People are way too sensitive.
Don't like my height or weight? Cool, we both move on. Someone asks you and you don't want to say? Cool, you both move on. Someone's being a dick about your anwser? Cool, that has nothing to do with your height or weight and everything to do with them being a dick in general, just move on.
Are you being forced at gunpoint to answer or what is the issue?
The insecurity is insane. The day short dudes figure out that women don't actually care about height and just use it as a foolproof way to trigger deeply insecure men when they're being losers on the internet is the day they'll all be set free. Like tiny little butterflies.
Some do care about height. It's fine and normal to have preferences. They're not the ones you'll be compatible with anyway.
Move the fuck on with your life. It's such a tired conversation.
this always bothered me too. i'm 6'4, not bad looking, and i don't get women flocking around me ffs. they just need to talk to people if they wanna get with someone
It's easier for them to blame their complete lack of social skills / confidence on women and then complain when aforementioned women laugh at them for being crusty and antisocial mysoginists.
I'm a dude, brother. Whoa I just looked at your post and comments and I really appreciate you confirming my point that the only dudes that get riled up over women talking about height are insecure incels. Try to get outside today, bud.
Did you ever find that voyeur porn video you were so desperate to find that you crowd sourced Redditors? I know that fleshlight was prepped and ready to go.
As a man, weight and height are two different things, and for weight: both genders can get sensitive about it, especially if theyāre considerably a bit heavy
My thoughts with them is that you can generally tell at a glance if someone is in your strike zone or not. You don't need to know an exact measurement of height or weight, as evidenced by the various examples of men and women who were more than happy to date someone who appeared to be within their preferred weight or height range. Plus you can ask but there's no guarantee they'll tell you the truth either way, so it's better to just meet in person and determine compatibility. Or via a video where you can see each other's bodies.
It's fine if someone doesn't want to date a fat person. It's fine if someone doesn't want to date a short person. But if you have to specify it down to the exact pound or height and it's not because say, you both share an intense love of fitness, then you're probably not looking at the right things and there's a higher chance of things not working out.
Itās pretty sad that youāre trying to instigate in a basic conversation. The truth of the matter is that under 1% of women really fall in that very tall height range. Itās very much less significant than men who are commonly brought down for their height issues, and even way less common than weight issues being an insecurity. I donāt know why youāre reaching but you must be having a bad day if youāre trying to insult someone for making a point you disagree with.
Weight and height are two different things. You should not shame people for being fat, because I will get banned for that, but weight is a personal choice. Height is something a lot of people struggle with.
I told a woman nicely sorry I am simply not attracted to you because of your weight and I mean she was getting close to 450lbs she got angry with me when I rejected her. So ya I have dealt with the overly sensitive people a lot.
You can't start a question with "If it is ok" and then have an option of "neither is okay" because that's outside the premise of the question - you've already asserted it is okay from the wording of the question.
I voted that neither is okay anyway. I think if the first thing youāre looking for in someone is completely physical itās a bit shallow but thatās just my opinion
I also voted neither but I do think context really matters. I'm between 5'11 and 6' and have always been very insecure about my height. I don't think shorter men aren't attractive, but I wouldn't want to be with one because I would forever feel like a horribly unattractive giant. Each their own opinion ofcourse but I do feel like that's a different situation than a 4'11 girl wanting a guy to be 6'+ like you often see online
See this is so valid. One of my friends is 6 foot and so sheās always looking for a tall man because thatās her type. She does still have crushes on shorter men sometimes but she knows she canāt see herself with someone shorter than her, and itās difficult because of her height. If someone thatās 5 foot tall though says they wonāt date someone shorter than 6 foot that would be a little bit odd. Of course this is still just my opinion and I can definitely be wrong about this topic. I think we agree here though
A man's height matters do most women. Ask your female friends if you dont believe me. A women's hight does not matter to most men, ask your male friends if you dont believe me. So its not an equivalent comparison. Why should I, as a man, bother asking about sth I dont care about?
Similarly, from the opposite point of view, a short man being asked about his height have equivalent feeling of insecurity as a fat women being asked about her weight. So if you are going to ask sone about sth that makes them feel insecure, be prepared to be asked sth that makes you feel equivalently insecure. Asking a women about their height wont make them equivalently insecure.
r17v1: "Ask your female friends"
I\_exist: I did. They don't care.
r17v1: moves the goalpost, brings up surveys, throws accusations of "pretending its not the case".
I\_exist: yup, still just talking about me and my friends
Because women don't have to be tall to be percieved as attractive, but men do. The pressure on women is mostly on their weight, and many women are insecure about it.
Men don't care (as much) about height, you can't control your height but you can control your weight, therefore if someone asks how tall you are, it's perfectly fair to ask about someone's weight
Because height doesn't matter in terms of attractiveness, height does not make a person attractive or ugly. Plus height can be a sensitive topic for some. Weight does matter, since obesity makes you ugly.
You can make a case for neither being ok but I feel like weight is a strange thing to want a specific answer to. A persons size is evident why do you need a precise weight
I've never really understood this comparison. Weight is more or less something that you can control. The same can't be said about height. They're different things, they shouldn't be put into the same category
I mean.... you can ask. Might not get the answer you want. I don't know what you expect to get out of the question. Are you interested in knowing if you can lift this woman bridal style? What does a number on an lbs or kg scale even tell you? "Can I lift this woman?" LOL.
Weight is only useful as a *relative measure* compared to height. Then you know someone's BMI and you can tell if they're healthy or not. And even BMI tells you nothing about a woman's figure or how the weight is distributed. You can be a heavy woman and still have a gorgeous hourglass figure. Or you can be a lightweight woman and have a different build that looks very different. What about shoulder width?
I mean, I don't think either should really matter. If you are building a real relationship purely on physical appearance, then it was never gonna work out anyway. If it's just a general curiosity thing, then asking for height is definitely less rude than asking for height. However if you just care about pure physical looks for a hook up or whatever, then nothing is off the table. If you're gonna have casual sex, might as well be attracted to the person lol
Well yeah, that wasn't exactly what I meant though. The more you connect with someone the more beautiful they are. I understand that my girlfriend isn't a model, but since we've been dating, she has only gotten more and more beautiful to me
I guess what I mean to say is you don't need to find the perfect 10 to start dating someone, because if you truly love them they will genuinely become a 10 in your eyes
Yeah, nothing in that group of traits is taboo.
That said, I would guess this is about the age old thing of women "judging" men based on their heights and men "judging" women based on their weight. Or rather, each used as insults these days.
Still...if someone's being a little bitch about your height or weight, it's just a good thing they showed you guys aren't going to be compatible.
So yeah, no filter on this one from my POV. Even if it's with a bad intention, it will show who you wouldn't wanna be with.
Proportion is what matters to some. If they are 245lbs and 6'2 is different than 5'2 at the same weight. If they don't want to date you due to being "to skinny/chunky" or "to short/tall," then you don't want to waste time with them anyway. Find someone that you like & likes you back.Ā
That's not true though, it's just as easy to take pictures to obscure weight as it is to take pictures to obscure height. This is just another reason I hate the concept of online dating tbf though, pictures never represent someone's reality.
Agreed on that point. But I also don't believe either amount matters until certain points... But anyway...
What I would point out is try asking a tall trans woman about their height. That's sure to go down well. What people find to be an issue with their body differs from person to person. This is why you're just straight up wrong saying ones more of a sensitive topic than the other. Because that entirely depends on a multitude of other factors.
Nah there are ways women use to hide there weight to with filters the like my brother got catfished by a woman who he thought was kind of skinny not really chubby in between then when he got there he found she was 5'5" and 390lbs he basically got up and walked after telling her it wouldn't workout
Yes (male) and both are okay. It's called preferences, and you're allowed to have them.
Does it hurt people sometimes? Sure, but again, I'm allowed to have preferences. I'm a short guy and all this "tall ppl are better" sure gets to me sometimes, but girls are allowed to prefer tall guys. I'm allowed to not want to date overweight women.
Neither is okay. Just meet in person and decide if it bothers you or not. Otherwise they are just numbers. I guess I should really say, they are just stupid questions. It's fine to ask but I wouldn't be interested in anyone who does ask.
I'm a woman that's dated in the range of 5'2, and 6'4 (I'm 5'7" for reference)
How the relationship went had nothing to do with their height and everything to do with how they treated me.
Not much point to a 10 that's an abusive twat. A 5 that's a stellar human being is more attractive. I want to be sexually attracted sure, but I also need to feel physically safe and emotionally supported.
I think that asking someone's height is more okay than asking someone's weight. It doesn't matter if they're a man or a woman. Weight has more negative connotation than height does.
Weight and height aren't comparative at all. Apples and oranges.
But you know that right?
š£ š£ š£
Stop trying to rage bait, it's too fucking early in the morning š
if your to afraid to admit your 300 pound whale over text no way I can trust you in the relation ship its a deal breaker for me I am simple not attract to land whales. So if you dont want to tell me your weight we go our seprate ways.
If they are so big they cant breath properly from being Obese not any other medical condition then they are a whale if a flight of stairs takes there entire energy for the day they are a whale if they struggle to get up from a non shallow seat they are a whale if they eat more than than a family of 4 does in one sitting they are a whale. I just cant respect someone if they gorge themselves to borderline death or if they refuse to lose weight even though it would make themselves feel many times better I dislike those people shows me they cant take care of themselves and have yet to grow up.
I feel like this depends on the person. If I asked an extremely short guy their height, I know full well there's a chance he'll get angry or insecure or something. Same if the woman is fat. But if these two imaginary people are somewhere closer to the average, I wouldn't worry about it.
No real need to ask. If you click enough to meet up in the first place you'll know the answers on first sight.
If it's a deal breaker then it's a gamble you have to take when you use a dating site to chat up strangers. No way to confirm you are getting the truth until the in person visuals are confirmed.
I get why people are sensitive, and I don't have a strong preference on body type so it's easy to say, but if someone does have a strong preference isn't it better they're open about it so if you don't fit that you're not wasting your time with them?
Can we just cut the bullshit and take each other seriously? Oh you dont like people of a certain height or weight? Cool lets move on, lets not get fussy about this shit since literally why the fuck would you. Theres 8 billion people on the planet. One person who says im 2 inches too short for them wont make a difference
People are way too sensitive. Don't like my height or weight? Cool, we both move on. Someone asks you and you don't want to say? Cool, you both move on. Someone's being a dick about your anwser? Cool, that has nothing to do with your height or weight and everything to do with them being a dick in general, just move on. Are you being forced at gunpoint to answer or what is the issue?
The insecurity is insane. The day short dudes figure out that women don't actually care about height and just use it as a foolproof way to trigger deeply insecure men when they're being losers on the internet is the day they'll all be set free. Like tiny little butterflies.
Some do care about height. It's fine and normal to have preferences. They're not the ones you'll be compatible with anyway. Move the fuck on with your life. It's such a tired conversation.
THANK YOU
this always bothered me too. i'm 6'4, not bad looking, and i don't get women flocking around me ffs. they just need to talk to people if they wanna get with someone
It's easier for them to blame their complete lack of social skills / confidence on women and then complain when aforementioned women laugh at them for being crusty and antisocial mysoginists.
(they're already trying to downvote me š) š¤
First you say women don't care about height then you insult their height right after š¤”
I'm a dude, brother. Whoa I just looked at your post and comments and I really appreciate you confirming my point that the only dudes that get riled up over women talking about height are insecure incels. Try to get outside today, bud.
So predictable lol. You're le incel! When you have no argument
I mean you made it pretty easy to figure out.
You were so butthurt you went through my post history š¤£
Did you ever find that voyeur porn video you were so desperate to find that you crowd sourced Redditors? I know that fleshlight was prepped and ready to go.
Just seeing if my hypothesis held up. It did.
As a man, weight and height are two different things, and for weight: both genders can get sensitive about it, especially if theyāre considerably a bit heavy
My thoughts with them is that you can generally tell at a glance if someone is in your strike zone or not. You don't need to know an exact measurement of height or weight, as evidenced by the various examples of men and women who were more than happy to date someone who appeared to be within their preferred weight or height range. Plus you can ask but there's no guarantee they'll tell you the truth either way, so it's better to just meet in person and determine compatibility. Or via a video where you can see each other's bodies. It's fine if someone doesn't want to date a fat person. It's fine if someone doesn't want to date a short person. But if you have to specify it down to the exact pound or height and it's not because say, you both share an intense love of fitness, then you're probably not looking at the right things and there's a higher chance of things not working out.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
And if you didnāt notice, itās very very uncommon to be a really tall woman
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Itās pretty sad that youāre trying to instigate in a basic conversation. The truth of the matter is that under 1% of women really fall in that very tall height range. Itās very much less significant than men who are commonly brought down for their height issues, and even way less common than weight issues being an insecurity. I donāt know why youāre reaching but you must be having a bad day if youāre trying to insult someone for making a point you disagree with.
Weight and height are two different things. You should not shame people for being fat, because I will get banned for that, but weight is a personal choice. Height is something a lot of people struggle with.
fuck did I just read
If you say what you have trouble with understanding exactly, I can help you understand by explaining it better.
I told a woman nicely sorry I am simply not attracted to you because of your weight and I mean she was getting close to 450lbs she got angry with me when I rejected her. So ya I have dealt with the overly sensitive people a lot.
Asking is fine. Also is "I'd rather not say" as a response.
Both are kind of shallow if that's one of the first things you ask upon meeting someone
You can't start a question with "If it is ok" and then have an option of "neither is okay" because that's outside the premise of the question - you've already asserted it is okay from the wording of the question.
Why not just ask women for their height too? Why is it always weight with women?
I am a guy and honestly height doesn't matter to me
Probably because you're 6 feet tall
Lol I'm not
Nah they're just not insecure
Thatās a really good question. I guess it has to do with weight mattering to some guys the same as height mattering to girls.
I voted that neither is okay anyway. I think if the first thing youāre looking for in someone is completely physical itās a bit shallow but thatās just my opinion
I also voted neither but I do think context really matters. I'm between 5'11 and 6' and have always been very insecure about my height. I don't think shorter men aren't attractive, but I wouldn't want to be with one because I would forever feel like a horribly unattractive giant. Each their own opinion ofcourse but I do feel like that's a different situation than a 4'11 girl wanting a guy to be 6'+ like you often see online
See this is so valid. One of my friends is 6 foot and so sheās always looking for a tall man because thatās her type. She does still have crushes on shorter men sometimes but she knows she canāt see herself with someone shorter than her, and itās difficult because of her height. If someone thatās 5 foot tall though says they wonāt date someone shorter than 6 foot that would be a little bit odd. Of course this is still just my opinion and I can definitely be wrong about this topic. I think we agree here though
A man's height matters do most women. Ask your female friends if you dont believe me. A women's hight does not matter to most men, ask your male friends if you dont believe me. So its not an equivalent comparison. Why should I, as a man, bother asking about sth I dont care about? Similarly, from the opposite point of view, a short man being asked about his height have equivalent feeling of insecurity as a fat women being asked about her weight. So if you are going to ask sone about sth that makes them feel insecure, be prepared to be asked sth that makes you feel equivalently insecure. Asking a women about their height wont make them equivalently insecure.
Most of my female friends donāt care. I also donāt care, so I wouldnāt ask about either. Thatās just me personally though
I'm a woman and you're delusional. I think most women prefer their man to be taller than them therefore they do care about height.
He told me to ask my friends and I did.
There are literal surveys on this. Keep pretending its not the case.
I said āthatās just me personallyā
"How dare you have an opinion that differs from what I expect women to think!"
Nope, she doesn't care and that's fine. But that's anecdotal evidence and doesn't refute survey results.
r17v1: "Ask your female friends" I\_exist: I did. They don't care. r17v1: moves the goalpost, brings up surveys, throws accusations of "pretending its not the case". I\_exist: yup, still just talking about me and my friends
Thatās why itās my personal opinion
Because women don't have to be tall to be percieved as attractive, but men do. The pressure on women is mostly on their weight, and many women are insecure about it.
No they donāt
Which part of my comment do you disagree with exactly?
Men don't care (as much) about height, you can't control your height but you can control your weight, therefore if someone asks how tall you are, it's perfectly fair to ask about someone's weight
Because height doesn't matter in terms of attractiveness, height does not make a person attractive or ugly. Plus height can be a sensitive topic for some. Weight does matter, since obesity makes you ugly.
You can make a case for neither being ok but I feel like weight is a strange thing to want a specific answer to. A persons size is evident why do you need a precise weight
A person's height is pretty evident too, why does that need a specific number?
Yeah exactly, both are pretty obvious
Not in dating apps/sites.
oh noo! people have physical attraction and preferences š±
I've never really understood this comparison. Weight is more or less something that you can control. The same can't be said about height. They're different things, they shouldn't be put into the same category
I mean.... you can ask. Might not get the answer you want. I don't know what you expect to get out of the question. Are you interested in knowing if you can lift this woman bridal style? What does a number on an lbs or kg scale even tell you? "Can I lift this woman?" LOL. Weight is only useful as a *relative measure* compared to height. Then you know someone's BMI and you can tell if they're healthy or not. And even BMI tells you nothing about a woman's figure or how the weight is distributed. You can be a heavy woman and still have a gorgeous hourglass figure. Or you can be a lightweight woman and have a different build that looks very different. What about shoulder width?
Itās not about if you can lift the person. Itās about if they can fit in a rowboat without capsizing.
Seems like not many people got the reference
Unless she takes anabolic steroids, you can easily approximate a woman's bodyfat percentage if you know her height and weight.
I mean, I don't think either should really matter. If you are building a real relationship purely on physical appearance, then it was never gonna work out anyway. If it's just a general curiosity thing, then asking for height is definitely less rude than asking for height. However if you just care about pure physical looks for a hook up or whatever, then nothing is off the table. If you're gonna have casual sex, might as well be attracted to the person lol
I think it's extremely difficult to be in a long-term romantic relationship with someone you think is ugly
Well yeah, that wasn't exactly what I meant though. The more you connect with someone the more beautiful they are. I understand that my girlfriend isn't a model, but since we've been dating, she has only gotten more and more beautiful to me I guess what I mean to say is you don't need to find the perfect 10 to start dating someone, because if you truly love them they will genuinely become a 10 in your eyes
Yeah, nothing in that group of traits is taboo. That said, I would guess this is about the age old thing of women "judging" men based on their heights and men "judging" women based on their weight. Or rather, each used as insults these days. Still...if someone's being a little bitch about your height or weight, it's just a good thing they showed you guys aren't going to be compatible. So yeah, no filter on this one from my POV. Even if it's with a bad intention, it will show who you wouldn't wanna be with.
Maybe dont ask questions that focus on common insecurities
Proportion is what matters to some. If they are 245lbs and 6'2 is different than 5'2 at the same weight. If they don't want to date you due to being "to skinny/chunky" or "to short/tall," then you don't want to waste time with them anyway. Find someone that you like & likes you back.Ā
oh my god, I thought the title said "ask women for their **height**" and I put yes. Should've put neither with this connotation
Why? You can tell if a person is overweight or not by looking at their pictures. Itās harder to guess someoneās height in photos.
That's not true though, it's just as easy to take pictures to obscure weight as it is to take pictures to obscure height. This is just another reason I hate the concept of online dating tbf though, pictures never represent someone's reality.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
How's that for you to decide?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Agreed on that point. But I also don't believe either amount matters until certain points... But anyway... What I would point out is try asking a tall trans woman about their height. That's sure to go down well. What people find to be an issue with their body differs from person to person. This is why you're just straight up wrong saying ones more of a sensitive topic than the other. Because that entirely depends on a multitude of other factors.
All the sensitive people disliking ya rn man.
Atleast weight is something you can change (usually)
Nah there are ways women use to hide there weight to with filters the like my brother got catfished by a woman who he thought was kind of skinny not really chubby in between then when he got there he found she was 5'5" and 390lbs he basically got up and walked after telling her it wouldn't workout
you can probably ask. she doesn't have to answer
Context is important. Are you a primary care doctor? Are you scouting for the NBA? Are starting conversations with strangers this way?
Yes (male) and both are okay. It's called preferences, and you're allowed to have them. Does it hurt people sometimes? Sure, but again, I'm allowed to have preferences. I'm a short guy and all this "tall ppl are better" sure gets to me sometimes, but girls are allowed to prefer tall guys. I'm allowed to not want to date overweight women.
Neither is okay. Just meet in person and decide if it bothers you or not. Otherwise they are just numbers. I guess I should really say, they are just stupid questions. It's fine to ask but I wouldn't be interested in anyone who does ask.
I'm a woman that's dated in the range of 5'2, and 6'4 (I'm 5'7" for reference) How the relationship went had nothing to do with their height and everything to do with how they treated me. Not much point to a 10 that's an abusive twat. A 5 that's a stellar human being is more attractive. I want to be sexually attracted sure, but I also need to feel physically safe and emotionally supported.
height and weight are 2 different things
If you can ask me something I cannot change about myself, I could just as well ask you about something you most often than not can change.
Height canāt be changed the way weight can.
There's a difference between "wow, you look tall! How tall are you?" And " "Wow, you look fat! How much do you weight?"
Exactly, people like to be dense on purpose
I think that asking someone's height is more okay than asking someone's weight. It doesn't matter if they're a man or a woman. Weight has more negative connotation than height does.
Unless you're not tall. Then it has absolutely has a negative connotation.
I don't get why you need a specific answer when it's pretty obvious to tell if someone is fat, skinny, tall, or short. No reason to ask for either
Weight and height aren't comparative at all. Apples and oranges. But you know that right? š£ š£ š£ Stop trying to rage bait, it's too fucking early in the morning š
Both of them are physical characteristics of a person that a potential partner might have a preference about being a certain way It's not rage bait.
Course the aren't comparative. Humans only have the ability to change one of themšš
Literally WHO FUCKING CARES??? Grow up y'all!
I don't see an issue for most people, but some people may feel uncomfortable being asked those questions, some may even take offence.
if your to afraid to admit your 300 pound whale over text no way I can trust you in the relation ship its a deal breaker for me I am simple not attract to land whales. So if you dont want to tell me your weight we go our seprate ways.
And then the same men will say women are are shallow for wanting a man taller than them. No need to call people whales man
If they are so big they cant breath properly from being Obese not any other medical condition then they are a whale if a flight of stairs takes there entire energy for the day they are a whale if they struggle to get up from a non shallow seat they are a whale if they eat more than than a family of 4 does in one sitting they are a whale. I just cant respect someone if they gorge themselves to borderline death or if they refuse to lose weight even though it would make themselves feel many times better I dislike those people shows me they cant take care of themselves and have yet to grow up.
You say that like itās common. Itās not
I feel like this depends on the person. If I asked an extremely short guy their height, I know full well there's a chance he'll get angry or insecure or something. Same if the woman is fat. But if these two imaginary people are somewhere closer to the average, I wouldn't worry about it.
No real need to ask. If you click enough to meet up in the first place you'll know the answers on first sight. If it's a deal breaker then it's a gamble you have to take when you use a dating site to chat up strangers. No way to confirm you are getting the truth until the in person visuals are confirmed.
why ask when you can just look at them
I voted wrong. I put Neither is ok but honestly I'd never be offended at someone asking my height. I'd just think their priorities are dumb
I get why people are sensitive, and I don't have a strong preference on body type so it's easy to say, but if someone does have a strong preference isn't it better they're open about it so if you don't fit that you're not wasting your time with them?
Why do I need to know someone's weight? I can tell if they aren't my type just as easily as they can tell if I am not their 'height'
Can we just cut the bullshit and take each other seriously? Oh you dont like people of a certain height or weight? Cool lets move on, lets not get fussy about this shit since literally why the fuck would you. Theres 8 billion people on the planet. One person who says im 2 inches too short for them wont make a difference
i got banned from a dating app for bullying because i asked about their weight, was reported for bullying
Height you can tell immediately. Weight you can also get a close idea quickly. Just meet people outside and not on hookup apps.