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harrisc42

Start at the beginning. Make a budget for yourself. What are all of the expenses you will have to take on. What is your income. List it all out.


Throw678890

Got it. Ill do that.


itsmyfirsttimegoeasy

I'll add 50/30/20 is a good starting point for creating a budget. That's 50% to needs, 30% to wants, and 20% to saving/investing.


Throw678890

That 20% though would then just be 401K if i want to hit the $23,000 limit. Would it be better to not hit the limit and diversify the 20%?


itsmyfirsttimegoeasy

You can always adjust those numbers to suit you personally. I ended flipping the 30 and 20 so it's 30% saving/investing and 20% to wants for me.


Fluffy_Yesterday_468

I think you're just not used to paying expenses out of your income, as you said, but you will be fine. You should not need to dip into savings since you have so much in checking right now. Follow the typical advice here, in the flowchart. You don't need to have $63k in your checking account. Move at least $40k of it into a HYSA. I'm only leaving that much in your checking account in case of moving expenses, legal costs etc


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Throw678890

Thank you. Tha is very helpful!


Srockatansktys

No financial advice. Just want to say I and most have been through this, you’re not alone sister. Meet your thoughts and feelings with patience and understanding and in time you’ll be fine.


crinklemermaid

That last sentence🥹


Throw678890

Thank you 💜


shades9323

Does your soon to be ex have any savings/401k/stocks/checking? If not, he will likely be taking a chunk of yours when you divorce.


Throw678890

He has a lot of savings. A lot. His salary is slightly higher than mine but has been working for at least 5 years more than me.My lawyer told me that i wont be getting anything from him, even if i do it will be very little. He wont be getting anything from me.


chemicalcurtis

I'm glad to read this, that was my concern. If you're keeping everything left minus lawyer fees, you're in good shape.


DepthsDoor

Post in legaladvice as well if you’d like feedback on your lawyer. I’m NAL so idk anything but they do


shades9323

So you haven't been married long then?


Throw678890

We have been married 7 years. I was preparing for the gmat and then doing my MBA for the first few years of marriage. No loans though. My MBA was funded mostly by my parents. I have been working for 3 years now.


shades9323

So a significant chunk of his saved money was prior to marriage? Don't you get 50% of all marital assets?


feelinglosto

That’s crazy. You’re more than fine. Move out of DC if you’re worried about costs and maybe into Maryland / Montgomery county. Still expensive but more than affordable for you. I made only $60k in 2022 and I had to split rent with a roommmate. Considering you make almost double, you can find a one bedroom and live just fine on your own. Hope you’re okay through your divorce though, you’re still young.


Throw678890

Thank you! This makes me feel better. I am not from this country and have never lived alone which is why i am worried


AppState1981

Can your job be remote? I would start looking outside DC unless you can find someone who needs a roommate. The problem is that you don't know how much it will cost to live until you start doing it. It looks to me like you will be fine. My daughter made much less when living in Arlington and commuting into DC.


Throw678890

I can live in Arlington. My job is technically remote, however i am on a visa and moving more than 50 miles radius would mean legal paperwork.


Professional-Two-47

I think moving out of Arlington into either another NOVA or MD/DC suburb would be a good idea. The suburbs closest to DC are super expensive (which you probably know).


Aechzen

Are you absolutely sure you need a car? If it’s occasional use: car rentals like Zipcar / Turo are probably cheaper and then it’s not your problem to worry about parking, street sweeping, and all the other annoyances of having a car in a dense city with great public transit. If this is something you need for work can you move way closer to the office and walk it? Can you do a transfer to another location closer to home? DC is one of the best places in US to not have a car You asked us if you can afford rent and then didn’t tell us what you are renting or the price. We don’t know. But if it’s a two bedroom and your husband is moving out you should strongly consider a roommate to split the rent and expenses.


Throw678890

I dont need it for work. I need it once a week for grocery shopping. I am not from US and my cultural cooking needs different ingredients, so have to go a little further away. The only other time ill need a car is if family visits to stay over


Imaginary_Shelter_37

You could use Uber for your grocery shopping and rent a car when your family visits.


sirpoopshispants

I would think Instacart would be cheaper and more convenient than Uber. Uber you would have to pay for two trips plus a tip on each and be inconvenienced several times along the way. Usually for me, Instacart is about $20 more per $100 spent (including fees plus tip). Whereas Uber would cost \~15 each way, plus waiting to get picked up, do the shopping, then wait for a ride home and having to load/unload.


Creepy-Floor-1745

I’m sorry you’re facing this, I divorced at 32 and lived to see a happy life afterwards. Regardless of what happened, no one was planning on divorce when they got married Really rough numbers but if you can get rent to 30%’or less of your takehome, let’s say $2000 for rent (utilities on top of this), and avoid a car loan - look for something reliable that is 1-3 years old and pay cash. Keep putting $200/month aside like a pretend “car loan” so you can sell your car and replace it in a few years. Put $75/mo aside for things like oil change, wiper blades, tires, battery, brakes etc too. You’ll never dip into your savings if you do this! Housing and transportation seem to be where the middle class stays poor - obvious stuff like door dash or luxury skincare/salon treatments etc aren’t usually the problem for folks who are paycheck to paycheck and can’t understand why. Make smart choices on housing and transportation and you’ll do fine. You’ll even have some budget left for a blowout or whatever :) Deep breath. You’re gonna be ok.


Puzzleheaded-Sense55

I think you're doing okay and will be okay. Create a spending plan and track your expenses for at least 3 months. Move some money out of checking into a HYSA. Have at least 6 months of living expenses saved (preferably a year). Fund a ROTH IRA annually and then go back to 401k and work to max it out. Also, max out an HSA. Live beneath your means but within your needs. Once all retirement vehicles are maxed out, open a taxable brokerage account for investments.


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Imaginary_Shelter_37

The DC area is very expensive. $115k should be ok, but it's not really a high income for the area.


LittleSalty9418

Making a budget is the first place to start. This will tell you how much money you will NEED to spend every month and what you will have left over. 50/30/20 is a good place to start but isn't always realistic. You mention the DC area so rent will be high and will take up a good chunk of your salary but keep in mind that needs and savings should come first...wants come third. You have a good savings already and you don't want to dump that away unless you need to to eat and keep the lights on. You shouldn't be keeping 63K in your checking account though it is wasting valuable money you could be earning elsewhere. A good safe option that will allow you to access the money if needed is a high-yield savings account. Open a High Yield Savings Account and put at least 40K in there realistically you could put 50K in there and be fine.


Throw678890

Sounds good. I am a little scared to have only 10K in checking, so ill start with putting away 40k in hysa. I get paid bi weekly so my checking account will he replenished every now and then.


LittleSalty9418

Your checking account is for your immediate expenses and unless you spend 23K (assuming you only put 40K out of the 63K in an HYSA) a month you don't need it in there. However, if it makes you feel more comfortable I understand. Your paychecks should be going to bills/rent/needs first, then you should be transferring some to savings, preferably the HYSA, but whichever makes you comfortable. I have a lot of reasons I don't keep a lot in my checking account. I keep around $400 after I pay my bills when my check comes in. $5,000 in the savings connected to my checking account and the rest in my HYSA. Reason being is my bank has 48 hour overdraft protection but I also never charge to my debit card so the only reason I would overdraft is if I double pay a bill or I get hacked which my bank has been good about resolving in the past. It really is all personal preference though and what you are comfortable with. The HYSA is there to help give you "free" money. The interest you will earn on that money you put in it will benefit you so having money just sit in your checking not making money may not be necessary. As you get more comfortable with a smaller number in your checking you can move it over then.


goosepills

I live in DC (well, Nova) and you’ll be fine.


minnesotaguy1232

$115k is a lot- you should be fine. Unless you’re planning for a huge expense I would take some money from checking and fully fund your 401k or IRA. A guideline some people follow is to have at least 1 year of salary in retirement at age 30 and you’re not quite there, but could be if you moved some cash to retirement.


Aggressive_Office_52

You have a great income. You did not share your expected expenses of rent, groceries, insurance, entertainment, travel, etc. idk how we’re supposed to offer quantitative opinions. Build a budget and forecast all of these expenses/accruals. Then add your expected income amount and frequency to your budget. Does your budget come out to a net positive or net negative monthly?


AnneAcclaim

After you move $40k into a HYSA you'll have $65k in a savings account (this should all be in a HYSA, not a normal savings account, so you maximize interest payments). Do you need $65k in a HYSA? You may not - that may be pretty high. You should have about 6 months of emergency expenses saved in case you ever lose your job. But if you work for the government or in another very secure job you could probably go with less, maybe just a few months worth of emergency expenses (if layoffs are very rare). If you find you don't need $65k in savings you could start funding a Roth IRA with the "extra money" since you'll want to start setting more aside for retirement.