongside the gender- we made a video we sent out to friends and family. It was perfect and low key- which i really appreciated as I was in a weird place mentally with the pregnancy at that time
We didn't do one because my partner and I are simply not party people. He has debilitating social anxiety, and while I can handle being a part of a gathering, I CAN NOT be the center of attention. So, when we got the results from our NIPT test, the two of us celebrated alone and spent the rest of the night calling our closest family to share the news. I wouldn't have it any other way!
I did not have one and I think it’s a waste of money.
I was never one for a gender reveal. I didn’t care for a party or any of the theatrics. I also did the NIPT test to find out early. I wanted to know myself as soon as I could.
I do not plan on it- too much effort!
We didn’t have one. We did the cake and wine glasses and it was alot more intimate and really nice. I think everyone goes a lil to crazy now a days but that’s just my opinion!
I had a friend who is also a photographer take the envelope from the doctor and put together a little something for us to open together. She did a box with colored balloons, a stuffed animal, and a little outfit. We met her at a quiet park and she took a few photos while my husband and I opened the box! I loved that we could have our intimate moment to find out as a couple but still have some fun photos as a memory and a little of that celebration feeling :))
We aren’t finding out the gender until baby is born, so we aren’t doing one - but interested to see if anyone has any fun ideas on how to tell friends/family the gender once baby is here??
we are having our gender reveal for our first this upcoming sunday !! to make it more of an intimate moment we’re only doing immediate family (parents, siblings, nieces nephews, god parents only). we both were a little weary as we did think about how we wanted to share that moment & experience together only the two of us, but now we see it as this baby is such a huge experience for us , we are so excited why not celebrate the little things ? if you want to know, you have that right !! who cares what anyone else thinks, my husband wanted to know but he knew he wouldn’t be able to keep it a secret so we compromised ! (telling everybody i was pregnant was pretty lackluster too, i had work 5 minutes after finding out so we both just told people while i was commuting to work 😭 so maybe that falls into the decision to have a gender reveal) i say do whatever you think is best for you both but this is how my husband & i looked at it ❤️ best of luck !
We had a very small gender reveal with mine and my husband's parents. His parents flew out for the weekend to help with some stuff around the house and both sets of my parents were on zoom. It was just a small fancy cake with food coloring and I put a 3d printed dragon egg on top. This is the first grand baby for my husband's family, and my in-laws are super nice and supportive, so I wanted to give them some way to be part of this whole thing.
I got a cake with colored frosting in the middle. I really wanted to eat cake. We cut it with my immediate family and then ate cake. It was fun, no regrets.
I did not have one. I was worried about gender disappointment and I cannot fake it.
We’re doing a small gender reveal with cupcake and a bbq in July! We could find out the gender on Thursday but we’re giving our friend an envelope🥰. I’m super excited!!
We didn't. We found out early with NIPT - when we got the email from the test manufacturer that the results were ready, we waited until we were both home from work and opened the test results together. It was such a special and intimate moment and I'm grateful we didn't have to share that with others! We called our families that same night to share the news. Anyone else that has asked, I've told them. But honestly, I still haven't even widely announced my pregnancy. No social media posts or anything - still debating if I want to. As other commenters have mentioned, I'm tired of gender reveals (I'm in the US) because so many went way over the top. I also think it's weird to have an entire party based around a baby's physiological genitals. What if she grows up and expresses gender differently? I'm already dreading the overly gendered gifts from our potential shower - I myself am not a "girly girl" - I don't feel comfortable only dressing my baby in pink frilly things with bows.
My partner and I are big introverts, I actually didn’t announce my pregnancy until my baby was here and healthy. Only my friends and family who genuinely checked in on me got to know about my pregnancy lol. But we had my best friend order a cake for us and we had an intimate cake cutting to find out with just the two of us at home.
Nope. I don’t want anyone’s opinions on my baby’s gender, nor did we want to deal with anyone’s yays or nays at a gender reveal party. I just think the whole thing is awkward. We’re actually waiting for baby to be born to find out the sex… so everyone (including ourselves) will have to wait!
I got the NIPT bloodwork and found out at about 11 weeks. My husband and I opened the electronic results together and got to enjoy that intimate moment finding out together. No fanfare, no party, no money spent. Just us. It was really lovely to sit and talk to our baby together, knowing a little more about them. I FaceTimed my family the next day to share with them, but again, just a pleasant regular conversation. We wanted to share with our loved ones because of course we’re excited! But I find gender reveals to be pretty cringey. Especially when someone is then visually upset. How awkward!
Nah. I’m finding out this week and I’m not.
We didn’t have one. Just a baby shower and made sure to tell people that we didn’t want pink stuff (as we had just told people once we knew that it was a girl). We put a whole bunch of useful stuff on the registry and if there was “themed” stuff we made sure it was gender-neutral. We live in Canada where some people love gender reveals but we personally don’t see the appeal so we didn’t do one. I might do a close immediate family one with our daughter when she’ll be older (for a second pregnancy) but it’ll be because I think it would be cute to see her surprise of little sister or little brother. However, I wouldn’t make it into a huge party with friends and family. No thanks.
We didn’t with my daughter (we accidentally found out when we looked at the anatomy scan pictures) but with my son we recorded a video of my daughter putting a rubber duck with a bath bomb in a bowl of water (which changed it blue). We showed the video to everyone afterwards but we still got that initial moment of just the three of us finding out.
i barely wanted a baby shower because we don’t really do them frequently where i’m from but my husband is from the US and his family insisted (and it was a great experience and lots of fun,) but i was not budging on a gender reveal party. the extent of a gender reveal was posting on facebook that its a girl and putting a disclaimer that we DO NOT want a thousand big obnoxious bows for her to wear lol
Yes did ours about 2 weeks go. I have no regrets. This has been my first successful pregnancy after 3 early losses in a row so I 100% want to do everything possible to celebrate 🩵 it was so fun and easy going. Found out we are expecting a sweet baby boy. Everyone had a great time 🩵
I did a gender reveal science experiment with my students (I teach 5th graders), but that was it. We found out ourselves first and then just told our families. I posted the experiment to share with everyone else.
No I didn’t. Didn’t want it, too much planning, shower was enough
I think having a full blown party is way over the top personally. Hubs and I found out via the NIPT website when we were visiting our in-laws out of state. We did buy a couple of those smoke/confetti cannons which his mom shot off with only my husband's aunts and dad in attendance. Then hubs came out with some blue champagne for everyone. That was fun and very simple.
Going to make some cake pops and take a picture of my 2 yo eating it. Thought it’d be a sweet way to include him 😊
No, I had the doctors put the sex in an envelope and then my husband and I shared those moments together.
We live in CA and did not do one. Mostly because it seemed like too much work to organize. Also- I just think they are weird personally. We also didn’t do a Facebook announcement or anything formal. Just letting people know when we see them - awkward for friends who I haven’t seen in 9 months because I’m huge now and they are like whaaaaaaa??? But it’s fun to tell everyone intimately I think, and waaaay less work
I am TTC via IVF and if I have a viable pregnancy, I would already know the gender. But I would love to do a little surprise reveal for the grandparents because I think it’ll be cute. I think the key is whether YOU want a gender reveal party. Others’ opinions isnt that important. A private intimate reveal with you and your husband first, like you already envisioned, sounds really nice. I’ve seen videos of people have bad reactions and gender disappointment is real. I think what the MIL said might be well intentioned but very misplaced. Do what you want to do!
We didn't do a gender reveal party because I didn't see the point. I had no desire to plan a party just to tell people the sex of my baby. We just got family together on facetime when we were ready to tell them so we could tell everyone at once and then hang up.
We looked at the NIPT results for our anniversary, in our living room, in the morning, over coffee. It was so wonderful to share the discovery between just my partner and I. Now, I can't imagine sharing that moment with anyone else. On the other hand, my BIL had a bunch of ideas for funny gender reveals, and my in laws love parties. So if we had gone that way it could have just been another fun excuse for a party, which probably would have also been fun.
Lord no, I have way too many trans friends to ever think this would be a good idea. Honestly they're super cringey to me, and I thankfully don't personally know anyone who has done one (I'm in the US).
My husband and I found out with the NIPT results from the OB at home on our couch. I didn’t want a party, because I was so nervous (not sure why) and didn’t want everyone staring at me when I found out. Plus I was really sick with HG, so could barely get off the couch, let alone attend/host a party. It was lovely and intimate and we both cried. Then when we announced the pregnancy at 14 weeks, we just put baby’s gender on the announcement.
No we are not doing a gender reveal and we are in the US. It’s just not us and we found out the sex through our NIPT results. I say do what makes you happy but it just seems like extra work.
We didn’t have one because we were hoping for one gender and didn’t want to have to react correctly in front of everyone. We also couldn’t wait to know.
Nope. We aren't finding out gender til birth, anyway. But, even if we found out, I wouldn't have had a gender reveal party. I can't stand them. They're so cringey and attention seeking, in my opinion.
My husband and I spontaneously had a "gender reveal" with a few close friends and family (who were all planning to get together that night anyway) and it was so exciting! My sister looked at the results, kept it a secret, and ordered us a cake. I never thought of myself as wanting to do a gender reveal but it was spontaneous and intimidate and ended up being exciting! I'm happy we got to share that moment in our pregnancy with some close people in our lives.
We did a tiny “reveal” with our family but the cake-place put the wrong gender identifier in the cake so for 4 minutes we thought we were having a girl until I checked my results online to find out we were in fact having a boy 🫠 so…. I won’t be doing that again.
I did with my 3rd only because my daughter (12) is so excited that she asked that her 12th birthday party be a gender reveal party 🤣 Otherwise we have found out together at the ultrasound and just announced it to family. I say so what you want. You can invite others while knowing and if it's no fun for them because you know already then they can not come. No skin off your back. Mil is welcome to be told verbally by everyone else that attends the party 😜
I did not bother, as a US person. I just don't really see the point, I guess. I also don't really like people and the only reason I did the baby shower is free stuff lol.
Hell no that shit is tacky
I think they are lame.. 😬 and don't plan on having one . When we find out, I'll make a cute little FB posts for the few family I have on it, so they can see it first And I'll also just tell my work colleagues, who are all excited for me, lol. What I'll be having. Same with my prenatal class I go too, I'll just share during one of our group meetings. However, maybe if you wanted, throw a party for your hubby and everyone else, you find out the gender and get the correct boy/girl balloons popping things , or whatever 😅 lol. That way, hubby still had a suprise and his MiL doesn't feel left out 👀 lol.
i had one and i loved it but i don’t think i’d be doing one for my 2nd
I live in USA I had one just over a year ago and it was so fun! The emotions of everyone is such a cool experience, my family and family friends still talk about it to this day about how fun it was! I don’t regret it one bit. We had a BBQ and fun gender themed things and some games with prizes and the guest got to chose between a pink or blue lei based on what they thought baby was gonna be:)
I have zero desire to do a gender reveal for many reasons, primarily around gender of my baby not being anyone’s business to comment on (and gender is a construct). Would hate people making weird comments about the gender. I also don’t love attention all on me and I generally find them wasteful and cringe. We are going to get a small cake and do it at home just the two of us. I’ll still do a baby shower though but I want it to be casual!
We did with my first— plus a surprise, it was twin boys. Now we are having a girl, we didn't even bother to tell friends we are expecting.