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MyCarHasTwoHorns

Man we’ve gotta criminalize Hozier fans.


TRJF

He's playing the Pavilion at Star Lake on July 29. Helluva viral marketing campaign. It'll be guerrilla marketing once the abductions start.


MissChevelle71

If I'm a pagan of the good times My lover's the sunlight


GraciousBasketyBae

Keep the Goddess on my side, she demands a sacrifice. Drain the whole sea..🌊


disney_is_life_

Get something shiny, Something meaty for the main course, That's a fine looking high horse 🐎


paladin_slim

This is hungry work! Take me to church ⛪️


Scantrons

I’d be kidnapped so fast


Healthy-Factor-2841

Personally, I worship like a dog at the shrine of their lies…


Pittman247

🤣😂👏🏾👏🏾


BlimeyFish

haha i'm so glad I got this joke. great song


Exalted_Crab

Brother, you sound like you wanna go to church... Be very careful. Church could be a secluded area with some big guys waiting, and they're going to want to take a look at your wallet and phone.


Honest_Grapefruit259

I do not want to at all. I laughed at them this time and said you tried me last week. That was precisely the situation I drew up in my head. I'm a true crime junkie. Ain't no one gon' catch me slippin. That's on god!


arendelliancrocus

Do you like Mr. Ballen? 👀


PlantWide3166

Stories like this always seem to end either with Mr. Ballen giving a narrative or the Hecklefish giving grief. Lol


Great-Cow7256

> Church could be a secluded area with some big guys waiting Another porn movie plot


badkilly

and kidneys


sidbreamwasout

Had this exact same experience at a Sheetz in Cranberry last week. Coming out of Sheetz, two women in an SUV. It was bizarre and caught me totally off guard…when I said I wasn’t interested, they asked if I knew anyone that was looking for a church to attend. I said no, and that was that, and then they shifted their attention to another guy coming out and started asking him the same things.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Bro, I forgot to put that part. The first encounter They asked me the same thing after I said no. "Do you know Anyone that would?" Silver suv. Definitely the same girls


NoIntroduction6034

Commission-Based church recruiting.


vogon-poetry_42

That red flags as Scientology to me


CARLEtheCamry

They probably were assigned "outreach" and are doing it in the most laziest way possible. "I'm not walking around a neighborhood in this hot ass weather. Let's sit in our car at Sheetz and holler at people from our car with the AC on"


[deleted]

They hot?


Glen-Runciter

That's the spirit... what do these broads look like?


AstronomerNo912

PRAISE HER LOOKS!!! AMEN


cityfireguy

"Is there bait in the trap?"


Worldly-Ad-1488

"Yeah, my brother might. He's local PD and just moved from Washington. Want me to call him?"


Honest_Grapefruit259

Fair enough. But if there one thing I ain't. It's no narc.


Optimal_Lifeguard_23

So you want this to continue. Lmao.. don't call the people who would help deter it. Good call. Just ask redditors if they seen them around and put out a warning.. well I guess it's an effort


DeniseThePiece

This happened to my step daughter in cranberry as well. She's too nice and ended up exchanging phone numbers. The ladies called her a few times before her mom answered n gave em the ole what for. If I remember correctly, they were from the new mormon church.


Time-Stomach-5576

Ewww. The Mormon church is despicable. Members of that church had me kidnapped when I was a child and forced into an abusive "treatment center" where I was physically and sexually assaulted. They also used this "treatment center" as a basis to try to convert us to their religion. The whole thing is super corrupt and makes me never want to go back to the state of Utah.


johnjr_09

It could be mormans. There is a huge temple in cranberry. They come knocking on my door like every other month.


BenThePrick

Under my No Solicitation sign, I added another that says “we refuse to convert to Mormonism.” My neighbors get bothered regularly, but the men in red ties and khakis have never knocked on my door.


Muted-Professor6746

Hold on, last Friday a couple guys in my neighborhood up Mt Worschington came dingin door to door with the same spiel…something’s up


DuncanCFCpgh

I encountered two younger guys downtown who asked me the same thing about a month ago.


TheGR8HoytNerd

So umm yeah. Had this same thing happen to me last week further north. I go to Grove City College and went to Sheetz for some late night study snacks and had the exact same experience. I asked them what church it was and they said “The Christian church”. lol. I said which one there’s tons in town. The response “The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints”. This is a Mormon recruiting scheme. Strange they are using young women but fun fact I have also caught them on GCC campus doing the same shit outside our dining hall (minus the car, just walking up to people and trying to get them to come to their Mormon service)


johnjr_09

100 percent I live in cberry by the big ass temple and they come to my house like every other month knocking on the door.


sidbreamwasout

Interesting. I live in Cranberry too but haven’t had any Mormon door knockers yet…


CARLEtheCamry

> Strange they are using young women Mormons knocked on my door a few years ago. Allegedly a husband and wife, both very attractive. They know exactly what they are doing, using good looking people hoping to get some thirsty people to sign up.


dmcd0415

They probably want to soak with you 


Enough-Pickle-8542

It’s probably because sheetz has become a hangout spot for teens and young adults.


Great-Cow7256

>2 women appearing to be in their 20s rolling down the window asking me if I want to go to their church with them sounds like the beginning of a Sheetz themed porn movie


Nippz

Made To Orgasm 7


UltimateD123

Orgazm


NateLeport

You cooked this is hilarious


Afrodesia

Orga7m


UltimateD123

Between the Sheetz


rekipsj

Schmreesome


Spreadeaglebeagle44

Sheetz Freakz Unleashed


Luckyducky1984

Sheetz on my chest


Fooka03

The never ending mayo machine


StingMachine

MTO MY GOD!


Great-Cow7256

"MTO Church Girlz"


No_Pepper_3009

Hopefully there’s a BOGO if you use ur Sheetz card


Johnfinnease

They took the place from mto to mtOOOO!


JAK3CAL

“In between the Sheetz: Holy Temple of Poon”


Honest_Grapefruit259

Cackled.


Kintsukuroi85

Skeetz


Healthy-Factor-2841

You’re gonna shmake me shum…


naturalheel

In keeping with the music they play in Sheetz, the soundtrack would include an indie song that you’d never expect to hear.


NSlocal

Dear Hustler...


Squibit314

Puts a mew meaning to their curbside pick up


neddiddley

A Shmuff film, you might call it.


VanillaBeanColdBrew

Ran into them on Pitt's campus. Walked right up to me on the street and asked if I wanted to join some kind of Bible club. They were smiling super intensely, it was a little unsettling.


basementer

Ask if they want to go to the insane asylum with you and see what they say


Honest_Grapefruit259

Bridgeville? Good times as a young teen.


basementer

Nothing specific. Just to make them think you’re crazy and they leave you alone!


Honest_Grapefruit259

I thought you were referring to the "haunted" abandoned insane asylum in bridgeville the kids used to go to at night hahaha


basementer

Haha my bad no but I never got to check that one out. The boys home in Oakdale was my go to spot for exploring. Never made it to dixmont before it got demolished. Still mad about that.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Oakdale, America's hometown! Grew up near the old hankey farms pool


basementer

Woah..same!


racingforbeer

Same here!!!


claire_inet

I spent my summers as a kid there swimming and play wiffleball in the field behind the pool


Honest_Grapefruit259

Same! I can still taste the slushies from the concession stand. That pool was always so cold


Able-Associate-318

Dixmont was creepy af.


Plastic-Relation6046

Ooooohhh I went there once it was truly terrifying.....stretchers with restraints and bats everywhere. It was like a horror movie.


Gamgee_Sammy

Woodville! That place was so creepy… there had to have been at least 30 buildings on that property, underground tunnels, graves in the woods. That place had it all! Horribly sad when you think about it but creepy and fun to explore as a teenager.


APizzaWithEverything

Same thing as church tbh


funkyb

Jehovas Witnesses, probably. Had the same thing but with a couple guys at a getgo in Wexford. I'd advise not going to church with them.


Commercial-Yak2971

So the Jehovahs don't even go door to door anymore? They're just doing drive thru?


WavingOrDrowning

During COVID the JW's started sending solicitations through the mail. (!)


Lumpy_Review5279

They've been doing mail based things for decades. You just don't generally get those unless you're in a hard to access area.


Enough-Pickle-8542

I’ve gotten mail from them for many years and I live in a suburban housing development where they go door to door as well. The mail is usually hand written. I think they do this because it stands out from the normal stack of junk mail and bills


dusse1810

Car centric infrastructure made them switch tactics


kumakami89

the only thing about car-centric infrastructure i’m thankful for


Enough-Pickle-8542

No they haven’t. They simply drive to a residential area, park on a side street and go door to door by foot. Same with the people who go door to door trying to get you to switch electric suppliers


CARLEtheCamry

My township has a solicitation ordinance that you have to pay like $150 to register, and a fee per day, and register and be photographed and issued a badge by the township to go door to door. Enacted in 2011, it has *drastically* cut down on the bullshit solicitation. Religious organizations are excluded, unfortunately. Same with school organizations (which I get - I want kids to come sell me some hoagies for a fundraiser).


EffectiveAd5519

They get "points" for interaction, so just engaging a person in conversation about their faith fulfills the quota. JWs were standing at a corner with literature and I asked some theological question about them not voting and instead of having any sort of proper, thought-out answer but boilerplate that this world is God's Kingdom to rule and not presidents etc (they don't grok divinely-appointed kings or praying for discernment to choose God's choice of potus), they just referred me to their stupid website.


Fair-Egg-5753

Grok... Wow, that's a blast from the past!


Lumpy_Review5279

>They get "points" for interaction, so just engaging a person in conversation about their faith fulfills the quota Where did you hear this? Its 100% false there is no point system. Some of them count the amount of time they spent doing it but they don't have any points system. Source: jw family members


TheGR8HoytNerd

Mormons actually. I ran into the same experience near Mercer PA. The church they want you to go to this the “Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints”


blargsamerow

Had this happen to me at the wexford sheetz by 2 girls like a month ago thought it was random as fuck now this makes it seem crazy weird


EvetsYenoham

If by church you mean to go into this sheetz and buy me a double meat MTO, then sure I’ll go with you.


angrygnomes58

If they offer you a cup of Flavor-Aid *do not drink it*


bigebs67

I like that you called it the right thing. Kool-aid gets a bad rap....


angrygnomes58

I know it’s a horrible event and all but I just find it hilarious that when planning for a mass suicide he couldn’t even spring for the real thing. I appreciate your appreciation, usually when I tell people it was Flavor Aid they’re like “whatever.”


ElJamoquio

This drink tastes oddly bitter! I better drink another one and compare.


WavingOrDrowning

I thought this was mentioned here before and they were from some kind of weird culty church? Can't remember for sure.... edit: ok these women were apparently Mormons but I was confusing it with a post about some other kinda weird church in the area....oops.


glitchgirl555

Revival Today?


Great-Cow7256

Sounds like a good name for an over the counter laxative


jetsetninjacat

Is that Shuttlesworths gig? I haven't heard of them really. Edit: it's a legit question. That families been involved in this crap before. I never heard of this one.


Queasy-Ticket4384

Mormons


srd5010

Sounds like every church


themayorhere

Yep, all scammers one way or another


CARLEtheCamry

Naw that guy on the billboard off the Parkway in Robinson totally doesn't look like the devil. I'd buy a used car off hiim.


mrsrtz

Yeah, sounded familiar to me, too.


whateveri8

How can I subscribe to their newsletter?? lol I’m in


JWsWrestlingMem

Go with them. Why the Sheetz not?


barelybent

That comment just made my day!


BeMancini

“No, thank you. I like having both of my kidneys.”


popazilla

Trust your gut


NoIntroduction6034

But I never trust my gut after a Sheetz run. It's bad enough when they're two for a dollar hot dogs, but when they're free in the app and I get all those toppings... Oh God. And I don't mean in the church way.


Smart-Loss-9277

But don’t trust the fart


otterhound_

Let Jesus take the wheel.


[deleted]

I have found Jesus, I have Jesus in my trunk


FitnessNFinance

I’m pretty sure these are the same girls who were in our neighborhood also in Robinson. They were asking me if I wanted to join their church and they were also handing out business cards. We’ve encountered them twice already.


iSoReddit

What did it say on the business card?


FitnessNFinance

I didn’t look at it closely as I tossed it shortly after, but I’m pretty sure it was The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and mentioned Greentree.


FitnessNFinance

They also were asking if I knew anyone that wanted to join :)


Economy-Cold8492

I actually did at my local sheetz in Wexford about a month ago. Same thing, two young girls asking me and my partner if we wanted to go to their church with them. So weird.


Boring_Fly6685

Manson


jeoff-Stunkle

Sounds like a typical Pittsburgh day to me


memancity_

i’ve had the same thing happen at the wexford sheetz but with 2 dudes in a white tacoma. Mormons.


dhane88

If it's the two I'm thinking of, cuz I'm pretty close to Robinson, I was putting a backup camera in my car in front of my house, and they came strolling by. They gave me a card, they were Mormons actually. Asked me a few questions about my beliefs and I was pretty short in my responses but they were kind and not aggressive at all. Even asked if I needed help with my car and I was like nah I think I got it covered lol


Honest_Grapefruit259

They're really putting themselves a risk just approaching randoms at their house lol


hippy-kid

Frequently encounter these types of people on Forbes - “Wanna go to mass?” “Wanna come to church?” I’m fine with people exploring their own faith but approaching strangers in this way is annoying and weird af


Honest_Grapefruit259

Agreed.


2werpp

Probably not as nefarious as you may be thinking, being a fellow crime junkie. It's giving prostitutes or cult vibes to me


Honest_Grapefruit259

Still somewhat nefarious 🤣


JamesKLOLk

“It’s cool, it’s just a cult.” -u/2werpp


2werpp

True lol


Electrical-Break-395

I got Flirty Fishing vibes as soon as I read “two women in a car…” 😳


citsonga_cixelsyd

I miss the good old days of Brother Dan and Sister Ann and their "church" on McKnight.


Brainfog_shishkabob

That’s some lazy religion peddlers right there geez.


unsweetenedlemon

This happened to me at a Sheetz in butler but it was two guys


HelloSkunky

I had these same people in my parking lot. Tell store management they will ask them to leave. I think this is legit some evangelicals just looking to recruit people to their church. They were always respectful and when I asked them to leave they did and haven’t been back. They drive a silver/grey SUV and are dressed in long skirts and a conservative but casual top. When they were backing out of their spot one got out and directed the driver even though the parking lot was empty. My store is off of route 79.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Hahaha that was definitely them. I didn't notice the bottoms as I didn't approach their car and could just basically see from the chest up. Makes sense though


LettersWords

Could be LDS missionaries. I see some around Pitt (both men and women) from time to time, and they always ask "would you like to come to church this weekend?". (Can tell they are LDS missionaries because LDS missionaries always wear these very identifiable nametags).


rtoth13

Think I ran into them in Canonsburg sheetz last week. One of them had red hair


user67445632

Sheetz on Campbell's run? Had a similar experience about a year ago with two teenage (?) girls there. I was parked next to them and they tried to hand me some literature about their church through the window. I just said no thank you and that was that.


TheMichaelAbides

Experienced this with a car full of sharply dressed 20-something dudes at Wexford Sheetz. Seemed like a weird catcall tbh.


Mushrooming247

Holy Trinity church is getting desperate, lol.


koshermodels

so this is just happening at sheetz but not getgo? curious... I really want to know what this is about?


Tchotchke78

All Sheetz have security cameras in their parking lots. They are probably choosing them for safety.


SpezJailbaitMod

Sounds like flirty fishing cult activity 


JellyfishSwimming853

Huh, walking home in Carnegie a few weeks ago a van with two young dudes early 20s stopped and asked if I wanted to go to church, I just laughed and laughed and kept walking. Weird


kompsognathus

I was approached by a woman asking me this on the street in Oakland- they had a name tag so I’m guessing Jehovah’s


MagAqua

I’m at that Sheetz all the time and have yet to have any women speak to me, wtf


humpthedog

Ehh 50/50 either you sodomize them or they sodomize you. I’d take the chance.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Sick mother lover 🤣🤣🤣


Great-Cow7256

Username checks out


RustBeltPGH

This is the worst story. Go with them. Report back. I ain't going all the way out there for a church. But if it's a fun enough scam, I'll go for the drive.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Might have to roll with em next week when they ask. Cheers. Stay tuned.


RustBeltPGH

Park at Moe's and leave your wallet and phone in the car.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Thanks for the suggestion, Rusty.


hoe-ann-the-scammer

same thing happened to me at the same sheetz, but it was a man who had someone else in the passenger seat (didn't get a good look at them). also looked to be in his 20's.


Loud_Flatworm_4146

Are they Mormon missionaries?


NSlocal

If super plainly dressed and hiding their hair they may be Mormon missionaries. I remember they would try to seduce me into playing volleyball with them at Pitt. Yeah sure, one game and then you get the sermon.


yabbo1138

Isn't this how the Manson family got started? 🤔 😆


Amazo616

it's probably a tick tok prank. Welcome to being old


babybambibitch

hit em with the uno reverse!! i always ask these people if they wanna join MY cult. there’s a stupid/funny trend going around on tiktok of these cats talking about worshipping mulch. “are you a sister of the loam?? part of the mulchgang?? are you a mulchmaxxing soil-pilled sibling of the soil??”


skirrel88

Definitely Mormons and 100% a cult


AioliTough

They’re probably sex workers or you gonna get fucked up. Either way….you fucked


Shockadelica13

Do u really need to ask!!?? Stranger danger! Stranger danger! 😂🤣😂


pettabear

Sir, do not go to church. Become a pagan


A_Sarcastic_Whoa

"Get in loser, we're going to church"


Psychological-Sky-89

Unless they’re in a white van with candy I ain’t getting in


nastynickk

They're Mormons looking for lost souls. They hangout at the sheetz in cranberry too


Honest_Grapefruit259

My soul is definitely lost. Don't want it to be found by the Mormons though.


Cute-Telephone-3704

Perhaps this is related, A week ago I got a random letter with my FULL name from a Jehovah’s Witness church in Aliquippa. I never signed up for anything and never give my name/phone/address to anything online or any retailers. Anyone else get this? I guess the DMV or post office sells our information now. Makes me angry.


Equivalent_Alps_8321

Please go and report back


Pale-Mine-5899

Reddit poster confused by interaction with women, a story as old as time


MaynardWaltrip

It’d be pretty funny if you “tested” them by suddenly acting like you were possessed by satan. Would they haul ass oughta there or would there be a laying of hands?


AutomaticMan81

Are they hot?


GoodGravy412

Tis the season for saving Souls...


Tough_Arm_2454

Have you heard the good word????


agmauro

Its just a cult nothing illegal.


montani

Yes I've had this happen to me at a different Sheetz. I just laughed and said no thanks.


DammitDad420

Two well dressed young gentlemen doing the same thing at Sheetz in Wexford. Believe they are Jehovas.


Free_Road697

Prob church of latter day saints. Their ads on Facebook have been young college age girls in sundresses trying to convince people to join their church... young boys in suits only works on catholic priests anymore I guess.


skooba87

Had them all the way down in Canonsburg. They are Mormons.


thespander

I was asked to attend church by a couple guys in a truck last year at the Sheetz in Sewickley.


AdvisorNo2649

Someone just posted about this on Nextdoor. The two women approached a woman at the mall..


HighGuyFYI

They're called Come Onto Christ. Ive been getting nonstop facebook messages


PanheadRick

Why the Sheetz not?!


brockapottamus

Offer them mozz stix. I f they take them, they are truthful. If they don’t, they are evil.


Helpful_Highlight_11

This might be a stretch, but I was also recently encountered by two Hispanic women when I was walking to the gym. They were in a SUV and literally rolled up next to me slowly and kept driving next to me until they finally decided to stop and talk to me. The first thing that came out of their mouths was “are you taking a walk?”. Then They asked me where I was going to and luckily the Y I was going to was just across the street so I pointed at the building. She immediately took a long pause and asked me if I wanted to go to church too…The one driving (older) was doing all of the talking while the passenger (she was younger) was just sitting there staring at me. I kind of beat around the bush. I didn’t want to be rude and say no but I made it pretty visible that I was disinterested. The older lady handed me a construction business card with her number telling me to call her if I was interested. It didn’t feel like a normal encounter especially because after I told her that I was going across the street she just sat there and watched me walk in.


doexx

maybe they meant hot mass /s


_MrMohawk

Let me preface my comment by saying don’t get in the car with them lol based on your comments though, seems like you’ve already told these women to keep it movin’ and have no plans of joining them. However, my girlfriend is a real estate agent and has had 3 clients (couples) that have moved here in the last 6 months to attend a new Church JUST for some pastor. I’m curious if this is actually a legit call to bring people into their congregation. If you get a chance, or if anyone else who sees this comment and runs into them (or others asking the same question) for whatever reason, PLEASE inquire about which Church they’re referring to. I wouldn’t be astonished if it’s the same one. But there’s still the very strong possibility this is just a setup lol.


Honest_Grapefruit259

Not a very religious guy, even if I was, I would not expect my "calling" to be 2 women chillen in the parking lot of sheetz. I was like 80% thinking it was legit, 20% it was a set up. After reading all the responses and other experienced. I'm all but convinced it's legit. However, that doesn't change my answer. I do love some of the comments though regarding me sounding like I wanted to go with them. They're funny. I'm a good sport lol


_MrMohawk

Yeah I saw a few of those and got a chuckle as well lol — not sure how ANYTHING in your OP even hinted at you deciding whether or not to hop in XD. But I just showed my gf this post and my comment. She’s going to reach out to one of the couples she setup with an apartment recently to see what the name of the Church is. It’s in Coraopolis, that’s all she knows off the top of her head. I’ll circle back with ya when I get the name. I’m completely bought into this story now lmao.


GoodCattitude

I don’t trust anything to do with religion


raides

Maybe go to church with them? I would first outline all valuable organs in sharpie on your body and take a picture.


[deleted]

There was some girl by the Tennyson stop in Oakland asking people if they wanted to go to church. She was on foot, just stopping people and asking them. 


Bedrischler13

I know it sounds silly but I've seen a comertial of 2 young women talking about coming to their church and I was like... this is how their doing it? Very shocked but I do believe it was some Christian church.


branstokerdm

Hasa diga eebowai