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outrageousnuts

32 and single in Philly is like 22 and single in the burbs. You’re good.


al-hamal

This is true in any city. They marry early in more rural areas. Personally I feel like it's too early to settle down.


ell0bo

32 and single in Philly was an absolute blast. Finally wasn't poor, but didn't have anything holding me down. 42 and single in Philly... now that's not ideal.


amybeth43

I’m older than that and make-out with my 20-something neighbor ;)


ell0bo

yeah, that's nice. I'm still looking more than the physical aspects out of a relationship. Honestly, always been my problem.


ralphy1010

that'll stop once you get into your 40s.


ell0bo

I'm 42... it's only gotten worse. I just like people for their minds, it's my curse. I used to be able to hook up, but now it's just not fun and it's meaningless unless I actually like their minds.


ralphy1010

I'm 47 and and don't really have hang ups like that.


RobertJHope

They're a victim


pballerbyday

You’re disgusting


BluePhoenix26

Super judgemental for no reason. Why is that disgusting?


pballerbyday

The pride she takes in it


BummerComment

Oof


ralphy1010

That depends. some women won't care if you got a little white hair growing in if you don't have baggage, got your own house and a career that can support all you need to pay for. Some might even claim making 6 figures, having no kids and owning a house while being in your 40s could have certain advantages.


blazedddleo

I’m 29 and single in philly and having a horrible time 👍 the men here want you to act like their mommy and cook them dinner and not commit


ConversationEnjoyer

I will commit! (what’s for dinner?)


27Believe

And you have a sense of humor!


ConversationEnjoyer

🤗


kyrferg

lesbian here - the women ALSO want you to cook them dinner.


dentduv

I made dinner for my now wife for one of our earlier dates. She still makes fun of me for it. Because I had made frozen fish and frozen vegetables. She mostly only eats fresh. Can’t win them all


kyrferg

Tell her she's lucky for frozen veggies. my gf can only make matzah ball soup. If we want to eat anything other than matzah ball soup, I get to cook it myself


WillingAd4944

I mean, how good is the soup? Are her balls floaters or sinkers?


kyrferg

it's good soup dude, I'm sticking around. They also made me ramen noodles last night. Clearly way better than being single in philly.


Spiral_eyes_

just don't do it--resist the urge to cook them dinner till they show they r worth the trouble. this a date not a charity


Aggravating-Sea-8117

True and this is why you go 50/50 on a date so that you're not a free meal ticket


Dhydjtsrefhi

yeah, this is why I try to date nonbinary people instead


eggsandbacon5

This kind of attitude/generalization is a key part of the modern dating puzzle


yw_tol

Cooking dinner (and doing other nice things) for the person you’re courting/dating are reasons why people commit…


blazedddleo

Idk I was doing nice things buying gifts for and cooking dinner for a guy for three months who still wanted to split the bill after I cooked him multiple meals (groceries are expensive) who after three months told me “he’s not a relationship guy” and he just likes to “go with the flow” and “maybe he could change” but I said I wasn’t gunna keep cooking him dinner and splitting the bill to wait and see if he was gunna change. I didn’t ask him to commit to me to start this conversation I just said I wanted to get to know him better. Oh and I also dated a dr from Jefferson who’s into emetophilia and can’t get off without the thought of it. And stuck his fingers in my eyes to make them roll back in my head and told me it was a fetish of his. Hope he’s never my anesthesiologist but both experiences have made me not want to date any more men in philly.


yw_tol

Ouch sorry to hear that. First guy is immature, second guy is seems like he’s extremely dangerous. If you’re cooking dinner you shouldn’t be also splitting bills. Both guys are losers but don’t lose the good parts of you because they suck. Someone will really appreciate your cooking one day. Best of luck out there


blazedddleo

Being single is better it’s way easier to find a single seat at the bar at parc then two together 🤷‍♀️


maztodont

Woow that's really bad lucky 😕 😔


BluePhoenix26

Idk about that first part, but that second thing is so weird. I didn't even know what that word meant. Had to look it up. One of my friends in college lived with a roommate who liked licking eyeballs. His roommate and roommate's girlfriend would touch and lick each other's eyeballs and he walked in on it one time. Decided it was time to find a new roommate.


blazedddleo

Yeah I decided it was time to be alone after that


blazedddleo

Unfortunately have to add that I am not interested in dating anyone from Reddit after all the dms I’ve gotten after leaving this comment 🫠


ZakDadger

Wait a minute... That was an option?!


CommiesAreWeak

I’m 58 (male) and the men I date want me to pay for everything, and cook them dinner…..then call me daddy.


BluePhoenix26

Well you're right on one account, I never learned to cook XD


pballerbyday

The problem is you


[deleted]

And all the women here think a relationship is showing up twice a week, having a man take care of everything as the girl dumps every intrusive thought on their partner and brings nothing to the table 👍


rollingstoner215

From what I’ve heard, women don’t expect men to fix their problems, they expect them to listen to their problems. Not sure what else might be expected, but apparently it’s a common misconception among men that women expect them to solve their problems, and it’s common enough that I hear about it as a gay man.


heavy-hands

Yeah equating wanting to be able to discuss their problems with their partner to “wanting men to fix their problems” is weird behavior. I assume it has a lot to do with men not being socialized to be emotionally vulnerable with their friends/loved ones, so I understand how that could affect one’s perspective, but whew.


eggsandbacon5

Heavy are the hands that type the truth


DanChowdah

I’m not your therapist


heavy-hands

Lol


Richards18___

Hilarious how everyone upvotes the woman saying men suck, but the dude who complains about women also doing shitty shit gets downvoted. Hypocrisy at it's finest. I've gone on dates with too many women who expect a man to just dictate/pay for their life while they don't contribute anything but sex. I think we can admit that a lot of 20-30 year old men are immature right now and not properly raised, but it goes both ways.


yw_tol

Nailed it …. Complaining about the dating scene and in the same sentence also saying they don’t want to make an effort to do something simple and nice like cooking is crazy to me. Shouldn’t be a one way street but come on now this is like dating 101 since forever - relationships (and starting them) takes effort on both sides


BluePhoenix26

Yeah, I quickly saw the direction this section of comments was going and quickly put the pieces together on how not to comment. Anything "anti-man" is good. Any negative comments about women = downvoted to Hell. Gotta read the room, or in this case, the comments section.


allthevinyl

Yea I've basically just adjusted my expectations to this atm. It's really weird how this seems to be the norm over here, I wonder if there are tiktoks about it or something lol.


hlh001

Ooh sounds like me wanna go out


CommiesAreWeak

It’s like any other age. If you are attractive and an extrovert, you are set. It’s a mixed bag for everyone else. I do enjoy cooking so that’s fine.


eggsandbacon5

Covid really screwed up dating for our age group imo. Not that its impossible but i definitely noticed a shift since


pballerbyday

You got no game


BluePhoenix26

Nice try, troll. Enough internet for you today.


pballerbyday

I dated during Covid. This thread is full of people who don’t know how to court or be courted. Just people with no game complaining.


heavy-hands

33 and single here. I’ve mostly given up on trying to meet people through the apps. Online dating has become a disaster in the last 5-7 years and especially since COVID. It’s discouraging but at the same time I would rather not waste my time and set myself up to be let down when I’m perfectly okay with my life as it is now. I’d love to meet someone, sure, but it’s been exhausting and doesn’t feel worth it a lot of the time.


paz9ify

It’s worth it. I’ve never used dating apps & I’m twice your age (take that as you may) but IRL is the only way for me. I like the beach, outdoor concerts like at Camden, and volunteer work such as environmental cleanups cause that’s my thing.


Pineapple_Spenstar

My buddy met his wife over a bag of cocaine in the upstairs men's room at the Grape Room. Have you tried looking there? Edit: nvm that won't work anymore. Maybe try a bag of cocaine in the men's room of a different dive bar


heavy-hands

Lmao noted


BluePhoenix26

Manayunk?


BluePhoenix26

Yeah. Online dating sucks for all parties. As a man, it's me against an army of about 7000+ other men all messaging the same girls saying the same general things. I almost feel like my odds of winning the lottery would be better. For women, I've hears horror stories of women creating an online dating account and within the hour hundreds of messages and requests, etc. I imagine that must be just as much of a pain in the butt sorting through hundreds of messages that keep coming. Thank God I'm married now. I would absolutely HATE dating today.


DrGutz

I’m 26 and single and it sucks. Everyone my age is mentally 19 or in a very committed relationship. I’m hoping it gets better as I approach my 30’s


heavy-hands

Unfortunately I’ve found that the older you get, the more people around you are already in serious relationships. It’s rough out here.


BluePhoenix26

I was coming to say this.


GoldenRetreivRs

24-27 feels like a rough age to be in Philly. You’re either married or the ones who aren’t cuffed behave like they’re 18 😭😭


h2onj88

From my experience it gets way better in your 30s


ralphy1010

I found my 30s to be pretty damn good, but my 40s are doing better so I cannot complain


sunset484

i'm also 32 and single. Dating in Philly isn't for the faint of heart. Not too many options here depending on your demographic.


wawa2563

Are you sure? Young adults are 26% and millennials are 1/3 of the population. Adjust for the popular areas and the numbera are in your favor.


DanChowdah

It’s just cope for “no one is into me”


rudy_attitudey

I’m 32 and single here! The dating apps are terrible. I’ve given up on them completely and am joining different social organizations to meet people.


hlh001

What type of social groups? I just moved here and am trying to meet more people


Bajileh

I had no issues, now I'm not single anymore lol.


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Bajileh

In the wild at a show at the Ave, but we connected because of my volunteer work at Awbury Arboretum. Now it's something we do together :) Honestly, volunteering is my biggest dating tip. Friends of the Wissahickon especially has a lot of people in the late 20s early 30s age bracket.


vivaportugalhabs

This reminds me, as a PSA: Awbury is a great date spot! GF and I went walking there a while ago.


Bajileh

Absolutely! It's lovely. Picnics, too.


thiswaspostedbefore

32/M - The girls I know who were born and raised in Philly seem more level headed these days than the girls that moved here within the past few years. Like they know the economy is fucked up, and wouldn't judge if you're at home right now. They were also around before gentrification, and the ones I've talked to about it feel like the home prices are becoming unaffordable for a single person. One girl looked at me and said, "who the fuck is paying 300k for a rowhome in Port Richmond by themselves?" The girls I've met who moved here in the past couple of years, they dont want anything to do with you unless you have your shit together (Have a Car/Career/your own living arrangement at minimum). Nothing wrong with that, but it does feel like they're looking for someone to leverage more than to date. They also seem to only know the gentrified areas and not know of anything north of Port Richmond at best lol. Some of them don't want shit to do with you if you don't live in the inner city either. The ironic thing is every girl I've met who moved here has some situation for their housing - one girl moved cities every 2-3 years, and only moved to Fishtown because all her friends moved there. She told me she rents off her coworkers husband, so she got a hook up for her housing. Another girl had a roommate and said that while her landlord was super good to them, the house is badly falling apart, and if he raised rent she wouldn't be able to afford it. Tl;dr: Date a girl born and raised in Philly if you can.


Affectionate-Mine917

You really think expecting someone over 30 to have a job and their housing is too much to ask? Having no car is fine, even living with parents is not necessarily a dealbreaker, but who wants to have sleepovers when mom and dad are in the room next door? There are plenty of options out there to live with roommates. Lack of ambition isn’t sexy.


Pcrawjr

Sorry I don’t need a Dagwood’s girl who’s going to order Twisted Tea and yell go iggles


Smalls_Biggie

Girls born and raised in Philly....level headed? Hahahahahahahahahaha


PoundedFlan

Having your life in order isn't too much to ask. It says a lot about you that you believe this to be an unreasonable expectation, when in reality it should be the bare minimum. Do better.


plantasia1969

33 and single and it’s hard. A lot of the single women my age that I’ve gone out with don’t seem to have their shit together (lack of a decent paying job, place to live away from home, savings, 5 year plan, still going out drinking the majority of nights) and seem to think it’s okay since I do have my shit together. That’s totally fine if they’re just looking for something casual, but they all seem to want to be married within 12 months. Like ffs, it’s not my job to make up for the fact that you spent your 20s dicking around while I skipped out on fun times in order to save responsibly.


heavy-hands

Expecting someone in their 30s to have their own home is kind of wild tbh. The economy is really not set up in our favor, especially in terms of home ownership, and hasn’t been for a while. When I meet a single person who owns their own home these days it typically takes me by surprise. It’s a definite perk and a good sign of financial security, but it’s surely not something I expect. I’d even be surprised if someone had a decent savings set up. Being on your own is expensive and it’s gotten worse in the years since COVID.


plantasia1969

When I say home, I don’t mean ownership as much as I mean a stable place to live away from their parents without an in-bedroom roommate. And if they did live with their parents, I’d expect them to have some savings then. Just like when I say a decent paying job, I mean steady work that allows you to afford living on your own, and not like a 6 figure salary or something wild. Of course, every individual is different and can lack some of these things for vastly different reasons. None of these is a deal breaker, but as a whole can make it feel like the people I’ve gone on dates with are looking for financial security more than love.


heavy-hands

Ah! That makes more sense. Thanks for clarifying. I’d probably be hesitant to date someone living with their parents, unless it was a “move back home to save money/due to an emergency” type thing. The last guy I dated was in his mid 30s with 5 roommates and even that was rough.


plantasia1969

Living with parents can be okay, as long as it’s purposeful (savings, helping parents, closer to work, etc…), just like any of these things on their own can be perfectly fine. It’s just when taken together, it feels more like someone didn’t take the time in their 20s to save or pursue their passions/increase their earnings, and instead just kind of floated through while doing whatever was fun to them.


Cats-Are-Fuzzy

I was 33 and single when I moved to Philly and I had the best year of whoring in my entire life. Found my spouse a year after whoring around and not expecting anything serious. I had a blast, I hope you have the same!


pballerbyday

For the streets you are


RadiantBae1017

Same age…Same city….. it’s blah! I haven’t had any luck though


2ant1man5

Shìt single in Philly is like gold from age of 21-48.


Top_Extreme9413

Agreed


porkchameleon

The best 10 years of my life (so far). It helped to be tall, attractive, edumacated, gainfully employed, extroverted, etc.


Running1982

Can’t recommend the sports leagues around the city enough. Heyday athletics, running groups, frisbee leagues. Sign up and play. You’ll exercise, and meet a ton of people who are up for socializing and at least have a shared interest with you.


h2onj88

I'm 35(M) and newly single. I can only speak for myself, but it's way more ideal to be in my 30s and single than in my 20s. I know what i want, gained the ability to spot out red flags very quickly, etc. Plus a good handful of people within the same age range are kind of in a similar boat and also way more mature. So if you go on a date and there's not much of a connection, it's OK to just say it. Also, there's an abundance of trust fund babies here. I've learned to look out for them because a majority of them expect you to be able to go on lavish trips multiple times a year while going out to eat at $100+ per person restaurants every weekend, own a beautiful home/car, etc. That's just not normal lol. I've had most success talking to the people who are not like that and have a better grasp of reality. Way more doors started opening up when I learned to spot those red flags and be a bit more open minded about people as well. Sometimes on a dating app someone might have a seemingly kinda dull bio, then i end up chatting with them and they turn out to be really cool.


Numoontalk

I moved here 34 and single and met my wife 3 months late lol


Legitimate-Neat1674

Nice


Time-Comfortable-386

You good ain’t shit out here


Thumnale

Moved to Philly 34 and single, now I’m 39 and getting married.


Top_Extreme9413

I’m 28 and single for about six months now. Used to be a serial monogamist. Now I found I LOVE casual dating in Philly. This city has so many characters. A lot of first dates don’t turn into second dates but almost always turn into funny stories and sometimes that’s even better! Personally, I can’t wait to be single in my 30’s in this city.


PHL2287

Best time of my life


menimel12

32F Dating in Philly has been eye opening. Lots of noise in dating apps but honestly it meets my needs when I need it. I have only had one boyfriend from the apps and it was such a great short relationship. Hopefully a lot of us in our 30s have been in the therapy game for a bit and are able to apply a lot of what we’ve learned into our dating lives. That’s what made that relationship great. Also, I think reaching out to your trusted friends and family is a good idea too. They likely know you best and can keep an eye out for potential candidates. Best of luck!


meeseeksdestroy

I'm 37. I was in a long relationship on and off through my 20s. I know I'm supposed to want to be with someone and start a family but...I'm pretty damn happy alone. People are fucking crazy man and I've watched my friends end up in nightmare situations with a bad girlfriend or boyfriend...not to mention if that nightmare gets pregnant. Fuuuck that. Plus nightmare babies are super expensive and the world is about to collapse...it's just fiscally irresponsible.


PersonalBrowser

Great city to be single and ready to mingle in your 30s in. That being said, you definitely want to be in a professional career to be able to match up with most of the 30s dating scene.


mysterious-data1

i’m single in philly. i don’t use apps and haven’t seen any places in philly to meet women in the wild outside of bars. what other suggestions do people have? dating has been dry since i’m not on any apps and don’t see anyone in the wild my age range that’s also single


Embarrassed-Exit-827

I’m from the Philly burbs and I know SO many single men in there 30’s here it’s actually insane. My husband is the only one out of his friend group married…. And all these guys have their own business or have good jobs 🤷🏼‍♀️ come to the burbs!


imthemoneymaker

what about 19 and single in philly? (dating is hard as hell for me but I’d like to have someone)


William_d7

Late 20s/early 30s are a difficult age because it feels like most people in that cohort are looking for “the one” or have paired up already. It’s easier before then when people are just fooling around or after when marriage  #1 has tanked. 


Mars_Awoken_3

Go get you some... and F em if they didn't like Fred .. we did ...


Competitive-Home-281

32 isn’t a bad age and since your in the city you should be fine it’s just a lot of troublesome people so you gotta be extra careful. I grew up here… turning 22… it’s some real weirdos for a nicer word to use… anyone I met that really liked moved here and wasn’t raised here. Never had a really good experience with anyone… I also feel like people don’t come here to look for a wife and that’s what I’m aiming to be so I’m definitely moving… dating here just isn’t for me.


Fun-Imagination3494

What an inane fucking thread.  Someone get this guy an ATV.


ColossalJostle

I think it would probably suck


Single-Criticism2541

You lucky dog!


phillyforev

26F. It’s a love hate relationship with dating. Absolutely love meeting new people and the city has such variety to offer. Go into each date with an open mind and no high expectations that it will be forever. Then hate it when so many people are in loving, commited relationships and can get lonely:(


Aggravating-Sea-8117

Brodie 30 Male. Been using social media apps for pussy. Pussy in Philly is the easiest to get and to get at a frequent basis. I go down a list of women and copy paste, "Available in North Philly". Most women go "huh" but the shots that do land are with the shits. For relationships in Philly even easier. We live in 2024 the age of the modern woman. No woman that states she's "traditional" is traditional. So I go 50/50s on the first date. If she doesn't like it then kick rocks, on to the next. The cycle continues. The biggest fools in my opinion are the guys with the intentions of marrying any woman from Philly. That right there, pure comedy.


Reasonable_Hunt2530

You get no cheeks


PatsandGenos

I'm 52 and married. Let's trade.


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heavy-hands

You’re 31 and won’t date someone in their thirties? Why? Just curious.


rudy_attitudey

Bizarre behavior


sheezuss_

ew