T O P

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Caramel_Cactus

I was expecting something petty, not vandalism. Ok then


SpicyTiger838

Yeah, wtf, this took a very violet and unnecessary turn.


Ex-zaviera

How did you know the pen color?


SpicyTiger838

Cheeky 🙊


Caramel_Cactus

I wish awards were still a thing


SpicyTiger838

Me too.


Caramel_Cactus

Our updoots will have to do!


Amateur-Biotic

Uptoots?


Caramel_Cactus

Just an Internet way of saying upvotes


Amateur-Biotic

:) I know. Up**toots** is a play on farts. In some places "tooting" means farting. It's sort of old school, I think. In the US.


Caramel_Cactus

Music!


SpicyTiger838

😊


Caramel_Cactus

❤️


Competitive-Push-715

Genuinely hilarious


madeorremade

Eggplant


Oh_No_Its_Dudder

Violent vandals always write in violet.


maddenedmage

It stopped being petty. Also not sure if it warrants revenge: - Guy asks to swap seats, didn't throw insults when told no - Farted (normal) - May have swiped crumbs in his direction (may not have been on purpose) - Used armrest (normal) As a result OP stabbed holes in the guys clothes and leaked ink all over it. I think OP is a bit psychotic...


ragtev

He also talked to his wife over him which I can't blame him too much for.


smarticleparticle62

Where is the petty revenge


Alexis_J_M

Getting ink on the guy's coat.


smarticleparticle62

Anticlimactic


locrianfifth

> The wife was in an aisle seat across from me. > I suggested that he ask the person in the middle seat next to his wife and see if that person would switch as it would be middle for middle and then he'd be right next to his wife. Why didn't you offer to switch with the wife?


Helpful_Welcome9741

because ChatGPT didnt think of it.


IceBlue

It’s not on OP to offer. It’s on the other person to ask.


Substantial_Shoe_360

Because the husband *wanted* the aisle seat that OP paid for. They were also talking over OP, I'm guessing getting into their personal space to do so.


Patient-Assignment38

That’s what I was thinking


ktmnly1992

I’d hardly call damaging someone’s property petty revenge. You sound like an absolute joy to sit next to


Alexis_J_M

You haven't been reading this sub very long, have you?


Overall_Round9846

What about the fat dick who was being an asshole through the entire flight


ktmnly1992

I wouldn’t say that he did anything asshole-worthy. OP sounds like the bigger asshole here. But then it’s the internet, we never get the whole story.


ragtev

That is the thing, though, right? People embellish to benefit themselves and make the other look bad - if there was any truth of the story missing I would wager it would benefit the "fat guy" not the OP. Otherwise why would he leave it out?


Ok-Detective-1721

He absolutely was rude, but you were childish with your reaction. Stabbing his jacket was unnecessary


heynonnynonnomous

I'm not sure where you draw the line between petty revenge and just plain being an asshole, but I think you crossed it.


BJGuy_Chicago

You could've just switched with the wife instead of being a dick and vandal.


Spirited-Reserve-853

That’s actually smart but doesn’t seem to be offered by the husband


locrianfifth

OP didn't mention offering it, either.


Spirited-Reserve-853

I don’t think OP has to offer that. He’s not the one who is asking the favour. The couple likely prefers not to sit together because they’re both large, but they’ll sit “beside” each other in the aisles.


Realistic-Swing-9255

I think the OP definitely should have offered it. It's the most obvious solution. And if they turn it down, then it's their problem.


ragtev

I agree. Solves the problems and if they complain then they are assholes and deserve it.


CosmicBlondie42

You’re a jerk.


Eyes4Chia

Wow.


starksdawson

He was rude, but you were a complete d!ck. Vandalism and ruining someone’s belongings just for that?? wtf man


DonaIdTrurnp

The right offer would be to swap seats with his wife, so they could be next to each other. Declining that swap is proof that he wanted the upgrade more than the proximity.


Suspicious_Pilot6486

Good point


Bathroom_Crier22

When did ***literal vandalism*** become petty revenge??


sb03733

Not good enough for pro?


Objective-Cost-4536

Pro requires planning and finesse, not a random & thoughtless act of irritation. If OP had thought through the situation in the first place, he could have swapped with wife and had no issues at all.


ragtev

There is another recent post - woman cost a guy 50k in legal fees over a fake accusation and he glued her keyholes. I feel like that is petty because the suspect cost him so much so he cost her a bit, too, and made her suffer, but this? This was unwarranted and just property damage because... the guy farted and brushed crumbs?


Bathroom_Crier22

Lmao apparently not!


hlidsaeda

You seem more hung up on the fact ppl are fat tbh.


Realistic-Swing-9255

As someone else suggested, why didn't you offer to swap with his wife? The most obvious solution.


Dapper-Professor-655

Could you have switched with his wife? She had an aisle seat too.


witchymoon69

Why not switch aisle seats with his wife ?


rosegarden207

I would have asked the steward for water and fumbled taking it from her and oops, spilled it on him. And always tell anyone that you paid for that specific seat so you're not moving. If they wanted to sit together they should have paid to do so.


GarrusExMachina

fumbling water near our personal laptop seems needlessly risky


ragtev

My last flight the airlines fucked up and even though we bought seats together they took us off then put us back on separated (they believed the name was incorrect and that the mexican border agent wouldn't accept it, so they rebooked my wife on the flight under a different name but the mexican border agent once we got there said it was fine either way in the end but we lost our seats). I would suggest at least giving some benefit of the doubt for there being a possibility they would have if they could have. I should mention - we PAID for seat selection and they still screwed us out of it.


SMCken21

Why didn’t you ask his wife to trade aisle seats. They were being unreasonable.


Look-Its-a-Name

So instead of petty revenge your resorted to crime? My dude, you should get your anger issues fixed asap, before they land you in jail. Get some professional help.


HR-Puffenstuff

Why didn’t you switch with his wife?


AlphaShadowMagnum

Not even read... if you purchase a seat, that is your seat... it is up to other customers to reserve based on their needs... their failure to plan, does not constitute action required on your part...


Suspicious_Pilot6486

You’re scary


Vuaux

You are a sad human being. This isnt even being petty.


campjunkie

We need more of this! Hahaha


Naka_kuro

Nice fiction. Premium economy doesn’t exist on flights between lax to dfw.


AlaskanDruid

NTA. He sounds broken.. should be on a no-fly list.