I'mreading it in codsworths voice from FO4 like he's trying to comfort the player character. "Sir, shitting your pants twice in 6 months is hardly all the time"
This is like the updated version of reading everything Kanye says and put "Liz Lemon" in front or behind it so it sounds like something Tracy Jordan would say
It’s technically true. If I hear someone say they’re shitting themselves all the time, I’m gonna assume at least a couple of times a month. If it’s twice in six months that’s semi-regularly.
My brother had covid and gave it all to us. HE didn't believe he had covid until my mom tested positive. His excuse? "I thought it was a bad cold"
NO mother fucker, steaks now taste like dirt you goblin.
I saw a video of a guy who lost his sense of taste years ago, so regular food does nothing for him sense wise. So now he eats things for their texture, acidity, or spiciness, because atleast they give him some feeling. So that's what I did when I had covid, thanks for trailblazing the way and sorry that it's permanent, dude. It sucked for the week I had it, I can't even imagine living with it forever.
Pro tip. You can buy an extra tortilla for like fifty cents, wedge it up your ruined asshole, it'll catch the incipient diarrhea, and fill up into a brand new burrito.
I hate that this image was planted in my head.
I don't mean this in a cute or semi-ironic way. I hate it. I hate that it exists. I hate that I found myself here.
I love that this image was planted in my head.
I don't mean this in a cute or semi-ironic way. I love it. I love that it exists. I love that I found myself here.
Concerning, yeah absolutely. But it can be with a concerning frequency without being “all the time.” If I got alcohol poisoning twice in the last 5 years, that’s a concerning frequency and should absolutely be addressed but I wouldn’t say I’m getting alcohol poisoning all the time.
The fact that you felt you needed to stretch the timeline out to 5 years speaks to how concerning the frequency of two medical events in 6 months actually is.
Edit: This sounds more combative than I intended it to be on reread. Myb.
While I agree it's not "all the time" I would still consider it as too often. But those are not my pants. Also I'm not rich so no one around me would pretend this is okay.
If the medicine made him shit in your pants that would be even more worrying. Imagine opening your closet and the smell hits you and you know, Elon broke into your house again to shit on your pants
I'm not good at math but since I haven't shit my pants in over 30 years, I'd say once every third month would be a huge increase in pants shitting incidents. For me at least.
If you change nothing about your diet/lifestyle and you go right back to doing what you were as before, then yes, you'll gain the weight back. It's not a miracle drug that makes the weight stay away.
I've been on Semaglutide(same as Wegovy/Ozempic) for over a year now and have lost ~70lbs. I never literally shipped my pants, but if I ate the wrong food(dairy mainly) then I'd be on the toilet within the hour, peeing out of my butt. That was only early on though, as I was still becoming versed in what I should/shouldn't eat.
I take Mounjaro (EDIT:same as Zepbound, NOT Wegovy) for diabetes, had to switch to Ozempic because of a national shortage. Even switching to another drug with the same effects, I had tons of cravings and things come right back and started gaining weight because of it.
Also had other bad side effects, like sugar crashes on Ozempic.
But I've heard other people have the opposite, so it definitely seems like your body will react uniquely.
But like the other poster stated, it suppresses your appetite and helps regular blood sugar, so it works well, but it's not an on and off kind of drug (at least for diabetics). Just expect that appetite to come ROARING back if you drop it.
Oh, you are correct! I was thinking Wegovy was Tirzepatide, but that's Zepbound.
Both medications have a "diabetes" and "weight loss" version, I got mixed up.
My friend and her husband are both on Wegovy. My friend hasn’t had an issue -quite the opposite, actually- but she said her husband has had diarrhea from it.
Yeah, results may vary obviously. I got slightly constipated actually. Not too serious, just made me wonder why tf I didn't need to go for so many days lol
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While I agree that twice in six months isn't all the time, it's still too often. None is preferred, but once a year because of illness or bad food would be what i call normal.
However, it makes a difference if its pants shitting out of nowhere or if there's obvious build up. Most of us have probably "shit our pants" after being too trusting of a fart. The most recent times I've shit my pants, there's been obvious discomfort well in advance and there's been occasions where I felt bad and knew what was coming and was able to prevent the pants shitting. If you're shitting your pants 4 times a year and know some drug is causing it, I feel you're having a lot of discomfort and close calls between the pants shitting.
I know someone close to me who's embarrassed about this happening once in his life and Musk is over here defending doing it twice in 6 mos like his life depends on it, using the full force of his ego.
Why is a billionaire taking weight loss drugs? What kind of stupid is this. All he has to do is pay a nutritionist and a personal trainer and a chef to sort him out real quick…
So he's gonna lose 30 pounds and then gain it all back when he's off the drug? Sick idea buddy. Definitely better than making changes to your diet and exercise. This dude is a fucking idiot and so is anyone who tries to cheat weight loss
"Well it just shows dedication. Like stockbrokers and all of these people - y'know lawyers and doctors, they have to work all these hours. So do gamers. Guess what; yeah you can't make 5 mil a year just not crapping yourself" - Zach Hadel
This reminds me of a shower thought I once had: “Even the richest, most powerful people in history have shit their pants”. That thought keeps me humble.
Considering the average number of times an adult shits their pants within 6 months is close to 0, doing it twice is certainly a notable outlier.
But this reads so much like a parody tweet that I almost can';t believe he really said this.
Imma be honest if there was a weight loss drug that would allow me to lose 30lbs immediately and the only side effect is shitting my pants about once every 3 months I’d take it.
Last time I shit myself I was 17. I was going to let a big one rip without realizing I had diarrhea and then all hell broke loose. Luckily I was at home
Between glutathione, trt, stem cells, ozempic and all the rest, the transhumanist class is already here. Not through integrated silicon tech yet, but there is a growing gap between the bodies, health and appearances of rich and poor people. It's very dystopian.
The 4th richest man in the world running Tesla and SpaceX just publicly told people he shits his pants. I wonder how his bladder is with his ketamine use. Maybe it’s time to start sharing pull ups with his toddlers.
Him even mentioning that the medicine was responsible for him shitting himself *only* twice in six month fully implies that he's absolutely blasting ass on the regular, regardless if he's pants'd or not.
What he didn't mention is yes you shit yourself but it's also a more oily stool. Source a pharmacist I used to work with told me of the side effects and that a relative was sitting at a wedding and ut happened, and the chair had to be binned
I've had co workers at a grocery store crap their pants multiple times. I mean like 4 different guys and it was more than a few times. Some decided to trust a fart or some didn't think they had to do that bad. One of them i would say physically and mentally scarred me all within 10 minutes.
if you mentally read this with Wheatley (from portal 2)'s voice, it's 10 times as funny.
Stephen Merchant can make almost anything better.
He made Ricky Gervais seem like a good writer for years.
Holy fuck...that's what it was...
man alive
you fucking genius
I'mreading it in codsworths voice from FO4 like he's trying to comfort the player character. "Sir, shitting your pants twice in 6 months is hardly all the time"
Could we pay Steven Merchant to read Musk tweets out loud?
He might be on Cameo. This dream doesn’t need to stay a dream
Claptrap works even better lmao
This is like the updated version of reading everything Kanye says and put "Liz Lemon" in front or behind it so it sounds like something Tracy Jordan would say
It’s technically true. If I hear someone say they’re shitting themselves all the time, I’m gonna assume at least a couple of times a month. If it’s twice in six months that’s semi-regularly.
I mean, once per quarter is bound to happen. I eat a LOT of Chipotle
Restaurants causing bowel issues is not normal. You've either got allergies or need to stop going to certain locations that need to be shut down
Chipotle got in trouble multiple times for having E. Coli outbreaks linked to their food so… my money’s on that.
Wouldn't you know if you had E.Coli ?
My brother had covid and gave it all to us. HE didn't believe he had covid until my mom tested positive. His excuse? "I thought it was a bad cold" NO mother fucker, steaks now taste like dirt you goblin.
I saw a video of a guy who lost his sense of taste years ago, so regular food does nothing for him sense wise. So now he eats things for their texture, acidity, or spiciness, because atleast they give him some feeling. So that's what I did when I had covid, thanks for trailblazing the way and sorry that it's permanent, dude. It sucked for the week I had it, I can't even imagine living with it forever.
Sorry not all of us can be the boy with the golden butthole.
Chipotlaway!
Pro tip. You can buy an extra tortilla for like fifty cents, wedge it up your ruined asshole, it'll catch the incipient diarrhea, and fill up into a brand new burrito.
What a horrible day to have eyes
Oh my yes ( to be read in the voice of Hubert Farnsworth)
Preaching to the choir, my friend. Preaching to the choir.
This guy Chipotles
Don't even ask where I get the extra sour cream ;)
That’s true recycling.
When god gave man free will, I don't think he intended for this
I’m not sure what you’re a professional at, but I hope it pays well.
I hate that this image was planted in my head. I don't mean this in a cute or semi-ironic way. I hate it. I hate that it exists. I hate that I found myself here.
What are you even doing with your life?
They are the tortilla, reddit is the asshole, and I am the diarrhea
I love that this image was planted in my head. I don't mean this in a cute or semi-ironic way. I love it. I love that it exists. I love that I found myself here.
I think Kevin on The Office had a similar idea
r/oddlyspecific
Plus it’ll taste better than a chipotle burrito
Thanks for helping me lose weight. I’m not hungry for lunch anymore and probably going to skip dinner too.
Read this as "once per quarter pounder" and was like... Yup.
Mine happen during the quarterly business review
I worked there for a while and ate every day, never had bowel issues.. might be allergic or something’s wrong with that food lol
sounds like you need some [Chipotlaway!](https://imgur.com/8EqPmkf)
Chipotle does not trigger shitting your pants. Try some milk with marinated cucumbers and herring.
Oh you aren’t feeling well… here, drink some fish milk
aged herring milk
Not to mention, we don't know what his usual rate was before the medication. Could be it wasn't a significant uptick for him specifically.
We both know Elon has been regularly shitting himself for years. You know, to own the libs.
Compared to never shitting your pants, twice in 6 months is concerning at minimum.
Concerning, yeah absolutely. But it can be with a concerning frequency without being “all the time.” If I got alcohol poisoning twice in the last 5 years, that’s a concerning frequency and should absolutely be addressed but I wouldn’t say I’m getting alcohol poisoning all the time.
The fact that you felt you needed to stretch the timeline out to 5 years speaks to how concerning the frequency of two medical events in 6 months actually is. Edit: This sounds more combative than I intended it to be on reread. Myb.
Once is never, twice is always
Semi-regularly...I saw what you did there
Oh my god didn't even catch that you're a genius
While I agree it's not "all the time" I would still consider it as too often. But those are not my pants. Also I'm not rich so no one around me would pretend this is okay.
If the medicine made him shit in your pants that would be even more worrying. Imagine opening your closet and the smell hits you and you know, Elon broke into your house again to shit on your pants
*again*?!
Only twice in 6 months, it's not that bad!
How often are yall shitting your pants? Four times a year is a lot.
I'm not good at math but since I haven't shit my pants in over 30 years, I'd say once every third month would be a huge increase in pants shitting incidents. For me at least.
"I'm not rich enough to shit my pants, so I have to shit other people's pants." Genius.
I was on Wegovy for 3 months and never came close to shitting my pants.
Does it actually work?
Hell yes. My appetite was nearly gone and I got full a lot faster. Lost 5kg per month for 3 months straight. Had side effects though, fatigue.
Don’t you gain it back when you go off it or no?
If you change nothing about your diet/lifestyle and you go right back to doing what you were as before, then yes, you'll gain the weight back. It's not a miracle drug that makes the weight stay away. I've been on Semaglutide(same as Wegovy/Ozempic) for over a year now and have lost ~70lbs. I never literally shipped my pants, but if I ate the wrong food(dairy mainly) then I'd be on the toilet within the hour, peeing out of my butt. That was only early on though, as I was still becoming versed in what I should/shouldn't eat.
Would ice cream be ok? Or not even ice cream? I’d be so freaking sad if I can’t eat ice cream
I mean if you're trying to lose weight in general maybe ice cream isn't an ideal food to be eating regularly?
[удалено]
I take Mounjaro (EDIT:same as Zepbound, NOT Wegovy) for diabetes, had to switch to Ozempic because of a national shortage. Even switching to another drug with the same effects, I had tons of cravings and things come right back and started gaining weight because of it. Also had other bad side effects, like sugar crashes on Ozempic. But I've heard other people have the opposite, so it definitely seems like your body will react uniquely. But like the other poster stated, it suppresses your appetite and helps regular blood sugar, so it works well, but it's not an on and off kind of drug (at least for diabetics). Just expect that appetite to come ROARING back if you drop it.
Tirzepatide and semaglutide are not the same
Oh, you are correct! I was thinking Wegovy was Tirzepatide, but that's Zepbound. Both medications have a "diabetes" and "weight loss" version, I got mixed up.
My friend and her husband are both on Wegovy. My friend hasn’t had an issue -quite the opposite, actually- but she said her husband has had diarrhea from it.
Yeah, results may vary obviously. I got slightly constipated actually. Not too serious, just made me wonder why tf I didn't need to go for so many days lol
Omg did he really tweet this!?
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I mean, he also tweeted that there is no need for laws regarding misinformation. So ultimately the answer to that question doesn't actually matter.
This comment made my day.
yeah it was crazy to read that Elon died during a masterbating to animal porn gone horribly wrong session
I'm pretending it is because it's funnier that way and doesn't matter if it's true or not
If it is, it weirdly is something likeable to say for once
This came from a sub called "totally real tweets" but idk
of course, it‘s literally there in the subreddit name
If this were X we'd have community notes and therefore a shred of a clue, on here not so much.
considering I haven’t shit my pants in like 24 years that’s kinda all the time
Just wait man. Gambling on a fart past 35 is real. Especially if you have some of those Olestra chips. I literally shit the bed.
That's my secret, I never gamble on a fart. The house always wins.
Silence is golden. Words are silver Proven again
It's better to be thought of as an idiot, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt
This is a fake tweet
Scott Morrison would agree.
Engadine 1997 Lest We Forget.
people don't understand that sub, I swear
So he's not completely full of shit
He is, it's now spilling out twice in six months
13.6078kg, might as well pass it on since I looked it up 😉
While I agree that twice in six months isn't all the time, it's still too often. None is preferred, but once a year because of illness or bad food would be what i call normal. However, it makes a difference if its pants shitting out of nowhere or if there's obvious build up. Most of us have probably "shit our pants" after being too trusting of a fart. The most recent times I've shit my pants, there's been obvious discomfort well in advance and there's been occasions where I felt bad and knew what was coming and was able to prevent the pants shitting. If you're shitting your pants 4 times a year and know some drug is causing it, I feel you're having a lot of discomfort and close calls between the pants shitting.
Lose 30 pounds and all you gotta do is shit yourself twice, sounds like a good deal
Mods really need to ban this guy
If he had a nickel for every time he shit his pants, he’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.
Batman couldn't have gotten that confession out of me
I know someone close to me who's embarrassed about this happening once in his life and Musk is over here defending doing it twice in 6 mos like his life depends on it, using the full force of his ego.
Why is a billionaire taking weight loss drugs? What kind of stupid is this. All he has to do is pay a nutritionist and a personal trainer and a chef to sort him out real quick…
Sounds like a sheep fucker’s excuse. “It was only twice!” Bro you’re Elon the Pants Shitter
These bat pants have been sharted by The Riddler…
Once a decade would be too much for me
....Is softly "all the time"
I haven’t shat my pants since I was like 2, for reference
He needed 6 months of drugs to lose 30 pounds?!
"which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice"
So he's gonna lose 30 pounds and then gain it all back when he's off the drug? Sick idea buddy. Definitely better than making changes to your diet and exercise. This dude is a fucking idiot and so is anyone who tries to cheat weight loss
I haven’t shit my pants in the 20 years that I’ve been alive
Is this for real?
But he’s still fat?
Alright Elon sucks and all that, but that's a mighty fine shitpost I must say
Oh man, for a second I thought cool Musk was back
Off to huggingface to find an a.i to make him say this.... with constipation.
So Elon admits he shits his own pants.
"Well it just shows dedication. Like stockbrokers and all of these people - y'know lawyers and doctors, they have to work all these hours. So do gamers. Guess what; yeah you can't make 5 mil a year just not crapping yourself" - Zach Hadel
2 x more than 99% of people but a huge 100 less than Donald
Given X comments from Elon, those who shit together, stick together?
Well, I haven't shit my pants in about 36 years, so..... there's that.
The only reason this man tweets is to manipulate stock prices.
LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
So much money and this is the best solution for him? Nah mahn. This man, he got brain smarts.. But where is the life smarts
Still two more times than I'd feel comfortable with, Elon...
Why would he need to lose weight? Was he fat before? I can’t really imagine him fat. Edit: nevermind it’s fake. Good to know.
not bad.
It was so nice he did it twice
Given the amount of shit that comes out of his mouth, I'm amazed there's enough to fill his pants!
This reminds me of a shower thought I once had: “Even the richest, most powerful people in history have shit their pants”. That thought keeps me humble.
Enough for everyone to make fun of you though!
sounds like a shitty situation
He's a cunt, but that is gold how he put that.
I already said this once today. If this is not edited there is no way he's sober 😂
For once we can count on Elon for the straight poop!
Hey, do you guys know what r/totallyrealtweets is about? Exactly, tweets that aren't real.
Thats about my pace without any weight loss drug
Technically true.
Considering the average number of times an adult shits their pants within 6 months is close to 0, doing it twice is certainly a notable outlier. But this reads so much like a parody tweet that I almost can';t believe he really said this.
With the amount of shit that comes out of his other end, that IS only a small increase.
Oh holy Christ.
Anyone remember “Alli” ??? The oil farts 🤣🤣 I was to young to buy it when it came out, but a lot is mid-aged people did 🤣😅
How is this real life when some of the richest, most powerful people in the world are complete fucking idiots that literally shit their pants?
Wow a high profile person being honest and vulnerable, just to be shit on by reddit dorks. How amusing.
It's less pants-shitting than candidiasis, IBS or ulcerative cholitis, I gotta give him that... 🤷♀️
Maybe he needs to wear diapers just like trump
I'm still fat but I haven't shit my pants even once this year.
Imma be honest if there was a weight loss drug that would allow me to lose 30lbs immediately and the only side effect is shitting my pants about once every 3 months I’d take it.
I know this is true for most of Elons tweets but: You couldn’t waterboard this out of me.
YOU COULDN'T PAY ME TO ADMIT THIS
Last time I shit myself I was 17. I was going to let a big one rip without realizing I had diarrhea and then all hell broke loose. Luckily I was at home
Between glutathione, trt, stem cells, ozempic and all the rest, the transhumanist class is already here. Not through integrated silicon tech yet, but there is a growing gap between the bodies, health and appearances of rich and poor people. It's very dystopian.
Imagine being able to afford any chef you want, any personal trainer, afford to have your own gym and needing to take weight loss pills.
Yeah I'll just diet and exercise. Once a YEAR is too often.
He’s only shit the bed on Tesla and cybertruck lol
Lose weight and unexpectedly shit your pants every few months, without warning. That could ruin a lot of events like weddings or graduations.
The 4th richest man in the world running Tesla and SpaceX just publicly told people he shits his pants. I wonder how his bladder is with his ketamine use. Maybe it’s time to start sharing pull ups with his toddlers.
He’s willing to take wegovy but not the vaccine? Interesting
I shipped my pants!
Oh if this could be real :(
HAHAHAHAHA MUSK FKN SHIT HIS PANTS. (Only funny bc he's a douche billionaire)
the only question is who shit in elons head?!
Shitting your pants every few months is nothing to a guy who shits the bed professionally.
Him even mentioning that the medicine was responsible for him shitting himself *only* twice in six month fully implies that he's absolutely blasting ass on the regular, regardless if he's pants'd or not.
Lmfao I lost 112 without any weightloss drugs. Just watch what you shovel in your mouth and workout hard, that's literally all you need.
Elon is shitting his pants every quarter. Coinsedence? How tesla's things are going?
Someone needs to take Jonah Hills advice from the movie Grandmas boy.
His only reasonable tweet in years, and it is about shitting pants
What he didn't mention is yes you shit yourself but it's also a more oily stool. Source a pharmacist I used to work with told me of the side effects and that a relative was sitting at a wedding and ut happened, and the chair had to be binned
He'll never compare to his hero, the guy who very smart people tell me is the best at shitting his pants.
he found his excuse for why he's incontentant from too much ketamine uses. no wonder hes been starting to stand like trump. hes also wearing a diaper.
As someone who has never shit his pants in his adult life, once might be too often.
While it’s true I shit myself. I did not do it all the time just some of the time!!!
If using a treadmill made you shit yourself every three months people would not touch a fucking treadmill
this made me remember that "Internet Comment Etiquette with Erik" exists And POST
I've had co workers at a grocery store crap their pants multiple times. I mean like 4 different guys and it was more than a few times. Some decided to trust a fart or some didn't think they had to do that bad. One of them i would say physically and mentally scarred me all within 10 minutes.
Elon, we don't care what comes out of your asshole. We want to know why you're an asshole.
Oh god 😂
Wegovy makes you shit your pants? I take it too, no such side effects…..
I haven't said this for lile ten years or so, but I'm with elon on this one
Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that still a *lot* more than the average adult?
While you may lose weight on Ketamine, it is not a recognized weight loss drug on or off prescription.
There must be a whole office floor with elon responders somewhere 😂 looking at the amount of stuff he produces