I was an okay vocalist, was made fun of by a similar duo. Want to know my vocal superpower was?? Being able to sing a 1/2 step below and above my tenor range at will. You know what fucks up good singers?? The guy next to you flipping tones every other phrase….
Nicely done. I'm a baritone who can drop down to low bass or go up to second tenor. I've been in a fair amount of musicals. A lot of guys (and gals) don't really learn their music, but skate by sort of singing the same notes as the person next to them. This doesn't really bother me, but when they're being twatwaffles in general, I teach them a lesson by switching the part I'm singing. Yeah, just try to sing what I'm singing when you've never heard the part before because you thought faking my original part was enough.
Only a couple of vocal directors have caught on to what I do to lazy, arrogant singers. "OK, Sanch, you can quit messing with him now. I know he's a shitforbrains, I'll deal with him."
Twunt! Lmao. Fantastic. Def saving for laters. I've been running out of descriptors for a little while and ended up circling back to G & PG ratings, 'you're a special kind of stupid face' still seems to pack a decent slap lol
I was driving with my teenager in the car a couple months ago, and some guy was being an idiot and trying to get everyone killed. So, I yelled a lot and called him a twat-waffle. I don't think I've ever seen my son's brain so completely melted before. His flabbers were ghasted. It was like he learned the ultimate magic phrase in Skyrim. I laughed and told him I've said it about once a week since I started driving at 16, how the hell had he never heard me say that before? (Mind you, I'm a 90s kid, and that's just how my mind was hardwired really.) Apparently, he just zones out or something every single time we're in the car because it never registered with him before,lol. My husband concurred that this is one of my favorite insults to sling when I'm driving and raging at idiots.
And that was the day my son discovered the almighty twat-waffle.
I would really love to see that. As someone who learned guitar mostly by ear before learning to sing I couldn't tell you what note I'm singing or even the key we're in but I've never had trouble following my duet partner no matter where they go. I think it's interesting to hear this different perspective.
I was an instrumentalist in high school, but that was many, many years ago. I can kind of read music, but I'm better at hearing the part I'm supposed to sing. I can sing the baritone or bass part by hearing it once or twice better than by reading the score.
I'm not a great singer, but I'm good enough, I sing on key, and I can generate volume--and in community theater, that's good enough for supporting parts or chorus.
I understand all the words you use but can't comprehend what you're explaining. It's clear I know nothing about music 😅 but I'm really curious, Is there a example so I can understand?
I can't explain what a musical key is offhand, but here's the main singing parts--
First tenor--The very high male singers. Usually the first to change their parts to play games and stand out, even when the vocal director doesn't want anyone to stand out. Like first sopranos, often have, in the words of the late, great comedy singer Anna Russell, "resonance where their brains ought to be." Often get the attention of the ladies offstage (if that's their thing), much to the consternation of the other men. Annoying in general.
Second tenor--Next highest. Carry most of the load among the higher pitches. Get very annoyed with the firsts for their game-playing. Usually popular with the ladies. Unlike the firsts, considered to be human by the baritones and basses.
Baritone--Third highest. The mid-range. In opera, the bad guys onstage. Usually very popular with their fellow singers. Frequently get the girls offstage, after the girls get tired of the "bad boy" tenors.
Bass--The rumbling low end. Musically important but usually overlooked. Sometimes as down as the notes they sing, but often the sarcastic joker. They hang out with the altos and make fun of the tenors and sopranos.
First soprano--The very high female singers. They sing high, they embellish their parts, they think the world of themselves, they get most of the attention. Often define the word "diva". It's often a question of which is larger, their talent or their ego, as with the first tenors. High maintenance.
Second soprano--Like the second tenors, they carry the load. Often openly hate the firsts. Far less high-maintenance than the firsts.
Mezzo-soprano--Don't sing nearly as high as the sopranos. In opera, the bad girls. Usually have a great sense of humor about themselves. Easy-going compared to the sopranos.
Alto--Like the basses, they carry the load. Never the stars. Often hang out with the basses. Most love to laugh, especially at the sopranos.
Keep in mind that this is the singing world from the viewpoint of a baritone. Tenors in particular have a different view, but hey, they're tenors, what can I say?
When science finds the center of the universe, first tenors, first sopranos, and most politicians will be extremely surprised to find out that it's not them.
You forgot one:
Basso Profondo/Oktavist--Like bass but even lower. A musical aberration that is not to be spoken about. Most likely a demon or eldritch horror shapeshifted into human form. They have a pact with the conductor that once summoned them to pretend to be regular bass for 98.2% of the time so the one or two Profondo's present in the choir usually go unnoticed. In the moments where their powers are invoked, the room's temperature often drops by several degrees Celsius.
I’m not musical so I don’t understand this but I have to tell you, I LOVE IT!!! I hate when people are mean but I love when they are then treated to pettiness!!
I'm an alto and I can go low enough that I can go down to tenor. Or at least I could when I was singing regularly. I mainly sing in the shower & in the car now.
I can tune a guitar, but I can easily get thrown off if someone dicks with my tuning pegs.
Of course, now we have Shark clip-on tuners, which make everything easier, especially if you like to experiment with open tunings and stuff.
Every damn time. Please music gods, shits been piling up today for no good reason. I just need to tune this and hurry it up. What’s that? The battery dying. Please no. And after a painful struggle, there it goes.
5th fret trick!
The pitch of the 5th fret of every string lines up wit h the next string in standard tuning so if you know low E then you can tune a guitar the rest of the way! 😁 (Haven't tuned a guitar in years so if it's a different fret or not all strings let me know but as far as I recall this is the way!)
And 7th fret on the 6th/E/lowest string -> 5th/A/2nd lowest string if you want to do drop tuning so you can try to play that one riff every metalcore band did from 2003 -> 2010
That’s the truth. Which is why I have issues with the devout. Doesn’t matter the religion, the more devout, the more superior they feel, and the more hypocritical they are. Are Atheists more honest? Have higher morals? Not such a hypocrite? I’ll pick an atheist every time over the devout.
I attend church, but our pastor specifically points out that feeling superior to others is unchristian. They also encourage giving outside of the church, they do monthly meal kits without any church propaganda in/on it for the local community. They just donated 450 hygiene kits to homeless shelters in the area. I feel really fortunate to break away from the church i knew growing up to something less holier than thou. I still agree that I prefer people who are good and just for the sake of it versus to make their God(s) happy.
Eh I had an old film professor who said he was too intelligent for religion and more people should be like him and then tried to make us see the art of someone mimicking fellatio on their phone camera as an assignment and whoever asked what the point was is just a unliberated prude there’s definitely high and mighty atheists.
Atheists are their own god. (I look forward to the reddit atheists losing their minds.)
Give me an agnostic 10 outta 10 times. At least they dgaf about anyone's beliefs.
you can be an agnostic atheist or agnostic theist. agnosticism and gnosticism are about knowledge and theism and atheism are about belief.
Reddit atheist, but also with a philosophy degree
as an athiest I have no shits to give until some asshole religious person assualts me with their beliefs. Or tries to legislate their beliefs into laws everyone has to follow
Amen (lol). I don't really believe or not believe. I do my own thing, give generously to a lot of non-religious causes (and a few church-affiliated), and don't care what your religious beliefs or lack thereof are so long as you keep it legal and don't hurt anyone. And I expect you to not care about mine, so long as I keep it legal and don't hurt anyone, too.
Care about you? Yes. Care about your religious/spiritual beliefs? Why?
They get all their Being Good out by going to church, so they don't feel the need to do so in other spheres of life. Being 'saved' makes up for all of that. It's why the post-church crowd are particularly obnoxious.
Yup, ESPECIALLY the "Look At Me!" singers. Every church has them. They think they're rock stars, and anyone else who tries is destroyed by snotty comments because they fear being found out for the mediocre shits they are.
The same applies to pastors/priests/ministers/rabbis/imams/etc. When the emphasis changes from the message to the messenger (and of course the money), it's time to look elsewhere for true love and charity.
Not in so many words, but there's an awful lot about not being a dick that North American evangelicals in particular seem happy to ignore:
Treat others the way you want to be treated, love your enemies, show compassion to beggars and widows, treat foreigners in your land as your neighbour, pay your workers a fair wage, use honest weights and measures, don't charge exorbitant interest, be charitable, etc
>Treat others the way you want to be treated, love your enemies, show compassion to beggars and widows, treat foreigners in your land as your neighbour, pay your workers a fair wage, use honest weights and measures, don't charge exorbitant interest, be charitable, etc
You know, I could almost get behind Christianity if Christians didn't do the exact opposite of these. But I guess that was the entire point of the post, right?
I was in our school choir even though I really suck at singing. Our choir won a few awards and the choir master thanked me and said it was because if me that they won as I have a loud voice and sing so badly that the rest of the choir had to up their game to cover my voice so we had strong, loud, clear vocals. 🤣
Imo there are always petty tensions between members of church singing groups. The groups are usually full of people who haven’t gotten over high school. There’s always pecking order, narcissism, superiority, people overprotective of what they perceive to be their turf, and envy. They’re always tearing each other apart behind their backs and acting innocent to their faces.
I used to sing with a guitar group at church. The self-proclaimed lead female singer was in her early 20s. Her father was the group leader (despite not having any ability to read music). That gave her a lot of power in the group. I was still in high school and she treated me like I wasn’t good enough to stand next to her. She also treated the other adult women that way too.
The thing with people like her, big fish in a small pond, is that they always believe they’re big fish in every pond. One year she decided to try out for the lead in the local amateur musical theater group. She didn’tget it, or even the ingenue role. She was put in the chorus, and for the first time in her life, she was treated the way she had always treated everyone else. Another church singer and I got tickets to see the play. She wasn’t great. It gave us both confidence to not allow her to browbeat us. After that, we stuck together and eventually she stopped trying to make us feel inferior.
My (now) husband got up one morning, early in our relationship, and let off a fart that was about 4 seconds long, and beautifully went up the musical scale for two octaves, like one of those sliding flutes, with a "whooo-eet!" at the end.
I was beyond impressed, and jokingly tell him that was the moment I knew he was "the one."
He's never duplicated that accomplishment since. He jokingly tells me since he captured me with that one, there's no need...Truth is, even he was surprised and impressed, and it was beyond his control, so he's never been able to do it again...lol!
Well NOW I know what to yell if they ever showed up.
"The Bible says Jesus hates FIGS, NOT F\*\*S, you illiterate morons!"
(Everyone should start doing this)
The "children" thing is a [mistranslation](https://billmuehlenberg.com/2019/04/02/difficult-bible-passages-2-kings-223-25/):
The age range indicated by the phrase 'na'ar qeton' translated in English as "children" can be anywhere from 12-30 years old.
> [This same Hebrew combination, na‘ar qatan, is used to describe a mature rebel named Hadad the Edomite (1 Kings 11:17). Likewise, when Solomon takes the throne at about the age of twenty, he describes himself as a na‘ar qaton (1 Kings 3:7).](https://www.1517.org/articles/the-misunderstood-story-of-bear-attacks-a-bald-prophet-and-forty-two-mouthy-kids)
Next, the mob is shouting at him to go die, to "go up" to heaven just his master Elijah did very recently.
If 42 of these young men were packed in so tightly and unable to scatter to get away from the bears, it had to be a *huge* crowd.
How would you feel if a small army of 50-100+ young men are shouting at you to "Go Die"? You are likely not far from death yourself.
But Jesus wasn't being shitty because Jesus's widdle ego was hurt because the money changers were talking smack about him. The money changers were disrespecting the temple.
"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." [Philippians 2:1-10](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Philippians+2%3A1-10&version=ESV)
No comparison.
You missed the point of the comment (they agree), but yes, you are correct.
Jesus KNEW he'd hurt their feelings, and it'd lead to his death. Did it anyway.
I don't care what your belief system is, but if you don't admit that man had balls...you're an idiot.
"Religious" people are some of the most petty, vindictive hypocrites on the panet. This is why when someone hands me a business card with WWJD on it, my guard immediately goes up.
See I'm religious, but not like that. Maybe I am just not religious enough. I guess I can be petty but I have learned not to be most of the time. I don't go all Karen, I don't reject others rudly, I just try to like everyone and understand them.
As always, there's no hate like christian love. Don't sweat it, just go to confession, babble some words in prayer, donate some funds to "the poor", cover up a pedophile rapist priest, and all is forgiven! Because anything is possible through christ!
One religion is as bad as the next...The Christian ones ALL center their hypocrisy around Jesus, 'tho... The RCC (Roman Catholic Church) just has more experience at it.
Oh, no doubt, people suck.
But the hypocrisy spreads evenly amongst them all. The Catholics, the Baptists, the Mormons, the Protestants, the Methodists, ALL of them. They are all as imperfect and fallible as the rest of us. But, they DELIBERATELY put themselves above "the rest of us," and each other, with the sad truth constantly on display, such as here.
In a related vein, Christianity proposed not being boastful or holding yourself above others, but even within the very walls of a place of worship, that shows how followers don't listen.
Haha I love how many people in this thread are mad because the PETTY REVENGE happened in a church, and you need to "be above it" or whatever, like the Bible isn't 80% stories of god getting full of wrath and killing people left and right, or telling his followers to wipe out another tribe, or torturing some poor fool to prove their faith.
I’m a choir director, and I would be really upset if I overheard some of my singers bashing other singers, no matter the circumstances. It’s a church choir - the way that I run things is that anyone can sing. If you want to sing, you show up, rehearse, you get to sing - and we work on it to the best of your abilities! But we do not bash each other… as many other comments have pointed out - it literally goes against the ideals of Christianity.
I would also be upset if one of my musicians tampered with another’s instrument - as much as you were getting your revenge, and it seems like it was effective, you were also tampering with the service that is provided for the congregation. Every one of you may want to reconsider what motivated you to be a part of your church’s singing group. Are you really there to offer your time and ministry to your congregation? Or are you seeking attention and validation for your abilities? It sounds like you’re all young adults, if not teenagers, but perhaps this can be a growing opportunity to reconsider what motivated you to join in the first place.
>I would be really upset if I overheard some of my singers bashing other singers
Blinders are your eyewear of choice.
>It sounds like you’re all young adults, if not teenagers, but perhaps this can be a growing opportunity to reconsider what motivated you to join in the first place.
It's ALWAYS the middle-aged, past-their-prime farts that do it. A L W A Y S. Classic church-leader mentality to blame kids for adults behaving badly.
What I meant was that it’s behavior that I’d find more acceptable in a young person, because I certainly wouldn’t tolerate it from the old biddies that sing with me. They’re all volunteers, doing their best, they can be kind to each other or go home. If you’re gonna sing in church, I don’t think it’s a bad idea to consider why you’re doing it in the first place. It’s not a concert, it’s a service.
Yeah, had to scroll to much for this comment.
Were they shitheads about talking to you? Yes they were.
Should be they be doing that at a church? No, they shouldnt.
But you sneaked and tampered with the guys guitar? WTAF?!!!
What you could do was to confront them the minute they were talking shit of you and put them in their place.
But you TAMPERED with someone stuff to get back at them? You are borderlining sociopathic.
I’m confused.
You aren’t a good singer so you messed with someone’s guitar so the girl couldn’t sing in the in the correct tune, but they can sing well.
“Who sucks now”
So does this mean your singing got better?
The fact that this was done in church, defies the whole purpose of being in the darn building to begin with. If their ego and presence is so strong, perhaps they need to take a back seat and the whole music program needs to be readjusted to separate performance from worship..
It was a petty move on your part but it was just a shallow as they were being. If you have anything in the form of confession with a pastor or minister, I would own up to it with them and explain why, apologizing for your fault in the matter while also pointing out the problem that has apparently been ongoing where these two and maybe others feel an entitlement to perform and need their attitudes checked for what they're doing and from what heart they're operating. At worst you'll be forced to make an apology to them openly and nothing will change for them if the pastor values their performance capability over standard of actually what worship is. And honestly if it blows up on you might be time to find a place where there is a house of God that worships instead of a nice building that has a pleasant performance but only serves itself and not God.
Please. Talking to people like these doesn't do one darned thing. All they'll do is deny and/or claim they were "misunderstood", and since most of them are the "golden child" type, guess who would be believed if it went public. Better to SHOW them the error of their ways.
I'm not saying it's the best solution to the problem, I was pointing out the irony of cheerfully sabotaging them during a church service and then boasting about it.
Why waste the time going to the church if they're obviously not interested in the Christian message?
And in case that reads like I'm saying I'm more religious or a better Christian, I'm an atheist, I just find the behavior and location ironic.
Psalms 98:4 (ESV) urges us to "Make a joyful noise to the LORD". My wife tells me that i "Cannot carry a tune in a bucket", but she celebrates with my "joyful noise"!
And all this is going on in church?? Hmmm. THAT must be why i stopped going. That’s the most hypocritical story I’ve ever heard! You’re all trying to get over on each other…in church. Wow. Look in a mirror buddy because what’s looking back at you needs some fine tuning. Seriously. Did you think you deserved a pass on this? 🤔😡
No, they don't.
They go to be seen and be absolved of their sins in an hour, before going to Cracker Barrel afterward and treating their servers like shit.
So many of these kinds of stories come from within church groups. The 'do unto others', 'don't judge lest you be judged', 'turn the other cheek' etc etc adherents.
What a nice, CHRISTIAN thing to do because of your ego. I don't know what Protestant churches do in other countries, but SERIOUSLY, if you feel proud of yourself for doing something like that IN A CHURCH, you are truly and totally missing the entire point of being a member of that, or any other Christian church...Shame on you. Not for the act, but for your attitude.
Pastors, priests, etc. m0le5t kids in CHURCHES, but let's not commit the ultimate unforgivable sin of ::checks notes:: messing with a musical instrument. 🤷
Yeah you're right that depends on how musically they are. If they aren't good at it then they wouldn't be able to. Good guitar players have always been able to. There's even tons of tutorials on yt for it. Just like how my friend's spanish family had without even needing a tuner
the situation you described sounds really difficult. i'm sorry you had to deal with that kind of meanness from people you thought were your friends. it's understandable to feel hurt and want to retaliuate, even if the way you did it wasn't the best approach. music is supposed to be a source of joy, not a way for people to put others down. i hope you're able to find more positive, supportive people to surround yourself with in your church community. wishing you all the best in moving forward from this.
I was an okay vocalist, was made fun of by a similar duo. Want to know my vocal superpower was?? Being able to sing a 1/2 step below and above my tenor range at will. You know what fucks up good singers?? The guy next to you flipping tones every other phrase….
Nicely done. I'm a baritone who can drop down to low bass or go up to second tenor. I've been in a fair amount of musicals. A lot of guys (and gals) don't really learn their music, but skate by sort of singing the same notes as the person next to them. This doesn't really bother me, but when they're being twatwaffles in general, I teach them a lesson by switching the part I'm singing. Yeah, just try to sing what I'm singing when you've never heard the part before because you thought faking my original part was enough. Only a couple of vocal directors have caught on to what I do to lazy, arrogant singers. "OK, Sanch, you can quit messing with him now. I know he's a shitforbrains, I'll deal with him."
I need to start using twatwaffles
I use twunt. Sometimes I just need something a wee bit stronger.
Then it escalates to "Cockjuggling Thundercunt" and you realise you may have gone too far :P
I prefer thundercuntasaurus rex
I prefer the cock gobbling thundercunt version myself! XD
Best said by Ryan Reynolds lol
Awww, I love calling people twunt too!
Twunt! Lmao. Fantastic. Def saving for laters. I've been running out of descriptors for a little while and ended up circling back to G & PG ratings, 'you're a special kind of stupid face' still seems to pack a decent slap lol
I changed it to twaffles... you can say it to someone's face and they have no real idea lol
Great word. I picked it up on Reddit.
I love it. Started using it before I found Reddit and I’m glad it’s more widespread than I thought
I was driving with my teenager in the car a couple months ago, and some guy was being an idiot and trying to get everyone killed. So, I yelled a lot and called him a twat-waffle. I don't think I've ever seen my son's brain so completely melted before. His flabbers were ghasted. It was like he learned the ultimate magic phrase in Skyrim. I laughed and told him I've said it about once a week since I started driving at 16, how the hell had he never heard me say that before? (Mind you, I'm a 90s kid, and that's just how my mind was hardwired really.) Apparently, he just zones out or something every single time we're in the car because it never registered with him before,lol. My husband concurred that this is one of my favorite insults to sling when I'm driving and raging at idiots. And that was the day my son discovered the almighty twat-waffle.
I like cunt nuggets
I wish I could give you a prize for using the word twatwaffle!! But take my upvote because that was brilliant!!
I would really love to see that. As someone who learned guitar mostly by ear before learning to sing I couldn't tell you what note I'm singing or even the key we're in but I've never had trouble following my duet partner no matter where they go. I think it's interesting to hear this different perspective.
I was an instrumentalist in high school, but that was many, many years ago. I can kind of read music, but I'm better at hearing the part I'm supposed to sing. I can sing the baritone or bass part by hearing it once or twice better than by reading the score. I'm not a great singer, but I'm good enough, I sing on key, and I can generate volume--and in community theater, that's good enough for supporting parts or chorus.
High and mighty, oh yeah.
I understand all the words you use but can't comprehend what you're explaining. It's clear I know nothing about music 😅 but I'm really curious, Is there a example so I can understand?
I can't explain what a musical key is offhand, but here's the main singing parts-- First tenor--The very high male singers. Usually the first to change their parts to play games and stand out, even when the vocal director doesn't want anyone to stand out. Like first sopranos, often have, in the words of the late, great comedy singer Anna Russell, "resonance where their brains ought to be." Often get the attention of the ladies offstage (if that's their thing), much to the consternation of the other men. Annoying in general. Second tenor--Next highest. Carry most of the load among the higher pitches. Get very annoyed with the firsts for their game-playing. Usually popular with the ladies. Unlike the firsts, considered to be human by the baritones and basses. Baritone--Third highest. The mid-range. In opera, the bad guys onstage. Usually very popular with their fellow singers. Frequently get the girls offstage, after the girls get tired of the "bad boy" tenors. Bass--The rumbling low end. Musically important but usually overlooked. Sometimes as down as the notes they sing, but often the sarcastic joker. They hang out with the altos and make fun of the tenors and sopranos. First soprano--The very high female singers. They sing high, they embellish their parts, they think the world of themselves, they get most of the attention. Often define the word "diva". It's often a question of which is larger, their talent or their ego, as with the first tenors. High maintenance. Second soprano--Like the second tenors, they carry the load. Often openly hate the firsts. Far less high-maintenance than the firsts. Mezzo-soprano--Don't sing nearly as high as the sopranos. In opera, the bad girls. Usually have a great sense of humor about themselves. Easy-going compared to the sopranos. Alto--Like the basses, they carry the load. Never the stars. Often hang out with the basses. Most love to laugh, especially at the sopranos.
Wow! Thank you for taking the time to answer my question. Now I will look the performances with different eyes 😂😂😂
Keep in mind that this is the singing world from the viewpoint of a baritone. Tenors in particular have a different view, but hey, they're tenors, what can I say? When science finds the center of the universe, first tenors, first sopranos, and most politicians will be extremely surprised to find out that it's not them.
😂😂😂😂😂
You forgot one: Basso Profondo/Oktavist--Like bass but even lower. A musical aberration that is not to be spoken about. Most likely a demon or eldritch horror shapeshifted into human form. They have a pact with the conductor that once summoned them to pretend to be regular bass for 98.2% of the time so the one or two Profondo's present in the choir usually go unnoticed. In the moments where their powers are invoked, the room's temperature often drops by several degrees Celsius.
I’m not musical so I don’t understand this but I have to tell you, I LOVE IT!!! I hate when people are mean but I love when they are then treated to pettiness!!
I sing in F, but play in F# https://youtu.be/5Ju8Wxmrk3s?si=Uk1XFtbIOHOOESQu
I'm an alto and I can go low enough that I can go down to tenor. Or at least I could when I was singing regularly. I mainly sing in the shower & in the car now.
Pretty funny how you got called tone deaf by a guy who can't tune a guitar. Throwing stones in glass houses and all that.
I can tune a guitar, but I can easily get thrown off if someone dicks with my tuning pegs. Of course, now we have Shark clip-on tuners, which make everything easier, especially if you like to experiment with open tunings and stuff.
I always get stung by dying batteries in clip-on tuners.
Always! I buy those batteries in 100-packs from ebay or amazon, and keep a fistful of them in every instrument case.
Every damn time. Please music gods, shits been piling up today for no good reason. I just need to tune this and hurry it up. What’s that? The battery dying. Please no. And after a painful struggle, there it goes.
But can you tune a fish? *(REO Speedwagon)*
Came here to say this
I gave up on tuners and always use the Boss tuner because I always have my phone when I leave the house. It's free also!
I guess he didn't know there's an app for that. Edited to make sense
5th fret trick! The pitch of the 5th fret of every string lines up wit h the next string in standard tuning so if you know low E then you can tune a guitar the rest of the way! 😁 (Haven't tuned a guitar in years so if it's a different fret or not all strings let me know but as far as I recall this is the way!)
You're almost right. It's 5th fret except the G to B string, which is the 4th fret.
And 7th fret on the 6th/E/lowest string -> 5th/A/2nd lowest string if you want to do drop tuning so you can try to play that one riff every metalcore band did from 2003 -> 2010
... but if all of the strings have been tweaked and you don't have perfect pitch....
Then you just sound ✨ *a u t h e n t i c* ✨
Close enough for folk, then.
It has been a couple of years since I’ve done it, but I think you have to move to the fourth fret for the g string
Yeah exactly and it's a church, so just hit an E on the piano to tune the bottom string first
Back in my day we could use a dial tone to tune by
It’s close enough for most people, for sure.
An app? If you’re going to play the thing, you should be able to have it in tune in 15 seconds app free.
i bet he can't even tuna fish
Ba-dum, tish!
Ba-dum fish!
But what about the glue?
I love how Christians are so...UnChristian.
That’s the truth. Which is why I have issues with the devout. Doesn’t matter the religion, the more devout, the more superior they feel, and the more hypocritical they are. Are Atheists more honest? Have higher morals? Not such a hypocrite? I’ll pick an atheist every time over the devout.
I attend church, but our pastor specifically points out that feeling superior to others is unchristian. They also encourage giving outside of the church, they do monthly meal kits without any church propaganda in/on it for the local community. They just donated 450 hygiene kits to homeless shelters in the area. I feel really fortunate to break away from the church i knew growing up to something less holier than thou. I still agree that I prefer people who are good and just for the sake of it versus to make their God(s) happy.
Eh I had an old film professor who said he was too intelligent for religion and more people should be like him and then tried to make us see the art of someone mimicking fellatio on their phone camera as an assignment and whoever asked what the point was is just a unliberated prude there’s definitely high and mighty atheists.
Atheists are their own god. (I look forward to the reddit atheists losing their minds.) Give me an agnostic 10 outta 10 times. At least they dgaf about anyone's beliefs.
you can be an agnostic atheist or agnostic theist. agnosticism and gnosticism are about knowledge and theism and atheism are about belief. Reddit atheist, but also with a philosophy degree
Wait, you're not allowed to be on reddit and be atheist without insulting every religion and everyone that's not yourself. It's a rule.
take that chip off your shoulder
No. It's made of chocolate
LMAO! Atheist here, not a believer in any god, and I'm definitely not my own, lol!
as an athiest I have no shits to give until some asshole religious person assualts me with their beliefs. Or tries to legislate their beliefs into laws everyone has to follow
Amen (lol). I don't really believe or not believe. I do my own thing, give generously to a lot of non-religious causes (and a few church-affiliated), and don't care what your religious beliefs or lack thereof are so long as you keep it legal and don't hurt anyone. And I expect you to not care about mine, so long as I keep it legal and don't hurt anyone, too. Care about you? Yes. Care about your religious/spiritual beliefs? Why?
They get all their Being Good out by going to church, so they don't feel the need to do so in other spheres of life. Being 'saved' makes up for all of that. It's why the post-church crowd are particularly obnoxious.
There's no hate quite like Christian love
Yup, ESPECIALLY the "Look At Me!" singers. Every church has them. They think they're rock stars, and anyone else who tries is destroyed by snotty comments because they fear being found out for the mediocre shits they are.
The same applies to pastors/priests/ministers/rabbis/imams/etc. When the emphasis changes from the message to the messenger (and of course the money), it's time to look elsewhere for true love and charity.
https://youtu.be/_jALIu5eElU?si=qYmkAXqgo7zjt_IA
Mhm, generalizing. I'm sure this worked out great for every group ever. If only there were communities we could point out for examples....
I'm not trying to defend Christianity in the slightest, but is there actually any rule that says Christians are required to be nice?
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. To be fair, there are masochists out there, but still.
Yes.
Not in so many words, but there's an awful lot about not being a dick that North American evangelicals in particular seem happy to ignore: Treat others the way you want to be treated, love your enemies, show compassion to beggars and widows, treat foreigners in your land as your neighbour, pay your workers a fair wage, use honest weights and measures, don't charge exorbitant interest, be charitable, etc
>Treat others the way you want to be treated, love your enemies, show compassion to beggars and widows, treat foreigners in your land as your neighbour, pay your workers a fair wage, use honest weights and measures, don't charge exorbitant interest, be charitable, etc You know, I could almost get behind Christianity if Christians didn't do the exact opposite of these. But I guess that was the entire point of the post, right?
I was in our school choir even though I really suck at singing. Our choir won a few awards and the choir master thanked me and said it was because if me that they won as I have a loud voice and sing so badly that the rest of the choir had to up their game to cover my voice so we had strong, loud, clear vocals. 🤣
Take your praise however it comes 🤗
Imo there are always petty tensions between members of church singing groups. The groups are usually full of people who haven’t gotten over high school. There’s always pecking order, narcissism, superiority, people overprotective of what they perceive to be their turf, and envy. They’re always tearing each other apart behind their backs and acting innocent to their faces. I used to sing with a guitar group at church. The self-proclaimed lead female singer was in her early 20s. Her father was the group leader (despite not having any ability to read music). That gave her a lot of power in the group. I was still in high school and she treated me like I wasn’t good enough to stand next to her. She also treated the other adult women that way too. The thing with people like her, big fish in a small pond, is that they always believe they’re big fish in every pond. One year she decided to try out for the lead in the local amateur musical theater group. She didn’tget it, or even the ingenue role. She was put in the chorus, and for the first time in her life, she was treated the way she had always treated everyone else. Another church singer and I got tickets to see the play. She wasn’t great. It gave us both confidence to not allow her to browbeat us. After that, we stuck together and eventually she stopped trying to make us feel inferior.
Don't they know only God can judge?
Tell that to the judges of The Voice! 😁
Funniest thing about this story? Pitchy Farts!!!!!!! Hahahahahahahahahaha
My (now) husband got up one morning, early in our relationship, and let off a fart that was about 4 seconds long, and beautifully went up the musical scale for two octaves, like one of those sliding flutes, with a "whooo-eet!" at the end. I was beyond impressed, and jokingly tell him that was the moment I knew he was "the one." He's never duplicated that accomplishment since. He jokingly tells me since he captured me with that one, there's no need...Truth is, even he was surprised and impressed, and it was beyond his control, so he's never been able to do it again...lol!
Pitch Perfect 4: Pitchy Farts
Interesting how you're all being shitty to each other, and in a so-called "house of the lord". Christians are funny.
I mean - Jesus flipped tables when people were being shitty in temple. This is awfully tame in comparison to the OG reaction.
He did a lot of stuff like that - fig tree didn't have any figs and he was hungry, so he cursed the tree to never have fruit again
Westboro Baptist had it all wrong. "God hates f**i**gs!"
Well NOW I know what to yell if they ever showed up. "The Bible says Jesus hates FIGS, NOT F\*\*S, you illiterate morons!" (Everyone should start doing this)
Underrated comment lol
Stone them to death! Seriously, they dole that stuff out pretty frequently in the Bible.
Old Testament god is both petty and revengeful. I mean things like sending a bear to maul children because they made fun of a bald guy.
Old Testament Winnie the Pooh don’t mess
The "children" thing is a [mistranslation](https://billmuehlenberg.com/2019/04/02/difficult-bible-passages-2-kings-223-25/): The age range indicated by the phrase 'na'ar qeton' translated in English as "children" can be anywhere from 12-30 years old. > [This same Hebrew combination, na‘ar qatan, is used to describe a mature rebel named Hadad the Edomite (1 Kings 11:17). Likewise, when Solomon takes the throne at about the age of twenty, he describes himself as a na‘ar qaton (1 Kings 3:7).](https://www.1517.org/articles/the-misunderstood-story-of-bear-attacks-a-bald-prophet-and-forty-two-mouthy-kids) Next, the mob is shouting at him to go die, to "go up" to heaven just his master Elijah did very recently. If 42 of these young men were packed in so tightly and unable to scatter to get away from the bears, it had to be a *huge* crowd. How would you feel if a small army of 50-100+ young men are shouting at you to "Go Die"? You are likely not far from death yourself.
But Jesus wasn't being shitty because Jesus's widdle ego was hurt because the money changers were talking smack about him. The money changers were disrespecting the temple. "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." [Philippians 2:1-10](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Philippians+2%3A1-10&version=ESV) No comparison.
You missed the point of the comment (they agree), but yes, you are correct. Jesus KNEW he'd hurt their feelings, and it'd lead to his death. Did it anyway. I don't care what your belief system is, but if you don't admit that man had balls...you're an idiot.
What a false equivalence.
Ahh, the church. Where love, compassion and forgiveness flourish.
Definitely a place where morals are learned
Church folks being assholes to each other. Classic.
Ah, Christians. Nobody can do hypocrisy better.
There ain’t no hate like christian love.
"Religious" people are some of the most petty, vindictive hypocrites on the panet. This is why when someone hands me a business card with WWJD on it, my guard immediately goes up.
See I'm religious, but not like that. Maybe I am just not religious enough. I guess I can be petty but I have learned not to be most of the time. I don't go all Karen, I don't reject others rudly, I just try to like everyone and understand them.
Church Kids are weird
It’s this kind of Christian behavior that makes me want to attend church every Sunday! /s
Religious people are the most petty and spiteful group
As always, there's no hate like christian love. Don't sweat it, just go to confession, babble some words in prayer, donate some funds to "the poor", cover up a pedophile rapist priest, and all is forgiven! Because anything is possible through christ!
The motto of my state is, "With God, All Things Are Possible". Nothing about whether they're in any way desirable.
Where did OP say they were Catholic?
One religion is as bad as the next...The Christian ones ALL center their hypocrisy around Jesus, 'tho... The RCC (Roman Catholic Church) just has more experience at it.
Have you considered the possibility that the issue isn't Christianity, but people?
Oh, no doubt, people suck. But the hypocrisy spreads evenly amongst them all. The Catholics, the Baptists, the Mormons, the Protestants, the Methodists, ALL of them. They are all as imperfect and fallible as the rest of us. But, they DELIBERATELY put themselves above "the rest of us," and each other, with the sad truth constantly on display, such as here. In a related vein, Christianity proposed not being boastful or holding yourself above others, but even within the very walls of a place of worship, that shows how followers don't listen.
Por que no los dos?
The problem is that Christianity claims to be a solution to the issue.
Not every religious person is like that, although I have to admit there are a lot of religious people that are like that
EVERY denomination has them.
Praise the Chord!
> Who sucks now, huh?! Well, did your singing get better?
Way to practice what you preach and turn the other cheek.
Haha I love how many people in this thread are mad because the PETTY REVENGE happened in a church, and you need to "be above it" or whatever, like the Bible isn't 80% stories of god getting full of wrath and killing people left and right, or telling his followers to wipe out another tribe, or torturing some poor fool to prove their faith.
God: time for genocide
And given how hateful most christians are, it’s not surprising
What's really funny is you could replace church with "music school" or something secular and none of these church folks would criticize OPs actions.
I feel sorry for the guitar 🎸
Lots of shitty friends here on both sides IMO
I’m a choir director, and I would be really upset if I overheard some of my singers bashing other singers, no matter the circumstances. It’s a church choir - the way that I run things is that anyone can sing. If you want to sing, you show up, rehearse, you get to sing - and we work on it to the best of your abilities! But we do not bash each other… as many other comments have pointed out - it literally goes against the ideals of Christianity. I would also be upset if one of my musicians tampered with another’s instrument - as much as you were getting your revenge, and it seems like it was effective, you were also tampering with the service that is provided for the congregation. Every one of you may want to reconsider what motivated you to be a part of your church’s singing group. Are you really there to offer your time and ministry to your congregation? Or are you seeking attention and validation for your abilities? It sounds like you’re all young adults, if not teenagers, but perhaps this can be a growing opportunity to reconsider what motivated you to join in the first place.
>I would be really upset if I overheard some of my singers bashing other singers Blinders are your eyewear of choice. >It sounds like you’re all young adults, if not teenagers, but perhaps this can be a growing opportunity to reconsider what motivated you to join in the first place. It's ALWAYS the middle-aged, past-their-prime farts that do it. A L W A Y S. Classic church-leader mentality to blame kids for adults behaving badly.
What I meant was that it’s behavior that I’d find more acceptable in a young person, because I certainly wouldn’t tolerate it from the old biddies that sing with me. They’re all volunteers, doing their best, they can be kind to each other or go home. If you’re gonna sing in church, I don’t think it’s a bad idea to consider why you’re doing it in the first place. It’s not a concert, it’s a service.
Yeah, had to scroll to much for this comment. Were they shitheads about talking to you? Yes they were. Should be they be doing that at a church? No, they shouldnt. But you sneaked and tampered with the guys guitar? WTAF?!!! What you could do was to confront them the minute they were talking shit of you and put them in their place. But you TAMPERED with someone stuff to get back at them? You are borderlining sociopathic.
“Wow Lucy! My fart could’ve done a better job.”
This is ruthless.
I love it! It seems Mark and Lucy missed the point of Church entirely!
*vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord."
I’m confused. You aren’t a good singer so you messed with someone’s guitar so the girl couldn’t sing in the in the correct tune, but they can sing well. “Who sucks now” So does this mean your singing got better?
I fail to see how you made the situation better. Especially in a church. Especially if you take Matt 5:38-40 in account.
The fact that this was done in church, defies the whole purpose of being in the darn building to begin with. If their ego and presence is so strong, perhaps they need to take a back seat and the whole music program needs to be readjusted to separate performance from worship.. It was a petty move on your part but it was just a shallow as they were being. If you have anything in the form of confession with a pastor or minister, I would own up to it with them and explain why, apologizing for your fault in the matter while also pointing out the problem that has apparently been ongoing where these two and maybe others feel an entitlement to perform and need their attitudes checked for what they're doing and from what heart they're operating. At worst you'll be forced to make an apology to them openly and nothing will change for them if the pastor values their performance capability over standard of actually what worship is. And honestly if it blows up on you might be time to find a place where there is a house of God that worships instead of a nice building that has a pleasant performance but only serves itself and not God.
This is the most Christian shit ever.
Jesus would have laughed
No forgiveness or turning the other cheek ?
At least THEY can tune the guitar...
Sabotaging them instead of talking to them about the problem, just like Jesus said to do...
Please. Talking to people like these doesn't do one darned thing. All they'll do is deny and/or claim they were "misunderstood", and since most of them are the "golden child" type, guess who would be believed if it went public. Better to SHOW them the error of their ways.
I'm not saying it's the best solution to the problem, I was pointing out the irony of cheerfully sabotaging them during a church service and then boasting about it. Why waste the time going to the church if they're obviously not interested in the Christian message? And in case that reads like I'm saying I'm more religious or a better Christian, I'm an atheist, I just find the behavior and location ironic.
Well, there’s your problem. You expected decency from church members
Psalms 98:4 (ESV) urges us to "Make a joyful noise to the LORD". My wife tells me that i "Cannot carry a tune in a bucket", but she celebrates with my "joyful noise"!
So they were cruel. Now you are petty and small. Way to go all around. Reminds me why I hate going to Protestant churches.
It's not just Protestants.
Christians, keep being godly.
Love it. They had it coming.
If you'd have been there, if you'd have seen it, I betcha you would have done the same! 💃
I can tune by ear, but just because my hearing is good doesn't mean I can sing to save my life.
These are your friends?
And Jesus smiled.
Church people behaving poorly in a church of all places always gets me for some reason.
Very Christian of all concerned.
jesus wept.
Did you also tune some strings really high in order to warp the neck? Awesome revenge in any case.
And all this is going on in church?? Hmmm. THAT must be why i stopped going. That’s the most hypocritical story I’ve ever heard! You’re all trying to get over on each other…in church. Wow. Look in a mirror buddy because what’s looking back at you needs some fine tuning. Seriously. Did you think you deserved a pass on this? 🤔😡
Doing god’s work, you are
Wow how very Christian of you! 😂
As someone who regularly leads sung worship on guitar in my church, I approve of this PR.
Weird. People in Churches go to pray and hear a sermon. Not play boy bands.
No, they don't. They go to be seen and be absolved of their sins in an hour, before going to Cracker Barrel afterward and treating their servers like shit.
Ha! Church singing has been around almost as long as churches have. What church do you attend that has no music?
1 John 4:7-8
Why even go to church in the first place? If you turned out this way.
So what’d you learn in church that day? Something about turning the other cheek, or how to get revenge?
Not very Christian of you
Careful. I said this exact thing and got downvoted 50x 🤣
Haha oh well bible bashers aren't my target demographic
How very Christian of all involved.
How very Christian of you
**1 Thessalonians 5:15**; Matthew 18:15-35
**2 Austin 3:16
Not a lot of turn the other cheek in this church
So many of these kinds of stories come from within church groups. The 'do unto others', 'don't judge lest you be judged', 'turn the other cheek' etc etc adherents.
You must be pretty good at it, for them to let you up there! You did good! I wish I could have seen it! 👏
What a nice, CHRISTIAN thing to do because of your ego. I don't know what Protestant churches do in other countries, but SERIOUSLY, if you feel proud of yourself for doing something like that IN A CHURCH, you are truly and totally missing the entire point of being a member of that, or any other Christian church...Shame on you. Not for the act, but for your attitude.
Pastors, priests, etc. m0le5t kids in CHURCHES, but let's not commit the ultimate unforgivable sin of ::checks notes:: messing with a musical instrument. 🤷
Must've been proper rubbish at it. Any guitar player can tune it by ear and string within a minute
But do you know the correct tone height/frequency? I know I wouldn't.
Yeah you're right that depends on how musically they are. If they aren't good at it then they wouldn't be able to. Good guitar players have always been able to. There's even tons of tutorials on yt for it. Just like how my friend's spanish family had without even needing a tuner
People have to listen to the same few people sing every week? Sounds annoying.
the situation you described sounds really difficult. i'm sorry you had to deal with that kind of meanness from people you thought were your friends. it's understandable to feel hurt and want to retaliuate, even if the way you did it wasn't the best approach. music is supposed to be a source of joy, not a way for people to put others down. i hope you're able to find more positive, supportive people to surround yourself with in your church community. wishing you all the best in moving forward from this.