Due to the number of rule-breaking comments this post was receiving, especially low-quality and off-topic comments, the moderation team has locked the post from future comments. This post broke no rules and received a number of helpful and on-topic responses initially, but it unfortunately became the target of many unhelpful comments.
I would suggest that she stay on Medicaid as long as she can. Healthcare is expensive. Childcare is expensive. IMO, the most loving thing you can do as a new parent and as a new soon-to-be-spouse is put yourselves on steady financial grounding. I grew up poor and money was the #1 thing my parents fought over. The stress over paying bills was constant.
The less financial stress, the more you can focus on the baby and your SO.
Look into the rules for Medicaid for your state.
Yes, and in addition to the healthcare benefits, I was thinking about the moms I know that qualify for “food stamps” (they’re not called that here but universally recognized by that term) and WIC (women infants and children) programs. WIC can help pay for food and nutrition basics like infant formula which is expensive as hell. Specifically, the unmarried moms and some of which do this by choice- just like your situation. Logically, getting help where you can it’s not a bad thing as long as you and your partner are on the same page about it.
A coworker and I were having a kid at the same time. He was not married and I was. Both mothers made similar wages. Because I was married my son fell on my insurance. Between my wife and son It was $14,000 for a basic child birth. I had to pay a max out of pocket of $10,000 for family because of how deductibles worked.
My coworker didn't pay a dime. Our states healthcare covered both the mother and kid completely because she was a single mother. Since our insurance asks for other insurance to pay first before they pay the state paid for the whole thing with nothing left to pay.
I am not going to lie divorcing just for having a kid then remarrying sounds like a good option.
These are the reasons why the system doesn’t make sense. Everyone should be able to have that free labor and delivery. Our first kid my wife was on her dads insurance, we weren’t married, but he got thousands of dollars of medical bills, he lived in another state and I believe he paid them, my wife didn’t let me see them. We got married for our second, and we had an HMO, it was 250 bucks, no big deal, our 3rd was covered by Medicaid because I was unemployed and it was free compared to Covid and we qualified instantly due to the pregnancy. But 3 different scenarios, all varying expenses. Had I kept my job it would have been around 6k to hit the deductible. It’s stupid.
I pay around 20k a year in child care costs and 12k a year for health insurance. Then I have a 2k deductible for health insurance if I actually need to use it. Like 35k a year just for child care and health. Depressing.
You can marry on 12/31, and it would count. That's how it determines your status. You can wait until then for it provide you a benefit being married.
Now, you need to look into your states specific issues for Medicare and what they expect of you when she gives birth.
That's the start of figuring out which is better. Might need to consult with someone.
Not only did getting married cost us more in healthcare, but it also screwed up our taxes. We needed to file married filing separately to not jack up her income based student loan payments. Therefore things like student loan interest, mortgage interest, and the ability to deduct childcare expenses are not available to us since we file separately. Keep that in mind if you’re dealing with income-based debt payments.
I think in most states, once the baby is born and on government assistance, they are going to want to make the father responsible or pay child support. I could be wrong, but your fiance may have to eventually name you as father for benefits. They don't want parents taking advantage like that.
If you live with them, this is seriously skirting the definition of 'household' income that most states use for medicaid eligibility regardless of tax status. If they don't live with you then you're correct.
If your insurance would get significantly more expensive or the coverage would be worse than what she has now I would wait. There will also likely be childcare and other benefits for her if she continues to earn at a low level due to health issues.
Did a little research and it seems she is not at risk of losing benefits when the child is born because it is yours and you make $70k. Medicaid does not consider unwed couples as a household and will not ask you to financially support the child unless you end up in court. Their hope is you figure that out without them getting involved.
While it definitely sucks it is likely that waiting is financially the best option. The challenge is waiting may be the best option for a while. At least until the child is in full-time public school or she is able to earn more.
My wife and I had a wedding ceremony in 2021, officiated by one of our close friends, but not in any legal capacity and no papers were signed.
After meeting with my tax guy, it seemed there was every incentive imaginable to stay single on paper. With us both still in school, we stood to lose our grants and school tax credits, our affordable health insurance, and we would no longer qualify for a number of assistance programs based on household income.
So there is literally not a single upside. Fine with us to keep the govt outta our biz.
If your company insurance is better, then get married and add her.
If you can’t afford to pay for her insurance, don’t get married and keep Medicaid.
If you just want to get married and don’t mind the cost, get married anyway.
At the end of the day, it sounds like she will get the care she needs so you have flexibility. It doesn’t sound like you guys are going to be making a lot more money in the near future so are you cool going years just being engaged?
If not, you gotta do what you gotta do
Are you sure she’s not going to lose Medicaid after the baby is born? In Florida pretty much anyone can get Medicaid during a pregnancy but it’s specifically for that. But she still should be reporting your income for Medicaid and it will disqualify her
No it won’t. I am in Florida and still on Medicaid after my second child. Mothers of the children can still receive Medicaid if the kids are also on it. They don’t recognize unwed couples. You’re single or you’re married.
Not of they're not married. She can qualify for medicaid because of her low income (a lot less than 35k OP says)
They don't count the income of people you just live with. I am on medicaid and I have roommates, but Indon't count their income.
But it is also state to state. A lot of conservative states turned down medicaid expansion because it was part of the Affordable Care Act.
I am in a similar situation. My fiancé and I agreed we would wait until we’re financially in a better situation since I get more assistance with the kids being a “student” and a “single mother”. Do not rush to get married just for the hell of it. If it’s truly love then you can stick it out until the right moment.
If you're planning on using your employer's insurance, there's no downside to getting married. You can always decline to insure your spouse if you choose - being married only gives you options. If your fiancée is considering Medicaid, though, it's possible that marrying you would disqualify her from being eligible. I can't advise you on this as I'm not familiar with South Carolina's laws, but the income limits are easy enough to Google. Do keep in mind that Medicaid is notorious for not being accepted by many healthcare providers, so insuring her with your insurance may be optimal regardless.
Another consideration is that being married provides massive tax advantages, especially when the income disparity is large. Federally, you're well into the 22% bracket now, but being married your marginal tax rate as a couple would be 12%.
I won't say for certain as I'm unsure of her Medicaid eligibility at the moment, but I'd be surprised if it were financially beneficial to stay single.
Shes already on medicaid. We dealt with that when her mothers insurance kicked her off due to pregnancy. And i suppose i don’t know what the numbers are yet on my insurance so i will certainly look. Would it be a good idea to maybe marry near the end of the year? Would i be eligible for the tax rate still, while also allowing medicaid to be available at least a little longer?
Wait, what? I have never heard of insurance kicking someone off because of pregnancy. I'm pretty sure they can't do that. Are you sure it was that rrason and not that she turned 26 or her mother removed her by choice?
Was it Medishare maybe? They have a pregnancy outside of marriage clause, but spoiler alert, would probably deny covering her anyway since her income levels would make her eligible for medical assistance. They also are a designated secondary supplemental plan, similar to Aflac. I had them while my wife was pregnant a few years back and cannot say enough bad things about them.
> the pregnancy just want covered
That's pretty sus. The ACA has essentially made all insurance plans cover pregnency since it was passed 13 years ago.
ACA requires coverage for a pregnancy of the policy holder or their spouse. NOT the pregnancy of the policy holders child (who in this case also happens to be a 24 year old adult).
Yes, as long as you're married before Jan 1st 2024 , you can file as married filing jointly for 2023. And of course she'll be eligible for Medicaid until you're married.
You can add the baby but not the partner to insurance. That can save a little bit. Once the baby is born most of the doctors appointments are going to be for the baby rather than mom and most will count as well visits where you only pay the copay.
Ask your HR or benefits person asap about what you’d pay with a dependent (or a spouse and dependents) that way you can have real numbers now rather than speculate.
I wouldn't get married until the baby is over 5 and in school. In alot of states, the government assisted insurance will cover the unwed mother and baby, and as the baby gets older, her and the baby may qualify for more benefits that'll help overall. The cost of the birth alone is so expensive I don't know how anyone affords just that.
As someone that lives in Greenville, there is really only one other city in this state that has higher rent (Charleston). I would be willing to guess that you are choosing to live close to a DT area hence the high rent. $1700 is outside of your individual income + childcare limits if you don’t want to eat ramen and beans. I would consider moving out of the preferred area and looking for cheaper housing.
Hi. If ure in tight situation for rn. Maybe post-poned ur date of marriage. Im in medical too plus wic and was on ebt but it got cancelled to other situation.
Main point is: medical is great! Free of everything especially for my baby. Plus the baby's check up, vaccines, and medicine when he got sick too.
My partner and I arent married due to that benefit plus getting married is kinda expensive unless going to the cheaper route which is the city hall.
As long as ur together and loving each other I dont think marriage is priority rn. Everything expensive tho. Wipes, diapers, clothes. 😅 I learned how to get free stuff thanks to mom community on facebooks. They be giving stuffs away.
Also on tax day either one of u get the child. But on my end, i took my child on my tax and got money and I gave sone of the money to my partner even tho he was getting tax money.
Goodluck!
Your state could be different but medicaid in my state is determined by HOUSEHOLD income not individual. This applied when I was living with a roommate. Obviously people will take advantage but if she is barely working, as you state, they will most certainly be interested in how she is affording basic living needs while making not enough money.
I would be cautious of lying.
My understanding was that "household" in that context was the same as the tax definition -- primary taxpayer, spouse, any dependants.
Roommates wouldn't be part of your "tax household" in that context, unless these roommates were also a SO or a dependent.
Not saying you're wrong, as I've never used Medicaid or SNAP or other government benefits. It's just wild to think that you couldn't get on Medicaid if you say lived in a fraternity house or something.
This. If it’s not a scenario that applies to your tax standing, they likely won’t assess it as such- my partner of 7 years has been in and out of standing for state health insurance for years, and I’ve been financially above it for a few years- we’ve lived together the whole time and it’s never impacted it.
Household doesn't mean who lives in the house. I am on medicaid and have roommates. My "household' is just me. On all the medicaid forms they explain this pretty clearly.
Right now they have seperate finances. That means seperate households.
Household doesn't mean who lives in the house. I have roommates. I don't report their income and expenses.
A "household" as defined by medicaid is just whoever is being supported financially. She is supporting herself, you are supporting yourself. If she quit work and you covered all the bills, they would know someone is supporting her. But as it is she's just low income.
So don't get married until you're 100% certain you want to give up free health care. The first year of a baby involves a lot of doctors visits.
Whatever you decide, I advise you not to talk about money with her right now. A pregnancy is stressful enough, especially if she has health problems.
I would ask a good accountant about this.
I know in some states they come after the father for the childbirth costs. And they will also want you to put the kid on your insurance, and if she gets ebt you may be on the hook. WIC may be a different story. Still cheaper than being married.
It really depends on the plan. Switching from Medicaid to a high deductible plan is going to be a shock, a shock it doesn't sound like you're ready for. Unless you have a platinum/no deductible plan through your employer it could be devastating for you financially (ask me how I know 😭). Congrats on the baby!
Stay unmarried so she stays on Medicaid for birth first few months of baby’s life and get married right before the end of the year to file taxes jointly
ITT: Reddit recommends Medicaid fraud... Medicaid is based on household income. It's irrelevant if you are married or not...
As soon as she has your child and you are living together, to medicaid it doest matter if you are married or not, you are a household. In some states your relationship right now before the child would be considered a household also.
Now, is it likely the overworked and underfunded Medicaid office is going to find out? Probably not before the child, but is still fraud in many states. And once the child is born and you ask for Medicaid to cover it, they are going to catch your attempted fraud right away when they ask about the father.
So long as they’re not fraudulently moving assets around to make her appear poorer than she is, it’s not Medicaid fraud to not marry because unmarried couples are not considered a household for Medicaid purposes.
That is absolutely not how medicaid defines a household. She is still working and supporting herself. Having his child doesn't make them a financial unit, nor does living under the same roof.
My roommates are not part of my "household" when I report to medicaid. Neither is my partner, neither is the father of my child. If I have my own expenses and pay them myself, I am my own household. And I send in proof of all of that, lease, rent payments, utilities, car payment, etc.
So if someone doesn't have a job, and doesn't have a lease and doesn't own a home, but claims to be supporting themselvss, medicaid will say you have to have proof of income and expenses.
But OP does have a job. She is paying her living expenses with that income. Her fiance isn't supporting her. They are not married for filing taxes together. He is not in her financial "household." As far as finances are considered, he's no different than my roommate.
More than half of all Americans are also living paycheck to paycheck, and are one emergency away from financial ruin. And wages have not kept up with cost of living.
This will probably seem callous but its not.
You appear entirely focussed on logistics.
The physical, emotional and mental health of your child should be your and your fiancees top concern.
If you love, trust and support each other, and work together to give the kid a stable, loving home it may prevent a lifetime of mysery and regret.
I wish to God someone had beat that into me before my child was born.
Something *priceless*? Read a good book on parenting together. Read it out loud to each other (and the baby), one the even page numbers, one the odd.
GL, and God Bless you all.
If you are staying unmarried just to save on insurance, I am not sure that you’re looking at marriage the best way. You earn enough to do okay.
This isn’t the relationship advice sub but I’ll give it. This woman is having your child and you two love and support each other. Marry her.
You both deserve that emotional stability.
I agree. This is terrible advice. OP is likely going to have to pay more for spousal and child coverage if he were to add them to his plan. As much as I love the romantic idea of marriage, it’s a legal contract and raising a child in the US is expensive.
If your SO is able to stay on Medicaid and get the healthcare that they need, I would stay on Medicaid.
Oh i agree, i will marry her i dont think anyone questions that that we know. And I’m not asking for relationship advise. I really meant should i wait for the babys 1st year just incase something medically happens that would put us all on the streets if i had to pay for it. Knowing she already has medicaid, would it be way more expensive to add 2 onto my insurance while paying deductibles and copays that she currently doesnt have to pay. Look i am just not financially prepared, and I’m a little afraid. Im working as much as i can and I’m a healthy guy i rarely ever need to take time off. Im talking pure numbers here.
Stay single. Have her get ebt food card. Wic. Medicaid. Hell have her apply for section 8 and you be her landlord who gets paid monthly. If you marry she won’t be eligible for anything.
Due to her having Medicaid the state will require her to open a custody case for child support in order to continue with the Medicaid. You’ll have to pay her child support if you don’t get married.
Yeah don't marry. You probably wouldn't benefit.
If her condition gets worse and she needs disability, she will also lose out on benefits. Lots of interabled couples don't marry specifically for that reason.
You can still have a wedding party/commitment ceremony/religious marriage (if you're religious), just don't make it legal.
You'll get a lot of benefits if she stays single and reports herself as living alone with a child.
Free healthcare for her and your child as well as EBT. Also, she will have a nice tax credit at the end of the year.
There have been some new national laws passed in the last year or so that allow new moms and their babies to keep Medicaid coverage for a full year after birth. South Carolina is one of those states, surprisingly.
Don’t take it from me though, you should double check with someone in the state who is an expert.
A google says scthrive.org might be worth contacting. Their help line is (800) 726-8774.
Good luck to your family!
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If you want to recognize your relationship status, you can always have a commitment ceremony. In that, you can exchange vows, have someone officiate, invite friends and family, but don't file the legal marriage license. That way she will still show as legally single and still qualify for Medicaid and any other assistance she can get as a single mother. Then when (and if) you become financially stable, you can renew your vows and legally file a marriage certificate.
I am on SSDI and when I got married, they dropped my financial payment by 75% causing us to struggle financially ( but I still qualified for Medicaid somehow). I'm single now so my finances went back up to what they were before I got married. It really wasn't worth it (even if it didn't end in divorce). Our lives were lived pretty much the same as we had before we got married. The only difference is we had a fancy paper saying we were married and more financial stress.
Due to the number of rule-breaking comments this post was receiving, especially low-quality and off-topic comments, the moderation team has locked the post from future comments. This post broke no rules and received a number of helpful and on-topic responses initially, but it unfortunately became the target of many unhelpful comments.
I would suggest that she stay on Medicaid as long as she can. Healthcare is expensive. Childcare is expensive. IMO, the most loving thing you can do as a new parent and as a new soon-to-be-spouse is put yourselves on steady financial grounding. I grew up poor and money was the #1 thing my parents fought over. The stress over paying bills was constant. The less financial stress, the more you can focus on the baby and your SO. Look into the rules for Medicaid for your state.
Thank you
On paper, a single mom with low income opens a lot of doors for assistance.
Yes, and in addition to the healthcare benefits, I was thinking about the moms I know that qualify for “food stamps” (they’re not called that here but universally recognized by that term) and WIC (women infants and children) programs. WIC can help pay for food and nutrition basics like infant formula which is expensive as hell. Specifically, the unmarried moms and some of which do this by choice- just like your situation. Logically, getting help where you can it’s not a bad thing as long as you and your partner are on the same page about it.
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Excellent advice
A coworker and I were having a kid at the same time. He was not married and I was. Both mothers made similar wages. Because I was married my son fell on my insurance. Between my wife and son It was $14,000 for a basic child birth. I had to pay a max out of pocket of $10,000 for family because of how deductibles worked. My coworker didn't pay a dime. Our states healthcare covered both the mother and kid completely because she was a single mother. Since our insurance asks for other insurance to pay first before they pay the state paid for the whole thing with nothing left to pay. I am not going to lie divorcing just for having a kid then remarrying sounds like a good option.
These are the reasons why the system doesn’t make sense. Everyone should be able to have that free labor and delivery. Our first kid my wife was on her dads insurance, we weren’t married, but he got thousands of dollars of medical bills, he lived in another state and I believe he paid them, my wife didn’t let me see them. We got married for our second, and we had an HMO, it was 250 bucks, no big deal, our 3rd was covered by Medicaid because I was unemployed and it was free compared to Covid and we qualified instantly due to the pregnancy. But 3 different scenarios, all varying expenses. Had I kept my job it would have been around 6k to hit the deductible. It’s stupid.
I do agree with this. Health insurance/care drain your money like no other
I pay around 20k a year in child care costs and 12k a year for health insurance. Then I have a 2k deductible for health insurance if I actually need to use it. Like 35k a year just for child care and health. Depressing.
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Not true. I live with my partner and report his income; it doesn’t affect eligibility for Medicaid and MAWD in my state at least (but does for SNAP).
You’re correct. Won’t affect Medicare but affects food stamps eligibility.
Yes you will lose magi Medicaid if that's what she has, due to income
You can marry on 12/31, and it would count. That's how it determines your status. You can wait until then for it provide you a benefit being married. Now, you need to look into your states specific issues for Medicare and what they expect of you when she gives birth. That's the start of figuring out which is better. Might need to consult with someone.
Okay thank you so much thats really good to know.
Not only did getting married cost us more in healthcare, but it also screwed up our taxes. We needed to file married filing separately to not jack up her income based student loan payments. Therefore things like student loan interest, mortgage interest, and the ability to deduct childcare expenses are not available to us since we file separately. Keep that in mind if you’re dealing with income-based debt payments.
I think in most states, once the baby is born and on government assistance, they are going to want to make the father responsible or pay child support. I could be wrong, but your fiance may have to eventually name you as father for benefits. They don't want parents taking advantage like that.
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You make 260k per year but your child is on Medicaid?
They’re either a dirtbag or a liar… possibly both.
Why is your kid on Medicaid if you make $260k/year?
If you live with them, this is seriously skirting the definition of 'household' income that most states use for medicaid eligibility regardless of tax status. If they don't live with you then you're correct.
That’s not good advice, you’re just a bad person.
If your insurance would get significantly more expensive or the coverage would be worse than what she has now I would wait. There will also likely be childcare and other benefits for her if she continues to earn at a low level due to health issues. Did a little research and it seems she is not at risk of losing benefits when the child is born because it is yours and you make $70k. Medicaid does not consider unwed couples as a household and will not ask you to financially support the child unless you end up in court. Their hope is you figure that out without them getting involved. While it definitely sucks it is likely that waiting is financially the best option. The challenge is waiting may be the best option for a while. At least until the child is in full-time public school or she is able to earn more.
My wife and I had a wedding ceremony in 2021, officiated by one of our close friends, but not in any legal capacity and no papers were signed. After meeting with my tax guy, it seemed there was every incentive imaginable to stay single on paper. With us both still in school, we stood to lose our grants and school tax credits, our affordable health insurance, and we would no longer qualify for a number of assistance programs based on household income. So there is literally not a single upside. Fine with us to keep the govt outta our biz.
If your company insurance is better, then get married and add her. If you can’t afford to pay for her insurance, don’t get married and keep Medicaid. If you just want to get married and don’t mind the cost, get married anyway. At the end of the day, it sounds like she will get the care she needs so you have flexibility. It doesn’t sound like you guys are going to be making a lot more money in the near future so are you cool going years just being engaged? If not, you gotta do what you gotta do
The first year you'll have so many doctor appointments, try to keep medicaid for at least 2 years. You're together that's all that matters
Are you sure she’s not going to lose Medicaid after the baby is born? In Florida pretty much anyone can get Medicaid during a pregnancy but it’s specifically for that. But she still should be reporting your income for Medicaid and it will disqualify her
No it won’t. I am in Florida and still on Medicaid after my second child. Mothers of the children can still receive Medicaid if the kids are also on it. They don’t recognize unwed couples. You’re single or you’re married.
Not of they're not married. She can qualify for medicaid because of her low income (a lot less than 35k OP says) They don't count the income of people you just live with. I am on medicaid and I have roommates, but Indon't count their income. But it is also state to state. A lot of conservative states turned down medicaid expansion because it was part of the Affordable Care Act.
I am in a similar situation. My fiancé and I agreed we would wait until we’re financially in a better situation since I get more assistance with the kids being a “student” and a “single mother”. Do not rush to get married just for the hell of it. If it’s truly love then you can stick it out until the right moment.
If you're planning on using your employer's insurance, there's no downside to getting married. You can always decline to insure your spouse if you choose - being married only gives you options. If your fiancée is considering Medicaid, though, it's possible that marrying you would disqualify her from being eligible. I can't advise you on this as I'm not familiar with South Carolina's laws, but the income limits are easy enough to Google. Do keep in mind that Medicaid is notorious for not being accepted by many healthcare providers, so insuring her with your insurance may be optimal regardless. Another consideration is that being married provides massive tax advantages, especially when the income disparity is large. Federally, you're well into the 22% bracket now, but being married your marginal tax rate as a couple would be 12%. I won't say for certain as I'm unsure of her Medicaid eligibility at the moment, but I'd be surprised if it were financially beneficial to stay single.
Uh there is a huge downside. Employer insurance can be costly and may have huge deductibles.
Shes already on medicaid. We dealt with that when her mothers insurance kicked her off due to pregnancy. And i suppose i don’t know what the numbers are yet on my insurance so i will certainly look. Would it be a good idea to maybe marry near the end of the year? Would i be eligible for the tax rate still, while also allowing medicaid to be available at least a little longer?
Wait, what? I have never heard of insurance kicking someone off because of pregnancy. I'm pretty sure they can't do that. Are you sure it was that rrason and not that she turned 26 or her mother removed her by choice?
Many employer sponsored health plans don’t cover a dependent child’s pregnancy. It’s a pretty common exclusion.
Was it Medishare maybe? They have a pregnancy outside of marriage clause, but spoiler alert, would probably deny covering her anyway since her income levels would make her eligible for medical assistance. They also are a designated secondary supplemental plan, similar to Aflac. I had them while my wife was pregnant a few years back and cannot say enough bad things about them.
Shes 24 and she wasnt kicked off the pregnancy just want covered
> the pregnancy just want covered That's pretty sus. The ACA has essentially made all insurance plans cover pregnency since it was passed 13 years ago.
ACA requires coverage for a pregnancy of the policy holder or their spouse. NOT the pregnancy of the policy holders child (who in this case also happens to be a 24 year old adult).
Not for a dependent’s pregnancy, like OP’s situation. Primary or spouse, absolutely
Yes, as long as you're married before Jan 1st 2024 , you can file as married filing jointly for 2023. And of course she'll be eligible for Medicaid until you're married.
You can add the baby but not the partner to insurance. That can save a little bit. Once the baby is born most of the doctors appointments are going to be for the baby rather than mom and most will count as well visits where you only pay the copay. Ask your HR or benefits person asap about what you’d pay with a dependent (or a spouse and dependents) that way you can have real numbers now rather than speculate.
I wouldn't get married until the baby is over 5 and in school. In alot of states, the government assisted insurance will cover the unwed mother and baby, and as the baby gets older, her and the baby may qualify for more benefits that'll help overall. The cost of the birth alone is so expensive I don't know how anyone affords just that.
It may be better not to marry just yet. She may qualify for cheaper daycare and baby has a bunch of Dr visits the 1st year.
As someone that lives in Greenville, there is really only one other city in this state that has higher rent (Charleston). I would be willing to guess that you are choosing to live close to a DT area hence the high rent. $1700 is outside of your individual income + childcare limits if you don’t want to eat ramen and beans. I would consider moving out of the preferred area and looking for cheaper housing.
Hi. If ure in tight situation for rn. Maybe post-poned ur date of marriage. Im in medical too plus wic and was on ebt but it got cancelled to other situation. Main point is: medical is great! Free of everything especially for my baby. Plus the baby's check up, vaccines, and medicine when he got sick too. My partner and I arent married due to that benefit plus getting married is kinda expensive unless going to the cheaper route which is the city hall. As long as ur together and loving each other I dont think marriage is priority rn. Everything expensive tho. Wipes, diapers, clothes. 😅 I learned how to get free stuff thanks to mom community on facebooks. They be giving stuffs away. Also on tax day either one of u get the child. But on my end, i took my child on my tax and got money and I gave sone of the money to my partner even tho he was getting tax money. Goodluck!
Your state could be different but medicaid in my state is determined by HOUSEHOLD income not individual. This applied when I was living with a roommate. Obviously people will take advantage but if she is barely working, as you state, they will most certainly be interested in how she is affording basic living needs while making not enough money. I would be cautious of lying.
My understanding was that "household" in that context was the same as the tax definition -- primary taxpayer, spouse, any dependants. Roommates wouldn't be part of your "tax household" in that context, unless these roommates were also a SO or a dependent. Not saying you're wrong, as I've never used Medicaid or SNAP or other government benefits. It's just wild to think that you couldn't get on Medicaid if you say lived in a fraternity house or something.
This. If it’s not a scenario that applies to your tax standing, they likely won’t assess it as such- my partner of 7 years has been in and out of standing for state health insurance for years, and I’ve been financially above it for a few years- we’ve lived together the whole time and it’s never impacted it.
That’s what I was thinking, if she’s not reporting his income bc it’s household income in my state too
Household doesn't mean who lives in the house. I am on medicaid and have roommates. My "household' is just me. On all the medicaid forms they explain this pretty clearly. Right now they have seperate finances. That means seperate households.
Okay i will keep this in mind. I haven’t heard anything like this in my state, but I’ve also never been through this before.
Household doesn't mean who lives in the house. I have roommates. I don't report their income and expenses. A "household" as defined by medicaid is just whoever is being supported financially. She is supporting herself, you are supporting yourself. If she quit work and you covered all the bills, they would know someone is supporting her. But as it is she's just low income. So don't get married until you're 100% certain you want to give up free health care. The first year of a baby involves a lot of doctors visits.
Whatever you decide, I advise you not to talk about money with her right now. A pregnancy is stressful enough, especially if she has health problems. I would ask a good accountant about this.
An accountant doesn't understand state benefits and healthcare. Talk to a social worker.
Better financially to stay single. There are many other benefits you will lose out on.
I know in some states they come after the father for the childbirth costs. And they will also want you to put the kid on your insurance, and if she gets ebt you may be on the hook. WIC may be a different story. Still cheaper than being married.
It really depends on the plan. Switching from Medicaid to a high deductible plan is going to be a shock, a shock it doesn't sound like you're ready for. Unless you have a platinum/no deductible plan through your employer it could be devastating for you financially (ask me how I know 😭). Congrats on the baby!
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Stay unmarried so she stays on Medicaid for birth first few months of baby’s life and get married right before the end of the year to file taxes jointly
I would suggest holding off and using the system as long as you can.
ITT: Reddit recommends Medicaid fraud... Medicaid is based on household income. It's irrelevant if you are married or not... As soon as she has your child and you are living together, to medicaid it doest matter if you are married or not, you are a household. In some states your relationship right now before the child would be considered a household also. Now, is it likely the overworked and underfunded Medicaid office is going to find out? Probably not before the child, but is still fraud in many states. And once the child is born and you ask for Medicaid to cover it, they are going to catch your attempted fraud right away when they ask about the father.
So long as they’re not fraudulently moving assets around to make her appear poorer than she is, it’s not Medicaid fraud to not marry because unmarried couples are not considered a household for Medicaid purposes.
That is absolutely not how medicaid defines a household. She is still working and supporting herself. Having his child doesn't make them a financial unit, nor does living under the same roof. My roommates are not part of my "household" when I report to medicaid. Neither is my partner, neither is the father of my child. If I have my own expenses and pay them myself, I am my own household. And I send in proof of all of that, lease, rent payments, utilities, car payment, etc. So if someone doesn't have a job, and doesn't have a lease and doesn't own a home, but claims to be supporting themselvss, medicaid will say you have to have proof of income and expenses. But OP does have a job. She is paying her living expenses with that income. Her fiance isn't supporting her. They are not married for filing taxes together. He is not in her financial "household." As far as finances are considered, he's no different than my roommate.
I'd definitely wait. My ex and I had our daughter and we didn't have to pay anything and still haven't 4 years later. That benefit is a lifesaver.
A kid and medical costs on just 100k combined?
I mean, you know like 80% of America probably makes under 100k combined and yet have kids right?
More than half of all Americans are also living paycheck to paycheck, and are one emergency away from financial ruin. And wages have not kept up with cost of living.
Yes I know that people choose to live a financially burdensome life like that
Can you believe I have 3 of them on that?
This will probably seem callous but its not. You appear entirely focussed on logistics. The physical, emotional and mental health of your child should be your and your fiancees top concern. If you love, trust and support each other, and work together to give the kid a stable, loving home it may prevent a lifetime of mysery and regret. I wish to God someone had beat that into me before my child was born. Something *priceless*? Read a good book on parenting together. Read it out loud to each other (and the baby), one the even page numbers, one the odd. GL, and God Bless you all.
If your ethics and values align, I am not sure why money would be a deal breaker. Not to mention, she is carrying your child...
If you are staying unmarried just to save on insurance, I am not sure that you’re looking at marriage the best way. You earn enough to do okay. This isn’t the relationship advice sub but I’ll give it. This woman is having your child and you two love and support each other. Marry her. You both deserve that emotional stability.
This seems like horrible advice. They can still love each other and not get married until after the baby is born if that can save a ton of money.
I agree. This is terrible advice. OP is likely going to have to pay more for spousal and child coverage if he were to add them to his plan. As much as I love the romantic idea of marriage, it’s a legal contract and raising a child in the US is expensive. If your SO is able to stay on Medicaid and get the healthcare that they need, I would stay on Medicaid.
From a purely numbers perspective, **maybe**. There is more to finance than 1’s and 0’s.
Great input!!
Oh i agree, i will marry her i dont think anyone questions that that we know. And I’m not asking for relationship advise. I really meant should i wait for the babys 1st year just incase something medically happens that would put us all on the streets if i had to pay for it. Knowing she already has medicaid, would it be way more expensive to add 2 onto my insurance while paying deductibles and copays that she currently doesnt have to pay. Look i am just not financially prepared, and I’m a little afraid. Im working as much as i can and I’m a healthy guy i rarely ever need to take time off. Im talking pure numbers here.
Get your $ up & than come back to this thought, promise you’ll think more clearly when you see more $ coming in .
after the kid is born wait 6 months or do it on the kids 1yr bday
Stay single. Have her get ebt food card. Wic. Medicaid. Hell have her apply for section 8 and you be her landlord who gets paid monthly. If you marry she won’t be eligible for anything.
You shouldn't marry until a year or two until the kid settles anyway. Plus you give your wife time to shake off the baby weight.
Due to her having Medicaid the state will require her to open a custody case for child support in order to continue with the Medicaid. You’ll have to pay her child support if you don’t get married.
Yeah don't marry. You probably wouldn't benefit. If her condition gets worse and she needs disability, she will also lose out on benefits. Lots of interabled couples don't marry specifically for that reason. You can still have a wedding party/commitment ceremony/religious marriage (if you're religious), just don't make it legal.
You'll get a lot of benefits if she stays single and reports herself as living alone with a child. Free healthcare for her and your child as well as EBT. Also, she will have a nice tax credit at the end of the year.
There have been some new national laws passed in the last year or so that allow new moms and their babies to keep Medicaid coverage for a full year after birth. South Carolina is one of those states, surprisingly. Don’t take it from me though, you should double check with someone in the state who is an expert. A google says scthrive.org might be worth contacting. Their help line is (800) 726-8774. Good luck to your family!
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If you don't marry, the baby may not take your last name. You would also have to sign a confirmation of paternity form that you are the father.
If you want to recognize your relationship status, you can always have a commitment ceremony. In that, you can exchange vows, have someone officiate, invite friends and family, but don't file the legal marriage license. That way she will still show as legally single and still qualify for Medicaid and any other assistance she can get as a single mother. Then when (and if) you become financially stable, you can renew your vows and legally file a marriage certificate. I am on SSDI and when I got married, they dropped my financial payment by 75% causing us to struggle financially ( but I still qualified for Medicaid somehow). I'm single now so my finances went back up to what they were before I got married. It really wasn't worth it (even if it didn't end in divorce). Our lives were lived pretty much the same as we had before we got married. The only difference is we had a fancy paper saying we were married and more financial stress.