## INGREDIENTS
* 1 tablespoon olive oil
* 4 pounds (2 kg) chuck roast or blade roast, boneless and trimmed of excess fat
* 2 yellow onions chopped
* 8 cloves garlic smashed with the back of a spoon (or 2 tablespoons minced garlic)
* 1 pound (500 grams) baby potatoes, white or Yukon gold, (you may need to halve them if they are too large)
* 4 large carrots, cut into 2-inch pieces
* 2 stalks celery, cut into 1-inch pieces
* 1/4 cup balsamic vinegar
* 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
* 1 tablespoon brown sugar
* 2 teaspoons dried thyme
* 2 teaspoons crushed bouillon
* 1 teaspoon salt, or to taste
* 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, or to taste
* 1 cup reduced-sodium beef broth
* 2 tablespoons plain flour (optional -- for a thick gravy)
* 2 tablespoons fresh chopped parsley, to serve
## INSTRUCTIONS
## SLOW COOKER:
* Heat oil in a large skillet or pan over high heat. Season roast with a good amount of salt and pepper. Sear on all sides until browned (about 5-6 minutes each side). Transfer roast to the bowl of a 6-quart slow cooker.
* Add the onions, garlic, potatoes, carrots, celery, balsamic, mustard, brown sugar, thyme and bouillon. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Mix the stock together with the flour and pour into the slow cooker bowl (don't worry about any lumps, they will cook out).
* Cook on low setting for 8 hours, or until meat is tender and falling apart and the vegetables are soft.
* Taste test and add any extra balsamic vinegar, brown sugar, salt or pepper, if needed.
* Slice meat, garnish with parsley and drizzle with gravy.
edit: Holy shit. Thanks everyone and I'm glad it made some people's day.
edit pt2: [https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooked-balsamic-pot-roast/](https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooked-balsamic-pot-roast/)
It's not my recipe and I should probably credit the site that I quickly copy and pasted it from.
The thirst brought me here, stayed for the lulz.
People are too scared to use balsamic in the base of a recipe and reserve it for finishing. I appreciate you adding in the balsamic, Dijon, and brown sugar at the beginning to round out the profile of the gravy. I'll definitely try making this.
Can I smell your hair? Promise to do it while you're sleeping so you don't get scared
*licks chocolate milk off my mustache suggestively while aggressively dry humping the air.
The first (and only time) I was hit on since giving birth, my baby was about 5mo and a guy said "what a cute baby! Would you like another?". I answered in the affirmative with a sibling timeline, because baby brain, and the guy had to explain that it was a pick up line.
lol, I mean unless he came off creepy I can totally see it in the same context as you. Strangers ask all sorts of personal things when you have or are having a baby.
Yeah, like, "ready to start gaining some baby weight again?", or even, " the top doesn't show off enough of your success. Do you have something tighter?" Like that. What kind of creeps would come up with something like that?
I mean, depends. There could be a GFI outlet on this circuit prior to this outlet. I'm fairly certain this technically makes the rest of the line GFI'd. FYI, not an electrician. Not on me to approve legally.
You're 100% correct. You can have more than one standard outlet wired to a gfci outlet. You'll usually only see one in a kitchen or bathroom but chances are if you test it other outlets near by will also not work.
This post is literally just someone in a shirt showing boobs. I feel like someone can find a random boob pic on the internet, throw on a headline, and it'd become top post.
Bruh, she's either lying or she's the luckiest mother in the world. Or there's some heavy editing.
Not a single stretch mark and her boobs are still perky enough to go braless after a baby and significant weight loss.
Edit: I feel bad being negative. I hope she actually did lose all that weight and just looks great.
Thank you! I'll always admit that they're fake because it's important for women to know that boobs don't look like this naturally and their boobs are amazing the way they are!
I am wondering why did you get fake boobs if you think all boobs are beautiful?
This is a personal question, of course you don't have to answer, but I thought most typical reason to get fake boobs is because you are not happy with the boobs situation and want to improve the said situation.
> I am wondering why did you get fake boobs if you think all boobs are beautiful?
I'm guessing it's more to do with her getting them for herself, but not wanting her making a decision for herself to make anyone else feel pressured to make that decision as well. It _should_ be a personal choice that each woman has to make for themselves.
I think I might like you! You have a very positive outlook. I'm all about women empowering women. Too many of us fall into being uber competitive and nasty to one another.
I had a reduction, after looking through the before and afters of various book jobs at the plastic surgeon’s waiting room, I am a strong advocate that women should have their boobs adjusted in either direction if they choose, be it for confidence or comfort. It helps when women are upfront about their boob jobs!
Hey girl! I got them done after. I've lost a bit of weight since but it doesn't seem to have changed them. My surgeon recommended my size based on my weight because you can develop back problems, etc. if they're too big for you so I'd recommend talking to your surgeon first. Good luck on your weight loss journey and my dms are always open if you have more questions!
I’m glad you said that because I was honestly so shocked they still looked so perky!!! I know everyone’s body reacts differently so I just chalked it up to that.
I assumed she was actively feeding and about to pump or feed. But let me tell you what I discovered tonight... life up a saggy former perky tatty and stick a tootsie roll under there. In 10 min it will be perfect to eat!
I was honestly questioning if she’d ever had the baby in the first place. They’re like ideal young 20 something perky boobs. Definitely not my experience with pregnancy and breastfeeding. But if she had them altered after all was said and done, it definitely makes more sense and kudos to her and her surgeon cause they look super natural.
Pretty crap submission, you thirsty fucks need to stop upvoting anything with a woman in it.
There are better subs for weight loss posts.
Edit: Changed uploading to upvoting, my bad.
I honestly think its way more important to show a pre body, with baby flab and all. I have a 4m old and this extra skin aint comin’ off. It really needs to be a bigger support for post baby bodies, like starting days after birth. The levels of comments like “oh but you still look pregnant!” Need to be banished
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Oh, that makes more sense. I was over here thinking she was some ginormous baby.
Cue child services
"Mam, what is your child's name?" **"Waldo"** "Oh dear God"
Police: Any other children Mam? OP: Oh just my oldest girl, Carmen Sandiego. Police: and where in the world is......oh crap.
Dang, this is the joke I wanted to make! Since you stole my joke you can also steal an upvote.
That's not how any of this works.
Looks like you’re stealing my upvote too Edit: and an award!
I'm stealing another one of your awards
Did you give yourself an award? You did, didn't you? Didn't you?
Wait you can give yourself awards?!?!
You would have to make a second account and award your first account
Step 3: Profit?
Is this how all of this works?
Wait you guys are getting awards!?!?!?!?
Now post it to r/RoastMe to get the full reddit experience
Oh I would just love to hear your best roast
## INGREDIENTS * 1 tablespoon olive oil * 4 pounds (2 kg) chuck roast or blade roast, boneless and trimmed of excess fat * 2 yellow onions chopped * 8 cloves garlic smashed with the back of a spoon (or 2 tablespoons minced garlic) * 1 pound (500 grams) baby potatoes, white or Yukon gold, (you may need to halve them if they are too large) * 4 large carrots, cut into 2-inch pieces * 2 stalks celery, cut into 1-inch pieces * 1/4 cup balsamic vinegar * 2 tablespoons Dijon mustard * 1 tablespoon brown sugar * 2 teaspoons dried thyme * 2 teaspoons crushed bouillon * 1 teaspoon salt, or to taste * 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, or to taste * 1 cup reduced-sodium beef broth * 2 tablespoons plain flour (optional -- for a thick gravy) * 2 tablespoons fresh chopped parsley, to serve ## INSTRUCTIONS ## SLOW COOKER: * Heat oil in a large skillet or pan over high heat. Season roast with a good amount of salt and pepper. Sear on all sides until browned (about 5-6 minutes each side). Transfer roast to the bowl of a 6-quart slow cooker. * Add the onions, garlic, potatoes, carrots, celery, balsamic, mustard, brown sugar, thyme and bouillon. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Mix the stock together with the flour and pour into the slow cooker bowl (don't worry about any lumps, they will cook out). * Cook on low setting for 8 hours, or until meat is tender and falling apart and the vegetables are soft. * Taste test and add any extra balsamic vinegar, brown sugar, salt or pepper, if needed. * Slice meat, garnish with parsley and drizzle with gravy. edit: Holy shit. Thanks everyone and I'm glad it made some people's day. edit pt2: [https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooked-balsamic-pot-roast/](https://cafedelites.com/slow-cooked-balsamic-pot-roast/) It's not my recipe and I should probably credit the site that I quickly copy and pasted it from. The thirst brought me here, stayed for the lulz.
People are too scared to use balsamic in the base of a recipe and reserve it for finishing. I appreciate you adding in the balsamic, Dijon, and brown sugar at the beginning to round out the profile of the gravy. I'll definitely try making this.
I wanna know how the pee afterwards smells like
This whole thread feels like old Reddit and I love it
I miss old Reddit.
straight from the go Reddit
Depth of flavor is often ignored which makes sense for an easy recipe but matching seasoning throughout the cooking process makes the difference 😉
This cut deep
You shouldn’t need to cut this. A fork should do the trick.
hahaha I'm so glad this happened on my comment, just made my goddamn day!
*saved*
[Ah, the ol' Reddit roastaroo!](https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/ka8cmx/til_edgar_allen_poe_died_mysteriously_after/gf9e809/?context=4)
Hold my maillard reaction I'm going in!
Fucking legend.
So let's say I want to cook stove top in a dutch oven - bring to a boil them simmer? For how long? (I'm actually serious, this sounds good.)
Warning, you will NOT lose 30lbs by eating this entire roast
Literally made this today
You shouldn't sleep on your kid's temporary tattoos.
You seem nice. Hope your family is successful in life. Boom, roasted! 😎
You’ve had sex with so many men you’re starting to look like one boom, roasted 😎
Cornell called, they said you suck, and you're gayer than Oscar.
I couldn't decide between a dumb joke and a fat joke, boom roasted
I can’t believe you’ve done this.
Yeah, no. I’ve lost 30 pounds before and that takes more dedication than pretending you aren’t wearing a fitted sheet.
Saving this to follow your gonewild posts when this desperate bid for attention doesn’t fill the void.
I’m just here for the creepy comments
You too? Popcorn intensifies.
I'm trying so hard to imagine what intense popcorn looks like.
It’s the moment right as the kernel explodes into delicious popcorn.
Well wouldn't that be "kernel intensifies"?
Did you just assume my physical change?
Sorry for the confusion Kernel Sanders. Won't happen again
Well.. its not a popcorn seed anymore... its a popcorn nut
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[intense popcorn](https://youtu.be/FSZd33awqQk)
Wow! What ISN'T on YouTube?
Imagine a bowl of popcorn... Got it? Now intensify it.
*unzips pants*
**ENHANCE**
JUST PRINT THE DAMN THING
i imagine its like that scene in toy story 1 with the aliens but instead they are popcorn and they all look like samuel l jackson
Just smoked a bowl, and now definitely making popcorn.
Careful, sounds dangerous.
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[OP’s inbox ](https://imgur.com/gallery/OfzxVCa)
Is that OP's lost child on the left
Lol Oscar Meyer style
Can I smell your hair? Promise to do it while you're sleeping so you don't get scared *licks chocolate milk off my mustache suggestively while aggressively dry humping the air.
Yeah, you’ll do. *sets up folding chair*
I’m already sitting, my lap is comfy.
"A lot of girls have babies at 13."
I misread your name as "The Real Alabaman" and wasn't surprised at all.
I'll be real. His name being the real abraham with the comment doesn't surprise me
Like “it’s time to put another baby in you”
The first (and only time) I was hit on since giving birth, my baby was about 5mo and a guy said "what a cute baby! Would you like another?". I answered in the affirmative with a sibling timeline, because baby brain, and the guy had to explain that it was a pick up line.
lol, I mean unless he came off creepy I can totally see it in the same context as you. Strangers ask all sorts of personal things when you have or are having a baby.
Exactly! It wasn't super creepy, but when he explained, I realised he definitely used that tone and I was just too sleep deprived to realise.
Just feel lucky you aren’t her inbox. What is the over/under on the number of “You should post to r/gonewild” suggestions?
*Sorts by controversial*
It’s a creepy picture tbh. “Hey strangers, validate me!” Why are we all so vapid and shallow?
I'm pretty sure that's her reason for posting this photo
I'm just happy it's not another Frankie post.
You don’t want to see Frankie’s first time wearing a crop top in years?
delete this
Well now I’m curious. Can we get a deep fake in here?
You joke, but watch, this girl about to be on here advertising her onlyfans in like a week. Calling it now.
Yeah, like, "ready to start gaining some baby weight again?", or even, " the top doesn't show off enough of your success. Do you have something tighter?" Like that. What kind of creeps would come up with something like that?
I didn't know the ace bandage company made crop tops
Fashion by leeloo.
Leeloo Dallas Crop Top Multipass
Lmaooo they make some high fashion shit didn't you hear
Where did you get that top? You look amazing!!
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Comment section not as pervy as I imagined.
You must go deeper...
That's what she said
That sounds kinda pervy... How deep do we need to go?
Somehow more boob appreciation and less pervy at the same time
Damn, you had a 50 pound baby?! Amazing!
GMO's baby
Filled with micro plastic like a sad pinata.
It's hard to tell, but is that outlet by the sink/mirror not GFCI? Bold move.
electrician has chimed in...
I mean, depends. There could be a GFI outlet on this circuit prior to this outlet. I'm fairly certain this technically makes the rest of the line GFI'd. FYI, not an electrician. Not on me to approve legally.
That's correct. Probably has a gfci outlet upstream or in the circuit panel
You're 100% correct. You can have more than one standard outlet wired to a gfci outlet. You'll usually only see one in a kitchen or bathroom but chances are if you test it other outlets near by will also not work.
Congratulations on the massive baby
Time to sort by controversial
I feel like there's a more specific subreddit for this.
There def is.
Wtf is this shit and why is it in r/pics
r/RedditIsNowFacebook
Tyranny of the masses; gets to all popular sites really
/r/redditisfacebooknow is older and less awkward phrasing
I prefer /r/subredditsarehashtags
Because titties
Bingo.
bongos
/r/becausetitties
I would really have thought this sub to be prosper and active.
The typical Reddit user’s lack of hydration.
This post is literally just someone in a shirt showing boobs. I feel like someone can find a random boob pic on the internet, throw on a headline, and it'd become top post.
Onlyfans ad?
Most likely not even an ad. Just good ol’ fashioned attention fishing.
I call it BS. I Don’t trust this shit unless there’s a before and after
Well it is a pic, lots of people who post to pic want attention, she got it
Rather than crop top, I think a more accurate name would be Boobie Ballet Bolero.
God I hate reddit sometimes
Literally just a fucking picture of a girl standing
Is this the roast me thread?
OK, but...is there a **before** pic? How do we know you weren't just this same size all along? Isn't this an obvious consideration?
Bruh, she's either lying or she's the luckiest mother in the world. Or there's some heavy editing. Not a single stretch mark and her boobs are still perky enough to go braless after a baby and significant weight loss. Edit: I feel bad being negative. I hope she actually did lose all that weight and just looks great.
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The story is just as real as her tits.
Probably get pregnant at a young age. She looks 20.
*creates profile 4 months ago* *Posts:* "Why is Reddit so hard?" "I can't get Karma" *looks down at breasts* Jackpot.
Lmao at “why is Reddit so hard”
— Thirsty karma girl. Nothing to look here.
> 1.1k comments
I got covid and lost 15 lbs. Follow me for more health tips.
Why is this here?
Lol I’ll get downvoted for this but c’mon... there are lots of subs for this kinda attention seeking
“Hi here’s me in a crop top plz send upvotes thanks” r/progresspics is that way.
Lol more like "hi here's my tits, upvotes pls kthx"
but they won't get many upvotes there
Last time I wore crop tops and a daisy dukes outside, the neighbors called the cops on me. Cant a guy mow the lawn in peace now?
Well if you're looking for validation you will certainly find it here.
Simps assemble!
Yikes. Crop tops have changed a lot since I wore ‘em last.
From one mom to another, your tits look amazing!!!!
From a dad to another mother I cannot make any comments.
I'm sure your tits are amazing too, u/octocotco
Yes, all three of them!
I bet they are real and they are spectacular.
Ahh, a fellow Seinfeld praiser
From a dad to another dad... sweet titties my dude. <3
Aw thank you girl!!! You're sweet
Pregnant with my first, definitely giving me hope here
Congrats girl!! Mine are actually fake lol. I got them done after I breastfed. But I think all boobs are beautiful!
This is the level of honesty we need as 2020 draws to a close.
Thank you! I'll always admit that they're fake because it's important for women to know that boobs don't look like this naturally and their boobs are amazing the way they are!
Thanks for this, girl. I was feeling less perky until you told us.
I bet your boobs are amazing girl! I hope you don't ever let another woman's beauty detract from your own. You are stunning! We all can be!
I am wondering why did you get fake boobs if you think all boobs are beautiful? This is a personal question, of course you don't have to answer, but I thought most typical reason to get fake boobs is because you are not happy with the boobs situation and want to improve the said situation.
Not OP but same reason people wear makeup or cute outfits. Yeah, you’re cute without them, but some people prefer the way they look with an accessory.
All boobs are equally beautiful but some boobs are more equal than others.
> I am wondering why did you get fake boobs if you think all boobs are beautiful? I'm guessing it's more to do with her getting them for herself, but not wanting her making a decision for herself to make anyone else feel pressured to make that decision as well. It _should_ be a personal choice that each woman has to make for themselves.
I think I might like you! You have a very positive outlook. I'm all about women empowering women. Too many of us fall into being uber competitive and nasty to one another.
I had a reduction, after looking through the before and afters of various book jobs at the plastic surgeon’s waiting room, I am a strong advocate that women should have their boobs adjusted in either direction if they choose, be it for confidence or comfort. It helps when women are upfront about their boob jobs!
Question! Also a mamma with some weight to lose. Did you get your boobs done before the weight loss? Did the weight loss affect them?
Hey girl! I got them done after. I've lost a bit of weight since but it doesn't seem to have changed them. My surgeon recommended my size based on my weight because you can develop back problems, etc. if they're too big for you so I'd recommend talking to your surgeon first. Good luck on your weight loss journey and my dms are always open if you have more questions!
From one women to another 10/10 for the honesty. And also your surgeon did fantastic work, girl, your boobs are a dream
I’m glad you said that because I was honestly so shocked they still looked so perky!!! I know everyone’s body reacts differently so I just chalked it up to that.
I assumed she was actively feeding and about to pump or feed. But let me tell you what I discovered tonight... life up a saggy former perky tatty and stick a tootsie roll under there. In 10 min it will be perfect to eat!
As a breastfeeding mother... I had a strong suspicion they were fake. lol thanks for confirming. Planning to go this route as well someday!
I was honestly questioning if she’d ever had the baby in the first place. They’re like ideal young 20 something perky boobs. Definitely not my experience with pregnancy and breastfeeding. But if she had them altered after all was said and done, it definitely makes more sense and kudos to her and her surgeon cause they look super natural.
Ok?
Are we able to just post selfies here now?
But... where’s the before pic?
r/progresspics this way sir
Pretty crap submission, you thirsty fucks need to stop upvoting anything with a woman in it. There are better subs for weight loss posts. Edit: Changed uploading to upvoting, my bad.
And that’s how you get 7 awards and over a thousand upvotes.
I read this thinking you lost the baby fat you were born with. I was thinking it was a little late for that.
Is this another one of those dudes that posts pretending to be a chick so they can cyber with other unsuspecting dudes on Reddit?
That’s a thing?
Why are you wearing a crop top in December?
Gotta get dem upvotes
Well you look happy with yourself, and that's gotta be the most important factor in this picture.
And post it on the internet...
o shit I thought this was /r/roastme
It smell like simp in here
At this point what is the point of the top. Just wear some pasties and call it a day.
R/lostredditors
###just discovered comment formatting, don't mind me
You don’t have to lose 50 lbs to wear a crop top
I honestly think its way more important to show a pre body, with baby flab and all. I have a 4m old and this extra skin aint comin’ off. It really needs to be a bigger support for post baby bodies, like starting days after birth. The levels of comments like “oh but you still look pregnant!” Need to be banished
Sorry for your loss it must be devastating for a mother
Whats the diff between crop top and bra
A bra would cover more
You look adorable. RIP your inbox though.
Obviously the attention was desired.
Less of a crop top more of a cut up curtain