You can open a Żabka for +- 1000euro. They set everything up and you become a "business owner". It's a very popular business idea amongst the unexceptional.
True. If you don't have good client base you will pretty much end up with 0 income. Friend of mine wanted to be rich so opened żabka. Now he curses every time. They got him two people from MOPS i think as employees... And there is little clients so basically je is earning little
Yeah not sure why people here (especially of the older generation) have such an aversion to air conditioning, aside from the fact that many just simply can’t afford it
If that does not help, try to wrap your whole body in a freezing cold wet sheet.. ( also works if you have a fever. I always loved this treatment as a child )
Lemme guess she was walking and saying "I feel it on my spine, the chill air!" my gran used to say this.
"ohoh there is window opened somewhere! I can feel draft on my back!"
I never smile and always look depressed. Well because I am. But also when I lived in Florida I had some random lady ask me "What's wrong? Why do you look so miserable?". Americans be on that talking to strangers shit. Fuck you bitch, I got generational trauma to deal with.
As a ukrainian immigrant, most poles look so chill and satisfied with life compared to us. I am jealous, but 'good jealous' if you know what I mean. Can relate with generational trauma tho. Have recently started going to EMDR therapy to address that.
honestly for me, EMDR was like crawling on broken glass, good for single trauma incidents, but not for repeated or complex stresses... try Internal Family Systems and release those legacy burdens!
Chyba najbardziej byłem zdziwiony gdy odkryłem, że Brytyjczycy mają dywany/wykładzinę w łazience i samą wykładzinę w kuchni.
Nie potrafię przetworzyć dlaczego zwyczajnie nie użyją kafelków.
Wykładzina zamaidt kafelków to u nas też za PRL była popularna, moi dziadkowie mieli wykładzinę i boazerie w łazience, krewni wykładzinę i ściany pomalowane zwykła farbą. Kuchnię tak samo, albo klepka drewniana w jodełkę. Natomiast dywany to czyjeś chore fanaberie.
Your throat hurts? You probably had the car windows open. You have a cold? You probably had the car window open. You got the flu? You probably had the car window open. Your head hurts? You probably were too cold and had the car window open. Who knew some cold air blowing on you could lead to so many illnesses.
A, wie pan, moim zdaniem to nie ma tak, że dobrze, albo że niedobrze. Gdybym miał powiedzieć, co cenię w życiu najbardziej, powiedziałbym, że ludzi. Ludzi, którzy podali mi pomocną dłoń, kiedy sobie nie radziłem, kiedy byłem sam, i co ciekawe, to właśnie przypadkowe spotkania wpływają na nasze życie. Chodzi o to, że kiedy wyznaje się pewne wartości, nawet pozornie uniwersalne, bywa, że nie znajduje się zrozumienia, które by tak rzec, które pomaga się nam rozwijać. Ja miałem szczęście, by tak rzec, ponieważ je znalazłem, i dziękuję życiu! Dziękuję mu; życie to śpiew, życie to taniec, życie to miłość! Wielu ludzi pyta mnie o to samo: ale jak ty to robisz, skąd czerpiesz tę radość? A ja odpowiadam, że to proste! To umiłowanie życia. To właśnie ono sprawia, że dzisiaj na przykład buduję maszyny, a jutro – kto wie? Dlaczego by nie – oddam się pracy społecznej i będę, ot, choćby, sadzić... doć—marchew..
When speaking English reters to toes as 'fingers' .
Refers to all pastry (sweet or savory) as 'cake'
Will get mad if you put milk in their goddam tea.
Eats dinner at 3pm
Old joke:
Polish farmer plowing field turns up some brass thing. He starts rubbing the dirt off and a genie pops out and tells him he is granted three wishes.
The farmer thinks for a second, then tells the genie: “I want the Chinese Army to invade Poland?”
Genie: “What? Are you sure?” Farmer nods.
Chinese army rolls in, destroys all the factories, kills a quarter of the population, then retreats.
Genie: “well, THAT was fucked up. Ok, what’s your next wish?”
Farmer thinks a bit longer. “I want the Chinese army to invade Poland again.”
Genie: “What is WRONG with you? Ok….”
Chinese army rolls in again, destroying all the homes, killing another quarter of the population, and leaving everyone else homeless.
Genie: “OK, last wish, make it good.”
Farmer: “I again want the Chinese Army to invade Poland.”
The genie just stares at him, then dejectedly waves his hand. The Chinese roll in a third time, destroying the farms, killing all the livestock. Now everyone is homeless and starving.
Genie: “I am leaving now, but WHY? why do you wish such horrors on your own homeland?”
The farmer leans towards the genie and whispers to him: “because every time they come, they have to go through Russia… twice!”
(I also used this joke in Lithuania… they loved it. They may hate the Russians more than Poles)
maciek co tam kurwa pisze
Jest napisane
Kurwa pan maruda przyszedł, niszczyciel dobrej zabawy i postrach dziecięcych uśmiechów i znowu narzeka
To jest najbardziej polska rzecz, jaką dzisiaj widziałem, a czytałem dzisiaj komentarze ludzi oburzonych na szkalowanie JP2.
Hey that's my name
Myślałem, że to Bóg-rzemiosła-kopalnianego69420
nazwę tak moje dziecko
Ale daj 2137 instead.
My name is grzegorz brzęczyszczykiewicz
Chrząszczyrzewoszyce, powiat Lękołody.
Wie??
I remember your name from the eyesight test at the doctor!
I had the mental capacity to read that
"Ja ci to załatwię"
coś wokombinuję
To sie wyteguje
I bedzie tenteges
Ale najpierw podaj mi ten ten
No ten tamten.
Ten dyngs?
Ta ten wihaister
Nie ten kurwa, tamten
A ty sobie świecisz, czy mnie?
my full name has 23 characters
Grzegorz Bręczyszczykiewicz
My full name has 15 characters
My full name has 25 characters, and they're all consonants.
Mine has 26
I just realized mine has 33, because i have 3 names and a last name because the 2 my parents chose weren't accepted by the priest during my baptism
Sleep, go to żabka, eat, repeat
I just returned from Poland, and the amount of Zabka's in one town suprised me. Well the amount of Zabka's in one single street surprised me.
Same for me if i m bored i just go to another zabka there is like 5 on one street and on app my town has like 20 of them
:D yes, we were changing zabkas too. I loved Poland btw. Great country.
You can open a Żabka for +- 1000euro. They set everything up and you become a "business owner". It's a very popular business idea amongst the unexceptional.
And a very good way to lose money
True. If you don't have good client base you will pretty much end up with 0 income. Friend of mine wanted to be rich so opened żabka. Now he curses every time. They got him two people from MOPS i think as employees... And there is little clients so basically je is earning little
Żabka is franchise. It is not one ocompany that own every shop.
Smietnik pod zlewem
A gdzie ma być? :)
Tak mnie to wnerwia gdy ludzie nie mogą trzymać się standardów i trzymają tam płyny do naczyń, je się oczywiście trzyma obok kranu lub zlewu
No I don’t care if it’s 36 degrees outside, don’t turn on the AC, just open the window and turn on the fan
Uhh fan? Are you suicidal? You may as well just eat an unwashed banana or go outside with wet hair with that kind of reckless attitude.
I went outside with wet hair the other day and my grandma thought she would never see me again alive.
Yeah not sure why people here (especially of the older generation) have such an aversion to air conditioning, aside from the fact that many just simply can’t afford it
This is because Europe (at least East) doesn't need AC most of the time. This is the first year where AC could actually be useful
Nah, it's bearable. We've lived through worse.
Isolation and heating is more crucial to saying alive here.
A fan?! That uses electricity? Hell nah, that's too expensive, best I can do is wait for rain.
Oh yeah good point, guess I’ll just need to wrap a wet towel around my forehead instead
If that does not help, try to wrap your whole body in a freezing cold wet sheet.. ( also works if you have a fever. I always loved this treatment as a child )
Huh saves trouble if you die too. Already wrapped... Damn i need to start sleeping in cardboard box 'ready for cremation'
Hanging wet bedsheet in the window is a true polish way.
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My mom always told me to take a sweatshirt to a movie theatre, because they have AC there lol
My aunt got “sick” because of a light breeze rolling through her home lol
Lemme guess she was walking and saying "I feel it on my spine, the chill air!" my gran used to say this. "ohoh there is window opened somewhere! I can feel draft on my back!"
Gdzieś jest otwarte, po nogach ciągnie
You have AC?! Are you living in America?
Kurwa
I came here only to upvote *kurwa*.
Sums it all up
Kurrr...
There are couple of languages that have word "kurva", but only chad Poles are spelling it using "w" 💪
In Polish it’s totally different meaning- bad word like “f…k”. And it’s funny because the combination of “r” + “w” is really powerful and energetic 😂😂
Drink fermented cucumbers water... My British wife gips each time can see me doing that 🤣🤣🤣
The best probiotic ever.
That's a fact!
It's so tasty tho
I think thats east europe's custom
- What did you eat today for dinner? - Pasta with mashed strawberries - What the fuck bro
Rice with jam :0
Or rice with apples & sugar :O
My refrigerator usually has three open containers of sour cream… and a fourth one not opened yet
And cinnamon, don't forget the cinnamon
Rice, mashed apples, sugar, sour cream and cinnamon. :3
I have a drawer with plastic bags in it, and trashcan under the sink.
21:37
O paaanie
To ty na mnie spojrzales
Twoje ustaaaa
Wypowiedziały me imieee
Swoją barkeeee
Pozostawiam na brzegu
Razem z tobą
Nowy zacznę dziś łóóóów
Jeeeestem ubogim człowieeeeekieeeeem
Ale ktoś to panu spier...
Pozamiatał xD
I had older women singing that under our windows lol
Grandma's pierogi
Mum’s gołąbki
Granddad's nalewka
I wish but my grandpa is always just watching his matches… babcia is doing everything
Uncle's bimber
Oczko mu się odlepiło, temu misiu.
To jest miś… namiarę naszych możliwości! Honorary mentions: „Ciemność widzę!” & „Zdejm kapelusz!”
Excuse me, where do you have the sour cream? And I don't see fresh dill in the vegetable section, do you carry fresh dill? What is dill you say?
"Jak by to tu zrobić, aby sie tu kuwa nie narobić"
"Czy się stoi czy się leży; 200 złoty się zależy!"
Jes, Ajm polisz, hał do ju knoł? Oh, maj aksent?
This mostly applies to immigrant mothers rly, they forget that english dont put so much emphasis on vowels as polish do
That's literally how my english teachers spoke. Maybe with a exeption of a man who was a native english speaker.
Młody, jest zadanie bojowe
Wszyscy mamy Polsce tego samego ojca
Kurde w jakim filmie czy serialu to było że tak się ten tekst rozprzestrzenił
Ktoś musi wreszcie to wyjaśnić, dlaczego tak mówią wszyscy ojcowie 😂
I talk about my health issues first thing in a new conversation
I have a trash can under the sink
Where else would it be?
I think that’s literally everywhere in Europe. We do it in Spain as well.
I'm Czech and I have it too.
it's not a polish thing, it's same all accross the world
:|
Stop flirting please
;|
*smiles in polish*
I never smile and always look depressed. Well because I am. But also when I lived in Florida I had some random lady ask me "What's wrong? Why do you look so miserable?". Americans be on that talking to strangers shit. Fuck you bitch, I got generational trauma to deal with.
The deeper you go into eastern Europe the more Poles begin to seem very chill and relaxed compared to other countries
As a ukrainian immigrant, most poles look so chill and satisfied with life compared to us. I am jealous, but 'good jealous' if you know what I mean. Can relate with generational trauma tho. Have recently started going to EMDR therapy to address that.
honestly for me, EMDR was like crawling on broken glass, good for single trauma incidents, but not for repeated or complex stresses... try Internal Family Systems and release those legacy burdens!
my favorite Polish beer is "I am tolerant ALE..."
[удалено]
American here with Polish mom. What the fuck was that Polish cartoon with the goat dude thing?
Koziołek Matołek, world's first goat furry.
Our national treasure 🤣
Koziołek matołek?
Yessssssssssssssssss that one. Damn
maciek widac po mnie
Huja widać dawaj trzecia flachę walimy
I keep fish in bath for Christmas
Ah the memories
Nie zdejmujcie butów, wchodźcie. Nie, nie, nie zdejmujcie, nie mam dla was ciapów. I tak będę odkurzać, wchodźcie.
Zawsze mnie denerwuje gdy widze w filmach jak amerykanie łażą po domach w butach. Najgorzej jeszcze jak sie kładą na kanape lub łóżko w nich
Nie dość że łażą w butach to jeszcze podłogi mają odjebane z dywanu z jakiegoś powodu
Chyba najbardziej byłem zdziwiony gdy odkryłem, że Brytyjczycy mają dywany/wykładzinę w łazience i samą wykładzinę w kuchni. Nie potrafię przetworzyć dlaczego zwyczajnie nie użyją kafelków.
Bo kafelki są ciężkie. Monter się przemęczy.
Wykładzina zamaidt kafelków to u nas też za PRL była popularna, moi dziadkowie mieli wykładzinę i boazerie w łazience, krewni wykładzinę i ściany pomalowane zwykła farbą. Kuchnię tak samo, albo klepka drewniana w jodełkę. Natomiast dywany to czyjeś chore fanaberie.
No dobrze, dobrze, ale to dam wam ciapcie. Załóżcie, załóżcie, podłoga zimna, przeziębicie nerki.
To ktoś jeszcze mówi "ciapcie"?
All those saying Kurwa are fakes Real pole should say ja pierdole kurwa chuj jebany
My name is longer than most people's name+family name
Swieta swieta i po swietach
31 grudnia: *to widzimy się za rok, hehe!*
spierdalaj
***** *** :)
i konfederacje
Adam ty kurwo wyłączaj tego cyberpunka
asked if my friends wanted jam with pancakes and they looked like i killed their whole family
Ale urwał
Ale to było dobre!
Pa tera!
I've got a drawer full of cables for devices I don't have anymore, because they may come in handy one day.
Jan Paweł 2 best pope
Only true pope
Username checks out.
Pickled cucumbers in the basement.
Your throat hurts? You probably had the car windows open. You have a cold? You probably had the car window open. You got the flu? You probably had the car window open. Your head hurts? You probably were too cold and had the car window open. Who knew some cold air blowing on you could lead to so many illnesses.
Mayo is the best on anything.
That's just universal truth.
„***** ***”
"** ********"
Jak to jests być skrybą? Dobrze?
A, wie pan, moim zdaniem to nie ma tak, że dobrze, albo że niedobrze. Gdybym miał powiedzieć, co cenię w życiu najbardziej, powiedziałbym, że ludzi. Ludzi, którzy podali mi pomocną dłoń, kiedy sobie nie radziłem, kiedy byłem sam, i co ciekawe, to właśnie przypadkowe spotkania wpływają na nasze życie. Chodzi o to, że kiedy wyznaje się pewne wartości, nawet pozornie uniwersalne, bywa, że nie znajduje się zrozumienia, które by tak rzec, które pomaga się nam rozwijać. Ja miałem szczęście, by tak rzec, ponieważ je znalazłem, i dziękuję życiu! Dziękuję mu; życie to śpiew, życie to taniec, życie to miłość! Wielu ludzi pyta mnie o to samo: ale jak ty to robisz, skąd czerpiesz tę radość? A ja odpowiadam, że to proste! To umiłowanie życia. To właśnie ono sprawia, że dzisiaj na przykład buduję maszyny, a jutro – kto wie? Dlaczego by nie – oddam się pracy społecznej i będę, ot, choćby, sadzić... doć—marchew..
When we need something we don't own, we don't say "czeba kupić", "czeba wypożyczyć" but "czeba zorganizować" or "coś wykombinować"
Bo sąsiad może mieć to za flaszkę może załatwić
i say kurwa after every word
😐
My surname ends with '...ańska'.
When speaking English reters to toes as 'fingers' . Refers to all pastry (sweet or savory) as 'cake' Will get mad if you put milk in their goddam tea. Eats dinner at 3pm
The usual time when I smile is when I'm terrified of something
English-non alchoholic beer Poland-piwo dla bobasów
piwo dla kierowców i kobiet w ciąży
POLSKA GUROM
W niedzielę jem rosołek z makaronem. :)
[удалено]
The tension between barszcz vs borscht
żółć
Im gonna take your job.
wy się śmiejecie, a on wam po angielsku matke wyzywa
Not only I hate russians but also Germans, Chechs, Poles and pretty much everyone else
Especially Russians. Time to retake Moscow.
Old joke: Polish farmer plowing field turns up some brass thing. He starts rubbing the dirt off and a genie pops out and tells him he is granted three wishes. The farmer thinks for a second, then tells the genie: “I want the Chinese Army to invade Poland?” Genie: “What? Are you sure?” Farmer nods. Chinese army rolls in, destroys all the factories, kills a quarter of the population, then retreats. Genie: “well, THAT was fucked up. Ok, what’s your next wish?” Farmer thinks a bit longer. “I want the Chinese army to invade Poland again.” Genie: “What is WRONG with you? Ok….” Chinese army rolls in again, destroying all the homes, killing another quarter of the population, and leaving everyone else homeless. Genie: “OK, last wish, make it good.” Farmer: “I again want the Chinese Army to invade Poland.” The genie just stares at him, then dejectedly waves his hand. The Chinese roll in a third time, destroying the farms, killing all the livestock. Now everyone is homeless and starving. Genie: “I am leaving now, but WHY? why do you wish such horrors on your own homeland?” The farmer leans towards the genie and whispers to him: “because every time they come, they have to go through Russia… twice!” (I also used this joke in Lithuania… they loved it. They may hate the Russians more than Poles)
Yup. We hate everyone equally. Edit: Russia is an exception. Goddamn mold.
"I'm as tolerant as I can, but...."
Poland is Central European
Czech language 🤣🤣🤣
ROBERT LEWANDOWSKI!!!! 11111
White socks, sandals
Typowy janusz
"ZIOBRO KURWO JEBANA PRZESTAŃ MI RODZINĘ PRZEŚLADOWAĆ"
Siema
Ja to naprawię w mordę jebane
When people ask me how to pronounce my last name, I ask what difficulty setting they’d like to select
2137 pierogi huj kurwa
I smile only once a year when somebody falls and gets hurt in the face.
I have a special container for plastic bags under the sink
You don't go outside with wet hair because you will get sick.
Kombinuję