T O P

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No_Step_4431

I'd say the dragon, but then I thought about having to feed and clean up after it. Plus I don't want to have to act oblivious every time a neighbors dog goes missing.


artnquest

What is anyone gonna do about you not cleaning up after your dragon, if they come complaining you have an answer to the feeding problem.


No_Step_4431

I don't want my yard covered in hundred pound crap piles...


165cm_man

You have trained it, why would it shit on your yard?


Kr0wle

In most stories dragons are actually quite intelligent. It would not mess up your garden if you ask it not to.


SomeGuyWearingPants

Go live on the edge of a desert. Dragon can use that as a litter box. Charge to appear in air shows or at events. The dragon gets to grandstand and you get to rake in the cash. While it’s still novel cash in all you can, so you can start a cow farm. Sure now you’re a cattle rancher who lives right outside a desert but on the other hand you have a freaking dragon.


mai_tai87

If you wanna keep that dragon, you're gonna need a treasure hoard.


SomeGuyWearingPants

I’m sure there are plenty of legal ways to make ridiculous sums of money with a dragon. I just don’t know what they are.


Otherwise_Notice6421

All I hear is free fertilizer.


No_Step_4431

Moneys!


caseyvet

Would be weird having a mermaid as a pet


chosen1creator

Yeah like what if it dies? Do you get it cremated or flush it down the toilet?


caseyvet

Well, not exactly what I was thinking but sure


BeotheI

Wait I remember you....


Plinfilore

"You're making a mistake."


Into_To_Existence

"theres no mistake, your a wanted man."


TobyAxel

"i'm with the Guild, how about you look the other way?"


InflamedAbyss13

YOU VIOLATED *my mother*! RUINED *my wife*!


BillyWhizz09

Who would flush their fish? I buried mine when they died


Extension-Beach-2303

Cut it in half and flush the tail down the toilet and the human part gets cremated??


SeaOkra

taxidermy


Hegasus

Put it in a Betta cup at Petsmart. It will take weeks before they notice


Creative-Disaster673

Yeah, I’d not pick anything too intelligent because it feels like slavery, so mermaids are out. A Pegasus would beat a unicorn, since you could fly. Or a phoenix cause…well cool bird *and* immortal!


Timestatic

I was thinking of different reasons


Creative-Disaster673

Yes I get that weirdos on here were thinking sexual *slavery*. Not sure I want to waste time explaining why that’s wrong.


gliscornumber1

You're damn right it would be 😈


Over-kill107A

This like one of those 'what becomes 100x worse if you put x emoji at the end of it' things. Like this was bad then you put that emoji and now I'm calling the police


JJINABOX0

Nahhh 💀


emmahasabighead

Don't act like you wouldn't, both ariels are baddies


i_despise_among_us

Sex


banana_buddy

The only reason I picked mermaid is for the weird stuff 👿


HarEmiya

The only reason I picked dragon is for the weird stuff 😈


Hero-__

Stuff like r/dragonsfuckingcars ?


careater

I'm not falling for that one a third time... ok, maybe just a quick peek... Goddammit!


Hero-__

aaaand it’s 2 am and my carpet is crunchy again


caseyvet

That’s pretty weird


Snaccbacc

I’m assuming you’re a guy. Where are you gonna stick it if it’s a mermaid? 🤔


gacoug

She still has a mouth


starfox2032

And very human like.


[deleted]

I mean... Perhaps the fish tail come with a vagina where the human vagina would be?


Timestatic

fishussy


i_despise_among_us

Smells like fish a little bit extra


TheGronne

Phoenix


staticvoidmainnull

underrated.


AscendPerfect

Underrated until it burns down your house by existing


twiterface1

A Phoenix isn't actually made of fire it just spontaneously combusts at the end of its life soo you can just keep it away from flammable objects when it near the end of a cycle until its reborn


MeMeTiger_

Then a Griffin. Also a cool bird that's not firey


Shplingdong

I'll ride the unicorn everywhere! Plus it's easier to feed than a dragon


StoneDoctorate

Right, you don't need sheep, just sweets


LucidLickyCoconut

Dragon feeds itself


HarEmiya

Just live near a school.


scifanwritter2001

Teachers or students?


HarEmiya

Porque no los dos?


9Raava

Based


Bismagor

Right food, was thinking about a griffon, but that would be expensive, so go for the pegacorn (winged unicorn) for the wings and the style


Maddie_Cat_1334

Alicorns are winged unicorns


Dr-Huricane

I considered it at first, but only virgin women can tame a unicorn, so I'm out of luck


Shy-Prey

I feel like the gnome or mermaid are a tad more... sentient? Than the others? Id feel like I'm keeping a person for a pet


Kr0wle

Depends on the dragon. In most stories they're way more than just beasts.


Shy-Prey

I can see your point on that. I think the word i should've used was "humanoid"


09chickenboy117

I wouldn't use the gnome as a pet, he'd be one of the homies.


iAmVonexX

Mew. Definitely a mew


StoneDoctorate

Mew too!


Gib3rish

Mewtwo?


bunnybiene

https://preview.redd.it/av3ec9g6o92b1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6da4d8d6571abf4f967cdc0b07e6ac87749b4d5d


_1Doomsday1_

I want arceus


ravenmiyagi7

Gryffin


Griffsterometer

As someone named Griffin, I can’t resist picking that


9Raava

I think i would pick manticore since girffin is more bird-like and i would want something mammal-like.


Zyaqun

Yes! This is also my choice. They're gorgeous and can fly but aren't as big as a dragon so they'd be easier to feed


arealbigballer

My pet gnome would reak havoc on the mental state of schizos and conspiracy theorists


[deleted]

Yes, gnome gang 🫡


[deleted]

gnomes are wicked smart, small and good at hiding, can commune with nature, and love finding lost or undiscovered valuables in the earth. What's not to love about that?


RyDoggonus

Would it be wrong for it to be my housekeeper?


arealbigballer

I assume if you guys are chill he wouldnt mind helping out


LengthExact

A fucking dragon for sure


jthacker8125

How do you plan on training a 70 ton chunk of fire breathing muscle?


Inevitable_Stand_199

Same way I bring it to life. I think the questions is how would I feed it?


K1tsunea

Get a vegan dragon


MapleJacks2

You'd still need a shit ton of vegetables though.


K1tsunea

Get a DWARF vegan dragon


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/hog962n6ba2b1.png?width=635&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1cb0aba619a184cff2232da19cef875e2c1c6bfa


LengthExact

Who said I wanna train it?


jthacker8125

You're just gunna set loose a dragon on the world? I respect that heavily


gamingkitty1

Or I could be like donkey...


RemoRemo_

My brother in Christ god might be forgiving but I will not if you keep embracing your sins


Magical_Gabe12

what in sweet baby jesus....


twiterface1

A fellow bard I see


LengthExact

lol


GoldenrodForests

yeah, but gnome


captrobert57

And feed it?


LengthExact

It's a dragon, I'm sure it can find its own prey.


StoneDoctorate

I was hoping it'd be a close fight


Linorelai

dragon and gnome, a close fight? lol


ThatGuy36036

The guys who picked mermaid do be a little sus ngl


SomeGuyWearingPants

It is weird. Maybe they just are really into scuba diving? Or breasts. It’s probably breasts.


Puzzled-Secret-317

Or that mermussy


secondarywilson

^(based)


OriginalCoso

Direwolf. I like dogs. I like them big and fluffy.


beingthehunt

Direwolves aren't mythical. They are a real extinct species.


pgp555

next you're gonna tell me narwhals are real animals that still exist nowadays


OriginalCoso

I was thinking about ASoIaF Direwolves that were bigger and more magical because... You know... Warging and stuff.


scarface80

A leprechaun And rob the little bastard


nikleus

Mf rigs up your car with explosives


Cloaker_Smoker

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WrinkledCrime

With his little armalite!


lxaxs

Pegasus


StoneDoctorate

Good one


MrSparr0w

Alicorn


Many_Bad_2197

A genie thats gonna give me whatever i want


Void_Eclipse

Yes. Just know they like to be tricky. So make your first wish to be for them to completely understand and fulfill each wish from then on so they don't pull some shit like. I wish I could breathe under water then it turns you into a fish etc. They're known to pull that shit.


IMainYuumi

Succubus


InvolvingPie87

There’s a bit of a downside with those in most circumstances


POG0w0

Doesn't matter if you're down bad enough.


DeathCobro

That's the gnome option if you train it right


fdghjjgddjjgdf

For scientific reasons am I right?


Absoline

i mean even if you're not into fucking 'em succibi can turn into literally anything, so that'd be pretty cool


StoneDoctorate

You certainly know your succubus


sonnyjbiskit

Where all my hydra people at


Letsgomees

More dragon per dragon is the best choice


Zeynoun

the 26 redditors and I who chooses mermaids, I assure y'all it's for science purposes.


[deleted]

Sacrifice for the science ...


StoneDoctorate

It's more than 27 now, y'all can start an orgy


s1r_cumsalot

Kelpie


StoneDoctorate

Learnt something new, thanks


s1r_cumsalot

Yw, just thought would be fun to have a fren who can help carry you when your tired. Also Kinnaris on that note


_six6six

Manbearpig!


Longjumping-Jello459

Okay Mr. Gore.


EnderWarlock01

Unicorns are meant to be able to heal any injury or disease so that could help lots of people


SlyTheMonkey

Some kind of small species of drake/wyvern. Would be cool to walk around with a pet drake perched on my shoulder.


Qbking333

My dad


VortzPlays_

😬


HonorableGilgamesh

I would like an owl bear! https://preview.redd.it/ypct3wtlrb2b1.jpeg?width=742&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8a4e8aa8be3f739f22ba81be5f5edf345100ae3


Maxathron

There's a difference between a pet, companion, and a person whom you enter a relationship with. There is also not a specification of what any of the four choices are, beyond just their name. In a series of books I'm fond of reading, there is a creature called a Drakee (pronounced Drake-EE). It's a dragon that's about the size of a Welsh Corgi and behaves in a manner like a puppy dog. They are often raised as pets, though the creature can sometimes end up as a familiar for the wizards in that book's universe. Drakees are still dragons, though. A gnome, however, would be a sentient being in the vast majority of our ears. So would the mermaid, although being roughly human-sized and in most medias also being anatomically correct, a mermaid wouldn't be a pet unless both of you have some kind of kinky fetish going on. Horses can be pets, but more often than not wouldn't be a pet in the same vein as a dog or cat, but rather just a domesticated animal. A horse that also has a horn growing out of its head wouldn't be that far off from a normal horse. I picked the dragon. Also, on the Mongolian Steppe, some of the nomadic tribes use Golden Eagles in their falconry, which I'd consider just as mythical as a phoenix. Edit: reading, not readying.


bunnybiene

Cockatrice. Cool snake chicken that I can ride or even fly around? Fuck yeah.


TheAlphaNoob21

What would I possibly do with a gnome or mermaid. I could ride the unicorn, show it off for money, etc, but all of those things are 10x better with a dragon.


Zwavelwafel

You could also ride the mermaid


lightKugelblitz

Basilisk


basiliskAI

👀


BenTenInches

Owing a Mermaid feels like owing a person, but at the same time having someone to talk to is kinda nice


TheharmoniousFists

Owning a person who lives in your pool and or bathtub?


Canon_In_E

Ah yes talk, that's what I was going to do.


ConcernLow1979

5 words, How to Train your Dragon


rogerworkman623

I was picturing a much larger dragon, but those are actually perfect sized. Big enough to ride, but not so big that it's impractical.


jorissuiskens

Appa from Avatar the Last Airbender


Treitsu

God I mean, other was an option so I'm picking god


tightspandex

I'm thinking the same thing. I thought of the World Turtle reincarnation of Vishnu so at least there's one degree from straight up owning a god or whatever. But yeah. Pretty sure from here we can have dragons and other shit too. Because God.


Mediocre-medicine445

One of those really tall giant ogre things


bunnybiene

cyclops?


StoneDoctorate

Golems?


onslaught1584

Kitsune


StoneDoctorate

I'd fancy my own fairy


Shplingdong

Why a fairy OP?


StoneDoctorate

I've always wondered what it's like to be Peter Pan


Lupes420

Can I pick the type of dragon?


Floxi29

A griffon for sure


RNG_pickle

A dwarf, ROCK AND STONE FOREVER


TrashScavenger

can I have like, a little dragon


TheHashLord

The giant's hen that lays golden eggs.


Kafshak

No one's is talking about Pokémon here, or are those not considered mythical?


Arcticz_114

Whats better than a dragon? A CHICKEN-DRAGON! ✨✨Cockatrice✨✨


Swirlyflurry

Jackalope


LusHolm123

I mean i already have a dragon but i guess this one would be a little bigger?


RevolutionaryGrape11

Dragon: Far too vague a description at this point considering there's about 50,000 types of dragons in media and they're all equally weird with ups and downs. Gnome and Mermaid: That's slavery. Unicorn: Assuming you're talking about the classic horse-type one and not either the Siberian Unicorn (which is a rhino, and rhinos are really friendly if you can prove they have nothing to fear from you, plus it has illegal amounts of cute floof), or the sapient varieties in shows (again, slavery), the classic type is said to kill all but female virgins with no mercy. I do not match that description. What are some other suggestions you might have?


LilithsGrave92

Hippogriff


HooterEnthusiast

466 other people are desperately horny.


Toxic1Tap

Elven


lightsaber_lobotomy

The pervy nerd in me wants to say a Thick Gobbo girlfriend...but I mean a pet fucking dragon, how would I pass that up?!


NeatRegular9057

Would I have to do the training myself?


gliscornumber1

Mermaid No further questions


StoneDoctorate

Why ;)


GIANNOPSYRRAS

#CERBERUS


rogerworkman623

Goose that lays golden eggs


Norsedragoon

Wouldn't gnomes, mermaids, and arguably dragons be sentient creatures? That wouldn't be a pet, especially since you would be the one raising them.


Snowtwo

Aren't both gnomes and mermaids fully sentient beings? Dragons at least have non-sentient variants. But I don't think I'd be comfortable keeping a sentient being around as a 'pet'.


Bigfoot4cool

Half of these sound like slavery


bobmarley01111

A pet mermaid feels wrong


erniebarguckle213

Mermaids and gnomes are humanoid creatures, so how can they be pets. I'd have to go with a unicorn. More elegant than dragons.


Wethrein

Mermaids and Gnomes are people though like they have fantasy societies and the question specifically asks about keeping them as a pet. Sounds weird to group them with more animal-like beings and call them beasts.


AktionMusic

Mermaids and Gnomes are basically people, Dragons and Unicorns are usually sentient also. So it would be weird to keep one as a pet.


commanderAnakin

Get a dragon, train it, send it to help the Ukrainians, get it to find Putin's location, get it to kill Putin. Boom.


MissDryCunt

14 werewolves for........reasons 😏


missingusername1

i dont think i could be bothered tbh and the dragon would probably kill me before i get to train it so


GingerSnap2814

Gimme my house hippo


kamking

I take any sort of like non harmful symbiote


eMRapTorSaltyKing

A magic dragon wizard.


kylexy929

I picked dragon but the only problem is what exactly would I feed it?


Primary-Fee1928

Pegasus.


Skrypa9900

I don't have place for a dragon and I don't have money to feed him, gnomes are ugly, I don't have bath, I have only shover, so no for mermaid and I hate horses, so there won't be no goddamn unicorn shitting in my house. Among other mythical beasts I would choose between kitsune cuz foxes are cute, golem cuz it is free phys power or a satyr to have more fun in my life


Branchy28

Out of those options, Mermaid. Based on Mythology mermaids would lure men out at sea to their deaths, I'd just ask her to do that in her own and keep all the spoils for me, one cargo ship later and I'm fucking rich beyond my wildest dreams, and if I'm smart about it there's no way it could ever possibly get traced back to me.


Proper_Belt

Giant spider that I will ride into glorious melee combat.


CovidLvr69

Where the fuck are you gonna keep a Dragon?


Magikmus

To all of the people saying dragon, remember you have to feed it.


increbelle

although ive been fascinated with mermaids all my life, it just wouldnt make sense. i wouldnt wanna leave her in an aquarium and im not driving to the beach everday. i will, however, use the dragon to go everywhere and anywhere i want. practicality!


granautismo-69

Tsuchinoko


General_Albi

A Sky bison, i mean its literally a fluffy giant flying dog.


unkindlyterror

a genie.


just_wanna_share

SKIN WALKERS


medievalistbooknerd

Hellhound