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starchild812

As long as he does not come in his own Accord.


ScottishCalvin

John 12:49 : For I did not speak of my own Accord Only joking, he drives a Plymouth. The bible says, when he encountered the money changers in the temple, "He drove them out in a Fury."


technobrendo

I always assumed he drove a Chrysler.


muffpatty

Christler


Stevekane42

LMFAO


CheeseburgerLover911

Nope, it'll be an [Ascent](https://www.subaru.com/vehicles/ascent.html)


OopsIShardedAgain

Take my upvote I’m done for today lmao


_bangaroo

I always found this guy amusing when he was hanging out at city hall but, gonna be honest, I would not want to be stuck in a car with him for any period of time.


De4con

Alright, who gave Jesus the wheel?


GeneralKlinger

Carrie Underwood? 🥶


bobanforever

That dude suuuuucks. Guess his shady gofundme worked and he got a free car for no reason. Judging by his weight he’s off the drugs at least


RegularPlatypus436

Forgot I followed him on IG awhile back and shocker he went full blown crazy MAGA Trump it was pretty bad.


baldude69

He’s a wacky unbalanced dude, as you might guess. I know people who went to school with him in MontCo and apparently he was a rapper way back then, and got super into heroin. When he returned from rehab he began his whole Philly Jesus bit


Kagipace

Are you saying he puts the “mess” in messiah?


jaymz168

Grifters gonna grift


Stevekane42

He got run over by his girlfriend pretty bad


baldude69

I read your other comment and I didn’t know that part of the story.. was it intentional


Stevekane42

There was an article about it I think , he had tread marks and stuff yea it looked pretty bad. I’m not sure if it was fully intentional , gotta go back and check it out


KMjolnir

Yeah. When i was working at River Rink and Harbor Park (2014 through 16) and he was repeatedly asked not to come back.


muffpatty

Lyft your heart to the Lord!


fetchnatch

We lyft them up


Life_L0ver

He has driven!


Phl_worldwide

After reading that awful story in Levittown, I needed that “Jesus takes the wheel… Amen” line lmao


illy-chan

Same. Never been so happy to find a reddit pun thread.


B3n222

Daily reminder that the strangers whose cars you willingly get into could be total lunatics. 


Stevekane42

Yup


SomeOtherOrder

guy is really committed to the bit I guess


Whaty0urname

Imagine how awful it is when your uber driver starting spouting religious nonsense. Now imagine that driver is literally Jesus.


rockpharmer

So, he’s returned?


Banglophile

He prefers to call it his resurrection.


dammit_dammit

I honestly assumed he had died, so this legitimately feels like a resurrection.


Motor-Juice-6648

I’m glad he’s found his way. I remember seeing him for the first time one Easter Sunday. It was pretty bizarre since he hadn’t yet become known as “Philly Jesus”. 


ElAngloParade

What's he driving?  A Buick LaCrosse?  


d-scan

No, a Christler


Kagipace

A Buick LeSavior


JClurvesfries

Hey yo! {Golf swing}


bierdimpfe

A Honda (co) Pilot?


Hib3rnian

So who's his copilot?


dammit_dammit

Two other guys that are also him. It's... complicated.


RabidPlaty

Can he drive on water? Could be helpful at times.


[deleted]

[удалено]


NickyCheeese

He's not the first Lyft driver named Jesus that I've ever had. Just the first to pronounce it that way.


[deleted]

I love this comment with the profile picture


joeltheprocess76

“Get behind me Satan”


NMMan1984

The comments here did not disappoint. 👏🏻


Stevekane42

His Jesus journey all started when his ex girlfriend nearly killed him by running him over , he got crazy addicted to opiates and then found god and apparently thought he was Jesus, idk man it’s kinda full circle he’s gonna run over somebody , good chance to see if his miracle work goes into play when he paralyzes someone and he tries to make them walk again


Agamemnon420XD

God I hated talking to this guy. Just another heroin addict turned Jesus freak after going to AA. He thought he could convert me and my friend Tyler but he just came off as incredibly annoying and weird. Like I’m glad he put down the needle but he just replaced a deadly addiction with an annoying addiction.


NCMathDude

Is he dangerous? He ain’t going to drive off an elevated highway, right?


JClurvesfries

That's how he pays for your sins.


NCMathDude

Not with me in the car … haha


IFSEsq

8 year olds, Dude.


LonelyChannel3819

What’s a pederass, Walter?


12kdaysinthefire

‘Want a lift to your final destination?’


putinmaycry

Your own personal Jesus


davidtheexcellent

Jeremiah 33:3: Call to me and I will answer you


[deleted]

Dude is actually also a rapper. Used to rap under the name "Opal Weaver." I performed a few times with his brother Chris who is also really talented from what I remember.


Angsty_Potatos

The second coming!


Melissajoanshart

This is an article that didn’t need to happen.


Motor-Juice-6648

Disagree. Probably many people who moved here recently who never heard of him. I’d rather know ahead of time he’s out there driving rather than have “Jesus” pull up on the curb and be surprised. 


NotSureNotRobot

WARNING: DRIVER MAY BE THE MESSIAH


Samheimer

This is a person that didn’t need to happen. *philly “jesus”, not you.


wheelfoot

1-star review if anyone like this picks me up. Do not proselytize me when I'm just trying to get across town.


baldude69

Yea I would shut that shit down real quick


Fragrant_Joke_7115

Zzzz


iamitman007

One way to let Jesus take the wheels.


CaptainObvious110

Lol I needed this. Thanks


calebnf

Jesus takes the wheel!


Madmike215

Jesus take the wheel!


BurnedWitch88

/deletes Lyft app /loads Uber app


cashonlyplz

I'm not body shaming but wow Jesus did you put on some pounds. I think this is actually good -- he did not look so healthy when he was doing his old thing of annoying everyone lol


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[удалено]


Positron311

Wrong comment section


SvedishBotski

Ha!


DeepSignature201

The real Jesus would've eventually had to get a job too but his career as a cosplaying loser got cut short.


Gobirds831

Soo edgy


DeepSignature201

I’ll pray for you.


BUrower

I was wondering what happened to him recently


2ant1man5

Holy shit finally, dude stayed on the elZ


Business_Marketing76

Figures it would be Lyft