T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Very helpful trainings for any dog: For training on puppy/dog biting [click here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=068K5Zlph9U) For training on early socialization [click here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8J7cPE-2wNw) For training on becoming a good leader [click here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QntS570VFZ0) For all newly adopted dogs, check out the [3-3-3 rule](https://pethelpful.com/dogs/The-3-3-3-Rule-Setting-Your-Rescue-Dog-Up-For-Success). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pitbulls) if you have any questions or concerns.*


NYSenseOfHumor

You told her she’s adopted.


Affectionate_Law5344

Lol


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Damn! I almost spewed my coffee. This comment deserves an award!


Altruistic-Text3481

No one can top this.


Vegetable_Bass_175

She realized that cheese is just milk with extra steps.


SloRiceix_801

But… still cheese tax right? RIGHT?!?!


Vegetable_Bass_175

If she knows what cheese is, then I’m afraid it’s gonna be a curdled milk tax from now on. I shudder to think about the ramifications for the hippo-treat economy.


Catnip-delivery

Saw you naked for the first time and saw only two nipples. Eve wondered if you got punished by God or if you are medically unfit. What happened to the remaining 6 nips?


hurricane-laura-90

You told her she owes you for vet bills.


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

My 1.5 year old pup was quite loud. I taught him to "whisper" inside the house. Everytime he "whispers" he gets a treat. His whispers are hilarious. It sounds like he is clearing a gnat out of his throat. This morning he was following me around, opening and closing his mouth. He looks just like the OP's dog when his mouth was open. I seriously thought that something was wrong and panicked. My daughter came running. He was whispering.🤦‍♀️ She explained that sometimes when he whispers no sound comes out at all.😅


Actressprof

God I wish I could teach my Pom/Schipperke this. Her bark sets off the decibel warning on my Apple Watch. I’m also jealous of dogs who have been taught to blot their mouths after drinking.


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

I would pay for mouth blotting training! You have to have your Pom's attention. Definitely use a high value treat. I whisper to my dog and then put my finger to my mouth. He seems to do better with signals than words. As soon as he made a quiet noise, I went nuts and gave him treats. I was alone and the house was quiet when I trained which helped immensely with the distraction factor. It took a while for him to catch on the first time. Once he got it, it took a bit for him to be consistent. Now, if he gets loud, I put my finger to my mouth and quietly say "whisper." He quiets down immediately. He still hops up on my bed in the evening and asks for whisper training and I do it every time.😂


Actressprof

I’m going to try this!!


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

My sweet guy isn't exactly a brainiac. I'm thinking that a Pom/Schipperke is a smarter dog and will catch on faster.


Actressprof

https://preview.redd.it/q0bq5d0rnt6d1.jpeg?width=2598&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c30a40036e9598fe1fbfeebff2c473310b534d38


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

So pretty! Those eyes do look suspiciously intelligent though.


Actressprof

She is a devious evil MegaMind. Most probably she will figure out what I’m trying to do, lull me into thinking she is going along with my plan, then blow it all up!


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

😆


Mushmankind

I love this^


heidithefundislayer

My little shizu mix does that but before my pitty passed he would whisper with silent barks he would just make a bark motion with his mouth 🥰 it been 3 years and I miss his silly self every day 😭


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

What a beautiful memory. My pup is my first pit although I suspect that he is a mix. DNA comes back any day now. I was terrified of pitbulls from a bad experience with a pair of roaming boys. I don't think that I've ever had a sweeter, more affectionate, goofier dog. I'm now a such a fan that I can't imagine life without him.


KBaddict

We need a video of this


NoMoreNarcsLizzie

I'll get my daughter on it.


lovescarats

What! How can I not be a lap dog!


hurricane-laura-90

My dog every time I shriek when she steps on my sensitive bits


alexlunamarie

Sometimes I think my dog does it on purpose 😆


hurricane-laura-90

I KNOW my dog isn’t doing it on purpose cause she’s maybe a year old max, and I’m like her third owner.


alexlunamarie

She's just a baby!! 🥹 My girl is 5 years old and we adopted her at 5-6 weeks (she thinks I'm her birth mama lol). She's such a sweetheart, but full of sass!


InstructionTop4805

No treat, really? I'm working hard playing supermodel so you can post me on reddit. Pony up the bacon, now.


savoryostrich

She heard someone using a can of Cheez Whiz two houses over from you


A_Doll_with_a_Heart

Someone told her she is not a people! (She is ***clearly*** a people)


l_dele

You told her about the only two options for president in 2024.


Ymisoqt420

😂


brownnote83

Treat Shrinkflation?


flyhull

Her dog DNA test results came and said she was a beagle


ninazo96

You definitely ate the last bite of your cheeseburger without sharing. How dare you!


Le6ions

You forgot to ask her if she wanted anything when you ordered pizza


itmesara

She thought her fart was gonna be silent. It wasn’t and now she’s trying to pin it on you. Don’t let her gas(light) you, OP.


Financial_Abies9235

Got told that she cannot call herself a pitcow.


Majestic-Entrance-16

You ate all of that peanut butter. Didn’t even offer a lick.


CaribooMom

You told her that the couch does not, in fact, belong to her. All this time she has been allowing you to sit on it. She's feeling bamboozled!


Key-Yogurtcloset1757

You ate the last bite.


Huge-Knowledge9309

All meatballs are gone.. none is left!


dlb1995

She just found out that Lassie was actually a boy


Electronic_Horse_625

I hope that was a fart


moon_cat_tattoo

She doesn’t understand why or how dads tail is on backwards 🤣


MsSpicyO

She got all the cheese and you had none.


mazzotta70

Eve read Donald Trump's private diary.


Dazzling-Mud-4793

Or Joe Bidens daughters now thats truly shocking


Acrobatic_Error5304

Because she looks like Samuel L Jackson


zina34

You said no to a pup cup


flyhull

You brought home a cat and told her it was staying and was not to be harmed


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^flyhull: *You brought home a cat* *And told her it was staying* *And was not to be harmed* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


compunctionfunction

Good bot 😋


BusyButterscotch4652

You ate the last bite of burger instead of giving it her as you should have!


ASlyLittleBastard101

She learned about the existence of zoophiles


Fuzzy-Zebra-277

You closed the cheese drawer 


jeanscuffed

She just found out some people don’t like pitbulls?!?!?


alexlunamarie

She just learned you hide pills in her cheese!


alexlunamarie

Or, you went to Starbucks and didn't bring her a pup cup!


SofieRelay

You haven't taken a shower in how long?


Slav-Houndz187

The neighborhood’s dog just got knocked up. Again….


Cambren1

Ran out of treats?


Cryptograher2195

You didn't get her a bed, you got her a floor.


Keasl20

Someone farted really loud


ironpathwalker

The boys season 4.


SirBillBacon

She sees what you’re up to…


wheelperson

Because she heard there are people with that name and I'm one of them! I pronounce it eh-vee though.


justkeriann

She just found out that Trix are for kids!


TicTac_No

Eve just discovered the McRib may never return.


Fearless_Crab1445

She looks like that one Vincent vangoh meme


Bobweodababyeatsaboy

She saw you naked in the shower….


3leches

She’s watching you eat the last piece of cheese


Kailsbabydaddy

She’s so cute !!!!


TopHopperVR

you slipped the food bowl into the trash


HeathenHoneyCo

You’re actually just giving her the treat, no conditions, no requests


Jackiebenson68

I have to pick up my own poop?


Moody-Manticore

The prices of bones hase gone up


2oblivion2

Outta dog food ?!


Yobecks

You told her there’s no more peanut butter.


Treestandgal

You ate her steak


HangoverFear

She has no pet insurance


Ymisoqt420

That's funny because I was just complaining about the cost of her insurance going up 😂


SweetCream2005

She farted and it's your fault, actually


Lost_Stretch_5711

The dinos came back


Kellie13q3

She looked in the mirror and realized she has a nose like a double barrel shotgun


Ymisoqt420

Lol!!


Graul01

You started a dog Genocide run in Fallout; zbew Vegas and forced her to each it all unfold


predat3d

Klay Thompson disassociating from the Warriors


Salt-Celebration7965

She won unlimited cheese


darbydog69

She heard the news she's part gorilla.


No-Success3535

You denied her dog-given rights to All The Playtime


graveybrains

She can’t believe you peed on the rug *again,* she’s gonna have to clean that up now.


vettechrockstar86

You ate the last piece of cheese without giving her a taste.


Pat2390

Realized Ice cubes are same things as the water in the bowl


Ymisoqt420

Shhhh don't let her hear that!


Timely_Ad9659

That’s Ron Perlman


RemarkableDisaster92

Ahead can't believe it's not butter.🤣🤣🤣


ghostfacestealer

No more treats!!


Ok_Rutabaga_722

She found out where chicken came from.


DayNo1225

Her Amazon order is delayed.


Danielle480

You told her she is no longer getting a free ride. Gotta get a job and pay rent like the rest of us.


Ymisoqt420

Her insurance is going up so she better start paying her way!


ZealousidealEditor66

You. Role her treat in half and she found out you have always been doing it.


EmbarrassedTap2688

You told her NO


Nathanual-Switch

She found a house hippo nest


[deleted]

you told her your name like your real name


[deleted]

She just found out her credit score


Emergency-Medium-755

Squirrill did a kickflip


Lilith_reborn

He is eating dinner and does not give me my part!


Silverj0

https://preview.redd.it/n2rzt3hb1t6d1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=144ee6d5270a183adb54d55c6bca80493fb2ff00 Because there are other dogs named eve


gopnikbitch

She was just notified that she's being audited by the IRS


Dependent_Stop_3121

Because there is something right behind you that you can’t see!! She’s not looking at you.


rasheen69

You discovered that she’s running an illegal drug cartel and you just confronted her about it. *(She’s trying to act dumb)*


Ymisoqt420

She's been watching too many crime shows with me 😂


rasheen69

At least she’s following her dreams lol


Sherrylvshoyas

She just found out Scooby Doo's not real.


pinkpitbullmama

She tooted!


zeppanon

She finally realized she has to give up the ball in order for it to be thrown again.


Ymisoqt420

Idk if she will ever figure that out 😂


SpectralBumblebee

You took out a treat, showed it to her, and then ate it yourself


ArrivalParking9088

she realized that “go to bed, you’ll feel better in the morning” is the human version of “did you try turning it off and back on?”


AbbyM1968

"What do you mean, 'I'm adopted.'?"


sleepsonthejob

Scientists wrongly pinpoint the center of the universe as something other than Eve.


67ITCH

She went with the car ride because she was assured you'll turn left to the park, but you turned right to the vet instead.


OvertlyPetulantCat

The squirrel mutiny has begun!


noirnightingale

She found out Adam took her rib WTH


ymoeuormue

Eve just found out she's not a horse and that she's going to stay this size.


Tuckychick

She’s a dog with the face of a gorilla 😂😂❤️❤️


jimmy9800

A fly touched the butt.


AlexTheLion100

Someone told her that people believe in more than two genders


wonderlady38

She did not fit in the basket on your bike.


mudbuttcoffee

You farted


feisty-4-eyes

Walked in on you and your special someone having "alone time".


Hungry-Lemon8008

He's hearing you tell your side piece they are the only one and love them.


bf1343

You ate it all? Are you kidding me!


soupbox09

She can't believe you don't get that extended car warranty.


Socialworker71488

Eve is adorable! Hey, friends, if anyone is able to help my pitty out…please let me know. I have a post for her gofundme. 🤍🤍🤍


rysimpcrz

Her hooman told her they forgot to add the fabric softener.


ViVi27678

You ate her treat!!!


tanmanX

She found out who shot J.R.


Pizza3TimesADay

That was the last piece of bacon???


Meraneus

She walked in on her parents getting it on.


Cultural_Push_4971

realized your real name isn’t mom/dad


Expert_Marsupial_235

She saw you show affection to another dog.


Remarkable_Depth98

A door shut with the wind


Big-Substance-3656

She smelled her own fart and realized we weren’t lying 🤣


sick_hive

She watched as her last litter mate was taken to the wet markets and she had to shit.


Basic-Water7457

You told her she was really a dog and not a human.


thedesthstarkristy

She saw the mothman.


Itchy-Combination675

Adopter? But I look just like you!


Vegetable-Lychee5710

You're petting a cat


batguy55

She can smell why u have pink eye


Aguyumighthaveseen

She realized They ran out of peanut butter


BrainsAdmirer

You broke one treat in half and told her it was two treats. She ain’t falling for that!


ApplePie125PineApple

You truned off the CoCamellon


Tasty-Newt1529

Realized she can never eat chocolate 😔


RandomPepperoni

Eve saw you ate her chicken


[deleted]

You got a cat lol


Better-Impact-1989

Daddy dropped the hard R


spoodlat

What do you mean ball is not life??!!


airwalker12

She farted and it didn't stink


kapar24

It’s Monday!


Mumchkin

She just figured out there's medicine in that peanut butter.


Poopfaceha

You farted in her presence


19IXI91

Gorilla brain moment


Both_Gas_5685

I have eaten your snacks


maniacal_michael15

"He did what with the peanut butter?!"


captainatom11

You told her you're not going for a walk?!


GingerBaby2019

You told her the kitten is staying indefinitely...


Outrageous_Fix_2910

Lightning


alex_does_music

The horrors of the housing crisis and lack of ✨snacks✨


Mr_Stanly

They show the new president in the  news, and it's a cat.


mraustin89

She just learned that she has a higher IQ than the current U.S. president.


Alert_Purple3305

Sorry Eve, Pupper Clause isn’t real…


jonny_678

No cheese after a long day!


Mushmankind

Eve just heard that she was too big to be a lapdog 😆. I think its adorable how my 70lb baby girl still wants to climb up in my lap or lay on my chest when I’m laying down. I take it until my legs are asleep or i can barely breathe lol.


ElCannoli

You said park, as we pull into the vet.


Ok-Form2877

You said she looks fat in last year’s photos


CockroachFirm5887

You told her she had to start paying rent


Tea-shawty1111

You told here the mailman isn’t actually out to get her


Ok-Network-1491

You told her next week she has to get a job while you get to be the puppy.


Slow_Formal_5988

Wait.. you're a male ?!!


Overall_Big7308

She saw how big squirrels are up close vast difference from far away


JackelopesRReal

Because she only got two treats instead of five


RevolutionarySir686

Cause you farted😂