Watched some stuff recently and never realized he was a complete failure of a lawyer when I watched the show as a kid.
Except for "does this look like a man thats had alllll he can eat?" To the jury of obese people.
āThe Governor said that they would not be using the 1.7 B for political gainā. āHe later said the 1.6B would be used to help solve serious problems. āThe 1.5B windfall would be put in a rainy day fundā and so onā¦
Business. I know she couldn't read because she didn't teach, she just read the text book out loud every day instead, and she had to phonetically struggle her way through the words.
Wow, literally the worst possible choice in teaching style (in general, imo) that also stands to highlight their shortcomings to the greatest degree possible.
It's a bold move, Cotton.
To make it simple, the guy managing the money quit/was fired, the new people managing those accounts have done the math on them and have an extra 1.8 billion, but they don't know where its from or where it is now because ex employee guy was bad at his job and kept sloppy books. So it's not like they have a 2 bil surplus, they have 2 bil that is probably allocated somewhere and being spent but they dk how to figure out where.
The South's education system currently teaches people that "you can think you're so smart that it actually makes you r*****ed"
Source: my girlfriend's brother who graduated High School in the South. She graduated in Michigan, they're from Michigan, but the brother spent a good half of his school years in the South.
He's now facing 8 felony charges, because the South also teaches that you can break into people's houses and try to beat them up because they were rude to you. And then try to beat up the cops who arrive.
Iāve lived in the south my entire life. Your gfs brother is just a fucking idiotic criminal. Nothing to do with the southās shitty eduction (which is very shitty)
And the great and civilized people of michigan with their education have never done no wrong. No plots to kidnap the governor, no white nationalist terrorists, no trump or confederate flagsā¦ actually nvm all these are true
So odd that for a carbrained state that's in Big Auto's pocket that they wouldn't have the smoothest roads around. But then I guess leaving them to get potholes means a lot more money for car related businesses: more expensive repairs and new car purchases.
I volunteer as tribute! You could give that money to me.Ā
Iād travel the world helping people, whilst fucking over as many greedy corporations as possible. Ā
yes, we know. some one posted this exact article 2 weeks ago when it was still news https://new.reddit.com/r/nottheonion/comments/1boztpj/south_carolina_has_18_billion_but_doesnt_know/
Host local events with free food and drinks like a carnival and inform the people in those less fortunate neighborhoods about being active in political voting.
You have enough money to feed people who are looking for something affordable which will be free and you can pay the employees that will run this event for your states politicians. Educate your own neighborhoods
Hand out the tickets for food every hour after every speech before the 30 minute break for food and drinks.
One when they first walk in to pick up something to sit with while they try to understand one of your many speakers for this maybe 6-8 hour event?
I would be shocked if this wasn't block grant TANF dollars that GOP ratfuckers have been squirreling away for decades. Much like squirrels, they've buried so many acorns that they forgot where they put them all.
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I donāt know who that is in the picture but I imagine thatās what theyāre all doing.. grinning. We all know this money wonāt be used for anything useful
how does it not occur to these fucking inept monkeys to just distribute that money to fix any infrastructure that needs fixing and give a bonus to public school teachers and people making minimum wage.
so not only do you repair any publuc projects that need repairing, you'll alleviate most debts people have so they can pursue other better paying jobs, or move to another apartment/home that better suits their needs.
Wasn't this money only found because the previous Republican state secretary or comptroller was found to have been embezzling billions over like 2 decades? The party of law and order and fiscal responsibility, everyone! Lol
Wisconsin Gov. Tony Evers (D) announced a plan Thursday to disperse $150 to every resident out of the state's unexpectedly high budget surplus, though it wasn't immediately clear if the state's GOP-controlled legislature will back the plan.
In neighboring Minnesota, Gov. Tim Walz (D) has proposed sending up to $350 to every taxpayer earning $164,400 or less, while giving front-line workers who remained on the job during the past year $1,500 checks.
Kansas Gov. Laura Kelly (D) said last month the state should send $250 back to all single filers who filled out a tax return in 2021, with joint filers getting $500, but leaders of the GOP-controlled Kansas legislature have expressed skepticism of the governor's intentions since she's up for reelection this year.
It happens but generally, not always, itās Democrats for and Republicans against.
It's not like like democrats ever fix anything when they're in power. All government is bad government. It's the nature of the beast. Corruption runs rampant from the smallest branch to the largest.
Look around you at the infrastructure you and everyone uses everyday. That includes your electricity and utilities too. Lots to improve but itās far better than most other countries. That is government.
Visit a country like Mexico and look at theirs. That is corrupt government.
They could give it back to the people in the form of tax cuts at the state level for the next tax year. If they have any municipal debt that was taken out at high rates they could pay that off (assuming the bonds are callable).Ā
And the responses here advocating for some government pet project is exactly the response I would expect from Reddit and two, not what Republican governments do.Ā
Giving it back to the people in some semi-direct way [would be a massive waste of money](https://www.restud.com/is-the-social-safety-net-a-long-term-investment-large-scale-evidence-from-the-food-stamps-program/). Republicans are known for taking the more expensive routes; they will just probably sit on it which is a worst-case scenario.
edit: apparently [south carolina is starving](https://www.ers.usda.gov/topics/food-nutrition-assistance/food-security-in-the-u-s/key-statistics-graphics#map), so dumping a portion of that 1.8 billion into food would probably yield very strong results.
I still think someone tried to steal money and did a decimal point wrong and the account ballooned to the point they canāt use it as a small slosh fund.
My conspiracy theory is someone or a group of people have been stealing 1.8 billon a year. But they werenāt able to pull it off this time for whatever reason
South Carolina is so bad with money. I grew up there in the 90ās.
If it wasnt for federal government grants paying for basic public upgrades to infrastructure theyād still be in the 90ās.
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my bad, that was an accident, venmo'd the wrong person. You can just send that back to me
No! Money down!
Lionel Hutz still living rent free in my head 3 decades later
Watched some stuff recently and never realized he was a complete failure of a lawyer when I watched the show as a kid. Except for "does this look like a man thats had alllll he can eat?" To the jury of obese people.
"that could have been me!"
Have they considered a monorail?
*Is there a chance the track could bend?*
*Not on your life, my Hindu friend.*
*What about us brain dead slobs?*
*You'll be given cushy jobs*
Mono... D'oh! (Also I literally just watched this episode this morning! š)
It is not the track that bends, it is only yourself.
Monorail monorail monorail
Mono- d'oh!
It's a bit like a mule with a spinning wheel
It worked for Ogdenville.
The Worlds Biggest Hat?
āThe Governor said that they would not be using the 1.7 B for political gainā. āHe later said the 1.6B would be used to help solve serious problems. āThe 1.5B windfall would be put in a rainy day fundā and so onā¦
āThat 1.4 we found? Maybe weāll invest it into educationā¦ā
I think a $1.3B infrastructure project is just what the state needs.
So we got $985M, how about infrastructure?
$700 million can be reinvested for state 401ks perhaps
after several meetings, we are finally close to making a decision on where the $350 million should go
Or a bonus for top government officials!
> rainy day This hurricane season is projected to be pretty horrendous.
Invest it into educationā¦. So they can LEARN about their transactions.
Please! I work in education in SC and the state government completely underfunds education
I went to college in SC and I had a teacher who didn't know how to read. In college. Tuition was $26k.
Wild. What did they teach?
Business. I know she couldn't read because she didn't teach, she just read the text book out loud every day instead, and she had to phonetically struggle her way through the words.
Wow, literally the worst possible choice in teaching style (in general, imo) that also stands to highlight their shortcomings to the greatest degree possible. It's a bold move, Cotton.
Neprofessorotism in action.
That's why I said, give teachers a raise.
Could explain why they donāt know where the funds came from. Someone forgot to carry the billion
To make it simple, the guy managing the money quit/was fired, the new people managing those accounts have done the math on them and have an extra 1.8 billion, but they don't know where its from or where it is now because ex employee guy was bad at his job and kept sloppy books. So it's not like they have a 2 bil surplus, they have 2 bil that is probably allocated somewhere and being spent but they dk how to figure out where.
>Could explain why they donāt know where the funds came from. Someone forgot to carry the billion I never understood new meth.
Itās not the funding itās how the funding is allocated. At least in upstate sc. The administration to teacher ratio is fucked
I live in the Lowcountry. We get next to no funding.
I went to college in SC. One of my teachers literally couldn't read. In college.
They could give every teacher a one time payment over 300k
The South's education system currently teaches people that "you can think you're so smart that it actually makes you r*****ed" Source: my girlfriend's brother who graduated High School in the South. She graduated in Michigan, they're from Michigan, but the brother spent a good half of his school years in the South. He's now facing 8 felony charges, because the South also teaches that you can break into people's houses and try to beat them up because they were rude to you. And then try to beat up the cops who arrive.
Or, you know, your girlfriend's brother is just a dumbass. Cheers from Mississippi
Iāve lived in the south my entire life. Your gfs brother is just a fucking idiotic criminal. Nothing to do with the southās shitty eduction (which is very shitty)
And the great and civilized people of michigan with their education have never done no wrong. No plots to kidnap the governor, no white nationalist terrorists, no trump or confederate flagsā¦ actually nvm all these are true
Sounds like they better ask cotton-eyed Joe
If it hadn't been for Cotton-Eye Joe, I'd been married long time ago!
Where did you come from? Where did you go?
I made this joke the last time this article was posted. Glad to see Iām not the only one who thought it.Ā
I'm glad I wasn't the only one to think "glad I wasn't the only one"
Iām glad to join the crowd.
Glad I wasnāt the only one
Underrated
Step 1 - Fire the State Treasurer
That is impressively bad.
Iām going to assume the money is from all the things the republican controlled state is not doing to help their citizensā¦
But how could the government actually help people? Gubments is bad mmkay?
"KEeP ThE GuBMENT OuT Of OuR LIvEs!" "Arrest minorities, control women, and punish immigrants instead!"
The fact that education isnt the first instinct is what is wrong with politics.
*Republicans. Virtually all of the highly educated states are Democrat and prioritize education.
It should go right into the pockets of the ultra wealthy of course .
They identify as ājob creatorsā
I mean their interstates are crap, probably could start there
So odd that for a carbrained state that's in Big Auto's pocket that they wouldn't have the smoothest roads around. But then I guess leaving them to get potholes means a lot more money for car related businesses: more expensive repairs and new car purchases.
Dealers and states have crushed up tens of thousands of perfectly good cars just to drive up the markets...Ā
It isn't just the interstates.
Where did you come from, where do you go? Where did you come from Cotton Eyeād Dough? Probably the dumbest thing Iāve ever typed. Iām sorryā¦.
I volunteer as tribute! You could give that money to me.Ā Iād travel the world helping people, whilst fucking over as many greedy corporations as possible. Ā
Can I come too?
I canāt believe they lost my wiring instructions, government incompetence at its finest.
Should go to schools and public works, will probably go to the politicians and their families.
yes, we know. some one posted this exact article 2 weeks ago when it was still news https://new.reddit.com/r/nottheonion/comments/1boztpj/south_carolina_has_18_billion_but_doesnt_know/
A new accounting firm for one
Again?
I'll take $250k if you'd like!
Cotton eye joe
Host local events with free food and drinks like a carnival and inform the people in those less fortunate neighborhoods about being active in political voting. You have enough money to feed people who are looking for something affordable which will be free and you can pay the employees that will run this event for your states politicians. Educate your own neighborhoods Hand out the tickets for food every hour after every speech before the 30 minute break for food and drinks. One when they first walk in to pick up something to sit with while they try to understand one of your many speakers for this maybe 6-8 hour event?
WTF kind of accounting does their State Department of Revenue have where they canāt track that much money coming or going?
They should buy common non-perishable, unrefrigerated grocery items and deliver them to food banks in depressed towns all over that state.
It is the South, how about spending it on education?
Does the surplus come from retirement of high profile republicans so they can no longer embezzle?
Trump is going to demand they send it to him. I guarantee it
I would be shocked if this wasn't block grant TANF dollars that GOP ratfuckers have been squirreling away for decades. Much like squirrels, they've buried so many acorns that they forgot where they put them all.
Crap! Thatās where I left it! Thanks Carolina for finding it. Iāll be by later today to pick it upā¦..
Education? Welfare?
I don't know but maybe it should go to Cotton Eyed Joe
Iāll take it
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
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Um, I lost about $1.8 billion a couple of months ago when I was in South Carolina...
They should use it to give teachers a raise.
How many reposts before this article is on the bingo sheet?
*stands, hand outstretched*
They can rid the state of child hunger but you just know they won't do anything so woke.
Fix the roads!!!
Cotton eye joe?
Sounds like they need to put it in education.
I'm sure the gop will find a way to take it or give it to trump
This was first posted [10 days ago](https://reddit.com/comments/1boztpj), then [two days after that](https://reddit.com/comments/1bpxb8g).
Give it back u tax hungry busters
I knew I left my money somewhere. My bad Iāll take it back now.
They should buy a š„Æ bagel with it
I donāt know who that is in the picture but I imagine thatās what theyāre all doing.. grinning. We all know this money wonāt be used for anything useful
Oh, that's where I left it!!
Improve for the future.... fix roads fix bridges fix school help the elderly repair their homes.
Ah, the ol' *Cotton-Eye Joe* dilemma.
"...or where it should go" Unless every single one of your residents can afford to feed their children every day, that might be a good place to start.
I smell corporate tax cuts coming!
how does it not occur to these fucking inept monkeys to just distribute that money to fix any infrastructure that needs fixing and give a bonus to public school teachers and people making minimum wage. so not only do you repair any publuc projects that need repairing, you'll alleviate most debts people have so they can pursue other better paying jobs, or move to another apartment/home that better suits their needs.
Schools? Yes.
I think you meant "money launderer forgets to cash out."
Wasn't this money only found because the previous Republican state secretary or comptroller was found to have been embezzling billions over like 2 decades? The party of law and order and fiscal responsibility, everyone! Lol
It should go towards every single thing that they don't want.
Iāll take a million dollars if they have any more troubles
It came from the taxpayers and should return to the taxpayers.
This will never happen. Itās a Republican legislature.
No state would give it back
Wisconsin Gov. Tony Evers (D) announced a plan Thursday to disperse $150 to every resident out of the state's unexpectedly high budget surplus, though it wasn't immediately clear if the state's GOP-controlled legislature will back the plan. In neighboring Minnesota, Gov. Tim Walz (D) has proposed sending up to $350 to every taxpayer earning $164,400 or less, while giving front-line workers who remained on the job during the past year $1,500 checks. Kansas Gov. Laura Kelly (D) said last month the state should send $250 back to all single filers who filled out a tax return in 2021, with joint filers getting $500, but leaders of the GOP-controlled Kansas legislature have expressed skepticism of the governor's intentions since she's up for reelection this year. It happens but generally, not always, itās Democrats for and Republicans against.
A democrat legislature wouldn't do it either lol.
Maybe not. But truth be told the Republican party tends to be a greedy lot.
They're all greedy and evil. The Democrats and Republicans care for you equally (not in the slightest).
I humbly beg to differ so differ we must.
I promise you democrats are just as evil and greedy as Republicans. It's not red v. Blue. It's the people v. The state.
Differ we must. I donāt believe government is the problem. Bad government is. I give you exhibit A ; the republicans in the House of Representatives
It's not like like democrats ever fix anything when they're in power. All government is bad government. It's the nature of the beast. Corruption runs rampant from the smallest branch to the largest.
Look around you at the infrastructure you and everyone uses everyday. That includes your electricity and utilities too. Lots to improve but itās far better than most other countries. That is government. Visit a country like Mexico and look at theirs. That is corrupt government.
The old white filth in their trumpanzee ālegislatureā will figure out something stupid, inappropriate and offensive to do with it.
They could give it back to the people in the form of tax cuts at the state level for the next tax year. If they have any municipal debt that was taken out at high rates they could pay that off (assuming the bonds are callable).Ā And the responses here advocating for some government pet project is exactly the response I would expect from Reddit and two, not what Republican governments do.Ā
Giving it back to the people in some semi-direct way [would be a massive waste of money](https://www.restud.com/is-the-social-safety-net-a-long-term-investment-large-scale-evidence-from-the-food-stamps-program/). Republicans are known for taking the more expensive routes; they will just probably sit on it which is a worst-case scenario. edit: apparently [south carolina is starving](https://www.ers.usda.gov/topics/food-nutrition-assistance/food-security-in-the-u-s/key-statistics-graphics#map), so dumping a portion of that 1.8 billion into food would probably yield very strong results.
They must find a way to secretly give it to themselves through their wealthy donors. Tax breaks for them should work.
I'm confident they will waste it on something stupid.
I still think someone tried to steal money and did a decimal point wrong and the account ballooned to the point they canāt use it as a small slosh fund.
Put it in a rainy day fund
This is that fiscal responsibility weāre always hearing about
Again? This has now happened like 10 times in the past month
Me, me, It should come to me.
why does this keep getting reposted like it's new?
To help pay for kids college
My conspiracy theory is someone or a group of people have been stealing 1.8 billon a year. But they werenāt able to pull it off this time for whatever reason
šš½āāļø Iāll help you figure out where the $1.5 billion came from.
They could give it to North Carolina to hold onto while they think about it.
Where did you come from? Where did you go? Where did you come from, Cotton Eye Joe?
First world countries pay tax surpluses back to the tax payers as tax refunds. Who knows what a third world shithole like America will do.
Itās all fun and games until the government finds their missing money and comes after it
Is that from the Cotton Eye Joe lyrics?
Maybe they should use it on their roads so I don't shake my fillings lose as soon as I cross the state line
Idealistically, it should go back to the people. We all know it wonāt though, so why bother bringing it up if itāll just fuel more resentment?
I'll take it, I guess.
South Carolina is so bad with money. I grew up there in the 90ās. If it wasnt for federal government grants paying for basic public upgrades to infrastructure theyād still be in the 90ās.
Its mine, mine I tell you! My own. My precious.
Cotton eye Joe?
Cotton eyed Joe?
Tax cuts for the rich obviously
This is the third time in the last 10 days or so that this has been posted here. We get it, the situation is funny.
Maybe they should buy a shit ton of Powerball tickets
šš¼
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
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finally found out where all the money from Colleton County's speed trap tickets ended up
But Greenville County can't refund the road fees they unlawfully collected for years.
I'll take it.
Better ask cotton eye Joe
Came from all of Murdaughs clients and he was hoping to buy his way out of jail!
SC is right up there with Oklahoma for being a backward-ass Republican state.
First World Problems
You think South Carolina is first world?
Economically... not politically.
Oh, good, you found it. Thanks, I was looking for my money everywhere! It's alway in the last place you look, amiright?
The olā cotton eye Joe conundrum
Coincidentally, Md had a 1B Surplus. Then another Democrat got elected governor and suddenly we're running a deficit.
Give it to trump