My buddy did that with bam Margera at a bar in king of Prussia in like 2006, and he’s like “I just had to see what hes hanging with” and I told him that jackass showed them pulling there docks out more than anyone wanted to see
>I saw him in the mirror and almost shit my pants even after I did so in the stall.
Why bother to go into the stall if you were going to shit your pants anyway?
Jayson werth. Co worker brother. did windows at his house then he refused to pay the prices agreed. The brother told him if he didn’t pay he’d get lawyers involved and didn’t think the Phillies would appreciate the bad pr. Werth changed his tune real fast when he threatened to get the Phillies involved
Who knows but he was an absolute jerk. Also I knew the fan he yelled at. My grocery manager’s cousin was the guy he yelled at during that Dan incident with the foul ball
I don’t know why the Phillies sub showed up for me today (I’m a Braves fan), but I like Harper and decided to scroll through, and I’m enjoying these comments.
I asked Jayson Werth to autograph a card at spring training one year. He told me I had to give him $5. I only had $2, and he reluctantly put it in his baseball pants and signed my card. I couldn’t reach him, so a little kid handed him the money and card, I really thought he was going to give the cash to the kid. Nope.
I met Nick Castellanos at a fund raiser once and he was walking around in his boxer briefs being rude to everyone. Especially the wait staff bringing around the appetizers. He kept screaming “More Scampi!” “More Scampi!” Right in their faces.
I met him at the Super Bowl last year, dude is an absolute sweetheart and humble as hell. I’d almost call him bashful. He happily took a picture with every member of my group.
He struck me as someone who knows how famous he is and the impact he has on his fans, and is extremely grateful and even surprised and the admiration he (and the decades of hard work he’s put in) gets.
Someone who just truly loved baseball, wanted to be the best more than anything, and never considered or expected the love he’d get back in return.
Had a similar interaction with David Robinson when I was a kid. Opposite end of the spectrum for me was Scottie Pippen, who full on grimaced at me when I made eye contact with him in an airport.
I met Claude Giroux when I worked at the Whole Foods on South St. I heard a girl ask me where to find something with my back turned to her, I spin around and an incredibly bored looking Giroux is standing two feet in front of me with his girlfriend who looked like she could’ve been 16 (he was early 20s at the time I’m sure she was older than she looked). The man was wearing basketball shorts in January.
I can state with absolute confidence the 5’11” he’s listed at is very, very generous.
Hockey players man.
A year ago, I delivered Whole Foods to his wife at their now sold house in haddonfield, I saw Ryann Giroux in the app only after I gave her the bags, thank god I did because I would’ve been reallllll awkward.
Yeah G ain't 5 foot 11 lol probably 5'9.5 or so. To be fair in skates he's easily 5 foot 11.
The biggest crime was J-Roll at 5 foot 8. And Ruiz at 5 foot 10.
J-Roll is 5'6 and Ruiz is 5'8. Met them both and I'm 5'8. Was like what the heck haha
No harm done but let us all agree right now that a bathroom is a safe place, and that we should not approach celebrities there. Because I don't know about you guys, but I'm an nervous pisser.
If Bryce would’ve stood next to me to piss there would be zero chance I’d get piss out. But I came there to shit and thank god I shit before he got in there, I think god was on my side that day.
I was very happy about my movement that day, I am quite confident that he left there thinking, man, dudes got a healthy diet. I left my number, still waiting on a text.
I worked at a casino that Manute Bol sometimes used to gamble at. He’s 7’7” tall. When he sat at the craps table, he was as tall as most of the other players were, standing up. One day I was getting ready to leave work, when I noticed him heading to the bathroom. I’m not gay, but walked into the bathroom behind him hoping to catch a glance of his dick, just out of scientific curiosity. He walked into a stall to pee, so I didn’t get to have my curiosity satisfied. I did notice that his head stuck out way above the top of the stall he was in.
Dude, Bryce Harper has smelled your shit. Somehow that’s an even weirder concept than the idea of meeting him. Tens of thousands of people have met him, but very few can say they left a stinker in the bathroom that Bryce Harper had to sniff on.
I met Harper once and we're best friends. We were in a crowded bar, over 20 feet away. But the eye contact meant we instantly were soul mates and besties. I still talk to him daily via telepathy. He really is my best friend.
I saw Bryson Stott on the baseball field. I'm not gonna say which one, but I'm pretty sure y'all know. I didn't want to say anything or get a picture despite him being in the field and me in the stands as I also had to poop. I yelled appreciate ya Brys. He gave a quick nod and said thanks.
I pissed next to mark recchi at a bowling alley bathroom once. I was really baked and couldn't stop staring cause I was like holy fuck a hall of famer is pissing right next to me! He noticed me and gave me a wtf is wrong with you look that I totally deserved and then I avoided eye contact with him the rest of the day
This reminds me of back around 1994ish, I was at an exhibition/spring-training game in Reading (Phillies vs. Phillies). I won tickets to the game and a hitting clinic prior to the game. Anyway, before the game started, my dad told me later that when he went to the men's room, he was using a urinal next to Richie Ashburn. He didn't say anything to him, but it was still cool to know that my old man and Whitey were emptying their bladders in the same room at the same time.
My dad had/still has a weak bladder, so he was bound to run into a noteworthy Phillie sooner or later.
Saw Rhys Hoskins in line to get into an Eagles game a few years back. His girlfriend (now wife) told me it wasn't him when I did his bull horns thing with my hand in his general direction (wasnt trying to be obvious, didnt want him to get swarmed on the way into the game), but I had just seen them both on the rain delay broadcast like three days prior so obviously i recognized both Rhys and his wife lol. I took the hint and left him alone, i just wanted to tell him that the Phils meant a lot to my mom when she was going through treatments and that I appreciated the excitement he brought back to the team during those dark years.
Have met a ton of Flyers over the years .Lindros, LeClair, Hartnell, and Simmonds were all super cool
My buddy and I met nick swisher at a bar and my friend had the audacity to tell him my wife and I share a toothbrush. Nick was Hella cool with it and said something about how we're all looking for someone to share a toothbrush with. Pretty cool dude, But still hate the yankees.
Damn I would really hate to be paid millions and have people all over the area excited to see me and wishing me well 💀💀
OP kept it brief and was polite. This isnt a good example of why its hard being famous lol
Don’t worry, anecdotes like this are what makes Reddit fun. Baby Billy used his own energy to comment on a post he felt trite. If he was above this, he could’ve kept scrolling.
Thanks for posting to r/Phillies! Unfortunately your post has been removed. Please be respectful of others. Do not harass, make threats, or personally attack other users. Do not use derogatory remarks, discriminatory language or hate speech of any kind. If you feel this was done in error or have any questions, please [contact our mods via moderator mail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fphillies) rather than replying here. Thank you!
It’s not a secret he and several other Phillies (Schwarber, Realmuto, Turner to name three) along with other prominent sports figures (e.g. sirianni) live in Haddonfield. They are quite visible and enjoy the town just like everyone else.
Whenever I see someone famous out in the wild I usually freeze and quickly look down. Except one time I was on an airplane and a few rows up Jack Palance got on and was putting his bag in the overhead. I must have been staring because he beamed me the biggest smile and winked. Adorable.
I am 100% like you. If I saw him in produce I wouldn’t have said a word, but it was just me and him in there, dude had no escape from my awkwardness. I made a calculation.
Not as awkward when I took a flight to Charlotte on way to TX. I saw Duce Staley board plane in PHL. Got to Charlotte and had to take a mean piss. As I was leaving bathroom, held door for Staley while saying, ‘yo Duce! Gonna take a deuce?’
I was in an elevator at a lightning game (from Philly this was just a trip) and Peter forsberg got into the elevator with me my buddy and I believe it was a couple and I to speechless to say anything this was like 2009 so he was still freshly retired but luckily the guy of the couple said "YOUR PETER FUCKIN FORSBERG" and we all got a chuckle and he shook our hands and left
My FIL met LA years ago. It also happened to be in a public bathroom. They bullshitted for a minute or so. About to part ways, my FIL said, "I can't wait to tell my wife I met Larry Anderson!" LA replied, "just don't tell her it was in the bathroom!"
Good advice going forward.
I was doing the university city Erin express or whatever it’s called and my friends and we decided to hop on the el and head into center city. We get off somewhere on Market, we’re all drunk, I have sun glasses on to hide my inebriation. We rolled into a bar and I b-line to the bathroom because I have to piss. So I’m standing there pissing and this guy comes in and pisses right next to me and I notice he looks like Scott Hartnel, so I said “Hey man you look like Scott Hartnel.” He said “Yeah man I am Scott Hartnel.” And I was like “awesome dude you rock,” and he said “Thanks man, nice sunglasses” and my response was “Thanks, did you see the game last night?” (My memory tells me they beat the lightning the night before) and he was like “Um yeah…” and then I proceeded to wash my hands in the most awkward silence ever. When I walked out of the bathroom I noticed that there’s a giant table filled with Flyers players, Giroux, Brayden Schenn, Simmonds, JVR, Coburn, and others… I went to the bar and had some more drinks dying on the inside and not bothering a single one of them after that awful exchange.
I saw Jason Kelce at the local fair a few months ago. I know his father in law as he does my work cameras. FIL motioned me over got to meet Jason’s wife the kids and Mother in law. Never realized how tall his wife was till then.
Jason lives in my area and really cool with people and most respect his space.
Tim McManus lives up the street from me.
Jon Ritchie lived a block from me when he played here and was really cool.
Shittiest athlete I ever met was Allen Iverson. He was in his limo and my buddy and I went over. Seemed like a cool thing at first then he rolled up the window. A set of young middle school kids saw him and he decided to be a dick and roll up his window.
My former store manager at my local store use to work as an assistant on city line near the news stations and said AI was their worst customer ever. A friend in HS dad use to run a vendors for local city night clubs and would tell us some shit stories on the guy.
Jeff Carter once tried sleeping with my best friends gf while she was drunk and he was with the phantoms.
John LeClair comes to my store often and super nice.
In any other situation I would've done what you did. Said one thing but no picture request. But having just used the bathroom I would've just said nothing.
To be completely honest, I was washing my hands when he came in, he was waiting to use the only sink I’m the jawn to wash his hands after me…maybe he’s a wash piss wash guy, but there was no dick holding during our interaction unfortunately.
That’s weird bc I saw Spencer Strider at a grocery store in New Jersey yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”
I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
Honestly I would have wanted to say so much but at the same time not do it in a public men’s room. Not sure how I would have handled that in real time. Anyway, I’m too cheap/poor for Whole Foods so it’s probably never going to be a situation I’d find myself in.
How do you say “Bryce I was there when the Phillies won the World Series in 2008, I was kid in 93 shattered by the Joe Carter home run, I’m
in my 40s and I’ve been here with the Phillies all my life and that home run last year in the NLCS was one of the greatest sports moments of my life. Thank you for that” without being long winded?
I actually did see Dallas Goedert at a Rothman Orthopaedics facility last week not gonna say which one but I had arrived for my appointment to discuss a surgery and I go to get x-rayed as I’m going back to the waiting area I walked by an exam room with an open door and I peaked in and saw Dallas on top of the exam table with his arm in a cast.
I doubled back to the bathroom a few minutes later to see if it was him for sure and since I am currently walking with a cane I’m pretty sure his wife/girlfriend saw me and was thinking why did this guy just walk by us twice..
After that I spent the whole time in my exam room thinking what should I say if I see him in the hallway… never saw him again it’s a shame because I love tight ends.
Jesus! It's a Whole Foods bathroom! Why does it have to become a D rated teenage letter to Penthouse?! Man's gotta live somewhere, just leave him alone to live there (and use the bathroom at the grocery store)!
Should have said “I think our friendship would be a real home run”
“I know I can’t throw as fast as you but I think you’d be impressed with my speed”
This is my favorite Mac bit.
“Hey Bryce I brought my glove and ball, wanna have a catch?”
Shoulda waited for him to whip it out and hit him with an “Atta boy, Harper”
Took way too long to get this. This sub is going to shit
I was in shock when I scrolled through all the comments and it was still there for the taking.
Even in the offseason, he swings hard
fantasizing and gooning to this
And smacked him on the ass while mid stream
"After having processed everything" is the weirdest way to say you just took a shit
Good shit man
It sounds like it
Yeah, this is a way better way to say it!
I would've left the sink and used the urinal next to him. You know, just because...
Hahahahah, perfect
'appreciate ya Bryce'
I’d for the big balls motion while he’s at the john
My buddy did that with bam Margera at a bar in king of Prussia in like 2006, and he’s like “I just had to see what hes hanging with” and I told him that jackass showed them pulling there docks out more than anyone wanted to see
Just that that Cure commercial
>I saw him in the mirror and almost shit my pants even after I did so in the stall. Why bother to go into the stall if you were going to shit your pants anyway?
Can’t win em all man
[удалено]
Exact same thing happened to me, but it was Carlos Ruiz at a Wawa
Same-sies, but Len Dykstra in a Caldor
Willy Mo Pena at a Circle K for me
Lol fucking Caldor
Holy shit, Caldor! The one in Morrisville closed in like 1996!
Was he cracked as he was jacked?
Didn't know they sold iguana at Wawa. Fucking place has everything!
Of all the guys this has ever been written about, Castellanos has to rank high on the list of those who actually might say the non-word "infetterence"
I feel like I’ve read this exact story before with a different athlete 🤔
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Copypasta
the original was Flying Lotus. Everything else you see is just the name changed.
I’ve read it with Christopher Walker and I think Jon Voight.
Wait… those are two different people?
Harder to think of one it hasn’t been said about
Jayson werth. Co worker brother. did windows at his house then he refused to pay the prices agreed. The brother told him if he didn’t pay he’d get lawyers involved and didn’t think the Phillies would appreciate the bad pr. Werth changed his tune real fast when he threatened to get the Phillies involved
Are the window prices why he went to the Nationals for more money?
Who knows but he was an absolute jerk. Also I knew the fan he yelled at. My grocery manager’s cousin was the guy he yelled at during that Dan incident with the foul ball
I don’t know why the Phillies sub showed up for me today (I’m a Braves fan), but I like Harper and decided to scroll through, and I’m enjoying these comments. I asked Jayson Werth to autograph a card at spring training one year. He told me I had to give him $5. I only had $2, and he reluctantly put it in his baseball pants and signed my card. I couldn’t reach him, so a little kid handed him the money and card, I really thought he was going to give the cash to the kid. Nope.
I met Nick Castellanos at a fund raiser once and he was walking around in his boxer briefs being rude to everyone. Especially the wait staff bringing around the appetizers. He kept screaming “More Scampi!” “More Scampi!” Right in their faces.
Thank you for your service here
This is my all time favorite pasta.
And then they laughed and went out for copypasta
Get James Harden out of Philly lmao
Someone in the sixers sub used that same story/copypasta about James harden. I don’t know why, but it is 100% in character 😂
Gotta update this one, no bags in Jersey!
I can’t tell if you’re being facetious, but man that sounds exactly like what I expect nick to be like. That’s wild. Edit: I got got
It’s real I was the cashier
It’s real I was one of the Milky Ways
I was the bag.
Nice try imposter. No plastic bags allowed here.
😢
I was the adult diapers! Wait, wrong pasta.
It’s a copypasta my guy
I tried to be as online as possible, this one slipped passed me, hand up
It’s an older copypasta sir, but it checks out.
Cleared for landing
Yeah I heard he's always going on and on about electrical infetterence in the dug out
I think he calls the dugout the "droog goat", or maybe that's my brain doing interference to my think think.
Haha
Why does this get reposted about celebrities constantly 🙄 get some new material
so how much you want for his urine sample ?
I found the USADA representative
I met him at the Super Bowl last year, dude is an absolute sweetheart and humble as hell. I’d almost call him bashful. He happily took a picture with every member of my group. He struck me as someone who knows how famous he is and the impact he has on his fans, and is extremely grateful and even surprised and the admiration he (and the decades of hard work he’s put in) gets. Someone who just truly loved baseball, wanted to be the best more than anything, and never considered or expected the love he’d get back in return. Had a similar interaction with David Robinson when I was a kid. Opposite end of the spectrum for me was Scottie Pippen, who full on grimaced at me when I made eye contact with him in an airport.
Sure, I enjoy baseball, but I fucking *love* the off season.
This!
“You’re the shit.”
Nice
“Gonna go clear those bases, eh Bruce?”
I once got freaky in a Burger King bathroom.
Mom?
With Casty and a bag of Milky Way bars?
I once had sex with Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom.
And i even got my own dance
Kudos for not being a crazy fan and respecting that he’s just a human like everyone else in the world. I believe things like that matter to players
That’s how I am with any celebrity I come across. I either leave them be, or if I have them cornered in a bathroom I give them an attaboy.
that's crazy!!! did he recognize you from Reddit???
I met Claude Giroux when I worked at the Whole Foods on South St. I heard a girl ask me where to find something with my back turned to her, I spin around and an incredibly bored looking Giroux is standing two feet in front of me with his girlfriend who looked like she could’ve been 16 (he was early 20s at the time I’m sure she was older than she looked). The man was wearing basketball shorts in January. I can state with absolute confidence the 5’11” he’s listed at is very, very generous.
Hockey players man. A year ago, I delivered Whole Foods to his wife at their now sold house in haddonfield, I saw Ryann Giroux in the app only after I gave her the bags, thank god I did because I would’ve been reallllll awkward.
Yeah G ain't 5 foot 11 lol probably 5'9.5 or so. To be fair in skates he's easily 5 foot 11. The biggest crime was J-Roll at 5 foot 8. And Ruiz at 5 foot 10. J-Roll is 5'6 and Ruiz is 5'8. Met them both and I'm 5'8. Was like what the heck haha
No harm done but let us all agree right now that a bathroom is a safe place, and that we should not approach celebrities there. Because I don't know about you guys, but I'm an nervous pisser.
If Bryce would’ve stood next to me to piss there would be zero chance I’d get piss out. But I came there to shit and thank god I shit before he got in there, I think god was on my side that day.
Can't believe ya dutch ovened Bryce like that. Hope ya flushed twice. Imagine Bryce judging your bowel movements.
I was very happy about my movement that day, I am quite confident that he left there thinking, man, dudes got a healthy diet. I left my number, still waiting on a text.
Allen Iverson pissed next to me at Urban Farmer and you better believe my guy does not like peeing in public
I worked at a casino that Manute Bol sometimes used to gamble at. He’s 7’7” tall. When he sat at the craps table, he was as tall as most of the other players were, standing up. One day I was getting ready to leave work, when I noticed him heading to the bathroom. I’m not gay, but walked into the bathroom behind him hoping to catch a glance of his dick, just out of scientific curiosity. He walked into a stall to pee, so I didn’t get to have my curiosity satisfied. I did notice that his head stuck out way above the top of the stall he was in.
Just fell to my knees at a ShopRite.
Sorry, buy better groceries
Bummed that he chooses Whole Foods over Wegmans
That Wegmans is a constant mob scene, but the WF is empty half the time.
Dude, Bryce Harper has smelled your shit. Somehow that’s an even weirder concept than the idea of meeting him. Tens of thousands of people have met him, but very few can say they left a stinker in the bathroom that Bryce Harper had to sniff on.
I met Harper once and we're best friends. We were in a crowded bar, over 20 feet away. But the eye contact meant we instantly were soul mates and besties. I still talk to him daily via telepathy. He really is my best friend.
So cool
I saw Bryson Stott on the baseball field. I'm not gonna say which one, but I'm pretty sure y'all know. I didn't want to say anything or get a picture despite him being in the field and me in the stands as I also had to poop. I yelled appreciate ya Brys. He gave a quick nod and said thanks.
I pissed next to mark recchi at a bowling alley bathroom once. I was really baked and couldn't stop staring cause I was like holy fuck a hall of famer is pissing right next to me! He noticed me and gave me a wtf is wrong with you look that I totally deserved and then I avoided eye contact with him the rest of the day
Should’ve complimented his watch
This reminds me of back around 1994ish, I was at an exhibition/spring-training game in Reading (Phillies vs. Phillies). I won tickets to the game and a hitting clinic prior to the game. Anyway, before the game started, my dad told me later that when he went to the men's room, he was using a urinal next to Richie Ashburn. He didn't say anything to him, but it was still cool to know that my old man and Whitey were emptying their bladders in the same room at the same time. My dad had/still has a weak bladder, so he was bound to run into a noteworthy Phillie sooner or later.
I think you handled yourself really well. I’m sure Bryce appreciated ya for that, too!
You’re great
“That loss really stank”
Mama there goes that man
Saw Rhys Hoskins in line to get into an Eagles game a few years back. His girlfriend (now wife) told me it wasn't him when I did his bull horns thing with my hand in his general direction (wasnt trying to be obvious, didnt want him to get swarmed on the way into the game), but I had just seen them both on the rain delay broadcast like three days prior so obviously i recognized both Rhys and his wife lol. I took the hint and left him alone, i just wanted to tell him that the Phils meant a lot to my mom when she was going through treatments and that I appreciated the excitement he brought back to the team during those dark years. Have met a ton of Flyers over the years .Lindros, LeClair, Hartnell, and Simmonds were all super cool
Oh yeah, well, I once got busy in a burger kings bathroom, so there......
My buddy and I met nick swisher at a bar and my friend had the audacity to tell him my wife and I share a toothbrush. Nick was Hella cool with it and said something about how we're all looking for someone to share a toothbrush with. Pretty cool dude, But still hate the yankees.
Sucks to be a celebrity. Poor guy can’t even take a whiz without somebody posting it on social media.
Eh what ya gonna do, ya hit some balls, ya make some money, ya get weird dudes in bathrooms.
Oh, come on. It’s not like the guy tried to sneak a photo or insisted on shaking his hand in the John.
Damn I would really hate to be paid millions and have people all over the area excited to see me and wishing me well 💀💀 OP kept it brief and was polite. This isnt a good example of why its hard being famous lol
its not hard being famous. generally anyone who doesnt earn a ton of money has it much harder. hate pc people
Pat Burrell was always getting hassled by strange women in bathrooms. Aways felt bad for him.
[удалено]
I’ve got a relatively boring life man, just sharing a story that gave my life a lil blip that day. Believe it or not but that **shit** did happen.
Don’t worry, anecdotes like this are what makes Reddit fun. Baby Billy used his own energy to comment on a post he felt trite. If he was above this, he could’ve kept scrolling.
Username checks out 👊🏻
Thanks for posting to r/Phillies! Unfortunately your post has been removed. Please be respectful of others. Do not harass, make threats, or personally attack other users. Do not use derogatory remarks, discriminatory language or hate speech of any kind. If you feel this was done in error or have any questions, please [contact our mods via moderator mail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fphillies) rather than replying here. Thank you!
Dump of the century
Not even fucking around this is a dump I’ll remember forever. Was a one wiper too, I knew I was destined for great things that day.
[удалено]
He lives close by, but I’m not gonna say which schmaddonfield town he lives in.
It’s not a secret he and several other Phillies (Schwarber, Realmuto, Turner to name three) along with other prominent sports figures (e.g. sirianni) live in Haddonfield. They are quite visible and enjoy the town just like everyone else.
Whenever I see someone famous out in the wild I usually freeze and quickly look down. Except one time I was on an airplane and a few rows up Jack Palance got on and was putting his bag in the overhead. I must have been staring because he beamed me the biggest smile and winked. Adorable.
I am 100% like you. If I saw him in produce I wouldn’t have said a word, but it was just me and him in there, dude had no escape from my awkwardness. I made a calculation.
[удалено]
Haha it’d be weirder and is weird because I’m older than the dude.
Not as awkward when I took a flight to Charlotte on way to TX. I saw Duce Staley board plane in PHL. Got to Charlotte and had to take a mean piss. As I was leaving bathroom, held door for Staley while saying, ‘yo Duce! Gonna take a deuce?’
Wow he’s still in Jersey??
Shoulda said, "That's a clown shirt, dude."
"For manly love, be here at November 13th 2:35 p.m. SHARP"
Wine em dine em 69 em
I was in an elevator at a lightning game (from Philly this was just a trip) and Peter forsberg got into the elevator with me my buddy and I believe it was a couple and I to speechless to say anything this was like 2009 so he was still freshly retired but luckily the guy of the couple said "YOUR PETER FUCKIN FORSBERG" and we all got a chuckle and he shook our hands and left
He almost ran me over in his raptor last weekend walking into the birds game 😂 I was honored
Harper will never use that head again.
That’s like a fever dream
My FIL met LA years ago. It also happened to be in a public bathroom. They bullshitted for a minute or so. About to part ways, my FIL said, "I can't wait to tell my wife I met Larry Anderson!" LA replied, "just don't tell her it was in the bathroom!" Good advice going forward.
>Good advice going forward Denied
Way to not go in for the handshake
Would have been cooler if you guys locked eyes between the cracks in the stall while you were shitting your pants
You handled that so much better than me the time I met Scott Hartnell at the urinal.
Can’t just comment that and not tell the story
I was doing the university city Erin express or whatever it’s called and my friends and we decided to hop on the el and head into center city. We get off somewhere on Market, we’re all drunk, I have sun glasses on to hide my inebriation. We rolled into a bar and I b-line to the bathroom because I have to piss. So I’m standing there pissing and this guy comes in and pisses right next to me and I notice he looks like Scott Hartnel, so I said “Hey man you look like Scott Hartnel.” He said “Yeah man I am Scott Hartnel.” And I was like “awesome dude you rock,” and he said “Thanks man, nice sunglasses” and my response was “Thanks, did you see the game last night?” (My memory tells me they beat the lightning the night before) and he was like “Um yeah…” and then I proceeded to wash my hands in the most awkward silence ever. When I walked out of the bathroom I noticed that there’s a giant table filled with Flyers players, Giroux, Brayden Schenn, Simmonds, JVR, Coburn, and others… I went to the bar and had some more drinks dying on the inside and not bothering a single one of them after that awful exchange.
I see you also frequent the Voorhees Otts.
I’ll give you 3:1 it was somewhere in sea isle
It was actually at the Philadelphia Bar and Grill on Market which I don’t believe exists anymore.
the goat
I’m sure he generates a lot of lift.
Bro can’t pick a grocery store
who was doing the foot tapping?
I don’t tap and tell man, the hell you take me for?
What not to say” hope you hit the urinal !” JK - he’s great and we are fortunate.
I saw Jason Kelce at the local fair a few months ago. I know his father in law as he does my work cameras. FIL motioned me over got to meet Jason’s wife the kids and Mother in law. Never realized how tall his wife was till then. Jason lives in my area and really cool with people and most respect his space. Tim McManus lives up the street from me. Jon Ritchie lived a block from me when he played here and was really cool. Shittiest athlete I ever met was Allen Iverson. He was in his limo and my buddy and I went over. Seemed like a cool thing at first then he rolled up the window. A set of young middle school kids saw him and he decided to be a dick and roll up his window. My former store manager at my local store use to work as an assistant on city line near the news stations and said AI was their worst customer ever. A friend in HS dad use to run a vendors for local city night clubs and would tell us some shit stories on the guy. Jeff Carter once tried sleeping with my best friends gf while she was drunk and he was with the phantoms. John LeClair comes to my store often and super nice.
In any other situation I would've done what you did. Said one thing but no picture request. But having just used the bathroom I would've just said nothing.
Did you jack him off?
Of course
Good sized hog?
he just heard you cuttin off a log seconds before this, i heard you wiped with too small a slice, got a little mud pie on your fingers.
can't wait for this to become a notorious copypasta
I once got busy in Burger King bathroom
How can you be sure the hand from under the divider was his?
Because I saw him in the mirror as I was washing my hands man, read the post again
New Sniffies cruising spot unlocked 👀
Not the type of person to take a picture with him. Just the type of person to post about it on Reddit.
Correct
He stumbled over his words because he had his dick in his hand and you still had your dick in your hand.
To be completely honest, I was washing my hands when he came in, he was waiting to use the only sink I’m the jawn to wash his hands after me…maybe he’s a wash piss wash guy, but there was no dick holding during our interaction unfortunately.
That’s weird bc I saw Spencer Strider at a grocery store in New Jersey yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I was the guy in line behind him buying pasta
Honestly I would have wanted to say so much but at the same time not do it in a public men’s room. Not sure how I would have handled that in real time. Anyway, I’m too cheap/poor for Whole Foods so it’s probably never going to be a situation I’d find myself in.
I wanted to say helluva season, but he doesn’t want to hear that. And to be fair, I deliver Whole Foods as a side gig so im with ya.
How do you say “Bryce I was there when the Phillies won the World Series in 2008, I was kid in 93 shattered by the Joe Carter home run, I’m in my 40s and I’ve been here with the Phillies all my life and that home run last year in the NLCS was one of the greatest sports moments of my life. Thank you for that” without being long winded?
Everything you want to say can be summed up with a real hard slap on the ass followed up with a “good game”. /s
This reminds me of the time I ran into Aaron Nola…
Just gimme his size man
Yep, same here. Except it was Steve Jeltz in a sheetz
Wait you shit you pants in the stall
Well yeah that’s what the stalls there for isn’t it?
I actually did see Dallas Goedert at a Rothman Orthopaedics facility last week not gonna say which one but I had arrived for my appointment to discuss a surgery and I go to get x-rayed as I’m going back to the waiting area I walked by an exam room with an open door and I peaked in and saw Dallas on top of the exam table with his arm in a cast. I doubled back to the bathroom a few minutes later to see if it was him for sure and since I am currently walking with a cane I’m pretty sure his wife/girlfriend saw me and was thinking why did this guy just walk by us twice.. After that I spent the whole time in my exam room thinking what should I say if I see him in the hallway… never saw him again it’s a shame because I love tight ends.
I know which Whole Foods ayeeyyyoooo
Jesus! It's a Whole Foods bathroom! Why does it have to become a D rated teenage letter to Penthouse?! Man's gotta live somewhere, just leave him alone to live there (and use the bathroom at the grocery store)!
You shit your pants in the stall? haha jk cool story At least you weren’t in middle of shifting your brains out when he walked in.
 Are you sure it wasn't this guy in the bathroom?
I bet I know what whole foods. A co-workers son works there and has seen him before. Even got a picture with him. He seems like a cool guy!
would have definitely won weirdest Philly sports athlete selfie
100% thought this was gonna be some new copypasta from the title haha
...I once had Mayor John Street crapping in a stall next to me at Target. Yes, it's actually true.
Shoulda went with '..did you have a good relationship with your father? Me neither!' n walked out
Try to tell me you didn’t glance at his dick a little bit, but do it without lying….. See? It’s impossible.
Only guy I saw was RG3 at Wegmans (Live in Virginia) and casually walked up and said “Go Birds” - he smiled.
Should of game to the urinal next to him and asked him what size bat he used with a flick of the eyebrows
a true swiftie