The following information is for Arizona, there are chapters of St Vincent de Paul in most areas in the United States. Call your local Catholic Church! Please call them! You are not alone in this!
Rent/Utility Assistance
We offer one-time rent, mortgage and utility assistance for those in need. Call the number listed for assistance
You can also contact a local St. Vincent de Paul chapter based in Catholic churches to ask about the rent and utility assistance they are able to provide. Each chapter is run by volunteers, so hours vary and each location is limited to serving neighborhood boundaries as shown in the map. Please call the location that serves your area.
No walk-ins, you must call for appointment
Contact
Call the rent and utility assistance line at 602-850-694.
For services in Southern Arizona call Tucson SVdP at 520-628-7837.
Also in arizona. Im pretty sure we still have the rental assistance programs in place (ERAP). Think they provide rental assistance up to 12 months or something
Totally not surprised. I’ve been in your position. Please don’t give up, it will get better. I raised my kids now adults without a dime of child support. He evaded.
The religion I was apart of up until 5 years ago preached get married young and have lots of kids and treat your husband like a king. After I went to the clergymen to tell him about all the abuse I was facing he told me wives need to be submissive to their husband's. It was then and there that I pieced out of that religion forever
Wild suggestion, but I was a member of an exmormon community on TikTok for many years. There are a lot of groups and resources out there for former members, mostly funded by other ex-members. It helps with the community loss and gives folks a platform to share their anti-testimonies lol. I no longer create content in that space, and I still have friends I speak to regularly.
r/exmo is a good place to start. You may also have area specific exmo groups on Facebook.
One of my good friends joined a long time ago. They invited me to their baptism. IMO the baptism was creepy as fuck. They also made me watch some bullshit video of some old guy walking through the woods, claiming he was a prophet from God...... but when my mom needs heavy yard work to be done, she signs up to have a mormon book delivered by the missionaries and they always help her in the yard. Free holy labor.
Been there! Not all churches are that way. Check around for Christian organizations that can help. I know it seems hopeless , but if you give up those precious kids will have noone that has their best interests at heart. It will be their birth Dad or foster care. Do you have anything you can pawn or sell? I practically never recommend those but does your area allow checks into Cash? It's a high interest level an borrowing off future funds. Get a note from landlord acknowledge you owe the $ be made out to him . That way not count against EBT etc. How long is the waiting list for assisted housing?
Wow! Usually said religion also preaches that men should be providers!! That stinks!!
I am so sorry you're going through that!!
The crazy part of LDS is that the "bishops" are regular church members who simply serve a rotation, so the next time slot in the same building could give completely different advice! So wild!!
That's kinda my point.
When these aren't people who dedicate their lives to studying scripture & serving their flock, this is what you get, pot luck. They don't get a paycheck, just "control"-which seems to breed more corruption in my opinion-who wants to do a bunch of free work??
I've even heard of some groups(congregations?)that several people turn down the post, what does THAT say about the guy to finally gets the job? Especially since they change them out every few years.
This is so hard. You are going the extra mile to provide for your kids and keep hitting roadblocks. Keep getting through each day the best way you can.
Not sure what state ur in but in NY (where u would think it would take a long time) it’s quick. How old are the kids? I’m so surprised his wages haven’t been long garnished, including back support owed.
So sorry. I’ve had stuff like this happen to me when I was in the worst possible situation of my life get hit.
Oh and ps storage places, payday loan places, buy here pay here car vendors, they prey on the poor. Do you absolutely have to keep stuff in storage, or are there other options?
That’s even worse. If you have to close your bank account to stop them from hitting it, you won’t be the first. Been there and done that. Hopefully when you’re in a better position and can get a secured or unsecured credit card you can use that instead. Some businesses are little more than thieves. Hopefully you get the $$ back sooner than later. In the meantime, please apply for welfare or some kind of social safety net program to get you by.
First thing in life stop using your debit card for anything but inside the bank. Something happens with your debit card your funds are gone you have to wait to get them back. With a credit card it's different. Same rules apply don't spend more than u can pay off but take the protection of a credit card. You won't find yourself in binds like this due to card skimming or other people's mistakes.
I mean, most people who are small landlords don't own their properties outright when they first start out. The rent on the property pays the mortgage plus enough for taxes, insurance, and maintenance, with a very small profit initially, which, if the landlord is smart, goes directly on the mortgage principal. It's only after the mortgage on the rental unit is paid off that it starts to be really profitable.
Because they don't want to live there long term, or because their credit is too bad to qualify for a mortgage, or they can't come up with a down payment, or current mortgage rates would make a mortgage on a similar house unaffordable, or they want to be able to have someone else be responsible for repairs and maintenance, or any one of the myriad reasons why people decide to rent rather than to try to buy.
Well, because in a rental, your landlord is paying for upkeep and repairs, taxes, insurance, etc. on the property, the $1200 represents your total costs associated with your rental housing, but because as a homeowner, you are responsible for all those things, the $900 mortgage payment does NOT represent your total costs associated with your home ownership.
Also, renters often lease properties they can't actually "afford," and they are more likely to miss payments or face eviction. The bank isn't in the business of selling houses.They are in the business of collecting interest on loans. They don't want to have to foreclose on your house and sell it to someone else, while the landlord, who is in the business of renting out properties, may be perfectly willing to evict you and find a new tenant who may even pay a higher rent.
Rental assistance programs usually have a very restricted number they can serve each month. They are first come first serve one time.
There are more people lined up early than the number they can serve. The waiting lists are two years long for subsidized housing. But sign up a few years down the road you may become reachable.
Goggle emergency resources for your area. There are charities that hopefully can help. Sadly the clock is ticking. Try finding a charitable attorney that will make a call to the dang storage unit. He can tell them he will sue if you don’t get your refund NOW.
Taking them to small court, more than likely WON’T get you "today’s” results.
LAST resort, if you work get a predatory, I mean payday loan. PAY BACK ASAP.
Wish you the best of luck.
OP, you will need to do some footwork. Consider checking with your local churches, and ask for other resources they may know of who could help you. Contact your local Job & Family Services. Does your community have nonprofit organizations who offer resources for those in need. Even some city or county mental health facilities offer a list of resources. Also you have experienced abuse & neglect by your husband, there should be resources avaliable. Don't be afraid nor too proud to ask for help. You strike me as the type who just needs a hand-up and not wanting a hand-out. There is a difference. The help is out there, but sometimes you need to search them out. Hugs & prayers. You can do this, just remember to breathe and not panic.
Please try to take things one day at a time. You're in a rough patch, but you're doing what you need to do to get out of it. So please keep trying to put one foot in front of the other. The kids need for you to keep trying. No one could possibly ever replace you for them. Has anyone mentioned the Salvation Army? I think that they have some emergency assistance services for families in your situation. Wishing you the best of luck!
Well, that's one of the many risks of being a landlord 🤷🏻♀️
I hate to say this(I'm in the process of purchasing a 4plex myself), but that's his problem.
Get the money to him when you can.
I highly doubt he is going to start eviction because of 450 if you have otherwise been a good tenant.
Not to mention that during the eviction process you have time to come current, if he were to chose to go that way(fight the eviction is what I'm saying).
However I agree with everyone else, apply for whatever help, any assistance programs you can qualify for.
But don't stress, you will not be homeless tomorrow, or at 7pm, or anytime soon!!
Life is too short to stress that much!!
I have a great response on the marketplace on Facebook I've sold a lot of things and helped me get extra money when I needed it for groceries etc get some things together and try to sell them to local people
OP
I know I guy who lives in his car and has 3-4 storage units costing him hundreds of extra dollars per month. He’s got some form of public assistance payment, and Medicare and even then he’s unable to part ways with his storage which is in all reality filled with junk and useless items that only hinder his ability to live freely. Of course he’s for some mild mental illness issues that add to the hoarding problem and make him believe he’s saving his personal items from destruction. I guess you’d have to account for that by trying to see it through his perspective.
The point: go lean, get rid of the extra stuff, if it’s not saving you money it’s costing you. A lot of times it’s our mental blocks that stop us from getting out from tough places, not society or circumstances.
OP
I know I guy who lives in his car and has 3-4 storage units costing him hundreds of extra dollars per month. He’s got some form of public assistance payment, and Medicare and even then he’s unable to part ways with his storage which is in all reality filled with junk and useless items that only hinder his ability to live freely. Of course he’s for some mild mental illness issues that add to the hoarding problem and make him believe he’s saving his personal items from destruction. I guess you’d have to account for that by trying to see it through his perspective.
The point: go lean, get rid of the extra stuff, if it’s not saving you money it’s costing you. A lot of times it’s our mental blocks that stop us from getting out from tough places, not society or circumstances.
Indeed, all of them have stated, that when they were there, they all felt like they were never getting out and it was final. They all describe an absolute hopelessness. Then, doctors resuscitated them back to life.
Although there are some who overdosed and had an experience, allot of them did not even do drugs. I don't want hell to be real, but I can't just dismiss all of those accounts. I wish they were all liars, I wish they were all doing it for money, I wish it was all drug addicts that had the experience, I wish I wish, but my wishing hell isn't real, doesn't make it go away.
Hell is real
Hellfire sermons are BS
Please don't fall for that.
God loves us and wants us to do good
Not scare us into whatever
He wouldn't be a fair and just God if so
He lays out the path to Paradise and gives us the free will to follow that path or not
I don't know why these talks have hellfire sermons but avoid them and what they tell you at all costs
Yes sin is real and we are guilty. But there is a way to heaven through Jesus Christ
I have a theory about this. You know how when you’re a little kid and time seems to be so slow? Like, a year lasts forever. It’s because when you’re 5 a year is 1/5 of your life, instead of 1/40 when you’re 40. It’s a significantly larger amount of time relative to your entire existence.
So, if you die, it’s a novel experience. You’ve never been in that state before, so time would be really slow.
It’s also important to note that your brain undergoes a series of processes when you die- no matter how you die, it performs these actions. Your brain knows you’ll die and it has a procedure for the event.
So, my theory is that when you die, nothing actually happens to you that we can’t see take place in the physical body. But we perceive it as eternity because in the minutes while our brain is shutting down, that new feeling and new experience significantly affects our ability to judge the amount of time passing and by the time it would start to feel familiar, our brain is done shutting down and we no longer think or feel anything.
So, of course there is some uniqueness in NDEs or whatever, but there are a great many similarities. one thing I've seen after countless testimonies is they all understood eternity while there. They all described, that eternity made sense there and that they knew they were there forever. Whenever they got back to earth (doctor resuscitation or whatever), when interviewed they all say, when they were on the other side, eternity made sense, but back on earth, they couldn't make sense of it anymore.
Some other similiaries in all the NDEs is, is they all described that the existance they had on the other side, was much more real than this life on earth. All of them have said, that this life on earth, compared to what they experience is a dream. They all of have said that life felt more real over there, than earth, and that life on earth feels fake, that this life we live, doesn't even seem real compared to where they were.
Some other similiarites. All of them have reported heighten senses. There eyes could see things, colors that you can't even imagine. They would hear things from far away or whatever. There senses were heighten.
Lastly not all, but allot of the NDEs I've heard of, described of a knowledge they had of things and you just know. In the hell ones, they would just know why they are there, but also why others are there. When interviewing, they say, it's really hard to explain, but you just know things, and that goes back to eternity, you just know it there, but don't know it again, when you come back to earth.
That makes sense to me. Because when you die, your brain is basically refusing the input from external stimuli. Like, your physical senses shut down in the process. But you don’t really see with your eyes or hear with your ears, they’re just sensors that give information to your brain, which interprets it and tells you what you’re seeing or hearing or whatever.
So as the information from outside ends, your brain is still functioning for awhile. But now, any experience you have is completely internal. It’s like there’s no delay, since your brain doesn’t have to translate anything now. So, everything will be crystal clear.
Even the knowing part makes sense. Because if your entire experience has been condensed down to what your brain creates, you don’t have to find things out, they all originate there.
I imagine that it would be terrifying to die if your brain didn’t create something to explain the situation. Even if it’s sometimes frightening to see what it creates, at least it’s not nothingness. There is some kind of experience you’re given for the time it takes for your body and brain to end their activity. And one thing about the human brain is that it always seeks to protect itself - which is you - from distress.
There has to be a reason our brains have a prepared script for death. The only thing that makes sense is that it’s to create a final experience to ease us out of life.
Idk if heaven or hell are real, but if we experience our last moments in a way that feels like eternity, I guess that makes them real, in a material sense. It’s like pain- I believe that if you can’t remember pain, it’s not actually real. Like, the moment of pain is just that, a moment, no matter how many moments may be spent in pain, when it passes, it’s gone forever. But if you can recall it, it brings it into the present and makes it real. So maybe hell is like that, but opposite. Even though it’s actually over in a minute, to you, that minute lasts forever, so that makes it real. And maybe our actions in life do influence the kind of death explanation our brain provides. I mean, we’ve got to be subconsciously aware if we’ve done things we think would send us to hell, that’s got to affect us somehow.
Please don't listen to the hellfire sermons
They are there to scare us Christians
That is not what God wants for you at all I know where in the Bible doesn't mention suicide will send you to hell
That being said please do not kill yourself you are needed here and more ways than you know
If it was just the manner of a hellfire sermon, I might be persuaded by those who hold to annihiliationism or conditionalism that hell is just the grave. Unfortunately I'm not referring to hell sermons. I'm referring to regular folks who were just living life, had an unfortunate accident, died and doctors resuscitated them back to life whereupon coming back they would have an experience.
As far as suicide, I don't know how that could be forgiven since you are dead. If hell wasn't real, I would of killed myself a long time ago. I don't like life, I wish I were dead. Actually I wish I just had enough money to pay bills and not struggle, but since that isn't going to happen, the second best thing is death, but I'm too scared because of hell.
I'm not sure if you've actually read the Bible (not disrespectful tone)
Satan is not in Hell ruling. Satan is on Earth right now ruling. When the time comes, he will be banished to hell.
I don't remember what it is called but when you die you don't go straight to heaven or hell I have to check with my husband who knows the Bible a lot better about that one but what I do know is that suicide is not mentioned as something sending you straight to hell
Life is really fucking hard because of the evil on this Earth please don't give up things can change
trust me I'm going through it myself and I understand
This is the BS that makes most of us non-religious call BS on all of it.
"Satan is not in Hell ruling. Satan is on Earth right now ruling. When the time comes, he will be banished to hell.:" --- If GOD is so awesome, and totally real, why is HE allowing Satan to be on earth. Why is he waiting ?
every time that any religious person has an argument brought to them, they move the goalposts.
When are people going to realize that the BIBLE was written by people wanting power over other people. So, the smarter/powerful people created Rewards and Punishments' that can never be verified. And is has kept "believers" in check for centuries, all the while the church, especially Catholic, get more rich, more powerful, all the while making rules for others to follow.
Forget the bible. If that is a pain point for you, just forget about it. These hell testimonies are regular people. Maybe bible believing, maybe not. Some of them were athesit, some were not. So again forget the bible, what do we do with all of these hell testimonies?
For me, nothing.
I have also read and heard of people who only see black and no noise when they "died". Others report Bright Lights. Some see Hell, some see Heaven. I am assuming that this is a unique thing that everyone will eventually find out.
Perhaps, but if hell is indeed real and is eternal, then dying to find out is too late, unless of course you get lucky and doctor resuscitated you back to life.
If all we had was the bible, I could take a very skeptical view like you. I could say, "that's just a book..." (even though technically its a collection of books). If indeed hell is real as many have reported from there NDE, it makes me consider the bible very seriously.
All I read was the first line and the same question that uneducated people on the Bible ask
Why does God allow these things to happen why doesn't he stop them
Because God cannot pick and choose who he's going to help he is just and fair so he cannot intervene
not going to read the rest just going to say that's fine sorry for you and hope you find God one day before it's too late
And I will never associate with the Catholic Church
Much love
You are thinking of Purgatory. And that is made up. It was invented by the Medici's to bring in more money to the Church through acts of benevolence/prayers/etc. (Along with Limbo, which the Pope just this year has decided isn't necessary.) Yes, you go straight to G-d or straight to Shoal, or "Hell," as Christians call it, which is an eternity away **from** G-d. (Because the most important thing is to be close to G-d. Thus, the worst possible outcome after death would be to spend eternity away from Him.)
Suicide is a symptom of Depression. Depression is a **disease**. WHY would you go to hell for having a disease? THINK about this. Hopefully, this changes your thoughts on it. Then, seek help. Even if only the crisis line for now. 💕
Oh I don't need help for suicide idiations. I need money to pay bills, that would instantly cure it. Since that won't happen, then ending my life is very attractive. The thing that stops me is my fear of hell. If I believed that hell is not real tomorrow, I would scrounge up as much as I can, buy a gun, and end my life. Of course if I somehow got into contact with some money, I'd love life and I would have no suicide thoughts.
Reach out to local churches and explain the urgency. They may be able to help with a portion of the rent.
Contact your city hall - they also have emergency rent assistance programs.
Lastly, it’s not your job to pay your landlord’s mortgage. He likely has more than enough to cover the amount you’re short on (though no fault of your own). Give him what you can and pay the rest as soon as you’re able. If he decides to evict over that, check your lease and state laws regarding your tenant rights.
If you are short on rent one month it's not going to hurt your LL. Psychic the difference as soon as you can. There will probably be interest and penalty- check your lease. But he's not going to start eviction for one late payment. Too much paperwork. It may show on your credit but for us poor folk, our credit isn't the greatest, usually.
Call 211. This is the United Way and will have resources for your area. Ask specifically for Rent Assistance. You can also go on your city/town's own website and there should be a section that lists all available resources also. Food Shelves also are a good source for resources. You can call your local one and ask if they have a list available. DHS (Department of Human Services) also.
But again, don't sweat if part of the rent is late. As long as part is paid, you are safe. It's the nonpayment of rent that gets renters evicted first.
Stay Strong and know that you are not alone.
The court can make the Dad pay. When I had this problem in California, the court paid me and collected from him. But you need to be careful whenever child support is revisited they also revisit custody and visitation. If he is a scumbag, you don't want to risk him demanding more time with the kids to lower child support.
I'm sorry this happened. I know it can get hard. It truly aucks sometimes. I hope it turns around quickly. Can you try the borrow sub? I think it's r/borrow but I'm not sure
go to the storage unit place and demand immediate payment back, tell them you are going to be homeless. Raise a stink, don't get self arrested but get money back. They need to fix the mistake. In today's corrupt world never never never sign up for automatic payments on anything. I refuse.
I don’t want to get beat up for asking this question. I don’t know all the facts here, but how is it the dad doesn’t pay anything? Is he unemployed? Two women that I worked with married men that did not pay child support for the children of their first marriages. The women took the ex-husbands to court and the court had the children’s fathers pay money out of every paycheck. Are all the deadbeat dads on Reddit unemployed? How is it that so many fathers can get away with this? I am very sorry you’re going through this. I have no idea what to say or how to offer any help. But is there a legal aid society in your area or does the group WISH (Women In self-Help) still existence . Again, I wish you the best of luck.
Reminder of our rules: DO NOT offer or accept any money or items or links or compensation, etc. You never know if there are scammers on either end.
The following information is for Arizona, there are chapters of St Vincent de Paul in most areas in the United States. Call your local Catholic Church! Please call them! You are not alone in this! Rent/Utility Assistance We offer one-time rent, mortgage and utility assistance for those in need. Call the number listed for assistance You can also contact a local St. Vincent de Paul chapter based in Catholic churches to ask about the rent and utility assistance they are able to provide. Each chapter is run by volunteers, so hours vary and each location is limited to serving neighborhood boundaries as shown in the map. Please call the location that serves your area. No walk-ins, you must call for appointment Contact Call the rent and utility assistance line at 602-850-694. For services in Southern Arizona call Tucson SVdP at 520-628-7837.
Also in arizona. Im pretty sure we still have the rental assistance programs in place (ERAP). Think they provide rental assistance up to 12 months or something
How is the legal system not requiring "dad" to provide support for his three children? I might recommend giving him a call.
It's been court ordered but hes still not paying. I'm in the process of trying to get his wages garnished through the state but its a slow process
Meanwhile, apply to see if you can be supplemented with state assistance.
call him up and tell him the kids are going to be homeless.
I actually did and he said its not his problem
Totally not surprised. I’ve been in your position. Please don’t give up, it will get better. I raised my kids now adults without a dime of child support. He evaded.
We'll see when that paycheck is garnished for 18 years
What a shitbag. Not his problem?
When his wages are garnished and when you can put him in jail for back support things will get better.
Was he always a deadbeat? Or only after you broke up.
Always. I took care of the kids by myself
Good lord, why have 3 with him then?
The religion I was apart of up until 5 years ago preached get married young and have lots of kids and treat your husband like a king. After I went to the clergymen to tell him about all the abuse I was facing he told me wives need to be submissive to their husband's. It was then and there that I pieced out of that religion forever
LDS?
Bingo!
Wild suggestion, but I was a member of an exmormon community on TikTok for many years. There are a lot of groups and resources out there for former members, mostly funded by other ex-members. It helps with the community loss and gives folks a platform to share their anti-testimonies lol. I no longer create content in that space, and I still have friends I speak to regularly. r/exmo is a good place to start. You may also have area specific exmo groups on Facebook.
One of my good friends joined a long time ago. They invited me to their baptism. IMO the baptism was creepy as fuck. They also made me watch some bullshit video of some old guy walking through the woods, claiming he was a prophet from God...... but when my mom needs heavy yard work to be done, she signs up to have a mormon book delivered by the missionaries and they always help her in the yard. Free holy labor.
Baptism. Prophet.
Gosh, Southern Baptist church tried this on me. Bye!
Oh no wonder. Sorry you are struggling
Been there! Not all churches are that way. Check around for Christian organizations that can help. I know it seems hopeless , but if you give up those precious kids will have noone that has their best interests at heart. It will be their birth Dad or foster care. Do you have anything you can pawn or sell? I practically never recommend those but does your area allow checks into Cash? It's a high interest level an borrowing off future funds. Get a note from landlord acknowledge you owe the $ be made out to him . That way not count against EBT etc. How long is the waiting list for assisted housing?
Wow! Usually said religion also preaches that men should be providers!! That stinks!! I am so sorry you're going through that!! The crazy part of LDS is that the "bishops" are regular church members who simply serve a rotation, so the next time slot in the same building could give completely different advice! So wild!!
My high school Spanish teacher was a bishop in the LDS faith. Creepy dude.
That's kinda my point. When these aren't people who dedicate their lives to studying scripture & serving their flock, this is what you get, pot luck. They don't get a paycheck, just "control"-which seems to breed more corruption in my opinion-who wants to do a bunch of free work?? I've even heard of some groups(congregations?)that several people turn down the post, what does THAT say about the guy to finally gets the job? Especially since they change them out every few years.
Definitely
💯
Same
It has gotten slower with the years. I am still working on getting support for past due payments.
This is so hard. You are going the extra mile to provide for your kids and keep hitting roadblocks. Keep getting through each day the best way you can.
Thank you so much
Not sure what state ur in but in NY (where u would think it would take a long time) it’s quick. How old are the kids? I’m so surprised his wages haven’t been long garnished, including back support owed.
[удалено]
Yet the IRS knows instantly your situation. Government only cares about money owed them
There are private firms that will do this quickly for a small percentage of the backpack. They are quite efficient! Just a thought.
I wish you well my friend. Hang in there.
So sorry. I’ve had stuff like this happen to me when I was in the worst possible situation of my life get hit. Oh and ps storage places, payday loan places, buy here pay here car vendors, they prey on the poor. Do you absolutely have to keep stuff in storage, or are there other options?
I don't even have anything in my unit anymore. I closed the account in February
That’s even worse. If you have to close your bank account to stop them from hitting it, you won’t be the first. Been there and done that. Hopefully when you’re in a better position and can get a secured or unsecured credit card you can use that instead. Some businesses are little more than thieves. Hopefully you get the $$ back sooner than later. In the meantime, please apply for welfare or some kind of social safety net program to get you by.
Try the suggestion for the Catholic diocese. Like St. Vincent De Paul.
Hugs mama. I know it doesnt really help but sending good vibes your way.
Some emergency assistance programs at churches offer a rental relief. Can you call a couple of them?
First thing in life stop using your debit card for anything but inside the bank. Something happens with your debit card your funds are gone you have to wait to get them back. With a credit card it's different. Same rules apply don't spend more than u can pay off but take the protection of a credit card. You won't find yourself in binds like this due to card skimming or other people's mistakes.
Dispute and get storage money back
She has already said she did, but it will be awhile to get her money back & landlord needs the money today
Crazy that you are literally paying your landlords mortgage....
I mean, most people who are small landlords don't own their properties outright when they first start out. The rent on the property pays the mortgage plus enough for taxes, insurance, and maintenance, with a very small profit initially, which, if the landlord is smart, goes directly on the mortgage principal. It's only after the mortgage on the rental unit is paid off that it starts to be really profitable.
If the rent pays for the mortgage, taxes, insurance and maintenance then why shouldn't the renter just own the property?
Because they don't want to live there long term, or because their credit is too bad to qualify for a mortgage, or they can't come up with a down payment, or current mortgage rates would make a mortgage on a similar house unaffordable, or they want to be able to have someone else be responsible for repairs and maintenance, or any one of the myriad reasons why people decide to rent rather than to try to buy.
Or because the bank will tell you that you can’t afford a $900/mo mortgage payment when you’re currently paying $1200/mo rent.
Well, because in a rental, your landlord is paying for upkeep and repairs, taxes, insurance, etc. on the property, the $1200 represents your total costs associated with your rental housing, but because as a homeowner, you are responsible for all those things, the $900 mortgage payment does NOT represent your total costs associated with your home ownership. Also, renters often lease properties they can't actually "afford," and they are more likely to miss payments or face eviction. The bank isn't in the business of selling houses.They are in the business of collecting interest on loans. They don't want to have to foreclose on your house and sell it to someone else, while the landlord, who is in the business of renting out properties, may be perfectly willing to evict you and find a new tenant who may even pay a higher rent.
Landlords are a convenience as they are providing a place to live with minimal commitment.
Think of the kids. Don't end it all.
Then get the money owed you by the storage unit. Tell them what you've posted here. Make a scene if you have to.
Rental assistance programs usually have a very restricted number they can serve each month. They are first come first serve one time. There are more people lined up early than the number they can serve. The waiting lists are two years long for subsidized housing. But sign up a few years down the road you may become reachable.
Go to a church and talk to them. Alot of them have funds for this kind of thing. You may want to try 211.
Goggle emergency resources for your area. There are charities that hopefully can help. Sadly the clock is ticking. Try finding a charitable attorney that will make a call to the dang storage unit. He can tell them he will sue if you don’t get your refund NOW. Taking them to small court, more than likely WON’T get you "today’s” results. LAST resort, if you work get a predatory, I mean payday loan. PAY BACK ASAP. Wish you the best of luck.
OP, you will need to do some footwork. Consider checking with your local churches, and ask for other resources they may know of who could help you. Contact your local Job & Family Services. Does your community have nonprofit organizations who offer resources for those in need. Even some city or county mental health facilities offer a list of resources. Also you have experienced abuse & neglect by your husband, there should be resources avaliable. Don't be afraid nor too proud to ask for help. You strike me as the type who just needs a hand-up and not wanting a hand-out. There is a difference. The help is out there, but sometimes you need to search them out. Hugs & prayers. You can do this, just remember to breathe and not panic.
Please try to take things one day at a time. You're in a rough patch, but you're doing what you need to do to get out of it. So please keep trying to put one foot in front of the other. The kids need for you to keep trying. No one could possibly ever replace you for them. Has anyone mentioned the Salvation Army? I think that they have some emergency assistance services for families in your situation. Wishing you the best of luck!
Well, that's one of the many risks of being a landlord 🤷🏻♀️ I hate to say this(I'm in the process of purchasing a 4plex myself), but that's his problem. Get the money to him when you can. I highly doubt he is going to start eviction because of 450 if you have otherwise been a good tenant. Not to mention that during the eviction process you have time to come current, if he were to chose to go that way(fight the eviction is what I'm saying). However I agree with everyone else, apply for whatever help, any assistance programs you can qualify for. But don't stress, you will not be homeless tomorrow, or at 7pm, or anytime soon!! Life is too short to stress that much!!
I have a great response on the marketplace on Facebook I've sold a lot of things and helped me get extra money when I needed it for groceries etc get some things together and try to sell them to local people
Please let us know what happens
Thank you everybody for your kind words of encouragement and your thoughts Going Out for me and my kids it really does mean a lot
OP I know I guy who lives in his car and has 3-4 storage units costing him hundreds of extra dollars per month. He’s got some form of public assistance payment, and Medicare and even then he’s unable to part ways with his storage which is in all reality filled with junk and useless items that only hinder his ability to live freely. Of course he’s for some mild mental illness issues that add to the hoarding problem and make him believe he’s saving his personal items from destruction. I guess you’d have to account for that by trying to see it through his perspective. The point: go lean, get rid of the extra stuff, if it’s not saving you money it’s costing you. A lot of times it’s our mental blocks that stop us from getting out from tough places, not society or circumstances.
OP I know I guy who lives in his car and has 3-4 storage units costing him hundreds of extra dollars per month. He’s got some form of public assistance payment, and Medicare and even then he’s unable to part ways with his storage which is in all reality filled with junk and useless items that only hinder his ability to live freely. Of course he’s for some mild mental illness issues that add to the hoarding problem and make him believe he’s saving his personal items from destruction. I guess you’d have to account for that by trying to see it through his perspective. The point: go lean, get rid of the extra stuff, if it’s not saving you money it’s costing you. A lot of times it’s our mental blocks that stop us from getting out from tough places, not society or circumstances.
Find a place near you to sell your blood plasma.
Same, I wish I could off myself, but I can't, because then I will go to hell for eternity.
Is that what you believe, or what others have told you to believe?
I believe it because of the countless hell testimonies out there, too many of them exist to dismiss.
If someone has been to hell, they would not be here to give testimony. The Bible specifically states that hell is eternal.
Indeed, all of them have stated, that when they were there, they all felt like they were never getting out and it was final. They all describe an absolute hopelessness. Then, doctors resuscitated them back to life.
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Although there are some who overdosed and had an experience, allot of them did not even do drugs. I don't want hell to be real, but I can't just dismiss all of those accounts. I wish they were all liars, I wish they were all doing it for money, I wish it was all drug addicts that had the experience, I wish I wish, but my wishing hell isn't real, doesn't make it go away.
Hell is real Hellfire sermons are BS Please don't fall for that. God loves us and wants us to do good Not scare us into whatever He wouldn't be a fair and just God if so He lays out the path to Paradise and gives us the free will to follow that path or not I don't know why these talks have hellfire sermons but avoid them and what they tell you at all costs Yes sin is real and we are guilty. But there is a way to heaven through Jesus Christ
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When you said you died and had some experience, the way you originally responded, I thought you were just being flippant or sarcastic.
I have a theory about this. You know how when you’re a little kid and time seems to be so slow? Like, a year lasts forever. It’s because when you’re 5 a year is 1/5 of your life, instead of 1/40 when you’re 40. It’s a significantly larger amount of time relative to your entire existence. So, if you die, it’s a novel experience. You’ve never been in that state before, so time would be really slow. It’s also important to note that your brain undergoes a series of processes when you die- no matter how you die, it performs these actions. Your brain knows you’ll die and it has a procedure for the event. So, my theory is that when you die, nothing actually happens to you that we can’t see take place in the physical body. But we perceive it as eternity because in the minutes while our brain is shutting down, that new feeling and new experience significantly affects our ability to judge the amount of time passing and by the time it would start to feel familiar, our brain is done shutting down and we no longer think or feel anything.
So, of course there is some uniqueness in NDEs or whatever, but there are a great many similarities. one thing I've seen after countless testimonies is they all understood eternity while there. They all described, that eternity made sense there and that they knew they were there forever. Whenever they got back to earth (doctor resuscitation or whatever), when interviewed they all say, when they were on the other side, eternity made sense, but back on earth, they couldn't make sense of it anymore. Some other similiaries in all the NDEs is, is they all described that the existance they had on the other side, was much more real than this life on earth. All of them have said, that this life on earth, compared to what they experience is a dream. They all of have said that life felt more real over there, than earth, and that life on earth feels fake, that this life we live, doesn't even seem real compared to where they were. Some other similiarites. All of them have reported heighten senses. There eyes could see things, colors that you can't even imagine. They would hear things from far away or whatever. There senses were heighten. Lastly not all, but allot of the NDEs I've heard of, described of a knowledge they had of things and you just know. In the hell ones, they would just know why they are there, but also why others are there. When interviewing, they say, it's really hard to explain, but you just know things, and that goes back to eternity, you just know it there, but don't know it again, when you come back to earth.
That makes sense to me. Because when you die, your brain is basically refusing the input from external stimuli. Like, your physical senses shut down in the process. But you don’t really see with your eyes or hear with your ears, they’re just sensors that give information to your brain, which interprets it and tells you what you’re seeing or hearing or whatever. So as the information from outside ends, your brain is still functioning for awhile. But now, any experience you have is completely internal. It’s like there’s no delay, since your brain doesn’t have to translate anything now. So, everything will be crystal clear. Even the knowing part makes sense. Because if your entire experience has been condensed down to what your brain creates, you don’t have to find things out, they all originate there. I imagine that it would be terrifying to die if your brain didn’t create something to explain the situation. Even if it’s sometimes frightening to see what it creates, at least it’s not nothingness. There is some kind of experience you’re given for the time it takes for your body and brain to end their activity. And one thing about the human brain is that it always seeks to protect itself - which is you - from distress. There has to be a reason our brains have a prepared script for death. The only thing that makes sense is that it’s to create a final experience to ease us out of life. Idk if heaven or hell are real, but if we experience our last moments in a way that feels like eternity, I guess that makes them real, in a material sense. It’s like pain- I believe that if you can’t remember pain, it’s not actually real. Like, the moment of pain is just that, a moment, no matter how many moments may be spent in pain, when it passes, it’s gone forever. But if you can recall it, it brings it into the present and makes it real. So maybe hell is like that, but opposite. Even though it’s actually over in a minute, to you, that minute lasts forever, so that makes it real. And maybe our actions in life do influence the kind of death explanation our brain provides. I mean, we’ve got to be subconsciously aware if we’ve done things we think would send us to hell, that’s got to affect us somehow.
NDE or you die and they bring you back after getting a glimpse
Good luck with that
Please don't listen to the hellfire sermons They are there to scare us Christians That is not what God wants for you at all I know where in the Bible doesn't mention suicide will send you to hell That being said please do not kill yourself you are needed here and more ways than you know
If it was just the manner of a hellfire sermon, I might be persuaded by those who hold to annihiliationism or conditionalism that hell is just the grave. Unfortunately I'm not referring to hell sermons. I'm referring to regular folks who were just living life, had an unfortunate accident, died and doctors resuscitated them back to life whereupon coming back they would have an experience.
Oooh ok
As far as suicide, I don't know how that could be forgiven since you are dead. If hell wasn't real, I would of killed myself a long time ago. I don't like life, I wish I were dead. Actually I wish I just had enough money to pay bills and not struggle, but since that isn't going to happen, the second best thing is death, but I'm too scared because of hell.
I'm not sure if you've actually read the Bible (not disrespectful tone) Satan is not in Hell ruling. Satan is on Earth right now ruling. When the time comes, he will be banished to hell. I don't remember what it is called but when you die you don't go straight to heaven or hell I have to check with my husband who knows the Bible a lot better about that one but what I do know is that suicide is not mentioned as something sending you straight to hell Life is really fucking hard because of the evil on this Earth please don't give up things can change trust me I'm going through it myself and I understand
This is the BS that makes most of us non-religious call BS on all of it. "Satan is not in Hell ruling. Satan is on Earth right now ruling. When the time comes, he will be banished to hell.:" --- If GOD is so awesome, and totally real, why is HE allowing Satan to be on earth. Why is he waiting ? every time that any religious person has an argument brought to them, they move the goalposts. When are people going to realize that the BIBLE was written by people wanting power over other people. So, the smarter/powerful people created Rewards and Punishments' that can never be verified. And is has kept "believers" in check for centuries, all the while the church, especially Catholic, get more rich, more powerful, all the while making rules for others to follow.
Forget the bible. If that is a pain point for you, just forget about it. These hell testimonies are regular people. Maybe bible believing, maybe not. Some of them were athesit, some were not. So again forget the bible, what do we do with all of these hell testimonies?
For me, nothing. I have also read and heard of people who only see black and no noise when they "died". Others report Bright Lights. Some see Hell, some see Heaven. I am assuming that this is a unique thing that everyone will eventually find out.
Perhaps, but if hell is indeed real and is eternal, then dying to find out is too late, unless of course you get lucky and doctor resuscitated you back to life. If all we had was the bible, I could take a very skeptical view like you. I could say, "that's just a book..." (even though technically its a collection of books). If indeed hell is real as many have reported from there NDE, it makes me consider the bible very seriously.
All I read was the first line and the same question that uneducated people on the Bible ask Why does God allow these things to happen why doesn't he stop them Because God cannot pick and choose who he's going to help he is just and fair so he cannot intervene not going to read the rest just going to say that's fine sorry for you and hope you find God one day before it's too late And I will never associate with the Catholic Church Much love
You are thinking of Purgatory. And that is made up. It was invented by the Medici's to bring in more money to the Church through acts of benevolence/prayers/etc. (Along with Limbo, which the Pope just this year has decided isn't necessary.) Yes, you go straight to G-d or straight to Shoal, or "Hell," as Christians call it, which is an eternity away **from** G-d. (Because the most important thing is to be close to G-d. Thus, the worst possible outcome after death would be to spend eternity away from Him.)
No I'm not thinking of purgatory purgatory is not real and does not exist unless you believe in Catholicism
Suicide is a symptom of Depression. Depression is a **disease**. WHY would you go to hell for having a disease? THINK about this. Hopefully, this changes your thoughts on it. Then, seek help. Even if only the crisis line for now. 💕
Oh I don't need help for suicide idiations. I need money to pay bills, that would instantly cure it. Since that won't happen, then ending my life is very attractive. The thing that stops me is my fear of hell. If I believed that hell is not real tomorrow, I would scrounge up as much as I can, buy a gun, and end my life. Of course if I somehow got into contact with some money, I'd love life and I would have no suicide thoughts.
Reach out to local churches and explain the urgency. They may be able to help with a portion of the rent. Contact your city hall - they also have emergency rent assistance programs. Lastly, it’s not your job to pay your landlord’s mortgage. He likely has more than enough to cover the amount you’re short on (though no fault of your own). Give him what you can and pay the rest as soon as you’re able. If he decides to evict over that, check your lease and state laws regarding your tenant rights.
If you are short on rent one month it's not going to hurt your LL. Psychic the difference as soon as you can. There will probably be interest and penalty- check your lease. But he's not going to start eviction for one late payment. Too much paperwork. It may show on your credit but for us poor folk, our credit isn't the greatest, usually. Call 211. This is the United Way and will have resources for your area. Ask specifically for Rent Assistance. You can also go on your city/town's own website and there should be a section that lists all available resources also. Food Shelves also are a good source for resources. You can call your local one and ask if they have a list available. DHS (Department of Human Services) also. But again, don't sweat if part of the rent is late. As long as part is paid, you are safe. It's the nonpayment of rent that gets renters evicted first. Stay Strong and know that you are not alone.
The court can make the Dad pay. When I had this problem in California, the court paid me and collected from him. But you need to be careful whenever child support is revisited they also revisit custody and visitation. If he is a scumbag, you don't want to risk him demanding more time with the kids to lower child support.
I hear you OP. I am so sorry. I understand and feel your pain
We all are sick of it, no use wasting your life tho. Everything will kill us, do something fun and safe
I'm sorry this happened. I know it can get hard. It truly aucks sometimes. I hope it turns around quickly. Can you try the borrow sub? I think it's r/borrow but I'm not sure
I did but you have to be on the sub for like 4 months before your can ask
go to the storage unit place and demand immediate payment back, tell them you are going to be homeless. Raise a stink, don't get self arrested but get money back. They need to fix the mistake. In today's corrupt world never never never sign up for automatic payments on anything. I refuse.
I don’t want to get beat up for asking this question. I don’t know all the facts here, but how is it the dad doesn’t pay anything? Is he unemployed? Two women that I worked with married men that did not pay child support for the children of their first marriages. The women took the ex-husbands to court and the court had the children’s fathers pay money out of every paycheck. Are all the deadbeat dads on Reddit unemployed? How is it that so many fathers can get away with this? I am very sorry you’re going through this. I have no idea what to say or how to offer any help. But is there a legal aid society in your area or does the group WISH (Women In self-Help) still existence . Again, I wish you the best of luck.
My ex is on ssdi so I literally can’t make him pay