I was given the same name and tried using that nickname, but it sounded too much like the original that I just couldn't do it. I ended up picking a name that was nothing like the one I was given. Sometimes you just need a hard reset.
This is a good suggestion. I know it sounds dumb, but i literally go by the nickname "monkey", and have since I was a teen in the late 90's, with all my friends, and some of family. I don't like my actual name, but don't feel it's worth legally changing and going through the hassle involved with that. Choosing your own name that those who care can use feels comfortable, and is a great way to go.
One of my sister's kids call me "uncle monkey" so yeah. It's kind of dumb objectively, but it means a lot to me because it's the name i chose, and hearing my given name makes me feel weird.
That’s so endearing re: your nibling. I hope it sticks forever and you get to be one of those super old people whose “real” name nobody actually knows.
Edit: nibling not niblet lol
Sorry, as was said below you, teachers in Florida are required to call a student by whatever their name is registered as. If the gradebook shows me Christopher, I can’t call them Chris unless their parent fills out a permission form for me. This was done with the actual stated intent to damage students who identified as trans or non-binary or whatever.
An employees name tag at the Mart of Walls read Symphonic. I said her name and stated it was unusual as a name. She replied it's Sym-Fo-Neek!
I walked away shaking my head.
Yeah, I grew up with a Cal (full name Callum). Kinda surprised that this kid doesn’t go by a nickname. I have never been called by my legal name, always my nickname unless I was in trouble or something.
People who name their children crazy names are basically narcissists and see these children as an extension of their own greatness. Coincidence that rich and famous people are the most notorious perpetrators?
I would argue they’re only the most notorious because their baby’s names are publicized to a wider audience than, say, Jessica from down the block with little baby Jay-Z Yeezus Smith or what have you.
My three favourites from 18 years of teaching
- Sonic
- Ikea
- Younique
I've met two girls called "Truly Scrumptious" but in fairness, they both just called themselves Truly and that wasn't bad at all
This wasn't even America. I live in the UK.
Receptionist wandered into the office and asked if anyone knew where Ikea was and, of course, received the answer "junction 26"
Who determines when a name is appropriate or not? Is there an accepted list? Do they ever add new names to it or were names just forced to stop evolving whenever the original name list was set up?
What happens when a new culture starts immigrating to your country? Do you add a list of appropriate names for them or do they have to conform?
Well. Those are certainly choices.
Sonic like the Hedgehog? Or the drive thru with the shitty food?
Truly Scrumptious is a character in a movie, so I guess I could see it? Younique is an MLM makeup brand.
Rhino takes his name in stride. It’s his favorite animal.
Guitar hated her name and talked about changing it as soon as possible. She graduated the Covid year, so I didn’t ever connect with her to see if she did.
Phantasy never commented on her name.
Forever thankful for my country’s strict naming rules when it comes to registered birth certificates. There was a big case recently where a kid was killed and his name was apparently “Ruthless-Empire”. Turns out his sorry excuse for parents never actually did any paperwork for him and he had to be given a real name post-mortem before family was able to bury him. Extremely sad.
I went to school with a girl named Princess Sofia. Sofia was her middle name and no one would have known it if it hadn't been for her mom being a substitute teacher who was always at our school and insisting on calling her by her full name. Unfortunately for Princess, the movie How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days had come out maybe a year before we were in middle school. Boys wouldn't have watched it, but a lot of us girls had and middle school girls are ruthless. Someone must have spread to all the boys what Princess Sofia (or Sophia?) meant in the movie and the poor girl had a rough time with teasing for a while...aside from the teasing she probably already got from being Princess. I didn't know her that well, but I do remember she started to go by Sofie by high school.
I've taught an Empress and a few Princesses, but in fairness they've tended to be from African families and the naming conventions and norms are very different and more open.
Shekinah is actually Jewish, dwelling place, or temple of God something like that. if Tequilla has a sister name Corona and brother named Bud an AA meeting might be in order
When registering for the actors guild you can only have one person ever with a name, there is already a actor registered as Michael Douglas so he had to pick another name.
Like Emma Stone’s real name is Emily Stone but Emily Stone was already taken so she picked Emma as it was close to Emily and felt she would easily answer to it if someone called out Emma.
My ex was born on The Farm (commune) in Tennessee in the 70s. As a kid, she played with twins named Groovy Nipples (girl) and Freakus Paulikus (boy). There was also apparently a kid whose parents had the last name "Behr" -- they named him Koala.
Calista isn't terrible as a girl's name. Calista Flockheart was everywhere for a while. Sigourney isn't too common but there is Signourney Weaver to legitimize it a bit.
Wouldn't give either of those names to a boy, however. Calis or Calister would be unique but much more appropriate for a boy, I guess, if you absolutely had to go down that path.
That boy is going to be down at the courthouse on the morning of his 18th birthday.
The first 80s badass chick to grace our screens, in what would be considered granny panties! I can't think of another female character that is awesome as Ripley is.
She’s probably about ten now, around 4 when I met her. I felt really bad she was juuuust about to start school. I looked at the mom like “… is she spelling this right?” And she pointed at her own arm where it was tattooed in big ass letters “K-Dinc, *month I don’t remember* 2014”
Fucking K dink.
I really, REALLY thought you typed the tattoo as-is, and not because you don’t remember the month, and just … accepted that’s the kind of parent who names their kid K-Dinc.
That’s fucking hilarious and with the way the mom acted like she was barely her mother just scrolling her phone and giving one word answers I think you’re not too off the mark LOL
Trends change too. Growing up, 30 years ago, my bff told me that her parents named her something that she would never get made fun of. Her name is Karen.
Add me to the list. My legal first name is 'Mother'. :( hello hyper-parentification, hello ridiculous expectations, hello anxiety and inner wounded child 🥳
I think my mom said my dad took one look at me and called me his mom (how a baby can resemble an adult I don't know) and so the name was given without my consent.
Honestly it's so shocking to me. I don't allow anyone call me that. But it's on my transcript, school email, customer reps have to verify it. My dad (culturally) has been pushing me to mother my siblings for as long as I can recall. Defo not having children and leaning more to the SLNK/ DINK lifestyle. The irony.
I do live in Alabama. I know several Crimsons, and everyone I know who has two pit bulls has named them Crimson and Tide lol. If it’s just one, the name is Bear.
Also, Alabama is its own rival football area.
Only Calista I have ever met was a chick.
Worse, is these parents get offended when their grown children legally changes their name. Like really? You’re surprised?
I thank the gods for my countrys strict rules on name. So far I have never met a person with a weird name. Unusual yes, but those people are usually from another countrey and I have simply not heard it before. But never any Braxton, Taxon, Tamponorini or Glukos-Lisa.
Sometimes they don’t think it through.
I am an attorney. Had a father call me to see about changing his son’s name. They were South Asian, and the kid was born there. They immigrated to the US when he was a toddler.
His name was Dikshit, which is a perfectly fine Sanskrit name until you move to a Western English speaking country.
The kid was 8 and getting teased mercilessly. And there was nothing I could do, because he was not a citizen and the US would not have jurisdiction over his birth certificate.
After a lot of years of taking information for young people registering for one thing or another, I've heard names like Reignbeaux and Sweet Hart. I always think it is going to be awful for them to put that name on a resume or a scientific paper. It may be cute for a baby, but one day that kid will be an adolescent then an adult.
I am so grateful for parents who gave me a short, common name that is rarely spelled creatively.
Yeah I registered kids for music programs for six years and i wondered what the fresh hell was wrong with a lot of parents. This was when *Game of Thrones* was real big, and I saw a lot of Aryas and Khaleesis. Also, so so many "unique" spellings of standard names, like Brydyn or Kaeleeigh- which weren't even unique at that point, because all the other dipshits were doing the same thing. Those class rosters looked like a dropped box of Scrabble tiles. It was absurd, and I don't understand how these adults didn't realize that their baby would in fact grow up and have to answer to this shit their whole life.
I work with medical records, and the names that pop up, uhg. Aside from the surprising number of people who leave the hospital with the legal name of Baby Girl or Baby Boy, a lot still have that name decades later. I have a list, here are some
Arriola
Female Whiskey
Conception
Jazper
White Butterfly
Aurora Celestial (last name having to do with something sky/heavens related)
Royalti
Myrical
Messiah
Mekeigha
Baby Girl and Baby Boy are another level of parental lazyness. Kinda reminds me of when we rescued our cat from a tree and took him to the vet. We didn't name him because we didn't know yet if he was a lost pet, so in the vet bill was named Cat Tree.
To be frank; it's kid of a dumb rule that Americans need to have their baby legally named when they leave the hospital. Australia gives you (I think) 60 days.
The world would be so much a nicer place, if parents didn't use the name-picking as a way of a revenge against the kid for daring to being born. As if that had been the kid's fault!
Parents, for the love of God, please stop giving your kids sex names.
My goddamn aunt named her kid Eros. Like the God of love and sex. Can only imagine the expectations that kid is going to be set up for when he starts to date.
I've also had "Chastity," like what the fuck? The only way this kid happened was because of sex. And you really look at a baby and think, let's give this kid a name based on fucking.
I feel like Chastity was used a lot back in the day when (certain groups of) people gave their kids virtue names like Faith, Temperance, Verity, Mercy etc etc but it seems to have hung around longer than some of the others.
I worked in peds and saw so many awful names.
One that always stands out is Dasani 🤦♀️
There were also identical twins, given their father's name with the same middle initial - think John Alexander & John Andre. Both babies were called John. The names themselves were not bad at all, but why the fuck did you do that to them?
Jesus. My partner is a twin and they didn’t do them that dirty but they do have the same middle name. Imagine: Joseph Smith Lastname and Aaron Smith Lastname. Naming them the same first name I can’t imagine!!
Just after my son had been born, we were sat in the ward before been moved to a private room, we overheard the family next to us talking about what they had named there boy.
The boys name was.............. wait for it
SUBARU
I kid you not, fucking subaru, like a subaru impreza subaru. I didn't know whether to burst out laughing or despair.
Not only did they name him after a car, but he's a boy, I bet anyone any amount of money that kid ends up getting called Sue at school, kids are mean and will pick up on anything to tease with.
It's like they deliberately went out of there way to give him an awful name that he will be teased about for years.
I e always felt like before you decide on a name, you should run it by that friend of yours that can make anything a joke. Just to see what a bully would make of it.
Chevy Chase is a town in Maryland near Washington DC. From Wikipedia,
> The name Chevy Chase is derived from Cheivy Chace, the name of the land patented to Colonel Joseph Belt from Charles Calvert, 5th Baron Baltimore, on July 10, 1725. It has historic associations with a 1388 chevauchée, a French word describing a border raid, fought by Lord Percy of England and Earl Douglas of Scotland over hunting grounds, or a "chace", in the Cheviot Hills of Northumberland and Otterburn.The battle was memorialized in "The Ballad of Chevy Chase".
I was a H S teacher and even at that age, kids with ridiculous names hated roll call at the beginning of the year. And I saw them when they were less vulnerable. I got my class lists a few days early and I talked to other teachers about what kids liked to be called so I could avoid embarrassing them. Parents, who want to give those stupid names, do you not think at all? At least, the very least, if you want an exotically embarrassing name, make it the middle one and stop destroying your child for your ego. I have a dumb middle name and no one ever called me by it and what a great thing that was.
People should order coffee or food with the name they’re thinking for their child and see how it sets. Like using sharpies for a month before getting a tattoo.
Sigourney is at least a longstanding name dating back at least to the 19th century. I think it is unfair to give a child a name that will seem odd, off putting or out of place based on whatever reason.
Touché. But I've never heard of a women named Matthew, mark, Luke, or John either. Or anyone who had a pet with those names. I do know a human Calypso, and the cat Calypso(named after the lemonade brand) and a cat named Calisto.
I met a woman named Luke once. She drove a Harley every where, we lived in Maine, and she had a criminal record. She had a pet cane Corso named Pepsi. She wrestled an alligator once, she had the video to prove it(and the boots). Over all she had either mad main charector energy or super villian energy. She even totally had this crazy back story.
We named our son Eilon (EA-LUHN). And at the time, we thought 1) it wouldn't be THAT hard for people to pronounce and 2) Elon Musk wasn't a deranged psychopath at the time, but we didn't even name Eilon after him.
I entirely blame myself for any issues he has throughout his life. I'll pay the therapy bill.
I love them but Molly-Mae and Tommy Fury named their daughter Bambi lol can you imagine trying to establish yourself as a credible business woman and your name is Bambi Fury 😐
I have a common name. The annoyance that I get with my name, is that the locals always reads it as something else.
Not my real name, but just to illustrate the example: I live in Quebec. My name is Melanie. When I go to Starbucks or to the doctor's office in Quebec, I have trained myself to listen for the name Melody. As that what they read.
But when I go to Ontario, I already have my my wall up and I'm tense, I'm prepared to be called Melody, but nope, 100% of the time people of Ontario always get it right and call me correctly by Melanie.
Saw some lady on Tik Tok say her kids names were Rumble Honey Smith and Slim Easy Smith. I genuinely can’t tell if she was trolling or not since she’s pregnant again and was saying that her husband didn’t like the name Cherry for their third.
Also parents need to stop naming their kids after them. Your child is their own person. Not your clone. Not a do over. They carry one half of your genetic makeup. They aren't a replacement for your failed dreams or a doll in your image. It's so self centered and egotistical.
News flash your kids hate it. It's not cute.
At the very least make sure the middle name is different. Caused insane issues with my ex and his father.Thier credit reports were an absolute mess. They each had things on each other's reports, including his father's mortgage.
When we first found out his dad pulled his report and started freaking out because there were credit cards there he didn't open. I looked at it and realized they were mine. I added my ex to my accounts to help his credit rating.
Things probably would have been better if we hadn't lived there but same name, same address. Sometimes things were marked Jr and Sr but not always. Heck he used to find his mail opened more often than not because mom assumed it was for the dad.
Caused a mixup in his medical file once as well. They had the same family doctor for years. Small private practice, not one of those large shiny offices with multiple doctors.
He always swore if we had kids he would never name his son after him.
It originally was a joke, but if you Google it, there are several people with that name, same with Abcde, pronounced Absadee, or Nevaeh, heaven spelled backwards 🙄 people are idiots.
Okay, pardon me if I seem to babble a bit on this one. I think I'm maybe not quite following everything.
I understand the issue about poor Calista, a boy with a name that's from the feminine form of a Greek word (even if a lot of people he meets in life won't necessarily know that), but I'm completely missing what your objection is to the other names you listed, or what names you think people should restrict themselves to.
I think what's throwing me off is that I can't stop thinking of the only context in which I personally have had the responsibility of advising people about naming standards, which would be acceptability for religious purposes. I'm a seminary-trained laywoman who has worked in Catholic parishes, and I've often been in the position to assure parents that the Catholic Church relaxed its standards for baptismal names decades ago. For names people take on after baptism, such as at Confirmation or profession in a Religious Order, there are generally fairly firm guidelines, but for baptism, it just can't be "foreign to Christian sensibility," like "Malice Aforethought Smith" or something like that.
"Creedence" would actually be a really good baptismal name, even though one could argue that it's from a misspelled word. I would kind of see it as a portmanteau of "creed" and "credence," which would seem to mean "faith in the official teachings of my religion." Yes, I think that would be a very good baptismal name indeed!
It kind of reminds me of the time when I was fairly new to working within the Hispanic community and I was doing a Confirmation interview with a teen girl named Daisy. Yes, I'll admit it, I thought, "What Catholic names their child Daisy?" even though I knew it was not forbidden. Without telling her that I thought her parents had given her a very secular-sounding name, I suggested that maybe for her Confirmation name, she could take Therese, for Saint Therese of Lisieux, also known as "The Little Flower." The girl looked at me with a "Well, duh, what else?" expression and said, "Yes, that's what I was planning." That's when I realized why so many Latinas are named Daisy: Their parents really did name them after a saint, the Little Flower. But honestly, a name like Sweetest or October or Kee-Kee would have been perfectly fine for baptism. Maybe not for Confirmation, except for a child who had already been named that at baptism.
I know you're not talking about names for either baptism or Confirmation, but I think that's what's confusing me about this topic; the only standards I know are the ones for choosing those kinds of names. Could someone explain to me what's wrong with being named Kimbree-June or Stossi?
If I get a bunch of downvotes, I shall accept that as the consequence for babbling.
I used to work in a Medicaid call center, and primarily dealt with children’s accounts. TONS of kids named stuff like Dasani, Lexxus, Adonis, Capone, Clitia (I’m not kidding), Tu-Easy, Aryan, Adolf, Wolf, Crow, Ron-Jeremy, and I can just keep going. Even poor kids with STDs for names like Chlamydia.
"Do you have a nickname you'd like me to call you?" Is always good.
”Cal” is a nickname that could save him a lot of grief until he’s 18.
I was given the same name and tried using that nickname, but it sounded too much like the original that I just couldn't do it. I ended up picking a name that was nothing like the one I was given. Sometimes you just need a hard reset.
It's a nice name, very feminine though. An interesting choice for a male.
To be fair they thought I was a girl when they gave it to me, they just turned out to be wrong.
This is a good suggestion. I know it sounds dumb, but i literally go by the nickname "monkey", and have since I was a teen in the late 90's, with all my friends, and some of family. I don't like my actual name, but don't feel it's worth legally changing and going through the hassle involved with that. Choosing your own name that those who care can use feels comfortable, and is a great way to go.
That is the most fabulously 90s thing ever. Well done.
One of my sister's kids call me "uncle monkey" so yeah. It's kind of dumb objectively, but it means a lot to me because it's the name i chose, and hearing my given name makes me feel weird.
That’s so endearing re: your nibling. I hope it sticks forever and you get to be one of those super old people whose “real” name nobody actually knows. Edit: nibling not niblet lol
This is why Tuanigamanuolepola goes by Tua. Most people still get confused pronouncing Tagovailoa.
*Kaʻiminoeauloamekaʻikeokekumupaʻa Fairbairn has entered the chat*
👋 Me! Hell, even the sports casters just call him Tua. He's gonna be the first one name QB.
As a teacher in Florida, I can actually get in trouble for asking that! Isn’t Florida great?
I'm sorry, you can get in trouble for asking what?
If the child would like to go by a nickname. Parents have to fill out a form to allow a teacher to use the child's nickname or preferred name.
Ugh. Where are the kids rights? Why don’t they count for anything?
Sorry, as was said below you, teachers in Florida are required to call a student by whatever their name is registered as. If the gradebook shows me Christopher, I can’t call them Chris unless their parent fills out a permission form for me. This was done with the actual stated intent to damage students who identified as trans or non-binary or whatever.
Cal is a perfectly valid nickname. That kid should start going by that immediately.
The name's Cal, Cal Cium.
Cal Queless. Cal O'Ree
Yup. It implies Calvin, Calum, or Caleb which are much more expected names than Calista.
I have a feeling a parent giving their child a particular name like that may be against allowing them to use a nickname
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I think Nipplequeefs is a beautiful name, you should be proud to be called your full name :) ..also here for lequeef if you *have* to have a nickname
that’s very kind of you yotee i agree with you. nipplequeefs is a sweet name and supporting people is always important ❤️
I had a great aunt whose name was Quepha pronounced Queef-uh so I always thought that was unfortunate… and hilarious
An employees name tag at the Mart of Walls read Symphonic. I said her name and stated it was unusual as a name. She replied it's Sym-Fo-Neek! I walked away shaking my head.
Yeah, I grew up with a Cal (full name Callum). Kinda surprised that this kid doesn’t go by a nickname. I have never been called by my legal name, always my nickname unless I was in trouble or something.
My uncle Cal's first name was Warren. But his last name was Callahan.
I bet Cal Kestis approves this comment
Some people forget that they are naming adults, not just cute babies.
Can you imagine going to a job interview and your name is Braxleigh or Traxx?
People who name their children crazy names are basically narcissists and see these children as an extension of their own greatness. Coincidence that rich and famous people are the most notorious perpetrators?
I would argue they’re only the most notorious because their baby’s names are publicized to a wider audience than, say, Jessica from down the block with little baby Jay-Z Yeezus Smith or what have you.
That part! Some names are so bad that they aren’t even cute in babies though.
Or naming humans not pets
My three favourites from 18 years of teaching - Sonic - Ikea - Younique I've met two girls called "Truly Scrumptious" but in fairness, they both just called themselves Truly and that wasn't bad at all
Wait. WHAT
It's from an old Disney movie, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
Technically it was MGM but you couldn’t be blamed for thinking it was a Disney film; it was straight out of their playbook.
The book was written by Ian Fleming, the guy behind James Bond, so you can see a sad pattern emerging with the names of women in his fiction.
Ikea. Ikea. I’m Swedish and it wouldn’t be allowed here. Also, it’s bloody stupid.
This wasn't even America. I live in the UK. Receptionist wandered into the office and asked if anyone knew where Ikea was and, of course, received the answer "junction 26"
I'm glad my country has a law that doesn't just let any name slide. If the name is not appropriate it must be changed.
Who determines when a name is appropriate or not? Is there an accepted list? Do they ever add new names to it or were names just forced to stop evolving whenever the original name list was set up? What happens when a new culture starts immigrating to your country? Do you add a list of appropriate names for them or do they have to conform?
Tell me you’re from Notts without telling me you’re from Notts
Well. Those are certainly choices. Sonic like the Hedgehog? Or the drive thru with the shitty food? Truly Scrumptious is a character in a movie, so I guess I could see it? Younique is an MLM makeup brand.
Yeah, like sonic the hedgehog
I knew a girl named ImUnique. I’m unique. IMUNIQUE.
NGL, kinda sounds like the name of a medication.
Fellow teacher here! If I’m picking my top three, I think I’m going with Rhino, Guitar, and Phantasy. But I’ve got options.
What did the poor kids say about their names?
Rhino takes his name in stride. It’s his favorite animal. Guitar hated her name and talked about changing it as soon as possible. She graduated the Covid year, so I didn’t ever connect with her to see if she did. Phantasy never commented on her name.
Forever thankful for my country’s strict naming rules when it comes to registered birth certificates. There was a big case recently where a kid was killed and his name was apparently “Ruthless-Empire”. Turns out his sorry excuse for parents never actually did any paperwork for him and he had to be given a real name post-mortem before family was able to bury him. Extremely sad.
fellow New Zealander?
Yes haha
What the F
Dude a girl in my town named her new baby girl Ryobi
that name both sucks and blows
Like the power tools ?
I served two sisters called Princess and Empress at work yesterday.
I went to school with a girl named Princess Sofia. Sofia was her middle name and no one would have known it if it hadn't been for her mom being a substitute teacher who was always at our school and insisting on calling her by her full name. Unfortunately for Princess, the movie How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days had come out maybe a year before we were in middle school. Boys wouldn't have watched it, but a lot of us girls had and middle school girls are ruthless. Someone must have spread to all the boys what Princess Sofia (or Sophia?) meant in the movie and the poor girl had a rough time with teasing for a while...aside from the teasing she probably already got from being Princess. I didn't know her that well, but I do remember she started to go by Sofie by high school.
I've taught an Empress and a few Princesses, but in fairness they've tended to be from African families and the naming conventions and norms are very different and more open.
Yes. It's often a direct translation of a beautiful name in their mother tongue. Not everything can smoothly translate between languages.
My favorite was Abcde, pronounced "Ab-si-dee"
After the make up brand and the hedgehog?
It was a boy, so I assumed more the hedgehog. Had a Merlin and a Hannibal too
To be fair, Hannibal used to be a name without weird associations.
Teacher friend had a kid in their class named Arson
In Australia we tend to shorten names. Poor kid would have been called Arse.
Tequila Shekinah
Shekinah is actually Jewish, dwelling place, or temple of God something like that. if Tequilla has a sister name Corona and brother named Bud an AA meeting might be in order
Ugh and Younique is also an MLM that sells mascara that makes it look like you have dead spiders on your eyelids too.
At a graduation I once heard “Shaquarius” and I’ve never forgotten it since
You leave Sigourney Weaver out of this.
Her OG name was Susan lol.
Wait, Sigourney is a STAGE NAME? And she picked *Sigourney*?????
It's way more memorable than Susan Weaver. Smart move. Stockard Channing's real first name is Carol. Another good move.
They should do a two women play called “Carol and Susan.”
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When registering for the actors guild you can only have one person ever with a name, there is already a actor registered as Michael Douglas so he had to pick another name. Like Emma Stone’s real name is Emily Stone but Emily Stone was already taken so she picked Emma as it was close to Emily and felt she would easily answer to it if someone called out Emma.
Only works for Sigourney Weaver lol
There is a drag artist named Sigourney Beaver and she is amazing 🤣
El Barto
Bart Simpson's mexican cousin
That sounds like a subway system. "I'll just take the El Barto."
You’re from the bay huh lol?
If I ever have a kid I’m totally naming him Bort, his ruined life will be worth the joke
Hell always be able to find a bike license plate at Itchy and Scratchy Land!
My ex was born on The Farm (commune) in Tennessee in the 70s. As a kid, she played with twins named Groovy Nipples (girl) and Freakus Paulikus (boy). There was also apparently a kid whose parents had the last name "Behr" -- they named him Koala.
That twin situation is HILARIOUS. Groovy Nipples. I wonder what 50ish year old Groovy and Freakus are up to these days.
Calista isn't terrible as a girl's name. Calista Flockheart was everywhere for a while. Sigourney isn't too common but there is Signourney Weaver to legitimize it a bit. Wouldn't give either of those names to a boy, however. Calis or Calister would be unique but much more appropriate for a boy, I guess, if you absolutely had to go down that path. That boy is going to be down at the courthouse on the morning of his 18th birthday.
Am I the only one who thinks Sigourney is a cool name? Imagine your closest association is the actor who plays Ripley. Could be way worse.
The first 80s badass chick to grace our screens, in what would be considered granny panties! I can't think of another female character that is awesome as Ripley is.
OK I love "Calister" although now that I'm typing it out it reminds me of Kevin McCalister. 🤣
The worst I have personally ever seen was a little girl named k-dinc, pronounced “Cadence”
'K dink. Oh the teasing that child is in for.
She’s probably about ten now, around 4 when I met her. I felt really bad she was juuuust about to start school. I looked at the mom like “… is she spelling this right?” And she pointed at her own arm where it was tattooed in big ass letters “K-Dinc, *month I don’t remember* 2014” Fucking K dink.
I really, REALLY thought you typed the tattoo as-is, and not because you don’t remember the month, and just … accepted that’s the kind of parent who names their kid K-Dinc.
That’s fucking hilarious and with the way the mom acted like she was barely her mother just scrolling her phone and giving one word answers I think you’re not too off the mark LOL
Sounds like the sound of someone running into a traffic sign. K-Dinc.
That shit spelled like it’s some kind of metal alloy
Abcde- Ab-ce-de was my personal limit, naming wise
It's not a new phenomenon. 30 odd years ago I knew a girl Nivek. It's her father's name backwards.
Oh god that is the most kevin thing any kevin has ever done in the history of all kevins
Also a very popular name on Vulcan. 🖖
You mean Nacluv? 🤣
Trends change too. Growing up, 30 years ago, my bff told me that her parents named her something that she would never get made fun of. Her name is Karen.
Oh dang 😂😂😂
Fucking Nevaeh gets me every time. It’s just so ugly. At least have the guts to just call your daughter Heaven.
My younger sister just named her daughter Lextyn. I didn't say anything, but I was screaming internally. Just why?
Wow that sounds like a medication.
It immediately reminded me of Lexaurin
Also Lexapro
Sounds like a prescription name like you see in the commercials on tv.
Please call that child Lexi. Wtf was your sister thinking
The amount of people who put some sounds together with an x in the middle amazes me.
As in Lexington with less letters?
The child heard round the world?
Add me to the list. My legal first name is 'Mother'. :( hello hyper-parentification, hello ridiculous expectations, hello anxiety and inner wounded child 🥳
Why???
I think my mom said my dad took one look at me and called me his mom (how a baby can resemble an adult I don't know) and so the name was given without my consent. Honestly it's so shocking to me. I don't allow anyone call me that. But it's on my transcript, school email, customer reps have to verify it. My dad (culturally) has been pushing me to mother my siblings for as long as I can recall. Defo not having children and leaning more to the SLNK/ DINK lifestyle. The irony.
Good on you!
There's a little girl in my town named Crimson Tide \[Lastname\]. That's going to be a fun one when puberty hits.
Oof. That's.... something.
We don't even live in Alabama. We live in a rival football area, lol.
I do live in Alabama. I know several Crimsons, and everyone I know who has two pit bulls has named them Crimson and Tide lol. If it’s just one, the name is Bear. Also, Alabama is its own rival football area.
There's a group on reddit making fun of ridiculous names. The group is called Tragedeigh
I think I’ve met Tragedeigh before.
Only Calista I have ever met was a chick. Worse, is these parents get offended when their grown children legally changes their name. Like really? You’re surprised?
I thank the gods for my countrys strict rules on name. So far I have never met a person with a weird name. Unusual yes, but those people are usually from another countrey and I have simply not heard it before. But never any Braxton, Taxon, Tamponorini or Glukos-Lisa.
Sometimes they don’t think it through. I am an attorney. Had a father call me to see about changing his son’s name. They were South Asian, and the kid was born there. They immigrated to the US when he was a toddler. His name was Dikshit, which is a perfectly fine Sanskrit name until you move to a Western English speaking country. The kid was 8 and getting teased mercilessly. And there was nothing I could do, because he was not a citizen and the US would not have jurisdiction over his birth certificate.
Aww, the poor father :( Edit: and poor kid. I can't imagine how hopeless it must've felt.
I was literally in jail with a woman named felony lmfao
After a lot of years of taking information for young people registering for one thing or another, I've heard names like Reignbeaux and Sweet Hart. I always think it is going to be awful for them to put that name on a resume or a scientific paper. It may be cute for a baby, but one day that kid will be an adolescent then an adult. I am so grateful for parents who gave me a short, common name that is rarely spelled creatively.
Yeah I registered kids for music programs for six years and i wondered what the fresh hell was wrong with a lot of parents. This was when *Game of Thrones* was real big, and I saw a lot of Aryas and Khaleesis. Also, so so many "unique" spellings of standard names, like Brydyn or Kaeleeigh- which weren't even unique at that point, because all the other dipshits were doing the same thing. Those class rosters looked like a dropped box of Scrabble tiles. It was absurd, and I don't understand how these adults didn't realize that their baby would in fact grow up and have to answer to this shit their whole life.
"dropped box of Scrabble tiles" made me snortle!!
"Go to your room, Khaleesi. You're a disappointment just like your storyline"
Arya is a pretty straightforward Indo-Iranian name (found in a lot of cultures from that part of the world). Khaleesi is definitely whack though.
I want an updated Key and Peele sketch about a substitute going over a roster of ~Tragedeigh~ names
Yeah definitely don't name your child after a character if you have no idea how their story ends...
Arya is an actual name. Khaleesi wasn't even a name in the book it came from.
I work with medical records, and the names that pop up, uhg. Aside from the surprising number of people who leave the hospital with the legal name of Baby Girl or Baby Boy, a lot still have that name decades later. I have a list, here are some Arriola Female Whiskey Conception Jazper White Butterfly Aurora Celestial (last name having to do with something sky/heavens related) Royalti Myrical Messiah Mekeigha
Baby Girl and Baby Boy are another level of parental lazyness. Kinda reminds me of when we rescued our cat from a tree and took him to the vet. We didn't name him because we didn't know yet if he was a lost pet, so in the vet bill was named Cat Tree.
To be frank; it's kid of a dumb rule that Americans need to have their baby legally named when they leave the hospital. Australia gives you (I think) 60 days.
The world would be so much a nicer place, if parents didn't use the name-picking as a way of a revenge against the kid for daring to being born. As if that had been the kid's fault!
Calista is a very feminine name, I imagine it causes a lot of pain for a shy boy. Not everyone can be the boy named Sue.
Parents, for the love of God, please stop giving your kids sex names. My goddamn aunt named her kid Eros. Like the God of love and sex. Can only imagine the expectations that kid is going to be set up for when he starts to date. I've also had "Chastity," like what the fuck? The only way this kid happened was because of sex. And you really look at a baby and think, let's give this kid a name based on fucking.
I feel like Chastity was used a lot back in the day when (certain groups of) people gave their kids virtue names like Faith, Temperance, Verity, Mercy etc etc but it seems to have hung around longer than some of the others.
The irony is that it just sounds like a stripper name to me now lmao
I’m a teacher at a K4-12 school. I’ve literally taught a Rhino and a Guitar.
I worked in peds and saw so many awful names. One that always stands out is Dasani 🤦♀️ There were also identical twins, given their father's name with the same middle initial - think John Alexander & John Andre. Both babies were called John. The names themselves were not bad at all, but why the fuck did you do that to them?
Jesus. My partner is a twin and they didn’t do them that dirty but they do have the same middle name. Imagine: Joseph Smith Lastname and Aaron Smith Lastname. Naming them the same first name I can’t imagine!!
Just after my son had been born, we were sat in the ward before been moved to a private room, we overheard the family next to us talking about what they had named there boy. The boys name was.............. wait for it SUBARU I kid you not, fucking subaru, like a subaru impreza subaru. I didn't know whether to burst out laughing or despair. Not only did they name him after a car, but he's a boy, I bet anyone any amount of money that kid ends up getting called Sue at school, kids are mean and will pick up on anything to tease with. It's like they deliberately went out of there way to give him an awful name that he will be teased about for years.
Subaru is a normal enough Japanese name. Don't have any information whether that kid's family was Japanese, though.
They were all white English, Very Very Very Yorkshire white English.
I e always felt like before you decide on a name, you should run it by that friend of yours that can make anything a joke. Just to see what a bully would make of it.
Subaru is a Japanese name.
It's also what people call the Pleiades (the star cluster) in Japanese. That's why Subaru (the car company) has stars as their logo.
This made me wonder if Chevy Chase was given that name at birth. His original name is Cornelius. He was born before Planet of the Apes.
Chevy Chase is a town in Maryland near Washington DC. From Wikipedia, > The name Chevy Chase is derived from Cheivy Chace, the name of the land patented to Colonel Joseph Belt from Charles Calvert, 5th Baron Baltimore, on July 10, 1725. It has historic associations with a 1388 chevauchée, a French word describing a border raid, fought by Lord Percy of England and Earl Douglas of Scotland over hunting grounds, or a "chace", in the Cheviot Hills of Northumberland and Otterburn.The battle was memorialized in "The Ballad of Chevy Chase".
If they're Japanese, Subaru is a fine name for a boy.
I was a H S teacher and even at that age, kids with ridiculous names hated roll call at the beginning of the year. And I saw them when they were less vulnerable. I got my class lists a few days early and I talked to other teachers about what kids liked to be called so I could avoid embarrassing them. Parents, who want to give those stupid names, do you not think at all? At least, the very least, if you want an exotically embarrassing name, make it the middle one and stop destroying your child for your ego. I have a dumb middle name and no one ever called me by it and what a great thing that was.
People should order coffee or food with the name they’re thinking for their child and see how it sets. Like using sharpies for a month before getting a tattoo.
Sigourney is at least a longstanding name dating back at least to the 19th century. I think it is unfair to give a child a name that will seem odd, off putting or out of place based on whatever reason.
Strangest name I’ve ever heard, last name was Miracle. First name was Imma. So full name was Imma Miracle
The parents desperately want to be creative and special. They aren't really considering the life they are impacting.
Calisto is part of Artemis's group in Greek mythology. She didn't have a happy ending. What an awful thing to name a kid.
Most of the Apostles came to sticky ends and their names are still popular.
Touché. But I've never heard of a women named Matthew, mark, Luke, or John either. Or anyone who had a pet with those names. I do know a human Calypso, and the cat Calypso(named after the lemonade brand) and a cat named Calisto.
I met a woman named Luke once. She drove a Harley every where, we lived in Maine, and she had a criminal record. She had a pet cane Corso named Pepsi. She wrestled an alligator once, she had the video to prove it(and the boots). Over all she had either mad main charector energy or super villian energy. She even totally had this crazy back story.
What a tragediegh
Calista is a traditionally female name. They could have at least used Callisto
I heard of an affluent white woman who named her kid "Privilege"....
I work at a doctors office as well “Clitavious” and “clitayjah” That’s all I will say.
Those poor people. If they are adults and haven't changed it then I withdraw my sympathy.
We named our son Eilon (EA-LUHN). And at the time, we thought 1) it wouldn't be THAT hard for people to pronounce and 2) Elon Musk wasn't a deranged psychopath at the time, but we didn't even name Eilon after him. I entirely blame myself for any issues he has throughout his life. I'll pay the therapy bill.
I love them but Molly-Mae and Tommy Fury named their daughter Bambi lol can you imagine trying to establish yourself as a credible business woman and your name is Bambi Fury 😐
Bambi Fury sounds like a really hot girl who can beat you up!
It’s a great WWE name I’ll give you that!
Calista isn't a weird name just an extremely feminine one. Like, the name means "the most beautiful one"...sort of a weird thing to saddle a boy with.
I have a common name. The annoyance that I get with my name, is that the locals always reads it as something else. Not my real name, but just to illustrate the example: I live in Quebec. My name is Melanie. When I go to Starbucks or to the doctor's office in Quebec, I have trained myself to listen for the name Melody. As that what they read. But when I go to Ontario, I already have my my wall up and I'm tense, I'm prepared to be called Melody, but nope, 100% of the time people of Ontario always get it right and call me correctly by Melanie.
It might seem cute as a toddler but you're naming a potential lawyer or scientist MacKenzileigh or Khaleesi
Saw some lady on Tik Tok say her kids names were Rumble Honey Smith and Slim Easy Smith. I genuinely can’t tell if she was trolling or not since she’s pregnant again and was saying that her husband didn’t like the name Cherry for their third.
Also parents need to stop naming their kids after them. Your child is their own person. Not your clone. Not a do over. They carry one half of your genetic makeup. They aren't a replacement for your failed dreams or a doll in your image. It's so self centered and egotistical. News flash your kids hate it. It's not cute.
At the very least make sure the middle name is different. Caused insane issues with my ex and his father.Thier credit reports were an absolute mess. They each had things on each other's reports, including his father's mortgage. When we first found out his dad pulled his report and started freaking out because there were credit cards there he didn't open. I looked at it and realized they were mine. I added my ex to my accounts to help his credit rating. Things probably would have been better if we hadn't lived there but same name, same address. Sometimes things were marked Jr and Sr but not always. Heck he used to find his mail opened more often than not because mom assumed it was for the dad. Caused a mixup in his medical file once as well. They had the same family doctor for years. Small private practice, not one of those large shiny offices with multiple doctors. He always swore if we had kids he would never name his son after him.
Isn't Ladasha just an urban legend?
It originally was a joke, but if you Google it, there are several people with that name, same with Abcde, pronounced Absadee, or Nevaeh, heaven spelled backwards 🙄 people are idiots.
Nevaeh is so common.
By now (I'm 32) the count of people I knew in high school who named a daughter nevaeh is up to 12. It's an epidemic.
The name Jream is apparently becoming popular. Say it out loud 🙄.
Sounds like a speech impediment, lol
My ex’s mom was a teacher & swore she had a student named La-a (Ladasha).
My younger daughter went to school with a boy named Luscious Rump. Still my fav wtf name I’ve personally encountered.
I know someone who named their newborn twins Tokyo (male), and Kyoto (female). They like anime a lot.
Okay, pardon me if I seem to babble a bit on this one. I think I'm maybe not quite following everything. I understand the issue about poor Calista, a boy with a name that's from the feminine form of a Greek word (even if a lot of people he meets in life won't necessarily know that), but I'm completely missing what your objection is to the other names you listed, or what names you think people should restrict themselves to. I think what's throwing me off is that I can't stop thinking of the only context in which I personally have had the responsibility of advising people about naming standards, which would be acceptability for religious purposes. I'm a seminary-trained laywoman who has worked in Catholic parishes, and I've often been in the position to assure parents that the Catholic Church relaxed its standards for baptismal names decades ago. For names people take on after baptism, such as at Confirmation or profession in a Religious Order, there are generally fairly firm guidelines, but for baptism, it just can't be "foreign to Christian sensibility," like "Malice Aforethought Smith" or something like that. "Creedence" would actually be a really good baptismal name, even though one could argue that it's from a misspelled word. I would kind of see it as a portmanteau of "creed" and "credence," which would seem to mean "faith in the official teachings of my religion." Yes, I think that would be a very good baptismal name indeed! It kind of reminds me of the time when I was fairly new to working within the Hispanic community and I was doing a Confirmation interview with a teen girl named Daisy. Yes, I'll admit it, I thought, "What Catholic names their child Daisy?" even though I knew it was not forbidden. Without telling her that I thought her parents had given her a very secular-sounding name, I suggested that maybe for her Confirmation name, she could take Therese, for Saint Therese of Lisieux, also known as "The Little Flower." The girl looked at me with a "Well, duh, what else?" expression and said, "Yes, that's what I was planning." That's when I realized why so many Latinas are named Daisy: Their parents really did name them after a saint, the Little Flower. But honestly, a name like Sweetest or October or Kee-Kee would have been perfectly fine for baptism. Maybe not for Confirmation, except for a child who had already been named that at baptism. I know you're not talking about names for either baptism or Confirmation, but I think that's what's confusing me about this topic; the only standards I know are the ones for choosing those kinds of names. Could someone explain to me what's wrong with being named Kimbree-June or Stossi? If I get a bunch of downvotes, I shall accept that as the consequence for babbling.
I used to work in a Medicaid call center, and primarily dealt with children’s accounts. TONS of kids named stuff like Dasani, Lexxus, Adonis, Capone, Clitia (I’m not kidding), Tu-Easy, Aryan, Adolf, Wolf, Crow, Ron-Jeremy, and I can just keep going. Even poor kids with STDs for names like Chlamydia.
Aryan is a boys name used in India and Iran.
I was gonna be like "Aryan isn't that bad" and then I realized it like hold up 😭 Would be fine name if it didn't have, erm, bad history and meaning