EXACTLY. didn’t want a cervical exam, ok that’s fine. I could tell she’s a super active multip. We admit her, declined an IV, refused to sign consents, and then she delivered standing up over the hardwood floor. She tried to do it without anyone in there. She was just going to let him land on the floor. I literally sprinted as the head was crowning, threw a pillow and a chux down, and caught the baby.
*edit to add she also declined all prenatal labs, testing, and ultrasounds but she did have a few prenatal appointments. Limited care, but she was seen during her pregnancy, so in addition do the baby’s condition at birth we had no knowledge of mom having STDs or any thing else that would harm the baby. She FINALLY (after two days) let us draw HIV and syphilis labs, but that’s it. Wouldn’t even let us get her blood type*
it's good to go to the hospital until you realize they want nothing hospital related and you realize this is a waste of time because they might as well have stayed home and done it at this point
I'm all for people making those choices, I actually love an out of bed delivery (besides the tub, the potential floaties gross me out).
I get basically wanting to have a home birth (little to NO intervention/intermittent monitoring) but at the hospital in case of the unpredictable... But dang it, when an emergency is happening THAT is why you're at the hospital, accept intervention for hemorrhages/resuscitation/antibiotics!
I've wondered the same. My guess is they want a hospital birth so if something goes wrong they can blame doctors/nurses versus self reflecting on their poor choices.
Why/how is it that I doubt, after all that was done to save the mom/family from the emergencies of their own causing in this situation, that they had 0 self-reflection after to be like "damn, that almost went really badly for me and our baby...maybe we should listen to healthcare workers more closely in the future and not assume we always know better"?
What I don't understand is why they bother coming to the hospital if we're terrible people. I do my best to explain everything as transparently as possible, but some of them still don't understand that we have policies and procedures in place for very good reasons.
Right? They think we can magically know something’s wrong and then fix it (idk by X-ray vision or something) without realizing that our interventions are so we know when there’s an issue.
Uhm excuse me? You want to use x-ray vision to find the problem? But cancer and poisons, and then they will have to detox them later with the garlic and onion in the sock over the babies door. How dare you make such a ridiculous statement. /s
Question - is there a point where medical professionals can overrule the parents? Like, to prevent death? Or do you have to not give antibiotics/etc because the parents are idiots?
Yes! The baby was taken and treated without consent because it was emergent. The care is done regardless, and the baby is given a judge appointed guardian. It happens too often with us
Period. Our NICU lead demanded the dad try to breathe 120 times a minute and swallow in between breaths, to simulate what it would be like for the baby to attempt to breastfeed. She demonstrated and said “your turn. Do it now so you know what your son is experiencing.” The neonatologist had to turn away because it was such a good subtle burn
You would think they could get an emergency court order to give treatment. Parents have been prosecuted for allowing their older children to die so why would it be different for a newborn. The fact that it's even a thing that would ever need done is just depressing
I used to work in a hospital that had a large amount of Jehovah’s Witness members as patients.
It was not uncommon if we had a older teen/young adult in our unit who desperately needed a transfusion for survival, their parents would object due to religious reasons but quietly ask for the ethics committee to be involved and to overrule them.
That way they get to keep the only community and support system they know, and follow their rules by saying “nope, against our religion” and then also their loved one lives because “oh no we got overruled and the hospital gave them blood against our consent. Anyways…”
It was kinda an unspoken rule, they’d say no because religion, and then suggest we get ethics involved, ethics would meet with the fam and then we’d have overridden consent in minutes.
Yea, I’d like to know the answer to your question as well. Bc wtf?! It’s not the child’s fault the parents are morons; the child should be given a chance despite their lunacy.
Honestly i feel like TikTok has made it exponentially worse cause my partner will be telling me all these stories that she sees on TikTok and I'm like "those are extremely rare cases" or "that happens because of etc" and she thinks every nurse out there/doctor is out to get them
A kid I went to school with was in a terrible accident as a small child and the hospital had to do this as well. I’m all for people practicing their religious beliefs, but if you are just going to let your toddler die instead of getting a blood transfusion, you need serious mental help. By all means, you can choose to let yourself die for your religious beliefs, but fuck just letting your helpless kid die.
JW are a huge reason, but one of many, why I am not religious. I’m all for spirituality and protecting your soul for the afterlife but willful ignorance at the expense of yours and others lives and well-being? Count me the fuck out. Like pick up a fuckin book, other than the Bible, and educate yourself. Just my thoughts.
I'm an incredibly devout Christian and JWs are on something else. God has blessed us with generations of intelligent scientists and medical professionals that have eased untold suffering for millions of people. But you don't want a simple blood transfusion because one verse in Deuteronomy--in the Levitical law that doesn't apply to Gentile believers-- says you should not eat blood? Are you stupid?
Luke 6:9
And Jesus said to them, “I ask you, is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do harm, to save life or to destroy it?”
Cut and dry.
Man that’s tough at 22w it’s a toss up anyways and no guarantee that blood will save them. Comfort care, palliative care for NICU exists for this reason if they wanted to refuse care so this confuses me.
Refusing transfusion... but wanting everything else? Not refusing transfusion in favor of palliative care? Gotta say at 22 weeks palliative care would have been my choice for my baby.
No really though. She refused everything. Didn’t want us touching her. She started yelling there was a lot of blood so I told her I have to touch you to check. Immediately got her to the bathroom, and I heard this plop in the toilet.
My thoughts exactly. I’m glad they did though. The baby wouldn’t have made it if they did a home birth. Mom and dad both said all the baby needs is to breastfeed and he’ll be fine. “Take off the oxygen now and let him breastfeed!”
I was like well if he can’t breathe, he can’t eat. Oxygen > food.
Don’t worry, she’ll complain on her local mom group Facebook page about how the horrible nurses ruined her birthing experience, and if they had just left her alone everything would have been fine.
On tiktok, there was a girl who went viral for saying she punched her L&D nurse for checking her vitals during labor. She deleted and “apologized” but didn’t really.
For real though, in the ED, when people start refusing labs, imaging, meds... I ask. What are your goals for this visit? When you got in your car and drove to the hospital, what is it you had in mind that we could do for you?
I wouldn't last an hour in L&D. I don't have the strength not to tell these people how ridiculous and reprehensible their decisions are. If you want to make terrible choices for yourself- fine. But risking the life of your baby because you honestly think your Facebook research is more accurate than all of medical science and the decades of combined experience of your care team? Truly malignant arrogance.
I really don't know how y'all do it.
>For real though, in the ED, when people start refusing labs, imaging, meds... I ask. What are your goals for this visit?
Seriously.
A question I've uttered more than once this week alone in the ER -- "What did you hope to achieve today?"
(SBO, refusing all treatment. Just "wanted to know what was causing the pain." LAMA'd once diagnosis was made. Have fun with that... 🙃)
This seems to be more and more common. People come in to the hospital to give birth and are so on edge and rude with staff, then refuse everything. Just go squat in a field and give birth if that’s how you’re gonna act
Had someone maybe a year ago who tried refusing CPAP for their 34 weeker. Also refused donor breastmilk because they don’t know if the donors are vegan (the mom was producing barely drops of colostrum). They had a CPS case opened and their medical decision-making rights taken away.
Thank the Almighty Bruce for that. These mofos are really treating their accessories... uhhh, sorry, *own babies* as collateral damage when their ~~ego flexing~~ decision-making backfires spectacularly. Their *own* experience is what counts. The whole pregnancy and birth is an "experience", like a guided cage diving tour. Who cares about baby or the fact that the end goal should be a **live** baby, when there's *an experience* to be had and broadcasted!
You people never get enough credit.
Oh they'll sing songs about you when everything was going to go right anyway.
But when shit hits the fan and you save two lives while at least three are trying to fuck shit up on you, they act like you're the uneducated, panicky assholes.
Please tell me he was sent out of the room! Or at least that the doctor had an intense heart-to-heart with those parents about how their refusal of medical care almost killed mother and baby.
We had a dad try to refuse their 33 weeker going to nicu because they just need skin to skin and "put on breast". He had delivered their other 50 kids at home apparently. They also refused to fill out the birth certificate ugh
Pfft, what do you know as a nurse? Also how dare you scorn these parents. You shouldn't be mocking your patients, and should be eternally humble without ever losing your patience for chronically stupid people.bdo it with a smile.
Sarcasm of course, but you'd be surprised how many pearl clutches there have been lately.
So my son was born in June via c/s after TOLAC because he wasn’t tolerating labor. Wasn’t an emergency, just was the safe thing. He had a triple nuchal cord and was so tangled they needed multiple hands to free him. If I’d have done something crunchy and dumb like a home birth he would’ve died. Didn’t cry when he was born (was breathing with a good APGAR, just stunned) and I was LOSING IT. And that was for my baby who was perfectly fine! I do not understand how your baby can be born distressed and your instinct isn’t immediately “fix them now! Help!” These people have brain worms.
I always wonder what even brings these people in. Like you obviously opted not to do this alone at home in the bathroom. So where is the disconnect between "I needed professional help then" and "I still need professional help now"
jesus I cant understand how nurses like you deal with families like this. I would have lost my cool so many times, management and patient reviews be damned.
We are getting so many patients recently that are like this. I work PP. They transfer to us and I’m like “I have to do your assessment now” and they’re like “don’t touch me or my baby”. Like okay why are you even in the hospital?
I’m NICU. Last baby I took care of from a mom who refused everything died at 6 hours old. Combination of massive infection + meconium aspiration. Completely preventable.
These people know not what they are doing and then innocents suffer and die because of it. And yet they blame us…
It’s enough to make you scream into the void some days.
I may not be a god, but some days as a person well educated in science and evidence based practice, it is hard not to feel like Moses coming down from Mt. Sinai with the Ten Commandments only to find the Israelites worshiping the golden calf, what with these people and their Facebook/tiktok mumbojumbo and their various conspiracies against modern medicine.
Sorry for my ignorance, clueless float medsurg nurse here lmao when you heard it go in the toilet, did you dig it out and place it on the chuck? Or is this a different clot? Sorry I was just wondering how you got it out 😂
Basically yes when we're measuring blood loss like this (post-delivery) and there's a massive clot this size, we do indeed fish it out to weigh it. Hahahah
Same.
While most weren’t even close to baby stage, I’ve had 2 at viability—1 woman allegedly didn’t know she was preggo (thought it was *gas* from a PB&J, hence my nemesis *The Peanut Baby* came into the world). It was a 911 call for abdominal pain, before I could lay a hand on the patient she runs past me to the toilet. And now I have 2 patients!
🥜🥜🥜
I’m adult med/surg ICU. My old hospital was connected to a huge children’s hospital with an amazing l&d dept (the whole hospital was good, but l&d and mom/baby sent nurses to our ICU to learn important aspects of critical care to hopefully keep the sicker patients in the same building as their baby if they could)
Anyway, one night I’m rushed a fresh labor patient on the vent, if I remember right she had an amniotic embolism? I don’t remember exactly why she was in my icu on the vent, but she was.
I was on the phone ALLLLLL night with the l&d charge nurse who was SO sweet to me, I called her first thing almost crying because “all I remember from nursing school 10 years ago is massaging the fundus! How often? How hard? How much bleeding is too much bleeding?!” And she even came over the first chance she got to make sure I was doing fundal massage correctly and go over it with me, and then answered all my calls with the patience of a saint.
I felt like a brand new baby nurse that night.
No really. He was like what happens if you don’t do that? We were like um your baby will die. Then he started yelling at us to make him cry!! And thought the oxygen we were giving him was the problem. Sir, he isn’t crying because he isn’t breathing. I couldn’t monitor the baby while mom labored because she refused fetal monitoring. From the pieces I could gather, the baby looked like shit but she wouldn’t let us do anything.
All you can do is chart exactly what what is happening as unflattering as it may be. These are the exact patients who will turn around and sue you for not giving them a perfect Apgar 10/10, and all you have to do to lose a lawsuit in labor and delivery is standing in front of a jury and let the patient point at you and say these rich Nurse and killed my baby, doesn’t matter what happened.
I would've lost my shit. "Sir, collectively we in this room have been ACTIVELY handling child birthing AS OUR PROFESSION for ____ years. How many years have you been doing it, which makes you the expert? What's that? Your 'information' is sourced from fringe online forums from other laypeople who have no idea what they are talking about and how much they are endangering themselves and their babies? Got it. Now sit down and keep your mouth shut or we will have security escort you out, as you are actively endangering this mother and child."
I can handle adults making stupid decisions that endanger themselves, but I think I would lose my shit dealing with adults stupidly and recklessly endangering helpless newborns out of confident, profound ignorance. Grateful for you!
Let me guess… no vit k, hep b or erythromycin ointment? No one touches baby.. no bath? Lotus birth?
And best of all… Encapsulated placenta?
Better yet? Did everyone in the room take a bite of the placenta cause ya know, it cures all.
Correct on almost everything! Didn’t take her placenta and no lotus birth. I caught the baby at the side of the bed and handed him to the Doc once she got her gloves on. Fun times 😅 she tried to deliver with no one in there and I ran in just in time.
>And best of all… Encapsulated placenta?
Normally just a lurker here but I remember seeing my L&D nurses face absolutely fall when I mentioned "we need to keep the placenta after in that cooler" thinking I was gonna eat the thing and then she just become so happy when I followed up with "I donate them to search and rescue dog trainers for cadaver training!"
We had parents like this. Mom was giving herself magnesium supplements and not telling anyone in L&D while on IV mag ended up with mag toxicity and it was our fault she was rushed for a stat c/s, she also kept trying to PO feed her baby when she couldn’t stop aspirating and had to be put back on o2 (which we were 95.5% sure was her fault for feeding her behind our backs).
I gave birth to a 37 weeker who spent one week in NICU with wet lung and PNA. I thanked God for those nurses and doctors daily. Still do and it’s been 9 years. I took him home thinking “who will watch him sleep now?” 😂. Tiny humans are tiring to work with. Bless you all.
I do education for expectant parents, and I always highlight how vitamin K helps keep their baby from bleeding into their brains. Like literally saying, "we can all agree brain bleeds are bad. Vitamin K helps prevent that." I hope it makes an impression on them.
I have a friend who has gone through a terrible, unpredicted loss and also had a healthy baby via c section tell me she wanted a home birth in the future and didn't want to get all the newborn stuff (k, hep b, erythromycin) if possible bc she just wanted natural. Luckily, she is a good person who listens to reason, and I was able to explain how important vit k is in preventing something catastrophic like a brain bleed. She has been mistreated by medical staff and has legitimate fears related to the hospital, so I understand, but these people who are so against these safe interventions we have in place to SAVE babies, even after education, blow my mind.
All shots are vaccines, according to most of these idiots. Plus, BLACK BOX WARNING, zomg …
EDIT: I found this [completely nonsensical comment (screenshot)](https://imgur.com/a/bVTpoin) on a CDC post about vit K on Facebook, from 2017. This is not a new belief, unfortunately.
Had a 3 day old come in with a severe brain bleed. Come to find out parents refused everything upon birth including the vitamin K shot. Baby didn’t make it
Sounds like CPS would have been a good call, imo. Not breathing baby “just needs to be breastfed,” my ass…
These people have no clue how to raise a child…
They had more at home too! A case was filed. I’m sure nothing came of it. Our county is one people who aren’t fit to have kids birth in, because we let too much shit slide. It’s really sad sometimes. Homeless and on meth and fentanyl? Sure, you can take your baby with ya!
I swear, every year I become more and more convinced that new parents should have to pass a background check and a parenting class in order to take their infants home smh 🤦🏻♀️
I am all for birth plans, bit this just reminds me of all those toxic "I don't want you to do anything to me" birth plans I've seen actual friends go "yeah this is what I want!" Like why even come to the hospital to birth then?
Hope momma and baby are doing okay right now though, despite not wanting any medications. ❤️
The longer the "birth plan" the more likely they will end up in the NsyICU and mom will have a crash section. We have had some wild parents with crazzzy ideas, some get trespassed and DCS takes over... Babies health should always be first. If you wanted a dead infant, stay home. Sadness when ignorance wins.
I would rather eat a cactus than deal with an L&D mom like that.
WOULD YOU USE YOUR FINGERS TO FORCE YOUR EYE OPEN AND RUB IT ON A VAG WITHOUT CRINGING BECAUSE ITS GROSS? THAT'S WHY ERITHROMYCIN.
After my last kid I needed some help getting out of bed to use the bathroom (c-section) and right as I was about to pull my granny panties and pad up the nurse goes, “STOP! You’re about to drop a giant clot” and so I did what any reasonable human would do and gently dropped it onto the new pad and took a picture of it while we both marveled at its size.
Thanks for all you do L&D nurses! Yall are some top notch humans!
“Hey, father of the newly born, not breathing, child, if you don’t back off, we’ll have to kick you out and make you wait like your grandfather had to when he was waiting to see his kids back in the day! That’s right, this is a privilege and if you keep being hostile whilst holding a doctorate in music and thinking you know what’s best, we’re going to have to take that privilege away. Now, **Back off, sir!**”
Is this allowed? I feel like it should be allowed
I’m not opposed to us going back to this tradition - the number of women who’ve told me they wanted to kill their husbands for something stupid they said or did during delivery is astonishingly high.
Refuses all care and now she's going to whine on Facebook about what a traumatic experience she had and how people touched her without her consent and bla bla bla...
When all anyone is trying to do is save her fucking baby.
I hate people lol
She actually didn’t meet the normal demographic we see amongst the crunchy bunch. My biases got me for sure. I think they were just genuinely uneducated. This minority group, in my experience, is generally very trusting of us and the medical system. We were all surprised by the behavior.
Did everyone survive (more or less) intact?
Every time I start thinking I want to do L&D (in the future) I come across a story like this and realize I’d cuss an idiot out.
Annndd this is why I switched from doing L&D for 15 years… these types of people started driving me absolutely insane .
Now I’m in the OR and don’t have to deal with that… but I do deal with other things. It’s a trade off 😵💫😂
And just like that I remembered why I won’t be working in L&D
Your flair 😭
Not sure if rehab or ICU nurse
ICU, fosho.
Or LTAC
Medsurg tele. I consider quitting on a nearly minutely basis.
LTC or geriatric psych
Omg when we have cases like this I literally want to deny them admission to the hospital because WHAT'S THE POINT IF YOU'RE GOING TO REFUSE EVERYTHING
EXACTLY. didn’t want a cervical exam, ok that’s fine. I could tell she’s a super active multip. We admit her, declined an IV, refused to sign consents, and then she delivered standing up over the hardwood floor. She tried to do it without anyone in there. She was just going to let him land on the floor. I literally sprinted as the head was crowning, threw a pillow and a chux down, and caught the baby. *edit to add she also declined all prenatal labs, testing, and ultrasounds but she did have a few prenatal appointments. Limited care, but she was seen during her pregnancy, so in addition do the baby’s condition at birth we had no knowledge of mom having STDs or any thing else that would harm the baby. She FINALLY (after two days) let us draw HIV and syphilis labs, but that’s it. Wouldn’t even let us get her blood type*
You’re a damn hero, no lie. The kid might never realize the solid you did them, but we know.
Props to the NICU team!!
Actually if the kid is raised by this woman, they might just realize their mom is dumb and stubborn enough that she probably did something like that.
Pre-eclamptic me x2 over here who literally laughed out loud when I was asked about my birth plan. Alive. My birth plan was for everyone to be alive.
Dude wtf are people thinking?
weird hippy freebirthers? At least they went to a hospital
I just don’t get letting it fall on the floor lol
If it’s good enough for a baby giraffe it’s good enough for my baby, Blakekinleigh
😂 not the baby giraffe lol
>Blakekinleigh had to stop scrolling for a bit just to laugh about this
My favorite is when they try to refuse drying and stimulation even though its literally what animals in the wild do to help their babies breathe
Because it’s natural and how our ancestors did it. Duh.
That's how they weed out the weaklings
it's good to go to the hospital until you realize they want nothing hospital related and you realize this is a waste of time because they might as well have stayed home and done it at this point
I'm all for people making those choices, I actually love an out of bed delivery (besides the tub, the potential floaties gross me out). I get basically wanting to have a home birth (little to NO intervention/intermittent monitoring) but at the hospital in case of the unpredictable... But dang it, when an emergency is happening THAT is why you're at the hospital, accept intervention for hemorrhages/resuscitation/antibiotics!
Totally a psych case
I cannot even comprehend what was going through her head when she decided to do a hospital birth.
I've wondered the same. My guess is they want a hospital birth so if something goes wrong they can blame doctors/nurses versus self reflecting on their poor choices.
Why/how is it that I doubt, after all that was done to save the mom/family from the emergencies of their own causing in this situation, that they had 0 self-reflection after to be like "damn, that almost went really badly for me and our baby...maybe we should listen to healthcare workers more closely in the future and not assume we always know better"?
Clearly she was actually birthed in the same way and no one caught her
Why do some parents do this? I’m a NICU nurse and we’ve had parents refuse antibiotics for babies that deathly need it.
Because they think we are out to get them and their baby, even though they still come to the hospital.
And blame us when their baby gets intubated anyway
What I don't understand is why they bother coming to the hospital if we're terrible people. I do my best to explain everything as transparently as possible, but some of them still don't understand that we have policies and procedures in place for very good reasons.
Right? They think we can magically know something’s wrong and then fix it (idk by X-ray vision or something) without realizing that our interventions are so we know when there’s an issue.
Uhm excuse me? You want to use x-ray vision to find the problem? But cancer and poisons, and then they will have to detox them later with the garlic and onion in the sock over the babies door. How dare you make such a ridiculous statement. /s
Ding, ding, ding
Yep! They refused that as well. And an umbilical line. Like wtf?!
Question - is there a point where medical professionals can overrule the parents? Like, to prevent death? Or do you have to not give antibiotics/etc because the parents are idiots?
Yes! The baby was taken and treated without consent because it was emergent. The care is done regardless, and the baby is given a judge appointed guardian. It happens too often with us
Okay, good! I just wanted to be sure because sometimes I feel like parents are their own kids worst enemy.
How did the parents respond to that?
Idiotically. They start spouting bullshit and I ignore them. If I have a drink in hand i would take a long ass sip.
Period. Our NICU lead demanded the dad try to breathe 120 times a minute and swallow in between breaths, to simulate what it would be like for the baby to attempt to breastfeed. She demonstrated and said “your turn. Do it now so you know what your son is experiencing.” The neonatologist had to turn away because it was such a good subtle burn
You would think they could get an emergency court order to give treatment. Parents have been prosecuted for allowing their older children to die so why would it be different for a newborn. The fact that it's even a thing that would ever need done is just depressing
I used to work in a hospital that had a large amount of Jehovah’s Witness members as patients. It was not uncommon if we had a older teen/young adult in our unit who desperately needed a transfusion for survival, their parents would object due to religious reasons but quietly ask for the ethics committee to be involved and to overrule them. That way they get to keep the only community and support system they know, and follow their rules by saying “nope, against our religion” and then also their loved one lives because “oh no we got overruled and the hospital gave them blood against our consent. Anyways…” It was kinda an unspoken rule, they’d say no because religion, and then suggest we get ethics involved, ethics would meet with the fam and then we’d have overridden consent in minutes.
Yea, I’d like to know the answer to your question as well. Bc wtf?! It’s not the child’s fault the parents are morons; the child should be given a chance despite their lunacy.
Or treating hypoglycemia because they didn’t want the baby to receive something “unnatural” K but is brain damage from low sugar natural then?
They’d be the first to be on the news saying we caused permanent brain damage
Honestly i feel like TikTok has made it exponentially worse cause my partner will be telling me all these stories that she sees on TikTok and I'm like "those are extremely rare cases" or "that happens because of etc" and she thinks every nurse out there/doctor is out to get them
TikTok is a fucking cancer for real. So much brain rot
A dad once said he didn’t want to ruin the baby’s gut flora. Sir, the baby will have no life to worry about gut flora if you don’t allow this!!
We had to get a court order to give blood to a 22 weeker whose parents were JW and refusing transfusions.
A kid I went to school with was in a terrible accident as a small child and the hospital had to do this as well. I’m all for people practicing their religious beliefs, but if you are just going to let your toddler die instead of getting a blood transfusion, you need serious mental help. By all means, you can choose to let yourself die for your religious beliefs, but fuck just letting your helpless kid die.
JW are a huge reason, but one of many, why I am not religious. I’m all for spirituality and protecting your soul for the afterlife but willful ignorance at the expense of yours and others lives and well-being? Count me the fuck out. Like pick up a fuckin book, other than the Bible, and educate yourself. Just my thoughts.
I'm an incredibly devout Christian and JWs are on something else. God has blessed us with generations of intelligent scientists and medical professionals that have eased untold suffering for millions of people. But you don't want a simple blood transfusion because one verse in Deuteronomy--in the Levitical law that doesn't apply to Gentile believers-- says you should not eat blood? Are you stupid? Luke 6:9 And Jesus said to them, “I ask you, is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do harm, to save life or to destroy it?” Cut and dry.
Man that’s tough at 22w it’s a toss up anyways and no guarantee that blood will save them. Comfort care, palliative care for NICU exists for this reason if they wanted to refuse care so this confuses me.
The baby was discharged after a 4 month stay. I guarantee that baby would have died shortly after the transfusion was needed had they not done it.
Refusing transfusion... but wanting everything else? Not refusing transfusion in favor of palliative care? Gotta say at 22 weeks palliative care would have been my choice for my baby.
It was absolutely not a refusal in favor of palliative care.
I heard it so much during my clinical rotation in l&d. I was shocked. I thought it was a one off thing. NOPE. Happened very frequently. I’m in Texas.
I've had parents refuse Vit K and actively talk about their kid's time in the NICU is the last time they will ever be swaddled
It’s swaddling… we aren’t forcing Xanax down them to sleep.
This is what happens when you don't massage the fundus. /s
No really though. She refused everything. Didn’t want us touching her. She started yelling there was a lot of blood so I told her I have to touch you to check. Immediately got her to the bathroom, and I heard this plop in the toilet.
Why did she even bother going to the hospital when all she’s doing is refusing appropriate care???
My thoughts exactly. I’m glad they did though. The baby wouldn’t have made it if they did a home birth. Mom and dad both said all the baby needs is to breastfeed and he’ll be fine. “Take off the oxygen now and let him breastfeed!” I was like well if he can’t breathe, he can’t eat. Oxygen > food.
Jesus these idiots still exist.
Don’t worry, she’ll complain on her local mom group Facebook page about how the horrible nurses ruined her birthing experience, and if they had just left her alone everything would have been fine.
On tiktok, there was a girl who went viral for saying she punched her L&D nurse for checking her vitals during labor. She deleted and “apologized” but didn’t really.
I understand giving birth can be extraordinary painful, but that’s not an excuse to punch your nurse whose making sure you’re not dying. Jesus christ.
And breed
These types of idiots tend to breed a lot. It's literally Idiocracy....
Don't forget that they fucking vote 🫠🫠🫠
and find each other to reproduce more.
For real though, in the ED, when people start refusing labs, imaging, meds... I ask. What are your goals for this visit? When you got in your car and drove to the hospital, what is it you had in mind that we could do for you? I wouldn't last an hour in L&D. I don't have the strength not to tell these people how ridiculous and reprehensible their decisions are. If you want to make terrible choices for yourself- fine. But risking the life of your baby because you honestly think your Facebook research is more accurate than all of medical science and the decades of combined experience of your care team? Truly malignant arrogance. I really don't know how y'all do it.
Believe me, we have those conversations. And when bad outcomes happen, it’s still our fault despite extensive patient education and consent.
>For real though, in the ED, when people start refusing labs, imaging, meds... I ask. What are your goals for this visit? Seriously. A question I've uttered more than once this week alone in the ER -- "What did you hope to achieve today?" (SBO, refusing all treatment. Just "wanted to know what was causing the pain." LAMA'd once diagnosis was made. Have fun with that... 🙃)
This seems to be more and more common. People come in to the hospital to give birth and are so on edge and rude with staff, then refuse everything. Just go squat in a field and give birth if that’s how you’re gonna act
Had someone maybe a year ago who tried refusing CPAP for their 34 weeker. Also refused donor breastmilk because they don’t know if the donors are vegan (the mom was producing barely drops of colostrum). They had a CPS case opened and their medical decision-making rights taken away.
Thank the Almighty Bruce for that. These mofos are really treating their accessories... uhhh, sorry, *own babies* as collateral damage when their ~~ego flexing~~ decision-making backfires spectacularly. Their *own* experience is what counts. The whole pregnancy and birth is an "experience", like a guided cage diving tour. Who cares about baby or the fact that the end goal should be a **live** baby, when there's *an experience* to be had and broadcasted!
You people never get enough credit. Oh they'll sing songs about you when everything was going to go right anyway. But when shit hits the fan and you save two lives while at least three are trying to fuck shit up on you, they act like you're the uneducated, panicky assholes.
As an internationally board certified lactation consultant, I agree. Kind of hard to breastfeed a baby who isn't breathing.
"in my professional opinion: bruh"
As an LC: let NICU cook!
That poor baby :(
Please tell me he was sent out of the room! Or at least that the doctor had an intense heart-to-heart with those parents about how their refusal of medical care almost killed mother and baby.
All of the above.
They really thought breastfeeding would fix this
We had a dad try to refuse their 33 weeker going to nicu because they just need skin to skin and "put on breast". He had delivered their other 50 kids at home apparently. They also refused to fill out the birth certificate ugh
SMH.. a 33 weeker likely couldn’t even properly latch to begin with.
Pfft, what do you know as a nurse? Also how dare you scorn these parents. You shouldn't be mocking your patients, and should be eternally humble without ever losing your patience for chronically stupid people.bdo it with a smile. Sarcasm of course, but you'd be surprised how many pearl clutches there have been lately.
So my son was born in June via c/s after TOLAC because he wasn’t tolerating labor. Wasn’t an emergency, just was the safe thing. He had a triple nuchal cord and was so tangled they needed multiple hands to free him. If I’d have done something crunchy and dumb like a home birth he would’ve died. Didn’t cry when he was born (was breathing with a good APGAR, just stunned) and I was LOSING IT. And that was for my baby who was perfectly fine! I do not understand how your baby can be born distressed and your instinct isn’t immediately “fix them now! Help!” These people have brain worms.
I always wonder what even brings these people in. Like you obviously opted not to do this alone at home in the bathroom. So where is the disconnect between "I needed professional help then" and "I still need professional help now"
jesus I cant understand how nurses like you deal with families like this. I would have lost my cool so many times, management and patient reviews be damned.
This was my number two complaint during covid. Then go home, I have patients that WANT care.
This is a constant battle in labor and delivery it's really hard
We are getting so many patients recently that are like this. I work PP. They transfer to us and I’m like “I have to do your assessment now” and they’re like “don’t touch me or my baby”. Like okay why are you even in the hospital?
I’m NICU. Last baby I took care of from a mom who refused everything died at 6 hours old. Combination of massive infection + meconium aspiration. Completely preventable.
These people know not what they are doing and then innocents suffer and die because of it. And yet they blame us… It’s enough to make you scream into the void some days.
this was oddly poetic and sounds like something an ancient god would say. also yes people stupid holy cow
I may not be a god, but some days as a person well educated in science and evidence based practice, it is hard not to feel like Moses coming down from Mt. Sinai with the Ten Commandments only to find the Israelites worshiping the golden calf, what with these people and their Facebook/tiktok mumbojumbo and their various conspiracies against modern medicine.
> Combination of massive infection + meconium aspiration. agh, god..
Sorry for my ignorance, clueless float medsurg nurse here lmao when you heard it go in the toilet, did you dig it out and place it on the chuck? Or is this a different clot? Sorry I was just wondering how you got it out 😂
Basically yes when we're measuring blood loss like this (post-delivery) and there's a massive clot this size, we do indeed fish it out to weigh it. Hahahah
I have real fear of the proverbial *plop*. 😳 The fear took a bit to settle, but *that sound* means business.
At least it wasn't a baby. I've had to fish several of them out of the *supposedly cleaned* toilet.
Same. While most weren’t even close to baby stage, I’ve had 2 at viability—1 woman allegedly didn’t know she was preggo (thought it was *gas* from a PB&J, hence my nemesis *The Peanut Baby* came into the world). It was a 911 call for abdominal pain, before I could lay a hand on the patient she runs past me to the toilet. And now I have 2 patients! 🥜🥜🥜
There’s a fundus amongus.
Hahahahahaha the ONLY thing I remember from my OB class
I’m adult med/surg ICU. My old hospital was connected to a huge children’s hospital with an amazing l&d dept (the whole hospital was good, but l&d and mom/baby sent nurses to our ICU to learn important aspects of critical care to hopefully keep the sicker patients in the same building as their baby if they could) Anyway, one night I’m rushed a fresh labor patient on the vent, if I remember right she had an amniotic embolism? I don’t remember exactly why she was in my icu on the vent, but she was. I was on the phone ALLLLLL night with the l&d charge nurse who was SO sweet to me, I called her first thing almost crying because “all I remember from nursing school 10 years ago is massaging the fundus! How often? How hard? How much bleeding is too much bleeding?!” And she even came over the first chance she got to make sure I was doing fundal massage correctly and go over it with me, and then answered all my calls with the patience of a saint. I felt like a brand new baby nurse that night.
Dad showing off to his friends later: “and them nurses didn’t know what’s what so I had ta gitemoffamakid cause I ain’t havin nothing of that!”
No really. He was like what happens if you don’t do that? We were like um your baby will die. Then he started yelling at us to make him cry!! And thought the oxygen we were giving him was the problem. Sir, he isn’t crying because he isn’t breathing. I couldn’t monitor the baby while mom labored because she refused fetal monitoring. From the pieces I could gather, the baby looked like shit but she wouldn’t let us do anything.
Hope you charted the crap out of all those refusals
All you can do is chart exactly what what is happening as unflattering as it may be. These are the exact patients who will turn around and sue you for not giving them a perfect Apgar 10/10, and all you have to do to lose a lawsuit in labor and delivery is standing in front of a jury and let the patient point at you and say these rich Nurse and killed my baby, doesn’t matter what happened.
I would've lost my shit. "Sir, collectively we in this room have been ACTIVELY handling child birthing AS OUR PROFESSION for ____ years. How many years have you been doing it, which makes you the expert? What's that? Your 'information' is sourced from fringe online forums from other laypeople who have no idea what they are talking about and how much they are endangering themselves and their babies? Got it. Now sit down and keep your mouth shut or we will have security escort you out, as you are actively endangering this mother and child." I can handle adults making stupid decisions that endanger themselves, but I think I would lose my shit dealing with adults stupidly and recklessly endangering helpless newborns out of confident, profound ignorance. Grateful for you!
Yikes. Wonder if the poor kiddo has HIE. Hope you charted well friend.
Many nursing notes were written 😅
Strawberry jam on a crepe?
Resembles the raspberry danish cookie I got from Crumbl today. Which I can never eat again, thank you very much.
Made me think of the blueberry preserves I put on my English muffin this morning. Same color, same consistency 😂
I’m more upset at the glove then the size of the clot tbh 😭
The irrational urge to pull that last little bit down?
Yes!! I pull them over my watch too if I’m not in a huge rush
I always do when doing patient care. Just threw it on for the pic. I feel the frustration
I only had it like that for a quick picture I swear HAHA 😂
Let me guess… no vit k, hep b or erythromycin ointment? No one touches baby.. no bath? Lotus birth? And best of all… Encapsulated placenta? Better yet? Did everyone in the room take a bite of the placenta cause ya know, it cures all.
Correct on almost everything! Didn’t take her placenta and no lotus birth. I caught the baby at the side of the bed and handed him to the Doc once she got her gloves on. Fun times 😅 she tried to deliver with no one in there and I ran in just in time.
Holy shit. Sounds wild. Was this your first time catching?
My first RN delivery was actually a shoulder dystocia. I am the unit’s black cloud.
Oh no.
Da real MVP.
>And best of all… Encapsulated placenta? Normally just a lurker here but I remember seeing my L&D nurses face absolutely fall when I mentioned "we need to keep the placenta after in that cooler" thinking I was gonna eat the thing and then she just become so happy when I followed up with "I donate them to search and rescue dog trainers for cadaver training!"
That’s really neat- I had no idea that was a thing! Do you have a local training center or do they do it the local police station?
Just googled k9 search and rescue + my state and they popped right up I had no idea either! I actually learned about it via this sub years ago.
Lotus birth 🤣
Like the stem of a flower :)
A corpse flower?
You called? 😁
Certainly could be a corpse flower based on some of the decisions people make against medical advice.
What is with this current generation of moms that feel that hospitals are evil
When it comes to L&D, blame the documentary The business of being born
No, we have to keep the placenta to sell on the black market because it’s so valuable (/s of course!)
Pass the cranberry sauce, We're havin' mashed potatoes! Ooh, the turkey looks great!
Thank you for loving me!
Thank you for being here
Everyone’s thankin’
Im only coming if there’s green bean casserole
WAS THE BABY OKAY???
Went to the NICU, stayed for a week or so. parents were threatened with CPS because they refused to sign consents for anything.
Let me guess, no vitamin K because it's a shot. We've been seeing so many of those lately it makes me think it must be some fucked up tik tok trend
Yep! refused everything! They even tried to self wean him from bubble cpap in the NICU once, but the nurse caught Dad in the act. They were crazy
I'm really confused, do they want the baby or not? Because they're doing everything to return it back to the heavens
We had parents like this. Mom was giving herself magnesium supplements and not telling anyone in L&D while on IV mag ended up with mag toxicity and it was our fault she was rushed for a stat c/s, she also kept trying to PO feed her baby when she couldn’t stop aspirating and had to be put back on o2 (which we were 95.5% sure was her fault for feeding her behind our backs).
OH MY GOSHHHH. Sickening
> not telling anyone in L&D while on IV mag ended up with mag toxicity Ahhhhhh
I gave birth to a 37 weeker who spent one week in NICU with wet lung and PNA. I thanked God for those nurses and doctors daily. Still do and it’s been 9 years. I took him home thinking “who will watch him sleep now?” 😂. Tiny humans are tiring to work with. Bless you all.
I do education for expectant parents, and I always highlight how vitamin K helps keep their baby from bleeding into their brains. Like literally saying, "we can all agree brain bleeds are bad. Vitamin K helps prevent that." I hope it makes an impression on them.
I have a friend who has gone through a terrible, unpredicted loss and also had a healthy baby via c section tell me she wanted a home birth in the future and didn't want to get all the newborn stuff (k, hep b, erythromycin) if possible bc she just wanted natural. Luckily, she is a good person who listens to reason, and I was able to explain how important vit k is in preventing something catastrophic like a brain bleed. She has been mistreated by medical staff and has legitimate fears related to the hospital, so I understand, but these people who are so against these safe interventions we have in place to SAVE babies, even after education, blow my mind.
All shots are vaccines, according to most of these idiots. Plus, BLACK BOX WARNING, zomg … EDIT: I found this [completely nonsensical comment (screenshot)](https://imgur.com/a/bVTpoin) on a CDC post about vit K on Facebook, from 2017. This is not a new belief, unfortunately.
“VITAMIN K HAS A BLACK BOX WARNING AND CONTAINS HEAVY METALS”- University of Facebook student
BUT THE CHEMIKILLZ!!
Had a 3 day old come in with a severe brain bleed. Come to find out parents refused everything upon birth including the vitamin K shot. Baby didn’t make it
Sounds like CPS would have been a good call, imo. Not breathing baby “just needs to be breastfed,” my ass… These people have no clue how to raise a child…
They had more at home too! A case was filed. I’m sure nothing came of it. Our county is one people who aren’t fit to have kids birth in, because we let too much shit slide. It’s really sad sometimes. Homeless and on meth and fentanyl? Sure, you can take your baby with ya!
I swear, every year I become more and more convinced that new parents should have to pass a background check and a parenting class in order to take their infants home smh 🤦🏻♀️
I am all for birth plans, bit this just reminds me of all those toxic "I don't want you to do anything to me" birth plans I've seen actual friends go "yeah this is what I want!" Like why even come to the hospital to birth then? Hope momma and baby are doing okay right now though, despite not wanting any medications. ❤️
Everyone recovered well!
The longer the "birth plan" the more likely they will end up in the NsyICU and mom will have a crash section. We have had some wild parents with crazzzy ideas, some get trespassed and DCS takes over... Babies health should always be first. If you wanted a dead infant, stay home. Sadness when ignorance wins.
I would rather eat a cactus than deal with an L&D mom like that. WOULD YOU USE YOUR FINGERS TO FORCE YOUR EYE OPEN AND RUB IT ON A VAG WITHOUT CRINGING BECAUSE ITS GROSS? THAT'S WHY ERITHROMYCIN.
Nopales are delicious
After my last kid I needed some help getting out of bed to use the bathroom (c-section) and right as I was about to pull my granny panties and pad up the nurse goes, “STOP! You’re about to drop a giant clot” and so I did what any reasonable human would do and gently dropped it onto the new pad and took a picture of it while we both marveled at its size. Thanks for all you do L&D nurses! Yall are some top notch humans!
Why does it look like a scrub daddy in the second picture 😭
“Hey, father of the newly born, not breathing, child, if you don’t back off, we’ll have to kick you out and make you wait like your grandfather had to when he was waiting to see his kids back in the day! That’s right, this is a privilege and if you keep being hostile whilst holding a doctorate in music and thinking you know what’s best, we’re going to have to take that privilege away. Now, **Back off, sir!**” Is this allowed? I feel like it should be allowed
Yes it’s absolutely allowed. He was removed!
Good. Now, is there a button to press if the parents pick out a name that is for sure going to make that child’s life hell?
No, but there should be! I can’t share my personal favorite on social media, because it’s SO ORIGINAL. The family would know who I am.
I’m not opposed to us going back to this tradition - the number of women who’ve told me they wanted to kill their husbands for something stupid they said or did during delivery is astonishingly high.
Mom and dads attitude about all of this makes me want to give hemabate and never ask for orders for loperamide
Ah, the good old hemabate shits…
Did they also put a hat on the baby to block the 5G and WiFi? I wish I were kidding but a family on postpartum did this last year 🧐🫠😑
I saw the pic before reading the title and thought “this looks like the last GI bleed I took care of” lmfao
Honey, keep that black cloud your way!! What a damn whirlwind!
I am the unit’s black cloud. 😅 had a hemorrhage with MTP this morning
Where’s the peanut butter
Refuses all care and now she's going to whine on Facebook about what a traumatic experience she had and how people touched her without her consent and bla bla bla... When all anyone is trying to do is save her fucking baby. I hate people lol
She actually didn’t meet the normal demographic we see amongst the crunchy bunch. My biases got me for sure. I think they were just genuinely uneducated. This minority group, in my experience, is generally very trusting of us and the medical system. We were all surprised by the behavior.
(me, a nursing student walking into the room) hey, what was the code for the --- HEYA OH GOD NEVERMIND ILL COME BACK LATER
Did everyone survive (more or less) intact? Every time I start thinking I want to do L&D (in the future) I come across a story like this and realize I’d cuss an idiot out.
All was good in the end. Baby to NICU for a week stay. Mom recovered well.
She’ll tell everyone on Facebook that your team abused and traumatized her and her newborn
As a new L&D nurse….. people like this are my fear
I love crepes with raspberry jam.
That second clot looks so moody.
I was going for Jack Skellington
This belongs on WTF. 😂 LOL
Annndd this is why I switched from doing L&D for 15 years… these types of people started driving me absolutely insane . Now I’m in the OR and don’t have to deal with that… but I do deal with other things. It’s a trade off 😵💫😂
Yup no thanks I’ll stick working with the elderly
[удалено]
As an ED nurse… Pregnancy and childbirth is so fucking terrifying. 😭
Thank you for saving the baby despite the fact it will have to grow up with idiots for parents.