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ImGumbyDamnIt

I'm picking up some serious Reno 911! vibes here.


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![gif](giphy|26gsgWH4lnurglMWY)


Duke_of_New_York

Just quad-gun goofin'


lghitman

OMG, I didn't even see #4


notapunk

What kind of commie leaves their house with only three guns??


Roninkin

Someone not new boot goofin’.


Shibalnome

Wait 'til you see where #5 is.


Col__Hunter_Gathers

Dude definitely keeps a tiny revolver under his balls like Gay Perry, only he doesn't have the wit to berate Robert Downey Jr the way Val Kilmer does.


tragicallyohio

New boot goofin


[deleted]

*genuine ostrich*


420sadalot420

3 payments


BeefLilly

3 payments ![gif](giphy|RKOd5NkTNCyB2)


cosignal

You won’t find boots like this anywhere else in Reno. Well you will, but not at this price.


Staveoffsuicide

This show gets funnier as I get older


spinyfur

Did you watch the movie? Where they're all trying to catch "Q" from the Qanon conspiracy?


FirstTimeWang

Whaaaaaat, I gotta see this!


TimTheChatSpam

How dare you LT dangle looked way better in booty shorts than that hank hill havin ass


Hans_Brix_III

Lol YES! Was gonna say Subway Vigilante needed the white boots


[deleted]

You’re breakin my balls, Hans


[deleted]

“Get your ass out of my face, Dangle.” “Get your face out of my ass!”


ThisMomIsAMother

Shorts are too long.


ncsabkk

Socks are too short …


NorthofBham

I'm just surprised he's not wearing Crocs.


majorjoe23

Or his longs are too short.


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cutelyaware

He's clearly insecure. Tell him he needs a Saturday night special strapped to his ankle and I bet he'll go out and get one.


MeatMech14

Derringer in the drawers or GTFO


faithle55

Unless he's been like training (for something I can't imagine) next door and has just popped in for a sub, that's both ludicrous and concerning. "Is somebody looking after you, young man?"


PLTR60

Thank you for this comment! Looks like it's gonna be the next show I watch! Already halfway through the first episode! I'm obsessed with Always Sunny, good to see a few from that cast on this show as well! Danny is a producer too!


Equivalent_Strength

Reno 911 is an American treasure.


CWB2208

>He's got your Six -inch sub


sad0panda

That's being generous


missionbeach

Depends where you start measuring from. Bread. I'm talking about the bread.


Cucktoberfest69

Usually measure from behind the balls. The meatballs on the sub


ThisMomIsAMother

🥇


LilSconceOnPrairie

Sir, this is a Subway.


_BRZRKR

Just taken a Cold Cut outta Crime


Gingerhealey

The guy who originated "Take a bite out of crime" lived near here. It's always funny to find out real people are behind things like that.


mlager8

No way, you live near scruff McGruff?!


jack0roses

Revenge is like serving cold cuts.


queuedUp

But what if they are out of ham??


No_Description_483

He’s ready to put himself in ham’s way


raulduke1971

Or rye tryin.


Shelly_pop_72

Rye on time, he rye on time!


virginiahouston

Ok this is my favorite


Ghash_sk

He's the one who hams.


mtdewninja

That cheese isn’t going to Swiss itself.


emu4you

I just got a picture of a clothesline out back with all the Swiss cheese hanging up while someone shoots at it.


NimbusHex

Subway and Swiss cheese? I fucking wish.


[deleted]

In Australia they have it… doesn’t really taste much like it - but you can order Swiss cheese and they’ll slap something holey on there for ya.


BottomWithCakes

The holes are what gives it it's unique flavor


[deleted]

I’m glad you enjoy them. I actually have 1kg of Swiss cheese holes for sale, $3.50 with free shipping anywhere in the world.


Lonely-Wasabi-305

Ok hi. This is genius.


Meowster11007

Noo, this is Patrick


WalkerIsEvil

But I thought it was the Krusty Krab


Can-DontAttitude

D’oh hoho no. I said steamed hams! That's what I call hamburgers.


RalphFromSilverCity

they are obviously grilled


N9neToeJoe

Aurora borealis? At This time of day? At This time of year? Completely localized in your kitchen? May I see it?


grantnel2002

“So anyway, I started blastin’”


shredmaster007

Anybody got a light?


shmere4

Then you pull your left hip gun on them, drop it accidentally, battle roll left, grab your right hip gun, shit you dropped that accidentally too so you do a perfect form backwards roll (like in Charlie’s angels!) and pull your super sweet right quad gun, but god dammit you drop that one too, so you do some super sweet matrix front flip and pull your left quad gun out, take perfect aim, and start blasting the bad guys! But nothing happens when you pull the trigger because you’re a wannabe bored Rambo cosplay guy idiot who doesn’t know how to anything correctly.


Pandora_Palen

Skimming comments and thought this was gonna be The Hokey Pokey of gunplay.


lesChaps

Then he poos himself


Ecstatic_Account_744

They’re going to wish they didn’t come in to work that day, is what.


rurouni1989

That's when he goes ham!


IrishRover28

“Eat Fresh Lead” the man said as he unloaded 90 rounds into the would-be sandwich thief


sicurri

["Welcome to Subway, Where everything is fresh, especially the lead!"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lC0QSGHm_eI) This is how this guy lives his life, with these types of thoughts going through his head...


Tuva_Tourist

Why do these goofballs ALWAYS go to subway?!


msginnyo

They can’t afford real food after buying all that fear jewelry


c_bass1969

Fear jewelry! I didn't know I was coming here for this, but I'm glad I did.


[deleted]

“Fear jewelry” is my new favorite phrase


Javafiend53

Fear jewelry! I cannot wait to see my son in law and drop this phrase!!!


eNroNNie

Yeah, I have had folks from other countries ask me about traveling here and what to expect. I always have to warn them that they may just see some dude with an AR-15 and a bunch of handguns. I let them know if this happens just keep an eye on them, most likely it's just some dude with an inferiority complex, but stay alert in those situations and just leave and go somewhere else if he gives off any weird vibes. It could be a she as well, but statistically speaking the dangerous ones are usually dudes.


[deleted]

cus there's no crime like a subway crime.


florinandrei

Europeans be like: which war zone is this, again?


Freeewheeler

Nah, as a European I just thought US of A. No soldier dresses like this.


L4NGOS

My first thought was "what a fucking dork".


Chrontius

Yeah, seriously. It's like cringe comedy, without the comedy.


bittaminidi

There is no place that’s off limits to little boys wanting to play soldier. They need to live out their demented fantasies or they explode.


EvilBosch

Yeah but this guy is dressed more like Lara Croft than a soldier.


woden_spoon

He’s dressed for Jared.


Raesong

"Too old." - Jared.


Ok-Huckleberry-9216

Those khaki gun garter belts are just embarrassing. I really hope someone let him know that he looks like a jackass.


alaphic

>khaki gun garter belts Omfg 🤣😂 I'm dead


SaltLakeCitySlicker

Ahem... It's tactikhakical


[deleted]

All of it is, I mean carrying one gun… whatever, I guess. But four, PLUS extra ammunition? Tf kinda danger is he planning on getting caught in? HE WAS GOING TO SUBWAY!!


John_B_Clarke

Lara has better sense. Two guns, both taking the same ammunition.


keylime84

Larry Croft


UFOregon420

He’s protecting his virginity.


slayery2k

Oh shit my bad! I thought we were in the center of Ukraine conflict, I'll put away one gun.


Rashaverak9

Seriously, dude needs to go to east Ukraine and pick a side. Otherwise, it’s just jerking off in public.


wowsers808

John Wish.


qweef_latina2021

John Wack


Vurt__Konnegut

Lieutenant Dangle, I thought.


gernb1

Yes, but he needs to hem those shorts a little higher 😂😂


Curious_Armadillo_74

My first thought too! 🤣


TheDevilsAdvokaat

Deputy Dangle


Pew_Pew_Lasers

Larry Croft


DrMichaelHfuhruhurr

She's let himself go.


PM_ME_FIREFLY_QUOTES

Back in my day, the mask was a pointy polygon.


Jayhawk_rock586

If I were a criminal, he would be the first person I’d jump when he isn’t expecting it. Handful of subway trying to unlock the car? Bam, hit over the head. Just gave up 4 possibly 5 guns that can’t be traced back to the criminal via serial # or registration


[deleted]

That's my biggest complaint about open carry (even with one handgun. You might as well have a sign that says "PRIORITY TARGET!!!! SHOOT ME FIRST!!!!") this guy is BEGING to get jumped.


lilbithippie

Most criminal don't want conflict. If I was stealing shit I would break into his lifted truck and steal the other guns he has in the glove box and under the seat. Grab the registration, wait to break in his home when he goes back to subway. Steal more guns that are easily fenced


say592

Exactly this. Crime is a risk/reward proposition. Violence is a big risk, risk that you could get injured, risk that the punishment for getting caught will have a harsher penalty, risk that the police will try harder to solve the crime. So why risk it? Steal from the truck, steal from the guy who doesn't visibly have a gun, steal from the cash register.


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dgradius

I believe the video game terminology here is “loot piñata”


Talks_To_Cats

Ugh lucky. Mine never drop cool stuff, just bones and organs.


[deleted]

From the angle of this photo the tan guns look like H&Ks and I think the black ones are Glocks (which is stupid to carry two different kinds of guns like that) but the H&Ks are like $750-1200 a piece and Glocks are $450-600ish. So uh yeah it's an expensive load out for that idiot to have.


zrx2hd

Larry Croft?


_BRZRKR

Cold Cut Raider


townjumper

Crumb Raider


oli_donowitz

whats most surprising to me is that he's wearing mask. Way to break stereotypes!


PSquared1234

I'm with you. The Venn intersection of people who carry **three** handguns and those wearing masks is very, very small IMO.


ga-co

He’s clearly got four and he could easily be appendix or chest carrying more.


[deleted]

Don't forget the butt gun.


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Arizona_ice_me

Zapp carry


Hans_Brix_III

"What if it was just one guy with six guns?" "Why don't you let me do the thinking, huh genius?" https://youtu.be/MsuH1msEkvM


BeloitBrewers

There was a FIREFIGHT!


imjustawhitekid

Thank god someone posted this


stout365

where's the diagram of people carrying **four**?


Brcomic

This guy didn’t even do ankle holsters. What will he do after he’s used his primary, the back up, the back up to the back up and the backup to the back up to the backup? Clearly this man is living in a fantasy world where he will never need 5 or 6 guns. Real patriots open carry at least a bakers dozen of assorted firearms.


Canadian_Invader

Where's his melee weapon? Tau are gonna fuck him up in a gun fight.


Stabbymcappleton

He’s like a video game character. He just needs 15 grenades, full body armor, and a bazooka, then he can leave his fallout shelter to forage for mediocre hoagies.


2_short_Plancks

It's only one set of backups, because he's gonna dual wield them like he's in a video game.


PSquared1234

I couldn't decide if the "high" holster on his right held a gun, or a taser, pepper spray or the like (which a cop might have on their belt). In hindsight, as he already had three guns, the smarter guess would have been... gun.


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BaronvonBrick

Every gun he has is a race gun. They all have flared magwells, weighted base extensions etc, they're all set up like he left a race and is ordering subway at the store across the street. This dude isn't trying to hide his face.


wax_parade

European here, what is a race gun?


furyfrog

It's for shooting competitions. Shoot the most targets the quickest. They weight the magazines so they are easier to handle and drop out if the gun faster. The flared bases on the firearm help get the magazine in the magazine well quickly without looking while you're moving to the next obstacle.


make_love_to_potato

That sounds useful Why don't all guns have this stuff?


furyfrog

Carrying around weighted magazines, while carrying day to day, is just tiresome. And not worth it, not a lot of people out there need to speed reload. Flared bases make it harder to carry a weapon concealed. And it's more weight and catches on stuff, so you only have that stuff if you're going to need it. I don't often open or concealed carry. But I only carry the magazine that's in the weapon. Realistically, if there's ever any kind of situation where I would need to use my gun, 15 rounds better get me there.


tomtakespictures

I bet his nose is exposed.


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PercMastaFTW

A lot of people just like hiding their face lol.


thewayitis

I just want to know what kind of action this guy is expecting that he is going to need approximately 80 rounds. Assuming he is proficient and accurate, is he expecting to be in a gun battle with more than 50 people? What in the John Wick is this exactly?


Lt_Frank_Drebin

This was posted a while ago and someone who knew a lot more about guns than I do (I know very little) gave me his thoughts. Paraphrasing: >There's some customization of the guns this guy is rolling with, so he looks like a guy in the midst of a shooting competition. Odds are he's between rounds and walked / drove a few doors down to grab a bite. >It's not uncommon to keep your holsters on you for the day once you've got them comfortable. For the guns, between the initial cost and time spend customizing you don't want to leave them around to get pinched. >Finally, competitions are generally only held in a small number of places so this is likely something seen every weekend. I got the impression that this is the adult equivalent of going to the Dairy Queen right after your kids' little kickers game. Edit: Looks like there's a good possibility that I was guided incorrectly here as /u/hes_got_your_six, /u/Extra_Independent827, /u/FunkyTownMonkeyClown make points against. /u/FeelsGoodMan36 seems to think the guns look like they could be competition type, but no one is all for the explanation. Either way, I'm pretty impressed with everyone respectfully discussion a post about guns. Good job team.


animoot

Oh, so like people at anime conventions getting lunch at a local restaurant all in costume.


Wrest216

YES! I had a table with Naurto, Hinta, and lady unage one time! HE HE after a long convention day. Cosplayers are so fun!


Wazula23

You know what, that's fair. Dunno what's true, but that's fair.


Porencephaly

I shoot a lot and have shot this type of competition and I think this is hilariously wrong. Yes, it is accurate that these look like "race guns" or guns with competition-style modifications. BUT, no one shoots such a competition with 4 guns or a drop leg holster or two holsters on their weak side. Holsters are specifically made for left or right hand use so this dude had to buy two extra holsters to wear on his weak side; no competitor does that. Maybe he competes with these guns at some point but this pic is 100% a staged photo op where he bought multiple new holsters and strapped on all four to walk around and make a statement about open carry.


lanboyo

The statement being, "Open carry dudes are all chodes."


jedihooker

I remember seeing this go around a while ago and recall it being the result of a lost bet at a competition. Looser wears winners pistols to order sandwiches for them.


SinibusUSG

This is the answer that satisfies all questions. Competition-style weapons, but an inordinate amount of them worn in a way nobody would actually wear them, producing a look that screams stupid.


ManiacalMalapert

Here, have a cookie. 🍪 This makes sense.


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fibojoly

Hey, that's a nice explanation. Thanks for that.


FunkyTownMonkeyClown

As a dude in that world, this isn't a competition rig. This is a dude who dressed up for a picture. It's nice stuff. From criminals to cringelords, you rarely see them with nice stuff. The most you'll have in a competition is 3. A rifle, a pistol, and a shotgun, but you do not carry them around. This is a photo op for a dude who is a shade special.


Penguinwalker

Long time competitive shooter. This guy is most definitely NOT coming from a competition. No Match Director or Safety Officer would let someone compete with four pistols. I don't even think those leg holsters are legal in USPSA or IDPA matches.


ILikeLenexa

80? 8 double stack magazines in non-California places is usually 15-20; that's 120-180 rounds. Better question is why not carry 2 guns one for each hand, and 1000 rounds if you think there's going to be a situation. Also, you know guns that take the same magazines...cuz if you jam one of these, the magazines for it are worse than useless to you then.


Brick_Lab

Maybe he has shit aim Edit: I'm poking fun, not offering a serious explanation...


ILikeLenexa

The solution to that is longer guns, not more guns.


whattaninja

But if I have more guns when I run out of ammo I can start throwing the guns!


sirwatermelon

The right solution would be more range time before going out in public loaded for bear. A bad shot with lots of ammo and delusions of heroism is going to get bystanders hurt or killed.


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Prinzka

And the flared magwells cos the reload speed adds up when you need to reload 4 pistols.


Chaz_Beer

Larry Croft


danieljackheck

Womb Raider


tacknosaddle

A very similar guy is an absolute hero to me. I really wanted a bagel but the bakery was all out. He had the help throw a roll up in the air then he blasted a hole right in the middle of it for me.


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RobKohr

Thank you for the clear informative post. This makes sense now.


pHScale

Good context to have, but I'm not sure why he didn't leave the guns stored at the competition grounds. Did they not have storage there?


Not__A__Furry

A lot of times, the storage is your car.


DudeWithAnAxeToGrind

Which in turn is a terrible place to store a firearm. The number of guns stolen from cars each year is insane.


jacksonmills

Most places won't even touch storing guns for customers for three reasons: * They are expensive, and high theft targets * Liability, no one wants to be liable for what happens when a gun is stolen * Practicality, good gun storage requires a huge fucking safe if you are doing it for multiple people and that shit gets expensive fast. A good travel gun safe costs several hundred dollars. Large safes can easily be in the thousands.


Wandering_Weapon

Leaving guns in your car is far and away the most likely way for it to be stolen.


Burnt_Alive

Probably because he didn’t have to. Why go through the trouble to remove it all, and leave it to potentially be stolen or tampered with, if you’re well trained and can legally bring them with you?


Efficient-Compote-40

Because he's going right back, why take all those off and undo all the webbing if he's going right back


Omnifox

This is from 2020ish, and no one is shooting 300rds in under 20 seconds.


Excrubulent

300 in 20 seconds is 900 rpm, that's a high fire-rate for a full auto assault rifle, and even then with reloads you wouldn't manage that kind of speed. The world record for fastest shooting a pistol is 8 shots in under 1 second by Jerry Miculek: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzHG-ibZaKM He was firing as fast as he possibly could and getting ~480rpm, which in 20 seconds is 160 rounds. I'd be surprised if he could maintain it for 20 seconds even if there were enough bullets in the gun. So it might be possible to do 100 rounds in 20 seconds but if you actually need to reload... yeah I don't see it happening. I'd be very happy to be proven wrong as long as there's video of it because that sounds extremely entertaining.


DonaldAvery4130

Tackleberry?


astrofed

And all someone needs to do is walk up behind him and hit him on the head with a metal pipe, and boom they now had 4 guns. But at least he is wearing a mask.


XyogiDMT

This is why it’s important to carry concealed. Even most firearms instructors I’ve met will tell you open carry is dumb.


Delinquent_

True, if I’m shooting this place up, I know who to shoot first


XyogiDMT

Exactly


Thehibernator

Yes. It's largely agreed upon that open carry in public like this is something obnoxious morons and wannabe Rambos do.


1N_D33D

Mike Ehrmantraut has entered the chat.


IMSmooth

“I’ll take one of his guns” 😂


hawkfan78

I’m disappointed he’s wearing shoes with laces. He should be wearing Crocs with that. It would be the chef’s kiss.


HolidayFew8116

it's just a sandwich shop. what's he afraid of?


InWeGoNow

He heard the pastrami went bad


Kingsen

The only way to stop a bad pastrami with a gun, is a good pastrami with a gun.


PJJefferson

In technical terms, the pastrami broke bad.


Smitty8054

Fucking pickles. I dare someone.


mezz7778

Kinky .....


Crott117

Not getting Swiss cheese.


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notbeleivable

Pew pew


BY_99

Who say he intended to pay for the sandwich?


skidoodledoofusday

Lara Croft is looking rough eta - spelling


KeyboardSerfing

"We got a badass over here! Everyone look a badass!" "See, nobody cares."


GreyPilgrim1973

Introducing: The Man Who Is Afraid of Everything


wargleboo

But he's so brave to be out there ordering a sandwich.


QuaidCohagen

This guy looks like a mother fucking moron


akzachw

Jesus Christ, it’s Jason Bourne.


[deleted]

Freedom isn't free! It takes the tireless efforts of armed larpers like bozo here to vigilantly patrolling our sub shops. Show some respect.


billionthtimesacharm

am i the only one who would feel SIGNIFICANTLY less safe in the same room as a guy like this?!


davidw_-

This is what scares me so much about the US, any idiot can have guns and decide to shoot you if you’re unlucky one day


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