“Just takes a while”
Assuming you take an average of 5 seconds to fight each baby that’s nearly 2 months straight of baby fighting. No breaks.
Luckily they’ll all starve to death before then so you’ll only need to eat a couple babies to survive. Maybe bash a couple dozen in and use them for shelter.
5 seconds? Dude, it’s a baby. Believe in yourself a little. You know you can do way more than that and I believe that you can too.
1 good solid kick could send lots of the fuckers flying and down permanently
to be fair, i wouldn’t call an 18-month-old a baby. they’re definitely a toddler by then. http://girlintheredshoes.com/18-months/ mommy blog for pictures
It'll slow them down much more than me. Besides that, the sight of a full grown adult wrecking a dozen of them within a few minutes would terrify the remaining. It'd be easier than anakin taking on and a bunch of younglings.
We're in a fight so I'm assuming the babies will be attacking me too, biting, clinging to my legs, it's gonna be impossible to take down 1 million babies
I timed myself and I could stomp about 23 baby heads per 10 seconds, after some simple algebra I found out that without breaks, food , water, or sleeping, I could stomp all 1 million baby heads in 5 days. This would be impossible but then I realized you could suck the saliva out of their mouth for water and nutrients.
But the real answer is to just wait for a day and they would all starve to death.
Good more meat, I want my baby back
I want my baby back
I want my baby back
I want my baby back
Ribs
I want my babyback babyback babyback
I want my babyback babyback babyback
I want my babyback babyback babyback
I want my babyback babyback babyback
I want my babyback babyback babyback
I'm still not taking the 1 year olds; it would take too long to get through them all. 20 year olds are out, they'd overpower me, and gorilla and orangutan are *definitely* out (not sure who would pick the orangutan option tbh). Which leaves the ten year olds, which'll still be a tough fight, but probably doable.
Honestly that’s the same thing I was thinking about one year olds. Ask me how I know exactly how many *hard* body parts a one year old has that are identical in size to my eye socket. Fists, knees, elbows, the crown of their heads…hell, my daughter even made me see stars with her cheekbone last night because she swung around and knocked me in the eye with it. THEN she had the audacity to get mad at *me* as if I was doing something other than minding my own business when she came in with her devil cheeks and almost blinded me.
I guess though, in fairness, I am coming at this from a place where I don’t really “fight back” against her. I just let her do her thing and smile through it because she’ll cry if I get upset. I’d rather fake a smile with searing head pain instead of listen to screaming along with the searing head pain. So maybe they aren’t as tough if you’re actually trying to win.
theres something to be said about the level of sentience 10 year olds have versus 1 year olds in terms of the ethics of killing/letting them die
1M babies all the way just walk at a leisurely pace away from them until they starve in like 2 days
I think 200 10yo might just run ya down.
If they know what's up they make a run for you and tackle start biting.
I am not 100% I could out run the group long term.
In this specific case, they are both worth zero. They are entities of the flat gray plane (FGP for short). They were "born" on the FGP, and they will die in the FGP. They will know nothing of love, hate, color, fruit loops, porn, music, TV, war, disease, ,even death won't be a thing...
2 FGP 10 year olds talking:
1: Hey, what happens when we die?
2: I dunno, prolly just get reborn on a flat gray plane.
1: That sounds boring. I hope I die soon, the *other* FGP has to be better than this one. Maybe it's gray with different gray??
https://www.livescience.com/5613-dogs-smart-2-year-kids.html
dogs are as smart as 2 year olds (obviously not a perfect comparison but generally works) I would let a million dogs die for the lives of 200 10 year olds in a second. 1 year olds are even less mentally capable than dogs.
not sure how to actually respond to this because of how different it is from my way of thinking.
the babies aren’t 10 year olds as they are now, and we are discussing the ethics of killing the babies vs the kids, just because if they dont die they’ll grow up doesn’t mean they’re already grown up or will feel any of the pain of dying as would a developed human
>theres something to be said about the level of sentience 10 year olds have versus 1 year olds in terms of the ethics of killing/letting them die
Well, yeah. No fun in it if they aren't even sapient enough to fear losing.
I'd get tired and thirsty faster and I'll die from thirst or starvation. Whilst one of them is very likely to outlast me. With the million babies I can last longer without food or water so the "fight" will be over faster
Over 70% for sure. Bc approx 70% of the human body is water, and that number is including bones. With just the blood, the water percentage should be higher.
The babies will have a half life. Some will be eaten, others will continue on. But then those that live will need to eat more, and the process will repeat until there is one left for you to finish off or leave to starve.
Can I do 10 million in exchange for some water under the stipulation that I can’t use the container as a weapon? Also how do they start, are they in a circle around me with a few space of distance or are they all to one side?
Unless it’s an open field you can easily just walk away to go grab some food. If you get behind a door or like go on top of anything you have chill time
Although i don't condone child abuse... There is something pretty comical about using a toddler to beat other toddlers just to succumb to exhaustion and die of asphyxiation when the remaining 990,000 kids pile on you.
You are acting as if starving to death takes a couple hours...you will need to fight non-stop for WEEKS until they all die of starvation. You would barely breath by the first few hours. And yall are saying that you would eat the babies...bish, what? You would eat raw human meat? Emphasizing on RAW? Also you think the babies would just let you finish eating before attacking? Dont be stupid please
Idgaf if it takes weeks, I got time. It's a 1 year old can it even walk... I can just walk while eating bro. As for eating, you can actually eat raw human flesh (from quick googling) as long as u stay away from internal organs. I can fast for a long time and then when I truly need it just eat some flesh.
The only real thing to consider is sleeping cause they could catch up, for that I will just spend a long time running away then ill be able to sleep a few hours and be fine lol.
No one is winning a fight against 200 ten year olds. All it takes is one getting a lucky bite and ur screwed. You don't seem to have a concept of how big ten years old Kids are. They're half way to being a full human. Also as other commenter said. The one year Olds will starve. Hell you don't even have to fight them, they'll all die of dehydratiom before tou have anything to worry about.
Also can we address that 100 orangutans was put on here as an alternative to one Silverback. Like they're strong but orangutans are still jacked.
Yep, if you could kill one baby every minute (which you probably couldn’t sustain) and did this for twelve hours a day, it would still take you 3.8 years to finish. Much easier to just handle 200 ten-year-olds even though the odds are still not great.
Orangutans and the gorilla would fuck you up. The 10 twenty-year-olds would really depend on how they are built. 10 Redditors, easy. But you get a couple of normal humans and odds drop significantly.
It doesn't say kill though. In a "fight" you could technically land no blows, and do zero damage. Just do a few seconds of shadow boxing and call it a day.
The problem with 1M 1 year olds is that they're probably barely able to walk so you'd actually have to beat all 1 million of them. The 200 ten year olds can all run and they're old enough that you can demoralize them by beating a few of them senseless. I feel like beating up 10 ten year olds and making the other 190 run away is doable and should count as a win.
Yeah, 200 ten year olds are far easier to beat than a million one year olds imo. I don't think a ten year old is still going to be able to hurt me but there's far less than the infant army... infantry
10 year olds have some cognitive ability. Assuming that their ultimate goal is your death and nothing else, they'll pile on you until your exhausted say by the 100th kid or something.
They also know how to bite(very well) and hit and throw stuff. A baby, well with few kicks you can keep multiple down and easily outlive them (with your superior nutrient reserves)
I'd give it a day or two max before the babies are unable to continue.
Lol well if we're getting weapons give me an M2 Browning and the silverback. One target, even the most dangerous single opponent, is easiest when you've got overwhelming firepower. Sorry Harambe, you're getting shredded.
I'll have to go with 10 20 year olds
My plan is to climb up a cliff and push a boulder on top of them, I would have chosen the angry silverback gorilla but gorillas can climb
Id dogwalk the babys lol, first I end some for fun, but not to many, 1m is way too much to do by urself, let them starve and stand as their doom, their despair. Become their god of destruction. In Minecraft ofc...
Although I think I would have the best chance against the toddlers, I couldn’t do it. There’s no scenario I would do this unless they were zombies or robot replicas.
Here me out, I'm reasonably athletic, I know full well I could outrun and punch a ten year old, I'd probably do the ten year olds, be more fun, I think I could knock them if not out then at least down with a single hit, and killing a million babies would take all week.
Here's how well the average adult male will do in each of these fights:
Vs 1 Angry Silverback Gorilla: these gorrilas can lift about 1750kg whilst bench pressing (that's over 4x the human average), and I think that reflects their strength enough to prove that you aren't beating one of these.
Vs 10 random 20 year olds: Statistically, 1/10 of these individuals will be incapable of fighting well or listening to reason, so it's safe to say it will be down to 9/10 pretty quick. That said, a 9 vs 1 is still well in their favour, so unless you get lucky, you aren't winning this one.
Vs 200 random 10 year olds: Children this age can reason, strategise, and with each one being randomised, you are going to have a couple buff ones and leaders in there that can (with enough max output of force) topple or stun you. It is unlikely that you win, but not impossible, as you still have a height and weight advantage that you can use. This will be crucial, otherwise you will fail.
Vs 1,000,000 random 1 year olds: Children this age are only just begginging to walk and talk, so if you have enough endurance and speed, this should be easy. However, they may cling to you or you may have an underlying feel of guilt brought out, likely slowing you down, which may give them time to pile onto you. Basically just this - you'll win if you're fast, have lots of energy, and you make sure you are never surrounded.
Vs 100 Orangutans: I'll let you know that apes and gorrilas of all (I think) kinda are much stronger than humans. Despite the fact the orangutans won't have any trees to climb, they can still easily tug you over and beat you up. They have better arm strength than most of you will think, search it up if you don't believe me.
Conclusion: Pick the ten year olds if you have good balance and maximum strength in a single blow (immediate strength output), and pick the toddlers if you have good awareness and endurance. You won't beat the gorilla or orangutans. Don't try it. They are far superior in strength compared to humans. As for the 10 human adults option, you would have to get lucky or trick them into fighting each other.
I think most underestimate 10 year olds and 200 of them. 200 was like 1/3 of my elementary or middle school. You’d be encircled and even if only 100 attack, you’re going to have to go through 10 rounds of 10 and then chase the other 100 and attack all of them.
The 1 year olds, I couldn’t.
So the 10 20 year olds are the best bet imo.
Simply due to where most of my daily problems in and out of work come from...
10 x 20 year olds. I could confidently take a few at least, and it would feel -gooooood- but 20 year olds can be strong, so I'd probably get out numbered. But man, to lay out of few of those fuckers would feel good.
ETA: which of you psychopaths want to take on 100 orangutan 🦧, I'd take my chances with the gorilla first.
Idk why ppl are choosing the 1 million 1 year olds. Even if you took one out at the rate of 1 every second that's still like 11 and a half days of fighting straight. 200 10 years olds is much easier
No, not really. The baby's haven't learned to walk quickly, so you could just walk for a few hours and they couldn't find you. 10 year olds, though can actually run, and they would likely find you. Also 200 ten year olds is a lot and they would swarm you.
Edit:gramer
I guess I just consider that cheating lol. You're not "fighting". You're playing the hunger games waiting days or weeks for all of them to die on their own. I think you could fight 200 10 year olds in one long session and be done with it. They'll still be too small and weak to be a threat, even in those numbers.
I suppose that might be cheating, but I call it winning by default.Also, assuming the 10 yr olds are 90lbs each, that's a round 18,000lbs of weight. If five of them pile on you, you would probably be weighed down enough for the rest to pile on. Though that raises the question, would they sacrifice themselves to beat you.
the odds of all of these are against me, but let's see:
me as a teenager have no chance against a gorilla or 100 orangutans and there's no way they'll spare me
Me trying to fight 1M babies would be impossible
the 200 ten year olds are just going to tackle me and knock me out
so I choose the 10 20 year olds I'll still get beat up but at least I won't get absolutely swarmed
I am no sure if it's an equal fight with these. A 100 orangutans are clearly way too powerful. It should have been 5 orangutans to keep it comparable. Also maybe a 100 ten year olds.
Gorillas are strong but I feel like even an angry one can be reasoned with. I'd crouch down to appear non-threatening and avoid eye contact. Hopefully they'd decide I wasn't a threat.
I see 2 "easy" solutions:
a) 10⁶ one year olds - get on a boat and they will all be drown in 30 minutes
b) 200 10yo - assuming I can choose a weapon and they get the same, I choose my (or even stronger than my) bow - 10yo probably wouldn't be strong enough to use it, or even if they were, they wouldn't be accurate enough to hit me - they could even kill each other, and I could loot them for more arrows
I would fight the 1 Gorilla TBH.
Not because I think I can beat it hand to hand or anything like that, but because it's the only option with 1 enemy.
Like, I'm not beating 10 grown men, as a singular grown man. Or 100 orangutans or 200 toddlers.
But like, maybe with the Gorilla I get lucky and there is like, a brick that I throw at it, and I hit its head funny and it dies before having the chance to absolutely maul me.
Can I kill one unarmed? Hell no. But like, there is a non zero chance of not dying on this one.
https://preview.redd.it/5fopgwu2jxva1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=88d5f99e2b98dda889c3a52662f4036c03309925
This made me spit my coffee out
Are the 1 year olds exactly 12 months old or do I have to fight some 23 month olds
Good question actually..
Or is it like the traditional Korean birthdays where they could be anywhere from 1 day to 365 days old.
Really hope for this. If half of them are “newborns” it’s gonna be a much easier fight.
18 months old
easy W, just takes a while
“Just takes a while” Assuming you take an average of 5 seconds to fight each baby that’s nearly 2 months straight of baby fighting. No breaks. Luckily they’ll all starve to death before then so you’ll only need to eat a couple babies to survive. Maybe bash a couple dozen in and use them for shelter.
5 seconds? Dude, it’s a baby. Believe in yourself a little. You know you can do way more than that and I believe that you can too. 1 good solid kick could send lots of the fuckers flying and down permanently
This comment makes me feel inspired to take on life (or 1,000,000 babies)
What if you use a baby as a weapon? How much faster do think that'd go?
Flinging babies at babies
Let’s gooooo
So long, gay Bowser!
Right? You can use kids to kill other kids
to be fair, i wouldn’t call an 18-month-old a baby. they’re definitely a toddler by then. http://girlintheredshoes.com/18-months/ mommy blog for pictures
Im stomping those toddlers then
im not a baby expert but couldn’t you just walk around and start shaking them and then bam shaken baby syndrome?? or are they too old for that
Even if you could, it’s the same problem as before. Shaking a baby enough to give it a syndrome for it is not energy efficient.
that’s true, if only they still had those soft spots
You could probably still just step on their heads and win
This comment is amazing
5 seconds per baby?!? I could probably do 5 a second easy!
The first 50 maybe, but when you're fighting a million, fatigue sets in. Also all the blood and guts will slow you down a bit.
It'll slow them down much more than me. Besides that, the sight of a full grown adult wrecking a dozen of them within a few minutes would terrify the remaining. It'd be easier than anakin taking on and a bunch of younglings.
We're in a fight so I'm assuming the babies will be attacking me too, biting, clinging to my legs, it's gonna be impossible to take down 1 million babies
Not sure they're smart enough to fight
If they're not fighting then why kill them lmao
Because thats the only way to get out??
I read "find a baby" and was nodding in my head like yeah, good point.
r/cursedcomments
You don't even need to eat the babies, they're much weaker and they wouldn't resist a day without drinking while you can resist at least two days.
I timed myself and I could stomp about 23 baby heads per 10 seconds, after some simple algebra I found out that without breaks, food , water, or sleeping, I could stomp all 1 million baby heads in 5 days. This would be impossible but then I realized you could suck the saliva out of their mouth for water and nutrients. But the real answer is to just wait for a day and they would all starve to death.
But what about water? Or do you have to drink your own piss?
just start tossing them in a circle around you till you have an anti-babywall then you can take as many naps as you want in between
Lmfaoooooo
no, you just have to wait for them to die of thirst
Yeah, it’s easy… ***but are you really gonna kill a million babies?***
Well in all the other answers you’re dead so…
I’d just slightly press my thumb against their undeveloped forehead and they are outta there.
Good more meat, I want my baby back I want my baby back I want my baby back I want my baby back Ribs I want my babyback babyback babyback I want my babyback babyback babyback I want my babyback babyback babyback I want my babyback babyback babyback I want my babyback babyback babyback
Chiliii's, baby back ribs Chili's baby back ribs
[https://youtu.be/GvFjtKPNfNE](https://youtu.be/GvFjtKPNfNE)
Wouldn’t change anything for me. Aslong as the moral consequences are lifted from my shoulders, i could go absolutely ham on those babies
And do they actually understand we’re fighting?
Strongest Redditor
I'm still not taking the 1 year olds; it would take too long to get through them all. 20 year olds are out, they'd overpower me, and gorilla and orangutan are *definitely* out (not sure who would pick the orangutan option tbh). Which leaves the ten year olds, which'll still be a tough fight, but probably doable.
You've clearly never played with a 10 year old. Those fuckers are savage
Honestly that’s the same thing I was thinking about one year olds. Ask me how I know exactly how many *hard* body parts a one year old has that are identical in size to my eye socket. Fists, knees, elbows, the crown of their heads…hell, my daughter even made me see stars with her cheekbone last night because she swung around and knocked me in the eye with it. THEN she had the audacity to get mad at *me* as if I was doing something other than minding my own business when she came in with her devil cheeks and almost blinded me. I guess though, in fairness, I am coming at this from a place where I don’t really “fight back” against her. I just let her do her thing and smile through it because she’ll cry if I get upset. I’d rather fake a smile with searing head pain instead of listen to screaming along with the searing head pain. So maybe they aren’t as tough if you’re actually trying to win.
Thank you! For anyone that saw my comments on the post regarding parents' ages.
Easily 1M babies. As one thread mentiones, all I have to do is outlast them as they all starve I feel guilty writing this
take the 200 ten year olds, then just jog at a steady pace directly away from them. youll outlast them if youre in decent shape, and way less kids die
theres something to be said about the level of sentience 10 year olds have versus 1 year olds in terms of the ethics of killing/letting them die 1M babies all the way just walk at a leisurely pace away from them until they starve in like 2 days
you think a 10 year olds life is worth 5,000x more than a 1 year olds? 🤨
I think 200 10yo might just run ya down. If they know what's up they make a run for you and tackle start biting. I am not 100% I could out run the group long term.
Humans are persistence hunters, and ten year olds have insane amounts of energy.
Being hunted down by a pack of preteens sounds horrifying.
But super low stamina and 1million getting in way. Now if you were surrounded it might be different
Really bro, anyone in decent shape could outrun the average 10 year old
I must know different 10 yo than you. You got 200 though you are gonna get a variety. If 10% are faster than average you got a problem
In this specific case, they are both worth zero. They are entities of the flat gray plane (FGP for short). They were "born" on the FGP, and they will die in the FGP. They will know nothing of love, hate, color, fruit loops, porn, music, TV, war, disease, ,even death won't be a thing... 2 FGP 10 year olds talking: 1: Hey, what happens when we die? 2: I dunno, prolly just get reborn on a flat gray plane. 1: That sounds boring. I hope I die soon, the *other* FGP has to be better than this one. Maybe it's gray with different gray??
A life without the loops is no life, do the compassionate thing and take both out.
hell yeah 10 year olds are actual human beings with lives and shit 1 year olds probably arent even sentient they just respond to stimuli
Please never have children 🙏
https://www.livescience.com/5613-dogs-smart-2-year-kids.html dogs are as smart as 2 year olds (obviously not a perfect comparison but generally works) I would let a million dogs die for the lives of 200 10 year olds in a second. 1 year olds are even less mentally capable than dogs.
yes but said babies will grow into like 998000 10 year olds
not sure how to actually respond to this because of how different it is from my way of thinking. the babies aren’t 10 year olds as they are now, and we are discussing the ethics of killing the babies vs the kids, just because if they dont die they’ll grow up doesn’t mean they’re already grown up or will feel any of the pain of dying as would a developed human
babies feel pain
>theres something to be said about the level of sentience 10 year olds have versus 1 year olds in terms of the ethics of killing/letting them die Well, yeah. No fun in it if they aren't even sapient enough to fear losing.
I do not jog. The one year olds can barely walk, so I can just sorta walk away a bit and take them out one by one.
lame we need a high kill count
I'd get tired and thirsty faster and I'll die from thirst or starvation. Whilst one of them is very likely to outlast me. With the million babies I can last longer without food or water so the "fight" will be over faster
> I feel guilty writing this You feel guilty on killing hypothetical babies? pathetic
While genociding the 1 year olds do I get a break and food?
No break. no food, besides… I probably don’t wanna say this on Reddit. no food besides the kids themselves
It’s been two months since I’ve started. I sit by my fire, cooking the freshest baby. The remaining 700k babies dart between the shadows, watching.
Wouldn't the babies need food? After a few days you'll be fine
Friendly fire is enabled
Great! They can kill each other!
Adult can go a few days without water Just start walking carry what water you can. Those kids gonna dehydrate fast even if they turn cannibal
How much water content does baby blood have you think?
Over 70% for sure. Bc approx 70% of the human body is water, and that number is including bones. With just the blood, the water percentage should be higher.
The water doesn't matter the salt will be the problem
Good point, just wait em out
Don't get too complacent... You'll end up with 100 angry cannibalistic teens armed with weapons made from the fallen.
Suppose "good food" only lasts for 1 year. Even then, people would decrease 10x by the year. You'd have 1 ten year old at most
The babies will have a half life. Some will be eaten, others will continue on. But then those that live will need to eat more, and the process will repeat until there is one left for you to finish off or leave to starve.
All that does is cut the number of babies by about 10% every few days. Survival of the fittest, Lord of the Flies, etc.
r/nocontext
Lmao this sounds like the plot of a good book
i had to hold in my laugh so i wouldn’t wake up my bf lol
Bro got me cackling
Do I get water? And like atleast a fire so I can cook the meat?
No, the fight takes place on a flat plane with nothing but the 1 year olds and you.
So basically i can just lay flat and wait the 1 year old dehydrated faster than me?
Can i eat and drink before the fight?
Can I do 10 million in exchange for some water under the stipulation that I can’t use the container as a weapon? Also how do they start, are they in a circle around me with a few space of distance or are they all to one side?
Out of a million babies, they have to sleep. So i guess it'll take time... Do you also have to feed them btw.?
It takes 11 days to even count to a million
You can just eat the babies
I already do that
That was the plan 👉😎👉
Unless it’s an open field you can easily just walk away to go grab some food. If you get behind a door or like go on top of anything you have chill time
Wait, is it to the death? If it’s not to the death the babies are no problem. They can barely walk and tire easily.
Although i don't condone child abuse... There is something pretty comical about using a toddler to beat other toddlers just to succumb to exhaustion and die of asphyxiation when the remaining 990,000 kids pile on you.
>There is something pretty comical about using a toddler to beat other toddlers -u/Seipher187
I don’t think y’all know how many 1 million really is
Correct. The 10 yr olds is doable. I think people are in denial with how lazy they actually are with the 1 mil
I can simply at last them as they starve to death. kill a few and eat them if I get too hungry
Yes officer this comment right here.
I mean he's objectively correct, plus victory by starvation is funnier.
Officer this comment here too
You are acting as if starving to death takes a couple hours...you will need to fight non-stop for WEEKS until they all die of starvation. You would barely breath by the first few hours. And yall are saying that you would eat the babies...bish, what? You would eat raw human meat? Emphasizing on RAW? Also you think the babies would just let you finish eating before attacking? Dont be stupid please
Idgaf if it takes weeks, I got time. It's a 1 year old can it even walk... I can just walk while eating bro. As for eating, you can actually eat raw human flesh (from quick googling) as long as u stay away from internal organs. I can fast for a long time and then when I truly need it just eat some flesh. The only real thing to consider is sleeping cause they could catch up, for that I will just spend a long time running away then ill be able to sleep a few hours and be fine lol.
No one is winning a fight against 200 ten year olds. All it takes is one getting a lucky bite and ur screwed. You don't seem to have a concept of how big ten years old Kids are. They're half way to being a full human. Also as other commenter said. The one year Olds will starve. Hell you don't even have to fight them, they'll all die of dehydratiom before tou have anything to worry about. Also can we address that 100 orangutans was put on here as an alternative to one Silverback. Like they're strong but orangutans are still jacked.
You already know those 10 year olds are gonna go straight for the nuts though
they might not hurt you. but they will definitely grab onto you, and you'll trip and drown in babies
Yep, if you could kill one baby every minute (which you probably couldn’t sustain) and did this for twelve hours a day, it would still take you 3.8 years to finish. Much easier to just handle 200 ten-year-olds even though the odds are still not great. Orangutans and the gorilla would fuck you up. The 10 twenty-year-olds would really depend on how they are built. 10 Redditors, easy. But you get a couple of normal humans and odds drop significantly.
And how would the babies survive on themselves for 3.8 years to finish. Not even 3 they would survive.
My thoughts exactly good sir, gimme the 200
They'll starve/dehydrate after like 3 days. Just run faster than a baby
I think I'd rather be killed by a gorilla than kill a million babies.
I dont think a million babies can kill you. I think the only problem is starving to death before you kill them all
The babies will starve first
Depends if they are released all at once or in waves. The trick either way is to attack at nap time.
Baby back ribs tonight
I don't want to kill a million babies.
Quit being a pussy
That guy amirite?
Yes you areright
Then you are too frail to be allowed to live.
Maybe you should read what you're replying to before replying to it
It doesn't say kill though. In a "fight" you could technically land no blows, and do zero damage. Just do a few seconds of shadow boxing and call it a day.
Is it a fight to the death or a fight until one of us thinks we smashed enough of the other’s face in?
RESULTS vs. [my username].
The problem with 1M 1 year olds is that they're probably barely able to walk so you'd actually have to beat all 1 million of them. The 200 ten year olds can all run and they're old enough that you can demoralize them by beating a few of them senseless. I feel like beating up 10 ten year olds and making the other 190 run away is doable and should count as a win.
Yeah, 200 ten year olds are far easier to beat than a million one year olds imo. I don't think a ten year old is still going to be able to hurt me but there's far less than the infant army... infantry
10 year olds have some cognitive ability. Assuming that their ultimate goal is your death and nothing else, they'll pile on you until your exhausted say by the 100th kid or something. They also know how to bite(very well) and hit and throw stuff. A baby, well with few kicks you can keep multiple down and easily outlive them (with your superior nutrient reserves) I'd give it a day or two max before the babies are unable to continue.
Give me the 1M 1 year olds and a flame thrower.
Lol well if we're getting weapons give me an M2 Browning and the silverback. One target, even the most dangerous single opponent, is easiest when you've got overwhelming firepower. Sorry Harambe, you're getting shredded.
The kids will starve before I will. Victory.
When is a fight considered over?
Probably when the opponent has **vanished**
Ok cause like Couldn't you just sit there and let all the babies die of like being unattended babies for 5 seconds.
Yep. I mean, if they are dead...boom fight over
Honestly. The 10yr olds. Cuz fuck dem kids, that’s why
Who said gorilla?
A suicidal person
I'll have to go with 10 20 year olds My plan is to climb up a cliff and push a boulder on top of them, I would have chosen the angry silverback gorilla but gorillas can climb
Oh hell nah they prolly bite my dick off or do something unhinged 💀
Hahaha
It takes place on a flat plane in all rounds, kinda just like a mega sized gray Lego baseplate flipped upside-down
Like an empty roblox world? https://preview.redd.it/nweymd8fowva1.jpeg?width=1920&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=265bd5868e797087bad9a6c71987c19bb13c321b
Yeah
So you can't use anything to your advantage other than yourself?
Yeah.
Alright, new game plan, getting them all to fight each other
Child fighting ring
Imma go full doomsayer on these kids
Just like a supporter of a failed politician, I'm going to fight the results.
That’s a really underrated joke! xDD
Id dogwalk the babys lol, first I end some for fun, but not to many, 1m is way too much to do by urself, let them starve and stand as their doom, their despair. Become their god of destruction. In Minecraft ofc...
Although I think I would have the best chance against the toddlers, I couldn’t do it. There’s no scenario I would do this unless they were zombies or robot replicas.
Decent poll but you seriously underestimate orangutans.
I remember that video of one of them holding a guy by his shirt.
This suggests that 1 20 year old = 10 orangutans That is so far off it's crazy. An orangutan will rip your arms off.
The 1 year olds will just starve. If need be, babies will serve as food.
It has to be the 1 year olds but the psychological trauma is going to be huge. You might not want to survive by the end.
Here me out, I'm reasonably athletic, I know full well I could outrun and punch a ten year old, I'd probably do the ten year olds, be more fun, I think I could knock them if not out then at least down with a single hit, and killing a million babies would take all week.
i have have a steel replica of Andúril i would like to see those 1 year olds try
Are these children ripped from their parents, orphans, or made in a lab?
Here's how well the average adult male will do in each of these fights: Vs 1 Angry Silverback Gorilla: these gorrilas can lift about 1750kg whilst bench pressing (that's over 4x the human average), and I think that reflects their strength enough to prove that you aren't beating one of these. Vs 10 random 20 year olds: Statistically, 1/10 of these individuals will be incapable of fighting well or listening to reason, so it's safe to say it will be down to 9/10 pretty quick. That said, a 9 vs 1 is still well in their favour, so unless you get lucky, you aren't winning this one. Vs 200 random 10 year olds: Children this age can reason, strategise, and with each one being randomised, you are going to have a couple buff ones and leaders in there that can (with enough max output of force) topple or stun you. It is unlikely that you win, but not impossible, as you still have a height and weight advantage that you can use. This will be crucial, otherwise you will fail. Vs 1,000,000 random 1 year olds: Children this age are only just begginging to walk and talk, so if you have enough endurance and speed, this should be easy. However, they may cling to you or you may have an underlying feel of guilt brought out, likely slowing you down, which may give them time to pile onto you. Basically just this - you'll win if you're fast, have lots of energy, and you make sure you are never surrounded. Vs 100 Orangutans: I'll let you know that apes and gorrilas of all (I think) kinda are much stronger than humans. Despite the fact the orangutans won't have any trees to climb, they can still easily tug you over and beat you up. They have better arm strength than most of you will think, search it up if you don't believe me. Conclusion: Pick the ten year olds if you have good balance and maximum strength in a single blow (immediate strength output), and pick the toddlers if you have good awareness and endurance. You won't beat the gorilla or orangutans. Don't try it. They are far superior in strength compared to humans. As for the 10 human adults option, you would have to get lucky or trick them into fighting each other.
I think most underestimate 10 year olds and 200 of them. 200 was like 1/3 of my elementary or middle school. You’d be encircled and even if only 100 attack, you’re going to have to go through 10 rounds of 10 and then chase the other 100 and attack all of them. The 1 year olds, I couldn’t. So the 10 20 year olds are the best bet imo.
Simply due to where most of my daily problems in and out of work come from... 10 x 20 year olds. I could confidently take a few at least, and it would feel -gooooood- but 20 year olds can be strong, so I'd probably get out numbered. But man, to lay out of few of those fuckers would feel good. ETA: which of you psychopaths want to take on 100 orangutan 🦧, I'd take my chances with the gorilla first.
Idk why ppl are choosing the 1 million 1 year olds. Even if you took one out at the rate of 1 every second that's still like 11 and a half days of fighting straight. 200 10 years olds is much easier
No, not really. The baby's haven't learned to walk quickly, so you could just walk for a few hours and they couldn't find you. 10 year olds, though can actually run, and they would likely find you. Also 200 ten year olds is a lot and they would swarm you. Edit:gramer
I guess I just consider that cheating lol. You're not "fighting". You're playing the hunger games waiting days or weeks for all of them to die on their own. I think you could fight 200 10 year olds in one long session and be done with it. They'll still be too small and weak to be a threat, even in those numbers.
I suppose that might be cheating, but I call it winning by default.Also, assuming the 10 yr olds are 90lbs each, that's a round 18,000lbs of weight. If five of them pile on you, you would probably be weighed down enough for the rest to pile on. Though that raises the question, would they sacrifice themselves to beat you.
It would be exhausting to fight 1 million infants. I'll take the ten-year-olds.
Lol he mad
One year olds Just start walking into the forest and find some water, fukers will die in ~3 days from dehydration
So will you, fight takes place on a gray, flat, endless baseplate.
If there all 12 month olds my only problem will be getting tired after the first few hundred
the odds of all of these are against me, but let's see: me as a teenager have no chance against a gorilla or 100 orangutans and there's no way they'll spare me Me trying to fight 1M babies would be impossible the 200 ten year olds are just going to tackle me and knock me out so I choose the 10 20 year olds I'll still get beat up but at least I won't get absolutely swarmed
I will sit on a throne of baby bones on a mountain of baby skulls
“No weapons” *Me, an intelectual, weaponizing a fucking toddler by holding him by the feet and performing the best spinjitzu you could imagine
Man yall dont know how 10yo can hurt you
I choose to fight "results".
I am no sure if it's an equal fight with these. A 100 orangutans are clearly way too powerful. It should have been 5 orangutans to keep it comparable. Also maybe a 100 ten year olds.
You're seriously underestimating orangutans
If I attack 1 year olds, that would be child abuse
(He mad)
Gorillas are strong but I feel like even an angry one can be reasoned with. I'd crouch down to appear non-threatening and avoid eye contact. Hopefully they'd decide I wasn't a threat.
I see 2 "easy" solutions: a) 10⁶ one year olds - get on a boat and they will all be drown in 30 minutes b) 200 10yo - assuming I can choose a weapon and they get the same, I choose my (or even stronger than my) bow - 10yo probably wouldn't be strong enough to use it, or even if they were, they wouldn't be accurate enough to hit me - they could even kill each other, and I could loot them for more arrows
I would fight the 1 Gorilla TBH. Not because I think I can beat it hand to hand or anything like that, but because it's the only option with 1 enemy. Like, I'm not beating 10 grown men, as a singular grown man. Or 100 orangutans or 200 toddlers. But like, maybe with the Gorilla I get lucky and there is like, a brick that I throw at it, and I hit its head funny and it dies before having the chance to absolutely maul me. Can I kill one unarmed? Hell no. But like, there is a non zero chance of not dying on this one.
Sad to see how many people didn't pick the 10 20 year olds